I Talk To Myself Sometimes

Sometimes love catches you by surprise after the biggest heartbreak you think you've ever had to endure and it feels like an invitation to validate and affirm all of the ideas of yourself that previous relationship called into question.Inspired by “Have You Ever” by Brandy.

Happiness begins with embracing the fact that you’re HUMAN. After that, the ways you define…and experience it…will be endless!

Are you sure you know the difference between love, like, lust and limerance? It’s time to stop shaming women that crave sex and physical contact by saying they need to date themselves. Telling them deprivation & isolation mislabeled as self-love is the answer, when in fact, self-awareness is the very necessary muscle she’s exercising by acknowledging her needs in the first place. Inspo track: “Loungin’ (Who Do You Love?) by LL Cool J feat. Total. Listen here: https://spotify.link/tMuzj0Xjkyb

Healthy friendships teach you what showing up feels like. So when you encounter someone new, you draw hard lines in what you know is good and what isn’t. It’s time to practice having the kinds of connections you want. Doesn’t always mean it can happen when you want, but you can to start finding freedom in feeling confident enough to do it. This is how all relationships should feel. Friends, who you love like family. This is what safety feels like. Inspired by “What About Your Friends” by TLC. Listen Here: https://open.spotify.com/track/63PIgPkDf3rswlU4ZWCYAM?si=V568W9bUT8CVywDGMH07vQ

How many times in life did the men & women around you find you most attractive…magnetic…and beautiful when you were broken?! I wonder at how someone could find me magnetic…so irresistably attractive during I season I’ve had to numb myself against in self-defense…and then blanche at the idea of me coming out on the other side different. Does that count as beauty in the eye of the beholder too? Episode inspired by Dru Hill’s “Beauty”. Listen here: https://open.spotify.com/track/125dAqUSmX1nOG50fBz9vb?si=bNQK_oD-R7aiNBwF6eYB_g

Sometimes, getting off makes dudes go off…the deep end. As confusing as that’s been for me I know that I’m not alone so if you’ve ever gotten subpar peen and been dragged downward in a post-coital rabbit hole of anger, shaming, blaming, and outright outrage, then this one is for you too. Inspired by all of the “pipe” dreams Intro sang about on “Come Inside”. Listen here: https://open.spotify.com/track/1XX4xX9rrdaomm4RxAJjZW?si=K4treYrwRR2F-a2Q33xhGw

You have to come to an understanding about what it looks and feels like to trust your gut to guide you towards putting yourself first. It’s time to do away with the guilt of being seen as selfish and start leaning into what makes you feel safe and appreciated. Inspired by “In My Bed” by Dru Hill. Listen here: https://open.spotify.com/track/2MflYZf6aZzOxQWX0O7Brc?si=PfWJEgiBSI2sS115IrCC_w

**Trigger Warning** Episode contains description of domestic violence, assault and abuse. I spent so much time being busy looking…I forgot to SEE. Now that I know what I saw I don’t have the luxury to forgive and forget. This episode is for anyone that needs to keep the reality of what can go wrong top of mind in order to live a life that feels right.

You don’t feel like YOU when you’re busy being someone else. You owe it to yourself to really think about all the things that make you uniquely…well, you, and start to apply them in a way that leaves no doubt that you’re THAT girl…around the way in every way. Inspired by “Around The Way Girl” by LL Cool J. Listen here: https://open.spotify.com/track/6jL1SnyXcXiKOmw4M2RnmT?si=3rxEI6-9SjO5ggrpieOb3g

A little compliment goes a looong way. I hate when men say "I don't need to flatter you, you know how good you look." Sir, my ex literally destroyed my self esteem. Please tell me I'm pretty and that my body is nice. I NEED to hear it. Listen to the song that underscores it all, “So Fine” by Mint Condition here: https://open.spotify.com/track/2ZhSrBSchTaDbxCFi1SoiC?si=fpcI4jCmQGGKamBi6eWW0w

Sometimes, it’s not who you know…it’s knowing when to go. Today’s episode is inspired by an ex-friend’s phuckery, foolishness and the fumbling of me. Listen to the song that sparked the convo, “Get Gone” by Ideal here: https://open.spotify.com/track/0CofintZCm8MhxiOMrauiT?si=5_t29NIdRhWCNz-uh2xY9w

Boyz II Men’s “Never Go Away” dropped in 2000, and if you’ve ever been someone’s whole world—or tried to be—you know this song. This tender R&B ballad captured the kind of intensity we thought was devotion: the breathless declarations, the promises of forever, the feeling that love means needing someone so completely you can’t imagine surviving without them. In this episode of *I Talk To Myself Sometimes*, Antoinette Arrington explores how this reflective classic reveals the difference between intensity and sustainability, devotion and dependency, and what it really means when someone’s friends think they’re crazy.Through layered introspection, this episode examines:• How we confused intensity with commitment in our younger relationships• The difference between being captivated by someone and building a life with them• What it means when “never go away” sounds more like pleading than devotionPerfect for fans of classic R&B, Boyz II Men, nostalgic love songs, honest relationship reflections, soulful music analysis, personal growth, and introspective podcasts, this episode shows how revisiting songs from our past can reveal the difference between love that consumes and love that sustains.Listen now and reflect on the complexity of Boyz II Men’s “Never Go Away”.When did you realize the difference between someone wanting you to stay and someone doing the work to make staying feel good? Drop your reflections in the comments—I want to hear your story.

Erykah Badu’s “Next Lifetime” dropped in 1997, and if you’ve ever felt something real and had to walk away because the timing wasn’t right, you know this song. This wistful neo-soul classic captured the emotional maturity it takes to honor connection without acting on it, the clarity that comes from understanding that wanting someone and being available for them aren’t the same thing, and the wisdom of choosing integrity over impulse. In this episode of *I Talk To Myself Sometimes*, Antoinette Arrington explores how this reflective hit reveals what it means when right person, wrong time isn’t just an excuse, the gift of recognizing that not every connection is meant to be pursued, and the evolved understanding that sometimes love is about respecting what you can’t have.Through layered introspection, this episode examines:• Why right person, wrong time is a truth, not an excuse• The emotional maturity required to honor boundaries in love• How some connections teach us what we’re capable of feeling without being meant to stayPerfect for fans of classic 90s neo-soul, honest reflections on timing and circumstance, soulful music analysis, personal growth, and introspective podcasts, this episode shows how revisiting songs from our past can help us understand the wisdom in walking away from what feels right but isn’t meant to be.Listen now and reflect on the bittersweet clarity of Erykah Badu’s “Next Lifetime”.

Jodeci’s “Forever My Lady” dropped in 1991, and if you’ve ever mistaken intensity for permanence, you know this song. This intimate 90s R&B classic captured the kind of desire that feels all-consuming—the pull toward someone so strong it seems like it has to mean forever. In this episode of *I Talk To Myself Sometimes*, Antoinette Arrington explores how this sensual hit reveals the difference between wanting someone and keeping them, the lessons we carry about confusing heat with devotion, and the self-awareness that comes from understanding that intensity doesn’t guarantee staying power.Through layered introspection, this episode examines:• The difference between desire and devotion• How we confuse intensity with permanence• The hard-won lesson that wanting someone doesn’t make them yoursPerfect for fans of classic 90s R&B, honest reflections on desire and relationships, soulful music analysis, personal growth, and introspective podcasts, this episode shows how revisiting songs from our past can help us name the truths we’ve been carrying.Listen now and reflect on the intimate honesty of Jodeci’s “Forever My Lady”.

Intro’s “Come Inside” dropped in 1993, and if you’ve ever confused intensity with intimacy, you know this song. This intimate 90s R&B classic captured the kind of desire that feels all-consuming… the electric pull of teenage lust versus the complex reality of adult arousal that asks whether good sex equals emotional investment. In this episode of *I Talk To Myself Sometimes*, Antoinette Arrington explores how this sensual hit reveals what happens when we expect sex to communicate care, the confession of confusing someone wanting your body with them wanting you, and the evolved understanding that desire alone can’t carry the weight of real connection.Through layered introspection, this episode examines:• The difference between intensity and emotional investment• Whether it’s wise to expect sex to prove someone’s care• How we confuse arousal with validation and connectionPerfect for fans of classic 90s R&B, honest reflections on desire and intimacy, soulful music analysis, personal growth, and introspective podcasts, this episode shows how revisiting songs from our past can help us untangle intensity from true intimacy.Listen now and reflect on the raw honesty of Intro’s “Come Inside”.

Ideal’s “Get Gone” dropped in 1999, and if you’ve ever reached the point where enough was finally enough, you know this song. This bold 90s R&B hit captured the kind of clarity it takes to walk away without apology—the moment when self-preservation becomes non-negotiable. In this episode of *I Talk To Myself Sometimes*, Antoinette Arrington explores how this liberating classic reveals the power of boundaries, the self-awareness required to stop tolerating what hurts us, and the strength that comes from choosing yourself—even when that choice looks like divorce, separation, or leaving what no longer serves you.Through layered introspection, this episode examines:• The clarity that comes from knowing when to walk away• How boundaries are self-preservation, not punishment• The power of saying enough and actually meaning itPerfect for fans of classic 90s R&B, honest reflections on self-empowerment, soulful music analysis, personal growth, and introspective podcasts, this episode shows how revisiting songs from our past can help us name the strength we’ve been carrying.Listen now and reflect on the unapologetic clarity of Ideal’s “Get Gone”.When did you finally say enough and mean it? Drop your reflections in the comments—I want to hear your story.

TLC’s “Red Light Special” dropped in 1995, and if you’ve ever been drawn to someone who wasn’t meant to stay, you know this song. This sensual 90s R&B classic captured the kind of chemistry that feels magnetic—the pull toward someone that’s undeniable, even when everything else isn’t quite right. In this episode of *I Talk To Myself Sometimes*, Antoinette Arrington explores how this intimate hit reveals the difference between attraction and compatibility, the self-awareness it takes to remember someone fondly without regret, and the gift of holding space for what was good without needing it to have been forever.Through layered introspection, this episode examines:• The difference between chemistry and compatibility• How we can remember someone fondly without longing for them• The maturity of honoring what felt good without needing it to have lastedPerfect for fans of classic 90s R&B, honest reflections on desire and connection, soulful music analysis, personal growth, and introspective podcasts, this episode shows how revisiting songs from our past can help us name the truths we’ve been carrying about attraction, intimacy, and letting go.Listen now and reflect on the intimate honesty of TLC’s “Red Light Special”.Who’s the person you remember for how they made you feel, even though it wasn’t meant to last? Drop your reflections in the comments—I want to hear your story.

Deborah Cox and R.L.‘s “We Can’t Be Friends” dropped in 1998, and if you’ve ever had to let someone go—not out of anger, but out of honesty—you know this song. This unflinching 90s R&B duet captures the kind of emotional clarity it takes to admit that some connections can’t exist in the gray area of friendship. In this episode of *I Talk To Myself Sometimes*, Antoinette Arrington explores how this confessional classic reveals the courage it takes to walk away from someone you still care about, the boundaries we set to protect ourselves, and the hard-won wisdom that comes from recognizing when love doesn’t get a second act.Through layered introspection, this episode examines:• The emotional restraint required to let someone go with grace• Why some relationships can’t be downgraded to friendship• The maturity it takes to say “I can’t do this halfway”Perfect for fans of classic 90s R&B, honest reflections on relationships, soulful music analysis, personal growth, and introspective podcasts, this episode shows how revisiting songs from our past can help us name the truths we’ve been carrying.Listen now and reflect on the emotional honesty of Deborah Cox and R.L.‘s “We Can’t Be Friends”.Have you ever had to walk away from someone, not because you stopped caring, but because staying wasn’t honest? Drop your reflections in the comments—I want to hear your story.

Monica’s “Why I Love You So Much” dropped in 1995, and if you were there, you remember. This tender 90s R&B ballad captured the kind of devotion that felt absolute—unguarded, all-encompassing, innocent. In this episode of *I Talk To Myself Sometimes*, Antoinette Arrington explores how this nostalgic classic reveals the beauty and vulnerability of loving someone before you fully know yourself, the lessons we carry from our first experiences of devotion, and the wisdom that comes from looking back on who we were when we first pressed play.Through layered introspection, this episode examines:- The innocence of all-in, uncomplicated teenage love- How early devotion shapes our understanding of connection- The bittersweet gift of remembering who we were before love got complicatedPerfect for fans of classic 90s R&B, nostalgic reflections, soulful music analysis, personal growth, and introspective podcasts, this episode shows how revisiting songs from our past can reveal the wisdom hidden in our most tender memories.Listen now and reflect on the timeless lessons of Monica’s “Why I Love You So Much”.What did this song teach you about love? Drop your reflections in the comments—I want to hear your version of this story.

In this episode of I Talk To Myself Sometimes, we revisit Dru Hill’s debut single “Tell Me” (1996) — a soulful plea that blurs the line between desire and vulnerability. Through a modern lens, this episode unpacks how 90s R&B men often used sensuality as their safest language for expressing emotional need.