Claim OwnershipMad Max Minute presents: Waterworld (1995)
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Join Rick and Julia as they sail through 1995’s Waterworld H2O-minutes at a time!
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To commemorate the 25th anniversary of Waterworld releasing in theaters, The Mad Max Minute is happy to announce that season 5 will begin releasing episodes the first Tuesday in August with new episodes releasing on a weekly basis after that.
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10 years after Max Rockatansky walked into the sunset at the end of Beyond Thunderdome Kevin Costner stepped onto the big screen and urinated into a cup, introducing movie-going audiences to Waterworld. Despite its big ambitions, and equally big budget, the movie failed to wow critics, but 25 years after its release we hope to give the film its due by watching it h2o-minutes at a time.
With a sip from the still and a spit for his lime tree, we see the face of our protagonist, The Mariner, but a sudden snag on the trawling line signals time for action. Gathering his materials and setting his timer, The Mariner dives into the water leaving us to marvel at the many features of his Trimaran as time passes until the timer runs out and trips the mechanical winch to start turning.
The Mariner surfaces from his deep dive with new treasures in hand, but before he can make an accounting of his plunder He realizes that a Drifter has found him. The Drifter is quick to say that he did not board the Trimaran, but his eagerness to leave has The Mariner on edge. He has seen the Drifter’s boat before but he does not recognize the man who now captains the vessel.
The Mariner offers to trade with The Drifter in accordance with “the code” but The Drifter refuses, citing his recent visit to an Atoll eight days east of their current position. The exchange is cut short when The Mariner spots some Smokers in the distance. The Drifter raises his sail to make a run for it but makes the mistake of revealing that he’s stolen The Mariner’s limes.
Special Guest: Cassadilla
Faced with the possibility of losing his bounty to bloodthirsty pirates, The Mariner steers his Trimaran into danger and snatches the float bag long before the smokers can get close to it. Treasures in hand, The Mariner turns his sights on the lime-stealing drifter and with a swift strike from his port-side span cleaves the smaller boat’s mast in two, leaving the thief to his gruesome fate.
Before the imposing gates of the Atoll, an old man pleads with the Gatesman to let him trade his hair for water. The Enforcer arrives in time to see a different sort of trader approach, The Mariner on his Trimaran. They refuse his initial request to trade, seeing only artifacts fished from the deep water, but when the stranger produces a whole jar of dirt, he’s immediately invited inside.
The Mariner sails his Trimaran into the Atoll and its mighty gates close behind him. Cut off from the open ocean, The Mariner is surrounded by civilization; Atollers gawk at the newcomer, butchers work at a large sea creature, and the Atoll’s Elders conduct a funeral as they commit a body to the organo barge. The Mariner docks his Trimaran and gets a visit from the Enforcer.
The Mariner brings his dirt to the Atoll’s Banker to see what kind of fortune can be gained from the rare substance. The negotiations are tense, but The Mariner is able to walk away with a small fortune and heads to the trading barge where a fair-haired stranger is extracting secrets from one of the Atoll’s more desperate denizens.
Special Guest: Dave Pallas from 5 Minutes of Mystery
Stepping up to the trading counter, The Mariner finds that the shelves are mostly bare. He catches the attention of the storekeeper, a woman named Helen, and buys up her stock of freshwater and line. With not much else on offer, The Mariner orders some hydro as The Nord rises from his seat and makes his way towards the bar.
The Mariner is at the bar, just trying to enjoy his hydro, but The Nord is determined to drag him kicking and screaming into a social interaction. The two Outwaters are distracted by the sudden arrival of a small girl with a tattoo on her back. Helen is quick to usher the young Enola out of sight, and The Mariner purchases a tomato plant.
The Mariner heads back to his boat with the plethora of wares purchased from the trading barge. Helen trails along behind him asking about his travels and if the dirt he traded came from Dryland. The Atoll Elders stop the Mariner in his tracks and request that he impregnate a young woman. The Mariner’s refusal sparks conflict and the Gatesman makes a startling discovery.
The Mariner has been exposed as a mutant and is now in a fight for his life. He’s tackled into the water and manages to kill his attacker, but He’s caught in a net and dragged into the grasp of the mob. The Enforcer arrives and takes custody of The Mariner, decrying mob rule and imprisoning him in a cage and seizing his goods.
Special Guests: Caitlin & Chris from A Star to Steer Her By: A Star Trek Podcast
Locked high in a cage, The Mariner watches as The Nord is allowed to leave the Atoll while in a nearby meeting hall the population is gathered to decide his fate. The crowd is shown the various spy tools taken from the trimaran and the general consensus is that the mutant must be destroyed, but Helen has other ideas.
As the Atoll Elders insist that The Mariner is a danger to them and other Atolls, Helen raises the point that fewer and fewer Atolls are being seen and the processes that allow for civilization are breaking down with greater frequency. Her assertions paint a metaphorical target on her back and with the encouragement of the Gatesman, the crowd turns against Helen.
High in his windmill, the Atoll’s resident engineer, Gregor, believes he has made a breakthrough in deciphering Enola’s tattoo, but he quickly realizes that it’s just another wild theory. He curses the heavens, but Helen’s concerned expression speaks of a more terrestrial concern as it seems the other residents of the Atoll are preparing to do Enola harm.
Despite Helen’s urgency to leave the Atoll, Gregor is unwilling to leave until he is able to decipher Enola’s tattoo. Enola suggests Gregor speak to the Mariner and he does, finding the gilled stranger sulking in his hanging cage. Gregor can scarcely say two words before erupting in giggles over seeing someone with a mutation up close.
Special Guests: Andrew & Kestra Darowski from Disney Animated Minute Essentials
Gregor tries to pry information about Dry Land from the Mariner, but his only concern is a mooring cleat that could prove useful in his escape. Despite Gregor’s apparent willingness to help, he is chased off by the Enforcer who catches him from a distance. The Mariner spends the rest of the night sulking in his cage as the sun rises on a new day.
Helen and Enola join the crowd as the Atollers file their way onto the Organo Barge to hear the Elders pass judgment on The Mariner. Unsurprisingly, the sentence is death, but as the Enforcer begins lowering the cage into the bog, a lookout on a watchtower spies an armada of smokers heading straight for the Atoll.
We mention our Patreon at the end of every episode, but we never tell you about our weekly bonus episodes. The bonus episodes usually run about 30 minutes and are recorded the same day we post them, so they’re less edited and a lot more current than a standard episode. This week we talked about the recent passing of Hugh Keays-Byrne, so Julia thought it a good idea to give our regular listeners a taste of what we do outside of the normal feed.
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