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Imported Horror
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Some people keep promises. Some people watch good movies. I did neither this week and let my intrusive thoughts convince me to watch Desert Monster (China, 2022) on Hi-Yah, a self-important monster flick that tries to deny it's B-movie bonnafides. Thankfully, Grady watched a good movie, Oddity (Ireland, 2024) on Shudder, a chilling blend of creepy house and Jewish folklore. We mourn the impromptu passing of Melissa, who was abducted and devoured by flying meatballs. Also, was Little Nicky a good movie or a great movie?
There are shark movies and there are shark movies. Ninja vs Shark (Japan, 2023) is definitely the former - a bonkers Power Rangers-y shark flick that gets derailed by tone deaf plotlines and an irredeemable protagonist. Also, two folk horror flicks drop this week: the somber Starve Acre (United Kingdom, 2024) on Shudder and the part-Japanese, part-found footage Bloat (France, United States & Japan, 2025) on VOD and limited theaters.
Do you prefer your cave monsters heavy and scary, or wildly ridiculous? Do you like happy birthdays, or celebrations with weird dialogue and flat jokes? Do you like playing with puppets? We ask the real questions this week as we go spelunking with The Cave (Germany, Australia & USA, 2005) on VOD, wonder if some "cult" films should stay forgotten with The Birthday (Spain, 2004) on Shudder and have weird fun with short films Stuffed and Meat Puppet on YouTube and Short of the Week.
What's the last unfamiliar vampire trope you encountered? Did it involve aristocratic face paint? This week, we get folksy with unique bloodsuckers in The Vourdalak (France, 2023) on Shudder and vengeful with The Sermon (United Kingdom, 2018) on Shortverse. Plus, we chat about the deep xenomorphic roots of the Metroid franchize and why you should avoid the cringey edgelord Coffee Table movie dropping on Shudder.
Did "The Creature from the Black Lagoon" need kung fu? Does an off-the-wall zombie plot twist need the B-movie treatment, or can it work in a serious movie? What do the top men at Tubi think of your genetics? This week, we get wild with Water Monster (China, 2019) on Hi-Yah and get amnesia with Die Alone (Canada & USA, 2024) on Tubi. We also play around with My Test Tubi and highlight fantasy horror, spooky nuns and mid-life crises dropping on VOD.
How do you judge a monster movie? If it's all about the practical effects, then The Tank (New Zealand, 2023) should slither into your eyeballs. If you want a creature feature with a sense of humor, though, head into the outback with Carnifex (Australia, 2022). Both are on Tubi. Also, a record-breaking Thai flick inspired by The Evil Dead hits Netflix and a vampire movie with the most on-the-nose title in history hits Shudder.
Does evil come from within us, or from family vacations to weird islands? What about weird sci-fi tunnels that close randomly? This week, we get gothic as all get out with Nosferatu (USA, United Kingdom & Hungary, 2024) and try to keep from spoiling Get Away (United Kingdom, 2024), Nick Frost's latest quotable horror comedy. Also, Marcus gets creeped the hell out by the short film Tunnelen (Norway, 2016, AKA The Tunnel) which Grady and Melissa manage to shrug off.
Every vampire movie feels familiar for a reason. This week, we dive into the OG horror flick - the century-old Nosferatu: A Symphony of Horror (Germany, 1922), a film that's easier to appreciate and admire than enjoy. Plus, we also flag "elder millennial" references in the short film Last Orders (United Kingdom, 2021) on Shortverse, chat about Florence Stoker and Joseph Campbell, and Marcus and Melissa make huge historical errors. One of them is funny; the other came from misremembering Queer for Fear on Shudder, a great documentary mini-series that I should rewatch before misquoting.
Has a Tinder date with a screenwriter ever gone really, really badly? Do you enjoy yoga on a picturesque bluff? Have you ever been trapped in a phone booth, or a vicious dictatorship with oblivious media censors? If so, good news! We take a slow walk in the woods with In A Violent Nature (Canada, 2024) on Shudder, get vengeful - maybe? maybe not? - with Play. Pause. Kill. (France, 2020) on Shortverse and get trapped in an absurdist Terry Gilliam-ish nightmare with La Cabina (Spain, 1972) on YouTube. Also, we recall the unrepeatable sex appeal of David Bowie and highlight a singy Bollywood horror comedy dropping on Netflix and the Swedish Evil Dead on Screambox and Tubi. Articles mentioned in this episode: "LA CABINA · THE PHONE BOOTH | Antonio Mercero | Review · Analysis" by Kristonkino on YouTube
Are you trapped in an existential crisis? Do you have aging parents with creepy woodworking talents? Have you ever refused to pay an exterminator? If so, good news! You'll feel seen by our episode this week as we chat about The Piper on Tubi, The Amazing Digital Circus on Netflix and Creswick on Shortverse. Also, if a meteor reversed Earth's polarity, how quickly would you get eaten by seabed monsters?
Guess who's back ... back again. We've got a new job, more sleep and a clean-ish bill of health, so we're hopping back on the spooky train. We chat a bit about the last few months and share quick thoughts on Werewolves (awesome), Blood and Snow (definitely not awesome), The Well (ehhhh), Clock Tower (awesome) and a few other flicks and games.
What's your favorite 90s monster quote? Does un-funny office horror work? Could you read from a screen without tongue tying yourself? Get down on Friday with us this week as we get wild with the popcorny Carnifex (Australia, 2022) on Tubi, shrug at the wasted potential of The Belko Experiment on Tubi and get creeped out over late night snacks with Milk on Shortverse. Also, movies about bad dads and the wilderness are dropping this week and Melissa reminds us what George Romero called them instead of zombies.
What's more frightening: anticipation, or realization? Amorous zombies, or giant holes in the ground? We get weird this week with Japanese folk horror classic Onibaba (1964) on Max, ultra-Italian bizarro flick Cemetery Man (1994) on Shudder and the trippy Canadian short Deja Vu on Shortverse. Plus - what major Asian city has not been attacked by a giant monster?
Would you defend a werewolf in a court of law, even after it jumped the shark into a totally different movie? Would you hide from a villian named Scissorman? Would you pause a movie after discovering your toddler is afraid of the dark? We did! Join us this week as we chat about Wer (Romania & USA, 2013), Godzilla Minus One (Japan, 2023) and Monolith (Australia, 2022), plus upcoming video game remakes of slasher classic Clocktower, splattery zom-com Lillipop Chainsaw and spookfest Until Dawn.
After a waterlogged hiatus, we're pack to slice through the 2024 Chainsaw Awards. Which is better - The First Omen or Late Night With the Devil? Why were Sister Death and Project Wolf Hunting snubbed, and why is When Evil Lurks nominated for best wide release and best international movie? Pick a lane, Fangoria! Also, love you Nick Cage, but Longlegs (Canada & USA, 2024) is not a modern Silence of the Lambs. a bit overyped. We cut through the hype. Also, we revisit The First Omen and unpack trippy scifi arcs and unfortunate creature design in Joko Anwar's Nightmares and Daydreams (Indonesia, 2024). Articles mentioned in this episode: "The Wait Is Over: Here Are The 2024 FANGORIA CHAINSAW AWARDS Nominees," by Allison Melanson for Fangoria "How 'The First Omen' Channels '70s Horror Imagery and Remixes the Most Terrifying Scares From the 1976 Original, and What a Sequel Might Look Like," by William Earl for Variety "'The First Omen' Filmmaker's Pitch Was Bold Enough to Get Disney to Bite — and the MPA to Balk," by Kate Erbland for IndieWire
This week, Melissa explores a new-to-us website for short films and jives with Rhyme Or Die (United Kingdom, 2021), a blend of 8 Mile and Saw with killer beats. Grady watches Howl From Beyond The Fog (Japan, 2021), a fantastic practical effects kaiju flick with behind-the-scenes footage and a mischevious cat. Marcus watched Brazilian B-movie Cemetery of Lost Souls (2020) solo - big mistake, it needs a distracted crowd - and celebrated the campy alien action vibes of The Lair (UK, 2022). Also, Melissa just got back from a vacation that was very Colorado and Marcus' toddler relives the last scene of your favorite found footage movie. Here's a link to the Texas Monthly article we mentioned. Not horror, but an interesting read.
Sharks are our friends! We should swim with them! Join us as we dive into the chummy waters of the Seine for the "platonic ideal" of so-bad-it's-good shark flicks, Under Paris (France, 2024). Then, watch the sincere but flawed folk horror Black Forest (Brazil, 2018), but if you jump ahead to the 1:18.20 mark, you'll be treated to the finest wild, cheesy, and splattery B-grade goodness that Tubi has to offer. Also, Marcus gets thoroughly creeped out by Stopmotion (United Kingdom, 2023) and a very Tales from the Crypt-y anthology series from Indonesia hits Netflix. (Sidebar: Shark attacks are pretty rare and most of the time you can safely swim with many of them, Shark Week is coming up soon ... but we're not about to let that get in the way of fine cinema.)
What's scarier: Creatures from the uncanny valley crawling up to do horrifying things that shouldn't be possible for stop motion animation, or generations of serial killers stalking and scalping their victims? If you answered stop motion, you're right - that's undeniably freakier - but both options are totally worth watching. This week, Grady and Melissa are thoroughly chilled by Stopmotion (United Kingdom, 2023) and Marcus popped some popcorn for thirty years of creepy Danish slashers with Nightwatch (1994) and Nightwatch: Demons are Forever (2023). Plus - inky body horror and a Tubi surprise are dropping this week, and technical difficulties reawaken the AI-generated "Funk Bot" in the last seven-ish minutes. Articles mentioned in this episode: "Stopmotion director says his brand of animation is necromancy," by Tasha Robinson for Polygon "AMC Networks Promotes Emily Gotto to Senior Vice President of Acquisitions and Production for Shudder," by AMC Networks. Note: My memory of this release was fuzzy and I got some important details wrong, but the head of international acquisitions is still getting a big promotion and we still Stan Shudder.
Dive deep into fear with us this week as we wander into open waters, haunting forests and chilling catacombs. Melissa goes camping with a grisly throwback slasher in Cub (Belgium & Netherlands, 2014), Grady swims with cocaine-addled sharks that are just barely so-bad-they're-good in Deep Fear (UK & France, 2023) and Marcus gets lost in the ruins under Paris in the other Deep Fear (Belgium & France, 2022). Also - sure you've seen insane apocalyptic car chases before, but should you see Furiosa anyway? And, will the shark flick swimming onto Netflix next week be better?
Just a quick update this week - zoomer humor slays in the trailer for Killer Body Count (Canada & South Africa, 2024), possibly the most Tubi movie to ever Tubi, and the original Nightwatch (Denmark, 1994) has all the offbeat Blockbuster Energy vibes and some himbo-y surprises. Plus, we're taking a week to get stoked for patriarchal nightmare fuel In Flames (2023, Pakistan & Canada) and animated chills in Stopmotion (United Kingdom, 2023). Articles mentioned in this episode: "'In Flames' – Exclusive Clip from Pakistani Psychological Thriller Has Visions of the Dead," by John Squires for Bloody Disgusting "Killer Body Count | Official Trailer | A Tubi Original" on YouTube



