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Parents Who Think

Parents Who Think
Author: Danusia Malina-Derben
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© Parents Who Think formerly School for Mothers
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The Parents Who Think debate podcast interrupts our parenting status quo. Join Danusia Malina-Derben entrepreneur, author and mother of 10 for no-holds-barred debates between intelligent parents with diverse perspectives as they deliver raw and unfiltered opinions on crucial parenting dilemmas. Whether you see yourself as a mainstream parent or embrace ‘marginalized’ views, PWT injects clarity into the hard realities of parenthood. Agreement is not the goal in the show; it’s about finding your unique path in the messy, real-world chaos of raising kids. Flex your agency, think, and redefine modern parenthood with PWT, where debate is done different.
328 Episodes
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What happens when your child’s diagnosis doesn’t just change your daily routine, it changes your entire business model? In this episode of Parents Who Think, Danusia Malina-Derben talks with psychologist and executive coach Jessica Chivers about how motherhood redefines ambition, and reshapes working life in ways no corporate handbook prepares you for. Jessica opens up about navigating exclusions, assessments, and school meetings while building a business, and how that tension has led her to become even more ambitious. They discuss the myth that self-employment is the golden ticket for mothers, the grief of an underdeveloped self, and the underestimated power of honesty in leadership. This is a vital conversation for anyone balancing strategy decks with school runs, or wondering if the entrepreneurial dream is actually a backup plan gone wrong. Listen in, and feel seen. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
What does risk really look like when you're a mother and when you're not willing to blow up your life to chase a dream? In this episode, Danusia is joined by entrepreneur Colleen Wong, who talks about building her business on calculated risks, not chaos. They get into what happens when your startup is hacked by a government body, how to run a company with four mothers in customer service and zero face-time expectations, and why Colleen feels absolutely no guilt about the way she works, or parents. This isn’t about glorifying hustle or soft-focus family life. It’s about building something that sticks, even when everything else tilts sideways. And if you want more conversations like this - the ones that go deeper than the usual soundbites - search Parents Who Think Substack in your browser and join the community. Come be part of it. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
In this episode of Parents Who Think, Danusia Malina-Derben sits down with Zoe Blaskey to explore what it really takes to stay connected to yourself when everyone else seems to come first. Zoe, founder and author of Motherkind and mother of two talks openly about the difference between performing wellness and actually tending to yourself. Together, she and Danusia unpack how easy it is to get lost in parenting, why journaling can be a lifeline (not a luxury), and the micro-practices that help keep self-worth on the radar. There’s no preachy perfection here, just two women naming the quiet crisis of mothering without tending to the mother. This conversation is a gentle gut-punch for anyone who’s been last on their own list for too long. If you’ve ever needed permission to prioritise yourself, you’ve just found it. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
Journalist and author Matt Blake joins Parents Who Think host Danusia Malina-Derben for a candid conversation about what it actually means to co-parent equally. Since his daughter was born, Matt has shared care 50/50 with her mother, through relationship shifts, career trade-offs, and a system that still assumes mothers carry the load. Together, Matt and Danusia explore how parenting redefines ambition, what changes when men stop being treated as babysitters, and why the metrics of ‘success’ look very different when your week is split between deadlines and the school run. Matt shares his experience of being pushed to the sidelines by GP registration forms and playground assumptions and why he’s stayed committed to showing up, even when it means saying no to work. This episode speaks to anyone reshaping the traditional script, whether you’re a father, a mother, or rethinking what family looks like in real life. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
What if everything we thought we knew about screen time was the wrong conversation? In this episode, Danusia Malina-Derben joins Jordan Shapiro for a refreshingly grounded take on parenting in the digital age. Together, they unpack why most debates around tech and children are missing the point. Jordan challenges the obsession with duration, how long a child is online, and instead urges parents to look at quality: What are kids doing? Who are they connecting with? What values are being shaped? This is a wide-ranging and deeply human discussion about how parents can actually mentor their children through a digital landscape, rather than fear it. Expect thoughtful critique, sharp metaphors, and the kind of parenting insight that doesn’t come wrapped in guilt. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
Becoming a mother isn’t just a personal change but a profound identity transformation on par with adolescence. In this episode of Parents Who Think, Danusia Malina-Derben is joined by Dr. Aurélie Athan, clinical psychologist and scholar of reproductive identity, whose groundbreaking work on matrescence reframes motherhood as a major developmental passage. Together, they unpack how motherhood alters our physiology, status, relationships, economics, spirituality, and sense of self, and why recognising these shifts matters more than ever in today’s fractured support landscape. This is a conversation that reshapes how we think about mothers, not as a monolith, but as individuals on distinct and complex reproductive journeys. From delayed childbearing to chosen childlessness, from postpartum crisis to existential reawakening, Aurélie and Danusia delve into the real universals of becoming, and being, a mother. It’s not about ticking boxes. It’s about honouring the full, evolving story. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
In this episode of Parents Who Think, Danusia Malina-Derben speaks with Laura Vanderkam—author, researcher, and mother of five—about time. Not just how we spend it, but how we talk about it. Laura’s work tracks how high-achieving women actually use their hours, and what she found flies in the face of everything we’ve been told: the women she studied weren’t burned out, short-fused, or collapsing in heaps at the end of each day. Danusia and Laura get into it: why our cultural myths around ‘busy women’ persist, how remote work has reshaped everything from commutes to childcare, and what happens when you zoom out from the day-to-day panic and look at time over a full week. This conversation refuses the tired narrative that success for women is always a breathless, collapsing compromise. Instead, it’s a quiet rebellion—a reclaiming of time, energy, and joy. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
In this episode of Parents Who Think, host Danusia Malina-Derben is joined by Marisa Peer to discuss why “I am enough” is more than a mantra, it’s a psychological reset that ripples through families. Drawing on decades of therapeutic work and her own personal evolution, Marisa unpacks how societal norms, school gate competition, and everyday self-criticism shape our belief systems. From writing affirmations on mirrors to embedding them in passwords, she offers inventive, memorable ways to anchor self-worth. They explore gendered pressure, the damage of perfection myths, and why so many parents still chase external validation. Danusia shares her own journey of “marrying herself,” raising triplets, and learning to create joy in chaos. This is a conversation about repetition, ritual, and radical self-acceptance. One that reminds us: your children learn from what you model, and you are allowed to speak to yourself with love. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
What happens when a woman writes the truth the world isn’t ready to hear? In this episode of Parents Who Think, host Danusia Malina-Derben joins Erica Jong, novelist, poet, and unapologetic icon, in a conversation about the power and price of honesty. They explore how female jealousy gets buried in family and friendship, how mothers and daughters carry inherited pain, and why admitting negative emotions is still radical. Erica reflects on the terror of writing Fear of Flying, the myth of zipless fucks, and why she’s always preferred warm and cuddly sex to bodice-ripping fantasy. From literary rebellion to maternal ambivalence, this episode offers rare insight into what it means to be a woman who speaks her mind, and refuses to apologise for it. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
In this episode of Parents Who Think, Danusia Malina-Derben joins Ken Mossman for a layered and moving conversation about modern masculinity, emotional maturity, and what it means to be an integrated man. Ken brings wit and wisdom to topics most men were never taught to face: how to play, how to feel, and how to take responsibility without shame or performance. They explore why so many men exile parts of themselves, like their inner child or rebellious adolescent, and what’s possible when those voices are finally welcomed home. Ken also shares what it looks like to meet children where they are, and how one moment with his four-year-old son changed everything he thought he knew about parenting. This is not your typical fatherhood talk. It’s about presence, power, and the radical responsibility of being a fully formed human, on purpose. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
Parents Who Think host Danusia Malina-Derben joins Clare Pooley in an unflinching conversation about motherhood, sobriety, and the silent unraveling that so often hides behind ‘wine o’clock’.” Together, Clare and Danusia speak frankly about alcohol as a socially sanctioned drug, the seductive myths around moderation, and the messy, non-linear journey of quitting. Clare offers sharp insights for those wondering if their drinking has crept too far, and shares what it means to live fully, vividly, and without blurring the edges. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
In this episode of Parents Who Think, Danusia Malina-Derben talks with Stuart Lawrence, teacher, author, and younger brother of Stephen Lawrence, about what it means to carry grief and use it as a tool for change. Stuart reflects on stepping into a leadership role in his family after Stephen’s murder, navigating the long and painful road toward justice, and discovering his own purpose through education and public speaking. He shares intimate memories of his brother, the confusion and pain of dealing with systemic failure, and how his mother’s strength and clarity became the foundation for everything that followed. Together, Danusia and Stuart explore what it means to raise a Black son in Britain today, how to instil hope without dishonesty, and why personal action, no matter how small, is never wasted. Stuart’s work in schools, his books Silence is Not an Option and Growing Up Black in Britain, and his belief in the power of education shine throughout this conversation. This is an episode about personal responsibility, family legacy, and how to keep going when the fight was never supposed to be yours, but you take it up anyway. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
Danusia Malina-Derben talks with Rosie Sherry about what it really means to educate and parent outside the system. Rosie, a home educator and founder of a global tech community, shares the story of pulling her children out of school—not out of rebellion, but out of radical care. What followed wasn’t just a change in schooling—it was a reordering of her entire life. Together, Danusia and Rosie talk about the mismatch between modern schooling and real children, the pressure for constant peer socialising, and why introverted kids often get left behind. Rosie also reflects on building a business while home educating five kids, what success looks like when you stop chasing other people’s definitions, and why she no longer wants to “scale” just because she can. This is a conversation about instinct, discernment, and the quiet power of doing things differently. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
Eldra Jackson doesn’t soften the truth. And he doesn’t offer redemption stories tied up in a bow. In this conversation, he speaks openly about the crimes that led to his 24-year prison sentence and the deeper inner work that began long after the bars closed behind him. Danusia Malina-Derben, host of Parents Who Think, joins Eldra to explore what happens when men are taught that power depends on domination—and what unfolds when trauma goes unnamed. And what it means to take full responsibility not just for your past, but for the impact you still have on others every day. They discuss his turning point in solitary confinement, his choice to step away from gang life, and how spiritual and emotional discipline helped him begin again. This episode offers a profound and grounded look at change—not the glossy kind, but the kind forged in silence, self-inquiry, and discomfort. Eldra speaks not just to those who’ve done harm, but to anyone who wants to stop running from the truth and start doing better. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
When Suzy Walker began a mindfulness course, she didn’t expect it to unearth a lifetime of suppressed grief. But in conversation with Danusia Malina-Derben, host of Parents Who Think, what unfolds is a raw, honest reflection on what happens when we stop running, and start listening. Danusia and Suzy explore the seductive trap of busyness, the spiritual disorientation of stillness, and the hidden grief we mask with productivity. Together, they unpack what it means to be present in a culture that values performance over peace, and why women, especially mothers, struggle with simply being. From Whitstable beach meditations to missed flights and social media audits, this is a fiercely intelligent, intimate exchange between two women unafraid to question what success, selfhood, and service really mean. A reminder that we don’t have to do more to be more, and that sometimes the most radical move is to be still. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
What does real equality look like when you're parenting solo? In this moving conversation, Danusia interviews Michael Ray, a father who’s raising his daughter on his own after her mother stepped away from their lives. What might sound like a tough beginning becomes a powerful dialogue on parenting, presence, and the messy realities of gendered expectations. Michael shares what it means to parent with depth and integrity—how he built his work life around his daughter’s needs, and why respect for her mother remains non-negotiable. We talk about how men are still applauded for showing up as parents, while women are expected to carry the full load with little recognition. We also get into why equality initiatives often fail, because they don’t come with a redistribution of domestic labour. This conversation isn’t only about lone parenting. It’s about the emotional labour of raising children well, the cultural rewiring men need to do, and how raising a daughter changed Michael’s entire outlook on power, gender, and responsibility. If you think you’ve heard every take on fatherhood, think again. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
If you think menopause is just hot flashes and mood swings, Meg Mathews is here to set you straight. In this unfiltered episode, Meg opens up about how menopause knocked her sideways—crippling anxiety, misdiagnosis, zero libido—and how it took years before anyone mentioned hormones. That journey led to Meg’s Menopause, a platform busting taboos and pushing for real education, access, and self-respect. We cover it all—testosterone, bone health, dry everything, and the identity shifts no one warns you about. Meg tells it like it is: women aren’t broken, they’re just not being told the truth. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
What does it really mean to be a good dad in a world that’s (finally) rethinking power, privilege, and gender? Jordan Shapiro offers a fresh framework—one that demands more than just ‘helping out’ or being ‘the fun one.’ In this episode, we talk about radical inclusivity, critical consciousness, and why patriarchal manliness needs a total rethink. Jordan doesn’t dodge the difficult stuff—he names the creepy undercurrents of the “daddy as first boyfriend” trope and unpacks why so many men feel attacked when the cultural tide changes. We cover big ideas, big shifts, and the kind of inner work modern fatherhood really requires. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
We’re told to be selfless. To give everything for our children. To die to ourselves for the sake of being a “good” mother and parent. But what if that’s not the answer at all? In this fierce, funny, and deeply real conversation, Danusia is joined by Meredith Masony —a woman who came back from a health crisis with one loud, clear truth: she was done putting herself last. They talk about the myth of the perfect mum, what happens when you carry the entire domestic load for a decade, and why sometimes the most radical thing a mother can do is say, “It’s my turn.” This episode is a battle cry for any woman who’s been told she’s selfish for wanting more. If that’s you? Tune in. We saved you a seat. Discover more from us: • Join the PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Inquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram
This episode, I speak with Simon Squibb, founder of HelpBnk and author of What’s Your Dream? We dive into cultivating luck (hint: it’s not random), why desperation can be a creative superpower, and how his mother kicking him out of the house became the very thing that made him. Simon shares his raw take on privilege, failure, and the myth of the A-grade life. We talk resilience, drive, and what it means to burn the boats and go all in—even if you don’t know how to hold a garden spade. You’ll leave this one fired up. Maybe even rethinking your whole idea of risk. Discover more from us: • Join PWT community on Substack • Follow us on Instagram • Connect with Danusia • Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts • Advertising Enquiries here Credits: • Hosted by Danusia Malina-Derben • Edited, Mixed + Mastered by Marie Cruz • Cover art by Anthony Oram