Apodcalypse

ALERT! We have left New York due to a giant explosion that destroyed everything and everyone but somehow Katie and Gabby survived unscathed. We snuck onto a giant ghost barge and traveled all the way to Chicago for shelter, meeting Joe McMahon a local comedy refugee. We talk all things Chicago based, aka the bean and how the only way to escape is by boat on Lake Michigan since zombies famously can't swim. ALERT #2! We are going radio silent after this episode for a few months to find a new bunker and get our rations in line. See you then losers!

Thomas Whitfield and Mike Abrusci are in the bunker to chat about STDS! Oooooh! Scary! We talk about how Katies famously been the host of the pod each week, how sex ed in America is insane and how AIDs is back so you better watch out you little sex freaks! Whether it's an STI pandemic or just slipping in your backyard.. we're all gonna die! Good luck, may the tides be with you!

Christine Meehan and Kase Raso, two known mothers, join us in the bunker to chat about what it's going to be like mothering they're confirmed and very real children after the end days come. We learn how to have a DIY birth in the woods once civilization has fallen. Christine teaches us how to breastfeed our zombie babies, that she wouldn't eat her own placenta but she would let Mike Cannon eat it and how we should use graphic tees as clothe diapers when parenting in the forest. Kase adds that men fuck around until they can't. Two famous and known mothers with excellent parenting advice for their children that do exist!

This week Yannis Pappas and Kase Raso join us in the bunker to chat about The Mayan Apocalypse!! Pew pew pew!!!! We talk about if during Antiquity, sneaker heads were just guys wearing Greek Sandal 3s, how in ancient times you couldn't just have a baby then write a screen play and how we should rename the podcast “Sorry Mrs. Hannigan”. Yannis wants you all to know, “Everyones gonna die, it’s gonna be bad” and “Theres no escape, it’s gonna be bad”.

Robert Kelly, Rich Vos and Mike Abrusci are in the bunker, baby!!!!!!!! This weeks guests are no stranger to our theme: Bushcrafting. Each one of them has 300 different knives. Mike Abrusci owns a machete that he purchased from Wallmart, Vos has a Swiss army knife that's still in the packaging and Bobby has been special ordering bushcraft knives from Europe for the past 10 years. Bobby and Vos fight about who has a better bug out bag and who will save their family the best after the end times hit. Who will become the leader of the new world? Max Kelly or Rayna Vos... stay tuned!

Kase Raso is here! We asked him on the podcast to talk about ghost towns and his ethnic identity! We discuss how Katie has a corn face, how Gabby is always hungover on our booze rations and how our new intern tanner is a simple and elegant 8 years of age. Kase is not afraid of French ghosts because they are snobby and smoke cigarettes! Please send us baby supplies for Tanner, we are running low and he has a BAD rash!

Greg Stone, Claire Parker and Mike Abrusci join us in the bunker to have a dead serious discussion about MONSTERS!!!!! Fucking spooky ooky scary sexy monsters, baby! We learn a ton about monster culture, how Claire is a pedophile sympathizer and discuss Tom Hardy for a little bit too long. Greg can battle sirens cause he's a song and dance man! Claire will call the cops on truly anyone because she believes it's illegal to be loud after dark! We love Tom Hardy!

Mike Lawrence and Mike Abrusci join the bunker babies to chat about SUPER VILLIANS!! peuw peuw peuw!!! Mike takes us through the many intricate storylines of comic book fan's favorite villains, we decide what super powers we'd love to have and discuss how Magneto is just a very muscular holocaust survivor! We are starting a Beautopia where we wipe out all the ugly people! Good luck if you're gross! Bye!

Gabe Pacheco joins the girls and the Mike to discuss the Biotech Apocalypse! We chat seed vaults, we play baby menu and we yell “YA GOTTA ROTATE YOUR CROP!” Katie has been scared of bioterrorism since she was a nervous little girl. Was there bioterrorism poisoning at a salad bar or a salsa bar? Are GMOs good or bad? Regardless, don’t forget “If you’re sad than you’re not hot” - Mike

ANNOUNCEMENT! There were technical difficulties in the bunker and our generator exploded causing us to upload a strange combined episode last week?! But Mike took off his shirt and fixed it!!! This week Sarah Tollemache, Joe List AND Mike Abrusci are here to chat about EMPs, Solar Flares and Surviving off the grid! We learn that tics rape your blood if you don't flick em off. Mike recently walked into the woods in tiny short and yelled "Have at it Boys" to all the tics! Lymes disease keeps you thin! Listen now and don't forget to pop a guide book in your go bag you stupid bitch.

Joe List joins Mike Abrusci thus joining us to chat about EXPLOSIONS particularly NUCLEAR ONES. We chat about how Bomb Test sights are now open for tours, creepy bomb names and how Tom Cruise is ill. Joe is a self proclaimed card, a real cut up! Mike used to be obsessed with chem trails and now he just hopes his mom lives! It was also revealed that the night before Katie watched a bunch of 50s propaganda videos and Gabby watched 3 consecutive vampire films so they are both completely and utterly single! Don't forget to store water like we've been FUCKING TELLING YOU.

Mike Feeney and Mike Abrusci are here to chat about VOLCANOS!!!!! Volcanos are cool because they destroy entire civilizations and because lava! We chat about when Mount Vesuvius blew a big fat load and froze the people of pompeii into different sex positions! We talk about how Mikes dad has a chunk of lava rock and thats sweet as hell! We all have lava PTSD and the D stands for Dantes Peak! Get a particle mask, it's fashionable and hides your herpes outbreak! LAVA!!!!!

Raj Sivaraman and Mike Abrusci join us in the bunker to chat about EBOLA!!!!! Everyones going to bleed from their eyes sooner or later, why not today on Apodcalypse! Raj is not only a comedian he is also a scientist! Mike believes that if you eat meat you might as well eat a dog on camera! We just got a 5 star review that reads "barely informative"! Rock and roll!!!!!

Sean Patton and Mike Abrusci hip hop on down to the bunker to chat about the 6th Mass Extinction that's NEWS FLASH already happening! Sean was in New Orleans during Hurricane Katrina so we are sure he is an apocalypse master. He also has a bunch of knives! He thinks that we should buy lady knifes and we are strongly considering it! Mike doesn't have a knife but he has a knife tattooed on him so he's still in the game! Katie also teaches us how to be a minimalist without being annoying! Bye!

Dan Soder joins us in the bunker to leave podcast clues for his grandson who's listening in the future! Follow the messages in the 3,000 podcasts your papa has done and you will find the answers you seek!!!!!! We also chat about the impending tech apocalypse, the AI take over and how Mike Abrusci calls sex dolls "Dollys". Dan has a go bag and it's filled with snacks! Mike can turn a robot off just by touching it because he turns off everyone he touches! Katie wants to get downloaded into a robot thats shaped like a cute lady bug! Bye!!!!

On this weeks episode of your favorite podcast, we discuss how and when we'll escape to Canada! Our bunkers resident therapy dog Alex Pavone and our bunkers resident ‘boy you fucks’ Mike Abrusci join the gals to discuss how to easily get across the border, The War of 1812 when Canada burned down the White House and when they got drilled with three diseases! Alex survived SARS and tells us that oeuf means eggs! Katie knows what an Inuit is! We’re all going to Zombie Adult Summer Camp! Bye!

Two Mikes, Mike Cannon & Mike Abrusci, join us in this baby bunker to discuss Nibiru, Planet X and how it is most definitely REAL! We also discuss the unique tilt of Uranus, how a lot of people love god but don't love math and how Mike Abrusci has seen a bunch of rocks. Mike Cannon fingers our resident alien "Bleep Bloop" and now legally can not come back. It's not cheating on your wife if it's in different dimensions. Bye!

Ever wonder what the dating landscape will be like after the imminent flooding and disease? We decided to bring in THE dating professional, all the way from the other corner of the podcast universe, Corinne Fisher! We're also talking about magic and Mike Abrusci is also here! Listen now to hear about iconic witches such as Silver Raven Wolf, Nostradamus and Ole’ Hag Face. We’ve got some signature spells, some apocalyptic love horoscopes and 77% of an eye of newt! Charmed is back and the TSA has an instagram! Bye!

Kenny Deforest and Mike Abrusci join us to chat all about the ins and outs of the Bunker Business! There are million dollar bunkers, there are blue collar bunkers and there are single lady bunkers filled with a bunch sassy gals. Hurry and grab a knapsack of little special things for YOUR bunker! Kenny's bringing a phonograph! Mikes bringing his cat for love and a kettle bell 'cause he's very strong! We're talking' bunkers BABY!

Leah Bonnema comes on down to bunker town to chat about tunnels, mole people and how the fictional book she read was absolute fact! There are a bunch of Romanians living in tunnels, listening to club music and doing whip-its under Bucharest! Their leader is named Bruce Lee and this is true!