The Gnar Couch Podcast

This might just be the best mountain bike podshow you’ve ever hate-listened to. That’s right—podshow, because podcasts are boring and suck, and furthermore, calling it a podcast would be an insult to the fine tradition of nonsense, awkward silences, and self-inflicted pain we serve up with all the grace of Boston Rob “making it clap” at dance parties (yes, that actually happened).  On this episode, we’re uniting mountain bikers the best way we know how: by traumatizing Boston Rob with potential electrocution every time he laughs or drops an F-bomb (so basically, every ten seconds), peppering our guest Sergi “Ride Caviar” Massot with questions he doesn't want to answer, and dissecting the fine art of refusing to do something scary the first time, unless it’s stealing a Monster fridge while blacked out after a BMX event (best Sergi story yet). There’s enough childish conversation about absolute carnage on trails, dog tributes, and existential dread over medical bills to make you feel at home, disrespected, and weirdly motivated, all at once. So if you thought you were signing up for thoughtful, nuanced mountain bike commentary, you’re almost as dumb as the hosts. Welcome to the Gnar Couch Podshow—the only podshow where the runtime is matched only by the length of our collective hospital bills. Hit play. Enjoy the accompanying mental degradation. Guest info: Ride Caviar Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. We've added old episodes, downloadable songs, and give you early access to raw, uncut shows for only $4.20/month. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom". 00:00 "Joining Patreon Celebration Tonight" 07:33 Patreon Ringtone Request 16:53 "Adopting the Perfect Puppy" 19:47 Extreme Danger on Double Black Trails 25:21 Forest vs. Desert Riding Preferences 31:37 "Utah Trip: Costly Experience" 37:37 Wheelchair Trailblazing in Squamish 43:38 Hard Work Over Talent 46:47 Overshot Jump at Pride Fiesta 55:53 Drunken BMX Misadventure 57:31 "Nollie RMU Racer Appreciation" 01:05:38 "Oral Connections & Affordable Access" 01:07:29 "Rob's Crisis Escalates"

It’s episode 178 of the Gnar Couch Podshow! We’re already three minutes in and the F-bomb counter is higher than your buddy who “microdosed” but forgot the “micro.” Utah probably hates us (again), but that’s fine—Utah also hates fun, women's thighs, and beer over 4%. But, this isn't your dad’s mountain bike podcast. Actually, your dad probably left because you bought an E-bike, then he joined a Facebook group called Lycra Enthusiasts Who Love Buttholes. Guess what? We’re all you’ve got now. This episode: memes, caffeine jitters, brown-eye contact, and the unholy truth that “analog” is being horribly mispronounced. Mountain bike culture is dead, and we’re here performing a necrophilia-themed jazzercise class on its stiff little corpse. Joining us is the meme-lord himself, Ryden Dirty—43 years old, knees like stale breadsticks, and a professional at making Facebook warriors cry into their Garmin watches. He’s an ex-BMXer, chef, and current semi-professional button-pusher. If you get offended by him, congratulations—you’re softer than a Casey’s gas station pizza. We’ve also got: A Zoom room full of Russian bots who keep trying to sell us boner pills. Facebook dads with “opinions” so bad they make your uncle’s QAnon posts look reasonable. A merch store with more hoodies than a middle school vape circle. Throw in some ADHD, chef rage, and a bunch of dudes old enough to schedule colonoscopies around bike rides, and you’ve got yourself a certified Gnar Couch dumpster fire. So grab a chamois, double up if your prostate needs it, and let’s kick this turd downhill. Welcome to Gnar Couch, where joy comes to die and the only KOM we care about is “King of Mediocrity.” Guest info: Ryden Dirty Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. We've added old episodes, downloadable songs, and give you early access to raw, uncut shows for only $4.20/month. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom". 00:00 Couch Crushers Instagram Mishap 07:29 Message Us Anytime 14:55 "Analog Cycling Over E-bike" 18:25 "E-Bike Epiphany" 26:19 "Social Media Free Speech Shift" 28:36 "Embracing Authenticity in Social Media" 35:48 Mountain Biking Frustration Transition 44:03 "Biking Distance Challenges" 46:34 Teasing Chris Canfield 52:57 "E-Bike Antics Spark Controversy" 58:09 Expanding Mountain Biking Stories 01:05:22 Managing Subscriptions and New Content 01:08:00 "Call Us After Ben's Song"

This might be the best mountain bike podshow you’ll ever subject your bleeding ears to, but let’s not get too full of ourselves. If you’re looking for pro tips, life-changing inspiration, or anything more educational than a Snickers wrapper, you should probably tune out now. Welcome to the Gnar Couch Podshow, where “podshow” means we get away with even more bad decisions, lowbrow humor, and colossally poor life choices than your average podcast. Sure, we occasionally discuss bikes, but only if we get sidetracked from rating sushi in grocery stores, the science of adjusting your audio knobs, and discussing Cheef's mysterious and apparently imaginary friend, Chinese Adam. On this special episode, we drag Rob Brown—the evil genius behind Loam Pass and the definitely-not-mysterious Bike Sushi meme page—into our den of degenerates. Yes, he appears to bleach his hair for maximum radness, and yes, his Loam Pass business is either the future of bike park access or a plot to take your beer money and run to Thailand (Just kidding, the MTB Pass lady already did that). He takes us deep into the beautiful hellscape of organizing a pass for 70+ (and growing) North American bike parks, fighting the Big Bike industrial complex, and trying to break into Colorado bike parks. But rest assured, this is still the Gnar Couch Podshow: we’ll try (and fail) to talk about bikes, share sponsored hate for overpriced water, reminisce about having bikes stolen and miraculously returned and running over bike thieves, and find new ways to offend everyone from CrossFit dads to the trail police. Is this a good episode? We don’t know. We’ve literally never made one. So crank those headphones until your eardrums file a restraining order and settle in for a show that’s about bikes, about everything else, and, most importantly, about nothing at all. Guest info: Loam Pass Bike Sushi Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. We've added old episodes, downloadable songs, and give you early access to raw, uncut shows for only $4.20/month. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom". 00:00 Podcast Sponsorship Blackmail Strategy 07:27 New Baggy Shirts at Narcouch 16:33 Epic Biking Adventures Pass 21:50 "Southern Adventure Hotspots" 24:20 Ski Resort Negotiation Challenges 32:36 Pass Usage Predictability Model 37:52 "Encounter at 45th Maverick" 42:10 Old-School Ski Pass Decline 45:45 "Excessive Honesty Dilemma" 50:40 Delayed Launch Success 56:15 Favorite Bike Parks: Spirit & Marquette 01:04:16 "Cody's Sudden GPS Failure" 01:13:05 "Bliz Eyewear Discount Code" 01:16:06 "Join Our Patreon for Extras"

Welcome to another absolutely questionably legal episode of the Gnarcouch Podshow. This is episode 175—which honestly, we’re just as surprised it happened as you are. If you’ve ever tried to tune your suspension with ChatGPT, eaten three-day-old elk meat out of a fanny pack, or asked a stranger at Whistler to jump over your Tesla Cybertruck in a torrential downpour, congratulations: you’ve stumbled into the right corner of the internet. Tonight, we’ve got Christian “probably peppered my jumps with more style than you have in your entire sad existence” Peper in the studio, and the whole studio smells like unwashed knee pads, half-done parenting, and unresolved childhood trauma. JP’s here, reminding everyone he was once called an unmentionable name by some dude using a random curse generator on the dark web. Boston Rob’s on voice recognition patrol—dude’s voice is so loud it folds the space-time continuum. We’re talking e-bikes, jump progression, why your city’s bike park is softer than a TikTok cosplayer’s handshake, and, as always, questionable bathroom etiquette. Jimmy’s busy making foot fetish videos for the Patreon, and the phrase “family-friendly” has already violated three Geneva Conventions. So, tighten your helmet, lower your standards, and get ready: this is episode 175, and it’s gonna be more chaotic than a grown-ass man arguing with a trail steward about Class 1 e-bike erosion while half the room tries to decide if Freebird is appropriate shitting music. Let’s kick this thing off—hold on to your buttholes, Nards. Guest profile: Christian Peper Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom". 00:00 "Trailhead Aggression Unleashed" 13:10 ChatGPT: A Useful Bike Tuning Guide 25:52 Mindful Kids' Presence on Social Media 42:18 Bridging Bike Skill Gaps 51:38 Progressive Jump Line Ambitions 01:00:17 Action Over Promotion Disconnect 01:10:02 Frustration Over Salt Lake Traffic Changes 01:21:10 Career Shift to Social Media Success 01:28:22 Crafting Effective Video Hooks 01:37:46 Instagram Algorithm Enhances User Engagement 01:47:40 "E-Bike Necessity for Busy Riders" 02:02:26 Homemade Kefir and Root Beer 02:12:18 "Defiant Trail Ride"

Roll up and throw your tailgate pad on this dumpster fire as we take you through the trainwreck history of the Gnar Couch Podshow, a masterclass in turning angry biker angst and stray couches into the only show less appropriate than your browser history. We dig into three surprisingly important themes: 1) how a decaying couch at a dirt jump park somehow sparked years of irreverent mountain bike content, 2) the relentless drive to gather all the misfit “dirtbags who are actually nice people” into a worldwide cult—even if it meant spamming Facebook groups until we got banned, and 3) the podshow’s evolution as a real-time therapy session for former skateboarders, current weirdos, and angry outcasts who worship at the altar of “shred till bed.” We’re just trying to find people as broken as us...and the good news is, it totally worked. Is this audaciously low-brow origin story going to make you smarter? Almost definitely not. But it will make you feel better about whatever you’re doing with your life. So settle in and bask in the glory of a podshow created out of spite, sustained by idiocy, and beloved by dozens of mountain bikers, at least half of whom are probably mentally unstable. Welcome to the chaos you never knew you needed. Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom". 00:00 Gnar Couch History Unveiled 12:03 Skateboarding Vibes in New Adventures 24:00 Unexpected Adult Toy Giveaway 38:37 "Radio Stories: Good, Bad, Untold" 52:30 Embracing Interactive Live Streaming 57:23 Reflecting on Friendship and Conflict 01:12:19 "Unique Format Boosts Mental Health" 01:17:07 Misunderstood Contributions Validated 01:35:54 Lingering Resentment Over Past Betrayal 01:44:28 Weekend Party Planning Insights 01:52:51 Impressive Skills and Growing Potential 02:03:31 "Reflecting on Creative Process" 02:15:57 "Blizz Sunglasses Discount & Praise" 02:27:20 Gratitude for Support and Community 02:33:33 "Stupid and Beautiful Memories"

This could easily be the most over-caffeinated, under-medicated mountain bike podshow you’ll ever subject your earholes to. Not a podcast—a “podshow”—because adding “show” makes everything about 17% more questionable. Welcome to Gnar Couch, where the only thing more inflated than our egos is our caffeine intake, and the only thing more shredded than our bikes are our self-images. Tonight, we brought in DJ Brandt—your favorite rider’s favorite wildcard—just to see if we could make the art of the mountain bike interview as awkwardly sweaty and weird as possible. This week’s podshow spiral dives helmet-first into three core themes: the existential crisis of being a professional freerider in an industry run by desk jockeys who think a “manual” is something you create in Word to guide marketing efforts, the painful evolution of mountain bike culture from “gnarly misfit circus” to “influencer hellscape,” and why the only thing more unstable than the bike industry is JP's and the Jerk Hand's digestive systems after six glizzies chased with six cups of gas station coffee. Sprinkle in debates about corporate buyouts, a discussion about how Pinkbike really was cool at one time, and our relentless need to grill and mother everyone within a 40-foot radius, and you’ve got yourself an audio experience that makes you wonder where the adult supervision went. So buckle up—preferably in your daily driver Corvette or whatever heap you wrench on to avoid facing your feelings. Whether you’re here for the tales of bike park glory, the communal hate for TikTok “riders,” or just to hear DJ Brandt contemplate welding versus wildcarding, this podshow is the least productive thing you’ll do with your day—and probably the best. Guest profile: DJ Brandt Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom". 00:00 Spotlight on Rising Freedar Star 19:53 Corporate Exploitation of Action Sports Talent 25:49 Transition from Hobby to Profession 37:57 Epic Southern Drop Stunts 49:28 Innovative Photographer's Whistler Legacy 01:03:53 "Rampage Week Step-Down Memory" 01:06:32 "Surprising Flight Radio Skill" 01:23:32 Deer Valley Women's Clinic Finale 01:30:18 "Wild Rampage Camping Memories" 01:47:43 Process Visualization Technique 01:54:49 Obsessive Productivity Tendency 02:02:38 Misunderstanding Over Car Incident  

Welcome to the Gnar Couch Podshow, which is like a podcast but with less dignity, more self-loathing, and at least a 50% higher chance of your spouse asking, “What the hell are you listening to?” Picture a virtual dirt jump party where a bunch of underachieving mountain bikers, powerlifting BMX dads, and wannabe nutritional influencers swap stories about getting jacked after 40, sacrificing wildlife on Colorado roads, and trying to hit jumps that are way out of their league—all while waxing poetic about mini horses, chia seed poops, and why enthusiasm for the sport is inversely proportional to one’s actual riding skill. Centered around three main themes—obtaining mountain bike excellence, fitness for aging riders, and the dark, sticky underbelly of “enthusiast” culture—this podshow delivers a potent cocktail of sarcasm and fitness advice. Whether you’re here to hear tales of gym reluctance and the dignity-obliterating process of learning to powerlift over 40 years old, or you just want to increase your biking skills, rest assured: we’re here along with fitness coach Jeff Robertson to help in our own special way. So pull up your favorite moldy couch cushion, pretend you’re at Swamp Fest with a cold shower aftertaste, and let Jeff, Cheef, Rob, Jimmy Sniper, and JP prove once and for all that growing old is mandatory, but growing up is strictly optional. Welcome to the Gnar Couch Podshow—the best mountain bike podshow you’ll ever regret listening to. Guest profile: Jeff Robertson Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

This could easily be the most dangerously mediocre mountain bike podshow you’ve ever subjected yourself to—if only because there isn’t another one like it. But let’s not call it a “podcast.” It’s the Gnar Couch Podshow, a half-shaved circus animal of a program that fuses mountain biking banter, pre-school-level humor, and the sort of camaraderie you only find in places where head injuries outnumber IQ points. We’re back again, same as ever (possibly worse), welcoming Ryan McElmon, whose only real flaw is being good at every sport—while the rest of us are just good at lying about our skills. Settle in as Cheef, Jimmy Sniper, Boston Rob, JP/Uncle Touchy, and Ryan ping-pong between three of our favorite recurring disasters: relentless self-roasting for our questionable riding prowess, dissecting why Utah’s mountain bike scene is built on equal parts skill and sheer obliviousness, and an ungodly amount of time spent discussing “firsts”—band shirts, head trauma, and the sort of sponsor deals that make you miss your dignity. It’s all sandwiched between tales of kids who look up to us (bad choice), pro-level athletes who out-drink and out-ski us, and the utter confusion of surviving a town where Dairy Keen is apparently a cultural touchstone. So grab a non-alcoholic beer (thanks, Ryan), dust off your New Kids on the Block tee, and prepare for a tour through the rarely-admired underbelly of mountain bike podcasting—where the only thing deeper than our self-deprecation is our collective concussion history. Welcome to the Gnar Couch Podshow: the stoke is questionable, the jokes are suspect, but at least you’ll feel better about your own life decisions. Guest profile: Ryan McElmon Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

Holy shit. Welcome to episode 171 of the Gnar Couch Podshow, the very special “Revel Bikes hostage rescue operation,” a.k.a. the episode where every former industry bro, current stoke vampire, and accidental HR case decided to restart one of the most revered MTB bike brands and discuss it with us for some reason. Has your bike ever cost more than your car but handled like it was actually made out of expired condoms? Us too. That’s why tonight we’ve packed your digital clown car with more mountain bike icons than a private equity firm’s bankruptcy spreadsheet. (We say this in the most loving way, as you'll find out.) Cheef here, fresh off a Dairy Keen soft serve bender and contemplating my place in this late-stage capitalist hellscape we call mountain biking. Boston Rob’s still dripping in dad rock and peanut butter cup stains, JP's been busy mansplaining Johnny Cash’s genre to oblivion, and Jimmy’s just out here rage-connecting all of us with big podcast stepdad energy. Chris Canfield is in studio, ready to pivot—literally, with his damn suspension kinematics and figuratively with his HR-compliant mustache. And, not to be outdone, we’ve dragged Adam “I just bought my own company back because fuck you, that’s why” Miller, Mike “Too Steezy For Your Face” Giese, Deano the XC Nerd, whose med device stories will ensure you never trust French boobs or European healthcare again, and another round of your unhinged Oral Connections calls. Strap on a bib (or a thong, if that’s your flavor), crack a Mezcal, and get ready for almost two hours of raw, unfiltered shit-talking about private equity stupidity, bike spec foreplay, soft serve-sized trauma, and what it actually feels like when your carbon dream bike files for Chapter 11 before being resurrected like the bicycle Jesus it actually is. We’re more country than Austin, less country than Nashville, prouder than a Fox News viewer at a Willie Nelson concert, and about as reliable as a monkey with a PowerPoint deck. Listen, because we might actually answer a bike question, but mostly we’ll just revel in Dad jokes, derailleur puns, and the existential dread of modern consumerism. Welcome, you sick bastards. Let’s get seriously weird and weirdly serious together. Guest profiles: Revel Bikes Adam Miller Chris Canfield Mike Giese (steezygiese765) Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

You just stumbled onto the Gnar Couch Podshow—yes, “podshow,” because “podcast” is for people with functioning attention spans and fewer deeply repressed issues about outdoor furniture. We're the audio equivalent of finding a slightly wet couch at a trailhead: deeply unsettling, weirdly comfy, and probably hiding at least two species of insect (metaphorically). Our not-so-highly-trained panel dives straight into three pillars of modern mountain bike culture: (1) sending it big and eating it just as hard—broken bones, torn ACLs, and the never-ending pursuit of avoiding therapy bills by riding bikes off cliffs; (2) the sacred (and vaguely inappropriate) art of shuttling and cuddling, because real friendship is when you don't question how the couch got wet; and (3)the life of UCI racers Luke and Alex Mallen and the mainline reality check of working your ass off to chase down racing dreams while surviving on hand-me-down underwear and side-hustles aerating strangers’ lawns. All delivered with enough self-loathing to fill a foam pit and enough edge to tear your shins up worse than cheap flat pedals. So while we’re never going to be the podshow your mom wants to hear, we are the one you can't mention at work without getting a visit from HR. Grab the least-suspicious seat in the trailer, ignore the scent (just like we ignore the rules), and brace for the greatest self-sabotaging, semi-inspirational, off-the-rails mountain bike podshow to grace your undeserving ears. Welcome to Gnar Couch, where we race, we crash, and occasionally, we actually learn something—but only by accident.

Sweet Jesus riding a mini horse through a desert mesa of expired meat sticks, what a podshow we have for you this week. It’s episode 169, which if you think about it, is just 100 positions away from being remotely impressive. Tonight, we're joined by the Queen of Dark Fest herself, Chelsea Kimball, a.k.a. Her Darkness. Boston Rob’s explains how he falls asleep on the toilet, JP’s dog is most likely the source of local cougar sightings, Jimmy's dad jokes prove to be the only funny part of the show again, and I (Cheef), diagnosed (by past cast members) narcissist, am mostly here to remind you how important I am. So kick back in your sweet recliner, dust the Dorito crumbs off your jorts, and get ready for 90 minutes of sometimes serious-sometimes stupid Rampage, Dark Fest, and freeride talk with Chelsea, life advice you should never take, pizza-eating tips, and the kind of banter that makes you regret learning English. Dark Fest, Rampage, hot laps, and hot garbage. We’ve got it all. If you want high-level, coherent mountain bike discourse, try whatever podcast Pinkbike produces. If you want to learn several ways to crash on back flips and how to properly urinate at social functions, you’re in the right spot. Welcome to the Gnar Couch Podshow, where the only thing gayer than the six guys in our show trailer is how much we fucking love you for listening. Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

Strap in, degenerates, because—holy shit—episode 168 of the Gnar Couch Podshow descends on your brain like a Raptor cranked to 11, meth in the tank, and some dude named Lars judging your court case from the witness stand while Kid Rock shotguns a Busch Light in the background. Have you ever mixed an unwashed pair of five-panels with Swedish thrash metal and a keen yearning to eat trail dust in Virgin, Utah, all while contemplating whether your bones have enough density to survive the next catastrophic OTB? No? Well, welcome to our support group. This episode, we’ve got Amelia Capuano in the mix—slapping more send than your mom’s boyfriend does Dew out of your hands, and just as calculated about it. JP still can’t tell the difference between Voltron, Power Rangers, and probably his own reflection, while Cheef’s somewhere in a parking lot mourning his inability to clear a jump that only eight-year-olds and groms with fresh HU Bars can manage. Boston Rob’s over here leaning into his final-form Jewfluencer, generational trauma, and all, channeling his father-in-law while rocking those glasses down his nose like he’s one matzo short of a bar mitzvah. Is this intro going anywhere? Nope. Are you? Not if you’re stuck in traffic, three accidents deep, hovering over your brake pedal, wondering if tonight is the night you finally call in to our show and forget the damn phone number again. We’ve got tales of dirt jumpers crumpling under childhood trauma, chocolate bars worth more than your last pay stub, and Jimmy Sniper explaining how to achieve pegatration at your local skatepark. So unclench, quit saying “keen” unless you want us to actually start using “chuffed” unironically, and let’s get this parasocial fever dream rolling harder than Mark Cuban’s hairless head at a Shark Tank reject afterparty. Let’s go. Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

Buckle up, degenerates—this episode of the Gnar Couch Podshow is a full-throttle plunge into the chaos of what might’ve been the gayest TDS Enduro yet (their words, not ours… actually, no, definitely ours). Cheef, JP, Boston Rob, and Jimmy Sniper are back, joined by misfits like April Zastrow, Ryan Rodriguez, NRML Mountain Biker, Teddy Hayden, and the mysteriously moist Colon Bumb, to unpack a weekend of sketchy lines, worse decisions, and the kind of campfire games that could get you banned from most public lands. There’s mud. There’s mayhem. There’s Jimmy’s godforsaken toe again (still dominating IG for some reason). Expect carnage, broken breakfast promises, heckling, pissed-off land owners, chair tackles, and the kind of post-race storytelling that smells like beer farts and regret. It’s raw, it’s ridiculous, and it’s very Gnar Couch. Press play or forever wonder what a gay TDS even means. Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

Welcome back to the Gnar Couch Podshow, where adult supervision is still just a rumor. This week, Chief, Boston Rob, and JP/Uncle Touche are joined by Ben Crockett—author, former editor of BMX Plus!, and full-time nostalgia dealer—for a full-throttle blast through the wild-ass chaos of growing up BMX, skating, and blowing stuff up in the 80s and 90s. Right out the gate, it’s dick jokes and colonoscopy logistics, naturally followed by poop philosophy and tales of Sobe bottle gas bombs and Tannerite-fueled backyard science experiments. Just your typical Tuesday with the Gnar crew. Ben dives into stories from his BMX days—riding with legends at Woodward and Hoffman's Warehouse, risking life and limb (and film) just to maybe get one shot published. His new book Squeeze Light? Yeah, turns out 80% of it is straight from his childhood—complete with underground tunnels, Hell’s Angels’ kids, and two wheels as a one-way ticket to freedom. The crew reminisces about busted fingers, sketchy tricks, and getting bullied because you rolled up on a Mongoose instead of a GT. They long for the days when you could ride 20 miles without a phone, a helmet, or a damn care in the world—and maybe just a buck knife in your backpack to really confuse the other sixth graders. There’s the usual blend of stupidity and soul: crass humor, inside jokes, emotional damage disguised as comedy, and the kind of real talk that hits somewhere between your funny bone and your trauma. Whether you were a bike shop rat, a skatepark kid, or just someone who once licked a 9V battery for fun, this episode’s gonna hit home. Grab a drink, strap in, and prepare to laugh, wince, and wonder how you’re still alive. It’s a beautiful mix of mayhem, memories, and mildly inappropriate wisdom—only on the Gnar Couch Podshow. Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

Alright, strap in Gnards, ‘cause you’re tuning into another idiotic episode of the Gnar Couch Podshow. Today, we’re talking to “NRML MTB'er” — who, spoiler alert, is anything but normal. We’ve got Boston Rob, JP/Uncle Touche, Sebastian the wildcard guest, Chief, and Jimmy Sniper gearing up to take you on a deranged journey through mountain biking's less-traveled trails. After Rob morphs into his alter ego, DJ Fred when he plays our newest trap intro song—Canyon Kings—we talk collaborations with OnlyFans creators and reporter nerds going OTB on urban Frisco trails. NRML tells us about blasting bikes with every gun imaginable and we engage in some intense debates over which country deserves a mock nuclear winter. It’s all the usual dumb humor with a side of stupid. Pack your sense of humor. Or don't, and cancel all of us. Whatever. We'll come back like cockroaches. Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

Strap in and hold on tight 'cause you're back with the Gnar Couch Podshow, the only show more unhinged than your grandma’s teeth. This week, JP a.k.a. Uncle Touche, Boston Rob, Cheef, and Jimmy Sniper, are cranking one out with the Colorado Kid, a former engineer turned MTB jokester. We’re kicking things off with a wild guess-who of the non-existent Russian hockey legend, Aleksander Rubonov, then veering straight into the absurdity of “front butts”—and yeah, it's exactly what it sounds like. Colorado Kid's here to spill the beans on ditching spreadsheets for spit-takes, proving life’s too short for a real job. It’s all unscripted, unhinged, and unbelievable. Let’s get this dumpster fire burning! Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

After 10 long months of diaper blowouts and sleep deprivation, Cheef has returned from spawning his future giga-Chad son, and the Four Horsemen of the MTB Apocalypse are back to offend 90% of the MTB world while whispering sweet, honey-soaked nonsense into the ears of the remaining 10%. This week, Rampage rider and all-around dirt wizard Luke Whitlock joins the shitshow to talk about carving out unique trails, sending it at Rampage, harnessing the power of low-voltage electricity, and balancing it all with his strong Christian faith (which we definitely need more of around here, especially Rob). On a serious note, our friend Kevin Boyer—TRP Brakes’ US OE Sales Manager and certified badass—was in a horrific snowboarding accident on March 7th, leaving him with no feeling or movement in his lower legs. A GoFundMe has been set up to help with his medical bills, rehab, home and vehicle modifications, and living expenses during his recovery. If you can donate, PLEASE do—it’s the least we can do for a guy who’s done so much for the MTB community. On a much less serious note, we discuss the deeply troubling rise of bike parks closing in favor of pickleball courts, and the possible impact this will have on JP’s life as a GILF hunter. Plus, we dive into way more dumb shit, including but not limited to: country-rap fusion, BDSM uses for dropper posts, and another Baiku truth bomb from Jimmy. Tune in, or don’t—we’re still gonna do this either way. Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

Boy, oh boy. What a great mountain bike podcast we have for you this week. We discuss everything you need to know about buying your next bike, including: Rob's shitgasm, a very strange phenomenon where Boston Rob tried to push out a fart when he was 12 and ended up also having his first orgasm, Cheef's closeted desire to be a gay lumberjack (according to the listeners), JP's frustration with cuntstomer service nowadays, a new bit that we can't do right because Cheef didn't explain it very well, and Jimmy's baiku. 

In this episode of the Gnar Couch Podshow, hosts Chief, JP/Uncle Touche, Boston Rob, and Jimmy Sniper are joined by renowned bike designer Chris Canfield. We dive into Chris’s extensive experience and involvement with multiple bike brands, including Revel, Canfield, Flow Bikes, and his new venture, Vampire. Chris shares his excitement about his cutting-edge new bikes that are designed to have multiple rear travel settings on one frame. The conversation covers the technical intricacies of various bike suspension designs, the importance of on-site quality control in Taiwan, and the skills required for precise hand-welding in bike manufacturing. Chris also discusses the adaptability of bike designs, from narrow pedals for rocky terrains to customizable features like the "flip chip" for MX or full 29 configurations. After more than an hour of actually talking about bikes, the crew returns to its regularly scheduled programming of  nonsensical topics, vampire myths, and stories of uninvited basement possums.  Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".

Welcome back to the greatest MTB podcast on earth, the Gnar Couch Podshow. It's been six long months since Cheef's baby was bornt, and now he's ready to neglect his family again to head up this idiotic mess. In this episode, your favorite mediocre mountain bikers who never talk about mountain biking--Jimmy Sniper, Cheef, Boston Rob, and JP/Uncle Touche--drag you through a mess of nonsense, including discussions about front boofing ZYN and previously unconsidered places to stash bike tools, Cheef's encounters with a bug-eyed, big-headed kid named Nigel, Rob (who is Jewish) dropping his kids off at something he calls "Jew Camp," Cheef's caffeine-induced high blood pressure, and Rob's Creed tribute to the show. We've hardly been riding bikes, so we hardly talk about them. The Oral Connections Line is hot with callers this week, including Reamo Piehole, Dean the XC Nerd, WienerMaster, and more, all of whom add to the spirit of the show with intelligent and interesting content. We can't leave out the heartfelt thanks to our Patreon supporters because, let's face it, you people bankroll this circus. Help us pay for the few things we need to keep this running for as low as $4.20/month. Big ups to Bliz Eyewear for being down since nearly day one. Save 30% using the code "sponchesmom" at checkout.