The Successful Invisible

In episode 10, Janelle explores some red flags and toxic dating behaviors that recently came up during client sessions and doing a holiday gathering with friends. She breaks down why each of the specific items is either a red flag or a toxic dating behavior and the underlying implications of the person who’s expressing those behaviors. Tune in as Janelle helps the listeners to greater understanding of these behaviors, whether you are the person acting them out or entertaining them from others, then this is the episode for you! Download link to my worksheet Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thesuccessfulinvisible/message In This Episode: ● [3:48 ] Toxic dating behavior – Hobosexual ● [5:34 ] Red Flag - Guy says he's the "nice guy" ● [7:42 ] Toxic Dating Behavior & Reg Flag - Any Emotional Manipulation ● [8:44 ] Toxic Dating Behavior & Reg Flag - Asking someone "what they bring to the table” ● [10:52 ] Toxic Dating Behavior & Reg Flag - Giving Ultimatums ● [11:40] Time Parameters vs. Giving Ultimatums ● [12:21 ] Inability to handle someone disagreeing with them or rejection ● [14:54 ] Questions for Reflection ● [17:22 ] Just My Thoughts Relationship Shifting Quotes: ● “Men have been taught many dating and courtship behaviors that are predatory.” ● “Women have been taught many dating and courtship behaviors that are toxic.” --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

What are attachment styles and how do they affect relationships? In episode 9, Janelle explores various attachment styles and how they can impact relationships. She explains how attachment styles form and how they are often irrevocably a part of us. In detail, she explains four different attachment styles and how they manifest themselves in personal behaviors, interpersonal relations, and romantic relationships. Janelle offers listeners a chance to test themselves, in order to better understand how their attachment styles are manifested into their daily lives. Lastly, she confesses her own attachment style, how she’s learned from it, and how she approaches new and old relationships because of it. Tune in as Janelle discusses the importance of identifying others’ and one’s own attachment style and how it can affect our relationships, both romantic and otherwise. Download link to my worksheet Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thesuccessfulinvisible/message In This Episode: ● [ 1:33 ] What attachment styles are and how they form ● [ 2:40 ] The four attachment styles ● [ 3:35 ] The inspiration for today’s episode ● [ 4:05 ] Attachment Style 1: Secure ● [ 5:48 ] Takeaways of the secure attachment style ● [ 6:16 ] Attachment Style 2: Avoidant ● [ 8:18 ] Takeaways of the avoidant attachment style ● [ 8:52 ] Attachment Style 3: Anxious and Preoccupied ● [ 10:23 ] Takeaways of the anxious/preoccupied attachment style ● [ 11:45 ] Attachment Style 4: Disorganized/Fearful Avoidance ● [ 13:06 ] Takeaways of the disorganized/fearful avoidance ● [ 14:45 ] Understanding more about one’s own attachment style ● [ 17:28 ] Janelle’s personal thoughts on attachment styles Relationship Shifting Quotes: ● “When secure people date, they look for consistency and reciprocal investment.” ● “Avoidant attachment style individuals like to keep a relationship shallow and on surface level.” ● “People with an anxious attachment style often worry about rejection and abandonment.” ● “A lot of a person’s self-worth or sense of self-worth rests on how they feel they are being treated in a relationship.” ● “It’s about allowing everyone to enter on equal footing and allow people to show you who they are.” --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

In episode 8, Janelle explores the five love languages and how we can improve our relationships by understanding our own love languages as well as our partners’. She goes into detail about the different love languages and ways you can show love for each type. Janelle also gives you advice on how you can have more open, honest conversations about your love languages with your partner in order to better understand and appreciate each other. Janelle shares some reflective questions you can ask yourself to better show and receive love with your partner using love languages. Tune in to hear how common communication issues between couples and points of tension could be greatly improved by the further understanding of each other’s love languages. When using them in a way that works for each of you, love languages can increase communication and help you and your partner grow stronger than ever. Download link to my worksheet Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thesuccessfulinvisible/message In This Episode: ● [ 1:44 ] Where the five love languages came from ● [ 2:37 ] What the five love languages are ● [ 3:40 ] Words of affirmation ● [ 4:21 ] Quality time ● [ 5:53 ] Receiving gifts ● [ 6:38 ] Acts of service ● [ 7:42 ] Physical touch ● [ 8:50 ] The importance of communication when it comes to gift giving ● [ 9:38 ] How to find out your love language ● [ 10:38 ] Questions for Reflections ● [ 12:32 ] Just My Thoughts ● [ 17:02 ] How to have open and honest conversations about your love languages with your partner ● [19:34] The universal love language of every woman Relationship Shifting Quotes: ● “You first have to be aware of your own love languages before you can effectively communicate that with others.” ● “The love languages are a very easy way to better understand yourself and as well as your romantic partner when it comes to the subject of love.” ● “If someone doesn’t say thank you, this could be a sign of someone who is ungrateful, selfish, or lacks manners. If any of those apply, you may want to reevaluate who you are choosing to be in a relationship with.” ● “No one should ever be too comfortable to have good manners toward one another.” ● “If you can make a woman feel physically, emotionally, psychologically, and financially safe, there is a very high likelihood she will respond to you in a positive way.” --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

In this special episode, Janelle takes you through her 'Seasons of Connection' Exercise, which is perfect for anyone who gets down on themselves around holidays seasons because of their relationship status; wants more insights into their own feelings when they're in different relationship dynamics; or is ready to do a bit a self-reflection, self-exploration, and make changes as needed. Janelle asks the listener to be honest and dig deep and take the time to reflect about their level of satisfaction when they're Single Dating In a committed relationship After a break-up Download the worksheet & follow this exercise and you will no doubt be in a better place afterwards. Download link to my worksheet  Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thesuccessfulinvisible/message --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

Should you live together before marriage? In episode 7, Janelle explores the idea of living with a significant other. She explains how to assess whether cohabitating with your significant other is the best fit for you. Plus, Janelle dives into why she feels that this style of living is not necessarily a wise choice (hint: your stage in life has an impact on this). Later, Janelle digs into some inquiring questions that can help you learn more about living together and potential questions that you should ask yourself before making such a big decision. Tune in as Janelle describes why living together before you hit certain milestones in life is not the best idea. For it to be successful, the right conversations need to happen, hard questions have to be asked, and transparency needs to be there. Download link to my worksheet Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thesuccessfulinvisible/message In This Episode: [ 1:55 ] The inspiration behind today’s episode [ 3:30 ] How there can be unspoken expectations in the shack game [ 6:05 ] Questions For Reflections [ 9:55 ] Just My Thoughts [ 14:50 ] The importance of having conversations around expectations [ 18:50 ] Why you shouldn’t live with a partner that you can’t be honest with Relationship Shifting Quotes: · “I've seen a lot of men decide to live with their girlfriends just out of convenience.” · “A lot of women live with their significant others as a deposit toward getting married.” · “Two people are going into the same situation with very different expectations and very different motives.” · “Marriage is a formal contract honored by law; it is not just a piece of paper.” · “I do not feel that living together is a good choice when you want to hit certain milestones in life.” --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

In episode 6, Janelle continues to delve into the topic of boundaries, specifically with you or your partner’s family. The complex nature of close familial relationships can make it difficult to establish strong boundaries. It is important to acknowledge that our need for boundaries can change with our relationship status. In this episode, we will explore how to establish new boundaries with family members and what can happen if we don’t. This episode will illustrate ways to effectively implement boundaries using clarity, respect, and reinforcement. Janelle will also address inquiring questions that will help you start to think about what kind of boundaries could benefit you in your relationships. Download link to my worksheet Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book a Discovery Call In this episode: [ 2:28 ] How one of my clients created and enforced boundaries with her partner’s mother [ 7:40 ] Questions For Reflections [ 10:53 ] Just My Thoughts [ 19:30 ] Is your partner using you to assert boundaries with their family members? Relationship Shifting Quotes: “People for the most part don’t like change and that is twice as likely to be the case if it is change that they themselves did not initiate.” “When you don't establish boundaries when you're single, sometimes it can really impact you when you are in a relationship.” “Be mindful if [your partner] is trying to establish boundaries through you.” Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/thesuccessfulinvisible/message --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

How do you approach the establishment of boundaries with friends as an adult? In episode 5, Janelle explores the often unspoken topic of boundaries, specifically with friends and acquaintances. Take time to understand what your friends and acquaintances may be revealing about you or your love life. This episode is perfect for you if you’re wondering where boundaries need to be established, the importance of having boundaries in place, and why unclear boundaries with friends can lead to problems with future romantic partners. Plus, Janelle takes a deep dive into some inquiring questions that can help you learn more about yourself and how you can establish boundaries in your life with friends and acquaintances. Download link to my worksheet Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call In This Episode: [ 1:30 ] You probably have a friend that is reckless with their words and can oftentimes leave you wounded [ 4:20 ] What happens when we don’t establish boundaries with friends [ 10:30 ] Is your friend giving you advice that is actually useful? [ 14:10 ] Questions For Reflections [ 16:50 ] Just My Thoughts Relationship Shifting Quotes: “We all know of the friend who always has something to say about our love life.” “You are potentially inviting people to be disrespectful of you in your space.” “Letting people go is not easy.” “Humans are always pushing boundaries.” “It's very important to have boundaries in place, regardless of if you're in a relationship or not.” --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

In episode 4, Janelle talks about taking a step back and giving an honest look at where you are in terms of being healed from your past relationships. That way, you can move positively into your future relationships. This episode is perfect for anyone who has been through some drama or trauma in past romantic relationships. You can also benefit from this episode if you need help understanding the reasoning behind some of your relationship choices. If you're ready to take an objective look at your past and you want to move forward powerfully, then you're in the right place! Tune in as Janelle reveals the inspiration behind today's episode: the 'situationship' turned marriage that Janelle's close family friend is in today. Download link to the worksheet for today's episode Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call In This Episode: [ 1:55 ] The backstory behind a friends ‘situationship’ turned marriage [ 6:20 ] Questions For Reflections [ 17:35 ] Just My Thoughts Relationship Shifting Quotes: · “Sticking with the facts is very crucial.” · “There are a lot of unhealed people in pretty packages out here in this world.” · “Let men talk because it's actually very rare that men go out and they're allowed to talk.” · “You can ask regular questions and see where someone else is in their healing journey or to see the trauma someone else has.” --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

In this Special Episode, Janelle talks about one of her favorite self-awareness manifestation techniques: Put A Ring On It. This manifestation technique is especially for women marriage-minded and are wondering how to get themselves in the flow of feeling like they are in that fulfilling relationship This technique also allows a person to have a visual representation of the commitment to marriage right in front of them in the privacy of their own home. Places online to get CZ engagement rings & wedding sets: https://www.palmbeachjewelry.com/ https://www.maxinejewelry.com/ https://www.lajerrio.com/ https://www.italojewelry.com/ https://www.diamondnexus.com/ https://www.birkatelyon.com/ Engage with Us Follow on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

In Episode 3, Janelle starts with a very common question: “Are your standards too high?” This episode is for people who want an answer to this question and are struggling with pairing down their list of standards. The inspiration for this episode came from a discussion Janelle recently had with a few friends that are in her same demographic → 35+, educated and professional ladies who are fully self-supporting, independent, etc. Each of them has recently heard that common and awful statement “Maybe if you lower your standards a little you would have more success when it comes to dating” and this triggered a discussion about it. So if you want to dig deeper into standards to understand what they may be revealing about you, this episode is for you! Hint: This mindset can help you with your own self-assessment. Download link to worksheet for Season 1 Episode 3 Follow me on IG @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

In Episode 2, Janelle starts with an intriguing question: “Who pays for the first date?” It all started with a conversation with her sister and ended up as an amazing topic to discuss and help women around the world that have asked themselves this question. Janelle talks about 5 easy questions to help you qualify someone as a dating prospect and exposes why these answers are important to know before dating. During the Questions for Reflection Segment she explains the reason why each question helps you and the different types of answers you can receive and how the answer to one particular question can reveal the mindset of who seems to be interested in you. Highlight: These are easy questions to ask before or after someone asks for your number to help you save time, energy and frustration and to give you insight of how the relationship with that person would go. Download link to worksheet for Season 1 Episode 2 Follow on Instagram @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

In episode 1, Janelle talks about dating, the definition of it, and your standards. Dating has been around for a few centuries, and there are varying degrees of how serious a person might want to take the experience in their life. This episode is perfect for anyone who wants to understand what dating actually looks like. Plus, you'll be able to get clear around your non-negotiables and take a more conscious look at your list of strongly desired characteristics. You'll leave with a better understanding of the importance of flexibility regarding your dating standards. Looking forward, you will have a stronger awareness of the role dating plays in your life. Tune in as Janelle shares her five non-negotiables and explains why physical characteristics should be the standards that you're most flexible about. Download link to worksheet for Season 1 Episode 1 Follow on Instagram @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call In This Episode: [ 1:45 ] What is dating? [ 5:15 ] A list of standards is vital to have when dating [ 6:35 ] Why you need to consider your non-negotiables [ 7:30 ] Questions For Reflections [ 17:45 ] Just My Thoughts Relationship Shifting Quotes: “Dating is different from hanging out because it usually implies the desire to get romantically      involved with another person or persons.” “Dating takes time, money, energy, enthusiasm, and availability at minimum.” “Dating can provide joyful or even loving experiences with the person or persons that you're dating.” “Effective dating can greatly improve your experiences and influence your choices on who you choose to      actually date.” “The list of standards can often be constraining and limiting when not thoroughly considered.” --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

This is my first episode, which is a mini-episode, to let my audience know a little more about me. This podcast is for women (and men) 35+ seeking for “happily ever after” and are also ready to embrace the challenge and journey of dating with more intentionality. In this mini introductory episode, I breakdown the three parts of most of my episodes: The Setup, Questions for Reflection, and Just My Thoughts. Download link to worksheet for the first episode Follow on Instagram @thesuccessfulinvisible Book A Discovery Call --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/thesuccessfulinvisible/message

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