Flusterclux With Lynn Lyons: For Parents Who Worry

Remember the outdated parenting adage: “do as I say, not as I do”? Well, when it comes to passing on anxiety, both what you say really does make a difference. Research shows that how parents talk about new experiences and social encounters matters. In this episode, we break down the very doable verbal ways to up your child’s social confidence and minimize the impact of your social anxiety. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, Robin and Lynn tackle the topic of siblings. How can parents best balance the significant needs of one child with the needs of other siblings? Be it anxiety, OCD, or medical issues, how are siblings impacted? And how can families interrupt patterns, have direct conversations and, as always, stay out of the powerful cult of anxiety? WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Have you heard of ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder)? It describes extreme “picky eating” and can hijack families. But as with most disorders that seem to move quickly into parenting awareness, information, treatment, and internet discussions are all over the place. In this episode, Lynn brings back her colleague Mindy Szelap for a dose of solid information, myth-busting, and practical steps to take. What’s normal developmentally? What are the do’s and don’ts of mealtime? And does a parent’s anxiety make it worse? Yup. Find Mindy at: https://www.bayareaspacetreatment.com/ WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A listener asks a very relatable question: how do I help my perfectionist daughter manage the overwhelming demands of junior year without being stressed, tired and miserable? What’s the skill we need to teach our high schoolers…and what do messages do we parents need to stop sending? Here's the Season 2 episode referenced in today' s podacst: High Anxiety & Good Grades: Our Toxic Achievement Culture WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Parents are eager if not desperate to find help for their families, and the explosion of coaching options might be appealing. But parent beware: while coaching as a model to support has great legitimacy in some areas (health coaching, for example) many programs that claim to address trauma, OCD, anxiety or parenting struggles offer “certificates” and a business model that are superficial at best. How do parents sort through the options for coaches, advocates, and even therapists to make sure they are getting qualified help? WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Can you tolerate your children being frustrated, disappointed, angry or bored? Do you know how to help your child get through big emotions, or do you work hard to make sure they’re NOT distressed? Parenting to keep your kids “happy” has consequences, so in this episode you’ll get the words and the permission to let your kids feel uncomfortable. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hurray for January as we reset and move forward! In this episode, Lynn and Robin double down on six key anxiety-busting (and preventing) practices that can guide your parenting. If you want smoother days and better moods, listen up! WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Several listeners have asked that we address the tough topic of bullying. We hope this episode will help parents recognize that not all bullies are the same, not all difficult interactions between kids are bullying, and direct conversations about how to step in are critical. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today's episode is a recast of Part 2 of our 2022 series entitled: 7 Essential Anxiety Disruptors For Families. [Listen to last week's episode for a recast of Part 1 and continue with Part 3 here: The 7 Anxiety Disruptors For Families: #3 get uncomfortable on purpose] Externalizing worry (and other strong emotions) teaches children and parents to take a step back and notice HOW worry and other big feelings operate. Changing the response to worry (instead of changing the environment to meet anxiety’s demands) is a powerful skill. Consistency and practice are key, and Lynn talks about how to explain and use externalizing in your family to promote emotional intelligence and management. These skills are relevant for kids and adults. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Whether you’re a loyal listener or new to the podcast, you’ll want to join us for this series on Lynn Lyons’ approach to anxiety. Lynn and Robin talk about the first "puzzle piece" that helps create an anxiety-disrupting strategy for parents and kids. Together, these puzzle pieces are a foundation for a family to shift their anxious patterns. Lynn will explain the steps in order, just as she does in her practice, so that families have the clarity, language and confidence to manage worry. This week we start with “Expect to Worry.” WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Lynn often uses the phrase “doing the disorder” to describe how well-meaning adults often end up aiding anxiety by doing exactly what it needs to remain in charge. In this episode, Ed and Lynn review this common trap, and describe how doing the disorder is also prevalent when dealing with physical symptoms and depression. And here is the 2023 episode Lynn references in today's conversation: Depression's Treatment And Prevention: A Series of Mic Drops with Dr. Michael Yapko WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Lynn is joined by psychologist Dr. Ali Navidi who specializes in the brain gut connection. So many anxious kids have tummy aches and gastrointestinal symptoms. And sometimes an episode of food poisoning or the norovirus can set off an anxious spiral that turns chronic. Lynn and Ali talk about how to interrupt these patterns, their mutual love of pediatric hypnosis, and the myth that progress needs to be made slowly. Visit Ali's website: gipsychology.com WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Just in time for the holidays, we welcome psychologist Dr. Tracy Dalgleish to talk about her new book: You, Your Husband, and His Mother: Create a Healthy Relationship with Your Mother-in-Law--and Your Spouse--in Five Simple Steps. Tracy gives us the keys to handling this tricky dynamic with the goal of connection. And Lynn (whose mother-in-law does not listen to the podcast) has fun role playing. And check out Tracy's podcast: Dear Dr. Tracy WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   We will select two listeners who complete our listener survey. We hope it is you!   FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ed joins Lynn to first laugh (a lot) about their mutual fainting, and then discuss the negatives and positives of using distraction to deal with anxiety. Although distraction is routinely prescribed, Lynn sees what she calls “destructive distraction” as an increasingly common. Can distraction be helpful? And what do parents and clinicians need to know? WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here⁠ For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   WIN A COPY OF THE ANXIETY AUDIT COURSE! We will select two listeners who complete our ⁠⁠listener survey⁠⁠. We hope it is you! FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Parenting “styles” are all the rage. Gentle, eggshell, snowplow, concierge…and more! Robin and Lynn wade into the jargon, the benefits, and—of course—the ridiculous. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here⁠ For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   WIN A COPY OF THE ANXIETY AUDIT COURSE! We will select two listeners who complete our ⁠⁠listener survey⁠⁠. We hope it is you! FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Lynn is big on families knowing how worry and anxiety work. If we’re going to ask kids and parents to take an approach that is the OPPOSITE of what feels comfortable, they need to understand the rationale. But what happens when — despite explaining and externalizing and talking to worry— a child insists it is NOT worry? What are parents to do with explosions and refusal and demands about bedtime or school attendance or separating when their efforts to address the anxiety are met with: “Nope! That’s not what’s happening!” WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here⁠ For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   WIN A COPY OF THE ANXIETY AUDIT COURSE! We will select two listeners who complete our ⁠⁠listener survey⁠⁠. We hope it is you! FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What do you do when your child starts missing too many days of school? In this episode, Lynn and Robin address a mom’s question about her middle schooler who wants to stay home. Does she give consequences? How does she work with the school? What happens when home is more “cozy” or interesting than school? And have expectations around opting out of school changed since the pandemic? (Spoiler alert: yes, they have.) WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here⁠ For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   WIN A COPY OF THE ANXIETY AUDIT COURSE! We will select two listeners who complete our ⁠⁠listener survey⁠⁠. We hope it is you! FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Jean Twenge, a professor of psychology at San Diego University, has been a consistent voice of warning on the impact of smartphones and social media on children and teens. Her latest book, 10 Rules for Raising Kids in a High-Tech World, compiles over a decade of research into solid guidance that she and Lynn walk listeners through. She’s a mom to three teen girls and an all-around delightful person. Find Jean's book here: https://www.jeantwenge.com/10-rules-for-raising-kids-in-a-high-tech-world/ WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here⁠ For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   WIN A COPY OF THE ANXIETY AUDIT COURSE! We will select two listeners who complete our ⁠⁠listener survey⁠⁠. We hope it is you! FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Manners and social skills are important for some basic reasons: we want our children to learn how to move through the world with decency and respect. But in this episode, Robin and Lynn go deeper, talking about manners and etiquette as a potential bridge to kindness and connection. Oh, and there’s some crying. WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here⁠ For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   WIN A COPY OF THE ANXIETY AUDIT COURSE! We will select two listeners who complete our ⁠⁠listener survey⁠⁠. We hope it is you! FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sam and Vincent are struggling with the rigidity and bossiness of their six-year-old daughter, Jody. They’ve made great strides with her separation anxiety, but during playdates (and many other times, as well) Jody needs things to go her way. Mom’s discomfort with Jody’s distress and Dad’s similar temperament are targets we need to address! WE'VE MADE PLAYLISTS OF OUR EPISODES TO HELP YOU FIND RESOURCES ON SPECIFIC TOPICS. Here is our first: Parents of Anxious Kids, Start Here⁠ For those brand new to the podcast, we suggest starting with this playlist featuring Lynn Lyons and the 7-part anxiety disruptor series as well as a 3-part series on the skills most helpful in managing anxious kids: flexibility, problem solving, and autonomy. Consult our Spotify profile for the most up-to-date selection.   WIN A COPY OF THE ANXIETY AUDIT COURSE! We will select two listeners who complete our ⁠⁠listener survey⁠⁠. We hope it is you! FOLLOW US Join the Facebook group to get news on the upcoming courses for parents, teens, and kids. Follow Flusterclux on Facebook and Instagram. Follow Lynn Lyons on Twitter and Youtube. VISIT OUR SPONSORS FOR SPECIAL OFFERS JUST FOR YOU: Go to Quince.com/fluster for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order! Right now, our listeners get at least an additional 15% off any annual membership at MASTER CLASS.com/FLUSTER . Head to lumen.me/FLUSTERCLUX for 15% off your purchase. Visit Carawayhome.com/FLUSTER and you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices