Dam Internet, You Scary!

Head to  https://www.tryfum.com/DIYS to get your free gift with purchase, and start The Good Habit today!If you like your money, Mint Mobile is for you. Shop plans at https://MINTMOBILE.com/diys Patrick Cloud sits down with comedian, host, and  luxury car salesman Charlie Wilson for one of the most honest and insightful conversations on Damn Internet, You Scary!This episode covers Charlie’s wild career journey from Louisiana to Dallas to New York to Vegas to Chicago to Los Angeles, and how he built a life across car sales, stand-up comedy, hosting, producing, and live entertainment.They talk about:what it was really like selling Volkswagens, Cadillacs, Range Rovers, and Maseratishow car sales taught Charlie how to read people and closehow he got into stand-up comedyhis first TV pilot experiencehow he became the host of a Star Wars burlesque showwhat life on the road is really like with live entertainment residenciestea rituals, anxiety, and creating a calmer morning routinestretching, health, and protecting your body while working nightsleaving comfort behind to build something biggerwhy fear keeps people from betting on themselveshow to balance multiple careers while still chasing the long gameThis episode is a real conversation about hustle, reinvention, timing, and building a creative life that actually fits who you are.Subscribe to Damn Internet, You Scary! for more weekly episodes, interviews, weird internet stories, and real conversations.00:00 LA Noise, Sleep, and Fan Talk00:03:32 Charlie’s Backstory: Louisiana, Dallas, New York, Vegas, Chicago, LA00:05:24 Show Intro and Introducing Charlie Wilson00:06:06 How Charlie Got Into Selling Cars00:08:22 From Volkswagen to Maserati00:09:53 Cars First, Then Comedy00:11:31 Why Selling Cars Is Like Dating00:13:08 How Charlie Knew Entertainment Was the Goal00:14:31 First Open Mic and Early TV Pilot Experience00:16:11 How the Star Wars Burlesque Show Happened00:20:33 What a Star Wars Burlesque Show Day Actually Looks Like00:24:06 What Charlie Does as the Host of the Show00:26:21 Behind the Scenes of the Star Wars Burlesque Cast00:29:00 Tea Rituals, Anxiety, and Daily Calm00:32:15 Charlie’s Favorite Teas and Why He Drinks Them00:35:10 Nighttime Tea, Sleep, and Better Routines00:36:17 Stretching, Content Ideas, and Building a Wellness Brand00:37:37 Why Morning Rituals Became Non-Negotiable00:42:28 Balancing Nightlife Work with Health and Recovery00:45:08 Leaving Comfort to Build Something Bigger00:46:58 Why Fear Keeps People Stuck00:50:14 Finding Time for Comedy While Working Multiple Jobs00:52:14 Star Wars Hosting as the Perfect Compromise00:53:56 How Big Opportunities Can Change the Whole Grind00:56:01 Bingo Loco and Charlie’s Other Hosting Gig00:57:54 Creating Original Live Experiences and Bigger Career Vision01:00:13 Seasons of Life, Career Pivots, and Timing01:01:13 Closing Thoughts and Why This Conversation Matters01:02:34 Charlie’s Upcoming Shows and Where to Follow Him01:03:28 Outro01:04:56 Ad Read Section Begins01:05:33 Mint Mobile Ad01:08:09 Füm Ad01:10:10 Ad Read Debrief and ChatGPT Writing TalkJoin our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

SponsorsBlueChewTry BlueChew Gold and get 10% off your first month with code DIYS at https://www.BlueChew.comFactorHead to https://factormeals.com/diys50off and use code DIYS50OFF to get 50% off plus free breakfast for a year.KikoffBuild credit fast and get your first month for just a dollar at https://getkikoff.com/DIYS today. Thanks to Kikoff for sponsoring us!Patrick Cloud is joined by Brandon Cormell for a full episode of Dam Internet, You Scary! packed with weird news, hilarious debates, and internet stories that somehow keep getting stranger.This episode starts with a real conversation about writing, improv, and when actors should stick to the script, then quickly turns into one of those classic DIYS episodes where the topics go completely off the rails.They get into:whether you would eat the same meal every day to be perfectly healthywhether hunting is better than being huntedtrading years of your life for moneya racehorse that was secretly turned into soupthe worst things people have found in their foodthe woman who caused an emergency landing by lighting matches after farting on a planefake airplane parts being sold to major airlinesa family bringing a dead relative to the bank as proof of deathawkward teenage penguinsa WWII pigeon carrying a coded messagea beetle photo that looks like a masked human facethe creepy dead bride mannequin legendfolklore creatures, Gumberoo, and why Bigfoot might be old newsLots of laughs, a few dark turns, and plenty of “how is this real?” moments.Subscribe for more episodes of Damn Internet, You Scary!Join our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary00:00 Intro: Writing, Improv, and Letting Actors Cook00:00:46 Patrick Introduces the Show and Guest Host Brandon Cormell00:01:27 What It’s Like Being a Writer00:02:07 When Actors Go Off Script00:03:22 Icebreakers Begin00:03:46 Would You Eat the Same Meal Every Day to Be Healthy?00:06:10 Would You Rather Be Hunted or Hunt to Survive?00:07:57 Would You Trade 5 Years of Life for $10 Million?00:09:02 Racehorse Secretly Slaughtered and Served in a Soup Kitchen00:12:51 BlueChew Ad00:15:21 Worst Thing You’ve Ever Found in Food00:18:40 Woman Causes Emergency Landing After Lighting Matches for Her Farts00:23:27 Plane Confessions and Blaming the Wrong Person00:25:43 Fake Airplane Parts Sold to Real Airlines00:30:10 Fear of Flying, Boeing Talk, and Pilot Sleep Stories00:32:48 Family Brings Dead Relative to the Bank for Proof of Death00:34:39 Factor Ad00:36:48 Inheritance Drama and Why Death Brings Out the Worst in People00:38:34 Teenage Penguins Look Awkward as Hell00:40:59 The WWII Carrier Pigeon That Never Delivered Its Message00:45:04 Creepy Beetle Photo That Looks Like a Human Face00:47:10 Animal Cruelty, Horse Racing, and Pit Bull Stereotypes00:48:06 Kikoff Ad00:50:54 Dead Bride Mannequin Urban Legend00:54:25 Day of the Dead, Coco, and When a Person Really Dies00:57:55 Gumbo Roux Folklore and the Lumberjack Era01:01:20 Is Bigfoot Old News? Frog Man and Modern Folklore01:02:20 Brandon Promotes The Airport01:03:45 Patrick’s Closing Plugs and Outro

Sponsors:BetterHelpCelebrate the people in your life who support you and remember that your mental health matters. Get 10% off your first month at: https://betterhelp.com/DIYSIndaCloud: If you’re 21 or older, get 35% OFF your first order @IndaCloud with code [DIYS] at https://inda.shop/DIYS #indacloudpod Dam Internet, You Scary! hosts Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore break down the disturbing but interesting stories on the internet!This episode starts with Tahir explaining why he ended up taking a Greyhound bus during a comedy tour and how the trip quickly became a story he will never forget.The conversation moves into several bizarre internet stories including:• Ray-Ban smart glasses and privacy concerns• A fake nurse who treated thousands of patients• A food vlogger who died after eating a poisonous crab• People paying $200,000 for cryogenic freezing after deathAlong the way the hosts debate survival strategies, discuss internet culture, and share some hilarious hypotheticals.Lots of laughs and a great conversation throughout.Join our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary00:00 Intro & Greyhound Story Begins00:01 Comedy Tour Chaos Before the Bus Ride00:04 Why Tahir Took a Greyhound Instead of Flying00:05 The Greyhound Bus Experience00:08 Grinding Through Comedy Struggles00:11 BetterHelp Sponsor Message00:14 Would You Fake Your Own Death?00:21 Survival Island Debate00:26 Would You Eat Raw Fish to Survive?00:27 Naked and Afraid Seasoning Debate00:33 Meta Ray-Ban Smart Glasses Privacy Concerns00:37 Fake Nurse Treated 4,000 Patients00:42 Food Vlogger Dies After Eating Poisonous Crab00:45 In The Cloud Sponsor Message00:46 What Is a Semicolon? Grammar Debate00:50 The Fudge Shop Musical Performance Story00:55 People Paying $200K for Cryogenic Freezing00:59 Aliens Reviving Humans?01:00 Outro

Cash AppDownload Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/crftch8p #CashAppPod. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Cash App Green, overdraft coverage, borrow, cash back offers and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.GLDNew customers get 50% Off with code DIYS at https://www.GLD.comBlue ChewGet 10% off your first month of BlueChew Gold with code DIYS. That’s promo code DIYS. Visit https://www.BlueChew.com for more details and important safety informationDam Internet, You Scary! hosts Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore break down the disturbing but interesting stories on the internet!This episode gets wild as Patrick Cloud and guest Jordan Conley dive into the strangest stories from the internet.Topics include:• Scientists teaching human brain cells to play Doom• The possibility of a robot apocalypse• A mysterious Frog Man cryptid sighting• The chilling Villisca Ax Murder ghost story• Pokémon debates and apocalypse survival plansIf you enjoy weird internet stories, conspiracies, and hilarious commentary, this episode is for you.Subscribe for new episodes of Dam Internet You Scary every week.00:00 Intro + Jordan Conley Joins01:11 Finding the Show on Social Media03:27 Icebreaker: Top 3 Pokémon08:33 Would You Fight a Wolf or Outrun Bees?12:41 Movie Deaths and Dark Disney Moments14:47 Sponsor: Cash App16:21 Pokémon Evolutions + Chat Jokes17:47 Could You Survive a Year Underground?20:13 Costco Apocalypse Survival Strategy24:36 Human Brain Cells Playing Doom28:49 Robot Apocalypse Theory32:50 Sponsor: GLD Jewelry36:00 The Computer Loading Icon Has a Weird Name39:30 The Skunk Creature Legend41:43 Frog Man Sightings Explained44:04 Sponsor: BlueChew45:29 AI Videos and Fake Paranormal Footage47:54 The Villisca Ax Murder Ghost54:02 Haunted House Tours01:03:00 Jordan Conley Plugs Comedy Show01:06:55 Episode OutroJoin our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

🎧 Support The ShowDon’t sleep on  @UltraPouches   New customers get 15% Off with code [DIYS] at https://www.takeultra.com #UltraPouches #adxSwitch to Mint Mobile: https://www.mintmobile.com/DIYS New customers can make the switch today and for a limited time, get unlimited premium wireless for just $15 per month.KIKOFF: Build credit fast and get your first month for just a dollar at https://getkikoff.com/DIYS today. Thanks to Kikoff for sponsoring us!FUM: Head to  https://www.tryfum.com/DIYS to get your free gift with purchase, and start The Good Habit today!🎟 Tour DatesCatch Tahir live:Columbus, OH – March 6Louisville, KY – March 7 (Birthday Show!)Chattanooga, TN – March 8Tickets available via Tahir’s Instagram bio.Guest:  @BTKingsley5225 https://www.instagram.com/btkingsley  @KillinItPod  Dam Internet, You Scary! hosts Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore break down the disturbing but interesting stories on the internet!Is Waymo about to replace Uber? Would you rather survive a plane crash or a shipwreck? And is Sony really making TVs that force you to shout brand names to skip ads?!In this episode of Dam Internet, You Scary!, Tahir Moore and Patrick Cloud are joined by B.T. Kingsley to break down:Self-driving cars taking over citiesSony’s interactive ad patentA $160,000 diamond traded for $20 worth of weedPlastic surgery travelers detained at airportsThe future of rap music longevitySubscription EVERYTHING in AmericaAnd some of the pettiest icebreakers everPlus, real talk about comedy, respect for craft, and why everybody thinks they can “just try stand-up.”00:00 – Gym Before Shows & Birthday Goals02:50 – Lying for Chaos & Losing Celebrity Mystery06:50 – Personal Opinions & Internet Sensitivity09:40 – Giving Advice in Comedy & Content Creation16:25 – Is Comedy Central Dead? Industry Evolution17:40 – Ultra Ad Read20:25 – Introducing B.T. Kingsley24:10 – Icebreakers: Plane Crash vs Shipwreck28:10 – Would You Eat Something Gross to Avoid Getting Sick?30:45 – Waymo Paying DoorDash Drivers?!33:00 – The Future of Driving & Flying Cars38:20 – Mint Mobile Ad Read41:05 – Sony TV Patent: Shout Brand Names to Skip Ads46:30 – UPS Worker Traded $160K Diamond for $20 Weed52:10 – Plastic Surgery Passport Problems56:30 – How the World Views Americans58:00 – Why Is McDonald's Always Packed?1:03:10 – Kickoff Credit Builder Ad1:07:10 – The State of Rap & Respecting Creative Craft1:15:30 – Tour Dates & ClosingJoin our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

Factor MealsEat smart without the stress.Go to 👉 https://factormeals.com/diys50offUse code DIYS50OFF for 50% off + free breakfast for a year.BlueChewElevate without hesitation.Visit 👉 https://bluechew.comUse code DIYS for 10% off BlueChew Gold.Dam Internet, You Scary! hosts Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore break down the disturbing but interesting stories on the internet!The Olympics are getting WILD 😳This week on Dam Internet, You Scary!, we break down:• Ski jumpers accused of using injections for aerodynamic advantage• Curling cheating caught on secret cameras• A man who broke into Little Caesars… just to make pizzas• Etsy finally banning witches and spellcasters• The Louvre getting scammed out of $11 MILLION• Singapore punishing scammers with mandatory caning• A church miracle that turned out to be sewage water 🤢Plus chaotic hypotheticals like:Would you survive 30 days alone in the woods for $1 million?Would you let a stranger control your life for 24 hours for $100K?🎟️ TOUR DATESTahir Moore – Detroit & NYCKeysha E – Detroit & AtlantaCheck their socials for ticket links!00:00 Atlanta Glow Up + Booty Club Salmon Debate00:03 Show Intro + Keesha E Joins00:07 Keesha’s Husband Requirements00:12 True Crime Couple Ad00:15 $1 Million Survival Question00:20 Would You Let a Stranger Control You for $100K?00:24 Olympic Ski Jumper Injection Scandal00:28 Curling Cheating Exposed00:30 Factor Ad Read00:41 Man Breaks Into Little Caesars to Sell Pizza00:44 Etsy Bans Spellcasters00:46 Weirdest Things Bought Online00:49 BlueChew Ad Read00:52 The Louvre $11M Tour Scam00:57 Singapore Scammers Get Caned01:02 Anonymous Boss Call-Out Service01:02 “Holy Water” Turns Out to Be Sewage01:05 Show Outros + Tour DatesJoin our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

GLDNew customers get 50% Off with code [DIYS]  https://www.gld.comBetterHelpGet 10% off at https://www.betterhelp.com/DIYSCash AppDownload Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/crftch8p #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Cash App Green, overdraft coverage, borrow, cash back offers and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.IndaCloudIf you’re 21 or older, get 35% OFF your first order @IndaCloud with code [DIYS] at https://inda.shop/[DIYS]! #indacloudpod Dam Internet, You Scary! hosts Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore break down the disturbing but interesting stories on the internet! On this episode of Dam Internet, You Scary!, Tahir Moore and Patrick Cloud are joined by Kali Scott for one of the wildest episodes yet.https://www.instagram.com/likekaliscott👍 Like💬 Comment your wildest jury excuse🔔 Subscribe for weekly episodes🎧 Available on all podcast platformsWe cover:• Finding out your friend secretly has an 18-year-old• Jury duty chaos and suing people• Would you cut off your finger to survive?• Dating a “feeder” (yes, that’s real)• 71 witnesses who ALL claimed they were in the bathroom• A man who filled golf holes with human poop for 13 years• Nike’s new sneaker tech that might end reselling• Vasectomy horror stories (yes, he was awake)This episode goes from hilarious to unhinged very quickly.00:00 – Secret 18-Year-Old Daughter Reveal04:15 – Suing People & Jury Duty Stories08:40 – Crazy Horse Trial & School Field Trips13:50 – Sacramento Love & Icebreakers Begin15:15 – Would You Cut Off Your Finger to Survive?21:40 – Bedroom Turn-Offs & Sex Playlist Confessions28:55 – Tribe Called Quest Sex Story31:30 – Dating a “Feeder” (Wild Trend Explained)38:25 – BetterHelp Ad42:00 – 71 Witnesses Claimed They Were in the Bathroom46:45 – The Golf Course Poop Mystery (13 Years)51:40 – Nike’s Secret Sneaker Authentication Tech56:40 – Cash App Ad59:35 – James Van Der Beek & Health Scare Talk01:01:00 – Vasectomy Story (Graphic Details)01:08:55 – In The Cloud Ad01:12:10 – Vasectomy Procedure Continued01:16:15 – Condoms vs Vasectomy Debate01:19:35 – Guest Plugs & Netflix Is A Joke Announcement01:23:00 – OutroJoin our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

PrizePicksVisit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/DIYS and use code DIYS and get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup!KikoffBuild credit fast and get your first month for just a dollar at https://getkikoff.com/DIYS today. Thanks to Kikoff for sponsoring us!BlueChew GOGet 10% off your first month with code DIYS at https://www.bluechew.com Dam Internet, You Scary! hosts Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore break down the disturbing but interesting stories on the internet!Guest: https://www.instagram.com/sydneyisfunnySome places feel weird.Some people feel off.And sometimes… your cactus dying is a reflection of your spirit.On this episode of Dam Internet, You Scary!, Tahir Moore and Patrick Cloud are joined by comedian Sydney Castillo to break down bad vibes, strange energy, judgmental stores, plant-filled Airbnbs, and whether you can feel when something just isn’t right.They also dive into:Killing succulents (and what that says about you)The Doomsday ClockA doctor saving a man’s hand by attaching it to his legSelf-driving cars hitting pedestriansJoin our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary👍 Like this episode💬 Comment: Do you believe in bad vibes?🔔 Subscribe for new episodes of Dam Internet, You Scary!🎧 Listen on all podcast platforms00:00 – Cold Open/Intro03:45 – Plants, Energy & Being a Bad Plant Parent08:55 – The Joshua Tree Airbnb With Unreal Energy13:35 – People With Bad Vibes17:40 – Stores With Weird Energy (Trader Joe’s)22:10 – Checking Receipts After Arguments26:00 – Text vs Call vs FaceTime30:05 – City Life vs Quiet Living34:45 – PrizePicks Ad38:05 – The Doomsday Clock43:10 – Hand Saved by Being Attached to a Leg50:30 – BlueChew GO Ad53:40 – Waymo Self-Driving Car Hits a Child58:55 – Sydney Castillo Show Plug01:00:10 – Outro

💰 SPONSOR: MINT MOBILEIf you’re trying to make smarter financial choices this year, check out Mint Mobile. Get 50% off unlimited premium wireless plans starting at just $15/month. ➡️ Go to https://www.mintmobile.com/diysUnlimited talk & text, high-speed data, nationwide 5G coverage, and you keep your phone and number.In this episode of Dam Internet, You Scary!, Hosts Patrick Cloud  and Tahir Moore break down the wildest real internet stories you couldn’t make up if you tried. From a Florida woman arrested with drugs in a bag labeled “Definitely Not Drugs,” to a man who panicked and cut off his own finger after a snake bite that wasn’t even venomous, the chaos is nonstop.We also get into:Internet icebreakers gone wrongDating honesty that went way too farCanceling plans, food discipline, and pizza relapseRubber duck mind games that made a cleaner quitTheme park tragedy and real-life consequencesWhy social media might actually be frying our brains00:00 Cold Open: Diets, Bone Broth, and Anchovy Trauma04:41 Politics, Fear, and Feeling “Too Adult”11:08 If You Had to Leave the Country Right Now…14:53 Icebreaker Chaos: When to Say the Truth20:26 Getting Kicked Out Mid-Hookup (Twice)24:42 Canceling Plans vs Getting Canceled On28:18 Food Discipline, Pizza Relapse, and Aging31:15 Ad Break: Mint Mobile (50% Off Unlimited)37:08 Social Media Addiction & Celebrity Overexposure42:08 Florida Woman Arrested With “Definitely Not Drugs”44:38 Cleaner Quits After Rubber Duck Scavenger Hunt50:22 Woman Dies on Universal Studios Ride55:09 Man Cuts Off Finger After Snake Bite Panic58:14 Final Thoughts + Tour Dates + Outro🔔 SUPPORT THE SHOW👍 Like the video💬 Drop a comment (Which story messed you up the most?)📺 Subscribe for weekly episodes🔔 Turn on notifications so you don’t miss the chaosJoin our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

Factor MealsSkip the cooking and eat clean with Factor’s ready-to-eat meals.Get 50% off your first box + free breakfast for a year👉 Visit https://www.factormeals.com/DIYS50 and use code DIYS50BlueChewBoost performance with BlueChew Gold.Get 10% off your first month👉 Visit https://www.bluechew.com and use promo code DIYShttps://www.instagram.com/brandideniseboydTahir Moore and Patrick Cloud is joined by comedian Brandi Denise for an episode packed with wild science facts, unhinged internet stories, and brutally honest takes on therapy, food, and technology.We’re talking:• Sea slugs that cut off their own heads to survive• Chess robots that break kids’ fingers• Why gas station food might actually be elite• Therapy being overrated (sometimes)• AI voices changing on people• South Korea’s real-life “relaxation prison”Plus travel stories from Japan, childhood confessions, and why robots might already be plotting against usJoin our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary00:00 Holiday Trees, Travel Chaos & Brandi Denise Joins03:05 Japan Travel, Osaka Stories & Culture Shock09:11 What’s Overrated? Therapy Takes Get Real11:25 What’s Underrated? Gas Station Food Debate16:38 Things People Pretend to Like19:29 🔔 Ad Break: Factor Meals23:03 Sea Slugs That Decapitate Themselves to Survive29:09 Childhood Animal Stories Get Dark34:44 Why Salt Kills Slugs (Science Explained)36:28 🔔 Ad Break: BlueChew38:43 Chess Robot Breaks a Kid’s Finger44:26 AI Voices, Privacy & Tech Anxiety52:13 South Korea’s Relaxation Prison Explained56:42 Where Would You Move If Money Didn’t Matter?01:04:05 Brandi Denise Projects & Tour Dates01:06:15 Final Thoughts & Sign-OffSubscribe for more episodes of Dam Internet, You Scary!New episodes weekly featuring comedians, wild stories, and internet chaos.🎟️ Tour Dates & Tickets🎙️ Podcast Clips📲 Follow the Hosts#DamInternetYouScary #PatrickCloud #BrandiDenise #ComedyPodcast #WeirdInternet #AIStories #AnimalFacts #GasStationFood

Download Cash App Today: [https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/crftch8p] #CashAppPod. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Cash App Green, overdraft coverage, borrow, cash back offers and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.If you’re 21 or older, get 25% OFF your first order + free shipping on orders $89+ @IndaCloud with code [DIYS] at https://inda.shop/[DIYS]! #indacloudpodThe internet is already doing too much in 2026.In this episode of Dam Internet, You Scary!, Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore sit down with Khleo Thomas to break down everything from dating expectations and social media overstimulation to AI robots, dystopian futures, and the wildest news stories on the internet right now.We talk:Why dating feels like a monthly expenseHow social media drains your energy before noonAI robots replacing humans (and using up our water)A man arrested with over 100 skeletons in his basementInternet fame, clickbait beef, and why nothing shocks us anymoreTech nostalgia, childhood dreams, and adult moneyKhleo Thomas’ NAACP Image Award nominationVote Here: https://naacpeoty.judge.live/categories/6ef87081-d4ec-405a-ac86-08de4c8933d8/entrantsThis episode is funny, uncomfortable, and way too real.00:00 – Cold Open: Dating Expectations & “Paying for Everything”02:01 – Welcome to Damn Internet, You Scary!03:14 – Guest Intro: Khleo Thomas05:10 – Social Media Overstimulation & Morning Phone Habits10:41 – Dating Costs, Red Flags & Relationship Expectations18:40 – Selena Powell, Rappers & Internet Villain Energy25:02 – Why Men Ignore Warnings in Dating31:12 – Would You Rather: Late With an Excuse or On Time Miserable?40:15 – Being Early, Airports & Anxiety47:10 – Tech Unboxings, Collecting & Organization55:20 – Living Childhood Dreams as Adults01:02:55 – Disneyland Turkey Leg Debate01:06:35 – Kraft Mac & Cheese vs Homemade (Conversion Story)01:12:05 – Cash App Ad Read01:15:50 – Robot Club Sightings in Vegas01:19:40 – AI Robots Replacing Humans01:23:05 – AI Using Water & Dystopian Future Talk01:29:00 – Internet Fame, Clickbait & Manufactured Beef01:35:10 – Man Arrested With 100 Skeletons in His Basement01:43:45 – Why Nothing Surprises Us Anymore01:47:50 – In The Cloud Ad Read (THC Gummies & Drinks)01:52:35 – Cookie Monster’s Real Name01:58:40 – Tickle Me Elmo & 90s Toy Chaos02:06:20 – Old Cell Phones, Razr Era & Tech Nostalgia02:18:30 – Khleo Thomas NAACP Image Award Nomination02:24:50 – Where to Vote for Khleo02:27:45 – Upcoming Shows & Closing

— SPONSORS —This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.🧠 BetterHelphttps://betterhelp.com/diys💪 BlueChewhttps://bluechew.comCode: DIYS🏀 PrizePicksVisit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/DIYS and use code DIYS and get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup!In this episode of Dam Internet, You Scary!, We break down some of the wildest stories making the rounds online — from Japan attempting pizza delivery by reindeer, to a bar serving whiskey with a real human toe, to debates about eating bugs, camel meat, and where food curiosity should stop.Along the way, the conversation turns into something deeper:emotional control, discipline, internet outrage, authenticity, viral clips taken out of context, and why trying to please everyone online is a losing game.This episode blends comedy, culture, and commentary — exactly the way the internet delivers it.👇 Use chapters to jump to the stories you want00:00 – New Year Kickoff & Live Chat Chaos02:08 – Diet Changes, Weight Loss & Discipline Talk09:27 – No Drinking, Vegas & Lifestyle Shifts11:35 – Texting Back: Immediately or On Purpose?14:03 – Blocking vs Muting People Online18:10 – Did Jesus Drink? Internet Theology Debate20:44 – Playing It Safe vs Being Authentic Online26:03 – Why You Can’t Please Everyone on the Internet33:31 – Emotional Control & Viral Altercations39:07 – Embracing “Boring” & Morning Routines45:59 – Japan Tried Pizza Delivery by Reindeer50:23 – Whiskey Served With a Real Human Toe55:02 – Eating Bugs While Traveling58:28 – Camel Meat, Camel Hump & Food Limits01:09:04 – Are Cats Linked to Schizophrenia?01:14:56 – Tour Dates & Episode Wrap-Up💬 Question for the comments:Which story crossed the line for you — reindeer pizza, toe whiskey, or camel hump?👍 Like📺 Subscribe📤 Share with someone who loves weird internet stories#DamInternetYouScary #WeirdNews #InternetCulture #ComedyPodcast #StrangeStories

Uber helicopters?! Robot cars?! Bad tattoos?! Hosts Tahir Moore and Patrick Cloud sit down with special guests from the Unhinged & Immoral Podcast to break down: Uber’s plan to add helicopters and seaplanes Waymo driverless cars and whether they’re actually safer A wild LA night that ended in tattoos The pettiest reasons people unfollow each other Insane internet crime stories you won’t believe This episode is funny, chaotic, and exactly why the internet cannot be trusted. 🎧 Listen on all podcast platforms 📺 Watch full episodes on YouTube 👉 Subscribe for weekly episodes 👉 Like & comment your thoughts on Uber helicopters 👉 Share this episode with someone who would DEFINITELY try a robot car Guests: https://www.instagram.com/unhingedandimmoralpod/ Jamila https://www.instagram.com/_iamjamila/ Mecca https://www.instagram.com/meccavellii/ 00:00 – Intro & Welcome to Dam Internet, You Scary! 00:25 – Introducing the Guest (Unhinged & Immoral Podcast) 01:54 – New Year Plans & Podcast Growth 03:41 – LA Night Out That Got Way Too Real 04:22 – Tattoos, Birthdays & Drunk Decisions 06:28 – Icebreaker: Cartoon Voices You’d Switch With 09:35 – Best Versus Battles Ever 13:22 – Bow Wow vs Soulja Boy Cultural Moment 15:08 – Distracted Driving & Clubhouse Horror Story 18:02 – Cutting Hair After a Breakup 19:16 – Pettiest Reasons to Unfollow Someone 23:50 – Uber Adding Helicopters & Seaplanes 27:00 – Ghetto Helicopters & Flight Nightmares 29:33 – Waymo Robot Cars Explained 31:51 – Why Waymo Is Cheaper Than Uber 35:20 – Would You Trust a Driverless Car? 37:29 – $135K Found at an ATM 38:42 – Would You Keep the Money? 41:16 – Sacramento Stories & City Culture 45:18 – Man Claims Cockroach Told Him to Kill 46:30 – Laced Weed & Real Drug Horror Stories 52:02 – Cocaine, Meth & Nose Collapse Story 56:32 – Guest Plugs & Final Thoughts Join our Patreon now!!  https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

The holidays can bring up a lot — stress, pressure, old memories, and emotions we don’t always talk about. BetterHelp makes therapy accessible, flexible, and tailored to you. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at 👉 https://www.betterhelp.com/DIYS Dam Internet, You Scary! hosts Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore break down the disturbing but interesting stories on the internet! Christmas looks different when you’re grown — and this episode proves it. On this Christmas Edition of Dam Internet, You Scary!, Tahir Moore and Patrick Cloud are joined by comedians Tyler Chronicles and Correy Bell for a holiday conversation that quickly spirals into petty lies, fast food chaos, TSA conspiracies, therapy talk, and stories that definitely went too far. From haunted houses and mugshots to Little Caesars arrests and White Castle regrets, this episode covers everything you didn’t know you needed on Christmas Day. 🔔 Subscribe & Support • Subscribe for weekly episodes • Like the video to help the algorithm • Drop a comment with your wildest Christmas story • Share this episode with someone who eats Little Caesars on purpose 00:00 – Christmas Fits & Gingerbread Jerseys 01:25 – Guest Intro: Tyler Chronicles Returns 04:20 – Christmas Gifts Don’t Hit the Same as an Adult 07:35 – Warning Labels That Should Exist 13:05 – Haunted Houses & Death Disclosure Laws 15:55 – TSA, Airports & Why Rom-Coms Are Dead 18:05 – BetterHelp Holiday Ad 21:05 – Petty Lies That Got Way Out of Hand 31:00 – Law & Order SVU & TV Cop Logic 36:20 – Mugshots, Selfies & Image Control 43:30 – Pizza Rankings & Fast Food Takes 46:10 – Florida Woman Arrested Racing to Little Caesars 51:20 – White Castle, Chicken Chains & Regret Meals 58:00 – Secret Menus & Extreme Food Combos 1:00:45 – Therapy, Growth & Holiday Reflections 1:02:20 – Birthdays, Holidays & Episode Wrap-Up Join our Patreon now!!  https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

Sponsors:  Prize Picks Visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/DIYS and use code DIYS and get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup! Kikoff  Help your credit survive the holidays & get your first month FREE at https://getkikoff.com/DIYS  today. Thanks to Kikoff for sponsoring us! Miracle Made Upgrade your sleep with Miracle Made! Go to https://trymiracle.com/DIYS and use the code DIYS to claim your FREE 3 PIECE TOWEL SET and SAVE over 40% OFF. BlueChew Visit bluechew.com and use promo code DIYs for 10% off your first month. Dam Internet, You Scary! hosts Patrick Cloud and Tahir Moore break down the disturbing but interesting stories on the internet! Instagram got people lying, exaggerating, and performing for likes — and we finally had to talk about it. In this episode, we break down how social media warped real life, share wild childhood stories, and react to some of the craziest real-world news you’ve ever heard — from a fake flight attendant flying free for years to a man stealing a city bus and continuing the route like nothing happened. If you’ve ever felt like the internet made people delusional… this episode is for you. 00:00 – Cold Open: Immediate Chaos 09:14 – Official Introductions 18:30 – Price Picks Ad Read 20:31 – Weird Smells People Secretly Love 26:19 – Things You Ate as a Kid That Were… Questionable 31:04 – Growing Up in Dangerous Cities 37:32 – Childhood Survival Stories 41:20 – Fake Flight Attendant Flew Free 120 Times 49:16 – Man Steals Bus and Continues the Route 56:04 – Chess Player Poisons Opponent’s Pieces 01:03:06 – Black Cinema & Movie Debates 01:06:05 – Getting Robbed in Real Life 01:09:00 – Detroit Stories Sound Fake (But Aren’t) 01:10:28 – Where to Find the Guests 01:14:35 – Final Plugs & Wrap-Up 👍 Like the video 💬 Comment: Is Instagram ruining real life? 🔔 Subscribe for weekly episodes 📲 Follow us on all platforms Join our Patreon now!!  https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

Miracle Made - Upgrade your sleep with Miracle Made! Go to https://trymiracle.com/DIYS and use the code DIYS to claim your FREE 3 PIECE TOWEL SET and SAVE over 40% OFF. IndaCloud - If you’re 21 or older, get 25% OFF your first order + free shipping @IndaCloud with code [DIYS] at https://inda.shop/DIYS #indacloudpod Factor - Eat smart at https://www.FactorMeals.com/diys50off and use code diys50off to get 50% off your first box, plus Free Breakfast for 1 Year. Today’s episode of Damn Internet, You Scary! gets absolutely UNHINGED. WeezyWTF (Decisions Decisions and WTF Media) and comedian Akeem Woods pull up with some of the wildest stories we’ve ever heard — from U-Haul threesomes to fake pregnancies to escape work, micro-penis escapes, getting robbed DURING sex, gay hookup apps, down-low drama, invoice scams, and why straight men are “too easy.” Plus we break down the guy who scammed Google & Facebook out of $122 million, billionaire ethics, Teslas, braces, and parenting Black kids in 2024. This episode is pure chaos. You’ve been warned. 🔥 TODAY’S GUESTS Weezy WTF • IG: @WeezyWTF Akeem Woods • IG: @AkeemWoods • Tour Dates: AkeemWoods.com ⏱ CHAPTERS 00:00 – Intro & Guest Introductions 01:28 – Icebreakers & The Funniest Lies Ever Told 05:08 – Weezy’s Fake Pregnancy to Skip Work 06:46 – Akeem’s Micro-Penis Escape Story 10:33 – What “Top” Really Means (Gay Terminology 101) 11:10 – The U-Haul Threesome Story 14:30 – Period Sex Prep, Braces & Oral Sex Disasters 19:48 – Getting Braces Removed Just to Suck D*** 22:12 – Teaching, Sexting Moms & Wild Parent Stories 27:12 – Dick Is Easy to Get? The Ease of Straight Men 31:14 – Weezy’s Story of Getting Robbed DURING Sex 36:55 – Down-Low Men & Post-Nut Clarity Fights 41:44 – Google & Facebook Scammed for $122 Million 47:11 – Weezy’s Employee Who Tried to Scam Her 53:35 – Are Billionaires Automatically Bad People? 1:05:05 – Raising Black Kids & The Reality of Work 1:08:27 – Final Topics + Guest Plugs Join our Patreon now!!  https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary 👍 LIKE the video — it helps us more than you know 🔔 SUBSCRIBE for weekly crazy stories 💬 COMMENT the wildest lie YOU ever told 🎧 LISTEN to the DIYS podcast everywhere podcasts stream 📸 FOLLOW us on IG @DamInternetYouScary

💎 Sponsors GLD — New customers get 50% Off with code DIYS at https://www.GLD.com make sure to tell them DIYS sent you! BlueChew — First month FREE  ➡️ https://www.bluechew.com PROMO CODE: DIYS BetterHelp — Get 10% off your first month ➡️ https://www.betterhelp.com/diys Cash App — Download Cash App Today: https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/crftch8p #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. Welcome back to another chaotic episode of Dam Internet, You Scary! We talk about the Batman husband who got divorced for thinking he’s Bruce Wayne, the “All Coochies Matter” airline guy, FIVE recent Disney World deaths, Lake Lanier ghosts, The Bunny Man ax legend, gaming assassins, and why grown adults still hide sugar from roaches. 🔥 Connect With the Crew Tahir Moore @tahirmoore Patrick Cloud @patrickcloudchannel Guests: Tyler Chronicles @TylerChronicles @Perfect10Guys Jasmyn Carter @_Jasmyn Nick Banks @MrBankshot Mel Mithcell @ItsMelMitch ✔️ LIKE the video ✔️ COMMENT your favorite wild moment ✔️ SUBSCRIBE so you never miss an episode ✔️ TURN ON notifications ✔️ SHARE this episode with a friend who loves chaotic comedy 0:00 | Cold Open Chaos 0:20 | Restarting the Intro… Again 0:54 | Official DIYS Intro + Guest Roll Call 1:19 | Roast Session + Energy Check 1:37 | Bidets & Booty Cleaning Methods Debate 3:04 | “Are You One of These?!” — The Pose Conversation 4:06 | The Captain Morgan Booty Talk 5:18 | The Mechanic Table Position 😭 6:05 | “Women Are Nasty Too” Debate 7:12 | Dorm Horror Stories 8:17 | Ice Breakers That Weren’t Needed 9:14 | Topic #1 — The Batman Husband Divorce Story 10:20 | Is Batman an Identity? 11:02 | When Superheroes Are a Red Flag 12:24 | Fake Crime Fighting & Cosplay Delusion 16:33 | The Justin Bieber / Beaver Moment 😂 17:34 | “Nigga Bird” & The Broke Superhero Rant 18:57 | Topic #2 — The All Coochies Matter Frontier Airline Story 20:11 | Airline Rules + “Dress Better for Flights” Debate 22:10 | Standing vs Sitting Airplane Seats 23:12 | Tony Hawk, X-Games & Nostalgia 23:52 | Twitch Chat Ignoring Accusations 26:49 | The Secret Porn Twitter Handles 😭 34:20 | Topic #3 — 5 Deaths at Disney World in One Month 37:02 | Disney Park History, Club 33 & Hidden Tunnels 39:05 | Theme Park Heat, Thrills & Universal vs Disney 41:45 | Topic #4 — Father Hires Gamers to Kill Son’s Characters 42:17 | Kid Game Addiction & Consequences 44:47 | Topic #5 — Traditions from Childhood 45:47 | Roach Trauma & Sugar in the Fridge Stories 47:12 | Critters, Frogs, Roaches & Florida Life 52:57 | Topic #6 — Sweden Ran Out of Trash?! 55:30 | Why Trash Smells the Way It Does 57:11 | Pixar Movie “Periods Are Scary?” Debate 58:25 | Topic #7 — Bunny Man Urban Legend (Virginia) 1:04:17 | Lake Lanier: The Lady in Blue Story 1:07:57 | Closing: Guest Promos + Tour Dates 1:11:11 | Sign-Off Join our Patreon now!!  https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary

PrizePicks – Visit https://prizepicks.onelink.me/LME0/DIYS and use code DIYS and get $50 in lineups when you play your first $5 lineup! IndaCloud – If you’re 21 or older, get 40% OFF your first order + free shipping @IndaCloud with code [DIYS] at https://inda.shop/[DIYS]! #indacloudpod Miracle Made – Upgrade your sleep with Miracle Made! Go to https://trymiracle.com/DIYS and use the code DIYS to claim your FREE 3 PIECE TOWEL SET and SAVE over 40% OFF This Thanksgiving episode of Dam Internet, You Scary! is pure chaos—from unserious conspiracy theories to Pat’s crazy Japan trip, a kid calling a woman “Miss Piggy” on a plane, insane Butterball hotline calls, lost underwater cities, family recipes, Bigfoot, and Tyler’s new show announcement. 👍 Like if you laughed. 💬 Comment your favorite ridiculous conspiracy theory. 🔔 Subscribe for weekly DIYS chaos. 🎧 Listen on Apple & Spotify Join our Patreon now!! https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary Tahir Moore –  @tahirmoore Patrick Cloud – @PatrickCloudChannel Corey Bell –  @CorreyBell Tyler Chronicles –  @Tylerchronicles  @Perfect10Guys Hippie -  @HippieGoals   0:00 | Quarter-Zip Chaos & YN Behavior Shift 0:21 | Nike Techs Are Out, Quarter-Zips Are In 1:04 | Matcha, Baggy Pants & Culture Shift 2:07 | Nike Tech Debate + Classics 2:28 | Welcome to DIYS – Thanksgiving Episode 2:51 | Introducing Corey Bell & Tyler Chronicles 4:45 | Flat-Auntie Club Explained 5:30 | How Hands Reveal Age 6:13 | Tyler’s Mic Troubles 7:06 | Block Shooting + Tyler’s New Show Announcement 8:20 | Icebreakers Begin 8:38 | Pat’s Japan Trip Recap 10:53 | Building a Custom Game Boy in Japan 12:00 | Japan Drink Prices & Adventures 13:16 | First Icebreaker: Unserious Conspiracy Theories 14:22 | Sprite, Grape Soda & Sickle Cell?? 17:15 | Lost Cities Underwater: Theories Get Wild 19:10 | Venice & Florida Sinking 20:24 | Bigfoot, Aliens & Earth as a Zoo 23:11 | Pigeons = Hood Animals?! 25:10 | Unexpected Celebrity Crushes 26:29 | Martha Stewart in Her Era 28:17 | Judge Judy Thirst Is Wild 30:12 | Little People Hands Debate 31:02 | Hilary Duff Discussion 32:57 | Jimmy Kimmel Crush 33:58 | PrizePicks Ad Segment 36:05 | Football Picks by Uniform Color 37:57 | Butterball Hotline Insane Calls 39:07 | Chihuahua in the Turkey?! 40:15 | Black Thanksgiving vs White Thanksgiving Differences 41:12 | Do We Lose Family Traditions? 42:13 | Family Recipes We Miss 44:10 | Bread Pudding, Rice Pudding, Peas & Chicken 45:14 | Tahir Never Ate Seafood Until 29 47:19 | Why Black Prom = Red Lobster 49:17 | “Miss Piggy” Kid Gets Woman Arrested on Flight 51:25 | In The Cloud Ad Read 53:40 | Corey Bell Returns 55:06 | $1.5M House Built on The WRONG Lot! 56:49 | The Louvre Password Was… “LOUVRE”? 1:00:01 | Sneaking Into Events 101 1:03:12 | Miracle Made Sheets Ad Segment 1:07:08 | Hygienically vs Hygienic Debate 1:09:00 | Final Plugs & Tour Announcements

📢 SPONSORS BlueChew Get your first month FREE — just pay $5 shipping. Use code DIYS at checkout. https://www.bluechew.com BetterHelp 10% off your first month of therapy at https://www.BetterHelp.com/DIYS Kikoff (Credit Builder) ● Build credit fast and get your first month for just a dollar at getkikoff.com/DIYS today. Thanks to Kikoff for sponsoring us! Live Better Longer with BUBS Naturals. For A limited time get 20% Off your entire order with code [DIYS] at https://www.Bubsnaturals.com On this episode of Dam Internet, You Scary! Pat just got back from Japan, a diver risked death for the deepest descent in history, a U.S. Army doctor RETURNS AN ARM 50 years later, and somehow we ended up talking about dragon-faces, nuclear subs, and the Book of Secrets presidents hide from us. Buckle up. 🔥 TODAY’S STORIES Japan’s “no eating while walking” rule Deepest dive ever & why ascent takes 13 hours Sunfish: the dumbest survivor in the ocean Actor who was secretly a real Triad boss The doctor who kept someone’s ARM Woman with rare disorder who sees everyone as dragons U.S. nuclear subs lost under the ocean Why humans keep risking their lives for stunts Presidents, racism, religion & chaos Survival meal after 21 days alone And of course — the wildest DIYS tangents 👉 Subscribe — We’re dropping new DIYS episodes weekly 👉 Comment your favorite story from today 👉 Share the show with a friend who needs a laugh 👉 Join the Scary Squad by hitting that notification bell Join our Patreon now!!  https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary 00:00 — Ambrosia Salad & Japan Trip Warm-Up 00:24 — No Eating While Walking in Japan?! Culture Shock 02:19 — Airport Sandwich Horror Story 03:37 — One Word Challenge: “Sorry” vs “Nigga” 08:17 — What Food Describes Your Personality? 12:00 — Porn Search Filters Get TOO Specific 15:16 — BlueChew Ad Read + Chaos 17:15 — Deepest Dive Ever (Death, Pressure & Why It’s Terrifying) 20:09 — The Useless Sunfish (Nature’s Dumbest Survivor) 22:09 — Why Humans Keep Doing Dangerous Stuff 24:44 — Survival Show: First Meal After 21 Days 26:44 — Actor Turned Real-Life Triad Boss?! 34:24 — The Arm Returned 50 Years Later (Insane Story) 40:00 — War Trauma, Therapy & Mental Health (BetterHelp) 46:17 — BetterHelp Ad Read 50:01 — Woman Sees Everyone as Dragons?! Rare Brain Disorder 52:44 — Do Dragons Actually Exist? 54:22 — Race, Nationality & Travel Realities 56:49 — Kickoff Credit Builder Ad Read 01:00:22 — Titanic Mission Was a Cover-Up?! Lost Nuclear Subs 01:03:45 — Nuclear Submarines Are Scarier Than You Think 01:05:36 — Obama, Presidents & The Book of Secrets 01:07:36 — Show Wrap-Up + Pat & Tahir Announcements

🍽️ FACTOR Get 50% off + FREE breakfast for a year! Go to https://factormeals.com/DIYS50off and use code DIYs50off 💨 INDACLOUD If you’re 21 or older, get 40% OFF your first order + free shipping @IndaCloud with code [DIYS] at https://inda.shop/DIYS #indacloudpod 💎 GLD New customers get 50% Off AND a FREE chain with code DIYS at https://www.GLD.com 💳 CASH APP New customers earn $10 with code SECURE10 when sending $5 to a friend. Terms apply. Download Cash App Today:  https://capl.onelink.me/vFut/crftch8p #CashAppPod. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. See terms and conditions at https://cash.app/legal/us/en-us/card-agreement. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit http://cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures. This week on Dam Internet, You Scary!, Tahir is joined by comedian, actor, writer, and content creator  ⁨@MrJayWashington⁩  this episode… man. It starts wild and somehow gets wilder. We cover everything from Instagram ruining society, Pizza Hut nostalgia, knighted penguins, dolphins with boundary issues, a man who sleeps 300 days a year, a nurse who “lightened his workload” the worst way possible, porn logic, relationship hypotheticals, and the most unhinged analogies you’ll hear all week. Join our Patreon now!!  https://www.patreon.com/DamInternetYouScary 0:00 – Welcome Back + Immediate Chaos 0:51 – Freeballing & Bathroom Podcasting 4:27 – Career Blessings & Christmas Movie 5:05 – Christmas Porn Joke Derailment 6:01 – “Stop One Invention?” → Instagram 8:25 – Food Reviewers & Shucking/Jiving Talk 9:04 – Terry Crews / Fitness Joke 10:33 – Black vs White Porn Titles 10:56 – MAS*H “Spear Chucker Jones” Discovery 12:04 – FACTOR Ad Read 15:20 – Bruce/Caitlyn Transition Joke 16:34 – Instagram’s Evolution to Insanity 18:23 – Twerking Distractions & Discipline 19:27 – Twitter Porn Algorithms 20:35 – Pizza Hut Nostalgia 23:13 – Beaded Curtain Video Store Era 24:05 – Porn Names & Credit Roll Joke 25:26 – Storyline Porn Rant 25:47 – POV Porn… with a Condom 26:16 – “Realistic Porn” Requirements 28:29 – Meta Glasses VR Porn Debate 30:23 – Knighted Penguin Story 31:52 – Brigadier Penguin Explained 32:22 – Dolphins Are Menaces 33:13 – Dolphin Brain Visual 34:01 – Woman in Love with Dolphin Story 35:21 – Woman Who Married a Ferris Wheel 36:29 – IN THE CLOUD Ad Read 39:57 – God Talking at 3AM 40:57 – Negotiating With Noah for Ark Admission 42:22 – Hollywood: Talent vs Value 43:43 – Sugar Baby Logic 45:09 – Sugar Mama Age Limit (83) 46:13 – Slavery Draft Pick Bit 47:18 – German Nurse Who Killed 10 Patients 50:10 – “Lightening the Workload” Breakdown 51:12 – Nursing Home Bed Turnover Reality 53:22 – Uncle Remus vs Harold’s (Chicago Debate) 54:08 – GLD Ad Read 58:42 – Jesus, Mary, Joseph & Theories 1:00:02 – Did Joseph Smash? + Jesus’ Brother James 1:01:18 – Superhead vs Mary Magdalene 1:03:09 – Trailer Park Fight League 1:04:13 – Man Who Sleeps 300 Days a Year 1:05:35 – Could You Care for Someone Like That? 1:06:19 – Partner With No Limbs Hypothetical 1:07:09 – Airline Carry-On Problem 1:08:18 – Box, Packing Peanuts, iPad Playlist 1:09:36 – Playlist for Limbless Bae 1:10:29 – CASH APP Ad Read 1:11:45 – AI Version of Tahir 1:12:20 – Losing Voice & Voice Filters 1:13:14 – Bigfoot Joke + Kids Don’t Watch Dad 1:14:15 – Reverse Cowgirl… Solo Edition 1:15:19 – Dry Jacking vs Lotion Debate 1:16:11 – Jacking Off Using Imagination?! 1:17:05 – Porn Volume vs Neighbors 1:18:32 – Interracial Line Joke 1:18:52 – Hippie’s Editing Hell 1:19:17 – Jay’s Outro + Links