Hitch Route

We are OFFICIALLY at the start of Season 2 for Hitch Route! In case you live under a rock and somehow haven't heard the news, the OG pretty boy Thomas Edward Patrick Brady Jr has decided to hold off on ending his illustrious career. That's really all that needs to be said. This man decided to put all of the NFL's fans through an emotional roller coaster, and I don't intend to forgive him anytime soon.  P.S. This is Alex as always. Much to my chagrin (and Anish's joy), I must also mention that gifted but loathsome dickweed Aaron Rodgers is back too...

Alex here. I don't know about you, but I'm NOT feeling 22. That's right - today is my 23rd birthday; I have officially started my Jordan year as Rob put it. But even on my birthday, I don't get a day off from writing these episode descriptions... Ironically, we here at HR don't have an HR department; otherwise, I would've filed numerous complaints by now, but this was definitely the last straw. Unlike Brady, though, I'm not a quitter. I'm here for the long run, so I hope you'll be hearing my nonsensical dopamine and adrenaline-fueled antics for years to come. But even if today is about me, football comes first. This week, Anish and Rob and I took a deep dive into the conference championship matches, made our Super Bowl predictions, and spent an extended time honoring and reminiscing about TB12. Even if he's gone, though, the three of us are confident in the NFL's future because of all the shining young stars we have at the QB position, not to mention the talented stalwarts who likely have at least half a decade ahead of themselves. Make sure to tune in! Note: For legal purposes, neither Alex nor anyone associated with the Hitch Route podcast actually believes Thomas Edward Patrick Brady Jr. is a quitter and we all have deep respect for him. Retiring after a long, illustrious career deserves nothing but praise. Unlike the Cowboys and the Packers, he was the true antithesis to choke artistry. He may not have ended the season on top like last year, but he was still as clutch and committed as can be until his last snap. 

Another week has passed, but this one was for the record books. It would not be an overreaction to say this was perhaps the best divisional round in NFL history. And the fact that both Aaron Rodgers and Tom Brady were eliminated is part of the reason why (yes, Alex is writing the description as always). Half of the State Farm gang is gone -- and Mahomes is arguably only still in it because of a coin flip. It wasn't money that led to the Packers' demise, but it was Gould. The Chicago Bears will always get the last laugh, Anish. That's why we fired Matt and Ryan and replaced them with Matt and Ryan. All jokes aside, literally every game was a nail-biter that ended on the last play, and now we're in store for two very interesting conference championships. Can Joe Cool put out the red hot Chiefs? Will Sean McVay finally solve the Shanahan puzzle? Tune in to find out our takeaways from this past week and our predictions for Sunday.

Another week, another set of games, another set of co-hosts. For the first time ever, the exact combination is Alex and Cary, but otherwise, this episode is pretty straightforward. There are way fewer games to address, so we make sure to dig deep into our recaps and predictions while still making room for laughs and tangents along the way. Make sure to tune in!

Once upon a time, Fox lived in a dark cave. Fox was lazy, but wanted to obtain a lifetime's supply of gold. Fox heard about an intellectual decathlon that lasted 18 weeks. This decathlon was run by the mighty Panda. Panda was ambitious, and quite tough. He was not to allow any forgery, for there would be a large meal in store for Panda if he did catch a cheater. However, the winner received a large prize, enough to get the panda his lifetime's supply of bamboo. The panda decided that he would try his luck at the decathlon, but would also come up with a scheme of sorts. Fox decided to ask his two friends, Hare and Sheep*, to help him out. Fox pitched a plan to have himself dress up as Hare and Sheep and enter the decathlon as them. In exchange, he would give them a portion of the gold if he won disguised as them. Hare and Sheep were very dumb, so they were willing to let Fox participate in this competition for them. At first, the disguises were working perfectly as planned. In fact, Fox, "Hare", and "Sheep" were doing quite well. However, by around Week 9, Hare got cocky. "I'm going to do this myself," he said. "I'm going to win that money for myself." With no other option, Fox let him compete. By Week 11, Hare was out of the competition. Fearing the same fate, Sheep let Fox take over the rest of the way, and although Fox was outfoxed himself, he was able to get by as the unassuming Sheep, as animals would laugh as soon as they saw a sign of his dark complexion. At least Akash wasn't around. Fox made it all the way to the end as Sheep, far surpassing anyone else in the competition and claiming the prize. However, Panda found out about the scheme to cheat the decathlon, and was very unhappy about it. For weeks, he demanded answers from Hare, Sheep, and Fox, but no one budged. Eventually, there was a breakthrough. A tip from Hare to Panda gave Panda pause. Panda knew everything. Somewhere, somehow, Hare received 10 gold pieces. Fox was starting to become anxious. Panda was going to eat them. He didn't want to die. He had so much left to live for. He started to wonder how much longer he had. When Panda decided to meet with him and Sheep, he knew his time had come. What he found out is, Panda is an herbivore, and never would have done anything in the first place. Fox had become anxious for no reason, and realized that Panda was actually quite an amicable guy. They sat down and talked about the decathlon, and everything the year had brought. This is that conversation. * Sheep was actually quite dark for his kind. He in fact was considered the black sheep of the wild. However, unlike the idiom, he was quite acclaimed. His charisma was off the charts, although he did have quite the low constitution, which he would complain about. He was very well liked, and people always laughed when he was around. He brought a lot of joy to the wild as a black sheep, and he was proud of it. His dark complexion was unmatched. He was special.

BING BONG. We're back. And we're back in style. We might not be as handsome as Tom Brady or Jimmy G, but we're still more than sexy enough this week because we got all four hosts on for the first time ever! That's right: the absolutely lethal Alex-Anish-Rob-Cary combo. We're like the Burrow-Mixon-Chase-Higgins quartet of podcasts, and now all of us are finally on the gameday roster at the same time. Tune in as we tie a bow on the 2021 regular season, predict how Super Wild Card weekend goes, and have lots of laughs along the way in this cRaZy episode!

With Alex moving to New York, Anish is left on the mic by himself...watch him analyze, waffle, and yawn his way through this episode as he makes some great cases and interesting observations about the NFL.

HAPPY NEW YEAR'S EVERYONE!!! LET'S MAKE THIS YEAR A FUCKING GREAT ONE!

Welcome back to Hitch Route! As you may have noticed, Hitch Route took last week off for the holidays, so we hope y'all had a restful time. But now you get to hear our lovely/annoying voices once again! Not all of our voices, though; Anish was caught up with family obligations, so we have Alex as always but also Rob as a guest once again. Nevertheless, we persisted. The regular season is almost over, and we had a very interesting week of football to analyze and also another one that was arguably less interesting to predict. And perhaps it's because it's the holidays and we wanted to include some extra content - or more likely just because we're rusty - this episode will be a doozy. We hope you enjoy it, though, as we get back into peak performance before heading into the playoffs. Last but not least, we just wanted to write a formal dedication to the legendary John Madden. While he is not a founding father of the game like George "Papa Bear" Halas (yes, Alex is writing this as always), Madden helped directly shape much of how football culture currently exists today - obviously most notably in the form of his eponymous video games. A man who was full of life even until his death, he will be missed.

After a marvelous performance from backups Cary and Rob since our star players were put on IR due to finals, the starting lineup is back in place for Week 14! And while they may have gotten their jobs back, one man who didn't was none other than Urban Meyer. The Jacksonville experiment is over, but the Hitch Route experience lives on! This past week featured lots of good games with almost comebacks, including every AFC North game from Pittsburgh to Cincinnati to Baltimore (who faced Cleveland). But most tragically of all, one comeback that was successful was the effort by the putrid Packers to overcome the beloved Bears. That's right; in case it wasn't obvious already, Alex is back on writing duties. All in all, though, it was a very entertaining week to be a fan of the NFL. And it's only going to get better because of - outside of fantasy - no more bye weeks!!! Tune in this week to see for yourself how well Alex and Anish brush off the rust before charging* towards the end zone! *Yes yes, we know we didn't post this until AFTER the Chargers lost TNF, but we did our best. We still have to get back into form after our bye.

Like so many NFL teams who have had to turn to their benches this year to brave the cold, harsh reality of the longest season ever, so too has the cold, hard reality of Finals Week forced Hitch Route’s franchise QBs Alex and Anish to sit this one out, paving the way for our friends and former guests Rob and Cary to make the start in our place. And while it may not have been the prettiest performance worthy of a bust in Canton one day, we hope you come away from this week’s episode feeling just what we do — that Rob and Cary did more than enough to lead their respective teams to victory, and in this year’s NFL, especially in Week 13, sometimes that’s all it takes to get the job done. I mean, just ask the Seahawks, Steelers, and Lions. Yes, you heard that right — YOUR no-longer-winless Detroit Lions. You know what they say — a win is a win, and that’s all we’ll really remember once Alex and Anish emerge from the other side of their final papers. Enjoy.

Get it? PUNTer Kaufman? hahahahhahahhahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! - Anish Since I actually take our podcast seriously, let it be known that this is the episode where we make our predictions for Week 13. Also, this week honestly has to be the best of the season no doubt since it's impossible for the Packers to win. - Alex

Hey guys. This is the episode where we talk about games and stuff. Alex is good at fantasy, Anish isn't, and they're both bad at Survivor Pools. What else do we need to say? In all seriousness, though, (just kidding - it's physically impossible for us to be serious) this was a big week for Anish and the miscellaneous; it likely was a big week for all you listeners, too, because the trade deadline passed in many fantasy leagues. So that means if you didn't trade them or drop them, you're stuck with all your garbage players!!! Anish made a pretty big splash, actually, to try keeping his playoff hopes alive... Tune in to find out who he gave up and who he got in return. 

Alex is on a flight back to Duke from Chicago, so you get me again. Hi, it's Anish. Please leave a message after the tone (anyone who gets this reference I will personally give $1). This is a (kind of) shorter episode. Well, guess what? We're going to start breaking up our usually longer episodes into shorter episodes, so be on the look out for a couple more this week! It was a week of muffed punts, so Alex told me to title it "Witcher 3: The Wild Punt," which is a reference to some random video game. You gaming nerds will probably know what he's talking about. We talk about a lot of cool stuff, just recapping last week's fantastic matchups. I finally get to celebrate the Packers being the favorites to win it all after a convincing win against the Rams, and some other stuff happens that doesn't really matter because all that matters is the Packers. Go Pack Go!

For Thanksgiving, we wanted to show our thanks to all y'all who listen to the podcast by putting out a short special episode. Perhaps the best part of this episode? No Anish!!! All jokes aside, Anish is not in on this special episode; Alex is here, though, and so is Rob in his second appearance as a guest. We spend the whole episode highlighting the gameday experience that was Ravens-Bears this past Sunday, which was attended in person by both of our featured Bears and Ravens experts. Tune in as they ponder football past and future for the respective franchises while also considering what they are currently thankful for, both on and off the field. Fire Nagy.

Unless we're dealing with an absolute garbage matchup like Lions-Steelers, every game has a winner and a loser. And while this is always true, some matchups are more defined by Team A winning and some are more defined by Team B losing. Whether the winners didn't do enough or the losers had particularly glaring mishaps, this week feels like a lot of the games were honestly defined by the losing teams. But in that largely underwhelming landscape, the truly elite performances stand out that much more. Jalen Hurts with 3 rushing touchdowns, Justin Jefferson with 2 in the air and almost 200 yards, Austin Ekeler with 4 touchdowns. But the true hero, perhaps the dark horse MVP of both fantasy and even real-life - Jonathan Taylor (Somehow, Alex literally has *all* these players on his fantasy team besides Hurts). JT had been grinding the past few weeks, but his play on Sunday against the Bills was truly next-level. The man almost single-handedly took down a team seen as a Super Bowl contender and made them look like clowns in the process. It's impossible to praise him too much at this point; that game was legendary. The same cannot be said about many games this week, but we do our best to highlight those that were worth watching: one rather interesting game we left out, though, was Ravens-Bears because we're releasing a special episode just on that matchup. Tune in to hear more about the other great performances of the week; other than that, Anish and Alex wanna wish y'all an awesome Thanksgiving. Don't let the turkey make you slower than Big Ben.

Hi... It's Anish. Alex couldn't write the description this week 'cause he's busy writing a paper. So you get to have me. What is this episode? Who knows! What do we talk about? Hard to say! But I did have my first losing week in weekly predictions this week, and I lost in fantasy 'cause of fucking Matt Ryan. Fucking bitch. Never again. This week was full of upsets across the slate, and we're gonna take a closer look at some of them. But maybe my fantasy season is the biggest upset of them all. At least my AJ Dillon strategy finally worked out; in your face, Alex. Anyways, fuck Matt Ryan and leave a message after the tone. Beeeeeep. P.S. Hey it's Alex now. I totally tricked Anish because I just wanted to see what crap he'd write up, but I honestly loved the energy so maybe he should do this more often. If you didn't get a chance to read his original description, though, I cut out like half of it and cleaned it up a bit too because it was agonizing to read. Almost as bad as watching Steelers-Lions.  P.P.S. Still Alex. I'm not a huge fan of quote-unquote "trigger warnings" - that's right: I absolutely wanted you to hear "quote-unquote" in your head even though this is written: I am an absolute prodigy of rhetoric. Anyways, despite my opinion, I did think I should put out a quick disclaimer. My heart goes out to Ron Rivera. I just generally have a dark/edgy/cringy sense of humor at times; I lowkey feel like I might've crossed a line this time so I just wanted to be upfront before y'all blow up my DMs. Many of us have dealt with cancer affecting our loved ones, and that has certainly been a huge factor in my life. We all cope differently with trauma and I often do it with intense jokes. My sincerest apologies if you find discomfort with the grieving process when it takes that form.

As much as we love football, we also know it can go wrong very quickly. Whether it's injuries or simply chaos, we want to keep the game as clean and safe, and enjoyable as possible, which is why we need rules. In turn, we need officials to enforce those rules; even if we don't like the actions of referees - especially those that completely interrupt the flow of the game - regulation is a necessary evil. HOWEVER, the disgraceful reffing from this past MNF is unforgivable. Alex is obviously especially enraged as a Bears fan, but the entirety of social media has come to a consensus that the Bears-Steelers matchup was simply one of the worst, most biased games from an officiating standpoint in NFL history. Yet the league is seemingly going to do nothing about it. The refs stole the game from the Bears, and they're not even gonna get a slap on the wrist (just tune into the podcast if you wanna hear Alex's entire mental breakdown over this game). MNF was the worst, but penalties seemingly have over-plagued the league this week and also season more generally. Officiating is hard to get perfect; we get that mistakes happen. But too much unnecessary interference by the referees is ruining games and making them less fair despite refs only existing to ensure fairness. Whether things are fair or unfair, though, we have to accept the facts. The 2021 NFL season is now halfway over, so check out this episode to hear Anish and Alex break down all the important developments of the week as we're now deeper into the playoff hunt. The Bears most likely will not be one of those teams, but we'll have to wait to see if the Bears can blame that on the officials, too.

We're 8 weeks into the season, but we just experienced a very dramatic turn of events this week. Derrick Henry and Jameis Winston are out for the year, the Rams just added Von Miller, and Geno Smith finally got a win. The biggest story of all, though, might be the legendary emergence of Mike White. We don't know if he'll be the Jets quarterback moving forward, but he will start next week for sure. And even if he doesn't start again, he's certainly left his mark on the league and in our hearts. He's not the only backup doing everything he can to step up, though; besides him and Geno, Cooper Rush and Trevor Siemian also stepped in for injured starters and got the wins their franchises desperately needed. That's the beautiful thing about football: so many guys who get overlooked over their careers sometimes just need one chance to prove everyone wrong and leave their mark. We see it every year, and we've even already seen it time and time again this season, but this week, in particular, captured that principle so perfectly. It's why we love football. ANY. GIVEN. SUNDAY. Tune in to hear what else happened on Sunday, and you're in for a special treat this Halloween season as we feature Cary - a name that should sound familiar - as our second guest of the year!

Week 7 of the NFL is in the books, but it feels like we're only just now starting to tackle the core of the NFL season. It's taken almost 2 months, but now we can start to truly assess how good different teams and players are. Are the Chiefs even a playoff team now, let alone a championship contender? Are the Cardinals truly the best team in the league? Are the Lions truly the worst? Records don't mean everything, but they definitely say a lot; perhaps this is most telling when you look at them piece-by-piece like when the Panthers and Broncos both started 3-0 but have since gone 0-4. If teams want a shot at changing their identities, next week's trade deadline might be their last chance. As questions loom over the futures of Sam Darnold and Tua Tagovailoa, will either of their teams try winning the Deshaun Watson sweepstakes? Anish and Alex are idiots, so don't expect them to have the answers, but tune in to hear their stupid opinions/predictions and maybe laugh a few times along the way!