The Positivity Project Podcast

In this episode of "The Positivity Project Podcast," we engage in a thoughtful discussion about the transformative power of gratitude. Gratitude is a concept that can be seen from many different perspectives, ranging from its relationship with quantum physics to its everyday practice in our lives. We begin by highlighting the profound impact gratitude can have on our lives. It's more than just a positive emotion; it's a powerful tool for manifestation. Gratitude practices align with the idea that what you focus on grows. I share insights about gratitude journals, a common tool used to practice gratitude daily. And I emphasise the importance of experiencing gratitude on a deeper level, beyond just writing down a list. Gratitude should evoke a genuine feeling, a sense of appreciation that arises from within, rather than being driven by fear or superstition. It's about understanding that we have things in our lives to be grateful for. I touch upon simple acts of gratitude in everyday life like expressing thanks to others, like a shop attendant, but to remember to feel it as well as say it and this can create a powerful sense of gratitude. We discuss how such acts can create a positive chemical response in our bodies, releasing hormones like endorphins that enhance our well-being. The hosts clarify that while practicing gratitude towards others is valuable, we shouldn't expect everyone to pick up on it or respond in kind. The real power of gratitude lies in the transformation it brings within ourselves. It is a personal journey that allows us to experience abundant and positive emotions, eliminating fear and stress, both emotionally and chemically. We wrap up the episode by highlighting the importance of acknowledging the simple blessings we often take for granted, like clean water, electricity, and running water. We encourage listeners to imagine viewing their lives through the eyes of someone who has never experienced these basic amenities. Such a perspective shift can lead to profound moments of gratitude. In conclusion, the hosts share a beautiful daily gratitude practice: reflecting on breath. It's a fundamental, life-sustaining aspect that often goes unnoticed. By simply being grateful for the breath we take, we can begin each day with a profound sense of appreciation. This episode reinforces the incredible power of gratitude and the importance of practicing it not out of obligation but from a place of true feeling. Gratitude, when cultivated authentically, has the potential to transform our lives and set a positive tone for each day.   To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ Click here to listen on Spotify Click here to listen on Apple Podcast Click here   to listen on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

In this episode of "The Positivity Project Podcast," I delve into the intriguing topic of self-sabotage and explore the nuances of this common human behaviour. I speak about addressing self-sabotage, gaining a deeper understanding of its roots, and discovering practical techniques to overcome it. The discussion begins by demystifying the concept of self-sabotage. Self-sabotage refers to a situation where we find ourselves torn between conflicting desires, as if having one foot on the gas and one on the brakes simultaneously. This internal struggle manifests when we face decisions or actions that stir mixed emotions, where part of us wants to proceed while another part hesitates. One of the vital aspects of the podcast is bringing into our awareness our ability to recognise these inner conflicts when they arise during conversations. These internal contradictions often emerge as phrases like "part of me wants this, but part of me wants that." This revelation serves as a starting point for exploring the roots of self-sabotage. To tackle self-sabotage, it's crucial to recognise that our subconscious mind plays a primary role in protecting us. This innate function of the subconscious mind seeks to safeguard us from harm and adverse experiences. However, when conflicting desires and fears arise, they  can lead to self-sabotage. I  introduce a process to investigate self-sabotage, which involves identifying the primary positive intentions behind these conflicting desires. This process encourages the two opposing aspects of our subconscious mind to communicate and recognize that they both ultimately seek our best well-being. As the discussion unfolds, it's revealed that hope and anticipation can play a significant role in overcoming self-sabotage. Hope acts as a driving force to help us navigate challenges, especially when energy levels are low or when facing self-doubt. I share practical strategies for building hope, such as celebrating small accomplishments and maintaining a sense of purpose. I highlight the importance of releasing fear from past memories that might trigger self-sabotage. By disconnecting emotions from these memories, individuals no longer feel the fear and move forward with confidence. The host emphasises that self-sabotage can be addressed with a process that helps individuals overcome their internal conflicts and achieve their goals. The podcast closes with a reminder that the journey to overcoming self-sabotage is deeply personal, requiring willingness and passion to make lasting changes. This episode offers valuable insights and practical techniques to understand and conquer self-sabotage, empowering listeners to navigate their inner conflicts and thrive in various aspects of life. Self-sabotage doesn't have to hinder your progress, and this episode equips you with the tools to foster hope, release fear, and move forward with purpose and confidence.     To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ Click here to listen on Spotify Click here to listen on Apple Podcast Click here   to listen on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

In this episode of "The Positivity Project Podcast," we tackle the common issue of procrastination and explore how to overcome it. We've all been there, staring at our to-do list, telling ourselves we'll tackle it tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes. I delve into the complexities of procrastination and offer practical insights on how to deal with it. Procrastination is a common challenge for many people, and it often stems from the preference for comfort over the effort required to complete a task. The episode highlights that understanding the nature of procrastination and recognising that it's a choice can empower individuals to overcome it. I stress the importance of having a compelling reason or goal to motivate us to take action. A strong "why" is essential for driving us towards the outcomes we desire. We often procrastinate when we focus on the discomfort of the process rather than the appeal of the goal. Keeping our eyes on the ultimate objective can help us overcome this common trap. The episode also touches on the significance of hope in our lives, particularly when dealing with moments of low energy or difficulty. While some might dismiss the concept of hope, it can be a lifeline for those experiencing challenges. For individuals facing adversity or struggling to take the first step, hope can act as a catalyst for change. Creating a sense of purpose and achieving small wins can foster hope and enable individuals to move forward in challenging situations. The hosts share practical strategies for fostering hope in moments of difficulty. These include celebrating small achievements, setting manageable goals, and maintaining a sense of purpose. The simple act of completing tasks or setting objectives can provide small dopamine hits that contribute to a growing sense of hope and progress. The mantra "This too shall pass" serves as a reminder that challenging situations are temporary and can be overcome with the right mindset and practical strategies. If you've ever found yourself procrastinating or struggling to find hope during tough times, this episode offers valuable insights and strategies to help you regain focus, motivation, and the ability to tackle your to-do list. It emphasizes the power of understanding your "why" and the importance of creating purpose in your daily life. Procrastination doesn't have to hold you back, and hope can be your guiding light during challenging times.   To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ Click here to listen on Spotify Click here to listen on Apple Podcast Click here   to listen on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

In this episode of "The Positivity Project Podcast," we delve deep into the art of making decisions. Making decisions is an essential part of life, but for some, it can be an overwhelming and challenging process. We explore why this is the case and offer a powerful process for making decisions that can lead to better outcomes. The fear of making the wrong decision is a significant reason many individuals find decision-making difficult. It's the anticipation of potential negative consequences that often paralyses us. While it's natural to feel this way, it's crucial to learn how to navigate these concerns. The episode highlights the importance of understanding that decisions, both big and small, are made every moment of every day. These decisions play a pivotal role in shaping our lives, and making good decisions can lead to more positive outcomes. I introduce a comprehensive decision-making process designed to help individuals make better choices when faced with significant life decisions. The process involves creating a timeline, making associations, and projecting oneself into the potential outcomes of each decision. By doing so, one can gain a better understanding of the emotional and physical implications of their choices. This process provides a more comprehensive perspective, enabling individuals to feel the impact of their decisions before they are made. The conversation emphasises that the mind-body connection is significant when making decisions. For instance, we may feel nervousness as butterflies in our stomach when faced with a choice. Recognising these physical reactions and linking them to our emotional state is crucial to understanding how decisions affect us on a deeper level. The process guides individuals to associate themselves into the two potential decisions they are contemplating separately. It encourages them to step into the future, imagining and feel what life would be like under each option, and paying attention to the emotional, physical, and environmental aspects of each outcome. This association helps individuals better connect with their choices, allowing them to experience the feelings associated with each decision which helps guide the best choices. It's important to return to the present moment after exploring each options and thoroughly associating with them. This ensures a balanced perspective while making decisions. Once this process is completed, individuals can weigh the logical pros and cons and make a well-informed decision. It's a powerful and practical technique that has proven successful time and time again. If you've ever struggled with making decisions, or if you're currently facing a significant crossroads in your life, this episode provides valuable insights and a structured process to guide you toward making choices that align with your goals and values. It reminds us that good decision-making is an essential skill that can be developed and refined to improve the quality of our lives.   To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ Click here to listen on Spotify Click here to listen on Apple Podcast Click here   to listen on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

In this episode of "The Positivity Project Podcast," I delve into the intricate topic of people-pleasing and the inherent negativity it often brings into our lives. I explore the roots of this behaviour, its impact on our well-being, and offer insights on how to politely say no when necessary. People-pleasing is a deeply ingrained behaviour, often originating from our childhood experiences during the imprint period, which occurs between the ages of zero and five/seven. During this phase, our subconscious minds are like sponges, absorbing the messages from our parents and caregivers. These messages often emphasise being good, quiet, and putting others first as a measure of our goodness. We unconsciously develop a belief that to be good or to be a nice person, we must always prioritise others. Generosity and kindness are wonderful traits, but when taken to an extreme, they can lead to exhaustion, resentment, and disempowerment. People-pleasers often find themselves in a never-ending cycle of helping others at their own expense, and they may struggle to say no. To break free from this pattern, it's essential to ask whether the behaviour of people-pleasing serves you. If not, it's time to consider alternatives. One effective method is to create a pattern interrupt. When someone asks for your help or assistance, instead of immediately saying yes or no, respond with "Leave that with me; I'll get back to you." This gives you the time to reflect and decide whether the request aligns with your needs and priorities. But what if you decide to decline a request politely? The key is to be honest and communicate your reasons transparently. You might say something like, "I'd love to help you, and I know I have helped you in the past. Unfortunately, this time, [insert your reason here]." It's crucial to offer a valid reason that genuinely reflects your current situation. Importantly, you should also make yourself a priority. Set boundaries and learn to take care of your needs, even if it means saying no to others. If you're feeling overwhelmed or tired, don't hesitate to prioritise self-care. Remember, you can't pour from an empty cup. Incorporating pattern interrupts and setting boundaries are powerful tools for breaking free from the cycle of people-pleasing. They allow you to maintain your well-being while still being kind and generous when it aligns with your own needs and priorities. It's important to recognize that people-pleasing is a deeply ingrained behaviour that takes time to change. However, with self-awareness, practice, and the willingness to put your well-being first, you can transform your pattern of saying yes to everything into a healthier balance that serves both you and those around you. So, the next time you find yourself in a situation where saying no politely is necessary, remember that your well-being matters, and it's okay to prioritize yourself.     To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ Click here to listen on Spotify Click here to listen on Apple Podcast Click here   to listen on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

In this insightful episode of "The Positivity Project Podcast," I explore the fascinating world of problem-solving, sharing techniques and strategies to tackle even the most overwhelming challenges. Do we all have problems? Yes, we do. Problems are a part of life, and they vary in size and complexity from person to person. But the good news is that we all have the ability to find our own solutions. I can't provide a one-size-fits-all solution, but I can certainly guide you through a process that helps you discover the best solution to your unique problem. I introduce a technique that can help you take control of your problems and find effective solutions. The key is understanding how our minds process and perceive problems. When something significant happens, we often create mental images and even run mental movies related to the problem. These mental images can be all-consuming, making it challenging to think clearly. To regain control, I explain the process of dissociation. By mentally pushing the problem away from us, we start to separate ourselves from it, even if only slightly. This initial dissociation helps reduce the emotional stress associated with the problem. It allows us to catch our breath and think more rationally. But I take it a step further. We push the problem out even further, placing it in the distance, on a wall, but keeping it contained within a boundary. The point is not to get rid of the problem but to put it into perspective. The solution to the problem is never within the problem itself. Instead, the answer lies in the "Not Problem" ie - everything outside the boundary of the problem. The solution can often be found by examining how others have dealt with similar issues. Has anyone on Earth, either in the present or the past, ever found a solution to this problem or a similar one? The answer is often yes. This realisation that others have overcome similar challenges can be empowering. Finding solutions may involve research, reaching out to experts, or studying the experiences of those who've faced similar problems. The idea is to understand that the solution is not locked within the confines of the problem but exists outside of it. This process not only helps in problem-solving but also reduces emotional triggers. When we're less emotionally overwhelmed, we're more likely to act in a constructive way and seek positive solutions rather than resorting to unhealthy coping mechanisms. It can be a powerful tool for managing stress and maintaining emotional balance. The episode also touches on the importance of perspective. Problems that seem insurmountable today may not hold the same weight in a year or five years. The reframe of viewing problems in the context of our finite time on Earth can provide valuable perspective and a sense of relief. Ultimately, we all have the potential to navigate our problems and find meaningful solutions. By understanding these techniques and processes, we can empower ourselves to face challenges with clarity and confidence. So, the next time you encounter a problem, remember that the solution is often in the "Not Problem" – just beyond its boundaries.   To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ Click here to listen on Spotify Click here to listen on Apple Podcast Click here   to listen on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

In this episode of "The Positivity Project Podcast," I delve into the common issue of overwhelm that many people face in today's fast-paced, hectic world. I share my insights and strategies for managing overwhelm and provide practical steps to regain control.   Overwhelm is a term I hear frequently, and it often seems like people wear busyness as a badge of honour. It's as if being constantly busy is equated with being productive. This is a notion that I find troublesome, and I've noticed people boasting about how busy they are, which, in my opinion, can lead to a lack of mindfulness and self-care.   Overwhelm is a significant issue in our society, and it often results from having too many thoughts and concerns swirling around in our heads. This mental chaos can make us feel disconnected from our intuition and gut feelings. We end up living solely from the neck up, ignoring our heart and gut instincts. It's essential to recognise that we need a balance between our head, heart, and gut to make sound decisions and live a fulfilled life.   I explain that overwhelm is like living from the neck up, where we constantly think about numerous subjects and categories simultaneously, from work meetings to personal chores and responsibilities. This constant overthinking creates a sense of chaos, making it challenging to focus on any one task.   To address overwhelm, I introduce a simple technique. First, I encourage individuals to acknowledge if they are overwhelmed. This self-awareness is the first step in regaining control. Then, I ask them to externalise their thoughts by picturing all the subjects and concerns lined up outside their heads, like a queue.   Next, I guide them to categorize and prioritize these subjects, just as if they were sorting through papers on a table. This helps to organise their thoughts and reduce stress levels. By understanding which subjects are most urgent, individuals can work on them one at a time without feeling overwhelmed by the enormity of all their concerns.   I emphasise that it's crucial to keep a manageable number of subjects in focus. Trying to tackle too many issues at once can contribute to the sense of overwhelm. Once priorities are set, individuals can start addressing each subject sequentially. This technique not only helps with managing overwhelm but is also effective for people struggling with sleep issues. Writing down concerns and resolutions before bedtime can help ease the mind and lead to a more restful night.   During the conversation, Bibi shares her own method for addressing concerns, which is similar to the technique I've described, reinforcing the importance of externalising and organising one's thoughts.   In conclusion, this episode offers practical solutions for managing and reducing overwhelm by externalising, categorising, and prioritising concerns. By following these strategies, individuals can regain control of their lives and reduce stress, leading to a healthier and more balanced lifestyle. To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ Click here to listen on Spotify Click here to listen on Apple Podcast Click here   to listen on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

Moira helps people overcome negative emotions and belief systems, empowering them to make choices that lead to a more positive and aligned life. Her journey part of which she shares on this episode highlights the importance of self-awareness, perspective, and personal growth. In this episode of "The Positivity Project Podcast," Moira takes you on a personal journey through her experiences and insights in the world of realignment and positivity.   She begins by introducing the term "Recombobulate" and explains its significance. It's all about bringing people back into alignment when they're feeling discombobulated in various aspects of life, such as self-esteem, their perspective on life, and stress management.   Her journey into this work began unexpectedly when, despite being a positive person, she found herself grappling with severe anxiety and depression around 15-20 years ago. She decided to explore traditional treatments like antidepressants and counseling, but they didn't get the desired results for her. That's when she realized that her issues were rooted in her emotional responses to past academic failures, which led to feelings of shame and fear.   The prevailing emotion associated with these memories was shame, which is a common reaction to perceived failures. Moira shares the insight that our subconscious mind stores emotions related to memories and tends to bring up negative ones as a protective mechanism, even when they're no longer relevant.   To overcome this, Moira embarked on a personal analysis journey to better understand her emotions and beliefs. She emphasises the importance of educating people on how to view their issues from a different perspective and work on their belief systems and values. Ultimately, she encourages individuals to choose whether they want to let go of the negative emotions associated with past events.   Moira discusses the role of strength in success and emphasises that even strong individuals can face discombobulation and may need realignment. She points out that everyone can benefit from her work because no one is immune to life's challenges.   She explains that her techniques help individuals release negative emotions and beliefs, allowing them to make choices that serve them better. It's crucial to consider whether a belief system is serving you, and if not, decide whether to let it go or change it.     To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Facebook Group for live chats with me:   https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ  Click here to listen on Spotify Click here to listen on Apple Podcast Click here to listen on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com   Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected   Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary   

On this episode I cover fear and how to reduce it around dealing with difficult people.  I use the "Pink Bow Technique" which is a powerful tool that can be used to manage difficult people and their negative energy. I developed this technique utilising visualisation and disassociation to help individuals protect themselves from the negative energy exuded by difficult people, while also remaining emotionally regulated.  When a difficult person approaches, the first step is to imagine putting out your hands to catch and hold the negative energy that they exude. This visualisation serves as a reminder that you have the power to control your own emotions and that you do not have to allow other people's negative energy to affect you or wash over you and consume you.  As the person speaks and offloads their negative energy, it is important to remain detached and observe without becoming emotionally involved. Imagine holding onto that negative energy, but not allowing it to consume you. This allows you to remain emotionally regulated and avoid getting into a state of fear or anxiety.  Once the person has finished speaking, imagine wrapping up their negative energy in nice wrapping paper and putting a big pink bow on it. This visualisation serves as a reminder that you have taken control of the situation and that you are giving back the negative energy to the person, rather than allowing it to consume you.  It is important to remember that the "Pink Bow Technique" is a tool to help manage difficult people and their negative energy, but it does not mean that we have to condone their behaviour. Once emotions have settled down, and if it is appropriate to approach the person, communication in a clear and assertive manner may help the relationship  When communicating, it is important to come from a place of understanding your own feelings and the impact that the person's behaviour had on you. Instead of blaming or accusing, express your feelings and the effect that the behaviour had on you in a calm and non-confrontational way. For example, "When you did that, I felt disrespected, upset, not valued and I am not happy about it’.  By communicating in this way, you are setting boundaries and making it clear that you will not be happy to tolerate negative behaviour. It is important to remember that setting boundaries is not an attack on the person, it is a way to take care of yourself and create a positive environment for everyone involved.  Additionally, it is important to remember that not all difficult people respond to communication, some may continue with their behaviour and in those cases, it may be necessary to seek support from a supervisor, HR or a therapist.    To stay in the circle you can get free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Facebook Group for live chats with me:   https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ  Click here for the episode on Spotify Click here for the episode on Apple Podcast Click here for the episode on Google Podcasts Website: www.moirageary.com   Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected  Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

How to reduce the fear around decision making A big source of fear for many people is fear around making decisions. This can be big life-changing decisions like deciding whether to take a redundancy, change career, leave a relationship etc or it can be small. If we are having problems making a decision we generally feel very uncomfortable around it and the fear can become paralysing. It is not necessarily a good idea to reduce the fear before the decision is made but rather to support the making of the best possible decision.  In this episode I walk you through a tried and tested decision making strategy I created and have used for many years with clients.  First make sure you are imagining you are in a position on a road before making the decision. Notice how you come to a point in the road where it divides into two roads, one veering to the right and one to the left. Notice how you feel in your body in the flux of not having a decision made. Next, step onto the road to the right which is the road where the big decision is and walk as far as making the decision looking out through your eyes, seeing what you would see, hearing what you would hear and feeling what it feels like to be on that point of the road where you have made that decision. Check in with your body to see what it feels like. Then step out one week beyond that point where you are living life after making that decision and notice what that feels like. How are you acting, behaving, interacting and more importantly, how are you feeling emotionally. Step further out to a month, six months, a year, two years, five years and beyond and check in with how you feel.  Next come back to the point on the road before the decision was made and where the ‘Y’ in the road is. Now do exactly the same think taking the road to the left and feel everything in that scenario too. Then come back to the point on the ‘Y’ in the road.   I have always found that I ask people not to make a definite decision yet but to let that settle with them and over the next day or so to engage their logical mind and look at the pros and cons of their decision options. Next I ask them to decide on a definitive time that they will have their decision made for sure within the next week and max two weeks.  I have used this technique with clients for many, many years and have seen the most unlikely and likely decisions made over the years but what I have to say is that all of those decisions were the right ones and served those people very well.     If you would like to get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training click here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Facebook Group for live chats with me here:   https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ  Spotify Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5VUlQIqnCEsaQeEAEAFxIY?si=ade92df597f0439f  Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/dk/podcast/fear-around-decisions-season-1-ep-7/id1660646733?i=1000601132440  Google Podcasts: https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9hcHAua2FqYWJpLmNvbS9wb2RjYXN0cy8yMTQ3NTA1ODA2L2ZlZWQ/episode/S2FqYWJpLTIxNDc4ODQxOTc?sa=X&ved=0CAQQ8qgGahcKEwiQnOLswan9AhUAAAAAHQAAAAAQDg  Website: www.moirageary.com   Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected  Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

How to Reduce Fear in Relation to Our Problems  This week we are chatting about how to manage fear in relation to our problems. The first step is to explain the concept of Association and Disassociation as I use this in the technique I teach you later in the episode.   When it comes to managing our emotions, one powerful tool we have at our disposal is the ability to disassociate or associate into the pictures we hold in our minds.  Disassociation refers to the process of separating ourselves from the images in our heads that are causing us distress. By doing this, we can distance ourselves from the negative emotions associated with those pictures, which in turn can help to diminish the intensity of those feelings. For example, if you have a traumatic memory that continues to cause you anxiety or fear, disassociating from that memory by visualising yourself as a detached observer, rather than as the person experiencing the trauma, can help to reduce the emotional impact of the memory.  On the other hand, association refers to the process of connecting ourselves to the thoughts, images, and memories that make us feel good. By doing this, we can strengthen the positive emotions associated with those pictures, which in turn can help to increase the intensity of those feelings. For example, if you have a happy memory that makes you feel good, associating with that memory by visualizing yourself as the person experiencing the happy event, rather than as a detached observer, can help to amplify the positive feelings associated with the memory.  It is important to note that both disassociation and association are normal and natural processes that occur in the mind. However, when used intentionally and skilfully, they can be powerful tools for managing our emotions and improving our overall well-being.  The "Problem, Not the Person" technique is a technique I developed that uses association and disassociation to help individuals separate their problems from their sense of self.  The technique is based on the idea that when we have a problem, it can be easy to become absorbed in it and start to identify ourselves with it. This can lead to negative thoughts and emotions such as self-doubt, guilt, and shame. The "Problem, Not the Person" technique helps to separate the problem from the person by teaching individuals to disassociate from their problems as this reduces the fear related to the problem. Next the person can see that the size of the problem is smaller than they thought in relation to the vastness of space where their problem doesn’t exist in. When we have achieved this we can search for solutions to the problem in that space outside the problem or ‘the not problem’. Solutions only exist outside the problem and in the history of mankind there have been thousands if not millions of people who have found solutions to your problem. As well as that we have access to so many answers by using the internet so there is a very high chance that we can all find solutions to most if not all of our problems. Knowing this further reduces the fear related to any problems.  To use this technique, individuals are first asked to identify a problem that they are facing. Next, they are asked to think about the problem as if it were a separate entity from themselves and to move it out in front of them.   Once the problem is imagined as separate from the self, the person is then disassociated from looking at the problem from a distance. As they do this, they can start to notice the problem's characteristics, such as its size, shape etc. By disassociating from the problem, they can start to see it as something that can be managed or solved, rather than something that defines who they are.  After disassociating from the problem and the fear is reduced it is easier to then investigate where the solutions exist which is in the not problem. Then we recognise the solution and decide what action we are going to take to solve the problem.  Get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Facebook Group for live chats with me:   https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ  Spotify Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0bRE3u8sn4mSv0J8KqrP7s?si=161416540f404411  Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/dk/podcast/reducing-fear-part-2-season-1-ep-6/id1660646733?i=1000598697873  Google Podcast: https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9hcHAua2FqYWJpLmNvbS9wb2RjYXN0cy8yMTQ3NTA1ODA2L2ZlZWQ/episode/S2FqYWJpLTIxNDc4NjA0NTQ?sa=X&ved=0CAUQkfYCahcKEwjYzqr1wIb9AhUAAAAAHQAAAAAQAQ  Website: www.moirageary.com   Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected  Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

On this episode I am speaking about Fear and this is the first of four episodes relating to many aspects of fear and how to manage it. It is important have a definition of fear before we look at how to manage it and for the purposes of this podcast I am using the dictionary definition which is ‘fear is an unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain, or ham’. Fear is not all bad and it is good to acknowledge the benefits of fear in measured amounts when it is being used by us to warn us of danger whether that danger is physical or emotional.   Fear is trigged in our bodies as a physical feeling and all of us are capable of feeling. It can be very debilitating when it is out of control and the good news is that we can control it.   We experience fear when we are in danger or when there is a perceived threat. How that feeling gets created is when we perceive danger based on what we are seeing either in our environment or in our thoughts and we then have a chemical, hormonal and neurological response namely the Fight, Flight or Freeze response, all of which are uncomfortable but warn us and allow us to prepare physiologically to stay and fight, run or freeze or play dead.   When we understand the mechanism of this we can see how the feeling of fear moves from one cell to another creating a sense of movement of the feeling in a particular direction. When we become aware of this, that's the first step in being able to manage or reduce the intensity of the fear. By intentionally imagining the fear feeling moving in the opposite direction, we are able to confuse the neural pathway which in turn reduces the fear feeling and I walk you through how to do that in the video or recording on this page. It is a good idea to measure the intensity of the feeling first so that you can measure the improvement in the reduction of the intensity of the fear feeling.    Using this technique I have guided thousands of clients to reduce fears which were at an intensity of ten on a scale of one to ten, down to a zero. This is a little hack that you can have in your back pocket in times where you think you are going to feel fearful or anxious eg speaking at a meeting, interview, driving test, giving a presentation etc. I hope you take advantage of it and enjoy.  Get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here: http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Facebook Group for live chats with me:   https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ  Spotify Podcast Apple Podcast Google Podcast Website: www.moirageary.com   Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected  Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

Get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  How to stop Overwhelm  What is Overwhelm? Overwhelm is a feeling of being overwhelmed or overburdened by a situation or task.   You will know you are overwhelmed if you have a feeling of stress, anxiety, and a sense of being unable to cope.  Signs of Overwhelm:  It can feel like you have too much to do and not enough time to do it,   Or that you are not able to cope with demands on you.   Negatives it can Lead to:  Decreased productivity as well as   difficulty making decisions, and   it can have a negative impact on your overall well-being.   What can you do about it?  take a step back and assess the situation, identify what is causing the overwhelm, and   find ways to manage it.  Here are some steps that may help:   #1 Identify the cause of your overwhelm ie is it anxiety, fear, or insecurity? Once you know the root cause, it will be easier to find ways to address it.  #2 Identify how many subjects are in the overwhelm eg is it what might go wrong at work, stress around a loved one, fear of conflict in a friendship? Projects at work/college.  #3 Write each subject on a separate dedicated piece of paper and journal on them. Taking them out of your head and putting them on paper helps you disassociate from them which will immediately help reduce your emotional response to them.   #4 Next take some time to pick the subject that needs immediate attention or action  #5 Next, start taking the needed action on this subject knowing all of the others are documented and will be taken care of in time.  #6 If you need it set aside dedicated "worry time". Allocate a specific time each day to worry and think about what may be stressing you. By setting aside dedicated worry time, you can reduce the amount of time you spend overthinking the rest of the day.  #7 Leave all the subjects on the paper and don’t allow them back in your head  # 8 Talk to someone you trust about your worries and concerns. Sometimes, just talking through your thoughts with someone else can help you find solutions and gain perspective.     If you found this helpful and you are listening on Spotify or any other podcasts platforms please follow the podcast and leave a rating and if you are watching on YouTube don’t forget to subscribe. Also if you liked this and would like access to my free 7 Day Positivity Project the link is in the descriptor.    Get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here http://www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Facebook Group for live chats with me:   https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ  Spotify Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/episode/1a1HfgN4O3ujpwA6dpGROG?si=8c5da74b36ca4f5b  Apple Podcast:  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-stop-overwhelm-season-1-ep-4/id1660646733?i=1000595334490  Google Podcast: https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9hcHAua2FqYWJpLmNvbS9wb2RjYXN0cy8yMTQ3NTA1ODA2L2ZlZWQ/episode/S2FqYWJpLTIxNDc4NTA2MzM?sa=X&ved=0CAUQkfYCahcKEwjogMeQotL8AhUAAAAAHQAAAAAQLA  Website: www.moirageary.com   Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected  Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

The inner critic is a term used to describe the negative and self-critical thoughts that people often have about themselves. These thoughts can be especially destructive when they are harsh, repetitive, and unbalanced, and can lead to low self-esteem, self-doubt, and a lack of confidence. According to positive psychology, the inner critic can be a major obstacle to happiness and well-being. It can lead to negative self-perception, low self-esteem, and a lack of confidence, which can in turn lead to a host of negative outcomes, such as difficulty setting and achieving goals, difficulty forming and maintaining healthy relationships, and difficulty finding meaning and purpose in life. Positive psychology also emphasizes the importance of building strengths and using them to improve well-being. By focusing on and developing our strengths, we can become more confident, resilient, and capable, which can help to reduce the power of the inner critic over time.  Our inner critic can often appear as a result of negative experiences or messages we received during our childhood or adolescence. These experiences and messages can be internalised and can become the basis for the negative beliefs and thoughts that the inner critic uses to judge us.  It is important to recognise when you are experiencing negative inner self-talk and to try to reframe those thoughts in a more realistic and positive way. This can be a challenging process, but it can help you to feel better about yourself and to build greater resilience.   There are also many different strategies and techniques that can be helpful for managing and reducing the inner critic and its impact and here are 7 to get started with:  Awareness. We can’t possibly make effective change if we are not aware that something is present and to what extent it is present. Notice when the inner critic is speaking, how often it speaks.  Pay attention and become aware of what is it actually saying to you?  Acknowledge that the inner critic's thoughts and beliefs are not necessarily true or helpful. They may be based on past experiences or negative beliefs that you have about yourself, but they do not define who you are.  Challenge the inner critic's words by looking at the evidence for and against what it is saying. Is it balanced and realistic, or is it overly negative and distorted? Start reframing the inner critic's thoughts in a more positive and accurate way. Using sentence starters like ‘at least…..’ and ‘yes but…..’ will help you get started. For example it your inner critic is saying ‘look at you, you messed up again’, you can reframe that with ‘at least I gave it a go’, ‘got it started’, ‘won’t do it that way again’ etc, you get the gist.  Know that your inner critic is not the only available voice in your head, you also have your superhero, practice engaging it!  By practicing self-compassion, which I know can sound a bit lofty, you can learn to be more accepting and forgiving of yourself and develop a more positive and supportive inner voice as well as learn to be kinder and more supportive towards ourselves.     There have been many studies done on the inner critic and self-compassion and below are some of the findings:  One study by Gilbert (2009), explored the role of compassion in mental health and well-being. The study found that cultivating compassion can lead to improved mental health and well-being, and that self-compassion, in particular, can be a powerful tool for overcoming the negative influence of the inner critic. Another study by Neff (2003), defines self-compassion as "extending compassion to one's self in instances of perceived inadequacy, failure, or general suffering" (p. 86). The study found that higher levels of well-being and lower levels of negative emotions, such as depression and anxiety were associated with self-compassion  A third study, by Neff (2011), also found higher levels of well-being and lower levels of negative emotions were associated with self-compassion. The study also found that self-compassion was a better predictor of well-being than self-esteem, which could suggest that self-compassion may be a more important factor in well-being than self-esteem.  Don’t forget that everyone has flaws and everyone makes mistakes, none of us are perfect nor will we ever be and by challenging the inner critic on this you can begin to weaken its power and influence over you.  Gilbert, P. (2009). The compassionate mind. London: Constable.  Neff, K. D. (2003). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity, 2(2), 85-101.  Neff, K. D. (2011). Self-compassion, self-esteem, and well-being. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 5(1), 1-12.    How to stay in the circle:  Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ  Spotify Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0UAKpnEkvZgcoVE2wcJA2f?si=c4f5f2ab14ca466b  Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-quieten-your-inner-critic-season-1-ep-3/id1660646733?i=1000592511758   Google Podcast: https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9hcHAua2FqYWJpLmNvbS9wb2RjYXN0cy8yMTQ3NTA1ODA2L2ZlZWQ/episode/S2FqYWJpLTIxNDc4NDQwMzE?sa=X&ved=0CAUQkfYCahcKEwjgreOQ7K78AhUAAAAAHQAAAAAQNQ   Website: www.moirageary.com  Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected  Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoiragearyhttps://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary

Get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  On this podcast we are going to cover  What is self-confidence?  6 Factors that affect it  6 Tips on how to build self-confidence    What is Self-Confidence?  Self-confidence is the belief you have in yourself and your abilities. It is an important quality to have because it can help you feel more capable of dealing with challenges and achieving your goals.   When you have self-confidence, you are more likely to take some risks and try new things, which can lead to positive personal development.    Factors that affect self-confidence  Lots of things can affect self-confidence and I am going to share 6 with you in a moment. First it is important to outline that some people might have developed lower levels of self-confidence because of conditioning or genetic influences or past experiences, while others can have higher levels of self-confidence but can still have it knocked by negative experiences or situations.  Here are 6 things that can knock confidence, but this is not an exhaustive list:  Negative feedback or criticism from others  Failure or setbacks  Lack of support or encouragement from others  Comparison to others  Lack of success in achieving goals  Difficult life experiences or challenges    It is important to remember that self-confidence can be improved and strengthened over time. This can involve working on:  Building a positive attitude,   Setting and working towards achievable goals and  It can also be helpful to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist if you are struggling with low self-confidence.     How to build confidence  Here are six tips for you to practice to help building your confidence:  Set realistic goals and celebrate your accomplishments.   Practice self-care. Taking care of your physical and mental health is essential for building confidence. This means eating a healthy diet, getting regular exercise, and getting enough sleep.   Choose who you spend time with wisely. The people you spend time with can have a big impact on your confidence. Surround yourself with positive, supportive people who believe in you and encourage you to be your best.  Be positive and avoid negative self-talk but for now remember it's important to stay positive and avoid negative self-talk, which can be detrimental to your confidence. Instead focus on the good things in your life and remind yourself of your strengths and things you have achieved.  Take risks and try new things. Building confidence often means stepping out of your comfort zone and trying new things. This can be scary, but it's also a great way to learn and grow and to gain new skills and experiences, which can boost your confidence.   Practice self-compassion. Being kind and compassionate with yourself is an important part of building confidence. When you make a mistake or face a challenge, try to talk to yourself in the same way you would talk to a friend.     To summaries all of that, Self-confidence is the belief you have in yourself and your abilities. Building confidence is a process that takes time and effort. Things you can do to get started, set goals, practicing self-care, surrounding yourself with positive people, and being kind to yourself. Starting with these few tips will get you on the road so you can gradually start to build your confidence and feel more capable and self-assured.    Before I reveal what you will learn in the next episode remember as always   make sure you get your free access to the 7 Day Positivity Project video training if you haven’t already www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Remember we leave ‘no soldier behind’ so please share this with anyone you know needs it and invite them to join the project.  Stay in the circle ie you can find me in lots of places Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, podcast, email round ups, so find your preferred medium and if you want to join me in free live conversations all links below    How to stay in the circle:  Get your free access to The 7 Day Positivity Project video training if you haven’t already www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Facebook Group for live chats with me: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCne8d8FxIjyMBqrorDUXdBQ  Spotify Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4VBKzjnRFwwcmuZ7b1E4nI?si=645ca8f9e3724218 Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/self-confidence-season-1-ep-2/id1660646733?i=1000591531305   Website: www.moirageary.com   Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected  Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary           On our next episode I will be supporting you with your inner critic:   What exactly is your inner critic?  I will share 4 ways to recognise it and  5 ways to manage it 

Get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  The Truth about Positive Thinking which includes Toxic positivity and What is it? Three ways it can be harmful and how to identify it The flip side ie Positive Thinking 4 Major benefits that research is showing us about Positive Thinking and 5 Actions steps to help you achieve those benefits Toxic positivity is the idea of always trying to maintain a positive attitude, even in difficult or negative situations. This can involve downplaying or dismissing negative emotions or experiences, or pressuring others to always think positively.  While it's important to have a positive outlook on life and to try to find the good in difficult situations, toxic positivity can be harmful in several ways.  First, it can invalidate people's feelings and experiences. When someone is struggling with negative emotions or a difficult situation, it's important to allow them to feel and express those emotions. Dismissing or minimizsng their feelings can make them feel unsupported and isolated.  Second, toxic positivity can create an unhealthy pressure to always be positive, which can be emotionally exhausting and unsustainable. It's okay to have negative emotions, and it's important to allow oneself to feel and process them in a healthy way.  Finally, toxic positivity can also prevent people from seeking help or support when they need it. If someone is constantly told to "think positive" or to "just be happy," they may feel like they can't ask for help or support when they're struggling.  In short, while it's important to try to maintain a positive outlook, it's also important to allow ourselves and others to feel and express a full range of emotions and to look for help when needed.    On the Flip Side:  What research shows on positive thinking  There is some research suggesting that positive thinking can have a range of benefits, including   improved physical health ie better immune function and a lower risk of developing certain health conditions, such as heart disease.  Improved mental health, ie lower rates of depression and anxiety and are more resilient when facing stress.  Better decision-making skills and problem solving skills. People who are more positive tend to approach problems with a more open-minded and flexible attitude, which can lead to better solutions. increased life satisfaction.  However, it's important also to note that positive thinking on its own is not a cure-all, and it's not always possible or healthy to try to always maintain a positive outlook. It's important to allow yourself to feel and express a full range of emotions, and to get help when needed.    Four action steps that will support you:  Make a decision ‘is this what you want yes or no’?  Get access to the 7-day Positivity Project (moirageary.com)  Hourly chime to get a yard stick measurement  Journal/ask yourself the following 3 questions   How badly do I want positive change?  If I was to make positive changes what could life be like for me?  If I decide to stick with Moira what area do I want to start with?    Before I reveal what you will learn in the next episode remember as always   Make sure you get your free access to the 7 Positivity Project video training if you haven’t already www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Remember we leave ‘no soldier behind’ so please share this with anyone you think may need it.  Stay in the circle ie you can find me in lots of places Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, podcast, email round ups, so find your preferred medium and if you want to join me in free live conversations links to everything will be around the page somewhere.  On the next episode I will be supporting you with self-confidence:   What it is.  6 Factors that affect it   6 Tips on how to build Self Confidence  Until then, again remember, stay in the circle to be supported and all links and info are below.    How to stay in the circle:  Get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here www.moirageary.com/pos-proj  Facebook Group for live chats with me and other like-minded people: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1002878506405145  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/moirageary_  YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@the-positivity-project  Spotify Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6Mtt9dqieaRbuBsbakMGVm?si=162d5cb0537f4d67  Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-positivity-project-podcast/id1660646733  Website: www.moirageary.com   Email List: https://www.moirageary.com/stay-connected  Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/Iammoirageary Get your free access to the life changing 7 Day Positivity Project video training here www.moirageary.com/pos-proj