Claim OwnershipMeet the Rockadopoleis!: Sex, Love, and Power
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© 2024 Meet the Rockadopoleis!: Sex, Love, and Power
Description
This podcast is about the complex dynamics between sex, love, and power. We explore art, literature, theory, and philosophy, often in the context of our own BDSM-based female-led relationship. The show is for adults only. We're a Femdom couple, and we often talk about our physical relationship in explicit terms. That said, we're not here to tell you what to do or how to do it. We are here because we enjoy thinking and talking about art and ideas, especially when they pertain to our own strange and wonderful lifestyle.
133 Episodes
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This episode is Part I of a two-part episode on findom, in which we provide a general introduction to the topic and discuss the appeal of this controversial and very expensive kink. Episode Art: Armada Portrait of Elizabeth I of England [detail], attributed to George Gowry, 1588Support the show
In this episode we discuss our experiences with Prodommes, and the extent to which the they can reasonably be considered to be professionals.Episode Art: Unknown Woman, Artist: Lavinia Fontana, c. 1600Support the show
In this episode we discuss an official anti-misogynistic scolding from Sadiq Khan, the current Mayor of the City of London, England.Episode Art: Lord Mayor of London Sir William Craven, Marcus Gheeraeerts II, 1610Support the show
This episode is the first of a two-part episode about the kinkification of misogyny.Support the show
In this episode, we discuss respectability politics and the Leather Community. Episode Art: Mister Leatherman Italia, Artist: Josie Fraser, 2019Support the show
This episode uexplores the evolution of academic perspectives on BDSM over the past 50 years or so. From sociology to psychology and anthropology, we explore academic interest in BDSM. Episode Art: Detail of The Humanist Library of Sélestat in France, Photographer: Claude Truong-Ngoc, date unavailableSupport the show
In this episode we dicuss four practices that define kink and the kink world; power exchange, sadomasochism, bondage and role play. Episode Art: Actors Before Hamlet, Wladyslaw Czachorski, 1873Support the show
This is the first of a two-part discussion in which we discuss the extent to which the kink world attempts to achieve respectability by accommodating vanilla norms and customs. Episode Art: John The Baptist, Caravaggio, 1604Support the show
In this episode we'll discuss our theme for this season which is the politics of kink and BDSM. Episode Art: The President's House, George Munger, 1814-1815Support the show
In this episode we discuss our favorite parts of Season V. Episode Art: Fredrick, Frieseke, 1911Support the show
In this episode, we discuss a variety of fictional and real-life sexual utopias. Episode Art: Oneida Offspring, 1898, Artist UnknownSupport the show
In this episode, we riff off of Part IV of the book More Than Two.Episode Art: Antoni and Eliza Radziwill, c. 1820, Artist UnknownSupport the show
In this episode we discuss Part 3 in More Than Two, focusing on differences between power dynamics in polyamory and our 24/7 TPE dynamic. Episode Art: Louis XIV, Hyacinth Rigaud, 1701Support the show
In this episode, we discuss the book The Leather Couch, by the kink positive sex therapist Stefani Goerlich. Episode Art: Portrait of Riri [detail], Guiseppi Amisani, 1900Support the show
In this episode, we discuss our experiences at a local Femdom event.Episode Art: No Title, Dorothea Lange, 1939, Yale/Library of CongressSupport the show
In this episode, we discuss Jislaaik's penchant for breaking rules. Episode Art: Isabella Stewart Gardner in Venice, Anders Zorn, 1894Support the show
In this episode, we discuss the uses of nakedness in our power exchange dynamic. Episode Art: Study of a Nude Man, Gustave Corbet, c. 1840sSupport the show
In this episode we discuss a variety of relationship tools that could be useful to both polyamorists and polyandrists. Episode Art: Bacchus [detail], Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio, 1596Support the show
In this episode, we discuss the extent to which we can adapt ideas and strategies from the world of polyamory to our future polyandrous relationships. Episode Art: Polyamory Symbol, Artist: Opensofia, Wikimedia CommonsSupport the show
In this episode with continue our discussion of developing world views. Episode Art: Drawing of Sigmund Freud, artist unknownSupport the show
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The belief that women cry to manipulate men is an old sexist trope.
Lance said it hurt, but did you stretch yourself out before going there? You can't go all tight to this sort of stuff.
There are indeed more femdoms out there than we think. They're just not into BDSM. They're run of the mill women. Another issue is that male subs approach courtship from the perspective of what he wants the femdom to do to him, instead of offering himself to her and making her see what's in it for her.
Domineering speech in vanilla context doesn't work because there has to be congruence between what the person is saying and their body language. A domineering person, not a dominant in the kink sense, is domineering because they lack power and need to overcompensate with domineering posturing. Thus, they are saying something, but their body is sending the opposite signal.
My sub and I went to DomCon this year, and I'm sure you guys saw us. We're really hard to miss. I think there were few lifestyle femdoms because DomCon is really not worth it if you don't live in LA. The workshops are okay, but it is the socials that are the best part, and pro-Dommes use them to network. Plus, like with everything else, male doms overtake the space, and that's a turn off for a lot of lifestyle Dommes. It was for me. It's like those straight guys who force their way into lesbian communities and bars. Ugh. Another thing with pro-Dommes is that many women interested in lifestyle domination are turned off by male subs who make it all about themselves. This has happened to me a lot. I've thought of giving it up a few times. And that is why there are so many pro-Dommes who fake it, really. They aren't true Dommes. It's a performance for them.
In my research on BDSM, I found that the Middle East is the first or second region with the most internet searches for "femdom." Arab femdom and other Arab-women dominanation categories dominate Clips4Sale.
If kink becomes mainstream, it stops being kink. Taboo is essential for something to be a kink or fetish.
I've encountered more liberal people in kink. It could be the type of groups I gravitate towards and the people I attract, as a Domme of color. I am very direct on my profiles. One thing I don't do is hang around male doms. I just don't like it. Maybe that's why I'm not seeing all the conservatives. However, I have seen male subs who are conservative and definitely not socially liberal. And these, the socially conservative ones, are driven to submission because they feel like they'll be accepted by a Domme for not being masculine enough. That's a turnoff for me.
Twitter is filled with a bunch of authoritians. These ironic postmoderns claim to support radical self-definition, but only that of which they approve. Foucault is turning in his grave.
I'm an anthropologist, and I can tell you the ideas that women want powerful men to dominate them and provide for them and want less sexual partners, while men are wired to bang their way through life are the outdated ideas of Western white men in anthropology. These ideas are also fed back to us from evolutionary biology, which is similarly dominated by the wet dreams of Western white men. BTW, the femdoms I've met who are anti-feminists tend not to be college educated and aren't well versed in critical theory. They don't do any intellectualizing of what they do.
As for matriarchy, there never was, based on the archeological record so far, a female counterpart to patriarchy. There were, however, societies that were women-centered yet egalitarian. They practiced goddess worship, and women had important leadership roles.
Interesting that Lance calls himself a slave and masochist. Masochists are not submissive. They're in power and direct play through manipulation.