A Fine Balance: a podcast that explores how to find a work-life balance that works for you

The tiresome chores required to maintain a house and sustain the lives within it are more than the sum of their parts. They create a home, and a safe and comfortable haven, both for individuals and for raising a family. Do they, therefore, fall under the “work” or “home” sides of the work-life balance equation?They certainly often feel like work. Hard work. Yet, they’re unpaid and occupy the time spent when not “at work”. This podcast episode, features the writer and “home worker” Helen Hayward. In this episode, we discuss: 📕 Helen’s new book, which challenges criticisms of domesticity from the likes of feminist icons like Simone de Beauvoir. 🧚‍♂️ The “Cinderella” moments of being a career-oriented mother and a home-maker. 👵🏼 The pursuit of balance when you are caring for ageing parents as well as a family home and children. 💍 The pursuit of balance when your marriage comes to an end. 👩‍👧Mother-daughter dynamics and finding balance as you seek your own path, and experience rejection. 🧽 Finding meaning and creativity in housework, housekeeping, and home-making - all the “work” that makes a house a home. Some tips, tricks, and inspiration to find your balance when this is part of your “job” and identity. 🙏🏼 The meaning of life. You can read more about my interview with Helen at www.a-fine-balance.com/podcast.

What did you learn from your parents about the way they worked when you were growing up? Did their work-life balance approach inspire you to follow in their footsteps? Or did it have the opposite effect and encourage you to do things differently? In turn as a parent yourself, how do you think the values you place on your work are internalised by your children? Does it matter? In this short Work, Life Balance Lesson segment I try to unpack this knotty subject of parent-child dynamic through sharing examples of the observations I've made on the subject, and reaching some concluding lessons that have stayed with me from all those conversations. Here are the links to some of the interviews referenced in this episode, and you can access the full catalogue of 'A Fine Balance' interviews at www.a-fine-balance.com. "Parent Power" blog post: https://a-fine-balance.com/2021/04/19/parent-power/ "Matthew’s Story: The Work-Life Balance Logic of a Full-Time NHS Key Worker – It’s a Science, not an Art": https://a-fine-balance.com/2020/12/23/matthews-story-work-life-balance-logic-its-a-science-not-an-art/ Jhilmil’s Story – “My Work, My Identity”: on competitiveness, co-parenting & surviving job loss: https://a-fine-balance.com/2021/08/30/a-fine-balance-the-podcast-episode-2-out-now/ "On Not Being Career-Oriented and Finding Balance as a Musician and a Newlywed": https://a-fine-balance.com/2023/02/03/its-official-season-two-of-a-fine-balance-the-podcast-is-live/ "Finding Balance in Retirement: Tom’s Story – on Empathy, Leadership & Passion for your Vocation": https://a-fine-balance.com/2022/06/18/a-fine-balance-the-podcast-episode-8-out-now/ "Soli’s Story – “Sunny-Side Up, Please”: Self-Care for Caring Professionals, Finding Balance in Mid-Life & Staying Positive When the Course of Motherhood Doesn’t Run Smooth": https://a-fine-balance.com/2021/07/26/happy-1st-birthday-a-fine-balance/. "Tahmid’s Story – Ethnic minority beginnings, burnout and career change": https://a-fine-balance.com/2021/09/29/a-fine-balance-the-podcast-episode-3-out-now/

My guest this episode is Rami Madbouli, who, at the time of this podcast recording, was working as a Private Secretary to Ministers in the UK Government’s Department of Health & Social Care. Rami’s 90:10 work:life ratio is the highest figure weighting on the work side that has featured on ‘A Fine Balance’. And whilst this is a work-life balance that – on the whole – works well for Rami, he says that he usually finds that it's met with disapproval. That Rami applies a 90:10 figure on his work:life ratio was, as always, just a starting point to our conversation. In the process, we touch on: What it’s like when you feel proud and motivated by the mission of your work, even if you’re not paid any extra for working more than your contracted hours; Work being something that identifies who you are at any given stage in life; Finding balance in a relationship when both partners are career-oriented and ambitious; Making work-life balance choices that deviate from what’s considered “normal” by your peers both in and outside of work; Modelling your work-life balance choices according to your upbringing, and opting to make choices different to those that your parents made when you were growing up; and Rami’s tips for squeezing more into one day than you may have thought possible. At the heart of his story though, was Rami’s description of being an introvert, and how he recharges his energy by spending time alone rather than by surrounding himself with other people. This provided a rich, and essentially logical, backdrop to the hours that Rami chooses to dedicate to his work, and, indeed, how he chooses to spend his time outside of work too. To read more about my interview with Rami and with those other people mentioned on this podcast episode, go to: www.a-fine-balance.com/podcast.

I have learned so much from all the interviews I’ve conducted since launching my blog in 2020 – asking people from all walks of life about the choices they make when balancing work with everything else. Over time I’ve gathered many examples of actions that people have taken to find their balance. I’ve also noticed common themes emerging from them. So I’ve decided to introduce some short bitesize podcast episodes to showcase and reflect on some of these lessons, which I hope listeners will find useful in considering their own work:life ratio. The first lesson I’d like to showcase is an issue that I’ve covered recently on the blog and podcast, and that is finding balance when you have a smartphone and you engage with social media. You can read up about all the interviews I reference on the episode at www.a-fine-balance.com.

My guest this episode is my good friend and neighbour, Bettina Jacobs. Bettina works as both a photography teacher and a freelance photographer. Married with three children, there’s already a lot on her plate before taking into account her charity work, extended family commitments and a busy home and social life. In this episode of ‘A Fine Balance – The Podcast’, Bettina describes how developing her passion into a side hustle has afforded her a sense of balance that was previously not in the scope of her ambitions. Her journey to where she is today is essentially one of self-discovery, a coming of age of sorts. It also recognises the power that a good mentor and a supportive partner can have in building up a person’s confidence, and encouraging them to make the most of their talents. In this episode, we cover: 🎙️How turning a passion into a “side hustle” can improve your sense of balance 🎙️The balancing act of juggling work and motherhood when you work two jobs and have three children – how does she do it?! 🎙️The evolution of finding balance in a marriage 🎙️The impact that mental health can have on the pursuit of balance 🎙️The importance of not being quick to make assumptions about someone else’s work-life balance choices. To see the full catalogue of Bettina’s photography, go to her Instagram page @bettinajphotography. To read more about my interview with Bettina, go to: www.a-fine-balance.com.

Do you ever feel like you’re dragging your heels in getting started with something?Does your to-do list stare back at you as a reminder of all the things that you need to get done but haven’t made time for yet? And does that in turn create a sense of overwhelm, which skews your sense of work-life balance? If so, this podcast episode could be just what you need to help get yourself on track to finding your balance in 2024. My guest this episode is the wellness business mentor, self-belief coach, and host of the podcast “Just Start Now”, Vicky Shilling. In this episode, we cover: 🎙️Vicky’s practical tips on summoning up the motivation to get things started in your life. 🎙️How “taking control” of your emotions can help provide clarity when setting your priorities. 🎙️How engaging with social media can skew your balance and what to do about it. 🎙️ What it’s like pursuing balance as a career-driven mother who, before having kids, worked 24/7 and loved it. 🎙️How pregnancy impacts your sense of balance (particularly when you’re not broody). 🎙️The experience of being a child of divorced parents and how that experience can influence work-life balance decisions later on in life. As an avid listener of Vicky’s podcast, throughout this episode I try to keep a lid on my excitement (and nerves) at interviewing an experienced podcaster whose work I have enjoyed. Vicky did not disappoint; her willingness to be open and vulnerable, as well as provide explicit practical advice, provided lots of food for thought, and tips for facing the year ahead with motivation and a positive mental attitude. As such, there’s lots for listeners to take away, whatever time of year they happen to tune in to this episode. And it feels like the perfect note on which to kickstart Season 3 of ‘A Fine Balance - The Podcast’. You can read more about my interview with Vicky here: www.a-fine-balance.com/podcast To find out more about Vicky's work go to: www.vickyshilling.com

Season 3 of ‘A Fine Balance - The Podcast’ will be coming out soon. Listen here for what to expect from future episodes. For more information, go to www.a-fine-balance.com/podcast and for updates, you can follow @afinebalance_blog on Facebook or Instagram.

In this special bonus episode, which is both the final episode of 2023 and the final episode of Season 2 of ‘A Fine Balance - The Podcast’, I look back on all the conversations I’ve hosted on the podcast this year. We dip into each 2023 podcast interview, and play back an extract from my conversations with guests about how they balance work with everything else in life. Also included is an short audio clip from an event I took part in this year with parenting expert and author Anita Cleare on finding balance as a working parent. This episode offers the opportunity to thank all of my 2023 guests for so generously sharing their personal and insightful perspectives on the pursuit of balance. Thanks also to listeners for tuning in this year. I look forward to more interviews in 2024, and will be sharing more soon about Season 3, which will start in the new year. Links to all 'A Fine Balance - The Podcast' episodes can be found here: https://a-fine-balance.com/podcast/ You can read my blog on the pursuit of balance for working parents on Anita Cleare's blog 'Thinking Parenting Blog' here: https://anitacleare.co.uk/in-pursuit-of-work-life-balance/. To watch the recording of Anita and my event, 'Work-Life Balance: What Works for Working Parents', click here: https://mailchi.mp/positiveparentingproject/work-life-balance.

This episode features former blog guest Sam Franklin, a father of two who works part-time as Head of Innovation Consulting in a global tech corporation. I published a write-up of my interview with Sam on International Men’s Day 2020, which felt fitting given that his take on work-life balance centred on empowering men to take ownership of how they choose to spend their time, both in and outside work. A vital part of that, he argued, was championing the role that men play in creating true equality with their female counterparts – particularly those with caring responsibilities. At the time of interviewing Sam, he had only recently become a father. Once he started navigating his company’s paternity leave policy, he realised that he was the first male employee in his organisation to challenge some of the rules and assumptions around working fathers taking an active childcare role at home. His paternity leave arrangement set a precedent in his corporate employer and he later went on to be offered a promotion, which he accepted only on the condition that it be a part-time role – allowing him to commit to spending one full day a week looking after his daughter. For Sam, this arrangement afforded him a true sense of balance. Now here we are, three years later, and I’m delighted to be hosting Sam on the podcast. His situation has drastically changed since 2020, both in his work and home life. And we get to that during this podcast episode. We also discover what a superpower it is not being a perfectionist, and how Sam's satisfaction with things being "good enough" has enabled him to pack in a remarkably busy career, volunteering commitments and home life. Sam's perspective of balancing work with everything else in life has been brought sharply into focus most recently due to his cancer diagnosis. His experience affords him a perspective that is a sobering reminder of how precious our time is, and how choosing how you spend it really matters. It is a great privilege to share this podcast episode as the final one of 2023, and indeed the final episode of Season 2 of my podcast. With new year’s resolutions traditionally on the mind at this time of year, I hope my dear listeners will find Sam’s life-affirming story a thought provoking and uplifting accompaniment to 2023 drawing to a close, and welcoming in 2024. To read more about this podcast episode and see the photo - as promised in the interview - of Sam sporting his batman onesie (and more), follow this link: https://a-fine-balance.com/2023/12/18/a-fine-balance-the-podcast-season-2-episode-8-out-now/ You can read the blog post I wrote about Sam's work-life balance story back in 2020 here: https://a-fine-balance.com/2020/11/19/sams-story-fighting-the-good-fight-part-time-working-fatherhood-paternal-working-rights-and-living-with-cancer/

On 7th October 2023, the world woke up to horrific news of a terrorist attack in Israel. The trauma of this attack, and the war that has ensued, is far-reaching and multifaceted. And, as I write, it is still so raw and unfolding. With the help of my friend, clinical psychologist and psychotherapist, Dr Ian Moran, I have hastily pulled together an "emergency" podcast episode, to host a conversation about navigating the thorny question of how to find balance when you’re living through war. In keeping true to the concept of the blog and podcast 'A Fine Balance', where I host conversations about how people from all backgrounds and life stages balance work with other things in life, hosting this conversation felt more pressing than ever. Throughout our conversation, Ian and I explore how people can help themselves to pursue some balance when everything feels off-kilter as it does now. And how to support loved ones to find their balance too, amidst the shock, uncertainty and violence of terrorism and war. It's no wild spoiler alert to say that towards the end of the recording, despite my efforts to direct questions towards practical advice and guidance, Ian shares the weighty perspective that sometimes you just have to accept when there is no balance. For some, this is that time. There is no balance. That it's ok not to feel ok.   Nevertheless, I hope that listeners might find some comfort, reassurance, or even at the very least a distraction from the news. To find out more about Ian’s work, and the range of therapeutic support available to those in need, please visit www.doctorianmoran.com.

This episode, which was recorded during Pride month, features the investigative journalist, author, and equal parenting advocate, Paul Morgan-Bentley. During our conversation, Paul shares his experience of coming out and we discuss what impacted his sense of balance during those formative years. Having reluctantly resigned himself to accept that as a gay man, fatherhood was a closed door for him, Paul’s life changed when he and his husband discovered that surrogacy was an option. “I mourned my fertility”, Paul says, as we discuss how his assumed infertility has gone on to impact his work-life balance choices as a parent, and he generously shares some insight into what helped him maintain his balance in those difficult times. Paul’s book, ‘The Equal Parent’, is based on his perspective of sharing the parental load when you’re in a same sex marriage. Our conversation focuses on the impact that parental equality can have on parents’ sense of balance, with some thought-provoking and practical advice based on Paul’s observations of the deeply ingrained gender stereotypes which, he argues, reinforce inequalities in the home and the workplace. Recording this episode during ‘Pride month’ is no coincidence and I’m so grateful to Paul for making himself available at this time to recognise what the celebrations mark and signify to him. Being proud of something means more just feeling satisfied with it. That word – pride - implies a degree of celebration. There is an instinctive interplay between feeling proud about something that you’ve done - or something that you are - and feeling a degree of balance in life. For Paul, parenting equally with his husband contributes significantly to his contented sense of balance. ‘Acceptance’ underlies it all, and is something that Paul refers to again and again throughout our conversation.

In this episode, Laura shares the story of her decision to leave the teaching profession in order to regain some balance in her life. She describes the difficulties she encountered in finding balance as a teacher, and how the mounting workload, and the pressure - both in and outside of work - pushed her to a breaking point. And she touches on some of the tools that she applied to recognise and recover from burning out. Laura also talks about her experience of falling pregnant in her teens, and her pursuit of balance back then when, contrary to most of her student peers, she was juggling school life with the responsibilities of motherhood. Having been on the receiving end of a lot of criticism, Laura also talks about the impact that this has had, and continues to have, on her work-life balance choices. As you can probably tell from the this short run-through of this episode’s content, my guest packs a lot in to her time. Did I mention that since leaving teaching, she has changed careers to become a project manager for an engineering consultancy, and that she has a home-baking business on side too? And there are those five children I definitely mentioned… It’s no wonder then that Laura describes herself as “the busiest person I know”. Which leads me to this loaded question: How do you find balance when you’re busy? Laura doesn’t come with all the answers. She’s still in the thick of it, so to speak, and pursuing her ‘fine balance’ as she goes, one day at a time, depending on whatever challenge life throws her way.

I'm delighted to introduce my guest of this podcast episode, Ruth Todd CBE. Ruth's career has been full of managing complex infrastructure and change projects for a string of blue-chip companies, often under public scrutiny. Formerly Programme Director of the UK's Vaccine Taskforce, Ruth now works as Chief Commercial Officer of the largest infrastructure project in Europe: a new high speed rail line being built in the United Kingdom called HS2. She is also married with two children, and has multiple interests outside of her work and home. How does she find a balance between all of these "compartments" of her life? Well, that's what we get to in this podcast episode. Ruth is one of a handful of 'A Fine Balance' blog and podcast guests that have declined to assign a figure to their work:life ratio. For Ruth, balance comes down to "having it all", and being mindful of living “in the present” and accepting your choices with confidence and conviction. In this podcast episode, Ruth and I touch on some of the practical approaches that she has mastered to avoid feeling stressed, as well as the benefits of self-awareness to avoid "over-playing your strengths". Ruth shares her insight also on the value that building a diverse and values-based team has had on her sense of balance. So that, for example, through surrounding herself with people that complement her strengths, she can ‘have it all’, without ‘doing it all’. Similarly, her ‘teamwork’ approach at home, where she and her husband share the work load equally – enlisting their sons to get stuck in too, and employing additional help where needed – has created the foundations for them both to pursue the careers and family life they desire. Whether or not you identify with Ruth's work-life balance choices, this podcast episode is an inspiring listen, which centres on living life to the full and being present in the moment.

Gilles Dahan, a former banker and head of global trading, left the finance industry in 2019, and now works as a consultant and entrepreneur. Gilles has always thrived on working hard. Growing up, he was taught that “work is everything”. As a working adult, his career has been the source of his greatest fulfilment. And his “work” has consistently and purposefully dominated his work-life balance. Nonetheless, married with three children, Gilles regards himself as a family man through and through, and he neither feels guilty nor regrets prioritising work in the way that he has done and continues to do. In fact, Gilles feels that he has a work-life balance that is perfect for him. He thrives on his work; it nourishes him, fulfils him, and brings him a sense of contentment and satisfaction that would otherwise be lacking in his life. Not to mention, it enables him to provide for his family. Gilles shared his story on the blog, 'A Fine Balance', in the summer of 2022 where he described some of the strategies and approaches he has taken throughout his long, busy and successful career to make sure that the people – and things – that matter most to him still get the quality, if not the quantity of his time outside of work. At the time, he said the value of his work:life ratio was 80:20. He explained that it works because he is strategic, opportunistic and most importantly flexible. The 80:20 split, he says, “should move around and be flexible so that my family, and especially my children, know that I can always be available when it matters”. I’m delighted to welcome Gilles on the podcast to pick up where we left off and hear more about his take on balancing work with everything else in life. In this episode, as well as discussing finding balance when work takes priority, we touch on how to find purpose in any industry or role, and the influence that being the child of immigrants had on Gilles in establishing his work values.

Katie started her career as a vet, yet her experience of burnout on account of her pursuit of perfection led her down another path. She now describes herself as: speaker, imposter syndrome buster, vet entrepreneur. She’s also an author, by the way, and a few other things alongside that too. As an expert at “busting” imposter syndrome, and mastering personal narratives, in this episode, Katie shares a wealth of knowledge and academically-grounded insights and references, which I’m sure will be helpful to any listeners considering how to balance work with other things in life. Yet, it was the unexpected turn our conversation took to discussing the pursuit of balance while navigating grief that I think was most profound. Katie opens up about her own recent bereavement, and reflects on the long-lasting impact that grief has on a person’s work and life. She also delves into her experience of being a “high-achiever” and what impact this has had on her ability to establish a healthy balance between her studies, career, relationships and the time she devotes to the things that bring her joy (other than her work!). For Katie, all roads seem to lead to self-compassion and throughout our conversation she shares some practical suggestions on how to attain this, one being the power of connecting to your inner child. Now a business-owner, Katie touches on the how the transition from employed to self-employed has been for her. And much, much more… I guarantee that there is something for everyone to learn or take away from this episode. Happy listening!

In this episode, Amanda describes what it’s like to balance working as a musician with everything else in her life, especially her creative pursuits. She talks about the punishing self-discipline typical of musicians, and how she reconciles her inclination to spend her time constructively, with not being “career-oriented”. Amanda touches on the deliberate approach that she and her husband, who one day wish to have children, have taken to set the foundations for the work-life balance they aspire to: one that is flexible and stable. And she touches on how the career choices they've taken in the early years of their marriage have been influenced by their lived examples of growing up in homes with working parents. Amanda was an absolute pleasure to interview. Her enthusiastic and unapologetic take on including hedonism in her work:life ratio was refreshing, and I think she even went on to coin a brand new phrase live on the podcast: "life oriented" (as opposed to "career-oriented"). If you've ever heard that phrase before please do let me know - neither of us had! I hope that as well as enjoying her music, you’ll enjoy listening to what Amanda has to say about work, life and the pursuit of balance, her overarching message being: “Not everyone can be the best of the best. Just be the best you”. https://a-fine-balance.com/2023/02/03/its-official-season-two-of-a-fine-balance-the-podcast-is-live/

Season Two of ‘A Fine Balance - The Podcast’ is launching soon. Listen here to find out what to expect and be sure to subscribe so you know when Episode One is ready to drop.

Tom McLaughlan, a retired Government Relations Advisor, who now works voluntarily for a crisis intervention charity, first featured on ‘A Fine Balance - The Blog’ in August 2021. In this episode, we discuss in more depth Tom’s work-life balance choices - both today in retirement, and looking back at when he was in the height of his career. His emotive and honest reflections leave much food for thought about the opportunities and challenges of balancing priorities during these two life stages: one’s career peak, and their career’s end - and the “life” milestones that occur in between. Tom also shares his experiences of Imposter Syndrome and burnout, and we discuss the power that leaders have to impact their staff’s work-life balance. I hope to hear from any listeners that make it to the end and want to take up the challenge that the episode closes with!

In this bonus episode, which differs to this podcast’s usual format, Annabel Jeffcoate, coach and founder of ‘Balance for Teachers’ provides her professional advice on how to improve your work-life balance in 5 steps. She also goes into detail about the strategy that she has devised using the word BALANCE as an acronym. In this episode, Annabel shares her story about losing balance early on in her career, which resulted in a severe case of burnout, explaining how she has drawn from her own experience to help others. For more info on Annabel’s strategy and coaching services, go to www.worklifebalanceforteachers.com. And to read in more detail the profiles of people mentioned in this episode, that feature on the blog ‘A Fine Balance’, go to www.a-fine-balance.com.

This is a follow-up interview with Laurie Macpherson, who first featured on ‘A Fine Balance - The Blog’ in July 2021. https://a-fine-balance.com/2021/07/04/finding-balance-on-her-own-terms-single-by-choice-childfree-by-choice-lauries-story-on-doing-what-suits-you/. Laurie is a career coach and mentor who owns her own business, The Grow Consultancy, advising people on career choices and job applications. Before becoming self-employed, Laurie worked for many years in the retail sector and also travelled all over the world working as a holiday rep and on cruises. When she featured on the blog, Laurie was keen to impress her perspective of finding balance as a single woman with no children: “I’m single by choice and childfree by choice”, she told me straight off, adding: “that doesn’t mean I want work to be my only ‘thing’”. “It’s not just working parents that have to worry about their work-life balance“, Laurie argues, a point she not just preaches but practices too, through her self-imposed "ground rules" as well as her business practices. She advocates that “single people have a right to feel proud about prioritising their life over work”. Contrary to previous guests on this podcast, Laurie claims that she doesn’t have a people-pleasing bone in her body and her philosophy is to “do what suits me”, backed up with the mantra “just do it”. So, if you’re sitting on the fence with a decision at the moment and need some encouragement, this podcast is one for you!