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Welcome to More Than Roommates, where we want to help you take the next step to be more intentional in your marriage. We want to help you avoid falling into the trap of being merely roommates with your spouse. We hope that through authentic, biblical, and practical conversation you will gain tools and wisdom to help you take one step closer to the Lord and the marriage He intends for you and your spouse. Listen in as Scott Kedersha, Gabrielle McCullough, and Derek Davidson help you intentionally strengthen your relationship.
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Like it or not, our struggles affect our marriages more than we realize. In this episode of More Than Roommates, Gabrielle and Scott talk with Ann Daly about struggles, recovery, and your marriage. Because of Jesus, life change is possible for everyone and for every marriage.Scriptures:James 5:16Proverbs 28:13Genesis 2:24Galatians 1:10Romans 5:3-51 Peter 4:19Galatians 6:9Hebrews 3:13Resources:Regeneration recovery – change is possible!Regeneration Struggle Finder – What are you struggling with?Celebrate RecoveryQuestions to Discuss:1. Do you tend to identify yourself by your sin or by your relationship with Jesus Christ?2. How do your issues/challenges affect your marriage?3. What lies do you tend to believe? Who does God say you are? (Replace the lies with Truth).
In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss things we do that may seem weird to the world but allow us to be different in our marriages than the struggling marriages we all see around us. These are decisions we’ve each made that may seem unique but allow us to strengthen our marriages.Scriptures:Romans 12:21 Peter 2:11Philippians 3:20-212 Timothy 2:4Resources:Podcast & Blog Post - 5 Weird Decisions that Make My Marriage AwesomeQuestions to Discuss:1. What are the things you do in your marriage that make you different than the marriages of the world? (Romans 12:2)2. Where do you see your marriage blending in with the marriages of the world/non-Christian marriages?3. Would your non-Christian friends look at your marriage and see something unique or different?
Do you and your spouse have inside jokes, traditions, or rituals that make your marriage unique and build a culture of exclusivity in your marriage? In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss the importance of building a strong culture in your marriage that makes it different than any other marriage on the planet.Scriptures:Genesis 2:24-25Revelation 2:4Proverbs 5:18Resources:Blog Post - How Inside Jokes And Rituals Can Strengthen Your MarriageDiscussion Questions:1. What are some of your inside jokes or rituals in your marriage?2. How can you build the culture of your marriage? What are the things that are like glue that bond your marriage together?
Everyone of us struggles with temptation—even Jesus faced temptations! What are the temptations we need to avoid that can wreck our marriage? And how is marriage uniquely designed so that we can help each other flee from temptations?Scriptures:Proverbs 5Proverbs 18:8Proverbs 13:201 Peter 1:16Questions to Discuss:1. What does it look like for you to flee from temptation?2. What temptations do you face? How can your spouse help you?3. How can you move the line, magnify the consequences, and map out your escape?4. What would be helpful for you to confess to your spouse and to your community to help you with your temptations?Resources:Book - Think Ahead: 7 Decisions You Can Make Today for the God-Honoring Life You Want Tomorrow, by Craig Groeschel
On this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek and Scott have an authentic and honest conversation with Aaron Smith from the ministry Marriage After God. We discuss pornography, intimacy issues, and the challenges many couples face. Aaron and his wife Jennifer hope to inspire individuals to draw closer to God and their spouse as they chase boldly after God’s purpose for their life together.Scriptures:Hebrews 4:151 Thessalonians 5:16-18Questions to Discuss:1. How are you and your spouse doing at consistently praying together?2. What’s one step you and your spouse can take to pray together on a more consistent basis?Resources:Aaron & Jennifer Smith’s Website – Marriage After GodThe Smiths new book – The Marriage Gift: 365 Prayers for Our MarriageAaron and Jennifer Smith’s Marriage Podcast – Marriage After God
In our culture, it’s extremely common for married people to have celebrity crushes—studies say 80% of married men and women have celebrity crushes. Does that make it okay for you or your spouse to have a celebrity crush? Should you have crushes on anyone besides your spouse?Scriptures:Proverbs 5:18-19Romans 12:1-2, 13:14Ephesians 5:31 Corinthians 6:18Questions to Discuss:Who’s the most famous person you’ve ever met? Why do you think we obsess about celebrities?Why do you think people believe it’s acceptable to have a celebrity crush but not okay to have a crush on non-celebrities?Tell your spouse what you love about them and then go crush on them!
We have an enemy who likes to feed us lies about marriage, temptation, and God’s design for relationships. The enemy actively tries to destroy our marriages, but as followers of Christ, the One we serve and follow is greater! We hope you’re encouraged by this new episode of More Than Roommates. Scriptures:1 Peter 5:8John 10:101 Corinthians 13:5Romans 5:8 Resources:Book – The Screwtape Letters, by C.S. Lewis Questions to Discuss:1. Did you and your spouse write letters to each other during dating and engagement?2. What are some of the lies you believe about yourself and about marriage?3. What are some things that your spouse does ‘right’—focus on keeping track of what they do right and not wrong/annoying.4. What are the times when you tend to be the most susceptible to believing lies or engaging in conflict with your spouse?
While this may not be the story for most of our marriages, polyamorous relationships (multiple romantic relationships with the consent of all involved) are gaining traction in culture. What do you need to know about polyamory and how can you protect your marriage? Scriptures:Isaiah 4:11 Peter 5:8John 10:10 Resources:Podcast – The Briefing with Albert Mohler – February 15, 2024Book – Get Married, by Brad WilcoxArticle – “Couple to Throuple” Normalizes Polyamory, by Jim Denison Questions to Discuss:1. What are some ways you can “water your own garden” and pour into your own marriage?2. Take a few moments to pray that God would protect your marriage from any polyamorous desires and pray the same for the marriages of your close friends and family.3. Think about what you engage with in books, TV, and movies. How can these resources potentially fuel your desires in a harmful way? Discuss with your spouse.
In this episode of More Than Roommates, we interview Counselor and Author Christa Hardin about her book and work with the enneagram. The enneagram is a helpful resource to help you learn more about yourself, your spouse, and your interactions in marriage and today we discuss how it can help you strengthen your marriage.Scripture:1 Peter 3:7Resources:Christa’s Book – Enneagram in Marriage, by Christa HardinChrista’s Podcast – The Enneagram and Marriage PodcastChrista’s Website – Enneagram and Marriage and Follow Christa on InstagramQuestions to Discuss:What is your enneagram number? Your spouse’s?How is the enneagram a helpful tool to help you understand yourself and your spouse in a deeper way?What’s one practical way you can serve and encourage your spouse today in their unique wiring?
In Part 2 of this series on being a learner in marriage, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss different ways we can all learn in marriage and what we're each learning in our own marriages currently. Scripture:1 Peter 3:7James 1:22-25Resources:Blog Post - Do You And Your Spouse Have Teachable And Humble Hearts In Marriage?Book – The 5 Love Languages, by Gary ChapmanQuestions to Discuss:1. How do you learn? What kind of learner are you?2. What is something you are learning in marriage right now?3. What’s one way, today, you can choose to intentionally learn more about your spouse?
In this episode of More Than Roommates, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss what they did and didn’t learn in premarital counseling. Whether engaged or married for decades, we hope today’s new episode encourages and challenges you in your marriage.Scriptures:Proverbs 18:2James 1:191 Corinthians 7:28Resources:Book – Tim Keller, The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of GodBook – Scott Kedersha, Ready or Knot? 12 Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have before MarriagePodcast – Episode 35 – How to Identify the Four Negative Horsemen of Communication and ConflictPodcast – Episode 12 – How to Identify Negative Communication PatternsQuestions to Discuss:When’s the last time you were really unprepared for something?What are you glad you learned in premarital counseling?What do you wish you had learned in premarital counseling?
Multiple studies and articles show that the average couple talks to each other for only twenty minutes per week. In this episode, Derek, Gabrielle, and Scott discuss practical ways to make time in your marriage to connect and communicate with each other. All healthy couples might intentionally fight for time together.Scriptures:Colossians 3:12-14Matthew 18:15-17Ephesians 4:29Resources:Blog Post - Do you talk more than the average couple?Questions to Discuss:1. Are you an internal or external processor? How about your spouse?2. What are some ways you and your spouse can increase the amount of time you communicate with each other every week?3. What consumes your thoughts right now? Discuss with your spouse.
In this episode of More Than Roommates, Scott interviews his friend Justin Davis. With candor and transparency, Justin shares he and his wife’s powerful marriage testimony and we discuss the value of authenticity in helping couples be so much more than just roommates.Scriptures:Proverbs 28:13Genesis 2:25Questions to Discuss:Justin defined intimacy as being fully known emotionally, spiritually, and physically. How are you doing in marital intimacy?Who’s more authentic in your marriage—you or your spouse? How can you grow in authenticity?Resources:Justin’s New Book – Being Real > Being Perfect: How Transparency Leads to TransformationJustin & Trisha Davis’ Ministry – RefineUs MinistriesJustin & Trisha’s Marriage Story – Beyond Ordinary: When a Good Marriage Just Isn’t Good EnoughJustin & Trisha’s Podcast – Let’s Get Real with Justin and Trisha Davis
One of the best ways you can grow your marriage is to set aside time every week to ask each other some intentional, specific questions. In this episode of More Than Roommates we discuss the weekly meeting and some questions you can ask each other every week.Scriptures:Genesis 2:252 Corinthians 12:9Ephesians 5:15-16Questions to Discuss:What is God teaching you? How can I serve you better this upcoming week?How can I pray for you in the week ahead?How can we make sure we make time for each other?What's on our calendar in the next week? Resources:Blog Post - One Thing We Like To Do For Our Marriage Every Week
Today in part 9 of our 9-part series on the Fruit of the Spirit and your marriage, we discuss self-control. Like a city whose walls are broken down, a marriage marked by a lack of self-control is often broken and in need of restoration. In this episode of More Than Roommates, we discuss why it matters to demonstrate the fruit of self-control in your marriage.Galatians 5:22-23Proverbs 25:28Questions to Discuss:1. Who is more disciplined in your marriage—you or your spouse?2, Where do you show self-control in marriage and where can you grow?3. As we wrap-up this 9-part series, which of the 9 Fruit of the Spirit mark your life and marriage? Where is it lacking?
Today in part 8 of our 9-part series on the Fruit of the Spirit and your marriage, we discuss gentleness. In our relationships, we either escalate/exacerbate the challenges with anger or a lack of gentleness, or we demonstrate the fruit of spirit of gentleness and turn away wrath.Galatians 5:22-23Proverbs 15:1Matthew 11:28-30Gentle and Lowly, by Dane OrtlundQuestions to Discuss:1. What’s a household task you’re not good at?2. Would your spouse/others describe you as gentle/tender?3. How does a lack of gentleness affect your relationships with your spouse/kids/others?
Today in part 7 of our 9-part series on the Fruit of the Spirit and your marriage, we discuss faithfulness. We all want to be faithful in every aspect of our lives and reflect God’s faithfulness. This plays out in many different ways in our marriages!Galatians 5:22-232 Timothy 2:13Luke 16:10Questions to Discuss:1. Are there any teams/brands/artists that you are way too loyal to (i.e., they can do no wrong)?2. Would you and your spouse say your marriage is marked by fidelity? Do you keep your promises and do what you say you’re going to do?3. Trust is built in drops and lost in buckets. How can you build trust through your faithfulness?
Today in part 6 of our 9-part series on the Fruit of the Spirit and your marriage, we discuss ‘goodness’. What if our marriages were marked by integrity and goodness? We know God is good, and so how can we look more like Jesus in our marriage?Galatians 5:22-23Romans 3:10-12Psalm 14:3Psalm 31:19Acts 5:1-11Questions to Discuss:1. When did you most get in trouble for school (for cheating, or for other reasons)?2. What are some ways you can grow in your integrity in your marriage? Discuss with each other.3. Are there small areas in your life and marriage where you allow space for compromise? Ask your spouse if they see any areas of compromise in your life and marriage?
Today in part 5 of our 9-part series on the Fruit of the Spirit and your marriage, we discuss the importance of kindness. What if our marriages were marked by kindness? How different would we look than the rest of the world if husbands and wives were kind to one another?Galatians 5:22-23 Romans 2:4Ephesians 4:32Psalm 145:171 Corinthians 13:4Questions to Discuss:1. What were some TV shows you watched as a kid?2. Who’s the kindest person you know? What does this person do that makes them kind?3. What’s one tangible way you can show kindness to your spouse today?
In part 4 of our 9-part mini-series on the Fruit of the Spirit we’re talking about patience! In our instant society, patience can be really challenging. But when we’re led by the Spirit, we can demonstrate a Christlike patience in our marriages. Galatians 5:22-232 Peter 3:9 Questions to Discuss:1. Is it easier for you to show more patience to other people or towards your spouse?2. How does selfishness contribute to a lack of patience in your marriage and family?3. How does a lack of patience play out in your marriage and family?
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