Thriving Adoptees - Let's Thrive

How do we enable ourselves and others to thrive? Big question! Listen in as Damon shares what helps him thrive and empower his colleagues, foster youth clients and others to do the same.One Hope United (OHU) is a nonprofit organization that has been serving children, youth, and families for 130 years. We provide early childhood education, child and family services, behavioral and mental health resources, and residential programs, reaching more than 10,000 children and families each year across Illinois and Florida. Through our evidence-based and trauma-informed practices, we empower children and families to see and create a future where, regardless of their past, they can reach their full potential.www.onehopeunited.orgwww.facebook.com/1hopeunitedwww.instagram.com/onehopeunitedwww.linkedin.com/company/one-hope-unitedwww.linkedin.com/in/damon-cates-53945a2bwww.x.com/1hopeunitedwww.youtube.com/@1hopeunited Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Raising adopted kids isn't about fixing them, it's about growing us. Doing Our Own Work is one of those themes that comes up again and again on Thriving Adoptees. Listen in as mom of 4 girls - 2 through adoption - Laura shares her learnings on empathy, shaming, relational loss and more.Laura Adams is a visionary educator, speaker, and systems-change advocate focused on strengthening how schools and communities support children in adoptive, foster, and kinship families.As the Founder and President of iCARE4 Adoptive And Foster Families, Laura leads statewide and national efforts to bring practical, healing-centered tools and training to educators, mental health professionals, and child welfare leaders. Her work helps teams build emotionally safe, regulation-ready environments where all children can grow and thrive..Laura created the iCARE4 Schools Connection Kits™, bilingual, tiered tools now used in more than 1,200 Illinois schools to support identity development, emotional regulation, and school success for students with complex life stories..Her signature training series, Connected, We Thrive™, delivers engaging, evidence-informed professional development aligned with Illinois Professional Learning Standards, MTSS, and SEL frameworks. These sessions equip school teams, social workers, and caregivers with practical, healing-centered strategies and a shared language to support student well-being..Laura actively collaborates with leaders across education, mental health, and child welfare to advance responsive, family-centered practices. Her partners include: DCFS, ISBE, IAAC, IPA, IASB, IASSW, SWFCAC, West40, Let It Be Us, School of Hope, Second Nurture, NTI/C.A.S.E., ICOY, FREDLA, NCFA, ROEs, the Beacon Family Communications Workgroup, and the National Center for Post-Adoption Support.A former educator and adoptive parent, Laura brings lived experience, policy insight, and powerful storytelling to every stage and session. She is a sought-after keynote speaker, workshop facilitator, and thought partner—known for inspiring connection, sparking collaboration, and offering tools that professionals can use right away.Because When We CONNECT, Children THRIVE.https://icare4aaff.org/https://www.instagram.com/iCARE4AAFFhttps://www.facebook.com/iCARE4AAFF Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

How open are you to learning? When we know more we do better. So lifelong learning isn't something to be shunned by our impatience, but welcomed in. Listen in as Rashunda who adopted three teens from the welfare system shares her learnings on learning.Rashunda Williams joined the CHRIS 180 team in 2023 as the Director of Foster Care and Adoptions, before being promoted to the role of VP, Community Residential Services.Williams is responsible for the leadership and strategic direction of our community and residential programs that serve children, young adults and families, including CHRIS 180’s adoption homes, foster homes, and Summit Trail Apartments.For more than two decades, Williams has worked in the social service sector and holds a Bachelor of Science in Social Work and a Master of Business Administration. She has extensive knowledge of psychiatric hospitals, community-based services, adolescent group homes, foster care, the juvenile justice system and the mental health spectrum. Additionally, she has experience in client-centered therapeutic services to children, adolescents and couples.Prior to joining the CHRIS 180 team, Williams served in several leadership roles within the social service sector in Nevada, California, and Georgia.Her professional interests are resiliency across the life span, challenges of families with limited access to mental health and healthcare services, people centric leadership, diversity and equity in the workplace, prevention services, and continued training and development of mental health professionals.Williams enjoys traveling, interior designing, reading and is an avid community volunteer.Find out more about Rashunda and her organisation here:https://chris180.org/https://www.facebook.com/CHRIS180Advocate/https://www.linkedin.com/company/chris180/https://www.instagram.com/CHRIS180_Advocate/https://www.linkedin.com/in/rashunda-williams-b18437202/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Are you suffering right now? It probably - or definitely - doesn't feel like it, but finding the purpose in that pain somehow makes it more bearable. The earlier we can see that purpose the sooner the pain can ease. Join Donna and I as we dive in life changing insights and shifts in perspective. Donna is an adoptive mother, executive director of an adoption agency and podcaster.Here's a bit about Donna from her agency's website:Donna is an irreplaceable member of our adoption agency, dedicated to aiding women who are contemplating placing their child for adoption. Helping women through an unexpected pregnancy has become her life’s journey. She is seldom “off duty.” On weekends she communicates with birth mothers to aid them with their financial concerns or traveling to a hospital to ensure they are receiving the best medical possible.Her resolute dedication and heartfelt compassion make her an essential figure in supporting these women throughout their entire journey.Donna ensures that every person who works at Heart to Heart Adoptions treats birth mothers and adoptive families with respect and compassion. She insists on a non-judgmental approach to every situation. She creates a safe and nurturing space for them to share their concerns, dreams, and worries. By approaching each individual with empathy and without judgment, Donna ensures that these exceptional women have the necessary guidance and resources to make well-informed decisions.Donna’s expertise within the Utah Adoption Agency lies in her ability to find the perfect match between birth mothers and adoptive families, making her an invaluable asset to our agency.Connect with her here:https://www.linkedin.com/in/donna-pope-41652ba/Explore her podcast here:https://www.instagram.com/voicesof_adoption/reel/DLH-sYjJPf4/?__d=1https://voicesofadoption.podup.com/https://www.instagram.com/voicesof_adoption/Find out more about her podcast here:https://hearttoheartadopt.com/https://www.facebook.com/HeartToHeartAdoptionhttps://www.instagram.com/hearttoheartadoptions/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Tough stuff feels, well, tough. But with hindsight it becomes clear that the tough stuff prompts our biggest learnings. What if we could see the gift of the tough stuff earlier? Be more grateful for it when we are in it? Listen in as adoptive mom Jacee shares her insights on grace, grief and learnings. Powerful.Here's the interview with Jacee's mother.https://thriving-adoptees.simplecast.com/episodes/our-spirit-isnt-traumatised-with-dana-hargus Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

If you're going through tough stuff, this one's for you. Truly inspirational. Adopted at 9 months Sharon grew up in an alternative universe. One that felt completely alien to her. Her adoptive mother kicked her out of the house when she got pregnant at 18. Life got tougher until she found herself at rock bottom and attempting suicide. How did she turn it around? Listen into profound learnings from a remarkably resilient lady.Find out more about Sharon here:https://giftfamilyservices.com/about-gift-family-services/our-coaches/sharon-butler-obazee/https://www.instagram.com/adoptionclarity/?hl=en-gbhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/gift-family-services/https://www.facebook.com/sobazee03/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

If you're in hell keep going. But how? Listen in as Adoption Permanency Director Alaina dives into digging deep, what empowers us to persist through the toughest of tough stuff and more...Find out more about the company Alaina works for here:https://www.enniscenter.org/www.enniscenter.org https://www.facebook.com/EnnisCenter/#Find out more about adoption support in Michigan here:www.mare.org Listen to the podcast with Jaycie on secondary trauma herehttps://thriving-adoptees.simplecast.com/episodes/healing-for-them-jaycie-bias Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Vince's mission is to add value to everyone he meets. Listen in and let him add value to you with his insights, learnings and wisdom. Vince and his wife have six kids, three of whom are adopted. He's also Executive Director at Keystone Family Alliance.Keystone Family Alliance is comprised of representatives from different churches around the state of Pennsylvania. We aim to educate, motivate, and equip every Christian in the state of Pennsylvania on the needs of orphans and vulnerable children, both locally and globally.  Everybody can do something to positively impact these children, and the Alliance wants to help you find YOUR something. We bridge the gap between the desperate need of the child welfare system and PA churches. Agencies and caseworkers struggle to find new foster and adoptive families to meet the current, overwhelming need. Keystone Family Alliance mobilizes Christians from around Pennsylvania. For some, it is registering to meet tangible needs of foster, adoptive, and biological families through our online portal, Gateway. For others, it is serving on an engineered Care Community to support a local family for a year. For churches, Keystone Family Alliance provides the framework and support to help churches successfully recruit families to care for children in their communities to become these much-needed placement homes. There are so many ways to do something.https://www.linkedin.com/in/vince-smith-0214808a/https://www.keyfam.org/https://www.instagram.com/keystonefamilyalliance/https://www.facebook.com/keystonefamilyalliance  Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

If things are looking tough right now, here's some hope for you...According to one of my mentors - Richard Wilkins "The past is a place of reference, not a place of residence" The past may explain the present but it needn't dictate the future. Join Erin and Megan as we explore hope, healing and more as we look forward to a brighter future.Erin Argue is Heart Galleries of Texas Post-Permanency DirectorErin Argue first came to TACFS as an intern in 2022 during an MSW program at Texas State and returned as the Heart Galleries of Texas Associate Director in 2023. Before the Alliance, Erin spent her career supporting youth in foster care at member organizations, Partnerships for Children and Settlement Home for Children. There, she managed major programs, services, and projects.Originally from the Great Lakes State, Erin graduated from Michigan State University and earned two B.S. degrees in Psychology and Environmental Geosciences.Now, Erin lives in Austin. As a people person with a love for connection, she spends lots of time outside, with friends, and with her dog, Charlie the Bandit.Megan Ransom is Chief Executive Officer The Texas Alliance of Child and Family Services (TACFS).Megan joined TACFS as the Director of Community Engagement in 2019, moved into the role of Chief of Staff in 2021, and became the CEO in 2025. She came to TACFS from Partnerships for Children, an Austin-based nonprofit, where she served as the Director of Foster and Adoption Services. Megan worked closely with DFPS and many Central Texas child placing agencies and nonprofits on community education/outreach initiatives built around children in the foster care system who are waiting for adoption. She also worked at Texas CASA in the Quality Assurance Department.She has a passion for building strategic collaborations that produce results and continuously work towards improvement of practices and partnerships to lift up the children and families involved in the child welfare system.An Indiana native, Megan earned a BA in Sociology & Psychology from Indiana University and a Master’s of Nonprofit Management from Regis University in Denver, Colorado. She is also Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI) Practitioner through the Karyn Purvis institute of Child Development.Megan and her husband are parents to two boys, both adopted through the Texas foster care system.https://www.linkedin.com/in/meganshawrhoades/https://www.linkedin.com/in/erin-argue-2055646/https://tacfs.org/https://www.instagram.com/txalliancecfs/https://www.facebook.com/texasalliance/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Secondary trauma can build up within us without us noticing. Even veteran therapist Bessel van der Kolk who's the author of the bestselling book The Body Keeps The Score wasn't aware of his secondary trauma until very  recently. And secondary trauma is common amongst adoptive parents. Do you want to heal for your kids? Be triggered less often? At peace more? Listen in as adoptive mother Jaycie and Executive Director shares her learnings on healing secondary trauma, choosing love over grief and much more.https://www.linkedin.com/in/jayciebias/https://www.facebook.com/WVFosterParents/https://wvfosterparents.org/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Are you advocating for your child or change? As every parent knows systems can be very tricky to navigate and change. The better we can understand them, the better we can relate with the people we deal with and more likely we are to get what we want. Listen in asDirector of Foster Care and Permanency Michelle shares her inside knowledge on systems, change and more.Here is a bit about Michelle from her website:"I'm often asked what brought me to this work; child protection, public service, and anti-oppression efforts. The answer is the same for all: my community's needs, desires, and experiences gave my career direction. Describing myself as a mixed kid from the projects doesn't always get a favorable reaction, but it's the truth and holds no shame for me. Neither do any of the other identities that make me the person I am today.I hold a Master's degree in public administration from Metropolitan State University and an undergraduate in psychology and women studies. My public services career started with my first professional job out of college as an alternative response case manager on the east side of Saint Paul. That position was my introduction to child protection; quickly discovering the disparities, I realized the change needed would have to come from within the system causing these poor outcomes. Finding my way to spaces and fighting for a seat at the table among decision-makers was not the solution I thought it would be.As a child protection worker, I found that policies, practices, and statutes interfered with my ability to make decisions in the best interest of families. As a supervisor, I found some of the same challenges, and the team I supported described transgressions in moral code during supervision. As a manager, I started to draw the connection between staff retention and outcomes for families. It became clear that staff supported in making decisions that align with their values remain in high-stakes decision-making positions. The unnamed emotions and blame the system placed on professionals led me to the term Moral Injury. Once I found the name of my experience, I felt empowered, becoming driven to inform the workforce and hold systems responsible."Here are some links for more infohttps://mn.gov/dhs/partners-and-providers/program-overviews/child-protection-foster-care-adoption/african-american-child-well-being/https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelle-d-seymore-42b0983b/https://www.revisor.mn.gov/statutes/cite/260.692#:~:text=The%20African%20American%20Child%20and,in%20the%20child%20welfare%20system;https://www.michelledseymore.com/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Does fear hold you back? Fear of the unknown? Fear of things not working out? Sometimes life requires us to make a leap of faith. Listen in as Terri talks about leaps of faith, unconditional love and more...Listen to her first interview here https://thriving-adoptees.simplecast.com/episodes/helping-kids-feel-loveable-lovedAs an adoptive mom, Terri knows how fortunate she is to have her daughter, and also how very rare her story is. Not quite ten years into raising her daughter, she did some research and found that less than one percent of girls facing unplanned pregnancy choose adoption for their babies. Digging into the reasons why that is so, Terri conducted several focus groups in her home and discovered that most women facing unplanned pregnancy simply don’t realize that adoption is an option. They believe they must choose between parenting and terminating their pregnancy.As a seasoned marketing executive, Terri has deep and broad experience in communicating a precise, value-based message to affect change. For over two decades, she has consulted to Silicon Valley companies and led their strategic marketing and communications efforts. (See MarketSavvy Inc.)She founded Unplanned Good to promote adoption as a viable option for women facing unplanned pregnancy. This is in response to contemporary beliefs in our society that young women have only two choices; abortion or parenting.All too often, young women face unplanned pregnancies. When they do, they typically see only two choices: to become parents, often in their teens, or to terminate their pregnancies. It’s rare that they consider the alternative path – seeing the pregnancy through to delivery and placing the baby for adoption.The mission of our organization is to promote adoption as a viable, reasonable option for those dealing with unplanned pregnancies, such that the result is good for all involved.https://www.unplannedgood.org/https://twitter.com/Unplanned_Goodhttps://www.facebook.com/UnplannedGood/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Can you open your heart more fully? Shamele has opened her heart to 4 kids through adoption, another through a special guardianship and over 300 more through fostering them. Listen in as we dive into helping our kids have fun, feel listened to and loved.Find out more about Shamele:https://www.linkedin.com/in/shamele-jenkins-bb9ab712/https://www.facebook.com/shamele.jenkins/https://www.mdcfapa.org/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Change is hard. Until an insight happens. Whether that's about how we feel, what causes those feelings, our behaviour or anything else. So changing is a seeing thing. Listen in as Steve shares some of the insights that have done the heavy lifting. We hope this interview catalyses some changes for you.Steve joins the team at Hand in Hand with a background in non-profit organizations, the healthcare industry and higher education.  He holds a B.A. in Public Relations, a Master of Divinity, and an M.A. in Psychology, all of which have allowed him to do what he is most passionate about: making a positive difference in the lives of others.  Steve heads up operations for Hand In Hand and his outgoing personality makes him a fantastic spokesperson for introducing Hand In Hand to new families and organizations that we partner with. Steve and his spouse have five adopted children. Steve is always excited to share his family’s experience with others to show them the incredible ways that adoption can transform lives.  He is an avid sports fan, enjoys going to games and can normally be found adventuring with his kiddos throughout California. Steve is not afraid to go outside of his comfort zone and has even run a marathon in Italy to raise funds for charity! He loves being a father, first and foremost, and enjoys being able to give that experience to other families through his work with Hand in Hand.Find out more at:https://www.hihiadopt.org/https://www.instagram.com/hand_in_hand_intl_adoptions/?hl=enhttps://www.facebook.com/HandInHandInternationalAdoptions/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

From rainbows and unicorns to adoption is trauma. Pendulums swing too far before they settle into balance. Listen in as we find a more balanced approach that's closer to the truth.Ryan Hanlon became President and CEO of NCFA in May 2022 after serving as the Vice President of Education, Research, and Constituent Services since August 2017. Prior to joining NCFA, he served as the Executive Director of an accredited adoption agency that provided domestic and international adoption services.Ryan is a frequent conference speaker, podcast guest, and go-to source for national and regional media on a range of adoption issues. He has expertise in accreditation and regulatory issues, state licensing matters, and adoption-related policy topics. Passionate about research and education, Ryan seeks to ensure that all those impacted by adoption have the resources and support they need to thrive in their families and communities.See Ryan’s April 2023 appearance on C-SPAN’s Washington Journal.Ryan holds four advanced degrees including an M.A. in Liberal Arts, an M.S. in Nonprofit Management, and an M.S. and a Ph.D. in Social Work. He has served as a social work field instructor and an adjunct professor of social work to both undergraduate, graduate, and doctoral students.In 2022, Ryan received the Angel in Adoption award from the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute. Ryan lives in Northern Virginia with his wife and their four children including a son adopted internationally.Here's the article we mention.https://ifstudies.org/blog/beyond-hashtags-what-the-anti-adoption-movement-gets-wrongFind out more about Ryan here:https://www.linkedin.com/in/ryan-hanlon-/https://adoptioncouncil.org/https://www.facebook.com/AdoptionCouncil/https://www.instagram.com/adoptioncouncil/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

It takes courage to tackle the tough stuff in adoption. It takes courage to love our kids when that love isn't reciprocated. Listen in as Melody talks about courage, support from others and much more. Melody has five kids including one from adoption.Melody Marshall is the Co-Executive Director of My Village Ministries, a local initiative focused on family preservation, and the Co-Executive Director of Upstream Collaborative, a nationwide network of family preservation ministries. After receiving a B.S. in Human Development and Family Science, Melody has pursued work that aligns with God’s calling to serve vulnerable families.Melody’s professional journey has spanned various roles, from house parent for at-risk teens to paraprofessional for children with special needs. Her experiences have shaped her unwavering dedication to the marginalized, the orphan, and the widow. Guided by a deep faith, Melody has seen God’s hand at work in her life, leading her to a clear calling to mobilize the Church to preserve socially isolated families in crisis, helping them build sustainable support systems and pathways to healing.https://www.linkedin.com/in/melody-marshall-1b19712ab/https://myvillageministries.com/https://www.facebook.com/myvillageministrieshttps://www.instagram.com/my.village.ministries/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

If I can't heal, I can't help them heal. That's the truth that hit Heather like a tonne of bricks. The more whole we feel, the better placed we are to help our kids heal. Listen in as we dive deep into healing, feeling loved and busting beliefs. A deep and empowering episode full of hard won insights. Heather's mother was in foster care and Heather was adopted by her grandmother. Heather has adopted too. Find out more at:https://www.linkedin.com/in/heather-branam-5971351b6/mystic-moon-healing.com Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

Sexual abuse and neglect leave deep scars. How can anyone become grateful for these? In one of our most profound turnaround stories ever, Trent shares how adoptive family, faith and therapy have fuelled his healing, recovery from PTSD and more. 100% inspirational. Trent leaves me speechless and stumbling. Epic.Trent entered foster care at the age of four due to domestic violence, extreme neglect, and sexual abuse. After traveling a painful journey through the foster care system, Trent was adopted at the age of nine and came to dramatic levels of healing from his traumatic past. Trent, who is now 24 years old, has devoted his life to helping others find healing. Trent is a mentor and public speaker and has authored and published two books. Trent graduated from Arizona State University with a 4.0 GPA with a B.S. in Family and Human Development. Trent is CEO and Co-Founder of Watch Me Rise in Wake Forest, North Carolina. Trent is a trauma consultant and serves as a TBRI Practitioner, Life Coach, Educational Therapist, mentor, and parent trainer. Trent gives all the glory to God for his healing and strives to be a light in the darkness.https://www.watchmerise919.org/https://www.facebook.com/WatchMeRiseLLChttps://www.instagram.com/watchmerise919/https://x.com/WatchMeRise6 Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

How do you handle pain, like when your son says he hates you? There's something that us humans don't like about complexity. And yet adoption IS complex. Painful and wonderful. When it's painful it can be very painful. Listen as we dive into complexity, emotional intelligence and more.Cindy and her husband, Michael have three children through birth and adoption. She's also Director for the Beyond post adoption program at Circle Of Care in Oklahoma.Find out more athttps://circleofcare.org/programs/beyond/https://www.facebook.com/circleofcareokhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/cindyboecking/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.

So many of us so much time ruminating on the past or worrying about the future. What Do You Need Right Now? The question can shock us into the present and unleash our wisdom. Listen in as Rebecca shares how that question changed everything and could do the same for you.Rebecca Harvin is the founder and Executive Director of Haven. Rebecca, and her husband Brad, began fostering in 2017 and in July of 2022, they adopted a sibling set of four. They also have 2 biological children. Haven Retreats was born from a season of caregiver burnout and the assumption that if she needs a space for rest, therapy and Jesus... other people probably do too.As an Enneagram 7, Rebecca loves adventure, traveling, spontaneity and engaging the world around her with humor and a positive outlook. www.havenretreatsinc.orghttps://www.facebook.com/havenretreatsinc/https://www.instagram.com/haven.retreats/?hl=enhttps://www.instagram.com/rebeccaharvin/?hl=enhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/rebecca-harvin/ Guests and the host are not (unless mentioned) licensed pscyho-therapists and speak from their own opinion only. Seek qualified advice if you need help.