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Resentment-Free Relationships
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Resentment-Free Relationships

Author: Becky Smith

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Welcome to "Resentment-Free Relationships," where we get real about fixing relationships without the drama. If you're tired of feeling constantly drained and weighed down by resentment, this is where you can stop people pleasing and pretending. Regain your sense of self, learn to set boundaries, and create the meaningful relationships you've always craved.


222 Episodes
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Special guest Denita Bremer, LCS certified trauma coach , shares her story and insights into trauma healing. Learn how to identify and understand trauma, explore the role of the nervous system, and discover practical tools to navigate fear and build safety in relationships. Instagram @Denitabremer https://denitabremer.com/
In this podcast episode, we continued our conversation with Kristen Rutter about the Faith Matters Conference. Here are the main points: Jared Halverson talked about understanding opposites and encouraging open questioning without judgment. Patrick Mason discussed the importance of creating a safe space for open discussions and the commitment to stay in the faith for positive change. Jodi Moore addressed common fears related to faith and the need for empathy and understanding in addressing them. The compass analogy stressed staying grounded in faith while seeking truth from various sources. You can connect with Kristen Rutter on her Instagram (@Kristen.rutter.coaching) and find resources on her website (KristenRutterCoaching.com) for spiritual and self-connection.

178. Anger Phobia

2023-10-1113:04

Anger phobia is an extreme fear of anger in oneself and others. It can lead to avoidance of conflict, which can damage relationships and prevent personal growth. Key Points Anger is a normal human emotion, but it can be harmful if it is not expressed in a healthy way. There are two main components of anger phobia: judgment and fear. Judgment can lead us to believe that anger is always bad, while fear can lead us to avoid it altogether. Both judgment and fear can be based on past experiences, such as being raised in a household where anger was not expressed in a healthy way. It is important to challenge our judgments about anger and understand the underlying fears. Once we understand our fears, we can start to develop healthier ways of dealing with anger. Questions to Consider What is your relationship with anger? What do you think about anger in yourself and others? What fears do you have about anger? How do your fears about anger affect your relationships? What can you do to develop healthier ways of dealing with anger? Action Steps Start by paying attention to your thoughts and feelings about anger. Notice when you are judging anger or feeling afraid of it. Challenge your judgments about anger. Ask yourself if they are true. Explore your fears about anger. What do you fear will happen if you express or experience anger from others? Develop healthy ways of expressing and dealing with anger. This may involve learning new communication skills or seeking professional help. Conclusion By understanding our judgments and fears about anger, we can develop healthier ways of dealing with this emotion.
Tara Schmidt, a licensed marriage and family therapist, gives more real-life examples of communicating better in a family.
Tara Schmidt, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, joins the podcast to share her wisdom and advice on relationships. The episode explores essential aspects of relationships, focusing on presence, trauma, attachment, and effective communication. The Importance of Presence: Presence is crucial in relationships, as trauma often stems from past wounds. Trauma is defined as emotional wounds that affect our perceptions and responses. Relationship issues often result from individual learnings and past wounds. Staying present helps prevent misunderstandings and reactions triggered by unresolved traumas. Recognizing and Managing Triggers: Emotional reactions can signal underlying trauma or wounding. Slowing down and identifying the root of emotional reactions is essential. Communicating with your partner about your triggers fosters understanding and compassion. Cultivating awareness and self-regulation skills is crucial for managing emotional triggers. Attachment Styles and Their Impact: Secure attachment involves creating a safe environment where individuals can be themselves. Insecure attachment styles, such as anxious and avoidant attachment, result from inconsistent caregiving. Anxious attachment can lead to clinginess and seeking constant reassurance. Avoidant attachment may result in self-sufficiency and emotional distance. Nurturing Safe Attachments: Parents should create emotional safety and support in the home. Safety includes allowing everyone to be themselves without fear of ridicule. Healthy conflict resolution models positive relationship dynamics for children. Balancing authenticity with emotional support promotes secure attachments. Effective Communication: The speaker-listener technique emphasizes active listening and empathy. The listener's role is to understand the speaker's perspective without defensiveness. Suspending one's own narrative temporarily facilitates empathetic listening. Encouraging empathy and understanding in relationships leads to improved communication. Conclusion: Building resentment-free relationships involves presence, trauma recognition, attachment awareness, and empathetic communication. Effective communication requires active listening and suspending one's perspective temporarily. Nurturing safe attachments and emotional support within families is essential for healthy relationships.

173. Sunday Talk

2023-09-0626:21

How to create a new habit. The "USED" Acronym: U: Understand Doctrine, Principle, and Application. S: Start Small and Simple. E: Experiment to Find What Works. D: Drop Self-Judgment. Applying the "USED" Framework: Practical examples of applying the framework to daily life. Conclusion: Encouraging listeners to use the "USED" framework to follow principles consistently. Sign up for the Find Your Calm Yoga-Life Coaching Workshop at www.yogaascension.com
Episode Title: The Perfectionism Trap: Discovering the Path to Self-Acceptance Episode Description: In this episode, join Becky, your host, as she dives into the intricate realm of perfectionism. Sharing her personal experiences, Becky opens up about her battles with perfectionism, procrastination, and people-pleasing—challenges many can relate to. Drawing inspiration from Brené Brown's insights, she guides you through the true nature of perfectionism and its impact on self-worth. Explore the transformational power of redefining "perfect," liberating yourself from its grip, and embracing self-acceptance. Becky offers practical strategies for overcoming perfectionism and finding peace in imperfection. Key Takeaways: Discovering the interconnected struggle with perfectionism, procrastination, and people-pleasing. Brené Brown's perspective on perfectionism as a shield against pain, judgment, and shame. Rethinking the definition of "perfect" and its evolution across cultures. Unveiling the weight of perfectionism and its effects on self-worth. Recognizing the self-destructive nature of chasing perfection. Strategies to challenge perfectionism, including self-compassion and shifting expectations. Episode Highlights: The unexpected shift in topic reveals Becky's passion for addressing perfectionism. Insights from Brené Brown's research and her insights into perfectionism. Redefining the word "perfect" to encompass deeper qualities beyond flawlessness. Strategies for embracing authenticity and breaking free from the perfectionism cycle. Real-life instances of applying strategies, from video content creation to fitness instruction. Encouragement to identify perfectionism's presence and take steps towards change. Connect and Learn More: Ready to conquer anxiety? Join Becky's upcoming Yoga Life coaching workshop "Find Your Calm" on September 30, 2023, from 4 to 6 PM. Gain valuable tools to manage anxiety and find serenity in everyday life. Secure your spot now and take the first step toward a centered existence. www.yogaacension.com Thank you for joining. Connect with us on social media @beckysmithcoaching.com on Instagram and continue the conversation. Remember, self-acceptance is the key. Until next time, practice kindness toward yourself and embrace the beauty of imperfection.
Setting boundaries is an important part of taking care of ourselves. But it can be difficult, especially if we're used to putting the needs of others before our own. When we set a boundary, we may feel guilty, angry, or scared. These negative feelings are normal, but they don't mean that we're doing the wrong thing.
This episode offers 5 healthy ways to deal with family members you don't like. The good news is you don't have to like them to start creating a healthier dynamic right now.
In this episode, we explore the paradox of decision-making. On the one hand, we know that making decisions is essential to living a fulfilling life. On the other hand, we often find ourselves paralyzed by fear, indecision, or the feeling that there is no right answer. We discuss the different factors influencing our decision-making, including our thoughts, emotions, and values. We also explore some simple tools and techniques that can help us make better decisions, even when there is no clear-cut answer. Making good decisions is a powerful skill to help us achieve our goals and live our best lives.** Here are some of the topics we discuss in the episode: The different types of decisions we make in our lives The factors that influence our decision-making The difference between good, better, and best decisions How to overcome the fear of making decisions How to own our decisions, no matter the outcome Simple tools and techniques for making better decisions Enjoy this episode! www.beckysmithcoaching.com
Becky discusses the Enneagram personality type 2, also known as the Helper. She talks about the key traits of type 2, both positive and negative, and how type 2s can grow and transform. Becky also shares her personal experience as a type 2 and offers tips for other type 2s looking to improve their lives. The podcast is packed with valuable information for type 2s, and it is also a great introduction to the Enneagram for anyone who is interested in learning more about this fascinating personality typing system. Here are some of the key points: Type 2s are motivated by the desire to be loved and accepted. They are often very caring and nurturing towards others but can also be people-pleasers and codependent. Type 2s can grow and transform by learning to set boundaries, say no, and focus on their own needs. The Enneagram is a powerful tool for self-understanding and personal growth. If you are a type 2 or if you are interested in learning more about the Enneagram, I highly recommend listening to this podcast. It is packed with valuable information that can help you better understand yourself and live a more fulfilling life.
How to make Progress? Celebrate each step as you move forward. Acknowledge small wins. Reflect on your progress. Celebrate your small wins. Check out my new Website www.beckysmithcoaching.com
Tune in to explore the delicate balance between belonging to others and being true to yourself. Learn how knowing your own wants, setting boundaries, and building emotional tolerance will set you free from Resentment.

164. Personal Freedom

2023-07-0408:38

Learn how the lies we tell ourselves can imprison us. It is beautiful to realize that you are in charge of your own personal freedom, no one else. The president, Congress, Supreme Court, or even the Constitution cannot entirely grant you freedom. Freedom is an inside job. Set yourself free by clicking the link https://calendly.com/believefitness/45 to chat with me on a freedom discovery call.
Discover "Resentment Free Relationships": Uncover the secrets to stronger connections without resentment. If you're tired of feeling anxious, frustrated, judged, hurt, or resentful in your relationships then this is the episode for you. Schedule a free 20-minute call and start your "Resentment-Free Relationship" today. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
Learn three practical strategies to handle difficult situations with grace: finding the truth, embracing discomfort, and focusing on the positive. Improve your personal and family relationships by tuning in, and start owning it with grace today! Click for your free fix my Relationships Call https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
This episode explores the fine line between conflict and contention and why understanding this difference is crucial in relationships. Awareness is the first step in handling conflict with grace and fostering healthier relationships. Are you ready to resolve your conflicts before they become contentious sign up for my free Fix Your Relationship call now.
Join us as we explore the importance of accepting and learning from bad days in this episode. Becky shares her personal experience and highlights the value of allowing ourselves to feel emotions without judgment. Discover how curiosity and acceptance can lead to valuable insights on embracing life's ups and downs with grace.
Learn why recreation matters, and how it can help you re-create your marriage.
Becky gives you some language to think of yourself and to think of motherhood in a different way. One that's maybe a little more truthful, that's a little less perfectionistic, and one that can kind of shatter that pedestal and that idea, and bring it back down to the real world that we live in.
Welcome to Short and Sweet. The segment where I'm here to give you a quick dose of inspiration. I'll be sharing a tip. Tool strategy or just some food for thought. All in bite-sized portions. Whether you're on the go or need a quick pick-me-up, I've got you covered. This week. Feeling stuck. Look for the judgment.
Introducing a new segment called Short and Sweet. It will be just what it sounds like. Just a few things that are on my mind. Maybe they're quick wins. Maybe they're a little bit of inspiration or aha moments that I've had during the week. Enjoy!
Life coach Nancy Taylor shares tips and advice on managing your time as a work-at-home mom. We'll discuss common challenges, prioritizing, minimizing distractions, self-care, and avoiding burnout. Join us for this informative episode and learn from Nancy's wisdom and experience.
In this podcast, Becky talks about celebrating personal achievements, conquering the fear of self-promotion, and daring to dream big. Sign up for the dream big retreat. https://polite-band-851.myflodesk.com
As moms, we're often expected to be our families' heroes, taking on their burdens and solving their problems. But what if there was a better way? In this episode, you will learn how to shift your mindset from helping and fixing to empowering and supporting. So, moms, are you ready to serve without sacrificing your well-being? Tune in to this episode of "How to Serve Without Helping or Fixing" . Join the dream big retreat https://polite-band-851.myflodesk.com
In this episode, we're joined by certified Life Coach Nicole Ellis to talk about fatherhood and how dads can go from just surviving to thriving at home. If you constantly fight the same battles and feel like you need to be on guard all the time, this is the episode for you. Discover how to succeed at home and create a life for you and your family to which you can't wait to come home. Don't miss it! Find Nicole at https://www.happinessperspective.com/ On instagram https://instagram.com/happinessperspective?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Part two of how to create healthy boundaries with Sabrina. In this episode, you will learn What is and isn’t a boundary. Difference between a request and boundary. A boundary is about getting your own back and allowing others their agency. The more ourselves that we are, the greater capacity we have to have a good relationship with someone else. If we get our own back by being radically honest, deciding ahead of time, and following through on our boundaries, then it allows us to let people be who they are, allows us to be who we are, and makes the relationship so much better. Three kinds of business: Ours, Others, Gods Boundaries take courage. Courage doesn’t feel good at the moment. Boundaries are there to improve relationships, not sever or hurt them. They are tools to practice unconditional love relationships better. Struggling with a boundary talk to a coach. https://calendly.com/sabrinadejong/coaching-time https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
Discover the key to healthier relationships by learning how to create strong boundaries.  Sabrina and I break down the steps to creating healthy boundaries that will improve and transform your relationships.    Find Sabrina at https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/perspective-detective/id1552891883?i=1000597920594 and on Instagram @sabrinaperspectivedetective  schedule a boundary checkup with becky at https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
In this episode, Darla shares her insights and tips on defining your purpose and taking action. She also shares her experiences and how she has navigated obstacles in her journey toward living her purpose.  Don't miss this inspiring episode as we dive deep into the topic of living your purpose with Darla Trendler.  Be sure and subscribe to the podcast for more ways to be Happy with Yourself.   Click https://calendly.com/believefitness/45 for a Free Find My Purpose Call Start small: Remember that living in your purpose can be as simple as making a difference in your neighborhood or being a supportive friend to those around you. Be open to change: Be open to change and be willing to adapt your goals and plans as needed. Recognize that you are a participant in God's work: Remember that we all have a role to play in the greater good and that every act of kindness and compassion can make a difference. Embrace being unseen: Understand that living in your purpose doesn't always mean being in the spotlight or receiving recognition. Making a difference in the lives of others is what truly matters. Stay positive and motivated: Keep a positive attitude and stay motivated in your journey toward living your purpose, no matter your challenges.
How to Change Your Reality. What I learned from Brooke Snow at the Creation Coach School Graduation. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
How To Break up With Fear. Learn where fear is holding you back schedule a free session today. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
3 ways to end conflict without being a pushover.  If this episode resonated with you you might be a people pleaser schedule a free call today, and let’s get to the root of the problem. Click here. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
How to Have More Time. 
https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
Three strategies to manage an uncomfortable icky conversation.
3 Ways Insecurity is Costing You. Sign up for a free Insecurity check up and let’s find out how insecurity is costing you. Get on my calendar https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
Do you ever get weary of the advice to just be yourself? If you have wondered how to do that, listen and learn 3 strategies to be like the girl in the mirror. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
Family reunions can be a mixed bag. You look forward to it, but you also may have some apprehension and anxiety. If you can relate, listen as Becky shares 6 strategies to help you truly enjoy your time with extended family. Want more help with family relationships? I got you! Sign up for a free consult. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
Are you feeling some anxiety or nervousness about an upcoming event like public speaking, a new job, or travel?  In this episode you will learn three simple strategies for managing situational anxiety.  
Let's talk about sarcasm. Let's talk about sarcasm within relationships. Let's talk about how sarcasm affects relationships. Especially the marital relationship.  In this episode, you will learn three simple strategies for how to deal with sarcasm, especially mean sarcasm.
Heather shares what people misunderstand the most about being a single Mom; "I've never liked the term single mom. If I'm married, I never have to identify myself as a married mom. I wouldn't introduce myself as a married mom. You get to be a married woman with kids, but I get to be a single mom. And so, for me, I'm not a single mom. I'm a single woman with kids. This helped me be able to maneuver my life a little bit differently. I do get to be a woman first."
 Growing up, especially as a little girl, we are told to be nice, to look nice, to act nice. We learned very quickly, "nice" was a quick way to gain approval, and get outside validation. Maybe it became a shield and as a protection to save you from others judgements.  But what if nice isn't serving you anymore? In fact what if nice is holding you back? What if nice is a limiting belief that is causing you to stay stuck in your life? Listen to this weeks episode to see if it sounds like you.
Are you avoiding the hard stuff?  Are you lucky charming it? Sign up for a free mini session today. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
What is self silencing and why does it matter?  If you are done with the resentment and frustration of silencing yourself, sign up for a free mini session today. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
This episode is for you if you...... 1. Say YES when you mean NO. 2. Apologize when you are not sorry and even when your mad. 3. Avoid confrontation at all costs. 4. Put everyone else’s needs first. 5. Feel responsible for everyone else’s life and feelings.
Do you ever feel like you are stopped and you're not making progress? Like maybe you are never gonna get there and something has gone wrong in your own personal development. Do you ever feel like that? Listen this week for simple ways to make progress. Sign up for a free discovery call. https://calendly.com/believefitness/45
Did you know that four in 10 millennials who have attended the temple to receive their endowment have never returned. Is this statistic surprising to you? Kristen helps us understand how to learn to love temple attendance and make it a part of our lives.  @kristenwalkersmith and www.kristenwalkersmith.com
Harnessing the power of mindset and menstrual cycles to go big on what matters. @jadealexandercoaching
What are you going to believe about you in 2022? Are you tired of listening to the same old tired story... that you are not good enough, that something is wrong with you, that you can't change? Then send me a message to join my Back to you in 2022 online goal challenge and get back to the highest best version of yourself! DM me @beckysmithcoaching or email becky@beckysmithcoaching.com
Does family Scripture study feel time consuming and frustrating? Do you have one minute to spare? No seriously, if you have one minute you can do family scripture study. My guest Kristen Walker Smith shares the brilliant idea of one minute scripture study. Daily devotionals done in just one minute. listen as she shares how the idea came about and how you can make it a part of your daily life.  Find Kristen on Instagram at @kristenwalkersmith Listen to her podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/one-minute-scripture-study-an-lds-podcast/id1501755896
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