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Insane Marriage Stories - Tales from the Pandemic
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© Insane Marriage Stories
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Marriage is the most challenging thing I've ever done. Even insane. Hear my stories, share your own.
23 Episodes
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April 1 really is a fool's day. At least that's what I felt like after trusting my attorney. He canceled our court date. Then he told me that if I wasn't happy with his representation, I can go find another attorney and it wouldn't hurt his feelings. What an ass! So I fired him. Attorney number 3 down the toilet. Looks like I'm in this shit for an extra, extra long time. Fuck!
Perhaps I'm overly sensitive. Maybe I'm the one with mental issues. Also, alternative perspectives about BPD & NPD.
Another recording I had not shared. Thankfully I'm in a better place now than I was then. Still isolated. But not as angry.
This is an older recording I had not shared yet. My attorney actually helped me get temporary orders put in place. And other miscellaneous parts to this ongoing dilemma.
Sometimes it feels like every fiber of my being wants to go back to my wife. But then i remind myself that I'm tired of being taken for granted. Unappreciated. Insulted. Put down. Laughed at. Then I feel guilty. It feels like I abandoned her. It's not a pleasant feeling. At all. Am I still in love with her?
Had a twilight zone moment earlier today imagining a family reconciliation. Even my barber took the words out of my mouth. She's not gonna change. Or perhaps I'm the one that's being unreasonable. Whatever. Never again.
My 12yr wedding anniversary was yesterday, Sept 13. I hope it's the last one.
And my instagram friend Jonah Hill was about to hit me up for money to support a children's charity, so I blocked his fake ass.
Been feeling mighty grumpy. Don't want to be the typical grumpy old man.
I suddenly realized that, subconciously, I've been arguing with my wife. Everyday. I've been having imaginary arguments.
No wonder I've been grumpy. What a waste.
So I decided to re-start my morning exercise routine and acts of gratitude as a means towards spending my thoughts on positive thoughts.
Suddently, Jonah Hill starts chatting with me on Instragram.
It brought me back to my journals when he interviews his therapist Stutz.
He talks about your life force and how work to grow it. Start with exercise, journaling, and keeping friends.
Remember that story about the Indian woman that got her face bitten by a rattlesnake? All it could say was, "You stupid bitch. You knew I was a snake."
I'm like a broken record about forgiving, trying again and failing. Do I like being mistreated? No. Am I co-dependent? I don't think so. So WTF?! Maybe if I start jiu jitsu like most of my favorite podcasters say to do. LOL! Been sitting on this episode for a while now. I got another story to tell, so it's time to put this one out there.
Almost 2 years of marital conflict and no resolution in sight. It's very tiring. Don't give up the fight.
Someone told me years ago that reading the bible would make you go insane. Just saying. In this episode I mention cps which is the electric utility city public service, not the other motherfuckers.
Today I give some background to my first stories and tie it into what happened today. Disclaimer - around the 20:44 mark I say today is March 27th. Oops. It's actually Feb 27th.
When life gives you lemons, put on your favorite motivational speaker or movie or whatever. Always keep moving forward. Nobody's coming to save you. Never, ever, ever give up.
I don't care about the things she says anymore. I care that she's not well and I don't know how to help her.
Guilty until proven innocent. Maybe. Not likely. Nevermind. Guilty!
Does a new wedding ring count towards alimony? Or do we cut it in half?
Letting go of anger with the help of an excellent book. I'll share one of my favorites and read a few paragraphs.
How can a person begin to think they're right about everything all the time? As well as be completely blameless for anything and everything? F* my life two times!!
There seems to be a youtube trend for top X reasons why this or that. Figured I'd give it a try. After all, this is about trying to find some humor in the situation as my world is falling apart around me. Yay.
Never admit it. Ever. Always deny, deny, deny. If I said it, then it wasn't that bad. If it was, then you'll get over it. And if not, then it was your fault anyway. See how you are?
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