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The Hook Up

Author: triplej

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The Hook Up is about love, sex and relationships. We answer your questions, learn things together, cry over heartbreak and normalise shit. Every Tuesday Dee and Pip debate your dating dilemmas and hear your cooked stories. Every Thursday it's the sex ed you never had — we call on an expert to go deep and find answers with Dee.
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What does the kinda porn you’re into mean? Is it just a fantasy or is it deeper than that?And how do you deal with feelings of shame and guilt if what you like to get off to, doesn’t align with who you are in your everyday life. In this ep, Dee chats to sexologist Lauren French about what your porn taste says about you. SHOW NOTES:Lifeline: 13 11 141800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732 MensLine Australia: 1300 78 99 78 Qlife (Queer support services): 1800 184 527Pornaddiction.com: PornAddiction.com Sex Addiction Australia: https://www.sexaddictionaustralia.com.au/RELATED EPISODES:What Kind Of Porn Are You Into?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWABwwal8II&list=PLFqO_oqoHHMzFwCWPXOj6CDpOdG3eS8cE&index=1DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Sometimes what turns you on can throw you for a loop. Maybe you’re straight but love gay porn? Or maybe you consider yourself a staunch feminist, but you get off watching gangbangs or reading CNC smut books? In this episode we find out all the different types of porn you’re loving, and whether your taste in porn aligns with your sexuality, gender and politics.*Content warning* - In this ep we discuss genres of porn that might be confronting to some. We'll be asking follow up questions in our next ep with an expert.DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Heated Rivalry is one of the hottest, most popular shows right now. So what is it about Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov that's got so many gay men AND women obsessed? We unpack the Canadian 8 episode HBO series with comedian, and host of The Mitch Churi Show, Mitch Churi - and hear why this series has become a cultural turning point for queer love stories.SHOW NOTES:The Mitch Churi Chat Show: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClC22mpuIS85Tj_-U-ENqpgDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
It sounds great on paper - a friend who you have no-strings-attached, drama free sex with. But is it really possible, and is it worth trying? We hear your experiences with FWB relationships - from when they’ve worked to when they’ve crashed and burned - and your rules to make a successful friends with benefits.DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Is your partner a massive scroller? Always on their phone for work? Obsessed with watching videos? Being on your phone too much in a relationship can massively impact your connection and intimacy. It’s something professor Dr Michelle Drouin has been studying for years. In this ep, she chats to Dee about her research and how you can chill out on the phone use in your relos. SHOW NOTES:Dee and Pip vodcast episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dU_nIC10ptgDr Michelle Drouin - professor of psychology at Purdue University Fort Wayne and research scientist at Parkview Health: https://www.drmichelledrouin.com/Book: Out Of Touch - How To Survive An Intimacy Famine DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Nearly 70% of you reckon that phones are causing problems in your relationships. From etiquette and icks in early dating, to feeling distant and causing tension with your long term partners - we explore how they’re impacting our love lives, whether they can create intimacy and your rules to curb your “smartphone addiction” (if that’s even a real thing).SHOW NOTES:Phone Addiction: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/ng-interactive/2024/jan/03/what-is-phone-addiction-definition-science-debateDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
We're back!!! Dee and Pip yap about their summers. Guess who was sick and who partied non stop. They also debrief Heated Rivalry and let you know what's coming up this year with The Hook Up.DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
ICYMI: Whether it’s for friendship, therapy or sexual and romantic relationships, AI companions are becoming way more normalised. So what does this mean for the way we relate and date people irl? We investigate the rise of AI relationships and hear how you’re using it in your own love lives.CW: discussion of mental health and suicideSHOW NOTES:Mental health and AI companionshttps://www.abc.net.au/news/2025-01-07/ai-chatbot-husbando-waifu-relationships-romance-psychology/104701556Reddit - My Husband Wants To Open Our Marriage To His AI Girlfriend https://www.reddit.com/r/AmIOverreacting/comments/1ltm60b/aio_my_35f_husband_36m_wants_to_open_our_marriage/Can ChatBots Substitute Real Human Romance?https://theconversation.com/computer-love-ai-powered-chatbots-are-changing-how-we-understand-romantic-and-sexual-well-being-234054NY Times podcast - She Fell In Love With ChatGPT https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tXmc_cYW9Y14 Year Old Boy Takes His Life After AI Chatbot Encourages Himhttps://www.theguardian.com/technology/2024/oct/23/character-ai-chatbot-sewell-setzer-deathAI Companion inciting Sexual violence, abuse, terror attackshttps://theconversation.com/an-ai-companion-chatbot-is-inciting-self-harm-sexual-violence-and-terror-attacks-252625DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
ICYMI: If you’re not feeling great mentally, or you want to work through some things, or you’ve just gone through a big life event - you might be thinking about getting some professional help. Starting therapy can feel super overwhelming if you’ve never done it before, so in this ep we chat to clinical psychologist Dr Jarrod White about everything you need to know about going to therapy for the first time. SHOW NOTES:Dr Jarrod White - Beyond Therapy Room  The Body Keeps The Score - Bessel Van Der Kolk The Courage To Be Disliked - Ichiro Kishimi, Fumitake Koga Lost Connections - Johann HariDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Keen to have a threesome for the first time but duno how to go about it?Dee chats to sexologist Laura Lee about all the different ways you can have a threeway. SHOW NOTES:How Are You Having Threesomes? VOD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7El-yUPxPMw&t=3sDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
So you wanna get back with your ex. It’s a pretty universal experience and you told us heaps of reasons why you tried to rekindle the relationship - whether it’s emotional dependency, needing closure or the whole “it’ll be different this time!”. We hear your stories from when it’s worked, when it hasn’t, and if there’s a formula to getting it right. SHOW NOTES:Should You Get Back With Your Ex or Move On?: https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/getting-back-together-with-ex-break-up-move-on-liz-neal/105749268DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Have you ever dated someone who's family was too involved, or a bit too close? Whether it’s your own or your partners - we hear how families with no boundaries, cultural/religious differences, and mummy’s boys/daddy’s girls have messed with your love life.SHOW NOTES:An Expert’s Advice For Dealing With Toxic Families: https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/families-no-boundaries-toxic-relationships-dr-lillian-nejad/105154746DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
We’re coming to the end of a massive year covering all things love, sex, dating and relationships here on The Hook Up. From the male loneliness epidemic and the rise of AI relationships, to the rise of ENM, performative males, fake doms and boyfriends being embarrassing - we recap all the trends in news and pop culture that got you talking, plus hear your fav eps from 2025!SHOW NOTES:Hack story on AI Relationship study on relationshipshttps://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/hack/ai-chatbots-accelerating-loneliness-epidemic/105931188Is Being A Pick Me Or Performative Male Problematic?https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/is-being-a-pick-me-or-performative-male-problematic-/105889546How To Actually Have A Good Threesomehttps://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/how-to-have-a-threesome-tips-sexologist-find-unicorn-third-sex/105315188Do I Have A Sex/Porn Addiction?https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/sex-porn-addiction-sex-addict-heide-mcconkey-compulsive-sexual-/105895896How Often Should I Be Having Sex?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQ35yOTAfyo&list=PLFqO_oqoHHMzFwCWPXOj6CDpOdG3eS8cE&index=9How To Deal With Mismatched Libidohttps://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/mismatched-libidos-different-low-sex-drives-laura-lee-sexologist/105812842Is Everyone ENM Now?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9L7gf5TR5QHow To Do Non-Monogamy Ethicallyhttps://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/open-up-relationship-ethical-non-monogamy-chris-cheers-polyamory/105506070Why Are There So Many Fake Doms?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngg8KHqrSgoPeriod Farts, Cum Headaches & The Science Of Kinks w/ Dr Evahttps://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/science-week-sex-questions-fertility-periods-orgasms-libido-kink/105616942Science Of Squirting And How To Do Ithttps://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/science-squirting-orgasm-ejaculation-how-to-squirt/105643192DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
If your friend is dating someone that sucks, or is downright toxic - what’s the best way to let them know? In this ep, you’ll hear from psychologist Liz Neal about how to tell someone you love that you don’t like their partner and what to do if your friend pushes you away.  SHOW NOTES:1800 Respect: 1800 737 732 Liz Neal Website: https://www.elizabethneal.com.au/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
We’ve all had a friend who’s dated someone you don’t like - but is it ever your place to say something? We find out whether you should tell them (early? When you’re asked? Or not at all??), find the difference between not liking their partner vs they’re bad for your friend and why you reckon it’s important to stick around even if your friend's got rose coloured glasses on.SHOW NOTES:Lifeline: 13 11 141800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732 DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Sex toys are an amazing way to explore pleasure and discover your sexuality - but there’s still a lot of stigma, especially when bringing them into partnered sex or if you struggle to climax without one. We chat to sex educator Georgia Grace about how to work through any internalised toy shame, and how to introduce them if you (or your partner) feel awkward.Note: we experienced some technical issues during this recording which have impacted audio quality, but feel the chat too good not to share!DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Sex toys have become more accessible and normalised than ever before, but are they making your love life better? From vibrators, dildos and fleshlights to floggers, whips and gags, we hear how you’re using them with partners, we unpack vibrator shame, and discuss how the sexual wellness trend is packaging products and pleasure.SHOW NOTES:Men are buying more sex toys:https://www.bodyandsoul.com.au/relationships/sex/men-are-now-buying-more-sex-toys-than-women/image-gallery/765abe10019cb43713c9f7cfcd75adf0Sexual wellness industry stats:https://www.fortunebusinessinsights.com/sexual-wellness-products-market-110030DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
Some people say one of the most important decisions you’ll make is the person you choose to marry. So how can you make sure you’re ready to tie the knot, and that they’re the partner for you?We chat to couples therapist Isiah McKimmie to find out the ‘must ask’ questions - you should be asking yourself and each other. SHOW NOTES:Isiah McKimmie Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/isiahmckimmie.sexologist/?hl=enIsiah McKimmie Details: https://isiah-mckimmie.com/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
It’s been a year of engagements and tying the knot for some of the biggest pop stars in the world, like Charli XCX, Lana Del Ray, Dua Lipa and Taylor Swift. And despite it being one of the oldest and most traditional ways to commit to a partner - research shows young people are more keen on getting wed than the generation before us. We hear how you feel about marriage, and whether it’s something you still wanna do.
Actor Zoe Terakes (Talk To Me, Nine Perfect Strangers, Marvel’s Ironheart) is reclaiming Ancient Greek mythology in their debut novel Eros: Queer Myths For Lovers.In this episode, Zoe chats with Dee about why so many of the iconic Greek myths - from Zeus and Aphrodite to Icarus and Hermaphroditus - are really stories of queer and trans life, lust, sex, and revenge. And why it’s so important to reclaim these tales that celebrate all types of love and bodies. SHOW NOTES:Zoe Terakes Insta: https://www.instagram.com/zoeterakes/?hl=en Eros: Queer Myths For Lovers: https://www.hachette.com.au/zoe-terakes/eros-queer-myths-for-loversDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.
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Comments (15)

Darcy MC

Back to comment again, ironic that both regular hosts have a height fetish, a great personality trait you share with corporate board rooms, yikes.

Nov 13th
Reply

Mahya Bayat

I enjoyed this talk like other talks of wonderful Esther Perel! “Dating apps are for love stories not life stories” 👏🏻

Jan 22nd
Reply

Darcy MC

How can you have a fragile ego from an immutable characteristic? Women with shit takes like that unironically cause blackpilled incels.

Nov 9th
Reply

Laurie

I have a new boyfriend of 7 months, we’re long time friends so because we’re in a long distance relationship (6 hours to travel to him or the opposite, longer with bus, but not much) and I’m 42, he’s in his 40s too. I can’t sleep in the same bed, I have insomnia and nightmares from trauma so sleep is hard, he’s fine with us cuddling before sleep and for intimacy we can be in any beds. It would also be triggering to sleep with someone... I’m in Canada, I wish I could call in but Australia , is there a way to call in the show from an online platform? I love your show and discussions.

Feb 16th
Reply

Laurie

I’m incontinent and have been for years, I’m early 40s, my issues are medically linked to the decades of violence from my parents. I haven’t told my boyfriend yet, I want to talk about it in person

Feb 16th
Reply

Laurie

That was amazing to be able to talk more cleatly with my boyfriend of 7 months, friend of 8 years, long distance and pandemic so we haven’t kissed or hold each other. This was a good episode, I subscribed to the podcast, thanks for starting a discussion that as a 42 yrs old young woman. 😉

Feb 16th
Reply

rohan caddick

I heard the other day on the radio that you were going to have an episode about being too full to bang and some other stuff. then the miscarriage episode came out??

Nov 29th
Reply

Halo Man

you're dating a woman who doesnt peg you? im sorry king, you deserve better 😭👑

Jun 17th
Reply (3)

cath@cost

I’ve lived with this forever but didn’t have a name for it until my late 30s. 50% of my life is taken up with severe depression and then as soon as a period hits happy days. Incredibley frustrating. Thankyou for your episode ❤️❤️ bringing it to to light.

Feb 18th
Reply

Tayler Smith

what is that first sound track in the first few minutes? big NRE need

Sep 2nd
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Adam Dawson

.,................................ .......................................... .......................................................................................................................6

Aug 21st
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RyRyan Musgrave

rap music

Apr 4th
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