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Refs Need Love Too

Author: David Gerson

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An honest perspective from the 3rd team on the pitch... the referees. Through humor, analysis and education, we are slowly changing how people view referees and officials in all sports. We care and have a love for the game as much as any player or coach. Sometimes even more. Youth soccer (proper football) is a multi-billion $ industry in the US. Tremendous money is spent on players, competitions, travel etc., but almost nothing spent on developing the next generation of referees. I hope that this Podcast inspires, educates and humanizes the next generation of referees for their own development and appreciation from the players, coaches and spectators they need to work alongside. 

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Have you ever left a youth soccer game feeling furious at the referee? It's a familiar scene: parents and fans seething on the sidelines, convinced the referee has 'robbed' their kids of victory. I'm David Gerson, and in this episode, I confront this blame game head-on, championing personal responsibility over misguided finger-pointing. Referees aren't the puppet masters of the game's outcome; it's the players and coaches who carve their destiny on the pitch. I share my vexation with the slew of messages from disgruntled spectators and dissect the real factors that tip the scales in a match. It's a call to parents and coaches alike to instill resilience and accountability in our young athletes, fostering a mindset that values effort over excuses.Let's be honest, youth soccer isn't about the scoreboard; it's about growth, teamwork, and the sheer joy of the sport. As I walk you through the essentials of nurturing our future soccer stars, I stress the significance of developing fundamental skills, soccer intelligence, and the right attitude from the tender U8 to U12 levels. I tackle the toxic 'joysticking' habit of sideline coaching that stifles a child's decision-making skills and dims their passion for the game. Instead, I advocate for an environment that breeds respect, empowerment, and a genuine love for soccer. Join me as I steer the conversation toward a culture that celebrates effort and learning, and above all, upholds the integrity of the beautiful game.
Have you ever stood in the center of a storm, making split-second decisions that could turn the tide? Welcome to my world, David Gerson, where the whistle's blast is my thunder. This episode takes you behind the scenes of my state cup refereeing adventures, where I own up to my blunders and share the invaluable advice tossed my way. I've been polishing my craft with tips from the pros, like honing my whistle's melody and mastering strategic placement during set pieces. It's a journey of growth, spiced with a dash of humor – like how the Ref6 app saved the day when I forgot my marker.The pitch is my stage, and every game is a high-stakes drama with young athletes bringing their all. As I gear up to take the reins of a state cup semifinal, I reflect on the intricate dance of maintaining fairness in a world where not all players measure the same. This episode peels back the layers of complexity in the beautiful game, from scrutinizing the weight of each call to the nuanced balance of player safety against the thrill of uninterrupted play. Join me as I unravel the threads that tie together the heart-pounding moments of youth soccer.As the final whistle blows on the high school soccer season, I take a moment to savor the rich tapestry of community, rivalry, and tradition that it weaves. But it's not just a celebration of goals and victories; it's also an honest look at the ugly side of the sport, from confrontational fans to the heavy mantle of maintaining sportsmanship. And through the eyes of Joe Burns, I spotlight the unsung heroes – young referees like his daughter, who exemplify courage in the face of adversity. So, lace up your boots and let's march together through the trials and triumphs of those who uphold the spirit of the game.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Ever woken up drenched in sweat from a nightmare that felt too real? I'm David Gerson, and that's exactly how my day started before a state cup game, with a dream that left me shirtless and unprepared facing the assessor's daunting presence. Tune in as I recount this chilling referee nightmare and its roots in the true pressures of officiating. But it's not all about the stress; join me as I translate the rigorous discipline and communication prowess required on the soccer field to invaluable life lessons that can navigate you through any professional landscape.Let's talk the subtle art of handling critique and command—vital both on the pitch and in the boardroom. I share stories of managing tension with a cool head and a steady voice, even when fans and coaches are less than pleased. You'll hear how I've learned to maintain authority without sacrificing empathy, a balancing act that has served me well in life. If you've ever faced a crowd of dissent or the challenge of conveying bad news with grace, this episode packs insights that will sharpen your skills and bolster your professional playbook.In our final act, the spotlight turns to reliability and respect—bedrocks of a trusted reputation. I recount a moving tale of a listener, Chris from Colorado, whose return to refereeing, inspired by our very conversations, was met with the familiar hurdles of game management and dissent. Plus, I muse on our collective power to foster change in soccer and beyond, championing the best in ourselves and those we encounter. Whether you're a referee, a professional, or someone who values integrity, this episode is about leading with confidence and the power of a positive influence.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Emerging unscathed from a brush with mortality, I was slapped with the stark reality of life's fleeting nature. The terror of a near-fatal car accident evolved into an overwhelming torrent of gratitude, serving as the cornerstone of today's soul-stirring discourse. Beyond the harrowing tales of survival, I regale you with the triumphs of my professional world—from orchestrating a marketing campaign that soared beyond expectations to embracing the joy found in the whistle and flag of a soccer referee. The fusion of professional success and personal passion underscores this conversation, revealing the multifaceted nature of our pursuits and the profound fulfillment they can bring.The heart of this episode pulses with the vibrant community that's rallied around Refs Need Love 2, a channel no longer whispering but roaring with influence amidst the soccer world. Imagine the thrill as I recount my tête-à-tête with the captain of the US Women's National Team, and the humbling realization that our platform now echoes from Guam's shores to Zimbabwe's savannas. We peel back the referee's black-and-white exterior to explore the art of positioning and decision-making, which steers the ebb and flow of the beautiful game—a testament to the critical role these unsung heroes play in every match's unfolding drama.In an emotional crescendo, we unwrap the poignant narrative of Bob Smith, whose metamorphosis from soccer outsider to impassioned referee and coach mirrors the transformative power this sport wields. His story is a mosaic of dedication, learning, and the potent influence of positive communication. As the episode draws to a close, I reflect on the awe-inspiring resilience of our children, whose growth and independence often leave us parents awash with pride and gratitude. Today, we affirm the importance of voicing our appreciation, holding our loved ones close, and approaching each day with a heart brimming with hope.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Ever wondered how the web of youth soccer organizations operates in the U.S.? Tune in as Matt Bernard of US Club Soccer joins us to untangle the intriguing complexities of the system. Together, we scrutinize the unique roles of different entities, from local leagues to national powerhouses like the ECNL and National Premier League. Discover how these organizations affect the competitive youth soccer scene and what the explosion of leagues means for local communities. It's a revealing look into the heart of American soccer, where local decision-making and national affiliations converge.The landscape of youth soccer in America is a tapestry of challenge and opportunity, markedly different from the open pyramid system of English football. We delve into the absence of promotion and relegation in the U.S., examining its influence on club dynamics and the evolution of exclusive leagues that reshape community competition. Balancing the scales of development and competition, we address the financial pressures on clubs and families, the unseen hurdles of long-distance travel for games, and the critical learning curve for coaches in fostering a positive dynamic with referees.Referee abuse is a troubling stain on the beautiful game, and we confront it head-on with candid reflections on how the issue is being tackled—or sometimes ignored—within the soccer community. Through real-life stories and a robust discussion with Matt, we shed light on the urgent need for a national registry to track incidents, the role of State Referee Administrators in resolving such cases, and the strides leagues like ECNL are making in championing a culture of respect. This episode promises insights and solutions, advocating for a supportive, educated environment that protects the integrity and joy of soccer for all involved.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Ever wondered what drives a seasoned journalist like Kai Ryssdal to swap his microphone for a soccer referee's whistle? In an unexpected twist, Kai joins me to share his zest for the game and how the intellectual rigor and physical challenge of refereeing invigorate him. We navigate through the parallels of his media career and life on the pitch, uncovering the profound impact a referee can have on young athletes. His compelling narrative is a siren call to those pondering the whistle, highlighting the joys of community contribution and shaping the sport's future.As the conversation unfolds, we tackle the undervalued art of communication and empathy in coaching. My own journey in managing dissent on the field underscores the necessity for fostering an environment of respect, a point echoed in tales of pioneering policies from Southern California's AYSO to Utah's creative disciplinary actions. The raw realities of a referee strike in Los Angeles serve as a stark reminder of the high stakes in high school soccer and the often hidden complexities that referees navigate.Concluding on a reflective note, we address the striking imbalance between the professional demands placed on referees and their compensation, notably outside the top leagues. The perplexing handball rule comes under scrutiny, inviting a plea for clarity akin to the simplicity of Da Vinci's Vitruvian Man. And for a dash of star-studded charm, we reveal the delightful antics of public figures like Will Ferrell and Alexi Lalas, who don their stripes and grace the soccer fields of Southern California. My candid recount of a post-interview blunder with Kai rounds off the episode, a testament to the authentic moments that connect us all through our love of the game.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Ever wondered why football referees are often the unsung heroes of the beautiful game? Prepare to unravel the mysteries of the whistle with Adam Humphries from the Red or Yellow Refereeing podcast, as we explore the intricacies of football refereeing that go far beyond the rulebook. From the grassroots to the semi-pros, we dissect the practical learning curve officials face and the innovative ways they're connecting with the next generation through platforms like TikTok. Plus, we discuss the public's misconceptions about tackles and the unseen pressures that come with the job.Join us for a candid conversation about the significance of communication and the culture surrounding referees in the sport. Referees have more on their plate than just enforcing rules; they are integral in managing the match dynamics and shaping the respect within the game. We delve into the silent battles referees endure, the narratives spun by pundits, and how VAR is changing the game. It's a behind-the-scenes look at the high stakes, the swift decisions, and the need for football associations to step up and support their referees in the public arena.Rounding off our episode, we celebrate our tight-knit podcast community and the incredible bonds formed over shared passions. Adam and I reflect on the importance of engaging with our listeners, the thrill of exchanging ideas, and the collective joy that comes from connecting with fellow football and refereeing enthusiasts worldwide. It's a tribute to the power of dialogue and the ongoing conversation that keeps us all learning, growing, and appreciating every aspect of the game we love.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
As I stand on the brink of my 49th year, David Gerson here, I'm filled with an overwhelming sense of gratitude and an insatiable yearning for the next great adventure. This episode is all about celebrating those personal milestones and the intricate dance of soccer refereeing. I'm sharing my journey toward the big 5-0, contemplating the allure of solo trips to Iceland or Patagonia, and inviting you to weigh in with your travel pearls of wisdom. Plus, we unpack the contentious no-call from the League Cup final—a moment that sent shockwaves through the football world and a personal tale of a red card call that sparked a virtual firestorm.Navigating the turbulent seas of soccer officiating, I delve into the nuances that define the roles and responsibilities of a referee. From the unique vantage point of someone who's blown the whistle and waved the flags, I recount a day in the life that swings from being labeled the worst to the best referee—showcasing the impossibility of satisfying every sideline critic while maintaining the integrity of the game. I also reflect on the joys and challenges of mentoring budding referees, emphasizing the transformative power of clear communication and the enduring value of standing by your calls, no matter the pushback.Finally, in the spirit of supporting the unsung heroes of the pitch, I explore how empathy from parents and coaches can reshape our view of the referee's world. As I share my experiences with Soccer in the Streets and guiding new referees, we consider the indispensable role of mentorship in cultivating the next generation of officials. This episode is a tribute to the dedication of those who uphold the beautiful game's rules, and a call to recognize the critical awareness and quick decision-making our role demands. Join me as we celebrate the complexities and triumphs of the grassroots referee with heartfelt insights and engaging storytelling.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Have you ever witnessed the harsh realities young referees face within the beautiful game? Our latest discussion brings to the forefront the pressing need to shield our youth officials from escalating verbal abuse and to foster an environment of respect on the playing field. Sharing my own presentation for Soccer in the Streets, I delve into the steep learning curve and alarming dropout rates among young referees, underscoring the parallel necessity to safeguard them just as we would any young player. We lay out actionable strategies for sideline conduct, emphasizing the essential role of coaches and parents in creating a protective atmosphere for these budding arbiters of the game.The whistle blows, and immediately the outcry begins – but why is the dissent towards referees so ingrained in sports culture? In this heart-to-heart, we examine the concerning trend of referee dehumanization and the unsettling consequences it reaps. Sharing poignant anecdotes and reflecting on society's broader attitudes, we dissect why fans and coaches sometimes cross the line into abuse. The episode further underscores the impact of such behavior on young athletes and stresses the importance of modeling accountability. Through the lens of Officially Human, we're reminded of the imperative to recognize the humanity of referees and to approach the game with empathy and understanding.Concluding our impassioned narrative, we turn to the art of respectful communication in the sports arena. My personal guidelines for addressing referees without raising my voice are laid bare, serving as a blueprint for conflict resolution on the pitch. We discuss the power dynamics at play when adults interact with youth officials and how to engage in constructive dialogue that respects the officials' role in the game. This episode not only speaks to the essence of sportsmanship but also extends an invitation to coaches and parents to join us in educational endeavors, ensuring the next generation of referees, players, and spectators can enjoy a game marked by mutual respect and love for soccer.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Ever felt the pulse of the soccer pitch quicken at the flash of a referee's card? The introduction of IFAB's blue card might just send that pulse skyrocketing. Join me as I navigate the nuances of this game-changing decision and share my unique perspective gained from mentoring fresh-faced referees. We'll examine the blue card's intended role in penalizing offenses that aren't quite red, but more severe than yellow, and how this new element is stirring the pot across the soccer community. From the grassroots leagues to the grandeur of the FA Cup, the blue card is making waves, and we're here to ride them with you.Mentorship is the backbone of any thriving community, and the world of refereeing is no exception. On today's episode, I recount the recent certification of a group of budding referees, discussing the challenges they face and the essential support they require. I also open up about a harrowing incident of referee abuse, driving home the importance of safeguarding our enforcers of fair play. As we welcome a new VP of refereeing at US Soccer, it's a pivotal moment to advocate for the resilience and protection of those who don the whistle.Wrapping things up, we consider the future implications of the blue card on the sport's landscape. Reflecting on my classes with up-and-comers, I extend an invitation for your feedback and stories—especially if you've got sin bin experience to share. Remember, your support is what fuels this dialogue and helps us elevate the quality of content. Whether you're a seasoned referee, a newcomer to the scene, or a passionate supporter of the sport, this episode is a testament to the power of community and the spirit of the beautiful game.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
I had the honor and privilege to interview Peter Manokski, President of the PRSA. The PRSA is the Professional Referee Organizing body that represents MLS, USL, NWSL and CSA Referees. Recently, their membership has unanimously voted to authorize a strike if a deal is not made with PRO, their employer that represents the MLS.They are working to improve the working conditions for the referees. Many people have no idea the mental and physical burden of what it takes to be a professional referee. Especially, beyond the top of the top center referees, almost every other official is doing this as a part time job. The strain on them physically, financially and emotionally can be brutal for the many years it takes to make it to the top. I hope you enjoy this conversation and we would appreciate it if you will share it as far and wide as you can.Thank you!The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
I was absolute rocked to my core listening to a young referee describe the offensive verbal abuse she received at a High School Soccer match this past week in Southern California. Unfortunately,  these stories are far too common.In the moment, it can hard to tell what is common outbursts of emotion, dissent or OFFINABUS language. Additionally, it can be hard to summon the courage to confront that abuse head on. By discussing this and sharing this story, I hope we can all get stronger together.I've added a few LOTG hot takes and a nice letter from the mail bag to end this POD on a Positive note.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
This week we will look back at my personal  life as a referee in 2023, what I hope to achieve in 2024 and some of the new rule changes coming to the MLS next season . We'll end with a few notes from the mail bag.I wish you al the best in your upcoming 2024 season off and on the pitch! Happy New Year!The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Why can't we be more open with the considerations used by our best referees? Why can't we tell the general public? Why can't we do a better job of educating those we need to understand the laws of the game and how to apply them?It's time for referees and mentors to open up and bring other people in. It's time for clubs to invest resources in the referees who ref at their clubs. It's time for us all to do more to share our knowledge for the betterment of the game for everybody.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
I had so much fun yesterday reffing Futsal. It is similar in some ways to reffing soccer, but extremely fast paced and with some very unique rules. Although I had done it before, it has been a few years and there was quite a learning curve. If we want to speed up the game of soccer, we could learn a thing or two from our Futsal friends. It was non-stop action. I also will answer a letter from the mail bag about how reffing plays into my financial stability. It's not a full time job for me or 99% of referees, but it is a nice source of supplemental income. The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
A few weeks ago, I tried to pass the FIFA fitness test to become eligible for promotion to Regional. If you are not familiar, this is the next step in the path of promotion for referees here in the United States.On the same day, I also participated in the on-field training course needed to become a Referee Mentor. I am only a few weeks away from completing all of my assignments and getting my mentor certification.The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
Mistakes are learning opportunities. When we make a mistake, it gives us a chance to learn. All of the greatest athletes, entrepreneurs and and politicians have faced spectacular defeats and disappointments in their careers. That is not defines them though. Can you imagine if we let the Copa America and World losses that Messi experienced in his career define him? Crazy talk. He is the goat because who experienced painful losses and defeat and found a way to persevere!When we make mistakes, we should consider it valuable experience that will make us stronger and more resilient over time. The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
The work you do pre-game can prepare you for success during the game. Have a routine or just a mental checklist of good things to do before the first whistle can settle your mind and body and enable you to do your best during the match as a referee. The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
It's time to break down the massive VAR controversary that broke the internet a few weeks back. It was so avoidable, it hurts. I'm going to talk about how it could've been avoided and what contributed to all of the Liverpool controversies on the day.Additionally, I want to share the worst phrase you can say to me in Pre-game. It is almost always an indicator of a difficult match ahead. Lastly, we'll hit the mail bag. I got a doozy this week! ;->The Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
This week we'll go over the wonderful world of Middle School Soccer and many more topics including Body Cams and what I say in my pre-match conversation with players. . I sincerely enjoy getting to meet and interact with people from allover the world. If you have any questions for me, please send them to refsneedlovetoo@gmail.comThe Influence Factor by The Influencer Marketing FactoryTop 1% Podcast About Influencer Marketing, Creator Economy, Social Commerce and more.Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify
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