Legally Clueless

You finally sit down with your tea. Then you answer one message, remember something you need to order, and by the time you take a sip, it’s cold.On this week’s Mid Week Tease, Adelle Onyango asks what happens when we get so used to making time for everyone else that our own plans are always the easiest ones to move. From her morning walks in Limuru to the guilt that can show up the minute you sit down, Adelle explores how to make room for rest, pleasure and the things that make you feel like yourself.In this episode, we get into:Why being the woman everyone can count on can make it harder to protect your own time.How even a short break between tasks can help with fatigue.Why having a say in how you spend your time matters for your wellbeing.How to practise savouring and actually enjoy the good parts of an ordinary day.When making space for yourself means asking someone else to take a turn.Your invitation this week is to pick one moment in your day and decide how you’d like to spend it. A slow breakfast, a call with a friend, or your favourite pudding on a Wednesday. The pudding is a plan. Shop the Mannerless candles Creamy Vanilla and Brown Sugar are now available online. ⁠https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/shop⁠ Research mentioned in this episodeShort breaks, energy and fatigue — ⁠https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36044424/⁠Autonomy and daily wellbeing — ⁠https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/38801220/⁠Savouring and positive emotions — ⁠https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35386887/

In the final part of Daughtie's extraordinary story, we discover how a young woman who lost so much went on to build a life she once could only dream of.After surviving childhood abuse, homelessness, violent relationships and the challenges of young motherhood, Daughtie found an unexpected opportunity volunteering at an NGO in Mombasa.That opportunity would change the course of her life.In this episode, Daughtie shares how she returned to education, discovered her passion for human rights advocacy and went on to become a founding member and the first Executive Director of the African Sex Workers Alliance. She also opens up about finding love, experiencing devastating loss, raising her children and the remarkable moment she discovered a letter she'd written to her future self, only to realize how many of her dreams had come true.Daughtie's story reminds us that our past does not have to determine the limits of our future, and that sometimes, one person believing in us can change everything. This is Part 3 of Daughtie's story. Listen to Parts 1 and 2 first for the full journey. IN THIS EPISODE:Finding purpose through lived experienceReturning to education as an adultBuilding a movement for sex workers' rights across AfricaNavigating love, grief and motherhoodThe power of opportunity, community and believing in your dreamsSOMETHING MANNERLESS IS COMING!We've been working on something special for our community! Keep an eye on our socials this Tuesday for the big Mannerless announcement.CONNECT WITH LEGALLY CLUELESS AFRICA Follow us on Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/⁠ Follow us on TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica⁠ Want to share your story on the Legally Clueless Podcast? Submit your story here: ⁠https://forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8⁠ Visit our website and subscribe to our weekly newsletter: ⁠https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/ ⁠ LISTEN TO MORE STORIES Catch up on previous episodes of the Legally Clueless Podcast wherever you get your podcasts.If Daughtie's story moved you, share it with someone who needs a reminder that their circumstances don't have to define their future. #LegallyClueless #AfricanStories

Are you being too hard on yourself because your life isn't moving as quickly as you'd hoped?There are three seasons we experience in life: planting, nurturing and reaping. But sometimes, we expect ourselves to be harvesting when we've only just planted the seeds.This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle Onyango explores how to recognise the season you're in, give yourself grace through the uncertainty, and protect your energy while building the life you want.In this episode, we unpack:Why comparing your beginnings to another woman's success can leave you feeling behind.How to embrace being a beginner without demanding immediate results.Why invisible progress still matters, especially during the nurturing season.The difference between nurturing your dreams and exhausting yourself trying to force them to grow.How to conserve your emotional, mental and physical energy.Why learning to enjoy your harvest is just as important as working towards it.Five reflective questions to help you honour your current season.Share your reflections in the comments. CONNECT WITH LEGALLY CLUELESS AFRICAInstagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/⁠Website: ⁠https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/⁠ CONNECT WITH ADELLE ONYANGOInstagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/adelleonyango/⁠ Subscribe to the Legally Clueless Africa newsletter for thoughtful reflections, practical resources and conversations about navigating life as a woman.New episodes of The Mid Week Tease every Wednesday.

She Lost Her Parents, Her Home & Had to Fight to Survive Part 2 What happens when survival means making choices you never imagined you'd have to make?In Part 2 of Daughtie's story on the Legally Clueless podcast, we follow her journey into young adulthood as she navigates abusive relationships, exploitation, pregnancy, sex work and the difficult realities of trying to build a life without a stable support system. After a childhood marked by loss, rejection and abuse, Daughtie finds herself in relationships that expose her to even more harm. She shares the circumstances that shaped her decisions, the people who offered her refuge when she needed it most, and the challenges she faced as she eventually became a mother. Her story challenges us to look beyond the choices women make and consider the circumstances in which those choices were made.Because sometimes, what looks like a choice from the outside is really someone doing whatever they can to survive. Content Advisory: This episode contains discussions of domestic violence, sexual exploitation, abortion and abusive relationships. Please listen with care. FOR MANNERLESS WOMEN LIVE : ACT 1 IS OUT NOW!Our very first For Mannerless Women Live experience is officially streaming on Spotify!In Act 1, we're joined by incredible women in their 30s for honest, hilarious and powerful conversations about body image, sexuality, identity, societal expectations and embracing womanhood on our own terms.Catch Act 1 on our Legally Clueless Spotify channel:⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2v054M3Y0dW2Ef8l6mR0wM⁠ STAY CONNECTED WITH LEGALLY CLUELESS AFRICASubscribe to our newsletter and discover more from our network: ⁠https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/⁠Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/⁠TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica⁠YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/c/LegallyCluelessYoutube⁠ SHARE YOUR STORY WITH USHave a story you'd love to share on the Legally Clueless podcast? We'd love to hear from you!Submit your story here: ⁠https://forms.gle/JMrQD55jcrazKFKX7⁠ COMING NEXT MONDAYIn Part 3, we follow Daughtie as she begins rebuilding her life, discovers the world of advocacy, returns to education and creates opportunities she once could only dream of.Don't miss the final chapter of her extraordinary story. #LegallyClueless #LegallyCluelessAfrica #AfricanStories #SurvivorStories

She Lost Her Parents, Her Home & Had to Fight to Survive | Daughtie's Story (Part 1) What happens when the people who are supposed to protect you become the very people who hurt you? In this episode of the Legally Clueless podcast, we meet Daughtie, whose extraordinary story of survival begins with a childhood marked by loss, sexual abuse, rejection and instability. After losing her parents, Daughtie finds herself moving between relatives' homes, searching for safety and belonging. But instead of receiving the care and protection every child deserves, she encounters betrayal, mistreatment and circumstances that force her to grow up far too quickly. In Part 1 of this three-part story, Daughtie opens up about the experiences that shaped her childhood, the devastating consequences of being failed by the adults around her, and what it means to lose not just your home, but your sense of safety. This is a story that challenges us to think about how we protect vulnerable children, the lasting impact of childhood trauma, and the importance of compassion. Content Advisory: This episode contains discussions of childhood sexual abuse, grief, neglect and mistreatment. Please listen with care. COMING THIS THURSDAY: FOR MANNERLESS WOMEN LIVE!Starting October 22nd, we're bringing our very first For Mannerless Women Live experience to the Legally Clueless Spotify channel!Join us for powerful, honest and hilarious conversations with women in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond, exploring the different seasons of womanhood.Listen and follow us on Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2v054M3Y0dW2Ef8l6mR0wM⁠ STAY CONNECTED WITH LEGALLY CLUELESS AFRICASubscribe to our newsletter: ⁠https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/⁠Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/⁠TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica⁠YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/c/LegallyCluelessYoutube⁠ SHARE YOUR STORY WITH USHave a story you'd love to share on the Legally Clueless podcast? We'd love to hear from you!Submit your story here: ⁠https://forms.gle/JMrQD55jcrazKFKX7⁠ Part 2 of Daughtie's story comes out next Monday. Make sure you're following the podcast so you don't miss it! #LegallyClueless #LegallyCluelessAfrica #AfricanStories #ChildhoodTrauma #SurvivorStories