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If you're riddled with mom guilt, your temper scares you, you're terrified you're screwing up your kids and are afraid to admit any of those things out loud....this podcast is for you. Hosted by Danielle Bettmann, parenting coach for families with 1-10-year-old strong-willed kids, Failing Motherhood is where shame-free vulnerability meets breakthroughs.
Every other week is a storytelling interview about one mom's raw and honest experience of growth that leads to new perspectives and practical strategies and every other week solo episodes focus on actionable insight into parenting your deeply feeling, highly sensitive, *spicy* child.
Here, we normalize the struggle, share openly about our insecurities, and rally around small wins and truths. We hope to convince you you're not alone and YOU are the parent your kids need. We hope you see yourself, hear your story, and find hope and healing.
Welcome to Failing Motherhood. You belong here!
200 Episodes
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Happy 5th Anniversary of Failing Motherhood! Welcome to the LAST episode, #200. If there's one thing I will be known for, let it be this mindset shift. And in this episode, I don't just explain it, but I share a clip from a coaching call where we apply it in real time to a common frustration. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: How to recognize when you're having "first thoughts"Creative ways to problem solve struggles with cleaning up their own thingsHow to take your power back + no longer feel like t...
Not giving up. Not giving in. Not settling. Being all in. Today's episode recounts the story of Abbey, Jake, and their 7-year-old son finding purpose rather than despair, leaning in, offering mutual respect, and feeling like a united front. From feeling desperate and helpless, having "no good days" to parenting authentically, strategically, enjoying time together again. From their son never doing something he doesn't want to do, to not saying no anymore. From considering divorce, to the...
We have a returning guest today! KC Davis is a Licensed Professional Counselor, author, speaker, the creator of the mental health platform, Struggle Care, AND the author of the brand new book, out today... Who Deserves your Love (How to Create Boundaries to Start, Strengthen, or End any Relationship). In our conversation, we discuss the problems within the traditional self-help industry and the parallels of mom guilt and our effect on the people and the relationships we love. The...
Welcome back! This is the 3rd of 3 episodes breaking down the vast array of parenting resources we have at our fingertips. Today we’re talking: personal therapy, marriage counseling, one-off or 1:1 parenting coaching, and virtual parenting programs / memberships. For each, I break down the family that resource is BEST for, the benefits it provides, the unique Pros and Cons of utilizing that support vs. another, and ultimately, for some, the way they fall short. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED...
Welcome back! This is the 2nd of 3 episodes breaking down the vast array of parenting resources we have at our fingertips. Today we’re talking: Occupational Therapy, Parent Child Interaction Therapy, Child Therapy (play therapy) and seeing a Psychologist. For each, I break down the family that resource is BEST for, the benefits it provides, the unique Pros and Cons of utilizing that support vs. another, and ultimately for some, the way they fall short. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: When pl...
Welcome to my VERSUS series! This is the 1st of 3 episodes breaking down the vast array of parenting resources we have at our fingertips. Today we’re talking: parenting content, parenting courses & books, and in-person parenting classes. For each, I break down the family that resource is BEST for, the benefits it provides, the unique Pros and Cons of utilizing that support vs. another, and ultimately for some, the way they fall short. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: Why it’s extra hard t...
What does it even look like to set + hold good boundaries? Boundaries can feel like an illusive mystery. Our preconceived notions of what we should be doing can create really rigid metrics for succeeding or failing, when in all actuality, there’s often no right or wrong! Today’s discussion includes validating the intention to “find the line”, why boundaries isn’t a binary but rather a spectrum, and the mindset reframes needed to be more effective and successful while still allowing for except...
Well that backfired! When we parent out of fear, our short-sighted reactions can add fuel to the fire. This can create unintended consequences, like MORE helplessness, MORE sibling resentment, and MORE attention-seeking. In this episode, I cover where this starts, two extremely common examples, and what to do instead. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: The Boomerang Effect: What you push away, comes back full forceA parallel to the movie- Monsters, Inc.The "Veruca Salt" mentality we're all afraid of...
Cooking during daytime hours, running in & out of a store, joining a homeschool group... these may seem like everyday occurrences to some families, but at Lisa's house, they felt impossible. She was tasked with getting her neurodivergent son up to state curriculum standards last year while homeschooling, but his pathological demand avoidance made cooperation so hard to attain. NOW - she shares what IS possible now, how her confidence has grown, and what seemed to help when nothing else di...
Does it ever feel like your strong-willed child SNAPS and turns into someone else entirely? Like an alter ego took over? You’re now walking on eggshells trying to diffuse a bomb before it explodes. There are two wires, which one do you cut? Choose SILLY over SERIOUS. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: A situation in college you’d have handled in a similar wayThe ramifications of doubling down on seriousnessWays to inform your mindset that boost your patience and compassionDON'T MISS: Several ex...
Shame is a universal human experience no one is immune to, especially in motherhood where it feels like there’s a right and a wrong way to do everything, yet no matter what you do, you can’t win! How do you break free from the shame cycle? My guest today, Sharon Johnson, is a mother to six who creates social media content focusing on motherhood, mental health, getting older and finding oneself, and healing after years of trauma and crisis. Sharon kicked motherhood off by being absolutel...
What do bad mornings, clingy birthday parties, fighting playdates and candy on the way home from school all have in common? Instead of doubling down to invite the meltdown or giving in to avoid it… there’s a better way! These are all situations where you, as the parent, can intentionally indulge. Tune in to learn how. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: Ways to shift from being reactive to proactive, getting one step ahead of your childWhy “intentionally indulging” works so wellHow to comp...
My guest today, Marli Klaus, is a mom of three, a pediatric sleep consultant, and a trainer and mentor for other sleep consultants as the owner of The Cradle Coach and The Cradle Coach Academy. I’ve known Marli for several years and had the chance to work with her family last winter! In our conversation, Marli shares very openly and honestly about her fears for her son, the way she dreaded pickup, the heartbreaking effect on her other kids, the determination she felt to figure it out he...
Most strong-willed kids struggle with sleep, so if bedtime feels like neverending pulling teeth at your house, join the club! While I'm always going to advocate for nuance and individualization, confidence comes from having a diverse set of tools in your backpocket, so this episode is here to help you have a few more "tricks" up your sleeve. Here's to a shorter bedtime routine for the kids and more time for revenge bedtime procrastination for the adults! :) IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: Why you...
Heather and David, parents from the Midwest, take us along in their journey of parenting their strong-willed five-year-old daughter. Just a few months ago, they were drowning; overwhelmed by her tantrums, feeling like parenting was heartbreaking, stressful, and defeating more days than not. NOW, they are parenting with hope, optimism and confidence, let alone 90% less tantrums overall! Tune in to hear the things that were hard to admit, why they believe they benefitted so much from this...
Can you imagine setting a New Years resolution, watching healthy living content and going to a class where they teach you why you should exercise and expecting to lose weight without ever working out? NO! We know getting stronger requires taking action. In the same way, working on your parenting requires implementation, not just intentions. IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: Ways immersive learning experiences transform parenting skillsWhy it's impossible to grow stronger while "malnourished" and what...
Today's episode is a rare treat. I had a fantastic coaching conversation with a parent of a 4 year-old around an ongoing problem at their house around not listening and not telling the truth when asked about it, and I have her permission to share it with you here! Listen as she shares more of the background into this particular moment as well as her concerns around the behavior, then tune in to hear what I recommended to her (and anyone else who can relate!) IN THIS EPISODE, WE COVERED...
From “I can’t change the world. I’m just a mom” to “I can change the world because I’m a mom!' Cynthia Levin is the author of “From Changing Diapers to Changing the World: Why Moms Make Great Advocates and How to Get Started.” A non-partisan activist working across a variety of issues, she coaches volunteers of all ages to build productive relationships with members of Congress. In our conversation she laid a realistic roadmap for the average mom to get involved where it matters most to her; ...
If all your weekend plans seem held hostage by your strong-willed child’s mood, you’re not alone. In this episode, I name the extra challenges you face on the weekend and specific strategies to tackle them for good, unlocking actual freedom and possibilities to be spontaneous or just enjoy each other and relax! IN THIS EPISODE I SHARED: Why what we think we want isn’t what we actually wantTwo goals to go into every weekend withHow to stop power struggles before they startDON'T MISS: Po...
How can we create a more equitable world that supports motherhood? My guest today, Erin Spahr, is a licensed therapist, mother, feminist, podcast host, and maternal mental health advocate. She uses a feminist lens in her work with mothers in her private practice and strives to help mothers free themselves from oppressive societal expectations and find more self-confidence and self-compassion. Our conversation today spans cultural conditioning, matriscentric feminism, internalized patri...
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