Zen Pop Parenting

Cathy and Todd discuss Die Hard, the 1988 action classic that redefined the genre, covering everything from its Christmas Eve plot and iconic Nakatomi Plaza setting to the film’s surprisingly heartfelt themes of family, reconciliation, and love. They discuss why so many (including Cathy) consider it a Christmas movie, break down the characters and casting surprises, highlight the film’s legacy and genre-shaping influence, and share the behind-the-scenes stories that made Bruce Willis’s hero an unexpected cultural icon. From Hans Gruber’s unforgettable villainy to the film’s “Die Hard in a ____” effect across decades of action films, it’s a nostalgic and big-hearted look at why this movie endures and why so many of us return to it every holiday season. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

Cathy and Todd discuss the making of Toy Story, the 1995 film that changed animation forever. They explore the film’s massive cultural impact and the introduction of emotionally complex heroes like Woody and Buzz, who grew up alongside their audience. They also look at the creative forces behind the movie, including John Lasseter’s rise and fall and the way Pixar rebuilt its culture in the wake of industry reckonings. They dive into the random facts, hidden jokes, emotional details, and psychological layers that make the movie endlessly rewatchable, from Randy Newman’s music to Sid’s misunderstood chaos. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

Cathy and Todd discuss Forrest Gump,  a movie they’ve loved for years, one they even saw together when it first came out. They explore how this emotional epic serves as both parable and modern American myth, following Forrest’s innocence through some of the country’s most turbulent moments while Jenny’s life reflects a very different America marked by trauma, rebellion, and survival. They dig into the ongoing debate over whether Forrest Gump deserved to win Best Picture over Pulp Fiction and The Shawshank Redemption, and laugh about how many lines from the movie have become part of their everyday conversations. This is the third film in our Tom Hanks month – we’ve already covered Big and Cast Away, and next week we’ll wrap up with Toy Story. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

Cathy and Todd continue Tom Hanks Month with Cast Away, the 2000 classic that came out just as the world was speeding up with email, cell phones, and the dot-com boom. They talk about how this quiet, lonely movie made such an impact and why it hit so differently in an era obsessed with productivity and control. They go through their categories and favorite scenes to share what makes the movie so memorable, and then “roll in the deep” about what makes it so meaningful – from Chuck’s relationship with Wilson to his final crossroads, and what the story says about time, survival, and what it means to really be alive. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

To kick off Tom Hanks month, Cathy and Todd revisit Big, the 1988 classic that made him a star and reminded us what it means to grow up too fast. The movie blends humor, heart, and magic (and a somewhat inappropriate romance), letting us laugh at the absurdity of adult life while remembering what it felt like to be young. They talk about why Big still matters, why friendship is at the core of the story, and how Penny Marshall’s direction brought depth to a wild premise. They also discuss what the story reveals about growing up, parenting, and the pressure to “perform” adulthood. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

Cathy and Todd discuss Se7en, David Fincher’s dark and unforgettable thriller. They talk about how the movie came together from the casting of Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman to the decision to keep Kevin Spacey’s role a secret, and how Fincher’s style changed what crime movies could be. They also dig into the story’s moral questions, the infamous ending, and why Se7en still hits just as hard today as it did in 1995. They also talk about how the film shaped Fincher’s career and how the seven deadly sins still show up in our culture. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

Cathy and Todd discuss The Haunting of Hill House and how Mike Flanagan turned a classic ghost story into an emotional story of family trauma, grief, and repair. From the houses we grew up in to the ghosts we still carry, they talk about the energy that lingers and the monsters we end up sympathizing with. They discuss why Hill House hit Gen X so deeply, how it flipped horror into therapy, made the supernatural feel like emotional realism, and showed that the scariest hauntings are simply the things our families were never willing to talk about. It’s a conversation about home, loss, and what happens when we finally stop running from our ghosts and choose to accept, forgive, and integrate our past. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

Released in 2008, Twilight dropped into a perfect cultural storm with Obama’s election, iPhones taking off, emo Tumblr in full swing, and the YA craze exploding after Harry Potter. Catherine Hardwicke’s film felt raw and indie with blue-grey filters, handheld cameras, and the emotional awkwardness of being seventeen. It wasn’t polished Hollywood fantasy; it was sincere and strange, which made it real to the girls and women who saw themselves in Bella’s clumsy intensity. The story of a human girl who falls for a vampire who might kill her, mixed romance, danger, and repression in a way that was both thrilling and uncomfortable. It gave us Edward’s brooding abstinence, Jacob’s rivalry, baseball in a thunderstorm, and that unforgettable line: “Hold on tight, spider monkey.” It was about longing, isolation, and the fantasy of being truly seen, a theme that shaped a generation’s idea of love. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

When Scream hit theaters in 1996, horror was stuck in a loop of sequels and fading scares. What made Scream different was its sharp, self-aware, and deeply Gen X voice. It mocked the rules of slashers while playing by them, spoke the language of VHS rentals and MTV, and turned Ghostface into an instant icon. In this episode, we look at how Scream captured a generation’s worldview, why Millennials later made it their own, and how it reshaped horror for everything that came after. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile Summary When Scream hit theaters in 1996, horror was stuck in a loop of sequels and fading scares. What made Scream different was its sharp, self-aware, and deeply Gen X voice. It mocked the rules of slashers while playing by them, spoke the language of VHS rentals and MTV, and turned Ghostface into an instant icon. In this episode, we look at how Scream captured a generation’s worldview, why Millennials later made it their own, and how it reshaped horror for everything that came after. Horror Movies and Parenting Insights Stuey and Kathy introduce their podcast episode, “Zen Pop Parenting,” which focuses on a deeper analysis of horror movies, including Scream, as part of their “Spooky Season” series. They discuss the movie’s themes of depth, humor, and meta-commentary on horror genres, and plan to cover Twilight and The Haunting of Hill House in upcoming episodes. Stuey mentions Kathy’s book, “Restoring Our Girls,” as a potential Halloween gift. The episode aims to explore personal connections to horror while providing entertainment and reflection. Scream: A Gen X Horror Classic Stuey discussed the 1996 film Scream, explaining its plot, characters, and cultural significance. He noted that the movie was a Gen X film, featuring actors of their age group, and served as a reboot of the horror genre. Stuey also compared Scream to Halloween, highlighting how the two films represented different eras of movie-watching experiences for different generations. Movie Budget and Horror Preferences Stuey discussed the success of a movie with a $15 million budget that grossed over $170 million worldwide. He shared his personal preferences for horror movies, explaining that he can watch them but is often distracted by the presence of a boom mic holder, unlike his partner who covers her eyes. Stuey also mentioned his experience watching the Scream series, noting that he prefers anticipation over graphic violence. He played a game of “two truths and a lie” related to the Scream franchise, and they discussed how phone etiquette has changed over time. Scream’s Influence on Horror Films Stuey discussed the creation and references of the horror film Scream, including its writer Kevin Williamson’s inspiration from a documentary about Danny Rowling and the use of the Ghostface mask. He highlighted the film’s influence on caller ID usage and its references to other horror movies like Halloween, Friday the 13th, and A Nightmare on Elm Street. Stuey also mentioned that Neve Campbell was nearly typecast in horror films due to her role in Scream and The Craft. Scream Movie Trivia Discussion Stuey shared interesting trivia about the “Scream” movie, including how Matthew Lillard wasn’t supposed to audition but landed the role of Stu, and how Courtney Cox met her husband David Arquette on set. They discussed the movie’s plot, including the motive for the killings and Stu’s unique character. Stuey also pointed out some inconsistencies in the movie, such as the ease with which the killer moves the victim and the trope of a boyfriend sneaking into his girlfriend’s bedroom, which is common in 80s movies. Garage Door Safety in Movies Stuey discussed the unrealistic portrayal of garage door safety in a movie scene and criticized the 1980s-style depiction of teenagers being killed by TVs. He also analyzed the rules for surviving horror movies, as outlined by the character Randy in the film Scream, which include avoiding sex, drugs, and making promises to return. Horror Movie Rules and Tropes Stuey discussed various horror movie tropes and rules, including not going outside for strange noises, not splitting up, and not asking who’s there. He also highlighted specific examples from the movie “Scream,” such as Sydney following her own advice by going out the front door. Stuey introduced a new category called “Hidden Gems,” which includes actors’ cameos and small details that viewers might not notice on first viewing. He mentioned Linda Blair’s brief appearance in the film and the interesting fact that the high school scenes were initially meant to be shot at Santa Rosa High School but had to be moved due to the school board’s concerns about the film’s violent content. Scream’s Humorous and Unengaging Elements Stuey discussed the comedic elements in the movie “Scream,” particularly focusing on the unintentional tripping of the Ghostface character, which added a humorous touch to the film. He also expressed his lack of interest in the “Hall Pass” section, specifically the character Dewey, played by David Arquette, whom he found unengaging and unnecessary to the plot. Stuey compared Dewey’s character to a less successful “Friends” episode, highlighting the lack of humor and coherence in the storyline. Rolling in the Deep Analysis Stuey discussed the film “Rolling in the Deep,” focusing on Sydney’s unresolved trauma from her mother’s murder and Billy’s inappropriate response to her grief. He criticized the film’s portrayal of Sydney as a tease and its misogynistic undertones. Stuey also explored themes of grief and betrayal in the movie, noting how horror films often use these emotions to create fear. He emphasized that betrayal, like grief, is a significant fear for humans due to the sense of isolation it brings. Self-Awareness in Meta Movies Stuey discussed the concept of meta movies, explaining that they are self-aware and comment on themselves and their genre. He used the example of “Scream” to illustrate this, noting its references to other horror movies and its self-referential nature. Stuey also mentioned that they and Todd had decided not to include “Children of the Corn” in their spooky season lineup due to its poor quality. Horror Meta and Cultural Impact Stuey discussed the meta aspects of horror movies, particularly Scream, and how they subvert audience expectations while still engaging with genre conventions. He noted that horror films are relatively low-risk investments for studios due to their consistent profitability, whether successful or not. Stuey also highlighted the film’s cultural impact, including its influence on subsequent meta-horror works like Scary Movie and Cabin in the Woods. The discussion concluded with a music game, where Stuey chose Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” to relate to the film’s self-aware critique of genre tropes, and he announced that the next meeting would focus on Twilight.

Cathy and Todd revisit John Carpenter’s Halloween, the 1978 film that cost just over $300,000 to make and went on to shape the slasher genre. For Gen X kids, it was more than a scary movie, it was a cultural milestone. They talk about why the suburban setting felt so close to home, how a cheap William Shatner mask turned into Michael Myers, and why Laurie Strode became the blueprint for the “final girl.” They also point out the small details you might miss on rewatch, talk about the film’s influence on later directors, and share their favorite final girls and boogeymen from the entire horror genre. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

Airplane! hit theaters in 1980 and reshaped comedy for Gen X. It was a clear break from the more earnest films of the ’70s and set the tone for how parody and absurdist humor would play out for decades. By casting serious actors like Leslie Nielsen, Lloyd Bridges & Robert Stack to deliver nonsense with total sincerity, the Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker team created a template that influenced everything from The Naked Gun and Hot Shots! to the joke-a-minute rhythm of The Simpsons, 30 Rock, and Community. It wasn’t just a hit movie; it changed the way comedy looked and sounded going forward. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile Summary Airplane” Comedy Podcast Discussion In this episode of Zen Top Parenting, hosts Todd and Kathy Adams discuss their decision to focus on the classic comedy film “Airplane” for their latest podcast, choosing it over other contemporary pop culture topics. They introduce new podcast categories, including jokes that went over their heads as children and a game called “Two Truths and One Lie” about the movie. Todd shares his “lukewarm” take on “Airplane” as the best comedy ever, reflecting on how childhood experiences shape one’s appreciation of humor. Airplane!’s Cultural Comedy Impact Ted discussed the cultural impact and production background of the 1980 comedy film “Airplane!” He highlighted its rapid-fire humor, with approximately one joke every 30 seconds, and its influence on comedy. Ted explained that the film was directed by Jim Abrams and Jerry and David Zucker, who also wrote it, and it spoofed the 1957 disaster film “Zero Hour.” He noted that the ZAZ partnership, which included Abrams, Zucker, and David Zucker, created “Airplane!” after watching and parodying commercials for “Zero Hour.” Airplane: Comedy and Cultural Impact Ted discussed the film “Airplane,” highlighting its alignment with the spoof genre and its replication of scenes from the serious film “Zero Hour.” He explained the plot, characters, and comedic elements of “Airplane,” noting its 1970s cultural references and the actors’ initial confusion about their roles due to the film’s comedic approach. Ted emphasized the importance of committed performances and writing in comedy, referencing Amy Poehler’s podcast and the film’s influence on later works like “Hot Shots.” Airplane!” Humor Reflections Ted and his friend discussed jokes and scenes from the movie “Airplane!” that went over their heads when they first watched it as children in the 1980s. They reflected on their limited understanding of certain humor and cultural references at the time, noting how the film’s jokes and stereotypes were a product of its era. They also mentioned the movie’s use of background jokes and cameos, highlighting its innovative approach to comedy. Airplane!’s Comedy Legacy Impact Ted discussed the cultural impact and influence of the movie “Airplane!” on comedy, highlighting its use of deadpan humor, parody, and rapid-fire jokes. He shared interesting facts about the movie’s production, casting, and profitability, as well as its legacy on subsequent films and TV shows. Ted emphasized how “Airplane!” inspired a generation of comedies, including “Naked Gun,” “Top Secret,” “Hot Shots,” and “30 Rock,” by blending absurd humor with serious actors. Airplane!” Comedy and Trivia Ted discussed the film “Airplane!” and its cultural impact, highlighting inappropriate content and the influence of comedy. He shared trivia about the movie, including improvisations, casting choices, and production details. Ted also mentioned a game of “Two Truths and a Lie” and corrected some misconceptions about the film’s production. He concluded by suggesting further research on Matt Damon’s involvement in “30 Rock” and airport-related content. Controversial Humor in ‘Airplane! Ted and Carol discussed the film “Airplane!” and its controversial content, including sexual and violent scenes, as well as outdated humor. They also criticized the American Film Institute’s ranking of “Airplane!” as one of the funniest movies of all time, questioning the comedic value of some of the other films on the list. They reflected on generational differences in humor preferences and noted that some modern films, like “What About Bob?” were better received by younger audiences than “Airplane!” or “Austin Powers.” Pop Culture and Retail Anecdotes Ted shared his thoughts on various pop culture references, including jokes and quotes from a movie involving a character named George Zipp and a scene with a credit card machine. He also discussed a plot line involving a girl needing a heart transplant and her connection to The Love Boat. Ted mentioned working in retail and his experience with credit card machines, comparing it to a scene in the movie. Movie Memories and Humor Ted and Todd discussed various topics, including smoking on airplanes, the movie Airplane!, and the comedic lines from its cast. They also talked about the movie’s humor and the actor Johnny, who died young. Ted mentioned that he and his parents watched several movies together, some of which were not suitable for children. They also discussed the movie Raiders of the Lost Ark and the command “Shep, sit!” related to a family dog. Gen X Humor: Inside Jokes Explained Ted and his friend discussed Gen X humor, which includes sarcasm, deadpan delivery, parody, and irony. They explored how this humor often involves inside jokes and cultural references that require a certain level of understanding. Ted shared examples from TV shows like 30 Rock and The Summer I Turned Pretty, highlighting how callbacks and background gags contribute to this style of humor. They also discussed their shared love for magazines like Mad and Cracked, which influenced their appreciation for this type of humor. Gen X Parody Film Insights Ted and his companion discussed various parody films, with Airplane! and Naked Gun highlighted as top favorites. They shared insights into Gen X humor, emphasizing its dry, ironic, and discerning nature, often used in parenting to teach children to see absurdity and question authority. They also discussed the influence of the Zucker Brothers and Abrams on comedy and shared personal anecdotes about movies and music, including a missed opportunity to see Steve Miller Band live. The conversation concluded with a review of a short parody film and a plan to continue the discussion next Tuesday.

Jenny Han’s The Summer I Turned Pretty is rooted in Gen X pop culture, taking inspiration from 80s movies to the soundtrack choices that set the mood. In this episode, we connect Belly’s summer at Cousins Beach to the stories that shaped us, from Jane Austen to John Hughes, from Dirty Dancing to Taylor Swift. We’ll talk about the love triangles that defined movies, books, and TV, count down the best song moments ever, and dig into the easter eggs and symbolism that make this show so fun to watch. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile Summary Gen X TV Show Analysis The team discussed their upcoming podcast episode about “Gen X Literacy of the Summer,” which will focus on the TV show “PreTTY” and its cultural significance. They plan to explore themes like love triangles, music in storytelling, and Easter eggs, while avoiding spoilers for the series finale. The hosts, including Todd and Kathy, shared personal connections to the show and its characters, emphasizing its relevance for Gen X audiences and as a conversation starter with their children. They aim to provide a deep dive into the show’s cultural references and its impact on popular culture. The Summer I Turned Pretty” Adaptation The team discussed the plot and characters of a TV show based on the “The Summer I Turned Pretty” book series. They covered the main storyline involving Belly, her summer romance with the Fisher brothers, and the family dynamics between the Fisher and Conklin families. The team also explored differences between the books and TV show, including age adjustments and character relationships. They concluded by discussing the show’s adult characters and its literary influences, particularly noting its connection to Jane Austen novels. 1980s Influences in ‘The Summer I Turned Pretty The team discussed the influence of 1980s young adult literature and John Hughes movies on the TV series “The Summer I Turned Pretty.” They noted how the show borrows elements from these sources, such as love triangles and summer-themed narratives, to appeal to audiences who grew up with these stories. Todd shared his own experiences of being too scared to pursue romantic interests during his teenage years, due to fears of rejection and societal pressures. The group also discussed specific scenes in the show that seemed to be inspired by other popular media, like “Titanic” and “Gilmore Girls.” Movie Makeover Transformations and Growth The team discussed various makeover scenes in movies, focusing on characters like Belly, Sandy, and Sabrina, who undergo significant transformations. They explored how these makeovers symbolize personal growth and increased self-awareness for the characters. The group also mentioned influences from classic films like “Sabrina” and “My Fair Lady,” and referenced pop culture moments like Andy’s prom dress in “Pretty in Pink.” The conversation concluded with a brief mention of the TV miniseries “The Thorn Birds,” which was significant to one team member. The Thornbirds” Color Symbolism Analysis The team discussed the TV show “The Thornbirds,” focusing on its themes and character relationships. They explored how the show’s color symbolism, particularly the association of Conrad with red and the ocean, and Jeremiah with blue and the pool, reflects the characters’ personalities and their relationship with the protagonist, Belly. The discussion also touched on the show’s inspiration and how certain character names were chosen. Pop Culture Love Triangle Analysis The team discussed various love triangles in pop culture, including Katniss, Peeta, and Gale from The Hunger Games; Bella, Edward, and Jacob from Twilight; Joey, Pacey, and Dawson from Dawson’s Creek; Andy, Ducky, and Blaine from Pretty in Pink; Carrie, Big, and Aiden; and others like Archie, Betty, Veronica, and Jughead from Archie Comics. They also mentioned Scarlett, Ashley, and Rhett from Gone with the Wind, Elizabeth, Darcy, and Wickham from Pride and Prejudice, and Bridget Jones, Mark Darcy, and Daniel Cleaver from Bridget Jones’s Diary. Love Triangles in Pop Culture The team discussed various love triangles in popular culture, comparing them to each other and analyzing their dynamics. They explored how these triangles have evolved over time, from 1980s films to modern TV shows. The conversation then shifted to detailed analysis of symbolism and Easter eggs in the TV show “Cousins for Christmas,” particularly focusing on the relationship between characters Conrad and Belly. They also discussed the background of the show’s writer, Jenny Han, noting her Gen X influence on the storytelling. Music and Themes in ‘The Summer I Turned Pretty The team discussed music in the TV show “The Summer I Turned Pretty,” noting its use of Gen X and Taylor Swift songs to set the tone. They shared personal favorite song drops from movies and TV shows, with themes of love, loss, and generational significance. The conversation shifted to parenting lessons from the show, including letting kids grow independently and modeling how to handle change and loss. They also discussed the importance of friendship and complexity in teenage life. The conversation ended with a music game and a reminder about the final episode of the show airing the next day, along with recommendations for related content.

Cathy and Todd discuss Netflix’s documentary Unknown Number: The High School Catfish and how texts and constant accessibility blur the line between connection and chaos. What started as “stranger danger” in Gen X childhood has become “tech danger” in our kids’ phones—cyberbullying, rumors, and anonymous numbers lighting up at all hours. The documentary shows how quickly trust can unravel and how phones have become symbols of both intimacy and manipulation. The deeper lesson is that parenting through technology requires more than control or surveillance, it demands emotional maturity, boundaries, and the courage to talk honestly about what’s happening behind the screen. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Dark Side of the Moon Advance Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile AI Summary Catfishing Documentary and Parenting Insights Todd and Sweetie discussed a new documentary called “Unknown Number: The High School Catfish,” directed by Skye Borgman, which tells the story of Lauren and Owen, a teenage couple from a small town in Michigan who were cyberbullied for 22 months. They highlighted the documentary’s relevance to Gen X parenting and its potential to spark discussions about cell phones, emotional maturity, and parenting. Todd and Sweetie also mentioned Sweetie’s book “Restoring Our Girls” and their involvement with Team Zen, offering a free subscription to their Substack newsletter for team members. Parenting in the Digital Age The discussion centered on a documentary about inappropriate text messages sent to a teenage couple in 2020, highlighting the evolving landscape of anonymous communication and its impact on children. Todd shared insights into the differences between Gen X and current parenting experiences, noting the shift from unsupervised childhood activities to heightened technological concerns. He also discussed the decline in child harm statistics despite persistent “stranger danger” fears and shared anecdotes about prank calls and ding-dong ditching, contrasting these with modern parenting practices and the role of technology in children’s lives. Tech Evolution and Parenting Concerns Todd discussed the evolution of communication technologies and their impact on parenting, particularly focusing on the shift from traditional “stranger danger” concerns to modern “tech danger” issues. He traced the development from caller ID and party lines in the 1990s to social media and DMs in the 2010s, noting how smartphones and apps like Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat have changed both children’s experiences and parental concerns about screen time and online safety. Small Town Dynamics and Technology Todd discussed the dynamics of small towns, drawing from his experience growing up in Dekalb, Illinois, and how these dynamics played a role in the documentary. He noted that in wealthier towns, more resources might be directed towards solving issues, and he observed that parents in the town featured in the documentary seemed overinvested in their children’s lives. Todd also shared his memories of early internet technology, including the excitement of getting online and the challenges of using dial-up connections, before transitioning to a discussion about the Blair Witch Project and its impact. Unraveling Threats: A Young Couple’s Story The documentary tells the story of Lauren and Owen, a young couple who were targeted by anonymous text messages in 2020, escalating to 40-50 daily threats and suicidal content. The authorities initially struggled to handle the case, with the sheriff being unhelpful and only involving the FBI after a year. The FBI liaison, Bradley, successfully traced the messages to a Verizon phone number and identified the perpetrator, though the documentary ends before revealing the answer. Cyberbullying Trauma and Misunderstanding The group discussed a documentary about a girl named Lauren who was targeted by cyberbullying, with the shocking revelation that her mother, Kendra Licari, was actually the perpetrator. They explored how Lauren’s seemingly calm reaction to the discovery could be explained by dissociation, a trauma response that protects the brain from overwhelming experiences. The discussion also touched on how society often misinterprets the reactions of trauma survivors, particularly women, and the importance of understanding trauma responses when dealing with such cases. Kendra’s Stalking and Manipulation Case Todd and his friend discussed the documentary “Rolling in the Deep,” focusing on the case of Kendra, a woman who stalked her daughter Lauren and others while claiming her actions were for their protection. Kendra was arrested in December 2022, pleaded guilty to stalking charges, and served 18 months in prison before being released on parole in August 2024. They explored the complex dynamics of the relationship between Kendra and Lauren, including Kendra’s manipulation and emotional abuse, as well as the potential impact of Kendra’s own traumatic experiences on her behavior. Understanding Performance and Factitious Parenting Todd discussed three topics related to parenting: performance parenting, parents living through their children, and factitious disorder by proxy (formerly Munchausen syndrome). He explained that performance parenting involves focusing on surface-level actions rather than genuine emotional connections with children, while parents who live through their children have difficulty separating their own lives from their children’s. Todd also described factitious disorder by proxy, using examples from movies and real-life cases, highlighting how some parents fabricate or induce illnesses in their children for attention or control. Factitious Disorder: Psychological Manipulation Todd discussed factitious disorder, a condition where individuals feign illness or cause harm to others for attention or other motivations. He shared insights from a podcast hosted by Andrea Dunlop, who explores cases of this disorder and its prevalence, noting that mothers are typically the perpetrators while fathers often enable them. Todd highlighted the similarities between the tactics used in factitious disorders and those employed by cult leaders, emphasizing the complex psychological factors at play. Attention-Seeking Behaviors in Children Todd shared personal anecdotes about attention-seeking behaviors in children and discussed a documentary about factitious disorder by proxy, where a mother used technology to manipulate her daughter. He explained how the documentary highlighted how people, including parents, can become overly involved in their children’s lives and the complex dynamics involved. Todd also mentioned a podcast episode he did about 10 years ago related to conscious parenting and ended the segment with a song about a protective mother.

Cathy and Todd talk about two 90s political favorites, Dave and The American President, and how they captured Gen X’s wishful politics. From an ordinary guy running the White House with kindness to a widowed president balancing romance and leadership, both films imagined a world where decency could still win in Washington. They explore what these stories meant in the Clinton era, why they still feel good to watch, and how their themes of authenticity, vulnerability, and optimism show up in the way Gen X parents raise their kids today. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Dark Side of the Moon Advance Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile AI Summary Summary Podcast Shift and Subscription Focus Andrew and Kathy discussed their upcoming podcast episode focused on the movies “The American President” and “Dave,” exploring Gen X idealism and politics. They emphasized the podcast’s shift from Zen Parenting Radio to focus on topics that excite them, such as boy bands and hair bands, and highlighted their subscription offerings, including a newsletter and women’s circle. Andrew also mentioned his book “Restoring Our Girls” and encouraged listeners to join Team Zen for access to various resources and support groups. Political Films and Cultural Context Andrew and his colleague discussed the films Dave and The American President, comparing their casts, settings, and political backdrops. They noted that Dave, released in 1993, reflected a shift in political atmosphere after 12 years of Republican presidents, while The American President, released in 1995, depicted a more partisan and bitter Washington during Clinton’s presidency. They also touched on personal experiences, such as Andrew’s recent visit to Drake University and his research into the 1993 context, including the Waco siege and Michael Jordan’s retirement. Capra Films: Optimism and Nostalgia Andrew discussed the themes and characteristics of Capra-esque films, comparing them to the movies “Dave” and “The American President.” He explained how these films embody optimism, humor, and faith in humanity, contrasting corruption with decency. Andrew also shared personal anecdotes about renting VHS tapes and the nostalgia associated with the VCR era, including a humorous story about a movie store mix-up. Comparing Political Themed Movies Andrew and his companion discussed the movies “Dave” and “The American President,” comparing their themes, genres, and personal preferences. They shared interesting facts about the movies, such as the involvement of Michael J. Fox and Annette Bening, and the use of the Oval Office set in both films. Andrew also mentioned his past habit of watching “The American President” before speaking engagements to stay focused. They briefly touched on the political themes in the movies and the characters’ roles, with Andrew expressing admiration for Annette Bening’s portrayal in “The American President.” Exploring ‘Dave’ and Political Films The group discussed the film Dave, including its connections to real-life figures and its critical reception. They explored interesting facts about the movie, such as President Clinton’s involvement and the similarities between the film and Aaron Sorkin’s later work, The West Wing. The conversation also touched on other movies set in Washington, D.C., with each participant sharing their favorite films and quotes from Wedding Crashers. The discussion concluded with a brief mention of the film’s rating on Rotten Tomatoes and the group’s enjoyment of certain John Grisham adaptations. Dave” Movie Analysis and Budget Andrew discussed the film “Dave,” highlighting its implausible premise and requiring significant suspension of disbelief. He noted the movie’s memorable scenes, including cameos and budget-balancing antics, while questioning the logic of certain plot points. Andrew also shared interesting facts about U.S. deficits, comparing historical figures and explaining the vastness of a trillion dollars in terms of time. Generational Leadership and Film Insights Andrew reflected on generational leadership, expressing concern about how Gen X and Baby Boomers have handled issues and suggesting younger generations might be better suited for leadership roles. He discussed the film “The American President,” highlighting its themes on environmental and crime legislation, as well as the movie’s portrayal of authenticity and the importance of genuine character in leadership. Andrew also shared his favorite scenes from the film, emphasizing montages that depict personal growth and political challenges. Political Idealism and Realism Andrew discussed the importance of ordinary people making a difference and the balance between idealism and compromise in politics. He reflected on how his views on political issues have evolved with age and experience. Andrew emphasized the significance of words in politics and expressed admiration for Aaron Sorkin’s writing, particularly his portrayal of speech-making in “The Newsroom.” He also shared his fondness for Tim Russert’s moderating style and his impact on political discourse. Generational Language and Political Choices Andrew discussed generational language differences, sharing examples of how different generations use words like “dork,” “awesome,” and “lame.” He emphasized that all personal choices are political and highlighted the importance of teaching children to question authority while staying engaged. Andrew also shared quotes from the movie “The American President” to illustrate the impact of leadership and media scrutiny. Dave Movie Discussion Overview The meeting focused on a detailed discussion about the movie “Dave,” including its plot, characters, and trivia. Andrew and others answered questions about the movie, such as Dave’s job before being recruited, his romance with Sydney, and the political controversy surrounding an environmental bill. They also discussed the movie’s themes, such as political satire and the challenges of leadership. The session concluded with a reminder for listeners to email the hosts with ideas for future discussions and a brief mention of a book and subscription service.

Cathy and Todd look at how groups like Backstreet Boys, *NSYNC, Boyz II Men, and One Direction shaped pop culture and redefined what young men were allowed to sing about. They created space for emotion, love, and vulnerability on stage, but always within a carefully controlled, marketable image. From Lou Pearlman’s factory-style boyband empire to Simon Cowell’s reality TV machine, they explore the rise, the nostalgia, and why boy bands are both cringe and classic at the same time, with Cathy offering deeper reflections from a longtime fan’s perspective. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Dark Side of the Moon Advance Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile AI Summary Todd and Kathy discussed their upcoming podcast episode on boy bands, which will focus on their cultural impact and personal favorites. They promoted their Zen Pop Parenting podcast and related offerings, including a book, newsletter, and virtual community. Todd shared a personal story about his daughter’s experience with sorority rush at Alabama, and they briefly discussed a documentary on boy bands. They also considered whether to bleep an F-bomb in their podcast and reflected on their evolving perceptions of boy bands. Evolution of Boy Bands Todd discussed the evolution of boy bands, tracing their history from the 1950s to the 1980s. He highlighted influential bands like the Beatles, Jackson 5, and New Edition, noting how these groups laid the groundwork for later boy bands. Todd also mentioned Menudo and New Kids on the Block, discussing their formation and popularity. He emphasized that boy bands have often been seen as a vehicle for popularity and commercial success, and he reflected on how his own musical tastes have evolved over time. Boy Band Era Nostalgia Todd and his companion discussed various boy bands, focusing on NKOTB, Boyz II Men, and the Backstreet Boys. They explored the history, members, and impact of these bands, with Todd sharing interesting facts about their origins and the role of Lou Perlman in their formation. They considered creating a podcast dedicated to the Backstreet Boys, given the depth of material. The conversation highlighted the cultural significance of boy bands in the 1990s and their enduring influence. Boy Band Marketing Strategies Todd discussed the contrasting approaches of Lou Perlman and Simon Cowell in creating and marketing boy bands. Perlman focused on blending individual talents into cohesive teams, while Cowell emphasized highlighting individual members to appeal to fans. They explored the cultural impact of boy bands, particularly on young girls, and the evolving dynamics between bands like the Backstreet Boys and NSYNC. Todd also touched on the appeal of boy bands for both fans and performers, and the role of marketing in shaping public perception. Boy Bands and Pop Culture Todd and the other participant discussed various boy bands and their impact on pop culture. They talked about 98 Degrees, One Direction, and the Jonas Brothers, sharing personal experiences and memories. Todd mentioned attending a Backstreet Boys concert and how the band’s music helped her during a difficult time. They also discussed the lyrics and production of popular songs, including “I Want It That Way” by the Backstreet Boys. Todd shared information about Max Martin, a prominent songwriter and producer, and his work with various artists. The conversation concluded with a discussion about Brian Lattrell’s vocal issues and the challenges the Backstreet Boys faced as a result. Boy Bands: Manufacturing and Struggles The discussion focused on the history and dynamics of boy bands, particularly the Backstreet Boys, with Todd sharing insights about their personal struggles and transformations. Todd highlighted how boy bands like the Backstreet Boys were created as manufactured entities to appeal to teenage audiences, while also discussing the challenges faced by band members, including addiction and issues with authenticity. The conversation touched on the cultural impact of boy bands, their role in challenging traditional masculinity norms, and the exploitation faced by child stars. Todd also compared the management and family dynamics of different boy bands, such as the Jackson 5 and the Osmonds, emphasizing the strict discipline and high expectations placed on them by their managers and families. Boy Band Trivia and Tunes Todd and Zane discussed their favorite boy bands and songs, with Todd sharing his top 10 boy bands and Zane providing trivia questions about boy bands. They agreed to end the show with a message about embracing one’s musical preferences without feeling the need to hide them. They closed with the Backstreet Boys song “I Want It That Way.”

Cathy and Todd explore how 1980s glam metal, later dubbed “hairbands” in the ’90s, fused hypersexual, alpha-male posturing with makeup, teased hair, and flamboyant style, creating a theatrical masculinity that rose with MTV and collapsed with the arrival of grunge. From Def Leppard to Poison, these bands borrowed from femininity while reinforcing traditional masculinity, leading to a theatrical version of toughness built for MTV’s visual era. They discuss the rise, peak, and fall of the genre, its shift from rebellion to redundancy, and how it reflected and reshaped cultural ideas about gender, authenticity, and performance. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Dark Side of the Moon Advance Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Ask Us Anything! Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile AI Summary Summary Hair Bands and Gen X Culture Todd and Kathy discussed the evolution of hair bands and their impact on Gen X culture. They clarified the distinction between heavy metal and hair bands, explaining that hair bands emerged in the early 1980s with bands like Quiet Riot and Def Leppard. Todd shared his research findings, including the origins of the term “hair band” and the influence of David Bowie on the genre. They also announced upcoming changes to their virtual community and podcast, including the addition of a Zen Parenting Radio podcast. Evolution of 1980s Hair Metal Todd discussed the evolution of hair metal bands in the 1980s, highlighting key albums and artists like Van Halen, Motley Crue, Def Leppard, Bon Jovi, and Poison. He noted that Bon Jovi transformed their style after the hair metal era, while bands like Def Leppard and Poison maintained popularity. Todd also argued that Guns N’ Roses, with their deeper musical talent, served as a bridge or catalyst in the transition from hair metal to grunge, though he acknowledged the appeal of lighter, fun songs from the era. Rock Music Evolution and Subgenres Todd discussed the evolution of rock music, particularly focusing on the transition from 1980s hair bands to different metal subgenres. He explained how bands like Van Halen and Whitesnake evolved their sound to become more mainstream, while other bands like Metallica and Slayer embraced thrash metal. Todd also shared his own categorization of rock music, distinguishing between heavy metal, hair band glam metal, and hard rock. The conversation touched on how different musical styles reflect societal changes and performative masculinity. Gender-Bending in Music History Todd and his partner discussed the evolution of masculinity in music, particularly focusing on the 1980s hair metal era and its subsequent shift to grunge in the early 1990s. They explored how bands like Van Halen and Motley Crue embraced exaggerated masculinity while incorporating feminine elements like makeup. Todd then highlighted ten notable gender-bending artists throughout history, including Harry Styles, Janelle Monae, Lady Gaga, Marilyn Manson, Annie Lennox, Freddie Mercury, Boy George, Grace Jones, Prince, and David Bowie. They discussed how these artists challenged traditional gender norms through their fashion, presentation, and music. Rock Music Influences and Experiences Todd and Sweetie shared personal stories about their musical influences and experiences, particularly focusing on their introduction to rock music in the 1980s. Todd recalled his love for Van Halen in fifth grade, while Sweetie shared her early exposure to alternative music through her sister and brother-in-law. They discussed how different people and experiences shaped their musical tastes over time, with Todd highlighting significant moments like listening to “Round and Round” in seventh grade and his unsuccessful attempt to attend a Def Leppard concert in high school. The conversation concluded with Todd recounting how he finally saw Def Leppard perform at a concert in Tinley Park with his roommates, despite initially being unable to attend due to his parents’ restrictions. Power Ballad Discussion and Debate Todd and Sweetie discussed their favorite power ballads, with Todd sharing his top 10 list that included songs by bands like Motley Crue, Def Leppard, and Tesla. They debated the merits of various songs and bands, with Todd defending his choices based on personal connections and musical qualities. The conversation concluded with a brief mention of moving on to random facts and “WTF” topics. 1980s Hair Metal Band Analysis Todd shared random facts about 1980s hair metal bands, including tragic deaths and bizarre incidents, before transitioning to a discussion about the cultural impact of hair bands and their paradoxical representation of masculinity. Todd emphasized how these bands, while appearing to subvert gender norms, ultimately reinforced heteronormative ideals. The conversation concluded with Todd reflecting on the importance of avoiding trendy parenting labels, instead opting for “Zen parenting” as an undefined and adaptable approach. Evolution of 80s Hair Metal Todd shared his love for 1980s hair metal bands and discussed how the music scene evolved from the glam rock of the 1980s to the grunge movement of the 1990s. He highlighted the authenticity and raw emotion of grunge bands, contrasting it with the perceived superficiality of 1980s hair bands. Todd also shared his top 10 favorite hair metal songs, emphasizing the enduring appeal and nostalgia of the genre. The discussion concluded with a brief mention of upcoming topics for the next meeting, including performative masculinity and boy bands.

Cathy and Todd discuss 9 to 5 and Working Girl, two movies Gen X women grew up on that shaped how we think about work, power, and what it means to succeed. We watched women push through, keep their heads down, and prove themselves in systems that were never really made for them, and we learned to do the same. We’ve told our daughters they can be anything, but we also passed down burnout, perfectionism, and the pressure to keep it all together. Now girls are asking, “Why are we working so hard for something that doesn’t even work for us?” This episode is about what these films gave us, what they left out, and how we’re rethinking success, feminism, and parenting the next generation. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Dark Side of the Moon Advance Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Ask Us Anything! Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile AI Summary Summary Podcast Planning and Technical Updates Todd and Kathy discussed technical issues related to Wi-Fi and recording devices, noting improvements in connectivity. They also talked about editing a podcast, considering the duration of opening segments and transitions between songs. Todd mentioned his leg pain and a humorous incident involving an ice pack. They prepared to record a new episode of “Zen Pop Parenting,” with Todd introducing the segment. Gen X Feminism in 1980s Films Todd and his co-host discussed the cultural impact of two iconic 1980s films, “9 to 5” and “Working Girl,” exploring how they reflected and shaped Gen X feminism. They highlighted the films’ portrayal of workplace inequality, the pressure to “have it all,” and the contrast between systemic change and individual ambition. Todd shared personal anecdotes about watching these movies with his daughters and reflecting on their messages in the context of his own life and the 2016 election. The discussion also touched on the broader cultural landscape of the 1980s, including music and fashion, and how these elements contributed to the era’s feminist energy. 1991 Hearing’s Impact on Culture Todd discussed the Anita Hill-Clarence Thomas Supreme Court nomination hearing in 1991, highlighting its impact on workplace harassment awareness and the “Year of the Woman” election in 1992. He noted that while Clarence Thomas was ultimately confirmed, the hearing sparked national conversations about gender, race, and power in the workplace, with parallels to more recent events involving Christine Blasey Ford and Brett Kavanaugh. Todd also mentioned how the cultural shift influenced TV and film, citing shows like “Murphy Brown” and movies like “9 to 5” and “Thelma & Louise” as examples of changing portrayals of women in the workplace. Women’s Strength in Film Todd discussed the themes of strength and resilience in women, using examples from movies like Steel Magnolias and Working Girl. He shared interesting facts about the filming of Working Girl, including Melanie Griffith’s addiction issues and Mike Nichols’ directorial approach. Todd also highlighted Carly Simon’s achievements and the success of 9 to 5, noting its cultural impact and Dolly Parton’s role in its creation. Working Girl” Character Analysis Todd discussed the film “Working Girl,” focusing on Melanie Griffith’s transformation from a sex symbol to a leading actress and the movie’s plot twists. He highlighted the unexpected proposal scene and criticized the character development, particularly the rapid progression from an affair to a marriage proposal. Todd also compared “Working Girl” to other films with similar plot elements, such as “The Deer Hunter” and “9 to 5,” and expressed a desire to watch it as a double feature with “9 to 5.” Fantasies of Workplace Revenge Todd discussed the movie “9 to 5” and its plot, which revolves around three female office workers who fantasize about killing their boss. He shared details about the characters’ fantasies, including Judy’s desire to hunt down her boss, Dora Lee’s plan to give him a taste of his own medicine, and Violet’s Snow White-inspired plot to poison his coffee. Todd expressed his fondness for the movie despite its slow pace and over-the-top plot, noting that it served as a fantasy for women facing workplace oppression. He also briefly mentioned Melanie Griffith’s marital history and her daughter, Dakota Johnson, who followed in her mother’s footsteps in the entertainment industry. 1980s Feminism in Film Todd discussed the themes of 1980s and 1990s movies, particularly focusing on “Working Girl” and “9 to 5,” which often celebrated individual women’s success within a system that harms women, rather than addressing systemic inequality. He explained how these films portrayed personal victories within unchanged systems, contributing to a mentality that there can only be one woman at the top. Todd also shared his favorite scenes from both movies, highlighting humorous and dramatic moments, and discussed the concept of “neoliberal feminism” in the context of these films. Generational Feminism and Communication Dynamics Todd discussed the plot of a movie involving a character named Catherine who stole an idea from someone else and later shared it at a wedding. He also explained the different waves of feminism, particularly focusing on Generation X’s experience in the 1980s, which was about balancing career and family while navigating office politics and sexual harassment. Todd highlighted how women have historically learned to speak in a way that men can understand, a concept illustrated by a quote from Meryl Streep, while noting that men often struggle to communicate effectively with women. Cultural Pressures on Women in Work Todd discussed the cultural pressure on women to be smaller and less assertive in the workplace, tracing this back to the 1980s and examining its impact on personal and professional identity. He highlighted how feminism was often framed as a personal strategy rather than a collective movement, using examples from films like “Working Girl” and “9 to 5” to illustrate this point. Todd also connected this concept to multi-level marketing schemes, noting that 99% of participants either lose money or make nothing, and emphasized the importance of understanding these schemes as a form of exploitation rather than legitimate business opportunities. MLM Exploitation and Gender Equality Todd discussed the targeting of women by multi-level marketing (MLM) schemes, highlighting how they exploit women with limited options, such as stay-at-home mothers, by promising independence and financial freedom that is rarely achieved. Todd emphasized the importance of teaching girls about systemic inequalities and preparing them to navigate these challenges, while also encouraging sons to understand consent and respect for women. The conversation also touched on the double standards faced by women, including the expectation to be both powerful and palatable, and the need for a new model of masculinity that supports gender equality. Empowering Women’s Ambition Todd discussed the importance of ambition for women, referencing Reese Witherspoon’s 2015 speech at the Glamour Women of the Year Awards. He highlighted how ambition is often misunderstood and undervalued for women, contrasting it with the portrayal in movies like “9 to 5” and “Working Girl.” Todd emphasized that ambition should be seen as a positive force, not just for personal success but for creating a better world, and shared his own evolving understanding of ambition as he has aged. He encouraged parents to teach their daughters that ambition is not selfish but can be generous and collaborative, citing examples of women helping each other, like the WNBA team he mentioned. Analyzing Feminism in 80s Films The group discussed the movies “Working Girl” and “9 to 5,” analyzing themes of feminism, racial diversity, and body representation. They shared favorite quotes from the films, including memorable lines from Dolly Parton and Harrison Ford. The participants played a music game related to the movies and discussed movie trivia. They concluded the podcast by playing the instrumental theme from “Working Girl” as their closing music.

Our daughters Jacey, Camryn, and Skylar join us as we explore the themes behind The Hunger Games books and movies and what they say about power, survival, and the cost of being human in an inhumane system. We talk about the Capitol’s need for control, how hope threatens oppression, and what happens when kids are forced to grow up too soon. Plus, we connect it all to parenting—what it means to show up and why sibling bonds matter when systems fail. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Dark Side of the Moon Advance Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Ask Us Anything! Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile

Cathy and Todd discuss Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and The Big Lebowski, two films that ask the same question in totally different ways: what if we just stopped playing the game? They set the scene with the cultural vibes of the ’80s and ’90s including achievement culture, Reaganomics, slacker disillusionment and reflect on how Ferris and The Dude each push back against pressure and performance. From parade dancing and White Russians to teen burnout and existential shrugs, the share personal stories, emotional insight, and parenting takeaways, exploring why sometimes doing “nothing” is exactly what we need. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Dark Side of the Moon Advance Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Ask Us Anything! Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile AI Summary Todd and Kathy introduce episode 826 of Zen Pop Parenting, which is their 9th episode in this series. They discuss the theme of “doing nothing” as portrayed in the movies Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and The Big Lebowski. The hosts debate which of these two films they would choose if stranded on a desert island, with Todd preferring Ferris Bueller for its personal connections and Kathy leaning towards The Big Lebowski. They warn listeners that the episode will contain explicit language due to clips from The Big Lebowski.Ferris Bueller’s Day Off AnalysisTodd and his co-host discuss the movie “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off,” offering their perspectives on the characters and themes. They argue that the film is primarily about Cameron’s journey, with Jeannie’s character development also being significant, while Ferris remains unchanged. The hosts set the scene for the movie, describing it as a 1986 John Hughes film set in suburban Chicago, focusing on Ferris skipping school with his friends for a day of adventure in the city. They also discuss the cultural context of the 1980s, including Reaganomics and achievement culture, and compare the film’s box office performance to other popular movies of that year.The Big Lebowski: Cult Classic AnalysisThe discussion focuses on the movie “The Big Lebowski” (1998), starring Jeff Bridges as “the Dude.” Todd explains that the film, set in early 1990s Los Angeles, follows an unemployed bowler who gets involved in a crime plot after someone ruins his rug. The movie’s absurdist humor reflects the post-Cold War era’s cultural drift and confusion. Todd notes that the film’s structure is based on Raymond Chandler’s detective stories, and despite its cult status, it was not a box office success upon release. The main character is described as a 1960s counterculture figure who remains unchanged in the 1990s.Reflecting on Classic FilmsTodd discusses his memories of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and The Big Lebowski. He recalls watching Ferris Bueller frequently after its release, noting its quotable lines and impact on his generation. Todd mentions performing a palm routine to a song from the movie and recognizes Sig Sig Sputnik’s music from the soundtrack. Regarding The Big Lebowski, Todd admits he came to appreciate it much later, only watching it for the first time about 20 years ago.Ferris Bueller’s Day Off DiscussionTodd and his conversation partner discuss their experiences with playing hooky and compare them to the movie “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.” They explore the feasibility of replicating Ferris’s day off in real life, considering the time it takes to drive from the suburbs to Chicago. The conversation then shifts to discussing White Russians and Todd’s habit of quoting a specific line from the movie when his daughters are sick. They reflect on the differences between how mothers and fathers typically care for sick children, acknowledging that these tendencies are learned behaviors rather than biological traits.Ferris Bueller Trivia HighlightsTodd shares various random facts about the movies “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” and “The Big Lebowski.” He mentions that John Hughes wrote “Ferris Bueller” in under a week, and that Alan Ruck, who played Cameron, was 29 years old during filming. Todd also notes that Ben Stein’s famous lecture scene was improvised, and that a scene where Ferris and his friends visit a strip club was cut from the final film. Additionally, he points out that Charlie Sheen stayed awake for 48 hours to prepare for his uncredited role in the movie.Movie Trivia and Behind-the-Scenes InsightsThe discussion covers various aspects of the movies Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and The Big Lebowski. Todd shares several facts about both films, including the frequency of the word “dude” in Lebowski and details about Cameron’s house in Ferris Bueller. They also discuss Sarah Jessica Parker’s reluctance to narrate in Sex and the City due to its similarity to Ferris Bueller. The conversation touches on the role of Sam Elliott’s character in Lebowski and concludes with a disturbing revelation about Jeffrey Jones, who played Ed Rooney in Ferris Bueller.Movie Insights: Ferris and LebowskiThe discussion focuses on two movies: “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” and “The Big Lebowski.” Todd comments on the obliviousness of parents in 1980s films, particularly in “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.” The conversation then shifts to “The Big Lebowski,” with Todd praising John Goodman’s acting and discussing favorite scenes and quotes from the movie. Todd expresses admiration for Jeff Bridges’ performance as “the Dude” and compares a particular scene to Fred Armisen’s impression of Nick Fehn on Saturday Night Live.Analyzing Iconic Movie ScenesThe group discusses favorite scenes from movies, focusing on “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” and “The Big Lebowski.” They analyze the Art Museum scene in Ferris Bueller, noting its melancholy tone and character development. For The Big Lebowski, they highlight the eulogy scene, appreciating its humor and John Goodman’s performance. The conversation touches on the deeper meanings of these scenes and the characters’ relationships.Movie Character Analysis Deep DiveThe discussion focuses on the deeper meanings and character analyses of two movies: “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” and “The Big Lebowski.” For Ferris Bueller, they explore how the protagonist’s actions represent a deliberate reclaiming of time and a rejection of societal pressures, emphasizing the importance of living in the moment. They also delve into Cameron’s character development and his confrontation with his father issues. Regarding The Big Lebowski, they discuss the main character’s philosophy of detachment and acceptance of life’s absurdities, contrasting it with the nihilists in the film. The conversation concludes by briefly mentioning parental guidance themes in the movies.Teen Rebellion in John Hughes FilmsThe group discusses John Hughes’ films, particularly “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” and “The Breakfast Club,” noting similarities between characters and Hughes’ repetitive themes. They explore the idea that teenage rebellion in these films is often about finding oneself rather than breaking rules. The conversation then shifts to a discussion of oblivious parents in Gen X movies, with examples from various films including “Home Alone” and “Pretty in Pink.” They conclude by examining the portrayal of Daniel LaRusso’s mother in “The Karate Kid,” debating whether she was aware of what was happening in her son’s life.Big Lebowski and Ferris Bueller ThemesTodd discusses various aspects of the films “The Big Lebowski” and “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off,” focusing on character analysis and life lessons. He highlights Walter’s projection issues, the Dude’s contrasting laid-back attitude, and Donnie’s role as the overlooked character in “The Big Lebowski.” Todd also explores themes of masculinity in crisis, the philosophy of “abiding,” and the importance of friendship and loyalty in both movies. He concludes by comparing the Dude’s detachment with humility to the Nihilists’ angry detachment, emphasizing the difference between believing in nothing while still caring versus needing to win.Ferris and Lebowski Movie QuotesTodd leads a discussion about favorite quotes from “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” and “The Big Lebowski.” They share and analyze several memorable lines from both movies, discussing their context and impact. The conversation then shifts to categorizing the films as either “cringey” or “classic,” with both being deemed classics in their own right. They play a music game, trying to find songs that capture the essence of both movies. The session concludes with a rapid-fire trivia round about both films, testing their knowledge of characters, plot points, and memorable scenes.

Cathy and Todd discuss Stranger Things Season 1 through a cultural, emotional, and psychological lens. They explore how the show’s 80s nostalgia, supernatural mystery, and strong character dynamics reflect deeper themes of trauma, shadow work, friendship, and resilience. Set against the backdrop of 2016 (Cubs World Series Win, presidential election, and personal turning points), they unpack why the Upside Down isn’t just a scary place but a metaphor for the parts of ourselves we avoid, and how love, connection, and curiosity help us survive what feels unknowable. Some Ways to Support Us Sign up for Cathy’s Substack Order Restoring our Girls Join Team Zen Dark Side of the Moon Advance Links shared in this episode: For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com. This week’s sponsor(s): Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration. David Serrano- Certified Financial Planner- 815-370-3780 MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys Other Ways to Support Us Ask Us Anything! Follow us on social media Instagram YouTube Facebook Buy and leave a review for Cathy’s Book Zen Parenting: Caring for Ourselves and Our Children in an Unpredictable World Find everything ZPR on our Resources Page Guys- Complete a MenLiving Connect profile AI Summary Meeting summary for ZPR Podcast Recording (07/02/2025) Quick recapTodd and his co-host discussed their love for the TV show Stranger Things, exploring its themes, characters, and psychological aspects. They delved into the show’s portrayal of trauma, friendship, and personal growth, while also sharing their favorite moments and music from the series. The discussion touched on the importance of understanding and supporting children’s interests, as well as the anticipation for the upcoming fifth season of Stranger Things.SummaryStranger Things and D&D ConnectionsTodd discussed his love for Dungeons & Dragons, comparing it to the show Stranger Things, which he believes reflects his childhood. He mentioned that Stranger Things season one was nominated for 18 Emmys and won 5, and he shared interesting facts about the show’s creation and influences, including its references to various 80s movies and music. Todd also highlighted the show’s themes of friendship, family, and teamwork, and mentioned that the actors had played Dungeons & Dragons before filming began.Stranger Things Season 1 ReviewTodd and his co-host discussed their love for the first season of Stranger Things, highlighting the character of Joyce Byers and her intensity, as well as the show’s revival of 1980s and 1990s actors like Winona Ryder and Matthew Modine. They also talked about Steve Harrington’s character development and the controversial “Papa” storyline. The hosts shared their favorite scenes from the season, including the dramatic moment when Mike is willing to jump off a cliff for his friend, and the emotional reunion of the kids with Will in the hospital. They concluded by discussing the deeper themes of the show, including trauma and grief, and how it relates to their podcast’s title.Shadow Self in Stranger ThingsTodd discussed the psychological themes in Stranger Things, focusing on the upside down as a representation of the shadow self and unconscious trauma. He explained how characters like Will, Eleven, and Hopper deal with their own traumas and how facing these dark aspects can lead to personal growth. Todd also highlighted the importance of integrating the shadow self and the dangers of ignoring or repressing it. He concluded by drawing parallels to real-world issues, such as the ethical considerations in scientific experimentation, particularly in the context of AI development.ChatGPT and Stranger Things InsightsTodd discussed his interactions with ChatGPT, expressing frustration with its lack of understanding and personality, despite uploading personal information to improve its responses. He explored themes from Stranger Things, particularly focusing on the character of Eleven as a modern-day chosen one and the importance of parental trust and openness. Todd emphasized the show’s lessons for parents, including believing their children’s experiences and staying curious, while highlighting the intuitive and creative nature of children. He also humorously criticized the cluelessness of the Wheeler family in the show, drawing parallels to his own experiences.Children’s Interests and ‘Stranger ThingsTodd discussed the importance of understanding and supporting children’s interests, emphasizing that being different is a superpower and that connection heals trauma. He highlighted the significance of body language as a form of communication, especially in the show “Stranger Things.” Todd also shared his favorite quotes from the show, including Dustin’s curious conversation with his teacher, and mentioned the release schedule for the upcoming fifth season, which will be released in three parts on significant dates.Stranger Things Trivia and MusicTodd and his friend engaged in a discussion about the TV show Stranger Things, sharing their favorite music and trivia about the series. They played a music game where Todd chose “Heathens” by 21 Pilots, which was combined with Stranger Things theme music in a concert. Todd also administered a quiz to his friend about various Stranger Things facts, which they answered successfully. They encouraged others to watch or rewatch the series in preparation for the upcoming Season 5.