Claim OwnershipRecoverU | Betrayal Trauma, Sex Addiction Support, Betrayal Recovery, Reconciliation, Porn Addiction Recovery
Subscribed: 37Played: 543
Subscribe
© Copyright 2025 All rights reserved.
Description
Are you a wife who has discovered her husband is a porn or sex addict and you’re feeling overwhelmed and worried about the future?
Are you a couple navigating recovery trying to rebuild trust and connection after betrayal but struggling to navigate the triggers and emotions that come up?
Hi I’m Kylene, a betrayed partner in recovery, and Patrick, a former sex addict in recovery. In 2021, we found ourselves lost, overwhelmed and scared, having no idea if our relationship would survive or if we could heal as individuals.
Thankfully, we got connected to powerful recovery tools quickly and began doing healing work both individually, and together.
Now, we are 4 years in recovery and we have moved from lack of trust, to deep trust. From triggers and rumination every day to few and far between. From having a completely destroyed relationship, to creating a new, beautiful and happy relationship with 2 new, healed people.
Kylene works as a betrayal recovery coach to help women move from trauma to transformation and Patrick runs several recovery groups locally for men guiding them from addiction to sobriety to deep recovery.
In this podcast you will find vulnerable stories, real life application, tools, resources, mindset work, and everything you need to step into FULL recovery whether you are the spouse who has been betrayed, the addict working to get into deep recovery, or a couple wanting to reconcile the relationship.
Let’s do this together!
Next steps:
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://linktr.ee/KyleneTerhune
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoverU
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
Are you a couple navigating recovery trying to rebuild trust and connection after betrayal but struggling to navigate the triggers and emotions that come up?
Hi I’m Kylene, a betrayed partner in recovery, and Patrick, a former sex addict in recovery. In 2021, we found ourselves lost, overwhelmed and scared, having no idea if our relationship would survive or if we could heal as individuals.
Thankfully, we got connected to powerful recovery tools quickly and began doing healing work both individually, and together.
Now, we are 4 years in recovery and we have moved from lack of trust, to deep trust. From triggers and rumination every day to few and far between. From having a completely destroyed relationship, to creating a new, beautiful and happy relationship with 2 new, healed people.
Kylene works as a betrayal recovery coach to help women move from trauma to transformation and Patrick runs several recovery groups locally for men guiding them from addiction to sobriety to deep recovery.
In this podcast you will find vulnerable stories, real life application, tools, resources, mindset work, and everything you need to step into FULL recovery whether you are the spouse who has been betrayed, the addict working to get into deep recovery, or a couple wanting to reconcile the relationship.
Let’s do this together!
Next steps:
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://linktr.ee/KyleneTerhune
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoverU
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
138 Episodes
Reverse
In today's episode, Kylene and Patrick share several experiences to anticipate as you navigate initial sobriety from porn or sex addiction patterns including:
Dreams and Intrusive Thoughts
Uncomfortable Emotions
Nocturnal Emissions
Alternative coping mechanisms or behaviors
They discuss the importance of choice through sobriety, how deep recovery means living a life making conscious choices vs falling into the belief that life just happens to you.
They also share some basic techniques to help in the moment of stress in order to feel more grounded, become more present, and step into conscious choice.
They mentioned the Intrusive Thoughts Episode: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000652006011
and the Faster Scale which they discuss in more detail in this episode: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000658758308
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
Content Warning: Today's episode is discussing some of traumatic events that have happened in our society lately and that are all over the news leading to a heavier episode. Please be aware of where you are in your recovery if this episode is appropriate for you.
Things we discuss:
The impact of national violence and how it impacts us individually
How societal change starts individually
The importance of connection and community for mental health, grieving and healing
Our personal faith and how it impacts our views on how we love others
Kylene's health scares and how they impact her view of the world and her life
While this episode is heavier than most, we hope it also helps you feel seen, encouraged, and loved.
Life and recovery are rarely simple. Sometimes, unique dynamics add even more layers to an already complex journey.
In this episode, Kylene and Patrick explore three challenging scenarios that can complicate the recovery process:
What if the betrayed partner has also struggled with addiction but in another form?
What if the betrayed partner has also had an affair in the past?
What if the betrayed partner has looked at porn?
Together, they unpack why personal responsibility matters, how choosing individual health impacts the relationship, and the importance of showing empathy for the pain we may have caused—whether intentional or not—even when we’ve been hurt ourselves.
These are tough conversations, and one episode can’t cover every nuance. We encourage you to seek guidance from trusted professionals who can support you in your unique situation.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
As much as we wish it were, healing isn't always linear. There are ups and downs, and moments where we are living happily in the present and are reminded of the past.
In today's episode Kylene and Patrick share about grief, how confusing it can feel for the betrayed partner, and how important it is to recognize that healing doesn't mean we forget what happened.
It's normal for thoughts, emotions or memories to come up years later, and it's important to create safety with each other in order to have connecting conversations together.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
Boundaries aren't just helpful for the hurt spouse, they are crucial for the recovering spouse as well. They can create structure, offer safety and give the betrayed partner the information they need in order to make decisions about the future of the relationship.
There are many individuals that struggle with the idea of boundaries. In today's episode, we offer some reframes around what boundaries mean and how to think about them in order to feel confident using your voice.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In this episode, Kylene and Patrick explore the difference between compliance—“just checking the boxes”, and true proactivity, where personal responsibility becomes the driving force of recovery.
They share why compliance alone can feel hollow, often leaving betrayed partners frustrated as they wait for their spouse to engage in recovery with equal energy and commitment.
Together, they unpack why consistency matters, and how the power of repetition creates the foundation for lasting, meaningful healing.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In today’s episode, Kylene and Patrick discuss healthy sexuality after betrayal, addiction and infidelity. What is healthy sexuality? Why is consent so important and what does that look like?
They share thoughts on what plays into our beliefs around sexuality and their own personal experiences around healing.
They mention the Raabsmiths book: “Building True Intimacy” which you can see here: https://raabsmithteam.com
Kylene and Patrick share more on reconnecting sexually after betray in these previous episodes as well:
Sex Through Recovery - Year 1 - Ep 54: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000649141817
Establishing True Intimacy - Ep 55: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000649843594
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In today’s brief episode, Kylene and Patrick continue the conversation from last time, where they explored the difference between finding someone attractive and feeling sexual arousal in recovery. This time, they share key resources that have influenced their understanding of healthy sexuality and reinforce the empowering truth that we can take ownership of our thoughts, behaviors, and responses. With this mindset, recovery becomes a pathway to navigating the world with greater confidence, clarity, and self-control.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In today's episode Kylene and Patrick answer a question about a recovering addict being attracted to women in yoga pants. When is noticing someone is attractive a threat to the betrayed partner or to their own sobriety/recovery?
They discuss objectification vs humanizing and how seeing someone as a whole human being makes a difference.
They share how being able to walk in the world feeling free no matter what you see or are exposed to, is the goal - and an attainable one- through recovery.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In this short episode. Patrick reflects on his divorce, and parenting through that time. He shares his perspective and lived experience of divorce after infidelity, and starting over with almost nothing while also realizing that it was the healthiest choice in his particular circumstances.
If you would like to listen to the previous episode that we refer to around children and divorce you can go to episode #123 or click here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000717502361
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In this episode, Kylene and Patrick explore five essential things a betrayed partner needs from their spouse in order to truly heal. They unpack each element with depth and honesty, including:
Taking full responsibility without minimizing or making excuses
Creating safety—especially by addressing power dynamics and physical presence
Making her feel seen, chosen, and prioritized
Recovering for yourself, not just to save the relationship
Demonstrating long-term consistency and follow-through
Patrick shares personal insights and real-life experiences as they walk through each step. Together, they explain why these actions are not just helpful—but crucial— after betrayal.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
Today, Kylene walks through what steps can help us navigate triggers and calm ruminating thoughts after betrayal. She discusses:
1. Why safety is the foundation that has to be laid first and what that looks and feels like
2. How subconscious processing is what really moves the needle when we have sticky triggers
3. The importance of identifying core wounds to really resolve the root of the recurring thoughts
Previous episodes mentioned:
5 practical ways to create safety after discovering your spouse is a porn or sx addictvt: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000715418229
Intrusive Thoughts and Recovery - Calming you mind with less work: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000652006011
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In today's episode, Carly and Kylene are discussing things to consider when navigating betrayal, reconciliation, divorce and children. We understand that this is a complex conversation and this episode is not saying there is one right or wrong answer - rather, we are sharing some thoughts and perspectives that we hope may be helpful.
They discuss Carly's personal experience and thoughts around her parents divorce, the importance of bringing children into age appropriate communication, and why honesty is so important.
You can learn more about Carly and her work here: https://www.carlyinfocus.com
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In today’s episode, Kylene and Patrick discuss what ingredients are involved in a healthy marriage. These include:
Liking each other as friends
Emotional support for each other
Playing on the same team
Being willing to apologize and take responsibility for your own behavior
Freedom and safety in every aspect of the relationship
After betrayal and through addiction recovery, couples have a real opportunity to start from scratch, taking anything that was healthy and good before, and rooting out anything that’s unhealthy while they create something brand new together.
Today, Kylene ad Patrick discuss how these pillars helped them in their relationship and why they believe they are foundational for health in any relationship.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In today's episode Kylene and Patrick walk through 5 practical and actionable steps to consider after discovery. What actually helps create stability when you're just beginning your recovery journey?
Here are 5 steps to consider:
Sleeping in separate spaces to give yourself the opportunity to reset and recover
Setting boundaries around communication
Getting connected to practitioners specializing in addiction and betrayal
Making sure the basic modes of addiction are shut down/blocked
Create a plan - work with your practitioner and spouse to create a plan that works for you
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
--
To your health,
Kylene Terhune Betrayal Recovery Coach
Host of RecoverU podcast
FDN-P, Master NLP life coach, Master QTT practitioner
Are you a betrayed partner? Join my free FB group RecoverU here
This week Kylene and Patrick discuss 3 mindsets that will set you up for success in recovery and how those impact the betrayed partner and the addict in their journeys.
I am more than my circumstances
Healing is possible for everyone, but requires change and change is uncomfortable
There is something better that is available to me
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In today’s episode, Jackie Newman shares about the journal/workbook she co-authored called Unapologetically You.
Unapologetically You is your personal companion on a transformative journey towards inner peace, emotional healing, and self-awareness. This journal offers a collection of guided prompts, exercises, and reflective spaces to help you reconnect with your true self, heal old wounds, and embrace the fullness of who you are.
This journal is a reminder that healing is not a destination, but a beautiful, ongoing process. Step into the best version of yourself and begin your journey of healing today.
Today we walk through the 5 sections of the journal including:
Safety
Connection to Self
Grounding and Self-Care
Journaling
Inspiration
And share how the journal helps betrayed partners feel more grounded and move forward on their healing journey
Conference:https://csbdhopeforhealing.org
Jackies website: https://www.ampersandintegrative.com
Barnes and Noble book link: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/unapologetically-you-jackie-newman/1147552402?ean=9798317694548
Lulu: https://www.lulu.com/shop/jackie-newman-and-grounding-grace-co/unapologetically-you/paperback/product-q6dk69y.html?srsltid=AfmBOoqyShlvGtOuXn_ULA7SWh7iWJ_yVMOpVkjLX3sznvolFCNU8Zw0&page=1&pageSize=4
Previous episode with Jackie Newman:
Prepping for disclosure: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000634888047
Today’s episode is a speech that Kylene was asked to present about overcoming adversity. She shares some of her own story as well as 3 keys she notices helps her and others move through painful experiences: Value, Clarity and Courage —> Knowing who you are, getting clarity on the future, and having courage to take steps towards it.
She shares these 5 truths:
You are not responsible for the behavior, reactions or thinking of others.
You are responsible for your own behavior - show up with integrity every day - if you can go to bed at the end of the day and say - I did my best - that’s all you can do
Mistakes are ok when we take responsibility for them
You are more than your experiences - in other words, negative things that happen in our lives do not have to become our identity
You are worthy and valuable just as you are - because you exist - and you don’t have to accomplish anything for that statement to be true.
Episode on self confidence vs self worth: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000708437532
Episode with future you meditation: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recoveru-betrayal-trauma-sex-addiction-support-betrayal/id1674653111?i=1000611570008
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
In todays episode, Patrick shares his thoughts on 3 important principles for a sex addict to remember in recovery:
It takes time - don’t expect your betrayed partner to recover from discovery quickly. There are many factors that play into their ability to heal and everyone’s relationship and trauma level is different. Healing and relational reconciliation is a lifelong commitment.
Demonstrate consistency so you can create safety for your partner.
Be proactive. Make sure your motivation comes internally - your spouse shouldn’t have to push you to move through your own recovery.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
Sometimes divorce isn’t just admissible, it’s beneficial. When a relationship hinders one or both parties from moving forward in health, divorce may be the best choice.
Kylene and Patrick know that there are many reasons that a couple may struggle with this decision including faith based guilt, internalized people pleasing, financial reasons, children etc… This is an nuanced conversation, and one that a single episode certainly will not cover in its entirety.
We are not here to tell you what to do. Instead, we are sharing some situations where divorce may be the healthiest option (outside of abusive situations which we do not focus on in this episode).
We hope this episode takes the pressure off, lets you take a deep breath and know that if you are heading down the path of divorce, there is nothing wrong with you. A relationship takes TWO people fully committed to work.
If you are listening to this episode and struggling with this decision we are sending you so much love.
If you are a betrayed partner and would like to connect with Kylene for 1:1 coaching support, please click this link and book a free connection call: https://p.bttr.to/3ttk0Ql
Submit Questions and Feedback to the RecoverU podcast here: https://forms.gle/uww5sWK1WP8T8dbc8
Join the free RecoverU Facebook page for betrayed partners: www.facebook.com/groups/recoveru2
For addicted spouses check our puredesire.org and soulrefiner.org
Follow Kylene:
On TikTok: @KyleneTerhune
On IG: @KyleneTerhune
Comments
Download from Google Play
Download from App Store
United States