The Divorce and Beyond® Podcast with Susan Guthrie, Esq.

Walking into a courtroom for a divorce rarely ends in justice. The most likely outcome is a continuance. People take the day off from work, pay their attorney a good sum of money, and watch the judge kick the can down the road, walking out with nothing resolved. Now picture the opposite: one skilled, neutral person at the helm of the entire divorce, guiding both spouses through the divorce process step by step until every last piece is finished. Susan Guthrie welcomes Paula Lawhon, a certified family law specialist and full-time divorce mediator in northern California who has spent more than two decades helping families reach agreements without turning their lives into a war. Paula started as a litigator and realized in a courthouse hallway that there had to be a better way, then built her entire practice around finding it. She is the author of Effectively Steering the Ship, a new book from the American Bar Association that offers a blueprint for a divorce built around resolution instead of conflict, with one neutral person steering the whole process at a pace that fits your life and no surprises waiting after the papers are signed. This conversation explores what a divorce looks like when it is actually managed well, why so many divorces stall out and cost far more than they should, and the one thing anyone can ask their own mediator for that could change the entire experience. For anyone facing divorce, and the professionals guiding families through it, this one changes what you think is possible. What You'll Hear: Why there is no one-size-fits-all divorce, and how you and your spouse can design mediation to fit your family, your finances, and your timeline. How a case-managing mediator steers the whole ship, guiding you from the first filing all the way to the final judgment and beyond so nobody is ever lost. Why you and your spouse are the only decision-makers in mediation, with no judge, no dictating, and no one telling you what your life should look like. How full disclosure protects you, and why, when in doubt, it is better to over-disclose. Why you are not done when you sign the papers, since retirement transfers, title changes, and settlement payments are where good divorces quietly fall apart. How to ask your mediator for more, including the next steps, the action items, and the "you are here" dot on the map. Get this week's FREE RESOURCE: The First-Meeting Mediation Guide: 10 Questions That Put You at the Helm can be found on the website at https://divorceandbeyondpod.com/latest-episode About this week's special guest: Paula Lawhon Paula Lawhon is a Certified Family Law Specialist and a full-time divorce mediator based in Northern California, where she has spent more than two decades helping families reach agreements without turning their lives into a war. She started as a litigator, realized somewhere in a courthouse hallway that there had to be a better way, and built her entire practice around finding it. She is a member of the Association of Professional Family Mediators, she has served as a settlement mediator for her county's Superior Court, and she is the author of a brand new book from the American Bar Association called Effectively Steering the Ship CONNECT WITH PAULA LAWHON: Effectively Steering the Ship: https://www.americanbar.org/products/inv/book/455546260/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sfmediation/ Paula's law practice: Lawhon Law & Mediation P.C.: https://www.lawhonlaw.com/   If This Episode Helped You Follow Divorce & Beyond so you never miss an episode. Share it with someone who needs clear, reliable guidance right now. And if you have a moment, a five-star review makes a real difference in helping the show reach the people who need it most. Follow Divorce & Beyond Website: divorceandbeyondpod.com Instagram: instagram.com/divorceandbeyondpod About the Host: Susan Guthrie, Esq. Susan Guthrie is one of the nation's leading family law and mediation attorneys, with more than 35 years of experience helping people navigate divorce with clarity and strategy. She is a Past Chair of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution, a best-selling author, and a sought-after speaker and trainer. Susan recently appeared as the featured expert on The Oprah Podcast and has contributed to The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Town & Country, The Washington Post, NewsNation, and NBC Chicago Today, among others. As the creator and host of Divorce & Beyond, ranked in the top 1% of all podcasts worldwide with more than 1.3 million downloads and an Apple Top 100 Self-Help designation, Susan brings together leading legal and mental health experts to help listeners move through divorce and into what comes next. Learn more at divorceandbeyondpod.com/about.   Disclaimer: The commentary and opinions shared on this podcast are for informational and entertainment purposes only and do not constitute legal advice. Consult a licensed attorney in your state regarding your specific situation.

What would you say if I told you there is a way to choose the judge for your divorce, and skip the courtroom, entirely? The answer might surprise you. It's arbitration. In almost six years of Divorce and Beyond, arbitration has never been part of the conversation, until now. Susan Guthrie welcomes family law attorney Amanda Mason, co-founder and CEO of Solagree, a virtual flat-fee divorce process that puts expert financial and parenting guidance and mediation first, with private arbitration as the backdrop, so nobody gets stuck and nobody ends up in court. Amanda built Solagree after going through her own divorce, including a full custody trial in the same courthouse where she had practiced for years. She knows the system from both sides of the counsel table and has decided families deserve something better. This conversation explores why delay and fear fuel conflict, why functioning is not the same as healing, and how closing the exits keeps both spouses committed to reaching resolution. For anyone going through a divorce, and the professionals helping families restructure through it, this one changes what you think your options are. Together, Susan and Amanda break down how arbitration cuts the delay that fuels conflict, why it is not litigation light, and how agreeing up front that an arbitrator will decide whatever you can't settle closes the exits so no one can walk away or drag it out forever. For anyone going through a divorce, and the professionals helping families restructure through it, this one changes what you think your options are. What You'll Hear: How arbitration lets you and your spouse choose a decision-maker with deep family law experience, even for their reputation for kindness, instead of whichever judge is assigned to your case. Why delay creates conflict, with every month waiting for a court date adding paperwork updates, professional fees, and distrust. How fear stops people from settling, and why starting with financial and parenting specialists before anyone negotiates makes settlement stop feeling impossible. Why this is not litigation light, keeping every tool from expert witnesses to appraisals while giving up the backlog, the formality, and the courtroom. About this week's special guest: Amanda Mason Amanda Mason is a family law attorney, certified mediator, and the co-founder and CEO of SOLAGREE®, a virtual, flat-fee divorce process built to keep families out of court. Admitted to the North Carolina bar in 2003, Amanda has spent more than two decades in family law and is a partner at Mason, Mason & Smith in Wilmington, North Carolina. She is certified by the North Carolina Dispute Resolution Commission as both a Family Financial and a Superior Court Civil mediator, and she has been named to the North Carolina Super Lawyers list for 2025, 2026, and 2027, after appearing on the Rising Stars list from 2015 to 2018. Her work on SOLAGREE began with her own divorce. Amanda went through a full custody trial in the same courthouse where she had practiced for years, and standing on the other side of the counsel table changed how she saw the system. In 2019 she began building an alternative: a structured process where couples agree at the outset that private arbitration, not a courtroom, will decide anything they cannot settle themselves. That single commitment removes the two things that derail most divorces, one spouse walking away and one spouse dragging it out. SOLAGREE® is a virtual, flat-fee divorce process that replaces the courtroom with a private, structured path to resolution. It works in three phases. In the first, a certified divorce financial analyst and a parenting specialist help each person understand their financial picture and define their parenting goals, without the usual discovery slog. In the second, an experienced family law mediator guides the negotiation, where most cases resolve. In the third, if anything is still unresolved, a private arbitrator the couple helps select issues a binding decision. What sets it apart is the commitment at the front end. Both people agree from the start that arbitration, not court, will decide whatever they cannot settle. Amanda calls it a closed system, and it is why nobody can walk away and nobody can stall. A set of standard ground rules, including what she calls her anti-ghosting provisions, keeps both parties participating. Pricing is flat and published up front, by track: Parenting at $2,250 per person, Financial at $4,800 per person, and Combined at $5,990 per person, including the neutral experts, the mediation, the arbitration, and the final award. The entire process runs online. Attorneys are welcome and optional, and SOLAGREE is expanding state by state toward nationwide availability. CONNECT WITH AMANDA MASON AND SOLAGREE® Website: solagree.com Take the eligibility quiz: solagree.com Book a consultation: solagree.com/book-a-solagree-consult Email Amanda: [email protected] Instagram: @solagree_divorce Amanda on Instagram: @amandamasonatty Facebook: facebook.com/Solagree LinkedIn: linkedin.com/company/solagree Amanda on LinkedIn: Amanda Mason Amanda's law practice: Mason, Mason & Smith, Wilmington, NC, masonmasonlaw.com   If This Episode Helped You Follow Divorce & Beyond so you never miss an episode. Share it with someone who needs clear, reliable guidance right now. And if you have a moment, a five-star review makes a real difference in helping the show reach the people who need it most. Follow Divorce & Beyond Website: divorceandbeyondpod.com Instagram: instagram.com/divorceandbeyondpod About the Host: Susan Guthrie, Esq. Susan Guthrie is one of the nation's leading family law and mediation attorneys, with more than 35 years of experience helping people navigate divorce with clarity and strategy. She is a Past Chair of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution, a best-selling author, and a sought-after speaker and trainer. Susan recently appeared as the featured expert on The Oprah Podcast and has been cited in The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Town & Country, The Washington Post, NewsNation, and NBC Chicago Today, among others. As the creator and host of Divorce & Beyond, ranked in the top 1% of all podcasts worldwide with more than 1.3 million downloads and an Apple Top 100 Self-Help designation, Susan brings together leading legal and mental health experts to help listeners move through divorce and into what comes next. Learn more at divorceandbeyondpod.com/about.   Disclaimer: The commentary and opinions shared on this podcast are for informational and entertainment purposes only and do not constitute legal advice. Consult a licensed attorney in your state regarding your specific situation.

The end of a marriage does not mean the end of who you are. It can be the blank canvas that opens the door to becoming the person you were always meant to be, and there is no better place to close out a season than in that joyful, wide-open work of reinvention. Susan Guthrie welcomes back stylist, dating expert, and author Alyssa Dineen, who rebuilt her own life after divorce and now helps others do the same from the outside in. This conversation, one of the most loved in the show's archive, breaks down what she calls "divorce as the mother of reinvention." From the closet cleanse that clears out clothes that no longer feel like home, to practicing self-kindness in the small moments, to getting real about online dating profiles and photos, this episode is a guide for reinventing yourself from the inside out. What You'll Hear: Why a closet cleanse after divorce can feel like purging an old identity, and how choosing a few new pieces that feel like "the new you" builds confidence How small acts of self-kindness, like sleeping in or journaling nightly gratitude, help you appreciate the "benchmark moments" of starting over The "first date uniform" and why having a go-to outfit takes the stress out of getting ready to date again How to take profile photos that feel natural instead of staged How "shopping your closet" and restyling what you already own can create a whole new look without a big budget Episode 8 of 8 in the Divorce & Beyond Summer Essentials Series. This summer, Divorce & Beyond brought back 8 episodes listeners reach for most, the conversations with the clearest, most practical guidance for anyone thinking about, going through, or rebuilding after divorce. We've made it to the final episode! Follow the show to catch up on all of the episodes and stay tuned for new episodes to come.  About this week's special guest: Alyssa Dineen Hi! I’m Alyssa Dineen and I’m a personal stylist and dating coach all rolled into one. I started Style My Profile to help other online daters feel better about getting out there— and staying out there— in the world of online dating. Whether it’s to meet your soulmate, to find a fun person to have dinner with or even just match with more people, I can help you from the ground up. From making the decision about whether you’re actually ready to online date, to finding your true-to-you style for your profile photos and IRL dates, to what to include in your profile, to actually asking someone out.  With my 20 years of styling expertise, my art director eye, my new book, The Art of Online Dating, and my own personal dating experience, I am able to coach online daters successfully through the foreign world of dating apps. Find More Information on Alyssa Dineen: Website http://www.stylemyprofilenyc.com Book:  The Art of Online Dating Instagram: http://instagram.com/stylemyprofilenyc  and http://instagram.com/alyssadineen If This Episode Helped You Follow Divorce & Beyond so you never miss an episode. Share it with someone who needs clear, reliable guidance right now. And if you have a moment, a five-star review makes a real difference in helping the show reach the people who need it most. Follow Divorce & Beyond Website: divorceandbeyondpod.com Instagram: instagram.com/divorceandbeyondpod About the Host: Susan Guthrie, Esq. Susan Guthrie is one of the nation's leading family law and mediation attorneys, with more than 35 years of experience helping people navigate divorce with clarity and strategy. She is a Past Chair of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution, a best-selling author, and a sought-after speaker and trainer. Susan recently appeared as the featured expert on The Oprah Podcast and has been cited in The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Town & Country, The Washington Post, NewsNation, and NBC Chicago Today, among others. As the creator and host of Divorce & Beyond, ranked in the top 1% of all podcasts worldwide with more than 1.3 million downloads and an Apple Top 100 Self-Help designation, Susan brings together leading legal and mental health experts to help listeners move through divorce and into what comes next. Learn more at divorceandbeyondpod.com/about.   Disclaimer: The commentary and opinions shared on this podcast are for informational and entertainment purposes only and do not constitute legal advice. Consult a licensed attorney in your state regarding your specific situation.

Betrayal is one of the deepest wounds divorce can carry. As part of her summer series on rebuilding after divorce, Susan Guthrie, family law attorney and mediator, turns her attention to healing itself, sitting down with Dr. Debi Silber, founder of the PBT (Post-Betrayal Transformation) Institute. Whether it's a loved one, a friend, a colleague, or someone entirely unexpected, betrayal reaches into nearly every part of life and can be hard to move beyond, sometimes for years. Dr. Silber has spent her career studying exactly that, building a program that guides people through the five stages of betrayal toward a new foundation and a new worldview. Together, she and Susan unpack why betrayal cuts so deep, walking through those stages and the reasons so many people stay stuck in the process without realizing it. As Dr. Silber puts it, "the best revenge is a life well lived." Wherever someone is in their own healing, this conversation offers a clear next step toward it. What You'll Learn Why betrayal is uniquely devastating, striking at the sense of self in ways other traumas don't Why Dr. Silber says that even though betrayal happened to you, it was never really about you The five stages of betrayal and healing, and how to recognize which one you're in The three reasons people get stuck and never fully heal from betrayal Why staying stuck in betrayal can function like an addiction, and what it takes to break the cycle Episode 7 of 8 in the Divorce & Beyond Summer Essentials Series. This summer, Divorce & Beyond brings back 8 the episodes listeners reach for most, the conversations with the clearest, most practical guidance for anyone thinking about, going through, or rebuilding after divorce. New Essentials air every other Monday all summer. Follow the show so you never miss one.  About this week's special guest: Dr. Debi Sibler Dr. Debi Silber, Founder and CEO of The PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute and National Forgiveness Day, is an award-winning speaker and 2-time #1 International bestselling author. Her podcast, From Betrayal to Breakthrough, ranks in the top 1.5% globally. Her groundbreaking PhD study revealed 3 discoveries that completely revolutionized our understanding of betrayal-and how to achieve full healing physically, mentally, and emotionally. Creator of the world's #1 betrayal recovery certification for life, business, health, and leadership coaches, Dr. Debi equips practitioners globally with her evidence-based framework so they can deliver exponentially better results with their existing clients. Featured on FOX, CBS, The Dr. Oz Show, and TEDx (twice), she equips practitioners with the missing framework-helping them move from uncertainty to confidence, from using general tools that keep clients stuck to specialized approaches that create genuine transformation. Find More Information on Dr. Silber: Website: http://thepbtinstitute.com Book: Unstuck: The Practitioner's Guide to Moving Betrayal Clients from Survival to Transformation You can view Dr. Debi's latest TEDx Talk, "Do You Have Post-Betrayal Syndrome?" HERE! If This Episode Helped You Follow Divorce & Beyond so you never miss an episode. Share it with someone who needs clear, reliable guidance right now. And if you have a moment, a five-star review makes a real difference in helping the show reach the people who need it most. Follow Divorce & Beyond Website: divorceandbeyondpod.com Instagram: instagram.com/divorceandbeyondpod About the Host: Susan Guthrie, Esq. Susan Guthrie is one of the nation's leading family law and mediation attorneys, with more than 35 years of experience helping people navigate divorce with clarity and strategy. She is a Past Chair of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution, a best-selling author, and a sought-after speaker and trainer. Susan recently appeared as the featured expert on The Oprah Podcast and has been cited in The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Town & Country, The Washington Post, NewsNation, and NBC Chicago Today, among others. As the creator and host of Divorce & Beyond, ranked in the top 1% of all podcasts worldwide with more than 1.3 million downloads and an Apple Top 100 Self-Help designation, Susan brings together leading legal and mental health experts to help listeners move through divorce and into what comes next. Learn more at divorceandbeyondpod.com/about.   Disclaimer: The commentary and opinions shared on this podcast are for informational and entertainment purposes only and do not constitute legal advice. Consult a licensed attorney in your state regarding your specific situation.

Not every co-parenting relationship can be fixed through better communication. What do you do when the other parent refuses to cooperate, no matter what you try? There's a name for the path forward: parallel parenting. Susan Guthrie welcomes divorce and recovery coach Dr. Courtney Evans, who has lived through high-conflict co-parenting herself and now helps others build the boundaries that get them out of it. This episode continues Divorce & Beyond's summer series, picking up where last week's conversation on uncooperative co-parents left off. Dr. Evans explains what parallel parenting is, when to use it, and how to create real peace for you and your children even when the conflict doesn't stop.  Episode 6 of 8 in the Divorce & Beyond Summer Essentials Series. This summer, Divorce & Beyond brings back 8 the episodes listeners reach for most, the conversations with the clearest, most practical guidance for anyone thinking about, going through, or rebuilding after divorce. New Essentials air every other Monday all summer. Follow the show so you never miss one.   What You'll Learn  Parallel Parenting: a transformative approach that can help you manage high-conflict situations with greater ease and clarity “There is no one solution for how to divorce, co-parent or parallel parent or how to recover after. Every situation is unique.” The difference between counter-parent, co-parent, and parallel parent Why Courtney likes to refer to parallel parenting as peaceful parenting How and when to get started with parallel parenting or make the transition Episode 6 of 8 in the Divorce & Beyond Summer Essentials Series. This summer, Divorce & Beyond brings back 8 the episodes listeners reach for most, the conversations with the clearest, most practical guidance for anyone thinking about, going through, or rebuilding after divorce. New Essentials air every other Monday all summer. Follow the show so you never miss one.  About this week's special guest: Dr. Courtney Evans Dr. Courtney is an experienced divorce and co-parenting coach who also holds a DNP. Her two-decade career in the healthcare field has lent to her deep understanding of mental health and the importance of self-care during challenging life transitions. In 2021, after a traumatic family court journey, she switched gears in her career, determined to turn her experience into a source of healing. She began coursework in Alternate Dispute Resolution strategies. In 2022, Courtney received her Divorce Coach and Recovery Coach certifications from the CDC® International Divorce Coach Certification Program and a specialization in Divorce Conflict from the Divorce Coach Academy®. Courtney is currently in school working on her MBA as well as continued work in co-parenting and high conflict dispute resolution specializations. She is also currently writing her first book, Uncaged: Redefining Forgiveness out January 13, 2025. Find More Information on Dr. Evans: Dr. Courtney’s website: https://drcourtney.me Dr. Courtney on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drcourt_everafterco Dr. Courtney on Facebook: http://facebook.com/drcourt_everafterco Resources mentioned in this episode: The Parallel Parenting Solution (book)  Get Uncaged: The Key to Happily Ever After by Dr. Courtney Evans with a Forward by Susan E. Guthrie   If This Episode Helped You Follow Divorce & Beyond so you never miss an episode. Share it with someone who needs clear, reliable guidance right now. And if you have a moment, a five-star review makes a real difference in helping the show reach the people who need it most. Follow Divorce & Beyond Website: divorceandbeyondpod.com Instagram: instagram.com/divorceandbeyondpod About the Host: Susan Guthrie, Esq. Susan Guthrie is one of the nation's leading family law and mediation attorneys, with more than 35 years of experience helping people navigate divorce with clarity and strategy. She is a Past Chair of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution, a best-selling author, and a sought-after speaker and trainer. Susan recently appeared as the featured expert on The Oprah Podcast and has been cited in The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Town & Country, The Washington Post, NewsNation, and NBC Chicago Today, among others. As the creator and host of Divorce & Beyond, ranked in the top 1% of all podcasts worldwide with more than 1.3 million downloads and an Apple Top 100 Self-Help designation, Susan brings together leading legal and mental health experts to help listeners move through divorce and into what comes next. Learn more at divorceandbeyondpod.com/about.   Disclaimer: The commentary and opinions shared on this podcast are for informational and entertainment purposes only and do not constitute legal advice. Consult a licensed attorney in your state regarding your specific situation.