Pure Sex Radio

What does "waking up" look like for a husband who is recovering from sexual sin habits? And how can this waking up cause him to respond radically different to his wife and marriage? In this episode, we get to share a "thank you" letter that a repentant husband wrote to his wife, and what his words can reveal about the kinds of changes that need to happen in a husband if restoration is even to be possible.Excerpt from the letter:"Thank you for fighting for me, for yourself, for us. Even today you are still trying to save me. I fought you, I fought God, I fought myself. I hurt me, I hurt you, I hurt the heart of God. Through it all, you never stopped fighting for me. How can I thank you?"For the full text of the letter, go to TYLetter.PureSexRadio.com. Resources for Men: Men.Bebroken.comResources for Wives: WivesCare.Bebroken.comSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

All of us have a broken emotional system. There are many factors that contribute to such brokenness. And friends and family might recognize this brokenness, but how can they help you see this brokenness for yourself? In this episode, we offer specific insights and practical tools to help your loved ones see their brokenness so that greater intimacy and emotional health can result. We hope this conversation will open new chapters of emotional intimacy in your most valued relationships.Book: Untangling Emotions by Groves and SmithSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Register for Xposed Conference!When: THIS Saturday, February 24th (join in person or online)Xposed is an annual event to help pastors, ministry leaders, counselors, and individuals navigate sensitive sexual issues and equip them to care for their communities regarding God’s design for sex.Register Online (use coupon code XP24-BBM for discount)-----------Many men struggle deeply with their godly responsibilities of leadership, especially in the home, because they aren’t even managing themselves very well. In this episode, Stephen brings a letter from a leader that is meant to be representative of most men who struggle with this internal conflict of leadership calling and poor self-management. This letter addresses issues like: Dividedness and hypocrisyWearing masks to cover fear and shamePoor or non-existent emotional skillsWeariness and hopelessnessFor any man who can relate to what is shared in this letter, there is hope for transformation. You can become the man and leader God designed you to be. For helpful resources to enhance your godly manhood and marriage skills, visit DoctorMarriage.org.More Resources:Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive49 Days of Growth by Stephen Cervantes*Daily Thoughts from Doctor MarriageRelated Podcasts:Helping Men Navigate Between Logic and EmotionA 7 Day Challenge for Emotional GrowthAre You Open or Closed to Emotional Growth*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Today’s guest is Matt Wenger, the clinical director of Boulder Recovery in Boulder, Colorado. Matt has a heart for helping men overcome all kinds of unwanted sexual behaviors by addressing the whole man, including trauma from his past. In today’s episode, we talk about recovery as a means and environment for addressing all aspects of a man: his emotions, spirit, intellect, and body. True recovery is far more than just stopping negative behaviors; it is addressing the overall person to affect healthy personal growth and loving relationships. Matt shares common elements that often lead a man toward sexually compulsive behaviors and how to heal and discover a thriving life of freedom and joy. To learn more about Matt and their programs and resources, visit BoulderRecovery.com.More Resources:Sexual Integrity Webinar for MenMen.Bebroken.com40 Days of Purity Online CourseRelated Podcasts:Why Men Struggle to LoveOvercoming Shame and Embracing Your True IdentityRecovery by the Power of God's Word----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

In this episode, we have Andrew Arthur back with us to dive deep into the art of active listening. We chat about the common obstacles we face, like distractions and assumptions, that can disrupt our ability to truly hear others, especially in long-term relationships. Andrew shares a golden nugget for exceptional listening: asking "What do you need from me right now?" as a way to better support those in emotional need. We even touch on how this skill translates to our spiritual lives, suggesting we quiet our inner chatter to connect with God. Wrapping up, we leave you with some practical tips to enhance your listening skills.To learn more about Andrew and his mediation services, visit GenesisChristianMediation.com. Topics Covered in this Episode: Importance of active listeningRoadblocks to effective communicationRemoving oneself from the center stageAsking "What do you need from me right now?"Providing support and affirmation in times of crisisAssumptions in long-term relationshipsBarriers to good listeningListening to God and spiritual connectionPractical advice for improving listening skillsMore Resources:Untangling Emotions* by Groves and SmithWords Have Power40 Days to Oneness by Stephen CervantesRelated Podcasts:Conflict Management for Marriage Healing from BetrayalDo Your Emotional Beliefs Lead You to Connection or Disconnection?The Goal is Connecting*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

On today’s episode, Brian Ellsworth shares his personal journey of trauma, addiction, and recovery. Brian is the new executive director of Living Without Lust, which is a fellowship of men desiring to live with sexual integrity.Brian discusses his challenging past, sobriety-seeking turning points, and healing through an intensive program. He shares how he went from a crippling addiction to now helping other men break free from unwanted sexual behaviors. The conversation stresses the significance of addressing underlying pain, seeking help, and the continuous process of recovery. To learn more about Brian and Living Without Lust, visit LivingWithoutLust.com. More Resources:Contact Brian at 904-479-5629 Boulder RecoveryGateway to FreedomRelated Podcasts:A 3-Year Roadmap of Recovery and Emotional GrowthKeys to Long-Term Freedom from Unwanted Sexual BehaviorsHelping Men Overcome Porn and Get Emotionally Fit----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

In this episode, we welcome back Ashley Jameson from Pure Desire Ministries. She helps us understand trauma, addiction, and women's struggles with sex and relationships, shining a light on the importance of transforming our worldly views on sexuality.Ashley candidly highlights the different ways women grapple with their sexuality. Ranging from matters of toxic relationships to fears of intimacy, her insights and personal journey resonate deeply.Ashley also explores the negative impact of violent sexual acts in fantasies and media content. She emphasizes the urgent need to redefine our perspective of sexuality as a beautiful and valuable gift from God.As a wrap-up, Ashley speaks on the far-reaching positive impacts of breaking free from sexual shame on all aspects of life, notably parenting and personal relationships. This powerful conversation will invite women dealing with love, sex, and relationship issues to boldly embark on their individual healing journeys.To learn more about Ashley and the resources mentioned in this episode, visit PureDesire.org. More Resources:Unraveled KitCounseling HelpFind a GroupRelated Podcasts:God's Grace for Women Struggling with Sexual ShameGoing Deeper for Women: How Your Inner Child Affects Your Love and Sex AddictionFreedom and Healing from Shame, Addiction, and Abuse----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

The world, especially in the West, is awash in all forms of sexual brokenness and confusion. And much of this brokenness and confusion is present in the Church. How can we help Christians understand God’s design for sex and live it out in our local churches and communities?Today we have Daniel Weiss back on the program with us to discuss these issues. Daniel is the president of Sexual Integrity Leaders, a ministry dedicated to equipping, supporting, and collaborating with Christian leaders to promote Gospel-centered sexuality in the Church.Much of our conversation revolves around the Identity Project, a platform containing many teaching videos from multiple leaders in various arenas of expertise regarding biblical sexuality. We talk about why these teachings are important for every Christian, especially topics like the “image of God,” singlehood and sexuality, and how our true identity is rooted in community.To learn more about Daniel and Sexual Integrity Leaders, visit SexualIntegrityLeaders.com. To learn more about the Identity Project, visit IdentityProject.tv. Use coupon code: IDPSEXUALINTEGRITY10More Resources:Rethinking Sexuality* by Dr. Juli SlatteryOur Bodies Tell God's Story* by Christopher WestPure Life Academy Courses for LeadersRelated Podcasts:What is Sexual Discipleship?Being a Single, Sexual ManEmbracing God's Image in Gender*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Addiction recovery is hard work. It is the process of learning to live in a whole new way apart from old, harmful, compulsive patterns. Such transformation doesn’t happen quickly or without help. Our guest today is Mark Denison. He has been on the program several times before and is the co-founder, with his wife Beth, of There’s Still Hope. He joins us to talk about his newest book, Recovery Rules: 100 Truisms that Will Change Everything. Men often need pithy, wise tips to help them on the long road of recovery. In our conversation, we highlight several of the truisms, such as: If you are 90% in, you are 100% out.Addiction isn’t a bad problem, it is a bad solution.If you can stay sober for 20 minutes, you can stay sober.Relapse is not an event, but a process.Don’t commit to a lifetime; commit to a day.Direction trumps destination.If you are looking for some super practical help for your recovery journey, this episode will be very impactful. To learn more about Mark and his ministry’s resources, visit TheresStillHope.org. More Resources: Recovery Rules: 100 Truisms that Will Change Everything*Gateway to Freedom 3-Day IntensiveGrace-Based Recovery Online Study GroupsRelated Podcasts:A 3-Year Roadmap of Recovery and Emotional GrowthThe Stopwatch Acting Out Cycle3 Levels of Sobriety*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Forgiveness is a topic that gets brought up over and over again in the space of healing from betrayal. But before you tune out let me encourage you to stick around for my super practical conversation with Karla Downing on this topic.Karla is the founder of Change My Relationship and has been on the podcast multiple times to help us think through important relational issues like boundaries and grief. Her many years of experience helping couples in very difficult situations comes out in this interview on forgiveness.In the episode, Karla gives a robust definition of forgiveness and then walks us through eight practical steps that are essential to the process of forgiveness.To learn more about Karla and her ministry, visit ChangeMyRelationship.com.More Resources:The 8-Step Forgiveness Process (PDF)30 Days of Blessing (PDF)Healing the Wounds of Your PastRelated Podcasts:Betrayal Healing PhasesThe 7 Steps of ForgivenessThe Journey of Healing from Betrayal Trauma----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Why is confidence important to recovery from addictive patterns? And how is confidence different from arrogance or pride? To help us address this topic, we have Dr. Eddie Capparucci back on the program with us. Eddie is certified as a licensed professional counselor and certified in treating sexual and pornography addiction. He has been on the program multiple times to share his expertise and wisdom in the field of addiction recovery. In our conversation, we discuss what confidence is, the causes and effects of a lack of confidence, what healthy confidence is rooted in, and how to grow in confidence. If you are a man who wants to grow and mature in your recovery, take notes and apply what Eddie shares in this episode. To learn more about Eddie and his resources, visit InnerChild-SexAddiction.com.More Resources: Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensiveGoing Deeper: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Sexual Addiction*Grace-Based Recovery GroupsRelated Podcasts:Helping Men Navigate Between Logic and EmotionWhat To Do in the Moment of TemptationWhy Men Struggle to Love*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

There are many men and women in the Church who struggle with all forms of sexual brokenness, including same-sex sexual desires. How can Christians love and care for those who want freedom from such besetting sins?In today’s episode, our guest is Garry Ingraham. Garry is the co-founder of Love and Truth Network, a ministry that equips church leaders in restoring biblical sexuality, community, and identity through personalized leadership training, teaching resources, and experiential growth opportunities for personal transformation and supporting others. Garry shares his own story of same-sex brokenness and how God drew him out of the dark and into the light. He also shares how God called him into ministry, especially to pastors and helping them with their personal sexual struggles and how to address sexual sin and hope in the local church. Finally, Garry has a new book entitled Am I Gay which highlights his story and how to navigate sexual confusion with the truth of Christ and the community of fellow Christians. To learn more about Garry, his ministry, and the book, visit LoveandTruthNetwork.com. More Resources:Am I Gay book*The Love and Truth Network PodcastFree Confidential CoachingRelated Podcasts:Can the Church Be a Safe Place for Healing and Transformation?What To Do When Your Child "Comes Out"How Brokenness Fits with Wholeness in Christ*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Why is pornography such a big deal? This is a common question in the culture, but not necessarily one of alarm, but rather questioning why ministries like ours and many others even exist. Is there any real harm to pornography?To help us answer these questions we have Nick Stumbo back on the program. Nick is the Executive Director of Pure Desire Ministries and an author and speaker on sexual issues from a Christian worldview. In our conversation, Nick shares many of the negative effects of porn: biological, mental, emotional, and relational. We look at the many unhealthy patterns porn promotes, the natural trajectory of tolerance (both individually and culturally), the linkage between human trafficking and porn, and then how to live free from the negative effects of porn. Finally, Nick shares a new video series resource called Living Undefiled that takes an in-depth look at the topics surrounding pornography and human trafficking. To learn more about Nick and Pure Desire, visit PureDesire.org. To get access to the Living Undefiled course, visit LivingUndefiled.com. More Resources:Help for MenHelp for Women*NCOSERelated Podcasts:New Research on Why Women View PornExposing the True Impact of PornKeeping Kids Safe in a Digital World*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Sometimes we don’t have a “topic” for the podcast, but instead simply have a conversation with someone with loads of experience and wisdom in sexual struggles and recovery. This is what today’s episode is all about.Our guest is author and speaker, Nate Larkin. He founded the Samson Society, a fellowship of Christian men who are serious about authenticity, community, humility, and recovery. In our conversation, Nate shares his own story of addiction and recovery. Then we dive into lots of questions that draw on his decades of personal and ministerial wisdom that will prove helpful to any man listening who wants to break free from unwanted sexual behaviors. To learn more about Nate and his ministry, visit SamsonSociety.com. More Resources:Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensiveSamson and the Pirate Monks*Find a Samson MeetingRelated Podcasts:Men Helping Men Grow and MatureThe Importance of "Whole Man" Recovery3 Levels of Sobriety*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

How important is trust to emotional health and building strong, mature relationships? It is vital! Yet, many men we have served in our ministry struggle terribly with trust. In today’s episode, Stephen and I are going to dig into this important topic of trust through the lens of one man’s story that begins with him not being able to trust his parents with his thoughts and feelings and ends with him finally living a “love plus trust” story. We will share the distinction between love and trust and how love plus trust takes us even deeper than love alone. We need to learn how to understand trust in its multilayered dimensions if we want to enjoy strong, healthy relationships.For resources from Stephen to help you grow and mature emotionally, visit DoctorMarriage.org.More Resources:40 Days to OnenessGrowth Map: The Pathway to Peace, Rest, and Joy*Untangling Emotions by Groves & Smith*Related Podcasts:Men Helping Men Grow and MatureHealing Steps to Rebuild TrustWhy Men Struggle to Love*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Albert Bandura was a psychologist who is credited with developing the term “human agency,” which refers to how you act, think, and interact with life.In this episode, Stephen and I will unpack the four functions of agency and how they might help us develop better self-awareness and deeper faith and relationships. The 4 functions of agency are: Intentions (or intentionality)Outcomes (or expectations)Self-regulationSelf-reflectionAgency asks, “Are you paying attention to your own intentions and are you getting better at self-regulating and self-reflecting?’ We hope this conversation will help you understand yourself and others better – and use your agency for good, godly purposes.To learn more about Albert Bandura and his research, visit AlbertBandura.com.More Resources:Untangling Emotions by Groves & Smith*Growth Map: The Pathway to Peace, Rest & Joy by Stephen Cervantes*APEST Spiritual Gifts TestRelated Podcasts:Why Must I Learn Me?Understanding 4 Key Roles in Your StoryAbout Your Emotional Connecting Skills*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Every Christian knows that forgiveness is central to salvation and restoration to God. But what does forgiveness look like between us and those who have hurt us?Our guests today are Bruce and Toni Hebel, founders of Forgiving Forward, a ministry that helps people experience the freedom of the gospel through the power of forgiveness. They share their own journey of learning the hard way how vital forgiveness is to personal character and health, as well as effective ministry to others. In our conversation, Bruce and Toni define forgiveness, explain why Christ is the only one who can pay the full debt of sin and wounds, expose the roots of unforgiveness, the common obstacles to forgiveness, and ultimately how to forgive in real-life situations of betrayal and pain through 5 key protocols:GRATITUDE for God’s forgiveness of me.REPENT of my sin of unforgiveness. WHO do I forgive and for WHAT?FORGIVE each offense from my HEART.Ask God to BLESS them and look for ways to bless them when possible.To learn more about Bruce and Toni’s ministry and to get their book, visit ForgivingForward.com.More Resources: Forgiving Forward book*FAQ: How to ForgiveFAQ: How to Help Others ForgiveRelated Podcasts:The 7 Steps of ForgivenessBetrayal Healing PhasesGrace to Forgive*This is an affiliate link. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Did you know that 58% of women who struggle with porn were exposed to porn before age 12? Or that 93% of women who struggle with porn never attend a support group? And that 48% of women viewing porn were a victim of sexual abuse?Our guest today is Crystal Renaud Day, a coach, author, and speaker – and the founder and executive director of SheRecovery.com. She has been a leading voice for women in this space of sexual integrity ministry since 2009. Recently, Crystal and her ministry conducted research to answer the question “What Drives Women to Porn?” There were over 1300 anonymous female participants, ages 18 to 65+ from 58 countries, who had used or been addicted to pornography in the past or present. This episode discusses the findings of this research and why this is important to women struggling and those who love them. To see the research and results, visit SheRecovery.com. More Resources:LivingOnPurposeKC.comBeggarsDaughter.comSexual Shame in Women and How to Experience Freedom*Related Podcasts:Total Freedom for Women Struggling with PornGod's Grace for Women Struggling with Porn and Sexual ShameFreedom and Healing from Shame, Addiction, and Abuse*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Lots of men over the years have shared the sentiment of the following statement: “I’m good as long as I can stay out of my own head.” As we have unpacked this idea with the men who have shared this, there have been four key thoughts that typically keep guys from feeling safe within their own minds.In today’s episode, Stephen and I are going to share these four thoughts. They are: ShameOld StoriesCore FearUnhealthy FantasiesWhen you can understand how these thoughts operate and how to combat them, you can reclaim that territory in your mind for hope, peace, and joy.For helpful "daily thoughts" on emotional health and growth, visit DoctorMarriage.org. More Resources: Growth Map by Stephen Cervantes*Identity: What Foundation Are You Building On?*Gateway to Freedom 3-Day Intensive for MenRelated Podcasts:How to Be at Peace in AlonenessOvercoming Shame and Embracing Your True Identity50 Things To Do When Your Core Fear Gets Triggered*These are affiliate links. Be Broken may earn a commission on qualifying purchases.----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations

Originally Aired on March 7, 2023View this episode on Youtube----------Today’s episode is getting back to the basics of living a life of sexual integrity. Stephen Cervantes and I have been working with men desiring greater integrity for over 20 years, and we know that a life of integrity is not static. You must be on a daily growth mission to mature. In our conversation, we share some of our personal growth tips and many other insights we have seen that help men get on a growth mission and discover their God-sized purpose in life.A great next step in your pursuit of greater integrity is our Gateway to Freedom 3-day intensive workshop. This Friday-Sunday event will help you get down to the roots of your unwanted sexual behaviors and provide practical, powerful direction for living each day with integrity and purpose. Learn more about Gateway to Freedom and how to register at Bebroken.org/gtf.More Resources:FREE Integrity Webinar for Men40 Days of Purity for MenThe 4 Pillars of PurityRelated Podcasts:Keys to Long-Term Freedom from Unwanted Behaviors3 Levels of SobrietyInsights and Action Steps for Men----------Please rate and review our podcast: Apple PodcastsSubscribe to our YouTube channel.Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/pure-sex-radio/donations