Habits for Your Happily Ever After: Relationship Communication Advice

Is it easy for you to notice the things that feel good to you?Do you know your favorite texture of sheets against your skin? Do you know what weather makes you take a deep inhale when you step outside?Today let’s discuss how pleasure is the antidote to your exhaustion. You’ll hear:Five simple clues that help you recognize what pleasure feels like in your body.How to tell the difference between pleasure that fills you vs numbing that leaves you empty.How following your tiny “more, please” signals can guide you toward what makes you feel alive.Habit for Your Happily Ever AfterThis week’s habit for your happily ever after is to practice with the 5 pleasure prompts: Ooh! Ahh, mmm, ha! and more please.These days many people take a break and mindlessly scroll, shop, or eat. We do these things because we just need a break. Sometimes you don’t care if you’re numbing out: the break feels good. But numbing out isn’t restorative the way pleasure is.Date Night DiscussionI’ve collected 11 situations. Present each situation to your partner and ask them to respond with one of the prompts we discussed. You can also add words like eww or nope! if one of the scenes is a hard no for you.You might think I’m asking, “Do you like this or not,” but my question is a little more subtle. I’m wondering about the flavor of your response. When you notice flavors, you get a more nuanced connection to yourself and to your partner. That sort of noticing will build your pleasure muscles.Want more?Listen to this interview with Dr. Kirstin Hotelling Zona about how to cultivate pleasureConnect to Improve Your Relationship CommunicationVisit the show notes.Buy my book.Listen to my book.Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers.Follow me on Tik Tok.Follow me on Instagram.Reach me at 970-210-4480

Life is full. Maybe too full. So, how do you choose what to let go?What things are optional? What things are impossible to let go? How do you know the difference?Today we’re discussing how to choose what to let go when life is too full. You’ll learn:Why resisting the reality that it won’t all fit makes exhaustion worse.How your WHY can help you identify what matters most during this season of your life.How to choose what stays, what goes, and what you may need from your partner to make that choice work.Habit for Your Happily Ever AfterThis week’s habit for your happily ever after is to find your WHY. If you are feeling too-much-tired and you realize something has to give, take a moment and think about all the things you do in a typical day.Then tell me WHY each of those things matters. When you hear yourself articulate WHY something is important to you, you will hear why some things are more important than others.Dig deeper with your WHY question. Here is an episode I did several years ago that uses this WHY question to discover deeper and deeper layers.Date Night DiscussionIn our discussion today we had a progression:Accept reality: because it won’t all fitUse WHY questions to help you identify what matters most to youFinally, I invite you to choose: what stays? What goes?What will you need to talk with your partner about in order for you to successfully let something go? Do you need to ask for help? Do you need to discuss how your change will impact your family?Want more?Listen to this interview with Monica Packer to hear more about how to value your needsConnect to Improve Your Relationship CommunicationVisit the show notes.Buy my book.Listen to my book.Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers.Follow me on Tik Tok.Follow me on Instagram.Reach me at 970-210-4480

How do you zhuzh up your life if you have no time and no energy?I had the BEST time tasting things recently with my daughter, Kaitlin Pettit, and I want to share the adventure with you, because it’s amazing how little it takes if you know what to be mindful about.Have you ever stopped and asked yourself, “What do you taste?” You will eat completely differently if you do.Noticing is this unbelievably powerful ability you have to change your experience of the world. When you slow down and pay attention not only to what you’re tasting but also to the other sensations that influence the flavor, you elevate your experience.It’s an adventure!My daughter has two little kids—a four year old and a one year old. She is a busy mom. A date night with her husband is…well, let’s just say they don’t go out. So how does she keep a spark of electricity alive in her marriage?She has these “tastings” with her children and her husband. Because this is a season where adventure in the classical sense is harder to find, she has literally spiced up her Friday afternoons by slowing down to really taste the moment unfolding.Want more?Discover how your relationship will change when you notice without judgmentConnect to Improve Your Relationship CommunicationVisit the show notes.Buy my book.Listen to my book.Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers.Follow me on Tik Tok.Follow me on Instagram.Reach me at 970-210-4480Connect with my guestKaitlin Pettit is the CEO of Toilet Equity. Visit their website here.

Do you feel tired even when you’re not doing that much?Last week I introduced you to the distinction between too-much-tired and too-little-tired. Today we’ll talk more about too-little-tired—the exhaustion that comes when you don’t have enough meaning, focus, or purpose in your life. You’ll learn:That when you get clarity on your flavor of exhaustion, you can do a better job with the cure.Why having more time and fewer responsibilities can sometimes leave you feeling even more exhausted.Three things that can help you find your way out of the dark cave of too-little-tired.Date Night DiscussionI’m inviting you to create space in your calendar to have the following discussion. If you don’t feel tired, ask your sweetheart if they feel tired. If neither you nor your sweetheart feels tired, maybe you would be willing to look around your world and find a person who is tired. I remember the people who invited me to join them when I was too-little-tired and felt untethered. A movie night at our local community center. An invitation to take yoga. Those invitations, while difficult to accept, invited me back to myself and helped me emerge from my cave.If, however, you are the one that feels too-little-tired, ask your sweetheart if they would just listen to you for a bit. If you sense that your sweetheart is too-little-tired as well, invite them into the discussion we have today. If you want to use one of my scripts, you'll find them on this blog page. Just scroll down.Check out the whole 4-part series:Part 1: Too-Much-Tired | Listen to the episode | Read it on my blogPart 2: Too-Little-Tired | Listen to the episode | Read it on my blogPart 3: How to Prioritize (available 10/29/26)Part 4: How Pleasure Refills You (available 11/5/26)Want more?Discover why real self care is built on capacity and nourishmentConnect to Improve Your Relationship CommunicationVisit the show notes.Buy my book.Listen to my book.Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers.Follow me on Tik Tok.Follow me on Instagram.Reach me at 970-210-4480

When you view all flavors of tired the same, it’s difficult to address your symptoms. So how do you distinguish too-much-tired from too-little-tired? Today we’re discussing too-much-tired—what happens when life drains your reservoir faster than you can fill it. You’ll learn:How to recognize too-much-tired and distinguish it from the emptiness of too-little-tired.How to identify what’s draining your reservoir—and the downstream consequences of running too low.How to find the “river” that can begin filling your reservoir again.Although we’ll define both types of tired, today’s episode is more heavily focused on too-much tired. Next week we’ll talk more specifically about too-little-tired and in the coming weeks we’ll address ways to cope with both flavors of tired.Date Night DiscussionI’m inviting you to create space in your calendar to have the following discussion. If you don’t feel tired, ask your partner if they feel tired. If neither you nor your partner feels tired, maybe you would be willing to look around your world and find a person who is tired. I invite you to pay it forward. After you’ve identified that tired person, ask them if you can watch their kids while they have this discussion with their partner. Or take over dinner. Or a soft scented soap. Be grateful that you are getting the sleep you need and your reservoir is full.If, however, you are the one that feels tired, ask your partner if they would just listen to you for a bit. If you sense that your partner is tired, ask them the questions included in this episode. You'll find them written down on this page of my blog.Check out the whole 4-part series:Part 1: Too-Much-Tired | Listen to the episode | Read it on my blogPart 2: Too-Little-Tired (available 10/1/26)Part 3: How to Prioritize (available 10/29/26)Part 4: How Pleasure Refills You (available 11/5/26)Want more?Next week, I’ll be back with another episode about too-little-tired. Make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss it!Until then, try listening to this episode about 3 types of rest to relaunch you.Connect to Improve Your Relationship CommunicationVisit the show notes.Buy my book.Listen to my book.Please subscribe to my newsletter here. This unlocks personal invitations from me only available to my subscribers.Follow me on Tik Tok.Follow me on Instagram.Reach me at 970-210-4480