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Monday Morning Podcast
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Monday Morning Podcast

Author: All Things Comedy

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Bill Burr rants about relationship advice, sports and the Illuminati.

1329 Episodes
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Bill rambles with drummer Dave Elitch (Weezer, The Mars Volta) about his new program for drummers 'Your Mind's Ear' available now at www.DaveElitch.com  (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (32:47) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 10-9-17- Bill rambles about the Swamp, Rosie the Riveter, and the Coast Guard. (01:58:20) - Anything Better Podcast - NFL Week 6 Preview with Paul Virzi - Bill rescues his record a bit by going 3-1 and Paul does the unthinkable and goes 0-4.  Both their records sit at 5-14-1 through the first 5 weeks. SimpliSafe:  Go to www.SimpliSafe.com/BURR to claim 50% off a new system. Squarespace:  Check out www.SquareSpace.com/BURR for a free trial with the code BURR to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Hims:  To get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit www.Hims.com/BURR 
Bill rambles about the Patriots, old photos, and space exploration. Quo:  Go to Quo dot com slash burr to get started with a free trial and get 20% off your first six months at www.Quo.com/BURR ZipRecruiter:  Try Zip Recruiter for free at www.ZipRecruiter.com/BURR Helix:  Go to www.ZipRecruiter.com/BURR 27% Off Sitewide Exclusive my listeners
Bill rambles about water in the basement, diving on the ground, and going to the Doctors. (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (28:14) -Thursday Afternoon Throwback 10-2-25 - Bill rambles about the Fall, the Sun Belt Conference, and fatties. (01:41:35) - Anything Better Podcast - NFL Week 5 Preview with Paul Virzi.  Paul has a redemption week going 3-1.  Bill has brought his win column up to 2 for the year.  Mizzen and Main: Right now, Mizzen & Main is offering our listeners 20% off your first purchase at mizzenandmain.com, promo code BURR20. 
Bill rambles about football Sunday, performing in the Middle East, and project Blue Beam SimpliSafe:  Go to www.SimpliSafe.com/BURR to claim 50% off a new system. Quo:  Go to www.Quo.com/burr to get started with a free trial and get 20% off your first six months.  Cash App:  Just download Cash App, use our exclusive referral code CASHAPP10 in your profile, send $5 to a friend within 14 days, and you’ll get $10 dropped right into your account. 
Bill rambles about NFL games, War of the Worlds, and Grateful Dead bootlegs. Squarespace:  Check out www.SquareSpace.com/BURR for a free trial with the code BURR to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Mizzen and Main: Right now, Mizzen & Main is offering our listeners 20% off your first purchase at www.MizzenandMain.com promo code BURR20. Quo:  Join over 90,000 businesses already using Quo, formerly Openphone, to stay ahead.Go to www.Quo.com/burr to get started with a free trial and get 20% off your first six months. 
Bill rambles with comedian Nate Craig about middle acts, being a dad, and his new special.   Check out Nate's special here: https://youtu.be/1ViHeQFpqf0?si=UKYkUBE6_LMq-qHJ (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (01:09:35) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 9-18-17 - Bill rambles about no booze, making an ass of himself at a party, and the Stub Hub Cent-AHH! (02:15:14) - Anything Better Podcast - NFL Week 3 Preview with Paul Virzi.  Bill did it again going 0-4, while Paul scratched out a 2-2 week. They also talk about Paul attending a Broadway play and the loyalty of dogs. TRUEWERK:  Upgrade your day with workwear built like it matters. Get 15% off your first order at www.TRUEWERK.com with code BURR
Bill rambles about getting fresh air, the internet, and wedding disclaimers. 120Life:  For a limited time, try 120Life and save 20% off. Just use the code BURR at checkout at www.120Life.com  Hims:  Get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit www.Hims.com/BURR  SimpliSafe: Get a 60-day money-back guarantee and no long-term contracts, SimpliSafe earns your business by keeping you safe and satisfied every day.  Go to www.SimpliSafe.com/BURR to claim 50% off a new system.
Bill rambles about the Criterion Collection films, his new car, and television. (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (30:21) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 9-11-17 Bill rambles about the South, undefeated seasons, and the Russians. (01:34:53) - Anything Better Podcast - Week 2!  The fellas both went 0-4, but they hit on the Monday Night Special.   Squarespace: Check out www.Squarespace.com/BURR for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, use BURR to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. BetMGMG: *First Bet Offer $1500*1. Download the BetMGM Sportsbook app on iOS or Android, or visit betmgm.com.  Use the promo code BURR2. Sign up and deposit at least ten dollars ($10.00) into your BetMGM Sportsbook account.3. Place your first wager and receive up to $1,500 back in Bonus Bets if the bet loses.4. If the bet does lose, your Bonus Bets will be available once your initial wager is settled. *First Touchdown*Place a pre-game, straight First Touchdown Scorer bet in any NFL game.If your player scores the first touchdown in the game, win your wager as normal. If your player scores the second touchdown in the game, you’ll get your stake back in cash. (Only straight bets apply to Second Chance. Any wager using a bonus bet, bonus or other reward token is ineligible for the campaign.) Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER (Available in the US). Call 877-8-HOPENY or text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Call 1-800-NEXT-STEP (AZ), 1-800-327-5050 (MA), 1-800-BETS-OFF (IA), 1-800-981-0023 (PR). First Bet Offer for new customers only. Subject to eligibility requirements. Rewards are non-withdrawable bonus bets that expire in 7 days. In partnership with Kansas Crossing Casino and Hotel. See BetMGM.com for Terms. 21+ only. US promotional offers not available in New York, Nevada, Ontario, or Puerto Rico.
Bill rambles about seeing Oasis at the Rose Bowl, potential dystopian futures, and electronic menu ordering. ZipRecruiter:  Use ZipRecruiter, and save time hiring.  Go to www.ZipRecruiter.com/BURR to try for free. OpenPhone:  Go to www.OpenPhone.com/BURR and get 20% off your first six months. 
Bill rambles about dodging questions, finding answers, and the NFL. (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (32:03) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback - 9-4-17 - Bill rambles about Europe's little counties, Force India, and no boozin' there. (01:32:20) - Anything Better Podcast - The boys are back!  Bill and Paul return to make their picks and break down the games of the week.  They also discuss where to be homeless, temptations in Rio, and the Quarterback's happy wife. Fast Growing Trees:  This Fall, they have the best deals for your yard, up to half off on select plants and other deals. And listeners to our show get 15% off their first purchase when using the code BURR at checkout.
Bill rambles about the internet, football, and hard drugs. Helix:  Go to www.helixsleep.com/burr 27% Off Sitewide  SimpliSafe:  Visit www.SimpliSafe.com/BURR to claim 50% off a new system.
Bill rambles about crosswalks, weighted vests, and back-up noises. (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (29:47) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 8-28-17 - Bill rambles about Make A Wish, Booze Batting Lineups, and free T-shirts. Thursday Afternoon Interlude:  Kava Kon - Zero Gravity Lounge Hims:  To get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit www.Hims.com/BURR 
Bill rambles about summer for kids, tambourines at concerts, and classic car owners. Guy With 1,000 Cars: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rD2dkpTD4Eo SimpliSafe:  Visit www.SimpliSafe.com/BURR to claim 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and get your first month free. SquareSpace:  Check out www.squarespace.com/BURR for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, use OFFER CODE: (BURR) to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
Bill rambles with comedian and writer Carol Leifer about her new book 'How To Write A Funny Speech', Seinfeld, and cruise line shows. (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast(59:11) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 8-21-25 Bill rambles about gambling on baseball, Adam and Eve, and snooping. Thursday Afternoon Interlude:  Greyboy - Ruffneck Jazz
Bill rambles about throwing little-people, the Television Hall of Fame, and Instagram location settings. Open Phone: Go to www.OpenPhone.com/BURR and get 20% off your first six months. You can even bring your existing number with you for free.
Bill rambles about Y: The Last Man, Rubberneckers, and making popcorn. (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (27:53) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 8-14-17 - Bill rambles about luxury apartments, the Jersey Shore, and being a hypocrite. Thursday Afternoon Interlude: INXS - Disappear  Dupe: Just type D-U-P-E dot com forward slash before any product url in your browser and BOOM - it instantly finds you less expensive alternatives.  MeUndies: Right now as a listener of my show, you can score sizzling summer deals like up to 50% off at https://www.MeUndies.com/burr and enter promo code BURR.
Bill rambles about squats, driverless cars, and toothpaste deliveries. SimpliSafe:  Visit www.SimpliSafe.com/burr to claim 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and get your first month free. Squarespace:  Check out www.Squarespace.com/BURR for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, use code BURR to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
Bill rambles about roasting a legend, playing with Primus, and coffee chains. (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (31:51) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback 8-7-17 - Bill rambles about the New York Times Crossword puzzle, taking a bath, and saying Nuke-You-Lar.  Thursday Afternoon Interlude:  Kay Kaiser (Harry Babbit & Ginny Simms) - Chatterbox Lucyd: Upgrade your eyewear, head to www.Lucyd.co and use code BURR for 20% off Hims: To get simple, online access to personalized, affordable care for ED, Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit www.Hims.com.BURR 
Bill rambles about 'driving an iPad', seeing the sights, and facial recognition. ZipRecruiter:  Try for free at www.ZipRecruiter.com/BURR  Helix:  Go to www.HelixSleep.com/BURR for 20% off site wide.
Bill rambles about daddy daughter day, the war grift, and saxophone sex scenes. (00:00) - Thursday Afternoon Podcast (30:48) - Thursday Afternoon Throwback - 7-31-17 - Bill rambles about heat waves, ole fatty cakes, and MLB. Thursday Afternoon Interlude: Chuck Mangione - Feels So Good 
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Comments (1835)

Gala la

hypocrital sellout

Oct 7th
Reply

nick tarrabain

Old Billy Bloodmoney

Oct 5th
Reply

secret

see ya later, Billy Baghdad. You let a lot of us down with taking the Riyadh money.

Oct 3rd
Reply

Alex Oliveira

I can't listen to or support anyone who took Saudi money. Goodbye.

Sep 30th
Reply

secret

I always love it when Nia shows up! Hearing her and Bill together is just so sweet. Him making her laugh at all the ad reads had me dying!

Sep 20th
Reply

Stu Pidasso

Thank you for getting Ready pernub stuck in my head forever

Aug 18th
Reply

d s

We have to put bill in noisy and busy environments more often. This is gold

Aug 11th
Reply

Michelle Rodrigue

I am literally the hot chick with a sleeve tattoo who is great at pool. Thanks for the unintended shout-out!

Aug 5th
Reply

Mohammad K

U laugh like a cat with a ball of hair stock in his throat

Jul 10th
Reply

Stu Pidasso

Take the key fob out of your back pocket.

Jul 1st
Reply

J Bonham

Such a funny cunt

Jun 29th
Reply

YourFavoriteRant

you had me at burned bacon.

Jun 7th
Reply

Sal DeTraglia

grolp

May 23rd
Reply

Tim Brockert

bad art is good art! & Green Bay is a small town team like buffalo, the NFL just doesn't like that it's not One owner to convince.

May 16th
Reply

Tim Brockert

strange brew

May 6th
Reply

Inderpal Singh Assi

I agree with Bill 100% with the whole Patrice comments. Everyone talks about Patrice as 1) They knew him, when in fact they only knew him as a comedian, 2) As he would be a "warrior" against the SJW like papa Rogan and his Toerogan click.

Apr 26th
Reply

kenzievii

best advice ever

Apr 18th
Reply

kenzievii

this was hilarious 😂 great job reading those ads tho lollol lol #heyBill

Apr 18th
Reply

Emilio Dijan

Dean has almost identical voice as Jim Norton

Apr 14th
Reply

Inderpal Singh Assi

"sorry phone, I'm not mad at you" 🤣

Apr 8th
Reply