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40 Plus: Gay Men. Gay Talk.

Author: Rick Clemons

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Welcome to the only podcast exploring the messiness, awesomeness, of masculinity of being a gay man over 40. Each episode is about sparking idea, addressing challenges, and diving deep into what it looks like to be a vulnerable gay guy. We talk about the stuff us gay guys have a hard time talking about, man-to-man: masculinity, sex, careers, our bodies, parenting, sexuality, failures, success, and aging, relationships, coming out - nothing is off limits.

40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk is the revamped version of 40 Plus: Real Men. Real Talk podcast and is a short format podcast that's easy to digest. We take deep dives - one topic at a time - digging up the truth of what it’s like to be a gay man, instead of some contrived expectation of masculinity. We’re reclaiming manhood and our masculinity by facing our fears, making bold moves, and living life without apologies. Join us, but you've got to drop your BS, forget posturing, and be ready to explore the comical dysfunctions of our lives as gay men 40+ years of age!
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Many gay men over 40 quietly panic when sex stops working the way it used to. Erections feel unpredictable. Anxiety creeps in. Porn, media, and aging myths make it worse. Men’s coach Shay Doran brings a grounded, no nonsense perspective to performance anxiety, erectile dysfunction, stress, medication side effects, and the emotional pressure gay men carry into the bedroom. This conversation reframes sexual performance as a whole life issue, not a broken body problem. When stress, self worth, and identity are addressed, desire and connection often follow. The episode challenges shame based thinking and replaces it with curiosity, honesty, and a better understanding of sex after 40. Key Takeaways from the Podcast: Why performance anxiety is often a stress response, not a sexual failureHow porn and cultural expectations distort confidence for gay men over 40What actually helps rebuild intimacy, trust, and desire without shame About Shay Shay Doran is a men’s coach, specializing in helping men fix erection problems & performance anxiety. After experiencing this himself, Shay has now helped men around the world overcome erection problems & feel normal again. Connect With Shay Website YouTube Hey Guys, Don't Forget! Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community
In this powerful midlife conversation, Ralph Brewer, author of Rebuild: The Complete Guide to Starting Over as a Man,  unpacks the universal relationship challenges men face, gay or straight. From anxious attachment and dead bedrooms to boundaries, neurodivergence, and long-term monogamy, this episode reveals how male relationship patterns cross orientation lines. Ralph shares his journey from heterosexual marriage and divorce to becoming a leading voice in men’s relationship coaching, while Rick connects these insights directly to gay men navigating midlife transitions. This episode is a must-listen for men ready to rebuild relationships with clarity, self-awareness, and support. Key take aways from this episode Attachment styles, especially anxious attachment, and how it impacts gay and straight men in nearly identical ways.Boundaries aren’t about control; they’re about self-respect and emotional safety.Community and honest self-reflection are essential tools for rebuilding relationships after loss, divorce, or identity shifts. About Ralph Ralph Brewer is the author of REBUILD – The Complete Guide to Starting Over as a Man, The Dead Bedroom Fix, Divorce Panic, Red Flags, and Real Talk: No Bullsh*t Life Advice for Young Men. His work has been read and listened to by hundreds of thousands of men around the world. Through his writing, podcast, and global men’s community, Ralph has become one of the most trusted voices helping men navigate the modern landscape of relationships, masculinity, and personal transformation. Ralph’s journey started the hard way. After going through a painful divorce and personal collapse more than a decade ago, he found himself questioning everything — his role as a man, a father, and a partner. What began as his own process of rebuilding evolved into an international movement. Today, his message reaches hundreds of thousands of men each week through his books, videos, and the growing Help For Men organization. Connect With Ralph Website Instagram Facebook Hey Guys, Don't Forget! Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community
In this bold and eye-opening episode, I sit down with male boudoir photographer Trey Fox to explore how intimate portraiture helps men reclaim confidence, reconnect with their bodies, and see themselves through a more empowered lens. Trey shares the artistry and psychology behind photographing men—from building trust and consent to creating a safe, shame-free environment for vulnerability and expression. During this episode we explore the misconceptions surrounding erotic photography, the emotional transformations clients experience, and the challenges of navigating this profession while in a relationship. Whether you’re curious about male boudoir, body positivity, or redefining masculinity, this episode offers a candid and inspiring look inside Trey's world. Key take aways from this episode Explore how photography can be healing. Trey’s male boudoir sessions help men confront insecurities, reclaim self-worth, and see themselves with fresh eyes.Learn why trust is everything. Building safety, clarity, and consent is essential for intimate portraiture, and it transforms the entire experience.Discover why masculinity is evolving, and how more men are seeking spaces to express vulnerability, sensuality, and authenticity without judgment. About Trey Trey Fox is a full-time professional photographer specializing in intimate, transformative portraits for men. Over the past two decades, his distinctive approach has helped clients embrace their sensuality and sexuality, seeing themselves not just through their own eyes, but as others truly see them. The experience goes far beyond creating beautiful photographs. Many clients walk away with a renewed sense of confidence and a deeper connection to themselves - one that lingers long after the camera is put away. Because of his deep respect for discretion and privacy, Trey has been entrusted by a wide range of men- from corporate executives and public figures to everyday guys - to create striking, one-of-a-kind portraits in extraordinary locations across the country and abroad. Connect With Trey Website Instagram Hey Guys, Don't Forget! Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community
In this episode, author Peter Leahy shares his powerful late-life coming out story towards true authenticity. In this episode we explore what it means to shed old personas, embrace your identity at any age, and rewrite the stories you once hid behind. From navigating professional masks to discovering emotional freedom through writing, Peter’s memoir Glowing Up Gay has resonated with thousands for its raw honesty and relatable truth. Whether you’re coming out later in life or reclaiming parts of yourself you’ve long avoided, this episode is a bold reminder that it’s never too late to become who you really are. Key take aways from this episode Authenticity isn’t immediate—it’s practiced. Coming out later in life often means unlearning years of hiding and slowly stepping into wholeness.Labels can connect or confine. Understanding LGBTQ+ language helps people find belonging while honoring their own identity.Your story matters. Writing, sharing, or even speaking your truth can create healing and inspire others on their own journey. About Peter A self-proclaimed “ideas guy,” Peter worked in marketing for over twenty-five years. For many years, he saw himself as a coward – too scared to admit that he was gay and embrace who hewas. Throughout his 20’s and 30’s, his active life was masked with what he believed was “normalcy,” but underneath it he was tormented by sadness, emptiness and most importantly, self-loathing, Finally, he summoned the courage to walk away and eventually become a proud (and fabulous) gay man. Now happily married to his husband for over five years, he lives in California with our Chihuahua Zoey, the queen of our household. Connect With Peter Website Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Don't Forget! Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community
In this powerful episode, David Osterman shares his journey from late-life self-discovery to addiction recovery that is nothing short of extraordinary. David opens up about coming out in his 40s, surviving meth addiction, rebuilding after a life-threatening fall, and finding purpose as a coach for gay men seeking confidence, clarity, and truth. Together, we dive into identity, resilience, executive-level marketing strategies, and the courage required to rebuild your life from the inside out. If you’re navigating reinvention, queer identity, or recovery, this episode hits deep. 3 Key Takeaways From This Episode: Why your truth always wins, even when it is painfulHow recovery transforms you and creates space for rebirth and reinvention.Discover how confidence is a strategy that manygay men are missing to thrive  About David David Osterman is a proud father of three and a survivor of life’s toughest challenges. After struggling with addiction and surviving a near-fatal fall from a third story building during his meth use, David spent four months in the hospital recovering from broken feet and a back injury, learning to walk again. Now one year sober and thriving, he came out at the age of 42 and has embraced his journey of self-discovery and transformation. As an aspiring gay life coach and certified NLP practitioner, David looks help men over 45 navigate late-in-life awakenings, overcome personal obstacles, and embrace their authentic selves. He has been featured on podcasts sharing his story of resilience, courage, and transformation, proving it’s never too late to rebuild and thrive. Connect With David Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
Loneliness is one of the most unspoken struggles among gay men, especially as we age, get sober, or outgrow old social circles. In this powerful conversation, licensed therapist Chris Tompkins unpacks why so many gay men feel disconnected even when surrounded by people, apps, and nightlife. This episode explores how sobriety, shame, dating apps, and societal expectations quietly fuel isolation, and what it actually takes to build authentic connection. From the “wounded healer” journey to embracing singleness, self-acceptance, and values-based living, this episode invites gay men to stop chasing validation and start creating lives rooted in truth, alignment, and meaningful connection. Three Key Takeaways Loneliness isn’t a personal failure, it’s often a byproduct of disconnection from self.Sobriety can reveal who and what is genuinely aligned in your life.Real connection begins when your values, actions, and identity are congruent. About Christopher Chris Tompkins is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who specializes in working with adult gay men. He is also the author of the award-winning book Raising LGBTQ Allies: A Parent’s Guide to Changing the Messages from the Playground. In addition to being a therapist, Chris is a writer and public speaker. His work has been featured on TEDx, NBC, HuffPost, Psychology Today, The Advocate, and more. Connect With Christopher Website Instagram LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
In this intriguing episode, Dr. Mark Broomfield, author of Black Queer Dance, Gay Men and the Politics of Passing for Almost Straight,  explores the complex intersections of race, queerness, masculinity, and identity. It's a deep dive into the realities queer men of color face in dance, performance spaces, academia, and everyday life, including the pressure to “pass,” racial surveillance, and the politics of being “almost straight.” Mark and Rick share deeply personal stories that reveal how culture shapes expression, safety, and authenticity. This conversation shines a critical light on representation, lived experience, and what it truly means to embody queer identity in a racialized world. Key take aways from this episode Learn the cultural pressures Black queer men face around masculinity, performance, and the expectation to “pass” in different social environments.Discover how identity is strategically navigated, sometimes for safety and sometimes for self-preservation, especially for queer men of color.Learn why representation in dance and performance matters, and how history, stereotypes, and lived experience shape the queer Black artistic journey. About Mark Mark Broomfield, Associate Professor of English, Founder and Director of Performance as Social Change at SUNY Geneseo, holds a PhD in Critical Dance Studies from the University of California, Riverside, and an MFA from the University of Michigan, is a London-born award-winning scholar, artist, and performer of Jamaican heritage. His book Black Queer Dance: Gay Men and the Politics of Passing for Almost Straight, is a groundbreaking exploration of black masculinity and sexual passing in American contemporary dance that examines core themes about the freedom of movement, freedom of expression, and sexual freedom and what they reveal about how we all move through the world. Watch for Broomfield’s soon to be released Danced Out documentary. Connect With Mark Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
In this powerful episode, LGBTQ+ historian and collector Adrian Cardwell shares how his project, Badge of Pride, is preserving 30 years of queer history to ensure our stories are never forgotten. From the AIDS crisis to modern-day equality movements, Adrian’s journey reminds us that visibility, unity, and storytelling are the backbone of our community’s strength. We explore what it means to protect queer archives, how personal stories shape collective progress, and why showing up—especially in politically divisive times—matters more than ever. Our stories aren’t just history—they’re our legacy, our power, and our connection to each other. 3 Key Takeaways From This Episode: How storytelling and archiving protect LGBTQ+ legacy and visibility. The role of Badge of Pride in connecting and empowering queer communities. Why unity and solidarity are vital to progress in challenging political times. About Adrian Adrian Cardwell is the founder and executive director of Badge Of Pride, an organization dedicated to activating LGBTQ+ history through artifacts and storytelling. For more than 30 years, Adrian has been building a nationally significant collection of Queer history—over 10,000 artifacts—through relationships with LGBTQ+ activists and communities around the world. After a more than 25-year career in corporate leadership, directing national sales and marketing for a global telecommunications firm and serving on international committees to expand broadband access in underserved and conflict-affected regions, Adrian pivoted in 2022 to launch Badge Of Pride. His goal: to bring this collection out of the shadows and into public spaces as a tool for truth-telling, resistance, and connection. He is the curator of Badge Of Pride: From Silence…To Celebration!, the largest artifact-centered exhibition of LGBTQ+ history ever presented in Texas, and a bold counterpoint to today’s climate of censorship and cultural erasure. Connect With Adrian Website Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
In this soulful and unfiltered conversation, singer-songwriter Mike Maimone—a former accountant turned queer creative force—shares how love, loss, and midlife reinvention shaped his music and life. From finding love across an age gap with late partner Howard Bragman, to channeling grief into his upcoming album and book, Guess What, I Love You (out February), Mike opens up about rediscovering purpose after heartbreak. Together, Rick and Mike dive into healing, queer resilience, and what it means to live unapologetically authentic—no fears, no excuses, no apologies. Three Key Takeaways Reinvention knows no age limit: Mike’s switch from accounting to full-time musician proves it’s never too late to follow your authentic rhythm. Love isn’t defined by age—it’s anchored in shared values and authenticity; Mike and Howard’s story shows how connection outlasts external assumptions. Grief can become creative fuel: Mike transformed loss into art, launching an album and book that honor memory by turning pain into performance.  About Mike Originally a business school graduate and accountant, Mike Maimone made his way into full-time music through Chicago’s blues scene, drawing comparisons to legends like Randy Newman and Leon Russell. He has since performed more than 100 shows annually, appearing at festivals such as Lollapalooza, Riot Fest, and Summer Camp, while sharing stages with Blues Traveler, Plain White T’s, and Company of Thieves. His music has been placed on TV soundtracks and even featured at Wrigley Field. In 2023, Maimone released Borrowed Tunes, Vol. 2, followed by sold-out shows in Los Angeles, New York, and Chicago, with proceeds benefiting The Trevor Project. A live album, Songs for You, Alive in Chicago, followed in early 2024. His forthcoming album Guess What? I Love You, available for pre-order in limited-edition vinyl and CD formats, will include handwritten lyrics, liner notes, and photos, further underscoring the deeply personal nature of the project. Connect With Mike Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
What happens when fatherhood meets unapologetic pride? David Morgenstern, founder of GADDIES, is redefining what it means to be a gay dad through bold branding, community, and connection. From the evolution of GADDIES as a lifestyle brand for gay fathers to navigating visibility, partnerships, and authenticity, this episode explores how storytelling and representation can reshape culture. Discover how GADDIES built an inclusive space for dads who started their families in different ways—and why visibility still matters for LGBTQ+ parents everywhere. 3 Takeaways: How GADDIES empowers gay dads to show up boldly in family and culture.The business strategy behind creating authentic LGBTQ+ brands.Why representation and intergenerational connection fuel real progress.   About David Nobody gets the importance of community quite like the gays. From feeling like outsiders to finding people who love us without reservation, we know both the pain of being tribeless and the joy of true belonging. When David and his my husband became dads, he craved more ways to connect with others on this wild, beautiful ride called fatherhood. He was looking for celebration. A space where families like his could feel seen, supported, and full of pride. That’s why he started Gaddies: to build something bold and joyful for us. The first brand created specifically for gay dads, Gaddies exists to elevate our stories, spark connection, and create community. Whether you’ve been a dad for decades or you’re taking baby steps towards first time fatherhood, Gaddies wants you to to feel seen and inspired to parent with pride. Connect With David Website Instagram Facebook Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
What does it take to come out, really come out, when you’ve spent a lifetime hiding behind shame, success, and survival? In this episode of 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk, Rick Clemons sits down with author Dan Bolin, whose memoir The Courage to Be Courageous tells the story of coming out at 70, healing religious trauma, and learning to love himself as a beautiful gay man. It’s raw. It’s real. And it’s a reminder that no matter your age, it’s never too late to live free and authentic. 3 Key Takeaways From This Episode: It’s never too late to live your truth. Whether you’re 25 or 75, self-acceptance starts the moment you stop apologizing for who you are. Shame doesn’t define you—unless you let it. Healing begins when you stop living by other people’s rules and start writing your own. Your story can save lives. Sharing your truth helps others break their silence and step into courage. About Dan Dan Bolen spent 50 years building a national reputation in executive recruiting—founding the #1 executive search firm in the country—while secretly battling the weight of addiction, faith, and identity. Raised in a strict Jehovah’s Witness household and twice married, Dan didn’t come out as gay until his seventies, after retirement stripped away his old hiding places. Today, he shares his hard-won story of loss, liberation, and finally finding peace by living authentically and in his book entitled The Courage To Be Courageous: A memoir of struggle, success, and truth. Connect With Dan Website Instagram Facebook Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
In this raw and heartfelt episode, New York designer, storyteller and former drag performer, John Patrick (JP) for a powerful conversation about growing older, wiser, and freer as gay men. Together, JP and Rick unpack decades of experience — from coming out in different eras to surviving the AIDS crisis, finding confidence through drag and other careers, to redefining what self-acceptance really looks like after 40. It’s not nostalgia. It’s truth-telling — about how far we’ve come, what still needs to change, and the beauty of learning to love yourself without apology. 3 Key Takeaways From This Episode: Self-acceptance is a practice, not a destination. You grow into it, daily. Kindness over judgment. Age brings perspective — and the grace to stop proving yourself. Perfection is overrated. Excellence, authenticity, and joy are the new goals About JP John Patrick - JP - is passionate about transforming spaces and lives through interior design. His philosophy is simple yet powerful: “Changing Overwhelmed into Overjoyed.” As the creative force behind John Patrick Designs, he combines color, texture, lighting, and thoughtful furniture placement to craft environments that elevate how people live and work. From luxury residences to commercial spaces, John’s approach blends sophistication with comfort, ensuring every design feels both beautiful and deeply personal. A South Carolina native now based in New York City, John has been reimagining spaces since childhood—mentally rearranging every room he entered long before doing so professionally. Today, his portfolio spans projects from $500,000 to $10 million, each handled with the same dedication, creativity, and attention to detail. John’s work extends throughout the New York Metro and Tri-State area, including Fairfield, Westchester, Rockland, Bergen, and Hudson counties, as well as national and international relocations. Whether designing a Manhattan penthouse, a suburban family home, or a commercial property, he brings vision, expertise, and heart to every project. John Patrick Designs isn’t just about creating stunning interiors—it’s about designing joy, comfort, and possibility. Connect With JP Website Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make
In this powerful episode, Alabama native and political candidate Dakarai Larriett talks about what it really means to lead with authenticity in one of the toughest states to do it. From surviving a false arrest to running openly as a gay Black man, Dakarai’s story is a masterclass in courage, empathy, and conviction. In this episode we unpack the realities of running for office, reforming broken systems, and staying true to yourself when the odds are stacked high. What you will learn Authenticity wins hearts — how Dakarai’s story of resilience and faith helps voters connect beyond politics. Systemic change requires courage — the truth about law enforcement reform, qualified immunity, and real accountability. Leadership through empathy — why compassion and conviction matter more than party lines in shaping Alabama’s future. About Dakarai Dakarai Larriett is a proud Alabama native, entrepreneur, and community leader now running for public office to serve the people of his home state. The son of a U.S. Army veteran and a public-school teacher, Dakarai grew up with a deep respect for service, education, and hard work—values that continue to guide his life and leadership. An honors graduate of the University of Alabama (Magna Cum Laude) and MBA holder from NYU, Dakarai built a successful corporate career with L’Oréal and Whirlpool before launching his own nationally recognized pet-care company. His entrepreneurial journey—from garage startup to thriving business—reflects his belief that opportunity grows when we invest in people and communities. Since returning to Birmingham in 2021, Dakarai has become known for his servant leadership and civic engagement, volunteering with United Way, Meals on Wheels, and the Humane Society. He also leads the board representing 60 families and small businesses at Mercantile on Morris, a mixed-use development in downtown Birmingham. Grounded in faith and fueled by purpose, Dakarai is running for office to bring accountable leadership, economic opportunity, and community pride back to Alabama. When he’s not serving or campaigning, you’ll find him at the shooting range on Saturdays or at First United Methodist on Sundays—always proud to call Alabama home. Connect With Dakarai Website Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community -
In this open and unapologetic conversation, Jeff Abraham, CEO of Promescent, talks about sexual wellness, communication, and confidence at any age. From lube myths to aging libidos, solo masturbation to mutual pleasure, we explore how science, honesty, and a sense of humor can transform your sex life. It’s a conversation that every man (and his partner) should hear—because better sex starts with better communication. Here's what you'll... Discover How To Talk Before You Touch: How open, honest conversations build deeper intimacy. Learn How Science Meets Pleasure: Why sexual wellness is as much about health as it is about fun. Explore Why Confidence Is Sexy: How age, communication, and the right tools can reignite passion. About Jeff Jeff Abraham leads Promescent with a bold vision to make sexual wellness more accessible, effective, and inclusive. After a successful career in tech recruiting, Jeff was introduced to a revolutionary treatment for premature ejaculation (PE) by his close friend, urologist Dr. Ronald Gilbert. Inspired by its potential to change lives, Jeff invested in the product and became the majority owner - launching what would become Promescent’s flagship Delay Spray. Following Dr. Gilbert’s unfortunate passing in 2013, Jeff relocated the company to Las Vegas and took over as CEO. Under his leadership, Promescent evolved from a company focused on a single groundbreaking solution into a full-spectrum sexual wellness brand. Today, the product line includes doctor-developed solutions for both men and women—from arousal gels and lubricants to supplements and toys - serving a wide range of intimate health needs. With more than 4 million bottles sold and over 2,500 healthcare professionals recommending Promescent, Jeff has helped transform the company into a trusted name in sexual wellness. His direct, mission-driven approach continues to guide the brand’s growth and redefine how people connect—with themselves and each other. Get your 15% when ordering any products from Promescent - CLICK HERE Connect With Jeff Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
In this Halloween episode of 40 Plus: Gay Men. Gay Talk., host Rick Clemons sits down with UK-based author and creative professional Ricky Baxter to explore what it means to keep your creativity alive as a gay man over 40. They dive deep into the pressures LGBTQ+ men face to “fit in,” the fear of criticism that often silences creative expression, and why reclaiming your authentic voice is essential for aging with self-worth. From Ricky’s fantasy novel Blue Luna and the Apex Grail to lessons about relationships, rejection, and resilience, this conversation is a powerful reminder that creativity is not just art—it’s survival. In this episode you'll discover Why many gay men suppress their creativity—and how breaking free can restore confidence. How embracing creativity can help you resist settling for less in relationships and life. Why criticism doesn’t define you—and how to keep creating even when others don’t “get it.” About Ricky Ricky Baxter is a London born, fantasy author of novels and short novellas, amounting to 13 titles . He is an avid blogger, speaker and workshop leader, giving advice and thoughts to fellow creators from all walks of life. Starting out as a composer since graduating with a Ba(Hons) in music and multimedia, Ricky worked for many independent short film directors, gaining notable IMDB credits. Since then, he has embraced his earlier passion for writing fictional stories. Connect With Ricky Website Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
In this powerful episode, Eric Swanson activist, performer, and drag entertainer - aka Miss Bouvier - joins me to talk about what it really means to keep Pride alive when the world feels divided. From Florida’s political battlegrounds to global stages in Amsterdam, Eric opens up about using performance as protest, the legacy of Stonewall, and why LGBTQ+ unity is more vital than ever. What you will get in this episode  is truth-telling, hard-won hope, and a reminder that visibility is resistance. We discuss how... Visibility is power and how drag performance keep help keep LGBTQ+ culture alive in places trying to silence it. Global perspectives teach us the power of resilience, rights, and representation. Unity conquers fears - Why division within our community only serves those who want to erase us. About Eric As an actor and artist, Eric Swanson has been seen in regional productions of  “La Cage Aux Folles “ (Albin),  “Hairspray “ (Edna Turnblad),  “Hair “ (Margaret Mead),  “Chicago “ (Mary Sunshine) and  “Simply Gershwin “ with over 400 performances as leading man Frank. He is a fierce advocate for the arts and arts education having completed his bachelors in Music Education from Adrian College (2007). He is the former Choral Director of Middle and Upper Schools (2007-2012) at the prestigious Roeper School located in Birmingham, Michigan. From 2011-2021 he held the position of co-founder and Executive Director for The Detroit Actor’s Theatre Company. He holds two national directorial credits with his direction of  “Pray The Gay Away “ (2019) and  “Golden Girls, The Laughs Continue “(2022-currently touring), both produced by acclaimed producers Murray and Peter Present. of the struggle of working full time in the state of Florida as a drag performer. Miss Bouvèé debuted in March 2020 and is the live-singing drag persona of Eric Swanson. As Miss Bouvèé, she has charmed audiences in self produced sold out productions like her annual murder mysteries “Minnie Behind Bars” and “Minnie’s Merry Murder Christmas” and an original musical comedy “Double Trouble”. Miss Bouvèé travels the high seas with LGBTQIA+ groups like Adventure Bears, Island City Travel, and the national brand OutBound (GayCities Best Travel Group 2024). She has collaborated with cruise lines like Azamara, Norwegian, Royal Caribbean, Princess, and Celebrity Cruise Lines. Miss Bouvèé continues her arts and advocacy for underserved communities in Florida. She was vehemently opposed to SB1438 which banned public performances of drag and trans artists in the state of Florida. Her voice rose to national media attention when Out/Advocate magazine (June 2024) did a full feature on her which told the story In August 2023, Miss Bouvèé starred in the indie drag horror comedy and full feature f ilm “Big Easy Queens” which premiered at Popcorn Frights in Fort Lauderdale. Filmed entirely in the state of Florida during the infamous SB1438 drag ban, the film went on to win nearly a dozen awards including Best Actor for Eric Swanson as Miss Bouvee (Berlin Indie Film Festival), and played at over 40 festivals around the world. In 2024 Bouvèé was named Out South Florida’s (OutSFL) “Best Local Celebrity”, “Best Actor” and holds the title of “Best...
In this episode of 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk, Rick sits down with author Cas Holman - author, creative designer, and playful instigator, to explore the power of playfulness in adult life—and why it matters more than ever for gay men over 40. From family life to queerness to creativity, Cas shares insights from their new book and personal journey, reminding us that joy isn’t childish—it’s essential. 3 Key Takeaways From This Episode: Why playfulness boosts creativity, happiness, and adaptability in adulthood. How to reclaim your “play voice” and let go of judgment. Practical ways LGBTQ+ men can embrace possibility and stay open to joy.  About Cas Cas Holman is the founder and chief designer of the toy company Heroes Will Rise and a former professor of Industrial Design at RISD. Cas travels the globe speaking about playful learning, the design process, and the value of play in all aspects of life. She has shared her perspective in workshops and seminars with teams at Google, Nike, LEGO Foundation, Disney Imagineering, and art museums around the world. Some of her designs include toys like Rigamajig and Geemo, as well as play experiences at the High Line and the Liberty Science Center. Cas lives in Brooklyn and designs from her studio in the Catskills, New York. Connect With Cas Website Instagram Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
In this powerful National Coming Out Day episode, Rick Clemons sits down with Brian Bond, CEO of PFLAG National, to talk about the organization’s 52-year mission of supporting LGBTQ+ individuals and their families. From the history of PFLAG to personal coming out stories and the creation of affirming spaces across America, Brian shares how the movement has grown and why community support still matters more than ever, and how you as gay men over 40 can support and benefit from PFLAG Listeners will walk away with inspiration, resources, and encouragement to live authentically and help others do the same. Three Takeaways: The Power of Family Support – Why parents, siblings, and chosen families are critical in the coming-out journey. PFLAG’s Expanding Impact – How 40+ new chapters are creating affirming spaces in small towns nationwide. Hope, Healing, and Humanity – Brian’s personal stories of finding support, faith, and resilience in unexpected places. About Brian Brian K. Bond, a native of rural Missouri, joined PFLAG National in 2019. Under his leadership, the organization has experienced unprecedented growth at a time when LGBTQ+ people and those who love them are under assault in every corner of the country. This includes suing multiple states, including Texas Governor Greg Abbott for his abuse investigations into parents of transgender children, the first time in PFLAG’s 50-year history the organization has served as a plaintiff in such a case. With an extensive background in constituency outreach and coalition bridge-building, Brian has also strengthened PFLAG National’s deep commitment to ensuring PFLAG is a place where every family belongs. This includes the creation of PFLAG Connects: Communities, a safe, virtual monthly meeting space for families from typically underrepresented and marginalized communities. He also gained the commitment of the PFLAG National Board of Directors to invest in minority-owned depository institutions, a commitment to DEI that internationally recognized nonprofit leadership expert Joan Garry called, “…one of the most creative diversity and inclusion initiatives ever.” Prior to joining PFLAG National, Brian served in the Obama Administration as Deputy Director for the White House Office of Public Engagement and primary liaison for the LGBTQ community, the first to serve in that role. He also served in the Environmental Protection Agency as Associate Administrator for Public Engagement and Environmental Education. Prior to these roles, he served as the Executive Director of the Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund; the Coalitions Director for the Climate Action Campaign in Washington D.C., and as Deputy CEO for the 2016 Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. In 2024, President Biden appointed Brian to the non-partisan President’s Commission on White House Fellows. Connect With Brian Website Instagram Donate to PFLAG Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They...
Talking about condoms shouldn’t feel awkward—it should feel empowering. In this episode, I sit down with Milla Impola, a sexual health educator and advocate with ONE® Condoms, to explore how pleasure, safety, and confidence all go hand-in-hand. From the FDA approval of condoms for anal sex to the innovation of over 50 custom-fit sizes, Milla is breaking down barriers and building better conversations about sex. 3 Things That Kick Ass In This Episode... Learn why fit, comfort, and lube matter for condom confidence and pleasure. How ONE® Condoms is making safer sex tools approachable and inclusive. DiscoverThe power of open, shame-free conversations about sexual health and boundaries.   About Milla Milla Impola has a passion for increasing awareness and access to safer sex tools. One of Milla’s proudest achievements is highlighting the FDA approval of ONE® and MyONE® Custom Fit condoms for anal sex—the first condoms in the U.S. to receive this designation. She has also played a key role in developing workshops and educational content that make condom use more approachable, including promoting MyONE® Custom Fit, a revolutionary brand that offers over 50 sizes for a better fit and increased comfort. Committed to fostering engaging and accessible sexual health conversations, Milla has helped shape innovative outreach programs, including the ONE® Condoms Ambassador Program and ONE® On Stage, which merge creativity, community, and education. Whether working with students, healthcare providers, or the public, her goal is to ensure that everyone has the knowledge and resources they need to protect and enjoy their sexual well-being. Connect With Milla Website Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
In this episode, choreographer and dancer David Rousseve joins Rick to share his inspiring journey—from Princeton to law school to the dance stage. David opens up about the recent loss of his husband, his bold leap into the arts, and his upcoming performances in Pittsburgh and Los Angeles. Together, they explore themes of love, aging, resilience, and why following your passions is the boldest choice of all. In this episode you'll learn... How grief, resilience, and creativity can coexist and fuel self-expression. Why pursuing bold choices—at any stage of life—leads to true fulfillment. The power of art to create dialogue, connection, and meaning in community. About David David is a choreographer/writer/director/performer, Magna Cum Laude graduate of Princeton University and a Guggenheim Fellow. He is known for his dynamic, socially conscious dance/theater that uniquely blends contemporary dance, theater, and multimedia elements to create immersive and thought-provoking performances. His work draws inspiration from the stories of marginalized communities, as it explores complex themes related to identity, social justice, and human connection. Roussève founded the dance/theater company David Roussève/REALITY in 1988 in New York, and REALITY has since toured throughout the US, Europe, Great Britain and South America, including three commissions and four performance residencies at the Brooklyn Academy of Music’s Next Wave Festival and two commissions and three performance residencies at Jacob’s Pillow. Roussève’s most recent short film screened at 56 festivals in eleven countries and received ten awards, including four for “Best Film”. Other awards include a “Bessie”, Creative Capital Fellowship, three Horton Awards, Herb Alpert Award in the Arts and seven consecutive NEA Fellowships. Roussève is Distinguished Professor of Choreography in the department of World Arts and Cultures/Dance at UCLA where he has also served as Associate Dean, Acting Dean, and Interim Dean of the School of the Arts and Architecture Connect With David Website Instagram Facebook Hey Guys, Check This Out! Are you a guy who keeps struggling to do that thing? You know the thing you keep telling yourself and others you’re going to do, but never do? Then it’s time to get real and figure out why. Join the 40 Plus: Gay Men Gay Talk, monthly chats. They happen the third Monday of each month at 5:00 pm Pacific - Learn More! Also, join our Facebook Community - 40 Plus: Gay Men, Gay Talk Community Break free of fears. Make bold moves. Live life without apologies
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Comments (1)

Jeff Williams

I just discovered this podcast and love it so far!! Wrestling with my sexual identity my whole life - and currently going through a divorce - I'm relating to a lot of what I've heard so far.

May 28th
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