Through the Lens

If God is good, why is there so much suffering in the world? If God is good, why did my babies die? Today we're chatting all things Sunlight in December: A Mother's Story of Finding the Goodness of God in the Storm of Grief with our very own Kristin Hernandez. It's been one month since the book launch, and we're having a conversation about the entire book writing process- from the idea for the book, to challenges and discoveries made while writing it, to where Kristin hopes things will go from here. If you, or someone you're close to, has walked through infertility, miscarriages, and/or the loss of an infant, you'll want to keep a copy of this powerful memoir about death, doubt, and hope; you'll also want to tune into today's episode to discover more about Kristin's heart for the book, and stay for a fun book-themed lightening round to close things out! Get Sunlight in December here Connect with Through the Lens Podcast here

How should we approach counseling as believers? What does the Bible say about counseling and how can we find a counselor that is a good fit? In today's episode, we're sharing our personal experiences with counseling, exploring ways to find a counselor who is a good fit, and providing Biblical encouragement to consider when seeking support. Our hope is to simply encourage you by sharing our own experiences, and even more so, by sharing Biblical wisdom to consider as you assess whether counseling would be a helpful next step for you.

Episode 46 of Through the Lens Podcast is here and today we're chatting all things exercise + fitness! But don't shut this off just yet if you're not much of a fitness enthusiast - we promise there will be some helpful tips in here that we think anyone in grief will find interesting.  In this episode on Moving Through Grief, we share the connection between fitness + grief, what types of fitness formats are recommended for the griever, and what about when you're just not motivated? How about you - are you using movement as a healthy outlet to support your grief journey? For many of us, starting on an exercise regimen after loss can feel uninspiring at best, daunting at worst. On today's episode, we're sharing our personal pre- and post-loss fitness journeys, including how our relationships to fitness have changed in light of our grief.  We also discuss the physical and mental benefits of exercise for the grieving person and share some simple, practical strategies and mindset tips for getting moving again.

We're baaaack!! Hey Through the Lens friends, we definitely went radio silent there for a bit but we are back on the airwaves and kicking things off with a conversation about Grief These Days. Tune in as Kristin and Holly discuss what our grief looks like these days in this pandemic season and 6 years out from the losses of our sons. Everything from counseling to books and what's making us happy these days as we continue to lament, hope, and process our suffering through the lens of the Gospel. In this episode we ask about your counseling experience; email us at throughthelenspodcast@gmail.com or drop us a private message over @throughthelenspodcast on IG. Books mentioned: Holding Onto Hope by Nancy Guthrie Walking Through Fire by Vaneetha Risner When God Weeps by Joni Eareckson Tada

12 losses. That's what mama Christy Miller has lived and learned through, and today we get to hear her story of growing and grieving, clinging to Christ, the hope of heaven, and the joy + peace on THIS side of eternity that can only be provided by way of the Holy Spirit. Christy has 4 living children, with one on the way. She and her husband are advocates for foster + adoption, and her loss journey includes an ectopic pregnancy, blighted ovum, early and late-term miscarriages, IVF + infertility, and lots and lots of grief, joy, hope, pain, and love.  Christy is a close personal friend of mine (Holly) and is a worship leader at a local church here in Virginia Beach, VA. While I'd heard her story before, I found myself speechless + humbled all over again Christy's testimony. "Years ago I would have said, 12? No way, I'm not doing this. But-here I am, and we're on the other side, and yes-there's sadness and there's heartbreak-and there's also been a lot of healing and blessings (that don't wipe away the grief)." Through the Lens Podcast Episode 44: Growing and Grieving with 12x Loss Mama Christy Miller is now available where podcasts are served. Connect with Christy on Instagram @christyleighmiller Hear more from Christy and her husband Daniel via their church Trinity Be sure to connect with us via Facebook or Instagram @throughthelenspodcast. We'd be honored to hear your story.

Holly here-I've had empathy on the mind lately. There's been a lot of horrible things happening in the world lately, in America right now. Between COVID and the brutal killings of Ahmaud Arbery and George Floyd in past few weeks...these are some very big events that, while I am learning, and I fear I don't know enough to effectively speak on a podcast about. But then again, we're not here to have all the answers to be experts on anything other than sharing in our human experiences of suffering and grief and striving to keep our eyes fixed on heaven, on Jesus, the only one who can redeem and restore. So I hope that's what you'll take away from this conversation starter today-that He alone can redeem, and He has chosen us, His church, to be conduits of His grace and truth. And in order to be effective vessels for Gospel hope, especially in times of suffering and grief when hope is most needed, we must seek to grow in empathy. To move from apathy to empathy. So here is a brief overview of how I personally have experienced growth in empathy due to my own personal trials, and how I'm pursuing continued growth in empathy as I grow in learning and love for my neighbors who are different from me. Because, as 1 Corinthians 12 says, if one part of the Body suffers, we all suffer.

Today we get the honor of learning from Kim Erickson, author of Surviving Sorrow: A Mother's Guide to Living With Loss. Kim began following Christ in 2008 after the death of her 3 year old son. She is a lawyer, she lives in Florida with her husband Devin and her son Ethan. As I (Holly) read through Kim's book in preparation for this episode, something that really stuck out to me was in the intro—Kim speaks to the reader-to the grieving mom-and she says something really simple, yet profound. She says, "take my hand. Borrow my hope." In today's interview, Kim does just that. She takes us on a journey of hope that only the restoration of the Gospel can bring. Over 10 years into her grief journey, Kim has so much to offer in sharing her story and the freedom Christ brings to us loss mamas. We chat about anger/angry prayers, the temporary nature of this life, scriptural examples of lament, and a stunning glimpse into heaven provided by her precious son Austin, which ultimately led Kim to begin following Jesus. Tune in today. Borrow Kim's hope, hurting mama. You're not alone in your grief, in your anger, in your hope.  Read Surviving Sorrow Connect with Kim Be sure to connect with us via Facebook or Instagram @throughthelenspodcast. We'd be honored to hear your story.

One of the things that has been the most encouraging to us in our grief has been connecting with others who "get it". People who can link their arms around us, cry with us, pray with us, point us to the truth, all while nodding their heads along with us and saying "me too".  Our grieving experiences have been greatly impacted by so many books, blogs, songs and organizations and we want to share some of our favorites with you! In today's episode, we're sharing some of our favorite grief-related resources...or  "Griefsources"  as we're calling it. We've divided these resources into several categories: books, music, small business, podcasts, nonprofits, and blogs, and we're passing along some of our favorites to you, as well as some of your favorites that you've shared with us! We recorded this episode a few weeks ago, before many of us realized the seriousness of COVID-19 and before a majority of our country went into social isolation. We are thankful that God remains the same even when things feel so uncertain, and we can't think of a better time to share some of our favorite resources with you!  Griefsources links: Books: I Will Carry You by Angie Smith When God Doesn't Fix It by Laura Story The Scars that have Shaped Me Grieve, Create, Believe by Rachel George Even Broken Can Be Beautiful by Sarah Rieke Joy in Suffering by Rosemary Pope Holding Tight to Permanent in a World That's Passing Away by She Reads Truth A Grief Observed by CS Lewis Suffering is Never for Nothing by Elisabeth Elliot The Moon is Always Round by Jonathan Gibson (children's book) Safe in the Arms of God: Truth from Heaven about the Death of a Child by John MacArthur Holding On to Hope by Nancy Guthrie Hearing Jesus Speak into your Sorrow by Nancy Guthrie Walking with God through Pain and Suffering by Tim Keller Elizabeth Prentiss: More Love to Thee by Sharon James Mourning and Dancing study by She Reads Truth Music: Our Song in the Night by Michael Van Patter It is Well by Bethel Music The Rock Won't Move by Vertical Worship It's Quiet Uptown by Hamilton Where I Belong by Switchfoot Podcasts: The Joyful Mourning Podcast The Heart Lessons Podcast Blogs: Scribbles and Crumbs Rachel George Kristin Ironside Kristin Hernandez: Sunlight in December Holly Colonna: Lessons from Benji

As we kick off 2020, we're joined by our friend Rachel George to talk about clinging to God when you don't feel His presence, the unique sorrow of loss upon loss, and processing grief through creativity. Rachel shares her story of miscarriage, losing her 1-month-old son Clive, and losing her 9-day-old daughter just 14 months later. Rachel authentically shares about the ways she wrestled with God and questioned her faith as she grieved her children. We chat about the truth we can cling to when we don't *feel* the Holy Spirit and when God feels silent. Rachel also shares about her new book "Grieve, Create, Believe: Process Your Loss with Intention and Truth". You definitely don't want to miss this episode. We invite you to brew a hot pot of coffee, cozy up with a blanket and some tissues, and join us as we dive in to the new year with Rachel George.

Twinkling lights, familiar carols, and family gatherings can make the void feel that much deeper when you're missing someone special. Christmastime can feel bittersweet and even downright painful when there is an empty stocking on the mantle or an unfilled seat at the table. For anyone who's grieving, this can be a particularly difficult time of year. In today's episode, we're talking about grief at Christmastime and chatting about Nancy Guthrie's article "What Grieving People Wish You Knew at Christmas" (found on desiringgod.org). We hope you'll find encouragement and support here as we chat about our struggles with this season, as well as the hope we have in Jesus--our Emmanuel, God with us.

As we continue the conversation on hope in the hospital, we're joined by our friend Tanisha Garnier of Namesake Ink. Tanisha shares her story of hope in the hospital, including the pain of infertility, the loss of her precious son Xavier at 21-weeks gestation, and the miraculous life of her daughter Ezra, who spent the first 3.5 months of her life in the hospital. Tanisha beautifully shares how the church reflects Christ in how we love one another through suffering and of the unshakable hope we have in Jesus in the midst of our deepest grief. We were so incredibly encouraged by Tanisha's story and we hope you will be too! Be sure to connect with us via Facebook or Instagram @throughthelenspodcast. We'd be honored to hear your story.

The hospital is a place of new beginnings and heartbreaking endings. It is simultaneously full of the hope of birth and new life, and the sorrow of death and earthly loss. As loss mamas, memories of the hospital evoke emotional pain and even PTSD, and in other ways these memories can be quite comforting. I guess you could say our emotions surrounding the hospital are quite complicated. In today's episode, we're talking about both the joy and trauma of our own hospital experiences and how God's grace meets us in the middle of codes and beeps, the doctor rounds and diagnoses, and the sacred tears shared with family and friends. We hope you leave this conversation reflecting on the unshakeable hope we have in God's sovereignty and Christ's victory over death. Episode 37: Hope in the Hospital is now available for download. Be sure to connect with us via Facebook or Instagram @throughthelenspodcast. We'd be honored to hear your story.

This month we're continuing to address loss upon loss, sorrow upon sorrow. Rather than a life of comfort, Jesus promised us that His children would face heartache in this world. Even if we never walk through two identical losses, it is likely that the trials of this life are not all behind us and will result in the loss of something--perhaps our health, a friendship, a dream. Even when the hits seem to keep coming, Jesus encourages us with the truth that He has overcome the world. As we continue this discussion, we are joined by our friend and author Rosemary Pope. In our latest episode, @rosemarypope.author shares her story of stillbirth, infant loss and miscarriage, and encourages us to trust God to carry us through the deepest valleys. Grab some tissues or a cozy blanket and join us for Episode 36: Joy in Suffering with Rosemary Pope, now available on iTunes, Stitcher and Spotify. Be sure to connect with us via Facebook or Instagram @throughthelenspodcast. We'd be honored to hear your story.

When we've walked through a traumatic event such as the loss of a child, it is easy to feel like we "paid our dues". It seems as if we've had more than our fair share of suffering and things can only get better from here. But what about when things don't seem to get better? How can we reconcile the goodness of God when the worst happens again and it feels like lightning keeps striking in the same spot? In today's episode, we're sharing some of our own experiences with recurrent loss, as well as the frustrations and questions we've wrestled with. We also take a closer look at the Biblical account of Job--a righteous man who walked through incredible suffering upon suffering. No matter what your suffering has looked like in the past, this conversation is for you. If you're reading this and you haven't experienced multiple losses, we want to acknowledge that one loss is profoundly painful and is one too many. We encourage you to stick with us because we think there is something in this episode for all of us, as Jesus did tell us that we would face trials in this world. Even if you never walk through a loss like a previous loss (and we pray you don't), it is likely that we will all walk through trials--resulting in the loss of something. Our comfort, our health, a dream. Grab a cup of your favorite hot beverage and join us as we link arms with one another and discuss this difficult topic. Episode 35: Hope in Loss Upon Loss is now available wherever you listen to podcasts. Be sure to connect with us via Facebook or Instagram @throughthelenspodcast. We'd be honored to hear your story.

"I don't care, as long as they're healthy!" Chances are, you've heard this phrase spoken by or to a pregnant woman. You've likely said it yourself a few times. We're right there with you and have uttered these words more times than we can count. It wasn't until our firstborn sons came into the world, both with conditions deemed incredibly "unhealthy", that we began to take a deeper look at the implications of this phrase. Where do we place our hope when our babies aren't healthy? As we wrap up the spring season, we're chatting about the phrase "as long as they're healthy". We talk about our natural longing for wholeness and health, as humans created in the image of God, and the hope we can cling to when sickness enters our lives. We discuss the value of all life, healthy or sick, and the way God's power is made perfect in our weaknesses. Episode 32: I Just Want a Healthy Baby is now available on all your favorite podcast apps.

While Mother's Day is a day of celebration for many, we know it can be bittersweet for our sisters who have lost children, have lost mothers, have strained relationships with their mothers or their children, are walking through infertility, or are walking through a variety of challenges unique to their motherhood. As we come out of Mother's Day weekend, we've compiled an audio Mother's Day card containing words of encouragement and support from mamas within this community. Join Amy Balentine ( @youmadememom), Kelley Ramsey ( @waiting.in.hope), Kristen Ironside ( @k_ironside), Maci Johnson ( @macecakes11), Sarah Rieke ( @sarah_rieke), T Lopez ( @officialtlopez), Holly Colonna ( @movemoregirls), and Kristin Hernandez ( @sunlightindecember) as we each share what God has been laying on our hearts in this season. We hope you walk away from this conversation feeling loved, supported, and known--not just by your sisters, but by a loving Father who sees you, even when you feel forgotten. Happy Mother's Day to all of the mothers. To the ones who ache with empty arms and the ones who feel as if their hands could not be more full. To the ones who have carried babies in their hearts, their wombs, or their prayers. To the ones who feel overlooked or unknown. To the ones who carry the pain of losing their own mother. To the ones who view this day with joy, the ones who approach this day with dread, and the ones who feel a complicated mixture of both. No matter what motherhood looks like for you, this one's for you. We love you.

In today's episode, Holly sits down to chat with our friend Kristin Ironside about the difficult journey of carrying a baby who isn't expected to live outside the womb. Kristin shares the grief that came with her daughter's diagnosis, as well as the ways God has revealed Himself to her and given her strength in the midst of the heartache. She explains how people have demonstrated the love of Christ, practical ways she is preparing for her daughter's birth, and the way this diagnosis has shaped her view of eternity and the hope we have in Jesus. This conversation is especially unique as it comes from the perspective of a mama who is currently pregnant and walking this road, anticipating the arrival and departure of her precious daughter. We are so honored that Kristin entrusted us with her story and we look forward to sharing her words with you today. Episode 30: A Fatal Diagnosis with Kristin Ironside is now available. Be sure to connect with us via Facebook or Instagram @throughthelenspodcast. We'd be honored to hear your story.

Pregnancy is arguably one of the most exciting times in a mother's life. But for some, it can also be one of the most painful and challenging seasons--especially for a mother carrying a baby with a terminal diagnosis. We often talk about the grief that follows the loss of a child, but today we're talking about the complicated mixture of grief and expectation that comes with carrying a child who may not come home. We're sharing our stories of prenatal diagnoses, as well as the ways we "prepared" for the unexpected and the unimaginable. We discuss baby showers and nurseries (or lack thereof), as well as the encouragement we have in Christ when we are faced with a heartbreaking prognosis. Whether you have carried or are carrying a child with a terminal diagnosis, or have walked through anything difficult (that's all of us, because let's be real--who hasn't?) we invite you to join us as we talk about a topic so dear to our hearts. Episode 29: Preparing for a Baby You Won't Bring Home is now available. Be sure to connect with us via Facebook or Instagram @throughthelenspodcast. We'd be honored to hear your story.

No matter how painful or broken they may seem, our stories can be used by God as an avenue for sharing the gospel and speaking truth to a hurting world. In sharing our stories--whether with groups or new friends over coffee--we create space for the gospel to be shared, to point others to the hope of heaven, and to continually preach the gospel to ourselves as we continue to work out our grief. In today's episode, we're chatting about the beauty that can come from sharing our stories and what God has done, and is continuing to do, in our lives. We talk about the difficulties we have faced in sharing our stories, as well as the ways speaking our stories out loud has changed over the years. Episode 28: Hear Me Out is now available and we hope you'll join us. Connect with us via Instagram @throughthelenspodcast or Facebook.  We'd love to hear your story.

In today's episode, Kristin is joined by her husband, Chris, to chat about marriage--specifically the challenge of marriage tested through the fire of grief and loss, loving your spouse well, even when you grieve differently, and the encouragement and admonition we can find in scripture. Chris shares the story of their firstborn son, Ethan, and talks about this painful loss from his perspective as a husband and a father. We hope you'll join us for Episode 27: For Better or Worse with Chris and Kristin Hernandez, now available on all your favorite podcast apps. Connect with us via Instagram @throughthelenspodcast or Facebook.  We'd love to hear your story.