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This podcast is for anyone who wants to overcome pornography for good. It will teach you about your brain and how to completely quit a pornography habit, 100% shame-free. If your ideal life doesn't include a porn habit, then this is the show for you.
Visit sarabrewer.com to learn more about overcoming pornography for good.
Visit sarabrewer.com to learn more about overcoming pornography for good.
249 Episodes
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Have you ever felt overwhelmed by your emotions, like anger, anxiety, or sadness? We all experience powerful emotions, but the difference between getting stuck and moving forward often comes down to one skill: emotional agility. In this episode, coach Hunter dives into the concept of emotional agility and why it’s such a crucial tool for overcoming pornography. You’ll discover a simple, four-step process to help you build emotional agility. Hunter also shares why emotional agility doesn’t mean suppressing emotions, but learning to navigate them in a way that allows you to respond thoughtfully, rather than react impulsively. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/emotional-agility-hunterClick here to sign up for my free masterclass, How to Overcome Pornography without using Willpower: https://sarabrewer.com/masterclass
Have you ever wondered why your thoughts about yourself or pornography feel so automatic and unchangeable? So often we treat beliefs like facts, but many of the things we tell ourselves repeatedly are just thoughts we’ve rehearsed until they feel true. Learning to separate facts from beliefs is the first step in taking control of your mind and your habits. In this episode, I’m revisiting the beliefs and identity milestone, where we spend the most coaching time in the program. We focus on how repeated thoughts shape the beliefs you hold about yourself and pornography. By noticing these beliefs, questioning them, and identifying evidence that contradicts them, you can begin to shift how you think about yourself and your actions. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/changing-beliefs-identityClick here to sign up for my free masterclass, How to Overcome Pornography without using Willpower: https://sarabrewer.com/masterclass
Have you noticed that trying to be “Mr. Nice Guy” or constantly people-pleasing can actually keep you stuck? On the surface, it may look like kindness or keeping the peace, but prioritizing others’ approval over your own needs often leads to resentment, disconnection, and the very behaviors you’re trying to overcome. In this episode, Coach Jessica explores how people-pleasing creates a cycle of self-abandonment disguised as kindness. She shares how to stop managing other people’s feelings, allow for discomfort in relationships, and engage in real, honest conversations that deepen connection. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/mr-nice-guy-stuck-jessicaClick here to sign up for my free masterclass, How to Overcome Pornography without using Willpower: https://sarabrewer.com/masterclass
Do you find yourself believing every thought your brain throws at you? Our brains are wired to keep us safe, which often means defaulting to negativity and imagining worst-case scenarios. These patterns can create shame, frustration, and old habits that keep us stuck, including patterns around pornography use.In this episode, I explore how you can step back and observe your thoughts instead of automatically identifying with them. Thoughts aren’t facts, and simply noticing them can release the pressure, fear, and self-criticism that so often hold us back. I walk you through practical ways to practice being the observer each day, guiding your human body with care, and letting love, rather than judgment, direct your decisions. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/observer-you-not-your-thoughts
Do you find yourself stuck in a cycle of self-judgment, especially when dealing with pornography struggles? That critical voice in your head can feel like an unrelenting force, weakening you both mentally and physically. The longer this judgment lingers, the more it blocks your energy and affects everything from your stress response to your ability to sleep. In this episode, Coach Kat dives into how self-judgment creates a toxic cycle of anger, disappointment, and resentment, mirroring the shame cycle many face. Kat explores how this judgment manifests physically, causing your body to become constricted and stuck. She explains why forgiveness is the key to healing your self-judgmental voice and how it opens up space for peace, trust, and emotional freedom.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/healing-self-judgemental-voice-kat
Have you ever wondered why all your hard work to overcome pornography still leaves you stuck in the same patterns? Many people are primarily focusing on filters, routines, or counting days. They work hard, follow all the steps, and still find themselves stuck in the same patterns, wondering why their efforts aren’t paying off. In this episode, Coach Hunter explains why all of that misses the point. You’ll learn how to rebuild self-trust through small promises, why it’s critical to live from your future identity instead of your past, and how training your mindset like an elite athlete can change everything. Hunter shares practical strategies for moving from fear-based thinking to confidence-driven action so you can walk into each day knowing you are built to win.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/rebuilding-mindset-confidence-hunter
Setting boundaries can feel challenging, especially when it involves people you care about—whether it’s a spouse, family, friends, or religious leaders. In this episode, we revisit an important discussion about setting healthy boundaries while overcoming pornography. Transparency is crucial in building trust, especially with your spouse, but it’s equally important to protect your emotional and spiritual well-being. In this episode, we discuss how to draw the line between honesty and self-protection, how to set boundaries that nurture your recovery, and why spiritual maturity is essential for maintaining healthy relationships. You'll hear practical advice on how to handle disclosure conversations, manage well-meaning but challenging check-ins, and establish healthy boundaries in every aspect of your life.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/boundaries-loved-ones-religious-leaders
Have you ever wanted to get to know the coaches behind the Overcome Pornography for Good program? In this special Meet the Coaches episode, Jessica Farmer, Kat Jenkins, and Mimi Porter share how their unique journeys shaped the ways they guide clients toward real, lasting change. Listen as the three coaches share insights from their personal experiences and show why different coaching styles matter, how the right fit can accelerate progress, and what it truly means to believe in someone’s ability to change before they believe it themselves. Through their stories, you’ll see how creativity, curiosity, and the creation of a safe space help clients navigate pornography struggles. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/lessons-coaches-jess-kat-mimi
Do you feel like you're stuck in a cycle? The journey of overcoming pornography is often marked by repeating patterns that feel impossible to break. It can feel like falling into the same hole over and over again—lost, helpless, and unsure how to get out. In this episode, Coach Kat shares a powerful metaphor about breaking free from unwanted habits. It illustrates how we move through stages of awareness and responsibility, from feeling stuck in familiar cycles to finally choosing new paths. Understanding these stages can help you see that change isn’t instant, but a gradual progression towards freedom.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/hole-choosing-new-path-kat
Dating while working through pornography struggles can feel heavy and complicated. From fear of judgment to uncertainty about disclosure, it’s easy to get stuck wondering if you should even be dating at all. In this episode, Coach Jessica Farmer talks about navigating dating while overcoming pornography use. She shares guidance on managing vulnerability, handling intense emotions, assessing your readiness for dating, and why putting life on hold might actually hold you back. Jessica reframes difficult conversations—not as confessions, but as opportunities for collaboration and building authentic connection.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/dating-overcoming-pornography-jessica
Do you ever feel like you're caught between believing you're either a good person or a bad person? This kind of black-and-white thinking can lead to frustration, especially when trying to change unwanted behaviors. The truth is, we all embody both positive and negative qualities—this duality is a part of being human. In this episode, I explore how embracing this dual nature is key to creating lasting change. Trying to label ourselves as entirely good or bad creates unnecessary resistance, especially when we face challenges. Instead, accepting that we're both gives us the freedom to be honest with ourselves and move forward without shame or self-pity.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/living-duality-good-bad
Do you ever find yourself stuck in a cycle of negative thoughts that feel impossible to break? It’s easy to get caught up in self-doubt, frustration, or fear, believing those thoughts as truths. But what if, in that moment, you could choose a different path? In today’s episode, I’m revisiting the Choose Again Method, a simple and powerful technique to help you shift negative thinking and build a more positive mindset. This method is based on the idea that we don’t have to accept every thought that crosses our minds. The Choose Again Method involves three simple steps that help you choose a thought that feels better. It’s not about ignoring difficult emotions or forcing yourself into positivity; it’s about taking intentional steps to shift your thinking in a way that aligns with what you truly want. This method has been a game-changer for so many of my clients, and it can be just as impactful for you. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/choose-again-shifting-negative-thoughts
When your emotions feel like they're spiraling out of control, your body already knows what to do. In this episode, coach Kat Jenkins introduces a powerful hands-on technique called Jin Shin Jyutsu finger holds. This grounding practice assigns each finger to a specific emotion. Through this guided practice, you'll discover how to use your own hands as tools for emotional regulation. Kat walks you through each finger hold step-by-step, explaining not just the technique but the deeper connections to your body's energy systems. You'll learn to recognize which emotions need attention and how to address them directly through this simple yet profound practice that you can use anywhere, anytime you need grounding.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/processing-emotions-jin-shin-jyutsu
Do you ever feel like you should be further along in overcoming pornography? Despite knowing the tools, listening to the podcasts, and doing the work, something still feels off. It’s a common frustration that often leads to the belief that either you’re not trying hard enough or the tools aren’t working for you. In this episode, Coach Hunter addresses this struggle by revealing a crucial shift in perspective. The issue isn’t that you need more tools or that you need to work harder; it’s that you haven’t fully understood where you are right now. Shifting from “doing more” to “understanding where you are” is the key to moving forward with confidence.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/recognizing-progress-feel-stuck-hunter
Is watching porn considered cheating? It’s a question many people wrestle with, and the answer isn’t black and white. In this episode, I explore the emotional complexities surrounding pornography use in committed relationships and how it intersects with infidelity, betrayal, and sexual boundaries. I dive into how personal values, inherited beliefs, and unspoken agreements shape how we view fidelity. I discuss how infidelity isn’t defined by specific actions, but rather by breaking agreements and trust. Through this conversation, you’ll gain insights on navigating difficult conversations, co-creating agreements with your partner, and understanding the role of shame and fear in shaping sexual beliefs. If you’re struggling with porn use or your partner’s, this episode provides a roadmap for moving forward with clarity and compassion.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/watching-porn-considered-cheating
Have you ever felt sadness or confusion about letting go of something you desperately want out of your life? The grieving process often shows up in unexpected ways when you're trying to overcome pornography. It’s normal to experience complex emotions like grief, even when you know you want to quit. Understanding this emotional landscape can significantly transform your healing journey. In this episode, Coach Jessica explores the three key areas where grief shows up while overcoming pornography. She discusses how letting go of porn as a coping mechanism creates a real sense of loss, even when your mind wants it gone. Using the five stages of grief—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—Jessica provides practical strategies for processing these emotions. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/grieving-loss-jessica
If you’ve mastered your morning routine and crushed your gym goals, but still feel stuck when it comes to showing up in your relationships or handling hard emotions, you’re not alone. Discipline without emotional intelligence turns into control, not connection—and this is the key piece that so many self-development approaches miss. You can do everything “right” on paper and still find yourself disconnected, reactive, or avoiding emotional discomfort.In this episode, I’m diving into why empathy might be the most undertrained skill in personal development, especially for men. If you’ve been missing this piece, this episode will help you reconnect—with yourself, your values, and the people you love.Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/missing-from-self-development-world
Do you ever feel like you're one stress away from losing control? That could mean you're outside your window of tolerance—a state where your emotional balance is compromised.In this episode, Coach Hunter explains a powerful framework for understanding emotional regulation, using the metaphor of a rubber band to illustrate how our nervous system reacts to stress and why we sometimes turn to coping mechanisms, like pornography, when overwhelmed. You'll hear practical tools to return to your green zone and how to process emotions in a healthy way. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/window-tolerance-hunter If you’re ready to do this work and start practicing unconditional commitment towards quitting your porn habit, sign up to work with Sara: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme
Is censorship effective for pornography? While banning pornography might seem like a protective measure, it often backfires and creates more harm than good. In this episode, I explore how censorship, even with the best intentions, escalates the problems it aims to solve.Learn why censorship isn’t real protection, how it can increase division and control, and what strategies actually protect kids while respecting adult freedom. You’ll feel empowered, knowing how to make a real difference without unintentionally causing harm, because true safety comes from education and guidance, not control. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/censorship-protection-bans If you’re ready to do this work and start practicing unconditional commitment towards quitting your porn habit, sign up to work with Sara: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme
Do intrusive thoughts create distress for you, especially when they involve sexuality? Through my work helping people overcome pornography, I've noticed how these unwanted thoughts often trigger shame, anxiety, and a desperate desire to make them stop. In this episode, I share a powerful exercise about a pink elephant that perfectly illustrates why fighting against intrusive thoughts only makes them stronger. I demonstrate how we can learn to let intrusive thoughts exist without engaging with them, ultimately allowing them to fade naturally into the background. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://centerforovercoming.com/post/intrusive-thoughts If you’re ready to do this work and start practicing unconditional commitment towards quitting your porn habit, sign up to work with Sara: https://www.sarabrewer.com/workwithme
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It is incredible to try to look at a problem at many different aspects this approach will undoubtedly be successful.
Amazing show
Escapism is half the problem. Escapism occurs because people are exposed to existential problem and escapism to pornography become an existential solution. What we want to do is redirect one’s existential solution from phonographic to Jesus. But for those suffering from the triggers of their mind focusing on pornography, how does it feel to focus on Jesus in the presence of your triggers? The breasts of a woman on TikTok triggers you and you intentionally then focus on Jesus in the presence of those breasts/ cleavages. I tell you the truth, it is very difficult for lust to easily conquer you with a persistent focus-exposure to the existential solution that is called “Jesus”.