LIKING the people you LOVE

We all like to be nice. We like to be helpful and supportive. But sometimes, in our efforts to make others happy, we end up taking responsibility for their emotions. Unfortunately, no matter how hard we try, we can't make another person feel happy, or confident, or calm. And sometimes, when we try too hard to be helpful, we end up walking on eggshells and damaging the very relationship we were trying to improve.

One of the most common things that I see sucking the joy out of family relationships is the constant worry and anxiety that we as mothers sometimes carry around. We feel an urgency to make sure our kids are thriving and doing things the right way. It sounds nice, but it's often counterproductive. Today I'm reminding us all about a truth that President Dallin H. Oaks taught in the recent general conference.  

Our kids learn more from who we are than from what we say. This is especially true during the teenage years, when they start to tune our words. Today's episode is about how to teach teenagers skills of emotional resilience, without them even knowing they are being taught!

With the passing of our dear prophet, President Russell M. Nelson, I have been reflecting on the many precious things I have learned from him. While his general conference talks were not specifically issued as "parenting advice," his wise and inspired words have helped me so much in my parenting, and in my family relationships. Today I'm sharing how I have applied his teachings to my parenting, and recognizing how profoundly I have been blessed by following a prophet of God.

Mothers are the heart of the home. Today's episode is about how to be more intentional about the kind of atmosphere or feeling we are creating in our homes.

What if you were wearing smudged lenses, but you didn't realize it?  You would think that the world just looked dirty! Today I'm talking about how the things we believe create our reality.  As we become aware of beliefs that create negative results in our lives, we create more options for ourselves. We can, if we choose, let go of limiting beliefs and choose beliefs that open us up to new possibilities.

The Book of Mormon tells us that we are agents to act, and not just be acted upon. (2 Nephi 2:26-27) But when the people around us are being difficult, sometimes it's hard to take full responsibility for our own agency. We all know that we are responsible for our own actions, but sometimes I think we forget we are also free to choose our thoughts and feelings. Today I have a couple of suggestions for you, to help you get better at acting, instead of just reacting to your circumstances.

Last night I was faced with the question "What was one of the happiest moments of your life?" After mulling that over in my mind for a while, this episode has my answer.

Today I'm sharing a practical tip that helps when our kids are in a stage that we don't love. It's tempting to set rules or consequences that try to change their behavior. But if we jump to that too quickly, we may be missing out on valuable insights and the chance to connect on a deeper level.

Today's conversation is a topic that consumes a lot of my brain space and heart space. It's important to me that I do my best to get the gospel deep into the hearts of my teenagers. My guest is my new-ish friend Rachel Tucker. I consider her wise and faithful, and a someone I always love to learn from. If I were to re-cap, I'd say her main advise is: Live your faith Don't be preachy Wrap them in love There are lots more little nuggets of wisdom in here! I hope this conversation brings helps you to feel uplifted and motivated to keep doing the things that matter.

My son and his wife recently celebrated their one year wedding anniversary. I asked them to each share one thing they have learned in their first year of marriage, and they had some beautiful insights. Today I'm sharing what they have learned, and applying those prinicples to parenting.

The very first thing I address with new clients is the skill of compassionate self-awareness. It is an important foundation if you want to make changes in your life, and the first step in learning to maximize the gift of agency. Tune in to hear some examples of how a little bit of self-awareness changes everything!

I'm all for being prepared. I'm a planner and a think ahead-er. And sometimes, that makes my life easier and better! But sometimes, planning ahead- for things that could go wrong- actually makes life worse. Today we're talking about common scenarios where trying to prepare ourselves for the worst case scenario is not helpful at all. I'll give some real life examples, and provide what I think is a more useful strategy.

Today's episode is short and sweet. I'm sharing how I chose to use the sabbath as a day of rest last week. Because maybe you could use a rest too. Matthew 11:28-30

Today we're talking about the difference between discipline and punishment. One is intended to teach and train, the other is intended to control or to assert power. This episode talks about what our real goal is as parents, and how to use consequences not as punishments, but as genuine opportunities to teach. Click here to schedule a free consultation session. 

Today is the continuation of the last week's episode. We're talking about tips 4 and 5 from my ebook: Parenting Teengaers 101: a Guidebook for Parents. 4. Let Your Teaching Strategies Evolve 5. Be Their Biggest Fan

Today I'm sharing three parenting strategies I wish I had understood better when my oldest child entered the teen years. Don't freak out It's not about you Allow big emotions These "tips" come from years of experience, both parenting my own teens, and coaching parents of teens. You can find these same tips in my short ebook, "Parenting Teenagers 101: a guidebook for parents." Or if you're looking for a little longer read, check out "The Power of a Faithful Mother: parenting in the latter days with a faith-filled mindset."

Today's episode was inspired by President Camille N. Johnson's talk in this last general conference, titled "Spiritually Whole in Him." We're talking about how to feel spiritually whole, even when family relationships are difficult or strained. Quote from Elder Ballard here. Quote from Elder Renlund here. Quote from Elder Gong here.

I know this is not a new idea. I'm sure you pray often for your children. But if you're anything like me, you might be praying for the wrong things sometimes. Today I'm sharing four "prayer strategies" that have made a big difference in my life: Turn it over to the Lord Ask "what would you like me to do?" Seek and Expect Miracles ("Spiritual Momentum" by Russell M. Nelson, April 2022) Call on Angels ("The Ministry of Angels" by Jeffrey R. Holland, October 2008)

My thoughts today are inspired by Elder Patrick Kearon's talk from general conference last year, "God's Intent is to Bring You Home." I'm talking about how to apply his phrase "relentless pursuit" to our parenting in a way that doesn't feel like nagging or controlling.