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Guy Shrink

Author: Bill Roman

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Welcome to Guy Shrink, a bi-weekly podcast where we discuss guy stuff, hosted by Bill Roman, MA, LPC. You know, the stuff that rolls around in your head, keeps you up at night, gives you heartburn and sometimes makes you say, “what was i thinking?” We've all been there, and at times we stay there longer than we intended and certainly longer than what’s good for us.

Bill is a Licensed Professional Counselor, in Toledo, Ohio - the Glass City, where most of his practice is devoted to men who are trying to figure out life’s big questions and little annoyances. On the show, Bill will interview people who can offer a voice and opinion about what’s bothering us. "I want to talk about stuff that never in a million years would we seek out a therapist for but we might open up to a buddy. I’m pretty well-convinced life is more than a DIY project."

If what you hear is helpful or even annoying let me know by dropping me a line at bill @ guy shrink .com or check out the website. Also, if you’ve got a problem and want some help, let me know, too. All mail is confidential so you’ll never have to worry about getting outed. `So, listen up as you’re working out, driving the car, or just sitting down.
25 Episodes
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Jim Herrington is an inspirational voice of authority in the millions of other voices claiming leadership knowledge. Jim has a significant track record of over four decades of sustained, creative, and engaged transformational leadership in the most precarious of places—the church. His career spans the work of a pastor, author, conference leader, coach, and podcast producer. He teams up with Trish Taylor on the highly successful podcast The Leader’s Journey.  Jim and Bill talk about how to equip people to grow in their capacity of emotional intelligence, adapt to change, and work for the common good. Most of us suffer from “infobesity”—too much fattening information; Jim and Bill present ways to slim down infobesity into effective practice. Take notes as you listen to this and share it with a friend.
In the middle of the night have you ever wrestled with the thought that the world would be better off without you? Do you ever feel like you have to pretend you’re not broken and pray that your struggle doesn’t get passed onto your kids as the family legacy? Do those midnight ghosts haunt you with the message that you’re so messed up beyond any hope of figuring life out? Bullseye! You’re not alone, ever. Joe Reid has been there so many times he’s lost count. In this GuyShrink episode, he and Bill talk about how to make that daily struggle of more than barely making it to a rigorous climb up to real mental health. Joe has authored the unique Mental Health Scale that these two guys will explore and make practical use of. Joe is the author of the honest, raw and authentic book, Broken Like Me. This is no self-pity conversation but one that can empower every man. After you listen, you’ll have a first-class toolkit to help you thrive. Find out more about Joe Reid and his resources by visiting https://www.broken-people.org/ 
To be human is to be in relationships. Ugh. Red flag hoisted! We can’t survive without them but at the same time, it’s in our relationships that we can so easily get unraveled. This is the stuff that keeps a guy up at night. How to navigate the sticky wicket of significant others: wives, partners, spouses, along with parents, kids, coworkers, and friendships, is tough going. Dr. Jenny Brown, founder and now retired Executive Director of the Family Systems Institute in Sydney, Australia, joins Bill on this GuyShrink episode to talk about how to bring your best into all of life’s relationships. Speaking through solid experience Jenny will cause you to take a deep look at the ways you present yourself in all the places where you show up. She offers no quick fixes nor 5 easy tips to win, but her words will speak directly to wherever you might be in your life’s journey. Her book Growing Yourself Up is the best guide out there to do just that. We thoroughly enjoyed this interview and know you will, too.
As a successful varsity baseball player Todd learned early on that baseball, alone in sports, considers error as part of the game, part of its rigorous truth. Todd joins Bill in this episode to discuss how this truth gets played out in his own life and in his thriving practice as a life coach. Part of this conversation will take listeners down the road to consider that your personal life vision and mission can move beyond present circumstances and that you can enjoy a life that is more than just OK. Focusing on the three ideas of curiosity about where you are; developing self-regulation; and hanging in there with perseverance, will empower you to do more than just learn from mistakes but how to use misfortune as the platform from which to launch a fulfilling life. Here’s another GuyShrink episode worth listening to several times.
As a young man, Tony’s mom told him: “Never lose what makes you YOU.” At age 13 that unique young man began a torturous journey of self-destructive behavior and near hopelessness. For three years Tony was the victim of sexual abuse and the traumatic trail it leaves for all. Ruminating on pain and revenge was a lethal cocktail that led him to drug and alcohol abuse as a way to smother the rage. Today Tony is more than a survivor, he is a resilient warrior for others in pain and sorrow. In this episode, Bill and Tony talk heart to heart, and Tony’s blunt honesty speaks volumes of hope and the personal cost to not just survive, but to thrive and build a life of meaning and purpose. You will want to listen to this whole conversation several times.
Josh Bowen is the principal broker and owner of LaPlante Real Estate in Toledo where he and his team craft an expanded vision of real estate as an ethical arena where the right choices help communities to grow in healthy and functional ways. Duty and Responsibility are Josh’s two guiding principles that lead him to view his three clients of owners, renters, and community, as a small town of over 8000 people. Bill and Josh discuss his personal journey through some tough ordeals and the small choices that make a big difference. They also talk about Stoicism as a discipline to help us get that life and recommend Ryan Holiday’s podcast The Daily Stoic and Ryan’s books. This episode will open your thought world to consider the impact you can make in your own little realm of influence and the daily habits needed to enhance a fulfilling life.
Matt Kutz is a professor of athletic training at Florida International University, and former professor at Bowling Green State University in Ohio, and a Fulbright Scholar in Rwanda. Matt and Bill have an enjoyable info-packed conversation about Contextual Intelligence as a proven way to resolve complexity and ambiguity in our decision-making. Matt goes a long way to help us think about our thinking and this episode is peppered with some funny stories, deep original thinking and lots of practical direction for those racing thoughts in our heads Enjoy.
RICHARD FERNANDEZ, PT, DPT. is a licensed physical therapist who works in a hospital-based outpatient orthopedic clinic in Toledo. He is a gifted and innovative clinician who believes that his job is less about solving a patient’s problems and more about coaching him to navigate the inconsistencies of pain that many of us use to define our identity. Richard and Bill talk about the gift of pain and how we can use that physical intrusion to lead us to a new understanding of ourselves and our unique place in the world. This episode will captivate you and give you a refreshing perspective.
STEPHEN RIDELLA, Ph.D. is the Director of the Office of Defect Investigation for the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration of the Fed.  Yep, he’s the seat belt guy, always looking out for consumer safety on the highway.   He is also a major thought leader in engineering organizations whose personal commitment to excellence helps form new strategies and policies for the good of all.   Stephen and Bill get down to the nitty-gritty about a subject near and dear to both of these men---growing up and being a man of integrity and goodwill.   The added gem to all this is that these two guys have known each other their whole lives as first cousins.  
KATHLEEN SMITH, PhD. is the author of the supremely enjoyable book, Everything Isn’t Terrible, offering some down-to-earth, humorous, and very practical advice on managing your anxieties and fretting. She is a licensed therapist working in the most anxious city in America, Washington, DC. She is an associate faculty member at the Bowen Center for the Study of the Family, also in DC. Kathleen and Bill chat about calming one's self down and taking charge of one's responses to life’s curveballs. We had a lot of fun on the episode and can guarantee that just by listening to her talk, you will find yourself in a new headspace. Enjoy!
Ziad Burkett is the founder of Toledo, Ohio-based Midwest Juicery. Founded in 2016, Midwest Juicery was created out of Ziad's own personal health journey, entrepreneurial career ambitions, and desire to be his own boss. Six years later and Midwest Juicery is one of the premier options for cold-pressed juice throughout the midwest. Ziad and Bill talk about personal health and what it's like to be an entrepreneur in today's burgeoning health and wellness industry.
Arlyn is a retired clergyperson living in Tucson, but previously made his home in Iowa. He and his wife Wanda were good friends of Bill and his wife, having gone to school together. Wanda passed away in 2017 after a long battle with cancer. In this episode, Arlyn and Bill talk about the love journey Arlyn undertook with Wanda’s terminal illness, her eventual death, and his road of mourning and grief. This is an episode that discusses the inevitable defining moment something we all must face.
J. Brent Bill is an American author of Quaker spiritual literature. He is a graduate of Wilmington College and Earlham School of Religion and has worked as a pastor and writing coach.  He and his wife live at Ploughshares Farm, fifty acres of Indiana farmland being reclaimed for native hardwood and prairie grasses.  Brent and Bill discuss golf as a spiritual practice—how men need activity in their lives to be in touch with the deeper meaning of living.  Both of these guys met in college and worked together in journalistic adventures. 
TIM LUSCH — Self-described as a recovering attorney, Tim is a provocative writer and reviewer for several national journals and local magazines. He is one of Bill’s favorite intellectual sparring partners and one of his closest friends. Together they talk about Resistance and the necessity of having a disciplined life to accomplish worthwhile things.
Chris and Bill talk about wrestling with our untapped potential and how many of us leave the scene with most of our song still inside. Fear is the number one face of Resistance and Chris gives some clear advice about how to charge through that, He also offers his personal de-stress plan that can be tried out today as you listen.
Home for the holidays? Ugh. Already the pit is forming in your stomach. And instead of visions of sugarplums dancing in your head, there is the gnawing dread of a déjà vu—another emotionally-driven holiday with family and friends. What to do? Instead of avoiding it why not embrace the opportunity to try out some new behavior? I am suggesting ten ideas for taking care of yourself differently these next few weeks. Test-drive some of them out and see if you can manage yourself in a new and better way. "The less a person understands his own feelings, the more he will fall prey to them. The less a person understands the feelings, the responses and the behaviors of others, the more likely he will interact inappropriately with them and therefore fail to secure his proper place in the world." --Howard Gardner, Harvard Prof of Education and Cognition
DAN SCHAEFER—is a licensed clinical psychologist in Ohio working with a varied clientele, especially men who are struggling through chapters in life. He loves outdoor sports like kayaking and when indoors, wrestling. Being from Pittsburgh he was fated to be a Steelers fan. Dan and Bill talk about friendships, with a focus on how to “fire a friend.”
Bill and Nate Walke talk discuss what it takes to not be afraid of a new idea. Nate Walke is a serial entrepreneur, founder of Futuristic Design Agency, HyperloopX, Backpacks For Humans, Code City, and many more - so as you can probably guess, Nate isn't afraid of attacking new ideas. However, most people aren't this way. Learn the secrets around what it takes to start something new on this episode of Guy Shrink.
LARRY GODFREY— A retired executive at General Motors has traveled and taught worldwide focusing on leadership and personal growth. Presently he is a professor at a local university teaching psychology, business leadership, and personal development. Larry is particularly passionate about positive psychology and critical thinking that can bear on our present age. He and Bill talk about civility, a much-needed attribute in our world today, and how guys can be a positive energy in our world.
KATHLEEN CAULEY—is a private practice social worker therapist in the Washington DC area and a faculty member at the Bowen Family Center in DC. She brings humor, insight, and challenge to our thinking about how men relate within their respective families. Her words are timely and filled with energy. She and Bill have worked together for several years and both regard Bowen Family System Theory as a helpful way to think about the ties that bind us all together.
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