The Ex-Good Girl Podcast

Save your spot for my upcoming workshop HERE!How to Find Your Outside Voice is a miniseries leading up to my free workshop, Say What You Need to Say. This series is driven by my deep belief that when women learn how to speak up in ways that feel safe and doable, it can change everything. In this episode, we’re talking about the life of freedom, confidence, and empowerment that is waiting for you on the other side of developing this skill.Register for Say What You Need to Say, a free one-hour workshop for women who are ready to finally ask for what they want and need in their relationships.You have three options to join me LIVE: Thursday, April 9th at 5:00pm PT | Monday, April 13th at 12pm PT | Friday, April 17th at 9am PT You’ll get three steps you can use this week to find your yes or no — and say it out loud.This workshop is free. No catch.Find Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationsinstagram.com/sarafiskcoachfacebook.com/SaraFiskCoachingtiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachyoutube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Save your spot for my upcoming workshop HERE!How to Find Your Outside Voice is a miniseries leading up to my free workshop, Say What You Need to Say. This series is driven by my deep belief that when women learn how to speak up in ways that feel safe and doable, it can change everything. In this episode, we’re unpacking the two biggest things that will try and stop you from saying what you need to say.Register for Say What You Need to Say, a free one-hour workshop for women who are ready to finally ask for what they want and need in their relationships.You have three options to join me LIVE: Thursday, April 9th at 5:00pm PT | Monday, April 13th at 12pm PT | Friday, April 17th at 9am PT You’ll get three steps you can use this week to find your yes or no — and say it out loud.This workshop is free. No catch.Find Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationsinstagram.com/sarafiskcoachfacebook.com/SaraFiskCoachingtiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachyoutube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Save your spot for my upcoming workshop HERE!How to Find Your Outside Voice is a miniseries leading up to my free workshop, Say What You Need to Say. This series is driven by my deep belief that when women learn how to speak up in ways that feel safe and doable, it can change everything. In this episode, we’re talking about the thing that really keeps people stuck: waiting to say it perfectly.Register for Say What You Need to Say, a free one-hour workshop for women who are ready to finally ask for what they want and need in their relationships.You have three options to join me LIVE: Thursday, April 9th at 5:00pm PT | Monday, April 13th at 12pm PT | Friday, April 17th at 9am PT You’ll get three steps you can use this week to find your yes or no — and say it out loud.This workshop is free. No catch.Find Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationsinstagram.com/sarafiskcoachfacebook.com/SaraFiskCoachingtiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachyoutube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Save your spot for my upcoming workshop HERE!How to Find Your Outside Voice is a miniseries leading up to my free workshop, Say What You Need to Say. This series is driven by my deep belief that when women learn how to speak up in ways that feel safe and doable, it can change everything. In this episode, we’re exploring how every conversation you’ve been dreading is really just a "yes" or a "no" that you haven’t said yet.Register for Say What You Need to Say, a free one-hour workshop for women who are ready to finally ask for what they want and need in their relationships.You have three options to join me LIVE: Thursday, April 9th at 5:00pm PT | Monday, April 13th at 12pm PT | Friday, April 17th at 9am PT You’ll get three steps you can use this week to find your yes or no — and say it out loud.This workshop is free. No catch.Find Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationsinstagram.com/sarafiskcoachfacebook.com/SaraFiskCoachingtiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachyoutube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Save your spot for my upcoming workshop HERE!How to Find Your Outside Voice is a miniseries leading up to my free workshop, Say What You Need to Say. This series is driven by my deep belief that when women learn how to speak up in ways that feel safe and doable, it can change everything. In this episode, we’re talking about the hidden tax of not speaking up and how it drains your time, energy, and connection until you start asking yourself what you actually want.Register for Say What You Need to Say, a free one-hour workshop for women who are ready to finally ask for what they want and need in their relationships.You have three options to join me LIVE: Thursday, April 9th at 5:00pm PT | Monday, April 13th at 12pm PT | Friday, April 17th at 9am PT You’ll get three steps you can use this week to find your yes or no — and say it out loud.This workshop is free. No catch.Find Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationsinstagram.com/sarafiskcoachfacebook.com/SaraFiskCoachingtiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachyoutube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Save your spot for my upcoming workshop HERE!How to Find Your Outside Voice is a miniseries leading up to my free workshop, Say What You Need to Say. This series is driven by my deep belief that when women learn how to speak up in ways that feel safe and doable, it can change everything. In this episode, we start with a powerful truth: if you’re struggling to speak up, you make sense.Register for Say What You Need to Say, a free one-hour workshop for women who are ready to finally ask for what they want and need in their relationships.You have three options to join me LIVE: Thursday, April 9th at 5:00pm PT | Monday, April 13th at 12pm PT | Friday, April 17th at 9am PT You’ll get three steps you can use this week to find your yes or no—and say it out loud.This workshop is free. No catch.Find Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationsinstagram.com/sarafiskcoachfacebook.com/SaraFiskCoachingtiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachyoutube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

Today, I get to talk with someone whose story has stayed with me for years. Shirlee Draper grew up in a polygamist community that became more controlling and unsafe as time went on. With no money, no work history, and no support outside her community, she made the difficult decision to leave everything behind and start over. We discuss the tension between staying and knowing something isn’t right, and what it takes to start trusting yourself again. This conversation is not just about Shirlee’s journey—it’s about what can happen when women find their voice and their autonomy. Here’s what we cover:How Shirlee spent years saving money and quietly planning before she could leaveWhat it means to choose the “least harmful option” when every choice feels like a betrayalWhy we can’t understand other people’s choices without their experiences and contextWhy decision-making is something you have to learn after being told what to do your whole lifeWhat it looks like to help women build their own inner voice instead of replacing it with another authorityShirlee Draper was born and raised in “Short Creek.” After leaving the community, she obtained a Bachelor of Social Work and a Master of Public Administration. She has served in many capacities in the rebirth of her hometown, including facilitating the election of the first female mayor in 2017; opening a community health clinic in 2019; serving on the board of the UEP Trust and Short Creek Community Center; and part of the Collective Impact project aimed at community revitalization.She is employed as Deputy Director for Cherish Families, a social service nonprofit which helps people from polygamous backgrounds move from crisis to thriving. She specializes in bridging the population with mainstream society and provides education for outside service providers and government agencies She also serves on several state and civic committees. Shirlee lives in St. George with her special needs children and loves to play the piano, read and travel.Find Shirlee here:cherishfamilies.org instagram.com/shirlee_jd facebook.com/shirlee.draperlinkedin.com/in/shirlee-draper lostandfound.club/events Support Cherish Families' workFind Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationsinstagram.com/sarafiskcoachfacebook.com/SaraFiskCoachingtiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachyoutube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

I’m bringing back an episode that explores something I care about deeply: the healing that happens when women gather in community. We live in a culture that conditions women to believe something is wrong with them—that we’re too emotional, our thoughts don't make sense, and we can’t trust ourselves. But when women share their real experiences with each other, that belief begins to unravel. In this re-release, I discuss the communities I’ve been part of that have shaped my life and why support from other women can drive powerful change. Here’s what I cover:How patriarchal conditioning teaches women to believe they constantly need fixingWhy witnessing other women’s stories helps us see that we are not “extra special super broken”How being witnessed by other women can completely change the way we see ourselvesTwo common obstacles that keep women from seeking community and how to move through themWhy learning with and from other women creates powerful momentum for growth and changeFind Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationswww.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachwww.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

To what degree do you feel capable of saying what you want to say in your life and in your relationships? In this episode, I’m revisiting one of my favorite episodes about the powerful combination of choice and voice. A revolution happens when women say what they want to say. When you can express how you really feel, it becomes easier to stand up for yourself and set expectations. Your relationships shift, your choices become clearer, and you stop performing and start actually living. Here’s what I cover:One of the key skills I teach my clients: how to articulate themselves during difficult conversationsHow reconnecting to your own wants and needs is a process that takes timeWhy we are capable of updating the relationships in our lives to match our current wants and needsWhy authenticity removes the pressure to perform in order to feel acceptedHow learning to handle the stress of advocating for yourself leads to deeper integrity and lasting comfortFind Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationswww.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachwww.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

This episode is a reminder of how prejudice can soften when we look beyond policies to see real people, and it feels especially important to bring it back now. In this re-release of a past conversation, I’m joined by my dear friend Alex Regan, a trans man, interfaith minister, speaker, author, and transformative spiritual coach. Meeting Alex changed my life because it replaced my experience of an abstract label with a real human being with a nervous system, a story, hopes, and fears just like me. Once you see someone clearly like that, it becomes much harder to ignore how they are being treated. My hope is that hearing Alex’s story will create that same kind of shift for you. Here’s what I cover:How stories reduce prejudice by turning a “group” into a real person you actually care aboutHow good girl conditioning trains us to abandon ourselves and why that wiring shows up everywhereAlex’s journey of unlearning evangelical rules and building trust in his own inner knowingWhat it looks like to stop fighting for approval and let people be wrong about youHow community changes everything when you stop performing and start living as your real selfFind Alex here:www.alexreegan.comwww.instagram.com/revreegs Find Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationswww.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachwww.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

It’s so easy to feel stuck and overwhelmed when we haven’t figured something out yet. But what if you looked for the evidence in your life that you can solve the problem? In this episode, I share how I’m borrowing belief from my past self to help me make a decision I’m wrestling with now. Instead of demanding certainty or shaming myself for not knowing the answer, I’m using real proof from my own history to help me relax while I take the time to figure it out. Here’s what I cover:How leaving the church one step at a time taught me how to untangle my beliefsWhy your brain relaxes when you offer it real evidence from your pastHow to copy and paste a past growth process onto the problem you’re facing todayThe self-judgment that creeps in when you think you should have it figured out by nowA powerful visualization to help you imagine the future version of you who already solved the problemFind Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationswww.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachwww.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

The overwhelming amount of information, emotion, and terror we are experiencing in the world right now can make it hard to know what to do with ourselves. Last week’s episode came from my own experience of feeling like I was going to break and realizing my nervous system was completely overloaded. In this episode, I build on that and talk about what to do—because it’s not enough to say you will “just get off social media” or “stop doom scrolling.” If it were that simple, I would have stopped, and maybe you would have too. We’ll look at why this is so hard to put down and what it takes to step back in a way that allows you to stay informed without losing yourself in the crush of information. Here’s what I cover:Why doom scrolling is not activism and can hinder you from taking thoughtful actionThe good girl rules that make disengaging feel like a moral failingWhy learning to regulate your nervous system can be a powerful form of resistanceWhat happens when your reptile brain takes over and you’re stuck in looping thoughtsPractical ways to regulate so you can stay informed and respond in ways that actually helpFind Sara here:sarafisk.coachpages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationswww.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachwww.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

Over the last few weeks, the constant exposure to human suffering, injustice, and horrifying information has felt like an avalanche. If you’ve been taking this in through social media and the news like I have, you might notice yourself swinging between obsessing and shutting down, or believing that if you look away or take a break, it means you don’t care. In this episode, I share what helped me understand what was actually happening in my nervous system and why feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means your body was never meant to hold all of this. Here’s what I cover:An Instagram post that helped me understand how the overwhelm we’re living through impacts the bodyHow flooding ourselves with horrific information without containment destabilizes our nervous systemsWhy empathy and good girl conditioning can turn caring into self-sacrificeThree things to pay attention to so we can stay connected to the truth without losing ourselvesWhat it looks like to give yourself permission to decide what level of engagement is right for youFind Sara here:https://sarafisk.coachhttps://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationshttps://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachhttps://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

In this episode, I sit down with erotic wholeness guide Darshana Avila to talk about embodiment, authenticity, and coming home to the body. Darshana was featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & Goop, which was one of my early introductions to a broader idea of eroticism as I began to unravel my good girl conditioning. We explore what happens when women don’t know what they want or don’t trust their bodies—a disconnection shaped by the systems we were raised in, not personal failure. Darshana offers a different path forward, rooted in compassion, nervous-system safety, and learning to listen to the body. Here’s what we cover:How Darshana defines erotic wholeness and why it’s not limited to sexWhy “I don’t know what I want” is a common and understandable starting pointWhat compartmentalization looks like in real life and how conditioning keeps it in placeHow authenticity begins with sensing what is and isn’t for youSimple ways to begin reconnecting through your senses and the four allies of erotic embodimentDarshana Avila is a trauma-informed somatic educator, practitioner and international speaker who helps people reconnect with the most essential aspects of themselves — their truth, their desires, and their capacity for profound pleasure and power. Her work has been featured on Netflix’s Sex, Love & Goop, The Guardian, The New Yorker, and numerous leading podcasts.Find Darshana here:darshanaavila.com instagram.com/darshana_avila youtube.com/@darshana-avilalinkedin.com/in/darshana-avilahttps://darshanaavila.com/podcast/ Find Sara here:https://sarafisk.coachhttps://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationshttps://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachhttps://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

For a long time, codependency has been framed as weakness or passivity—that’s why so many strong, capable, high-functioning women hear that word and immediately think, that is absolutely not me. In this episode, I explore where the concept of codependency actually came from and why that original definition often doesn’t fit. When we widen the lens, codependency starts to look a lot more like over-functioning and organizing your time, energy, and identity around other people. When we can understand it in that way, it opens up a much more honest and hopeful path forward. Here’s what I cover:Why the original addiction-based definition of codependency misses how it shows up for high-functioning womenHow control can turn into codependency and start to replace your self-connectionWhat it looks like when your identity is built around being needed or emotionally steadyHow codependency costs you your time, energy, and brain space, whether it feels like over-functioning or under-functioningQuestions to help you notice where you’re managing others in order to feel okayFind Sara here:https://sarafisk.coachhttps://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationshttps://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachhttps://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

Improving your conflict skills isn’t about finding the perfect words—it’s about understanding why conflict feels so hard in the first place. When your body believes that speaking up could cost you connection, of course it freezes, softens, or stays quiet. In this episode, I talk about how our nervous systems learned early on that conflict wasn’t safe, and why that doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. When we slow down and get curious about our conflict response rather than judging it, that’s when real change becomes possible, and you can actually get good at conflict. Here’s what I cover:How shifting from “what’s wrong with me?” to “why does this make sense?” helps eliminate the self-criticism spiralThe early lessons your body learned about conflict, compliance, and staying connectedHow people-pleasing and staying small function as intelligent survival strategiesThe questions I offer to help you look backward and make sense of your conflict responseHow attachment patterns shape what your body expects will happen when conflict threatens connectionRegister for my upcoming workshop HERE!Find Sara here:https://sarafisk.coachhttps://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationshttps://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachhttps://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

We are living through an incredibly intense political, social, and cultural moment, and it’s easy to fall into the despair and overwhelm of it all. In this episode, I’m sharing a framework that helps me make sense of what's happening and hold onto hope. Spiral dynamics explains how humans organize around shared value systems, and what happens when those systems collide and begin to collapse. While these transitions are often destabilizing and painful, what we’re living through is not random–and understanding the pattern offers the reminder that how we choose to show up, care for ourselves, and embody the values we want to see matters. Here’s what I cover:The origin of spiral dynamics and how the framework can show up in everyday lifeWhy systems resist evolution with the same fear and violence they were established withHow the framework of spiral dynamics relates to good girl rules and people-pleasing tendenciesWhy nervous system safety and connection matter alongside protest, organizing, and action during times of changeHow rest, pleasure, joy, and community are not distractions, but essential tools for surviving times of massive transitionFind Sara here:https://sarafisk.coachhttps://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationshttps://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachhttps://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

Is your social media feed overflowing with New Year’s resolutions and tips to optimize your life? This mindset can feel overwhelming, so instead of pushing for the “perfect” 2026, I’m offering something else in this episode: five questions I return to again and again to recalibrate my relationship with myself. These questions aren’t about productivity or self-improvement. They’re an invitation to unlearn good girl conditioning, step out of self-abandonment, and choose a way of living that actually feels like yours. Here’s what I cover:How women’s socialization continues to shape our choices and behaviorsWhat passivity actually looks like when your desires and preferences go unspokenWhy overworking isn’t just physical labor, but emotional, relational, and mental labor tooHow self-abandonment is at the core of people pleasing and putting yourself lastWhy joy, fun, and play can be nourishment instead of something you earn after workFind Sara here:https://sarafisk.coachhttps://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationshttps://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachhttps://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

Learning to have my own back is the most powerful thing I’ve ever done for myself, which is why I’m bringing back this essential episode as we head into the new year. Many women internalize their mistakes, leading to a spiral of shameful thoughts that can be very draining. But how can we shut that down? If we bully ourselves, then we're not safe with ourselves, and we're not safe anywhere. You deserve that essential safety. In this episode, I'll help you identify the bullying voice in your head and shut it down. Here’s what I cover:How to recognize the internal bully in your own voice and why certain “questions” are actually accusationsWhy being unsafe with yourself creates shame spirals that drain hours of your time and energyA powerful reframe using your younger self to stop self-bullying before it takes overTwo practical ways to shut down the brain bully: the hard pass and loving engagementHow having your own back makes it possible to take risks, try new things, and live with more freedomFind Sara here:https://sarafisk.coachhttps://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationshttps://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachhttps://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult

This week, I’m bringing back one of the most meaningful and widely listened-to episodes of the podcast. The patriarchal, capitalist, Western way of life imposes certain values and expectations on the way women think, feel, and choose to live. When we fail to meet these expectations, we can often feel lackluster or unsatisfied. Even if we do attain these expectations, there is always another critique looming about the deficit in our lives. In this episode, we will discuss how perfectionism is a manifestation of these societal pressures, and explore ways to shift our mindset to focus on being better, rather than perfect. Here’s what I cover:The importance of celebrating our daily small wins rather than fixating on what we could do betterHow the word “better” becomes an invisible authority that keeps women stuck and self-doubtingWhy women are taught not to let emotional labor, grief, or inner work count as real successHow it's possible to feel accomplished in this society by doing things that bring us joy and make us feel wholeA simple practice for letting accomplishments land in the body instead of dismissing themFind Sara here:https://sarafisk.coachhttps://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversationshttps://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoachhttps://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!Book a Free Consult