Locker Room - A Southland Christian Church Podcast

Phones, technology and social media are simply tools for communication. The effects of using a tool depend on the purpose for which it is used, but the tool itself is neutral in origin. It’s similar to having a hammer. You can build something with a hammer. You can also destroy something or hurt someone. The tools are not the problem. How something is used is the problem. The same is true with social media and smartphones. In this episode we’ll discuss how to use technology appropriately and navigating when and how to introduce technology safely into the lives of your kids. Our guest on the podcast this week is Scott Harvey. Scott has 20 years of experience in law enforcement, specializing in hostage negotiations and communication. He is also a husband and girl dad, and author of the book, Silence Kills: Communication Tactics to Speak with Confidence and Build Your Influence.   DISCUSSION GUIDE What was the first cell phone you owned? What year did you get it? What did you primarily use it for? Which tool (literally or figuratively) do you find most valuable? What makes it so important to you? Technology like a smartphone is a tool that can be used for good or bad. How has having a smartphone been good for you? How has it been bad? Scott mentioned two points for determining when your child should get a smartphone: 1) Point of need. 2) Point of responsibility. What are good things to consider when making this decision? Did your parents utilize similar rules when giving you responsibility like this? It can be easy to default to buying the newest, nicest thing. What are some healthy questions to ask yourself before you add any new technology (newest phone, VR, Gaming system, etc.) to your life? In what ways have you used social media? What apps do you currently use? What do you enjoy about the apps you use? What issues have come about from social media? Scott mentioned how we handle our kids’ minor screw-ups will affect how they approach major mess-ups. How do you react when your child disobeys? How can you start healthy lines of conversation now so that they can come to you in times of need? What boundaries, time limits, etc. are healthy to set for your children’s phones? What about for your phone? The episode discussed the dangers of pornography, sexting, and sextortion. What do we do with the information? How do we communicate this well to our kids? How do we provide space for confession when our kids make these errors? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?   NEXT STEPS  Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

Parents work really hard to be intentional when their kids are young. In those early years we teach them so much: how to walk, talk, eat, have manners, to say they're sorry, to learn to play with others, to be grateful…all these things. But the decisions our teenagers make in middle and high school have bigger consequences. The stakes are higher; the fallout greater. The decisions they make in these seven years set up their lives in college or young adulthood, and in turn can set the tone for the next forty years of their lives. So we want to do our best to take advantage of these seven years in middle and high school. In today’s episode of Locker Room, we circle up with members of Southland’s Student Ministry: Connor Hall, Casey Whitehead and Peter Sohn to talk about some of the unique challenges facing our teens as they navigate our current culture.   DISCUSSION GUIDE What were you like in your teenage years? “Parents are primary, student ministry is secondary.” What encourages you about the partnership between you as a parent and the church’s role in ministry to your son or daughter? This age range is where so much happens in a students’ life. How do you think you’ll react or how did you react to your son or daughter being in that age range? Scott and the student team went through “dysphoria” specifically “gender dysphoria” and “transgender” and the definitions of those. Obviously a lot is going on in terminology for teenagers today but also for everyone. What has helped you as a Christian man to combat these topics? There’s a lot of truth from the bible about what God says about who we are and what God says about life and who we are made to be. What can you do practically to share this with your teenager? Scott and the student team talked about sex, dating, and marriage and how important it is to “not be late to the game.” How can you encourage a friend or yourself to do this before it’s too late to speak biblical truth? Asking good questions was mentioned. What does it look like to really take intentional time to ask the right questions to your teenager? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?   NEXT STEPS  Join a Group at southland.church/groups Go to southland.church/volunteer to sign up to volunteer in student ministry Resources Parenting by Paul David Tripp Irreversible Damage: The Transgendered Craze Seducing Our Daughters, by Abigail Shrier  Holy Sexuality and the Gospel:  Sex, Desire, and Relationships Shaped by God’s Grand Story, by Christopher Yuan.    Out of a Far Country:  A Gay Son’s Journey to God.  A Broken Mother’s Search for Hope. By Christopher Yuan & Angela Yuan. Gay Girl, Good God, by Jackie Hill Perry.  For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church  

This week on Locker Room we’re kicking off a four-part series on parenting. In this first episode we are looking at raising littles: from babies up through elementary. If you’re a dad or a parent with little kids—you will find encouragement in our conversation today. Next week we'll talk about raising teenagers (middle and high school) and we’ll navigate some really relevant topics that are on the forefront of culture right now. In week 3, we’ll look at navigating parenting with smartphones and social media in a digital world. Week 4, we’ll talk about raising girls. Our guests around the table today are from our Southland Children’s team: Jason Byerly, Kelsi Collins, and Krista McCoy Tudor. Join us as we dive into the wild ride that is parenting littles! Southland also has a Parenting Podcast that you can find at southland.church/podcasts or anywhere that you get your podcasts. Scott Nickell is leading that effort—it’s a great podcast that’s really encouraging for parents. You should check it out!   DISCUSSION GUIDE What’s the funniest story from your childhood or one of your kids? What were you like as a child? What is a phrase you say over and over again? Whether to your kids or just in life. Two truths were addressed at the beginning of the podcast: Parenting is the hardest job on the planet. There are no perfect parents, perfect children, or perfect families. Have you always believed this? Do you ever feel like you don’t measure up because you compare yourself to other “perfect” people/families? Have you ever volunteered to work with kids at church or other areas? Why is it valuable to have men who invest in the next generation? Our nursery and preschool focus is there is a God who made you and loves you. Our elementary focus is Biblical literacy, apologetics, & spiritual practices. How does that compare to what you understood about God growing up? Why are these important foundations for our kids to learn? Read Deuteronomy 6:5-9. It’s the primary role of a parent to invest in the spiritual lives of their children. If you are a parent, how do you live out this passage? Is there anything you need to start doing and stop doing? If you are not a parent, how can you serve families who are trying to live out this commandment? How were you disciplined as a child? How do you discipline as a parent? What was valuable from the podcast about discipline? In what ways did you learn responsibility growing up? What is something you can do to help the next generation learn how to do hard things and build resilience? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?   NEXT STEPS  Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

The Bible describes David as “A man after God’s own heart”, yet his life got sideways and there was a season where David lived a double life. David wasn’t the only person on the planet that has lived a hypocritical double life as a child of God. No doubt there are some of us that are currently living a double life. We may be compartmentalizing our own sin and trying to manage our own darkness while projecting a different image towards others. Our guest Alan Chan joins the podcast this week to talk about the process of overcoming past shame and embracing the transformation of walking a new path with Christ.   DISCUSSION GUIDE If you could put together the perfect fast food meal what would it be? (Ex. Entree - Chick-fil-A chicken Sandwich, Side - Arby’s curly fries, Drink - McDonald’s diet coke, dessert - Cookout Milkshake) What was your first full-time job? How did you connect with the other employees? An invite to volleyball and Thursday night dinner connected Alan to the church. Who helped you connect to the church? Is there anyone you could invite to a church-related group or event? Alan talks about how he lived a double life for a season. He went to church events but still partied throughout the week. Has there been a season where you have lived a double life? Are you living one now? What effect does living a double life have on you? What effect does it have on people around you? Read John 10:10. What areas of life are you letting the accuser steal from you? How can you step into the full life Jesus wants you to have? Have you ever been confronted by a Christian brother on sin in your life? How did they handle it? How did you respond? Read Psalm 32:1-5. What does this passage teach us about God’s grace and how he wants us to be honest with our sin? Alan talked about rededicating his life, getting baptized, & being transformed by Jesus. Share about your baptism and how God has transformed you from your old life. What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?   NEXT STEPS  Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church    

At some point in our lives, we all have to do battle with hard things.  We’re back this week with Chris, Edgar, and Matt to share more of their stories. We’ll share stories of navigating the pain of divorce, choosing to partner with God on mission in your daily work, and the experience of walking through faith with a family member in the last steps of life. If you missed last week’s episode, be sure to check it out first and come back here for part 2. DISCUSSION GUIDE What can we as men learn from Chris as he shared how he walked through divorce and healing from that? Chris talked about how hard divorce was and how the enemy attacked him. How can men rally around other men going through this? He talked also about how he was prepared for the hard moments going into dating and marriage again. What can we learn from that preparation even in the hardest things? Chris mentioned his non-negotiables. These are super specific and deep. What challenged you about that list? “Men, we are not our vocations.” How have you struggled with knowing that what you do for a job isn’t fully who you are as a man? Southland has a strategy that we would be a church that encourages people to be “with Jesus, in community, on mission.” Edgar has the opportunity to do this in his work as a realtor. What encourages you to share Jesus even at your workplace? There were stories shared about opportunities Edgar had to share the gospel and deepening relationships with people and families. How can you become more bold to share God with people you get an opportunity to work with? Matt shared the gospel with his brother Mike. He was bold in faith to share with his brother Mike. What did you learn about how to be bold, even with family, for sharing the good news of what God has done for us with someone? Our role as Christ-followers is to share our faith with others. What steps do you need to take to share the the good news of the gospel with someone? Maybe a friend, family member, co-worker, or is it a stranger? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?   NEXT STEPS  Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church  

  /* Revised version with complete episode */ Each of us has a story to tell from the battles we have faced in our life. This week on the podcast, Scott sits down with three guests to share from their experiences. Chris, Edgar and Matt share their stories: fighting legalism and its ability to trip us up in our faith, stepping up as a new believer to become the spiritual leader of our home, and making a radical change of heart to quit taking grace for granted and start chasing after the things God has for us to do. -- A quick apology to our listeners: we misfired this week and released this episode incompletely. This release is an updated version with the full content! DISCUSSION GUIDE What is the worst injury you’ve ever had? Where have you served/volunteered in the church? Where have you served/volunteered outside of the church The men discussed the impact Fight Club has made on their lives. What group or team has made the biggest impact in your life? The lie of legalism uses this equation: Salvation = Jesus + the good things I do. Why is this so dangerous? When it comes to your faith, what do you put your pride in besides Jesus? Read Galatians 2:19-21. Legalism distorts the truth of the gospel. Speak to the impact of that passage and how it should crush our legalism. Men have been called to lead their wives and families. What men have you seen do this well? What does it look like to lead your family well? In what areas of your life do you lead? Are you leading in the way Jesus did? For the married men, are you the spiritual leader of your marriage? What steps do you need to take to do this better? Have you ever been a “spiritually bankrupt grace abuser”? How have you compartmentalized your faith and okayed sinful behavior in other areas of your life? Have you ever been “punched in the mouth by the Holy Spirit”? How has God radically transformed your life? Are you hungry to change and chase after God? What does that look like for you? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?   NEXT STEPS  Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

Each of us has a story to tell from the battles we have faced in our life. This week on the podcast, Scott sits down with three guests to share from their experiences. Chris, Edgar and Matt share their stories: fighting legalism and its ability to trip us up in our faith, stepping up as a new believer to become the spiritual leader of our home, and making a radical change of heart to quit taking grace for granted and start chasing after the things God has for us to do.   DISCUSSION GUIDE What is the worst injury you’ve ever had? Where have you served/volunteered in the church? Where have you served/volunteered outside of the church The men discussed the impact Fight Club has made on their lives. What group or team has made the biggest impact in your life? The lie of legalism uses this equation: Salvation = Jesus + the good things I do. Why is this so dangerous? When it comes to your faith, what do you put your pride in besides Jesus? Read Galatians 2:19-21. Legalism distorts the truth of the gospel. Speak to the impact of that passage and how it should crush our legalism. Men have been called to lead their wives and families. What men have you seen do this well? What does it look like to lead your family well? In what areas of your life do you lead? Are you leading in the way Jesus did? For the married men, are you the spiritual leader of your marriage? What steps do you need to take to do this better? Have you ever been a “spiritually bankrupt grace abuser”? How have you compartmentalized your faith and okayed sinful behavior in other areas of your life? Have you ever been “punched in the mouth by the Holy Spirit”? How has God radically transformed your life? Are you hungry to change and chase after God? What does that look like for you? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down?   NEXT STEPS  Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

The wounds we receive from our parents send a message. This message is almost always a lie. When we believe that lie, it drives a channel that confuses who we are, how we communicate and how we operate as men. The effects of these wounds include low self-esteem, a deep longing, deep emotional pain inside and a performance-orientation that makes us “doers” rather than “beings.” This week on the podcast we are diving back in with our second episode in a series called Southland Men. Our guest this week, Jordan Moody joins in for a conversation about growing up in a broken home and how God can redeem the past and give us a new path to walk, going forward.   DISCUSSION GUIDE Jordan and Scott mentioned their family to all of us. Share about your family with your group. Scott helped us understand that “wounds create trauma.” What are things we can do as men to help care for our wounds or our friends' wounds? Scott also talked about how wounds from family create 2 types of trauma. 1) The absence of good things that we need. 2) The presence of bad things that should have never happened. This trauma has a big impact on those affected. How can we help stop this from happening to future generations? Read Romans 8:35-37. How can that kind of faith and belief encourage people to be “more than conquerors through Him who loved us?” Scott brought up that he and Jordan texted about doing this podcast episode. This brought up a lie from the enemy about not deserving to have a seat at the table. Spend time praying against this mindset. How can we encourage men to look past this lie and share our testimonies? This quote was mentioned multiple times, “You’re not responsible for what happened to you – you’re responsible for what you do with it.” As you take a second to think about that, what does that mean for you in your life? “Boundaries are like good fences.” What are some good fences that you need to build in your life? There was a specific callout to dads and how father wounds become inflicted on our kids. Spend a few minutes praying over father wounds in general for men. How has this affected you as either the son or the father? Remember Matthew 19:26 as you discuss. What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down? NEXT STEPS - Spend time as a group praying over the Prevett family. - If you’re wrestling with Christianity, would like to become a Christ-follower, or need help figuring out what’s next, email lockerroom@southland.church. - Join a Group at southland.church/groups - For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

This week on Locker Room we’re pressing pause in our Southland Men series for a bonus episode to make you aware of a great resource for men and families. Dave Stone, former Senior Pastor at Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, Kentucky joins us on the podcast today to talk about a special story from the heart of their church family. --- NEXT STEPS  - Join a Group at southland.church/groups - Get tickets or find out more at ordinaryangels.movie - For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church    

This week on Locker Room we are kicking off a new series of episodes and we’re calling it Southland Men. Each week we will be hearing the stories of men in our church that are in the battle, recovering ground, and walking a new path. These guys are taking courageous steps, fighting both for their own lives and the lives of their families. These men are making their lives count. Up first this week is a conversation with Addison Hughes, talking about three obstacles that many of us have struggled with in our own lives: perfectionism, idolatry, and fear. DISCUSSION GUIDE: Have you ever wiped out on the ski slopes or somewhere else? How’d it happen? What group or team has made the biggest impact in your life? Why was it so valuable? Perfectionism - Do you err on the side of perfectionism or carelessness? Why do you think that is? If you wrestle with perfectionism, what type is it? Self-oriented, expectation-driven, or others-oriented? Idolatry - What things, good or bad, have been idols in your life? Which of these things have you been able to put in the right place in your life? What are idols you still struggle with placing in front of God? Fear - What are some of the biggest fears in your life? Do you tend to catastrophize (fixate on the worst possible outcome)? Read Genesis 1:26-27 & John 1:12-13. What do these passages say about our identity? Is it hard for you to accept this identity? Read John 19:30 & Colossians 2:13-14. The Cross is Enough. Why do you think men tend to act like that isn’t true? How do you try to earn what Jesus has already given you? Read Matthew 11:28-30. What does it look like to go to Jesus in times of fear, anxiety or exhaustion? How has Jesus given you rest? What does his “yoke” look like from your experience? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down? NEXT STEPS  Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

We're back this week for the second part of a conversation on six core values for living as a godly man with our guests Daniel Mercer and Ian Schweitzer. In today's episode we'll hit values 3-6 and see how applying them in our lives will reinforce our identity, drive our decisions, move us towards intentionality and bless those people in our lives. If you missed part one, be sure to check it out! DISCUSSION GUIDE: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? The guys told us their “father of the year” stories, what’s yours? If you’re not a father, what is something you've seen other fathers do that can be in the “father of the year” list? The third “H” is for “honesty.” In what ways have you seen the importance of honesty in your life? What are you doing to fight for your integrity? The fourth “H” is for “humility.” What makes it hard for men to show humility well? Why is pride so dangerous for men? What are you doing to crush pride and pursue humility? The fifth “H” is for “hungry.” Are you actually hungry for God and what he’s doing in you and your community's life? The guys talked about how they’re “hungry” in their lives, do you see any similarities in your life? What are you doing to stay hungry? What is an area in your life that God is wanting you to grow in? The sixth and final “H” is for “healthy.” Our physical health is important, but so is our spiritual health. What did you learn from the guys about spiritual health? What steps do you need to take as you pursue being healthy spiritually, emotionally, relationally, and physically? After learning all 6 H’s is there one that you want to work on this week specifically? What else from this episode did you learn or grow in? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down? Next Steps  Check out the Core 52 book by Mark Moore. Learn more here: https://core52.org/ Check out Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster The guys talked about Her Knight Father/Daughter dance, check out the website for more details https://herknightdance.org/ Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

This week we’re wrapping up our Ethos of Godly Men series on Locker Room with the first of a two-part roundtable discussion on six characteristics that are mission-critical in building the culture of godly men. DISCUSSION GUIDE What is your worst haircut story? Looking back at your past outfits in life, what clothing choice do you regret the most? What is your biggest pet peeve? The first “H” is “Holy.” As said in the episode the words “holy” and “holiness” are used over 900 times in the bible. Why do you think it’s used that many times in scripture? The Hebrew word for “Holy” is “Kodesh” and that means “separate” or “set apart.” Does learning that meaning change your definition of what Holy means? What do you need to do to pursue Holiness? The second “H” is “Harmony.” In music, harmony is so noticeable when it goes wrong but is so great when it’s done well. Do you think it’s the same way in everyday life or in community? Where in your life do you need to seek harmony? What else from this episode did you learn or grow in? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down? Next Steps  Check out the Core 52 book by Mark Moore. Learn more here: https://core52.org/ Check out Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster The guys talked about Her Knight Father/Daughter dance, check out the website for more details https://herknightdance.org/ Join a Group at southland.church/groups Join Fight Club in Georgetown https://southlandchristian.churchcenter.com/groups/georgetown-campus-groups/fight-club  Learn more about being a Marriage Mentor - email Shatfield@southland.church Check out the Parenting Podcast and more at southland.church/podcasts For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

Tell Me More Takes Over Locker Room This week on the podcast, we’re joined by Jessica McKenney, Sarah Hopkins and Lydia Florence—the three hosts of our women’s podcast, Tell Me More—to talk about the Ethos of Godly Men from their perspective. We’ll discuss the influence of men and fathers in women’s lives, and the picture of a man’s identity in Jesus. We’ll also take a look at some of the patterns they are seeing in men in today’s culture and provide encouragement to men who are in the fight, following Jesus on mission.   DISCUSSION GUIDE What women have made the biggest impact in your life? How have they shaped who you are today? The Tell Me More crew mentioned they have time for Hot Takes in their podcast. What’s a hot take you have (an opinion that may not be popular)? We have a man problem in our world. The brokenness in our world primarily comes from an absent man or a broken man. How have you seen this be true in your life? Where have you contributed to this brokenness? The women talked about their relationship with their fathers. What was your relationship with your Dad growing up? How has that affected who you’ve become? Often women have to carry the spiritual weight of families and churches. Why do you think men tend towards passivity when it comes to faith? What is a practical step of leadership you can take to engage in your faith, your family, the church, etc? Have you been sold a bad picture of Jesus? A Jesus who is too weak, small, irrelevant, etc. Who is Jesus to you? Jesus elevated women in a culture that treated them terribly. Do you value and live women the same way Jesus did? How does that show in your actions? What needs to change about how you treat and speak to/about women? Read Mark 1:9-11. God the Father affirms Jesus as his Beloved Son and Jesus lived out of that identity. Where do you find your identity? Did you know that if you follow Jesus God calls you His beloved son, too? What practical steps can you take towards living out of that identity, God’s beloved son? Jesus was emotionally healthy. Meaning he laughed, cried, got angered, etc. All in healthy ways though. Are you more naturally unemotional or overly emotional? How can you grow in your emotional health? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down? NEXT STEPS Check out the Tell Me More Podcast and recommend it to a woman in your life at southland.church/podcasts Join a Group at southland.church/groups For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

“The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us.” John 1:14(NIV) In God's Word we have the blueprint for what it means to be a Godly man in our Leader and King, Jesus. When we read the gospels, we’re not just looking at what Jesus says and the things He did. We want to look at how Jesus handles hard times and difficult people. In this episode we’ll look at how Jesus responds, what He does, how He uses His words and how He treats those who love Him and those that hate Him. We want to challenge you to pay attention to the rhythms that Jesus creates: being with His Father, and then living His life on mission with passion and purpose.   DISCUSSION GUIDE: Have you ever trained for a race or event? What was that process like? Add on to what the Scotts’ favorites were in this episode. What’s your favorite movie? What was your first concert? What’s your favorite kind of music? Who’s your favorite athlete? In a world where men are expected to shove emotions down, what does it look like to ask the question “am I enough?” to God? Where do you need to stop seeking that validation? Action 1: Be consumed with the gospel and remind yourself of your rescue story. What does it mean to be “consumed” with the gospel? How do you make sure you do this? Action 2: Put away childhood and childish ways. How are you going to do this in your own life? Read 1 Corinthians 13:11, what does this motivate you to do in your own life? Action 3: Seek wisdom and the gift of wise people. Read Proverbs 13:20, Who can you reach out to for wisdom? What about them makes you want to reach out to them? Action 4: Move towards the mess and do hard things. This seems opposite from what culture would tell us. What “hard things” do you need to move towards? These 4 actions aren’t something that can be 100% changed overnight. What are you going to do to keep fighting to do these things? What else from this episode did you learn or grow in? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down? Next Steps  Join a Group at southland.church/groups Join Fight Club in Georgetown https://southlandchristian.churchcenter.com/groups/georgetown-campus-groups/fight-club  Learn more about being a Marriage Mentor - email Shatfield@southland.church Check out the Parenting Podcast and more at southland.church/podcasts For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

“If the world hates you, remember that it hated me first.” — Jesus; John 15:18(NLT) If you are insulted because you bear the name of Christ, you will be blessed, for the glorious Spirit of God rests upon you. — 1 Peter 4:14(NLT) Scott Nickell joins us this week on the podcast for an extended conversation on one of the biggest challenges we face today as followers of Jesus: how do we navigate in the rough waters of a culture and nation that is increasingly and actively resistant to us and our faith?   DISCUSSION GUIDE What’s the craziest experience you’ve had as an away team player/fan? What makes being in an environment away from home so difficult? Do you think you would handle it well? Arguably the most controversial verse in the bible to say in today’s culture is John 14:6 where Jesus said, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” How does this statement help us as Christ followers in conversations with others? Scott Nickell said, “If we are going to be hated, let it be for the right reasons, not for being big jerks.” Discuss how that can be implemented in your life. Are there any reasons people would hate you outside of your relationship with Jesus? Where have you seen religious legalism combated? Why do we tend to see our relationship with God as works-based? What are the big dominos you’ve seen fall in the lives of religious progressives? Read 2 Timothy 3:1-7. Discuss how you can fight from the “terrible times”. What does it look like in your life? Scott quoted the book Post Christian, “the great challenge today isn’t to convince people that there’s a god. The great challenge is to convince people, there’s one God.” Do you agree with this in relation to false religions? Why or why not? Oftentimes we give politicians and governments too much credit for how they rule our lives. How can we remember John 14:6 in corrupt governments? What else from this episode did you learn or grow in? What did God/the Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down? Next Steps  Watch Scott’s sermon on How To Be Hated in 3 Simple Steps at https://southland.church/messages/how-to-be-hated-in-3-simple-steps Join a Group at southland.church/groups Join Fight Club in Georgetown https://southlandchristian.churchcenter.com/groups/georgetown-campus-groups/fight-club  Learn more about being a Marriage Mentor - email Shatfield@southland.church Check out the Parenting Podcast and more at southland.church/podcasts For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

Developing a healthy, intentional ethos (culture and characteristics) as a Godly man is critical. It’s about building disciplines that drive us to deeper places, move us closer to Jesus, and infuse purpose back into our lives. On today's episode we will dive into 3 things that should be non-negotiables for us as men. DISCUSSION GUIDE : Are you a person who sets goals/resolutions? What goals have you set for yourself recently? How has it been going for you? Share a funny story of when you gave up on a goal way too quickly. Challenge 1: Pursue Jesus Daily - What does it look like for you to follow Jesus on a day-to-day basis? Does reading come naturally to you? How often are you actually in God’s Word? Would you like your time reading the Bible to look different? How so? Read 2 Timothy 3:16-17 & Hebrews 12:4. Based on these scriptures, why is it so valuable to be reading the Bible? If you don’t have a daily Bible reading rhythm make one now. Take a few minutes now to discuss a plan to read daily and together. Then make a plan to keep each other accountable. Challenge 2: Exercise Consistently - Read Mark 12:30, 1 Corinthians 9:26-27, and 1 Timothy 4:8. Men can fall into two extremes when it comes to physical health: they either ignore it or worship it. Which camp do you tend to fall in? Do you value training and diet in the right way? Read 1 Corinthians 6:19-20. The way we treat our bodies reflects how we feel about God. Can you honestly say you honor God with your body based on how you exercise and eat? What do you need to start doing (today, tomorrow, or next week) to honor God with your body? Challenge 3: Live in Community with other Godly men. If you’re answering these questions, you are likely already doing this. What has Biblical community looked like for you over the years? How have you benefited from doing life with other men? Read Proverbs 27:17 & Proverbs 13:20. Who is sharpening you to look more like Christ? Who in your life leads you to foolish harm? What changes do you need to make to the men you surround yourself with? What else from the podcast spoke to you? What did God/Holy Spirit speak/prompt/say to you?  What’s God asking you to do?  What does He want to give you?  What does He want you to lay down? Next Steps Join a Group at southland.church/groups Join Fight Club in Georgetown Learn more about being a Marriage Mentor - email Shatfield@southland.church Check out the Parenting Podcast and more at southland.church/podcasts For any other questions or comments email lockerroom@southland.church

There isn't a tougher job on the planet than parenting! At the same time, there are a ton of voices speaking into how to do it. We are releasing a new podcast for parents that focuses first on the heart of the parent because at the end of the day, you can't give what you don't have. We want so many things for our kids, but often what matters most when it comes to our parenting is the condition of our own hearts. That's what our new podcast is all about. This first episode is published here on the Locker Room podcast feed. To subscribe to future episodes, find, "Parenting - a Southland.Church podcast" on your favorite podcast platform, or listen on our website at https://southland.church/podcasts -- Episode 1: Parenting Begins in Our Hearts The most influential thing on the hearts of our children—for good or for bad—is the state of our own hearts and what comes out of us. We have all been influenced by our own individual experiences growing up. Some of us only had one parent around. Some of us didn’t have a strong faith component in our lives growing up—no map to guide us on what to do. Some of us may have grown up in a family where faith was a key part of daily life, but maybe we never had that personal relationship with the Father. Our hosts for this podcast have been in some of those places, and we’ll discuss how getting our own hearts right with God is the first and most important step we can take as parents.  

If you are a Christian, you are playing an away game. There was a day when the church was a predominant influence in culture. Not anymore. In the U.S. the church has lost influence in our communities and been pushed out to the margins, and Christ-followers are no longer warmly met, but now face vitriol and resistance.  But this is nothing new. In this episode of Locker Room Scott and returning guest Kevin Comp sit down to look back into history to a time when a group of young men who followed the Lord were faced with an ultimate test of faith versus a culture that wanted nothing to do with God. Discussion Guide: Which option would you pick between truth or dare? Why?      Describe a time when you saw someone do something courageous. Where did their strength come from? What effect did their courage have on you?   Read Daniel 1:1-21. The first chapter of the book of Daniel provides context for the type of character and courage Daniel, Hananiah (Shadrach), Mishael (Meshach), and Azariah (Abednego) possessed. What specific attributes or actions of these four men stand out to you? Why?  Read Daniel 2:46-49. The second chapter could be summarized in three acts: Nebuchadnezzar’s dream, Daniel’s interpretation, and Nebuchadnezzar’s response. What’s significant about Nebuchadnezzar’s response to Daniel’s interpretation of his dream? How should we have expected him to respond?  Read Daniel 3:1-7. Pride is a dangerous form of self-deception, and it’s abundantly clear with Nebuchadnezzar. What areas in your life do you intentionally or unintentionally try to sit on God’s throne? How has He revealed this to you? What’s typically your response when He does?   Read Daniel 3:8-18 and 2 Timothy 1:7. “Even if” is arguably one of the most important qualifiers as it pertains to our walk with God. When was the last time you experienced conflict because of your faith? How did you handle the situation? What did you learn from it?  Read Daniel 3:19-23 and 1 Corinthians 16:13. When are you the most tempted to compromise on your faith? How can you practically guard against this temptation?  Read Daniel 3:24-30 and Isaiah 42:2-3. Why is it so easy for us to forget that God is with us? What are some of the ways we can remind ourselves of His presence, especially when our circumstances seem dire?  Read John 15:18-21. Pastor Tony Evans once said, “A ship belongs in the water, but the water doesn’t belong in the ship. We are to be in the world, but the world should not be in us.” What does it mean to be a counter-cultural Christian in our current cultural climate?   Listen to each of the following songs this week and meditate on Scott’s question: What are you afraid of? “Another in the Fire” by Hillsong Worship “Even If” by MercyMe “Christ Be Magnified” by Cody Carnes  

Eradicate Passivity The definition of passivity is an acceptance of what happens, without active response or resistance. Passivity is apathy, indifference, numbness and resignation. It’s like an ostrich who buries its head in the ground. Nothing brings hell to earth faster than passive, whiny men who blame everyone and everything for their lack of responsibility. Passivity harms a man’s relationship with God and it makes his family vulnerable because he is unwilling to engage in the most important things. In this episode of Locker Room we are going to dig into what can become a huge obstacle for men. -- Discussion Guide The best stories often involve a hero who faces conflict and takes action to overcome it. Who are some of your favorite heroes (in movies/stories, or real life). What about them makes them admirable? When we are passive, we are still making a choice—a choice to do nothing about a situation. We all have had times in life where we can look back and see that taking action could have led to a different result. Think back on a time in your life when taking action would have been the right call. What did the lack of action cost you? Read Genesis 3:1-8. At the beginning of history, Adam—the very first man—stands passively by as Eve eats from the tree that God forbid; and then goes along with the crowd by eating it himself. When God asks what they have done, they both pass the blame—Adam blames Eve and Eve blames the serpent. The impulse to be passive, when action is needed to restrain sin, can entangle us deeply in sin. Read Romans 5:12-20. Notice how sin entered the world through one man’s passivity (Adam), and how sin was atoned for the whole world through Jesus taking responsibility. (It wasn’t his problem, but he made it his responsibility). Passivity and responsibility are opposed to each other. One says, “It’s not my fault, it’s not my problem—there’s nothing I can do about it.” The other says, “It may not be my fault, it may not be my problem, but I can do something about it.” How can we shift our attitude in life from being passive to being someone who takes responsibility? Scott talked about the big beautiful house across from the dairy farm, and how whoever lived there must have gotten to the point where they didn’t notice the stench anymore—but that doesn’t mean the stench was gone—they just became oblivious to it. What are some things in life that you’ve ignored for too long, to the point where you don’t even notice them anymore? -  It could be something in your home that you forgot to put away, and now it’s been there for months. You see it every time you enter the room, but you’ll get to it…  -  It could be a maintenance need on your vehicle that started off as a nuisance but now has become a real problem that is affecting your ability to get to work or participate in activities with friends and family. -  It could be being passive about your personal finances and you need to buckle down and make good choices now so that you can escape debt and get financial freedom in the future. -  It could be your physical health—maybe you used to be active, but life has just been so busy that you have neglected your body. Passivity in our health can bleed over into so many areas. -  Sometimes our passivity can stem from a feeling of being overwhelmed. One small step in the right direction could lead us to success in multiple areas once we see some results. What is one step you could take in each of the areas mentioned above? Have you become passive about your walk with God? Do you find yourself checking in at church on Sundays and waiting to be fed, then going about your week all on your own strength? Look at your calendar and put in one intentional time this week to have a conversation with God and read some of His Word. Even if it is just fifteen minutes, take the first step. Have you become passive in your friendships? Do you spend most of your time thinking about your own needs and not investing in others? If a close friend had a crisis, would you be someone they could call? What can we change about our friendships to build into others? How can we be better listeners? Are you struggling with being passive in your marriage? Do you focus on your work so much that you don’t have anything left in the tank for your spouse? Jobs may come and go. We have to prioritize our marriage relationships. Find some time this week when you were planning to do something for yourself or work that you can instead build into your relationship with your wife. Surprise her by taking responsibility. Have you become passive with your kids? Our children are our responsibility for sure. If we neglect this area, there is no shortage of other things that will influence them. If we don’t maintain a relationship with our kids, they are not going to feel comfortable coming to us when problems arise. What is one step you can take this week to improve your relationship with your children? Consider carving out some time this week to spend with each child. Be slow to speak and eager to listen.

Our guest on this episode of Locker Room is Kevin Wirfel. Kevin and his wife Cheryl lost their son Nathan to suicide on April 9, 2021. In this conversation, Kevin shares about the profound grief they walked through as a family wrestling with this devastating loss. Kevin talks about struggles and warning signs in Nathan’s life; things we should be watching for as parents, and in the lives of our loved ones. Nearly every person that you lock eyes with has someone they care about who has either contemplated or attempted suicide, or knows someone who has taken their own life. People we come in contact with every day may be struggling themselves too. Even you who are reading this may feel trapped or hopeless too. We all need to know there is no shame in getting help and we don’t have to live on an island. Our enemy wants us to feel like we are all alone and have no hope. Don’t believe it. All we have to do is just take a step. The Suicide & Crisis hotline: 988. It’s a 24-hour hotline where someone is always available to talk with you or someone you love. It’s worth putting into your phone contacts—you never know when you might need it. If you’ve been wrestling with grief due to losing someone in your life—we have a Group called Grief Share that currently meets at the Nicholasville and Richmond Campuses. You can go to the Groups page and sign up there. Books that we recommend for families that have walked through suicide: Grieving A Suicide, by Albert Y Hsu. So Much to Live For (How to Provide Help & Hope to Someone Considering Suicide) by Gregory Jantz. For Christian Counseling, go to Southland.church/help scroll down & fill out the form and our staff will get you connected to a couple of Christian Counseling options. All this is confidential. If you’re struggling with depression, suicidal thoughts or feel stuck right now…the drastic thing that you should do is Reach out for help. Please reach out to a church or our church. We have a lot of resources and we’d be honored to come alongside you and your family. We’ve got staff that would be willing to sit down with you, Groups for Veterans, First Responders, Mental Health Groups, Grief Share and a bunch of other Groups—you need community and you need to know that you’re not alone. Please reach out. Discussion Guide: What’s one thing that brings a smile to your face regardless of how tough your day has been? (E.g. book, memory, movie, person, song, TV show, etc.) How would you describe your mental health during this season of life? What factors have contributed to your current state?  Scott shared some statistics regarding mental health on a more macro scale. Which was the most alarming or surprising to you? Why?    Read Matthew 22:37. Despite the notion that the Bible only speaks to our spiritual health, Jesus actually speaks to a more comprehensive view of how we’re to love God, love others, and love ourselves — which includes our mental health. How should this change our perspective towards the stigma of mental health?  Read James 5:17-18 and 1 Kings 19:1-8. Elijah is one of the most well-known prophets in the Bible because of the “mountaintop” and “valley” moments he experienced. What are some of the signs that suggest someone may be in a “valley” and struggling with depression? How can we bring these concerns to light in a gracious and tactful way?  Read John 10:10 and 2 Corinthians 1:3-7. Scott and Kevin talked about the lies the enemy will try to plant in our minds. However, God provides us comfort even in the midst of our suffering. Not to give Satan too much credit, why is this an effective strategy? What are some of the reasons discussions about pain and suffering tend to be avoided in Christian circles?   Read Romans 12:1-2, 2 Corinthians 10:3-6, and Ephesians 4:20-24. Paul touches on the importance of our thought patterns in his letters. What are the implications based on these verses?  Read Isaiah 26:3, Romans 8:6, and Colossians 3:1-2. One of the ways we can fight for our mental health is by focusing on the eternal instead of the earthly. What are some of the different ways we can practically set our minds on the things of God? Read, pray, and meditate on Psalm 34:17-18 this week. Make it a commitment to convert this verse to memory.   Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. When you sense something in yourself or in others, say something. Here’s a list of resources to save for future reference:  Suicide & Crisis Hotline 988 Southland Christian Church Care Staff Christian Counseling Referral  Care Groups (DivorceCare, GriefShare, War Stories, etc.)