David’s Thoughts

A cheap knockoff the real thing, it’s a David’s Thought podcast

Uniformed uniformed officers of the dumb brigade

The cats interrupt me on this one. Good thing too, I was planning a murder. But no siree the cats were not gonna have that!

I fail to understand reality in this one. Send help.

The mayor Mayonnaise was quickly regretted by the populace as he smelled funny and no knew how past his expiration date he was

I get down on onion soup mix and devalue Candy Crush in two separate take downs. Also story time.

Oh where oh where did my thoughts have gone. Oh where oh where could they be?

I realize I was an idiot and didn't upload something correctly and YOU'LL NEVER BELIEVE DAVID'S THIRD THOUGHT!

When thought gremlins attack!

I bees back!

Hiatus? From cheaply some four minute podcasts that take 10 to make? Yep kids, I am sucking big time at getting other stuff dune so this goes on the back burner. Don't worry! It will return in good time. Like, when I get a job and a subsequent commute.

Who would have thought that a Mars joke would spark an international armed conflict? Not Third Street Elementary School's PE teacher Cheryl Franklin. "Listen, I just meant it to be a lesson on astrophysics but I had no idea that it would have been so offensive." The teacher faces a charge that carries up to four years in a maximum security anti-joke prison.

Somehow I keep forgetting to publish these. ATTEMPT THREE

This one was supposed to be uploaded now for two days and have blown it twice in a row. I am so good at this!

Who doesn't use duct tape as a permanent fix. Never in my life have I ever used duct tape as a temporary fix. Could explain why all the people keep falling off my ceiling though

Budgeting is a crime now

Babies are getting high marks for creative crediting and advanced warfare tactics. Well played babies, well played

Do you ever wonder where your discarded q-tips go? I'm not talking about the ones you keep to make shrines to your favorite actor or whatever. Wait, I'm the only one who does this?

So you find the dog in the living room with the end of a broken shovel. It's covered in powdered sugar. The dog turns to you and says, "that's gonna be a sticky mess. Care to help out?"

We all know someone who is really good at not being really good at anything. Perhaps that's who I am