Crunch Wears No Pants

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THE TIMBERWOLVES BEAT THE NUGGETS BY 45 POINTS! ANT WAS INSANE! JADEN WAS THE MVP! KAT IS THE JOKIC STOPPER! RUDY IS RUDY! MIKE CONLEY IS BACK! 

Guys, the Minnesota Timberwolves may very well win an NBA Championship this year.

on today’s show, the gentlemen break down the advantages the Nuggets have over the Wolves, and vice versa. We also do an in memoriam segment for the fallen Phoenix Suns

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Five pods in seven days? Sure, why not. We're back to talk about JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS JADEN MCDANIELS 

Look guys, it happened. Kyle Theige joins the pod and we put him on the hot seat, previewed Game 2 of the Suns series, and went through the treasure chest of Wolves history during the Wolves Things Draft. You'll be shocked to hear this, but this episode is nuts. 

HELLO! EMERGENCY POD! The Timberwolves won Game 1 vs the Phoenix Suns today in the playoffs! The gentlemen go through the key performers and break down with they succeeded. We also heap praise on Kevin Durant cuz he's dope.

BONUS EPISODE PRESENTED BY LAMB CHOPS! We have two Suns fans in Panty Nation. One of them is on the show today: Auggie 5000! You remember him as the morning show host at Go 95.3, the modern hip hop channel, a radio station so good that the suits had to shut it down because money never bought good taste. Auggie takes us through six things he's identified as Suns weaknesses that the Timberwolves will exploit. He still thinks they will win the series and that's fine cuz he's a Suns fan so don't hold that against him. We also do RANDOM SUN WOLF OF THE WEEK as well as assemble the best starting five of players who played for both the Timberwolves and the Suns. Auggie is great. Everyone say "Thank you Auggie" for coming on the show.

Today, we discuss how Wolves twitter in in shambles over the Suns match up in the first round. Why do folks choose to be super negative? Feels like a bummer way to cheer for a team. The gentlemen also discuss how KAT's tenure as a Timberwolf lives and dies with this series. We also draft the best moon related things cuz we are an anti-Sun pod for the time being. Also at the end we discuss whether or not Penguins appear in the Bible. Idk man. 

It's a lot of Naz Reid talk on this episode. We dive deeper into the "NAZ SHOULD REPLACE KAT" talk taking over the timeline. We also discuss the work of cinematic genius that is Godzilla 2001 as well as if Godzilla is just a raging libertarian. Also, we suggest people who should own the Timberwolves besides Glen Taylor. Smaug from the Hobbit trilogy isn't one of them but does get mentioned. Love you, bye

AN OWNERSHIP DEBACLE! ANT IS SO GOOD! NAZ AND JADEN AND SLOMO ARE ALIVE! 

guys. remember when we used to release episodes regularly. we're getting back to that, i promise. On this week's episode, we discuss our life post-KAT injury, Ant's continued ascension, Luka Garza (sorry), and Dune. 

We're back with our second consecutive Random Wolf of the Week spotlight on Nikola Pekovic! These totally weren't pre-recorded during the Trail Blazers game on 2/15! Normal episodes begin again next week, but in the meantime enjoy this deep dive into the life, legacy, and lore of Nikola Pekovic.

SPECIAL EPISODE! We love highlighting the Random Wolves of the Week at the end of each episode so we figured we'd do some deeper dives into beloved Wolves throughout history. This week, we discuss the legacy and lore around COOL HAND LUKE RIDNOUR. 

Wolves twitter melted down over former and future guest of the pod Claire de Lune's 1 minute segment discussing the Timberwolves and KAT on another pod so we talked about it cuz we are white knights and simps. After that, we just bantered about how insanely good the Timberwolves are and then we did the fictional player buyout segment, where we add various fictional basketball players to the Wolves. 

We did one episode without a guest and we got bored so we invited our pal CHELANGA LANGASON FROM THE CND NBA SHOW to discuss why Kyle Anderson is secretly still good, the trade deadline's impact on the Wolves, potential buyout guys, and why Luigi is a bad person. Also, we snuck in a cats draft in celebration of Karl-Anthony Towns' fourth all star appearance. Some episodes are like this guys, idk what to tell ya. If you're still here from the Dane episode or Meatsauce episode we appreciate you lmao journalism is DEAD we only care about vibes now.

WOWOW KAT AND ANT ARE ALL STARS BAYBEEE. The gentlemen react to the news, as well as the current performance of the team. It's also our first episode since Guestuary so it's just us again. We also spend some time fawning over Nickeil Alexander-Walker before pitching trade targets in our Shark Tank Trade Machine segment. Love you so much! Don't drive stupidly in residential areas!

THE FINAL GUEST OF GUESTUARY IS CLAIRE DE LUNE! You've seen Claire on twitter, and perhaps you've heard her music as Tiny Deaths or read her basketball words with the Guardian. Speaking of, she just dropped an article about how the Timberwolves went from league laughing stock to legit championship contender. We discuss the Wolves with Claire, as well as her Lakers fandom*, the D'Angelo Russell experience, and how her artistry and journalism intersect. We also did our "Create a Band" draft, which is where we all made a band out of past and present NBA players. Claire is awesome and you better go show her some love cuz she's now forever intertwined with the lore of CWNP okay love you so much have a great weekend BYEEEE!

Dane Moore joined Crunch Wears No Pants to talk EVERYTHING. Does he like Hennessey? Who are his ideal trade targets as the deadline approaches (also this, predictably, is when Dane and Brandon go super deep, it was every ball-knowers dream conversation)? How has his podcast evolved over the last couple seasons? How are his vibes towards the team at the moment? What is the best NBA video game of all time?