Zero Doinks: World's Weirdest Chicago Bears Podcast

Bonus ep of Zero Doinks as the Illini march into Boston for their first Sweet 16 appearance in nearly 20 years. Will Bill Doinks be there in the flesh to witness a potential run to the Final 4? Odds are decent. Plus Dan Doinks pops his head in from Florida to give his take on the Justin Fields trade and the Bears current state of being all the way back. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

We are sitting here, as free agency is beyond hot, waiting for a big move from Ryan Poles and the Bears. Depth is great (that's what she said) but where is the star power? It's time, Bears. Wow us. Also, does anyone want Justin Fields? Are we still Team Caleb? Plus, March Madness is just around the corner. Thank you for hanging with us for SIX SEASONS. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

We didn't die, we just needed time to digest the reality that the Flus is back. At least there's a new offensive playcaller in the house now in Shane Waldron, and at least he has had success in the league. But what's the plan for 2024 and beyond? We look at how free agency could shape Ryan Poles's options in the draft and we finally pick a QB lane, all of these weeks later. Plus will Dan go above .500 in "Keep An Eye on Dan" or will his dreams fade? Some Illini hoops talk, including the uncomfortable subject of Terrence Shannon's legal woes. Gray Balls making noise? Find out all about it and more. Thanks for listening to another season! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

Incredibly, the Bears land the number one pick for the second-straight year thanks to the 20/20 vision of GM Ryan Poles. Is Poles going to ride with Matt Eberflus, Luke Getsy and Justin Fields in 2024? Or will the opportunity to clean house be too enticing? Perhaps Week 18 at Green Bay, with a chance to ruin their season, will carry some weight one way or another. Happy new years, Doinkers. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

Well, that weekend of football was quite disheartening. We try and find words that make us feel better about the present while keeping an eye on the near and long future. We also try and figure out what Tiny Tim's deal is. Plus tons more. Thanks for listening, it's still worth it we think. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

This is an absolute squirrely one, though we mix in actual Bears talk. The Bears are actually giving us hope and a vision for what they can develop into. They somehow find themselves one game out of the wild card yet still would be drafting fifth (and first, thanks Carolina) if the season were to end today. Dan and Bill are jazzed for what is going to be a big game at Cleveland. Win on Sunday and hope begins to develop for the first time in years. Still, dilemmas and big choices await GM Ryan Poles, regardless of how the season shakes out. We also get distracted by talk of Tommy DeVito, Grimace, Grover and edibles. Plus tons more, including our friend Rick Feelsmen. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

The Bears had the week off but the NFL rolled on, with most local fans focusing on the Panthers continued cold streak, inching us all closer to the No 1 pick in 2024. People are getting nervous about Jordan Love possibly being really good? Dan returns to the lab this week, as does Rick Feelsmen with his hot hot picks. Bill pays his #hat game debt to Frank, thanks to a disappointing Illini football squad. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

That was a Matt Eberflus masterclass, wasn't it? Are we done with him? I think we're done with him. Justin Fields and the Bears looked pretty good against Super Bowl contender Detroit until that smug bastard had to make some difficult changes. Bill Doinks talks all about it today because Dan is away from the show for holiday reasons this week. Enjoy Bill's dream scenario of what the Bears look like in 2024 plus a bit more, including some original-ish tunes. Plus the Illini are playing for their postseason lives this weekend against the Northwestern Flying Shreks. Happy Thanksgiving to all who celebrate without hens on their table. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

We are hopeful that Justin Fields will be back this week because we are sick of watching Tyson Bagent play (no offense). Dan might have severe diarrhea this episode so stay tuned if that backfires at some point. We wonder about the bedroom activities of the Muppets and their puppeters. Plus much more. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

Dan and Bill do not link up "live" for this episode but we bring you all sorts of audio nuggets to get you oh so hyped for Bears-Panthers. We're getting a little concerned that the Bears are never going to play Justin Fields ever again. Thank you to Rick Feelsmen and Greasetank Frank for your contributions this week. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

Tyson Bagent and the Bears came back to earth on Sunday night against the Chargers but that feels like years ago. We focus more on the acquisition of Montez Sweat from Washington and one of us is very confused about the timing and logic behind it. Plus tons more, including fingering the coach de jour to replace Matt Eberflus as well as another riveting Keep An Eye On Dan. The return of Greasetank for racing nuggets and Rick Feelsmen keeps our eye on the prize for the hottest picks of the weekend. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

The Bears, shockingly, have won two of three, this time coming behind a solid performance by rookie QB Tyson Bagent. Can the Bears make it three of four this Sunday night against the Chargers? Vegas says no. We say .... ? Plus the debut of our coaching segment within a segment, the return of Keep An Eye on Dan, a fresh tune plus tons of surprises along the way. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

With Justin Fields now having a busted right thumb, what more is there to even talk about for the 1-5 Bears? So we decided to not talk too much Bears. Enjoy, maybe? 0:00 - 02:51 - Apologies to Cowboy Junkies. 02:51 - 03:45 - What's on tap tonight? 03:45 - 29:06 - Bears-Vikings Review. Fields is hurt. Bagent is whatever. Do we need to start looking toward 2024? Dan is tested again in Keep An Eye on Dan (11-7 going into tonight). 29:06 - 51:44 - Raiders Preview. Dan walks us through the streets of Las Vegas. 51:44 - 66:01 - Hamm's N Bread. Rick Feelsmen (8-11-3) gives us his hottest three picks of the weekend. 66:01 - 74:16 - Bears Fantasy Corner. Who are the boys going with for this Sunday's Bears-Raiders game? 74:16 - 81:27 - B1G Minute. The Illini stun Maryland. 81:27 - 82:20 - Where can you find us on Cameo? 82:20 - 101:05 - Wrap this M'Fer Up. Dan want to talk about a provocative HBO show. 101:05 - END - Apologies to Smokey Maxwell. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

After nearly a full calendar year of losses, the Bears have finally won a football game and the boys of Zero Doinks don't know what to do with themselves. Is this sustainable? Did Dick Butkus have to die for our sins? We discuss the beauty in Washington and look ahead to the Vikings coming to town on Sunday for what could lead to an actual winning streak. Plus tons more, including Rick Feelsmen's hot picks, an actual minute spent on the Big 10 and surprises left and right. Two new tunes as well. 0:00 - 03:07 - Apologies to Taylor Swift for this one. 03:07 - 05:49 - What's on tap tonight? 05:49 - 32:18 - Bears-Washington and Week 5 Review. 32:18 - 46:30 - Bears-Vikings Preview. 46:30 - 71:18 - Hamm's N Bread. America's Favorite Gambling Segment. 71:18 - 80:13 - Bears Fantasy Corner. 80:13 - 82:36 - B1G Minute. 82:36 - 83:29 - Find us on Cameo. 83:29 - 95:38 - Let's Wrap this M'Fer Up. 95:38 - END - Apologies to Dashboard Confessional. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

I mean, how in the world did the Bears blow that one? Still curious where the next win will come from as a short week awaits this Thursday at a decent Washington squad, led by Jan 6th mastermind in DC Jack Del Rio. This episode is a weird one, apologies in advance. Hope, at the least, you enjoy the intro song courtesy of Doctor Dan Doinks and Daughter of Bill Doinks. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

The sun hasn't come out yet this week as we were reminded that the Bears are a football team that continues to rip out our soul, week after week, year after year. Is there any hope for any of us, being that it's only going into Week 4 of the 2023 season? What are we even hoping for at this point? Is JF1 ruined completely? Is anyone worth keeping around? How are we here already? Plus fun and games such as Keep an Eye on Dan, mischief along the way with Rick Feelsmen and the return of Dipsh!ts and Dipsticks with Greasetank Frank. Plus fresh tunes. 0:00 - 02:55 - Daughter of Bill Doinks doing part of a cinema classic. 02:25 - 04:28 - What's on tap tonight? 04:28 - 26:29 - Bears-Chiefs review, I suppose. Keep An Eye on Dan challenge for Dan Doinks. Apologies to Gayle. 26:29 - 51:41 - Broncos Preview but not really. 51:41 - 72:26 - Hamm's N Bread (America's Favorite Gambling Segment). Rick Feelsmen pops in for his hot hot picks. 72:26 - 79:56 - Bears Fantasy Corner. 79:56 - 99:19 - B1G Minute. 99:19 - 100:12 - Support Zero Doinks on Cameo. 100:12 - 114:59 - Dipsh!ts + Dipsticks with GreaseTank Frank. 114:59 - 125:25 - Let's Wrap this M'Fer Up. 125:25 - END - Compliments to Phoebe Bridgers, Darren's child, Daughter of Bill Doinks full version of a cinema classic. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

As Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs await our 0-2 Bears, some tough questions have to be pondered. One of us is ready to take a stand on something, one of us is not. We do not spend too much time on the Bucs game and instead move onto the next opponent who we hope to god the Bears can actually hang with and not embarrass the whole fandom for once. Lots of surprises along the way and hopefully some entertainment for your ears as we continue to hope for the best but expect the worst. 0:00 - 03:04 - Apologies to The Basement Tapes and Bob Dylan for the cover song. 03:04 - 04:36 - What's on tap tonight 04:36 - 36:30 - Bears-Bucs and NFL Review. 36:30 - 56:43 - Chiefs Preview. 56:43 - 74:16 - Hamm's N Bread. 74:16 - 82:12 - Bears Fantasy Corner. 82:12 - 95:36 - B1G Minute. 95:36 - END - Let's Wrap this M'Fer Up and Outro Music. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

As much as we'd love to ignore the Bears-Packers Week 1 game, and whatever Luke Getsy drew up after months of preperation, we'll talk about it, but we'll focus more on our experience regarding the joint-smoking professional chef next to us at the tailgate, and other observations. After another contest of 'Keep An Eye on Dan," focus switches quickly to Tampa, which has a guy from an incredibly-named New York town that you just have to hear. Rick Feelsmen offers more expert gambling advice in Hamm's N Spreads, and the boys dive deep into your best Bears fantasy picks in Bears Fantasy Corner. Plus the Illini host the Nittany Lions this weekend in Champaign and the Gophers travel to future top draft pick Sam May (I might have that wrong) and his Tar Heels. Lots of fun along the way as we shake off this miserable feeling. 0:00 - 02:31 - Apologies to the estate of Kurt Cobain and his Nirvana bretheren. 02:23 - 03:41 - What's on tap tonight? 03:41 - 40:08 - What was our experience like in the stadium for Chicago-Green Bay? How do we feel days later? Did either of us watch the game back? Did the tailgater next to us make it home alive? We saw some red flags in the stadium before kickoff. Does Dan Doinks (0-3) finally win at Keep An Eye on Dan? 40:08 - 63:10 - Tampa Preview. Dan attempts to take us through a mental trip of Tampa, Florida, but somehow we end up in Upper New York. 63:10 - 86:38 - Hamm's N Bread. Rick Feelsmen (1-2) pops in for expert gambling advice. What games catch our eye this week? 86:38 - 94:06 - Bears Fantasy Corner. The boys (0-0-1) battle for fantasy supremacy this week with their hot picks against Tampa. 94:03 - 94:56 - Have some cash to burn? Order a Zero Doinks Cameo. 94:56 - 107:23 - Big Ten Minute. Bill Doinks will be in the house this week for Illini-Penn State. The Gophers travel to North Carolina in a tough non-conference battle. 107:23 - END - A little Cubs and Toffees talk plus have the ghosts returned in Dan's house? --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

The excuses are over, Rodgers no longer can hurt us, it is time for the Bears and Packers to switch roles after 14 years of beatings. Week 1 is finally here and our pants are involuntarily flying off our bodies thinking about what the trajectory of this team could be once they get rolling. Come with us for the ride. 00:00 - 02:45 - Compliments and apologies to Pearl Jam. 02:45 - 05:12 - What's on tap tonight? 05:12 - 37:17 - Bears Chatter. How do we feel about the roster. What is our Justin Fields confidence meter at. What is our final prediction for the 2023 record. Maybe we need to Keep An Eye on Dan? 37:17 - 59:49 - Green Bay Preview. Dan Doinks attempts to walk us through the streets of Green Bay, Wisconsin, but this goes sideways thanks to recent deaths of Jimmy Buffet and Smash Mouth guy. 59:49 - 98:09 - Hamm's N Bread. America's favorite gambling segment returns with Rick Feelsmen. We will try and win you some cash this year. We actually talk about the Bears-Packers game here. 98:09 - 103:41 - Bears Fantasy Corner. Who are our top picks to win you your W1 fantasy game? 103:41 - 104:33 - Find us on Cameo. Hire us to roast your best friends and family members. 104:33 - 119:48 - B1G Minute. The Illini are still on pace to win the 2023 national championship. Gophers survive W1 against Nebraska. 119:48 - END - Wrap the M'Fer Up. Baseball chatter. Toffees Corner. Tailgate talk leading into an incredible song by Rick Feelsmen. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support

A mixed bag for the Bears this preseason as they head into Saturday's finale against Buffalo. Two straight years of preseason injuries on the offensive line, including the recurring theme of a ding-y Teven Jenkins, leading us to wonder what's next? Roster cut down date is a week away and the Bears find themselves with a good problem to have at Edge and QB. By the time you hear from us again, the college football season will have kicked off, including some hot and steamy B1G action, so let's project where our Illini and Gophers are going to land in 2023. Random Pee Wee and Jim Abbott talk for no real reason as well. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/message Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/zerodoinks/support