Therapists In The Wild

"Burnout" has become a buzzword since the start of the pandemic, for good reason. Many of us are feeling burnt out, in many areas of life, and could benefit from using DBT skills to cope.  In this episode, Molly and Liza start by defining burnout (i.e. chronic depletion, apathy, a feeling of ineffectiveness no matter how hard you work). We then identify factors that typically lead to burnout, like feeling that your day-to-day lacks meaning or that you lack control over your daily decisions. We explain how to tell the difference between burnout, depression, and stress, and why these distinctions matter.  We respond to an email from a listener who wants to know how seriously to take feelings of burnout, and when to consider making a change. Pulling from Emily and Amelia Nagoski's work, we describe the science behind what burnout does to our bodies and how we can effectively complete the body's stress response cycle. We outline various DBT skills to apply both during extreme moments of burnout (i.e. intense exercise, mindfulness, urge surfing, self-validation, vacation), and when making larger life decisions in response to burnout (i.e. taking an inventory using mindfulness skills, problem-solving, and focusing on values). We hope you enjoy!  We will be taking next month off and, in the meantime, will be re-releasing an old episode on March 1. We look forward to being back on April 1 for our final episode of the season!  *Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild. If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you!

Happy New Year, TITW listeners! As we head into the new year, we're reflecting on the values we want to prioritize and how we can commit to moving toward those values. Since deepening relationships and creating new ones has been on our minds lately, we decided to do an episode on vulnerability. Vulnerability can be defined as "the practice of taking emotional risks even when the outcome is uncertain." We start out by discussing certain forms of anxiety that interfere with opening up even to trusted people in our lives. We then explore what we miss out on when we act on this anxiety (i.e. missing opportunities for closer relationships, as well as feedback, support, and validation). We end by suggesting a few DBT and other skills to use in the moment when anxiety is holding you back from being vulnerable with someone you trust. In the spirit of vulnerability, we share some news about the future of the podcast. If you would like to send feedback/suggestions about what you'd like to see from us in the future, please email us at therapistsinthewild@gmail.com.  If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you! *Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

This month on TITW, we're practicing self-compassion. Liza and Molly have been studying the work of Dr. Kristin Neff, a psychologist and researcher who breaks down the practice of self-compassion into concrete steps. We've noticed a lot of overlap between Dr. Neff's work and DBT skills, and we discuss the similarities in this episode.  We start by defining self-compassion and how it's all about being a friend to yourself. We then get into the barriers of practicing self-compassion (i.e. the erroneous belief that beating ourselves up is the only path toward self-improvement), and point out how taking a more dialectical approach while being kind to ourselves actually leads to more effective problem-solving and learning from mistakes. Molly and Liza each share personal examples of times they have both practiced self-compassion, and, more often, times they have beat themselves up to the point of blocking effective action. We discuss the benefits of practicing self-compassion, and provide a step-by-step approach to the practice, using DBT skills including Mindfulness of Current Emotion, Radical Acceptance, Nonjudgmental and Dialectical Thinking, and good old Opposite Action. We hope you enjoy!  If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you! *Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

This month on TITW, Molly teaches Liza and our listeners concepts from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), another "third wave" cognitive behavioral treatment that both overlaps with and differs from DBT.  Molly has been practicing ACT at her therapy practice, and Liza... needs to brush up on her skills! First, Molly walks us through the six core processes of ACT, including "Cognitive Defusion," which is the process of watching thoughts come and go rather than getting caught up or buying into them. In some ways, this episode is a deep dive on the "Mindfulness of Current Thoughts" skill from the DBT Distress Tolerance module. We discuss how most humans experience unwanted automatic thoughts, and how we those of us with "stickier" brains can benefit from relating differently to such thoughts. We teach several defusion strategies, and also discuss how to use the DBT skill of "Check the Facts" to increase willingness to use these techniques. We wrap up with a coaching session!  Here are some books to help you learn more about ACT:  1) Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life  2) The Happiness Trap 3) ACT Made Simple: An Easy-to-Read Primer on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you! *Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

This month on TITW, we are taking a break from discussions about skills to have an exploratory conversation about Buddhist philosophy, which inspired the practice of DBT. We speak with a special guest, Keerthi Reddy, a masters student at the Harvard Divinity School, who is focusing her studies on Zen Buddhism. First, Liza and Keerthi (old friends from college!) discuss the concept of suffering according to Buddhism, and how accepting reality as it is, and not the way we have been conditioned to interpret it, can reduce suffering. Liza and Keerthi talk about Buddhism as an ethical practice, and explore some critiques of "packaging" Buddhist principles and incorporating them into mental health treatments and in other settings. Through a personal example, Keerthi gives advice on how to separate our experience of reality from reality itself, in order to increase freedom and focus.  In the second half of the episode (starting at 41:00), Molly and Keerthi discuss trauma and spirituality, and specific Buddhist principles that may help with healing from suffering. Keerthi provides more practical advice on how to practice meditation and mindfulness while experiencing trauma-related symptoms. Finally, we discuss how religion and spirituality can help people make meaning from trauma. We hope you enjoy!  If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you! *Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

In this month's episode of TITW, we address a therapy hot topic (and one that Liza and Molly discuss regularly with each other off-air): how to accept feedback in both personal and professional settings, especially when (you perceive) it is negative. We explain why feedback can feel so hurtful to receive, and, on the other side of the dialectic, why it is so often necessary for growth. We share examples from our own lives, particularly throughout our therapist training, of times when even the most upsetting comments have helped us evolve and move toward our values. Understandably, when Emotion Mind shows up, it can be easy to miss the "kernel of truth" in others' input on your behavior. Therefore, we discuss how to use DBT skills in the moment to stay mindful and effective rather than respond impulsively. We give tips on how to manage repetitive negative thoughts related to what was said, and how you might eventually respond once you are in Wise Mind. Finally, we address how to incorporate Self-Respect ("FAST") skills when responding to feedback, particularly if you disagree with the content or how it was delivered. We hope you enjoy and find this episode helpful!  ...And speaking of feedback, we welcome your feedback and would love to hear from you! Please email us at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com and let us know how you've been enjoying Season 2 so far.  If you'd like to support TITW, we would be very grateful for donations of any amount you feel comfortable via Venmo @MollyStDenis. If a donation is not possible at this time, you can still support our work by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you!  *Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com. And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild,  and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

This month, Liza and Molly are thrilled to share one of our favorite episodes yet: our conversation with Chris Jones, a mental health advocate who was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) approximately two years ago. Chris has completed Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and discusses in a radically genuine way both the ups and downs of going through treatment, and how using DBT skills has become second-nature (after a lot of hard work). In the episode, we cover the dialectical nature of the BPD - or Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder - diagnosis, and how getting an accurate diagnosis can be life-changing. Chris also tells us what it is like for him to live with BPD, and how he works to reduce stigma and help others create a life-worth-living through his social media advocacy work. As relative newcomers to the social media mental health space, we ask Chris about its pros and cons. Finally, we discuss our go-to DBT skills in various situations. We can't wait to share this episode with you. We hope you will feel validated, learn as much as we did, and enjoy!  You can follow Chris Jones on Instagram @cjontheborderline.  Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com! And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild, and email us with questions/feedback at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com.

The TITW are officially back for *Season 2* of the podcast! We start off with a few exciting updates, since we can't wait to share what we've been working on during the season break. We discuss plans for the future of the podcast as well as the launch of our new website (!):  therapistsinthewild.com. Please check us out to learn more about the consulting/coaching services we are now offering for therapists and professionals in related fields, or to learn more about us and browse additional DBT resources. Then we get into the topic for today’s episode: when are unwanted emotions - like anger and hurt - effective to act on, rather than act opposite to? We start this discussion off with examples of dogs and babies who seem to have no trouble expressing unwanted emotions, indicating that there may be an evolutionary function of expressing the emotions we feel. We discuss the benefits of effectively expressing how you feel in the moment, including increasing self-respect and improving relationships. We know firsthand how difficult it can be to know when and how to effectively express feelings like anger, sadness, grief, and shame, so we discuss the function of each emotion and provide examples to guide you through using this technique. The episode ends with a few key points to help you determine whether to use the tips discussed in this episode vs. the skill of opposite action. Check out our website at therapistsinthewild.com! And follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild, and email us with questions/feedback at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com.

In this final episode of TITW Season 1, Liza and Molly focus on putting it all together in order to help you stay skillful. Applying DBT skills in daily life is like learning a new language, and we know firsthand how challenging it can be to remember which skills to use when.  To that end, we start by summarizing the skills we've covered this season, in the Mindfulness, Emotion Regulation, Interpersonal Effectiveness, and Distress Tolerance modules. Next, we present scenarios related to suffering from future and past-oriented thoughts, and anxiety in relationships, and brainstorm which skills we might apply in the moment (also known as making a "Cope Ahead" plan).  Finally, we end by listing a few concrete ways to remember all the skills we've gone over so far. We want to thank you for your support and engagement this season, and for bringing this podcast to life for us! We will be busy during the season break brainstorming topics for Season 2, and we would love your input! Please stay subscribed to TITW so you don't miss the start of our next season.  *Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild, and email us with questions/feedback at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com.

It is our last week of teaching new skills (!), and our second to last episode of Season 1! This week, we wrap up the Reality Acceptance part of the Distress Tolerance Module by walking you through how to practice Radical Acceptance, step-by-step.  We start the episode by sharing what acceptance looks like practically, according to DBT, and discuss how fully accepting the moment involves using both your body and your mind. Through listing a few scenarios that might be difficult to accept (i.e. a breakup or a tough relationship with a boss), we review all the steps and discuss how we like to practice each one. Throughout the practice of Radical Acceptance, it is crucial to be open to the experience and the emotions/thoughts that may arise (the DBT skill of "Willingness"). It is equally important to notice and "Turn the Mind" back to Willingness when "willfulness" shows up.  Finally, we provide concrete ways to practice Willingness, particularly if you are feeling willful: "Half-Smile" and "Willing Hands." In addition to explaining why each of these contributes to a willingness to accept reality, Molly walks you through a guided practice in order to learn and apply the skill in real time. We hope you enjoy :) *Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild, and email us with questions/feedback at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com.

In this week's episode, Liza and Molly take on the challenge of introducing the skill of Radical Acceptance, or, as they prefer to call it, "Radical Acknowledgement [of Reality]."  This is some of the "deeper work" in DBT, as it has the capacity to both reduce suffering and create meaningful change in your life.  We start by defining what Radical Acceptance is (hint: it is NOT approving of or liking reality, being passive, or against change), and discuss what it is using a wide range of examples. We then explore how this skill reduces suffering in a variety of ways; for example, radically accepting past regrets often reduces feelings of guilt and shame, and radically accepting (or radically acknowledging) behavior that you disapprove of can decrease anger toward others.  Finally, Molly shares a personal example to demonstrate that when you stop fighting or ignoring reality and truly acknowledge that everything is caused, the result is often grief followed by a deeper sense of peace, meaning, and the capacity to get on with building a Life Worth Living.  This episode is all about what radical acceptance is, and next week we will be talking more specifically about how to practice it. We hope you enjoy :)  *Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild, and email us with questions/feedback at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com.

On today's episode, the TITW are teaching the final set of Crisis Survival Distress Tolerance skills covered in Season 1 of the podcast: Distract using "ACCEPTS" and Self-Soothe. Before we get into it, Molly and Liza share how they practiced TIP and Urge Surfing over the last week. No surprise here, but Tipping the Temperature was immediately effective at changing the current moment and creating a new one. Liza points out that Urge Surfing can be used to ride out ineffective urges anywhere - even in the middle of a stressful Zoom call.  We then introduce "ACCEPTS," which is an acronym of different ways to distract from life’s current stressors when addressing them head-on either isn't possible or wouldn't be effective in the moment. Using personal examples, we share different ways to distract from pain in the short-term with Activities, Contributing, Comparisons, (opposite) Emotions, Pushing away, Thoughts, and Sensations.  Finally, we transition into teaching the Self-Soothe skill, which is about extending comfort to yourself during painful moments by engaging your five senses (vision, hearing, smell, taste, and touch). Liza coaches Molly to use this skill in real time, and we share some tricks of the trade, including how to make and keep a "self-soothe kit" on hand at all times - in case of emergency. We hope you enjoy!  *Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild. Email us with questions at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com. 

If there was ever a time to practice Distress Tolerance skills, it is now! Liza and Molly recorded this episode on election night, when they needed *all* the skills. After a quick review of the STOP skill, you will learn the skill of Urge Surfing, which is a mindfulness technique that helps you surf urges to engage in ineffective behaviors instead of acting on them, using your breath as your surfboard. After teaching the skill, Molly leads you through a guided Urge Surfing exercise, to help you put this skill into practice. Next, Liza and Molly introduce the TIP skills -- a TITW and DBT-fan favorite. The TIP skills include, 1) Tip the Temperature, 2) Intense Exercise, 3) Paced Breathing, and 4) Paired Muscle Relaxation. Molly and Liza practice Tipping the Temperature live on air, and Molly hilariously dunks her entire face in a bowl of cold water to help demonstrate how well this skill works. Finally, Liza leads you through a guided Paired Muscle Relaxation practice so you can relieve any remaining tension in your body before ending the episode. We hope you enjoy! *To see visual demonstrations of the TIP skills, we recommend you check out the DBT-RU YouTube Page: https://www.youtube.com/c/DBTRU/videos *Follow TITW on Instagram and Facebook @ TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild. As always, feel free to email us with questions, special topic requests, or feedback at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com.

Welcome to the Distress Tolerance module, which is the final set of skills covered in Season 1 of the podcast! We share exciting plans that are in the works for Season 2, including a variety of guests and special topics requested by listeners. In introducing the module, we explain the goals of Distress Tolerance skills and how the module divides them into two parts: 1) Crisis Survival skills and 2) Reality Acceptance skills. Liza and Molly define the term "crisis" and give examples of what a crisis might look in your life; for example, some people who are more emotionally sensitive and who have experienced chronic invalidation might experience crises on a daily basis while others may only experience them during the hardest moments of their lives, or somewhere in between. We then describe when to use Crisis Survival skills as well as times that it would be ineffective to do so. Finally, we teach the first Crisis Survival skill: the "STOP" skill (Stop, Take a step back, Observe, and Proceed mindfully). STOP is the first skill to use when you’re extremely distressed because, as the episode title suggests, it will prevent you from impulsively acting on emotion urges that could make the situation worse. Hope you enjoy :)  *Follow TITW on Instagram and Facebook @ TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild. Email us with questions, special topic requests, or feedback at TherapistsInTheWild@gmail.com. 

Join Molly as she leads you through a brief, guided mindfulness practice: the Mountain Meditation by Jon Kabat-Zinn (2002). This meditation will help you experience a sense of being grounded, enabling you to access your inner strength and stability when faced with challenging circumstances, as many of us are right now. Stress and anxiety make it more difficult to connect to the present moment and access Wise Mind, both of which are critical to acting effectively in all interpersonal interactions. As we discussed in last week's episode, cultivating a sense of inner strength by connecting with your values and being fair to yourself is key to self-respect effectiveness. We hope this practice will help you feel more like a mountain, unwavering in your values and rooted in a stable sense of self, even in the face of anxiety-provoking conversations, painful relationship dynamics, and constant internal and external change. *Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @ TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

This episode begins with Molly sharing how she delivered a DEAR MAN using GIVE skills this week to promote TITW on a social media site (it worked!). Then, we get into the topic for this week: using FAST skills to increase and maintain self-respect. This skill is all about feeling proud of yourself after an interaction because you communicated in a way that honored your personal values. Liza and Molly discuss the idea that your actions influence others' behavior, and therefore the importance of saying no and communicating personal limits. We use lots of examples and funny role plays to introduce the FAST skills, another questionable acronym that stands for being Fair to yourself, making no Apologies, Sticking to values, and being Truthful. Throughout the episode, Molly and Liza discuss the role self-validation plays in honoring self-respect, how lying can degrade self-respect over time, and how practicing FAST skills can lead to a more stable sense of self by delineating where you end and others begin. We wrap up the episode with a series of role plays to illustrate how you can use FAST skills to assert yourself when delivering a DEAR MAN, or when simply highlighting behavior you'd like to change. We hope you enjoy :)  *Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @ TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild.

Molly and Liza begin today's episode with a review of the core interpersonal effectiveness skill in DBT: DEAR MAN. Liza shares a homework example in which she delivered a DEAR MAN to provide constructive feedback to a colleague, balancing priorities related to objective and relationship effectiveness. Then, we transition into discussing how to deliver a DEAR MAN when the relationship is the main priority. We introduce guidelines for relationship effectiveness through (yet) another acronym: "GIVE" (Be Gentle, Act Interested, Validate, and Easy Manner). Throughout the episode, Liza and Molly pay particular attention to a listener question about resentment, and Molly shares an example that highlights how these guidelines can be used to address this crucial issue in relationships. We end the episode with role plays that emphasize how to use the GIVE skills to ask for what you want or say no when prioritizing the relationship is your main goal. We hope you enjoy!  *Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @ TherapistsInTheWild, and Twitter @TherapistsWild. 

This week on TITW, Molly and Liza teach "DEAR MAN," a simple acronym that will help you be effective in asking for what you want, communicating a personal limit, or even saying no to another's request. DEAR MAN is the foundation of all the DBT interpersonal effectiveness skills, and this week's episode focuses specifically on applying the skill when achieving your objective is the main goal. We will continue building on the material from this episode as we teach how to prioritize the relationship and self-respect in the coming weeks. To introduce the skill, Liza shares a fun fact about what she originally thought DEAR MAN was ;) Then, we review the acronym, providing tips and examples throughout. DEAR (Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce) stands for "what" you do in the conversation, and MAN (Stay Mindful, Appear Confident, Negotiate) stands for "how" you do it. Finally, instead of coaching, Liza and Molly laugh their way through various role plays to give you a sense of what some skillful - and less skillful - DEAR MAN (MEN?) look like. Enjoy!  *Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.

Welcome to the Interpersonal Effectiveness module! Liza and Molly begin by discussing their plan to explore topics such as cultural adaptations of these (and other DBT) skills in Season 2 of the podcast, which we will begin after we finish teaching all of the skills as they are written in Marsha Linehan’s DBT manual this season. To introduce the module, we explore the benefits of using these skills, as well as factors that commonly interfere with effective interpersonal communication. Using examples, we identify the three goals of interpersonal effectiveness: 1) objective effectiveness, 2) relationship effectiveness, and 3) self-respect effectiveness. Finally, through coaching, Liza helps Molly rank the relative importance of these goals in a challenging professional relationship, which will inform how Molly handles the situation. We hope you enjoy!  *Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.

The TITW are joined by Dr. Kiki Fehling, clinical psychologist (and former member of our Rutgers DBT team!), to discuss the Biosocial Theory of how emotion dysregulation (and BPD) develops. After graduating from Yale University, Kiki earned her PhD from Rutgers University and has received intensive training in DBT, CBT, and evidence-based trauma treatments. While she has worked with a broad range of clients, she has particular expertise working with members of the LGBTQ+ community, people recovering from significant traumas and health or medical issues, and people who engage in self-harm. As DBT is based on the Biosocial Theory of personality functioning, Kiki explains the premise that emotion dysregulation results from early biological vulnerabilities for emotional sensitivity combined with chronic and pervasive invalidation, as well as their interaction and transaction over time. Throughout the episode, we discuss how understanding this model can help with emotion regulation and improve relationships. Enjoy, and stay skillful!  *Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.