The Thought Spot

In today's episode I do a deep dive into some autistic traits and how that can look and operate within abusive relationship dynamics. Like I said many times in the video, I am not diagnosing Sarma whatsoever but just using some autistic traits I see in her as a jumping off point for this very nuanced conversation. Anyone can find themselves a victim of an abuser--the purpose of this video isn't to promote the idea that there are things you need to do to avoid them, but to simply highlight some dynamics and traits within yourself so that you can identify more quickly and clearly what abuse can look like and how that affects you so that you can do what you need to do to get help or get out.   Take care of yourselves you guys, you truly deserve it. I hope today's video helps validate some of your experiences and maybe even help you learn something new.🧡 ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@irene_selfemb... 🌿 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/self_embark/🍊 Self Empowerment Coach: https://selfembark.com

So many people fight tooth and nail over finally being able to get that formal diagnosis in order to learn more about ourselves, validate our experiences & identity, and to finally seek the help we need. We see a diagnosis as a huge break-through moment. A weight lifted off our shoulders. That light at the end of the tunnel. We see it as liberation--in many ways it is. It can be extremely helpful and validating...sometimes even a luxury, to receive a diagnosis. But this shouldn't take away from the fact that there is a very real mourning process a lot of people go through as well after being diagnosed with Autism. Don't be afraid or ashamed of those feelings of anger, resentment, and grief of your past Self that may come up. Honor those feelings and sit with it. Integrate those lessons with great care. Then pick yourself back up and live your life! 🌱 Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@irene_selfembark?lang=en🌿 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/self_embark/🍊 https://selfembark.com

Hope all of your weeks are going well so far🐢   Today’s episode I dive deep into the topic of camouflaging through fashion/ your appearance. Although this is something that I believe can affect everyone, regardless of Autism—it is something that deeply affects women with Autism. Girls and women statistically get under diagnosed and misdiagnosed due to being socialized and expected to camouflage more, and it is because of this that I find it so important to talk more about it. ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Executive Dysfunction…two words that may not have any meaning to some of you reading this but can deeply impact and derail the lives of others. As I have grown more and more into an independent adult I’ve come to realize the intricate ways we are expected to function and hold our lives together. The system at which we are expected to thrive in can come so naturally to most people, but for those of us who struggle with executive dysfunction, it doesn’t come naturally at all. So depending on how effectively you can pick up on or force yourself into weaving your way through maintaining life, your well-being, and your relationships—can deeply affect your outlook on yourself and how worthy you deem yourself.  I’ve found that as I understand my ND self, ND friends, and ND clients more; that we have spent a lifetime teaching ourselves that getting tasks done, being responsible, and maintaining life can be very painful and even paralyzing. We begin to loathe responsibilities, hate mornings, despise school or work, and as a result we may overindulge ourselves in “unproductive” activities in hopes of soothing ourselves from the immense amount of anxiety we experience due to our executive dysfunction. But as we escape our responsibilities time and time again we not only begin to lose faith in ourselves, but we begin to disassociate our original pure enjoyment in our favorite activities as it is now a means to enabling the very behavior that makes us hate ourselves. As you can see, executive dysfunction is not just a cognitive skill set, it profoundly affects those who struggle with it. It can deepen anxiety and/or depression and it can be truly devastating.  I put a lot of love and awareness into consciously developing the Sandwich Technique in order to help myself with my executive dysfunction. After years of following this technique, I’ve effectively taught myself to detach anxiety and fears away from tasks & taught myself how to manage all of my responsibilities at a steady pace that leads to a significantly lower rate of burnout. Not saying we can avoid burnout completely, but at least you’re keeping it to a minimum. Life can and is maintained and you don’t have to beat yourself bloody in order to do it. Hopefully, as I make this technique accessible to you guys through the weekly digital template I created, it can also help some of you begin to reverse engineer your executive dysfunction as well & will allow some of you to regain some power and hope in your life and in yourself.🐝   🥪SANDWICH TECHNIQUE🥪 https://www.etsy.com/shop/selfembark  ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Warm welcome~  Some of you may or may have not noticed, but I took a two week mental health break to honor my well-being and take extra care of myself while I transitioned into working with a new device. I had not anticipated to feel a bout of depression upon trading in my old laptop, but here we are. I think moments like this is a good reminder to those of us with Autism that changes can be a very difficult time for us. Whether that's people coming in and out of our life, moving, a new schedule, a new set of rules to follow, a new skillset to master, a new haircut, a new blanket, and even a new work device--whatever it may be, bring awareness in the fact that not having someone or something there, that you have grown so accustomed to, can really shake up your world once it's gone. Learning about and how to work with someone or something new  is also very overwhelming. If it takes you some time to readjust, transition, and get used to your new normal, then THAT IS OKAY. Give yourself that time. Honor what you may feel during this transition. If you find yourself feeling a little depressed like I was, then know you're not alone. The feeling of being sad, confused, and maybe even paralyzed will pass. And before you know it, you will have become completely acclimated to this new normal! ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Oftentimes we don't realize that the anxiety we experience may not be a mental or even an emotional anxiety, it can very well just be physical anxiety. So instead of thinking yourself into a relaxed state, you need to implement physical practices to begin grounding yourself. Today I wanted to talk about ways I manage my physical anxiety in the mornings when I take my ADHD medication. A lot of people with ADHD struggle with taking medication because although very helpful, taking stimulants can take a toll on and exacerbate Anxiety. Hopefully some of these methods that have worked for me can help anyone else out there who may struggle with similar experiences. ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

We've all been burnt out at least once in our lives. Where sustaining your lifestyle and/or job becomes genuinely impossible to do and you now have to pay for the repercussions of pushing yourself long past your limit.  On today's episode I wanted to talk about my experiences working multiple people-centered jobs in the past--the benefits of those experiences and also the very real pitfalls of them as well.   ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Hello lovely viewers, I hope all of you are having a smooth week so far. On today's episode I talk a little bit about some of my BFRBs that I have--specifically my hair pulling and my lip biting. I've had this for many years now and have tried so many different behavioral adjustments to try to stop the pulling and biting. All to say, some work better than others and that you can never truly "stop" but only transform how, where, the extent, and how often you partake in these repetitive behaviors. I don't necessarily believe that people should teach themselves to stop their BFRBs but to figure out a way to stim how they want and need to without harming themselves/others. And I think it's totally possible to do so! It just may take time, openness to explore, and the acceptance of yourself & your needs.   With that being said, I wanted to talk about two specific products that has helped me with my hair pulling and lip biting. Although these products don't completely stop the BFRBs it does help! Hopefully it can help some of you out there as well, or at least open you up to trying it out. ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Warm welcome to all of my beautiful neurodivergent & even my allistic viewers❣️ I've been receiving many questions from some of you guys on all of my platforms as to how one can begin their journey on seeking out an assessment for Autism. I know there isn't much information out there, so navigating this journey can be very hard and confusing. I myself had to do hours and hours of obscure research to gather the information I needed--with that being said, I thought it would be useful to condense some of the information I've gathered along the way into one video to help answer some of your questions. I hope this video was helpful in moving you forward in your diagnosis journey. I'm wishing all of you the best of luck. Never give up on yourself, the journey is difficult but you are WORTH IT.🌼 ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

💛💛Hello💛💛 On today's episode of The Thought Spot I wanted to talk about reclaiming your divine FEMININE energy. ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Happy new year everyone🌼 On today's episode of The Thought Spot I talk about 'Scripting'! As a woman with Autism I have had to learn and perfect the skill of Scripting as a masking technique throughout my whole life. It's impacted me greatly in so many different and profound ways as I'm sure it has for many of you as well. Hopefully in time ASD individuals will have a safer & more accepting environment where we do not have to script as much as we need to now. But until then, try to affirm to yourself that you are allowed to let go of those expectations and those projections.💛 ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Welcome to any new viewers and any reoccurring viewers💛 On today's episode of The Thought Spot I reflect on this past year of 2021 and what it means to me. This year has been an amazing year of big shifts, deepening my relationship with myself/ knowing myself, and planting those seeds of intention with persistence and diligence. So much can happen if you took the time out to quiet down & listen. You'll often find that direction life is trying to have you flow into is filled with such deep Purpose that cannot be immediately fathomed at the moment, but pieced together as the years go by. But that's the importance of building trust in yourself and strengthening your intuition.🌼 ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Hello lovely viewers~ On this week's episode of The Thought Spot I get into some of the traits I have as a woman with Autism. The list is long and endless and if it were up to me I could sit here for hours going over all of my autistic traits. But for the sake of keeping these videos as short as I can possibly make them while being mindful through my reflections, I kept the list at a minimum today. But don't be disappointed! I will continue this video in multiple parts in the future, this is just Part One. Thank you for the people who took time out of their day to listen to these episodes, leave thoughtful comments, like the video, subscribe, or even reach out. I appreciate you guys so much🧡 ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Hello lovely viewers, today I read through my report cards from Kindergarten-6th grade to reflect with you guys a lot of the struggles I went through as a child with undiagnosed Autism and ADHD. When I first got my hands on these report cards and read through them, I was totally caught by surprise as to how many clear signs there were that I may have been struggling with something deeper than just "not trying hard enough" or being "mischievous/ misbehaving". I'm upset that none of my teachers were able to have that discussion with my parents, but that's just the unfortunate outcome of Autism+ADHD not being researched & highlighted in the ways it should. I can't help but to think how different my life would have been had I been diagnosed earlier and had the accommodations I needed. A lot of kids who struggle with undiagnosed Autism can sadly go through life feeling as if there's just something perpetually wrong with us. Navigating a ableist and neurotypical world as a neurodivergent is not easy. A lot of the times we learn by failing, and that takes a huge toll on one's self esteem and self worth. It's not a coincidence that a lot of individuals with Autism+ADHD also struggle with anxiety and depression. Hopefully with more awareness being raised with neurodivergency we can begin to accept and make more space for those who may be different.🧡 ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Hello beautiful viewer, in today's video I share a very important milestone in my life--getting diagnosed with Autism! I'm excited to continue learning more about myself and what being autistic means to me, and I'm so lucky to be able to share that journey with you guys.    ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

The surgery results are in! On today's episode I'm going through my Surgeon's findings after my Laparoscopy and Excision surgery. This episode is pretty straight forward so I kept it short & sweet. ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

As the holiday season is among us and we begin to celebrate with our families or in some cases, not celebrate, I think it's worth speaking some words of affirmation to those out there who may struggle with feeling lonely, depressed, and less then for not having a healthy and loving family. Be easy on yourself, stay off the apps, and check in with how you feel & what you need.   Peace & love   Irene  ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Hello Endosisters~ On Today's episode of The Thought Spot I answer some of your questions on my latest Endometriosis Awareness video I posted on my TikTok. Since Endometriosis continues to be understudied both in the general public and within the medical profession, it's so important for Endometriosis Survivors to open up about their journey with this chronic illness to help other women and girls out there who may feel lost & left in the dark, feel less alone with more of a sense of direction + clarity. I know that being able to listen to other women speak about their endometriosis symptoms and how they pursued treatment has not only provided me with a sense of direction with what to do, how to speak about my symptoms, and who to seek help from--but it also provided me with an essential component to the mental & emotional processing of this chronic illness. Cause we all know it is very intense to live with Endometriosis! I hope to continue to share my journey and provide any answers to any women out there who may be lost. Be curious, be discerning, and don't give up!  Peace & love, Irene ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com

Surgery can be scary, but especially when you have no idea how bad your chronic illness and surgery will be. This is the unique experience of pre-surgery nerves many women go through, going into their first Endometriosis surgery. If you're like me, and you had to do all of the researching, self-diagnosing, and intense advocating in order to get your first surgery scheduled--I encourage you to finally take a break from that momentum that got you to this point! I know it's so easy to lose yourself in prepping & planning, but if you've gotten this far, you've more than likely already done all the planning and prepping that is needed. Now it's just about the waiting game & not driving yourself insane in the mean time.  To all the women out there navigating the medical system in regards to their Endometriosis, I genuinely wish you luck and smooth sailing on your journey to a more pain-free life. I'll see you guys on the other side of my surgery! Thank you for watching.   Peace & love, Irene   🩸Period Underwear🩸  thinx.club/thethoughtspot2   ·Connect with me·  🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark  🌿 Instagram: self_embark  🍊 selfembark.com

Living with worsening chronic illness is not for the faint of heart. Especially when the medical realm doesn't make it any easier for women like me, who suffer with Endometriosis, to navigate seeking treatment and diagnosis. I've struggled with the chronic illness and chronic pain my whole life, yet I am only now getting the diagnosis and treatment I need for it at the age of 25 almost 26. And what's even more disheartening is....I am one of the lucky ones. 25 is considered a pretty young age for being diagnosed and receiving surgery for Endometriosis. Too often, women with this chronic illness will go their whole lives suffering in silence with no glimmer of hope, knowledge, or guidance in sight. This is absolutely unacceptable. Even though I finally got to the point of getting my Laparoscopy & Excision surgery scheduled with an Endometriosis specialist, it took me 2 years of actively pursuing this exact result to finally get to this point. And by the tie I found myself with a treatment plan, I was already broken down and gaslit into hopeless defeat.  Should I be surprised that I've faced very similar experiences within my mental health journey and getting the diagnosis I need to provide a sense of closure and deeper understanding of myself? Perhaps the answer is no, sadly. I've been talked over, misunderstood, patronized, and misdiagnosed every single time I sought out help from a professional in some capacity. The road to seeking out the diagnosis for my ADHD wasn't easy, but when I finally received the formal diagnosis & began receiving treatment for the ADHD my life drastically changed for the better. Had I not advocated for myself, had a clear understanding of my symptoms, and trusted my intuition--I'd be receiving treatment for a personality disorder that I did not have. And now I am in the beginning stages of the journey into seeking out a formal diagnosis for Adult Autism. As I continue to navigate this aspect of my life, I have a stronger sense of what I may come across in regards to ignorance from medical health professionals & how to navigate that. I will continue to seek out necessary help from those who are qualified to do so, and I will not stop until I receive that answers I need to help me understand myself more deeply. If you are interested in my Endometriosis, ADHD, and Autism journey--subscribe and follow me on my platforms. I will continue to make more content and keep you guys up to date on all of these subjects. Cause god knows we need more information and stories out there. Peace & love, Irene ·Connect with me· 🌱 Tik Tok: irene_selfembark 🌿 Instagram: self_embark 🍊 selfembark.com