Beat Motel Zine

Ever bought an album just because you should love it... only to file it under "respect, but no thanks"? This week, Andrew Culture and Dr. Sam go full chin-strokey and dive deep into the bands, albums, and entire genres that make them go, "I get it. I just don't want it." We're talking Flux of Pink Indians' sonic assaults, John Zorn's sex-jazz chaos, Minutemen's minute-long jazz-punk spasms, and yes, that unholy racket from Merzbow. Along the way we also chat about Damon Albarn's trouser-based stage antics, Janis Joplin's wardrobe malfunctions, and what happens when Rick Wakeman tries to write a stadium-rock opera about Henry VIII's wives. Seriously. It's an episode filled with love for the bold, the bizarre, and the borderline unlistenable. So grab your brandy, light your pipe, and stroke your chin in a disapproving-yet-respectful fashion. What you'll learn this episode: Why Andrew would rather chew tinfoil than listen to Merzbow again What makes Dr. Sam say "this is basically an angry Jackson Pollock painting" Who wins the battle of "I admire them, but no thanks" — Apex Twin or The Minutemen? Why Flux of Pink Indians were literally banned by the police (hint: it wasn't for being catchy) The sexy noises of John Zorn and why jazz speedrunning should be a sport Plus! Music recommendations, tangents about driving in America, dodgy cod reggae, and why you should never trust someone who plays saxophone and wears a beret.   🎸 Riffs of the Week 👉 Dr. Sam's Riff: Danny Brown – Copycat 👉 Andrew's Riff: Die Spitz – Throw Yourself to the Sword 🎵 Dr. Sam's Track Choices: 1. Flux of Pink Indians – The Fucking Cunts Treat Us Like Pricks 2. John Zorn – Erotico (The Burglars) 3. Taraf de Haidouks – The Return of The Magic Horses 4. Merzbow – Woodpecker No. 2 🎵 Andrew's Track Choices: 1. Aphex Twin – Windowlicker 2. Rush – Spirit of Radio 3. Minutemen – This Ain't No Picnic 4. Primus – Tommy the Cat 📧 Email us: beatmotel@lawsie.com

In this episode, we dive into the slightly baffling and often hilarious world of musicians turning up in films that have absolutely nothing to do with their own music. Some do it well. Some… should've just stayed on stage. From Joe Strummer's pigeon-themed songwriting to Damon Albarn's dodgy gangster role, we shine a flashlight on cinema's most unexpected rock star cameos. Expect righteous rambling, questionable facts, and a whole lot of chaos as Andrew and Dr. Sam chew over: Flea appearing in Back to the Future II as a race-happy chancer Joe Strummer pretending a traffic cone is a megaphone David Bowie's aggressively tight trousers in Labyrinth Placebo showing up in Velvet Goldmine dressed like sexy peacocks Tom Waits being better at acting than most actual actors Tim Armstrong from Rancid randomly playing a tramp in The X-Files And that time a song was written just to impress a member of Bananarama Also in this episode: We slag off Spotify for kicking us off their platform, complain about camping at festivals (again), and attempt to remember what the word "railway" sounds like without sounding like we've joined the Bullingdon Club. This one's for the cinephile who loves music, or the punk who accidentally sat through Straight to Hell thinking it was a Clash documentary. Subscribe, tune in, and remember: just because you're in a band doesn't mean you should be in a film.     Riffs of the Week Dr Sam's Riff Alpha Male Tea Party – Probably Just Hungry Andrew's Riff Ditz – Don Enzo Magic Carpet Salesman Dr Sam's Track Choices Joe Strummer – Evil Darling Alan Silvestri – 4 x 4 Tom Waits – Kommienezuspadt Rancid – Rats in the Hallway Andrew's Track Choices Spandau Ballet – True Placebo – 20th Century Boy Blur – Sing David Bowie – Magic Dance Email us – beatmotel@lawsie.com

What do stoner-era ZZ Top, a mountain named Billy with a tree girlfriend, and a kid who astral projects into Rasputin's beard all have in common? Concept albums, mate. And not just any old proggy b*llocks – this week we're diving into the oddest concept albums we could find (and a few we just wanted to waffle on about anyway). Andrew is joined by first-time Beat Motel guest host James Kindred – a fellow Ipswich musician, longtime mate, and possibly the only person who can explain a Mastodon plotline without crying blood. Together, they take you on a journey through the weird, the wonderful, and the "what the hell were they thinking?" of the concept album world. Expect the following nonsense: ZZ Top as proto-stoner gods (with bonus slipper sales) Agriculture's queer-core black metal positivity Mastodon's astral plane + Rasputin collab (yep) Frank Zappa's 40-minute tale about a mountain fighting the US government The madness of Mansun's Six – A.A. Milne gone rock Mark Lanegan scaring the life out of everyone (including Josh Homme) Brian Eno inventing ambient music while still in nappies NoFX writing an 18-minute punk symphony just to piss everyone off Throw in some jazz-metal tangents, disdain for ska-punk, and why John Hopkins makes Andrew need a wee, and you've got a classic Beat Motel episode. Warning: contains opinions. Also, possibly bears.     ### Riffs of the week   #### Kindred's Riff - Precious & Grace - ZZ Top (opening) #### Andrew's Riff - Agriculture - Bodhidharma   ### Kindred's track choices 1. Mastodon – Crack the Skye (cosmic metal odyssey) - Song - The Czar (1. Usurper, 2. Escape, 3. Martyr, 4. Spiral) 2. QOTSA – Songs for the Deaf (desert-drive fever dream) - Song - Songs for the Dead 3. Pink Floyd – The Wall (psychological rock opera) - Song - Comfortably Numb 4. Brian Eno – Music for Airports (ambient architecture for calm) Song - 1/1   ### Andrew's track choices 1. Frank Zappa and the mothers of invention - Billy was a mountain 2. Mansun - Legacy 3. NoFx - The Decline 4. John Hopkins - Tayos Caves, Ecuador i   Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

If you've ever flipped a vinyl and thought, "well that was a limp finish," then this episode is your new religion. Andrew and Dr. Sam dive into the fine art of ending Side A—the lost craft of crafting a sonic cliffhanger that makes you want to flip that record like your nan flips a Digestive into her cuppa. We've got: The Clash's perfectly measured chaos An R.E.M. song even the R.E.M. boys can't remember Richard Dawson punching you in the feelings A mystery smackhead guitar hero who wandered into a Funkadelic session and laid down one of the greatest solos of all time And very strong feelings about Brett Anderson's 12" misadventure with Suede's "Stay Together" (hint: the band hate it, and Andrew can't stop hearing horn sections) Throw in some serious digressions about class consciousness, cat whiskers, baked beans in mouths, and Gregg's colonisation of the high street, and you've got yourself a full-fat Beat Motel stew. Dave Rowntree of Blur sues PRS over 'black box' royalties All creatures will evolve into crabs Cats' whiskers = biological gap gauges Stripper Vicars: helping painters and decorators since 1995 Midori – "Yukiko-san" Gorillaz ft. Sparks – "The Happy Dictator" Grab a pint, slap on your headphones, and ask yourself – how does YOUR favourite album end Side A? Stuff that might be true (but we didn't check):     ### Riffs of the week   #### Dr Sam's Riff - Midori - Yukikosan (0:19) #### Andrew's Riff - Gorillaz Ft. Sparks - The Happy Dictator   ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. The Clash - Straight to Hell (4.30) 2. Funkadelic - Get Off Your Ass and Jam (1.33) 3. Armstrong & Ellington - Do Nothing 'Til You Hear From Me (opening) 4. Richard Dawson - Two Halves (0.29)   ### Andrew's track choices 1. The Stone Roses - Bye Bye Badman 2. Mansun - Stripper Vicar 3. REM - Can't get there from here 4. Suede - Stay Together   Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

Ever watched a music doc and thought, "Cor, this band's story is brilliant!" only to press play on their actual music and feel your soul quietly retreat into your ankles? This week, Andrew and co-host Dr. Sam put the needle on the record and realise some bands should've stayed in the cutting room. We take a scenic drive through the trainwreck glory of Milli Vanilli, the baffling existential crisis that is Metallica's St. Anger, and the CIA's alleged soft-rock psy-op via The Scorpions. Plus, there's a detour through the fever-dream nonsense of Brian Pern, Joan Jett's bad reputation, and the ongoing mystery of why The Sex Pistols are still interesting despite sounding like a wasp in a tin mug. Expect spiky opinions, tight trousers, and the occasional descent into lyrical despair. And yes, there's hummus chat. Of course there is. What's inside: Bands who are great… as a subject, not as a sound Can AI replace all pop music? (And should it?) Was Wind of Change written by the bloody CIA? Stretchy testicles and Mob Dad: Your new Cartoon Network faves Come for the music chat. Stay for the jalapeño hummus.     ### Riffs of the week   #### Dr Sam's Riff - Barbara Dane - I Hate the Capitalist System (opening) #### Andrew's Riff - I'll pay you more if you let me watch - Crippling Alcoholism (3:40)   ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Milli Vanilli - Take it as it comes (opening) 2. Scorpions - Loving You Sunday Morning (2.43) 3. Metallica - "Shoot Me Again" (0.35) 4. Joan Jett - "Bad Reputation" (0.30)   ### Andrew's track choices 1. Bros - When will I be famous (2:09) 2. Brian Pern 3. Sex Pistols - Silly Thing (0:36) 4. The Lurkers - Ain't got a clue   Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com   We dig music podcast - https://pod.link/wedigmusic   This is the episode with Crippling Alcoholism on it -   We Dig Music - Series 8 Episode 9 - Now Playing Sept 2025 - Magdalena Bay, Crippling Alcoholism, & Ethel Cain   https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/we-dig-music-series-8-episode-9-now-playing-sept-2025/id1246759934?i=1000728773079   https://open.spotify.com/episode/0wBWpR24jRvxRKw7YL1Z8b?si=LbwRnR38RnOhOaC-09MSpg

This week on Beat Motel, Andrew relives his childhood by rolling down Ed Sheeran's hill into a pile of dog muck, and Dr. Sam reveals he's spent more time chasing cheese than dignity. Somewhere along the way, they accidentally remember this is supposed to be a music podcast. The theme? Cats. That's it. Not subtle. Not deep. Just cats. From SpongeBob's snail-pet Gary to the purring sleaze of Queen's "Cool Cat," we dig into feline-inspired tunes like they're buried in a litter tray. Expect: A semi-academic breakdown of The Cure's "Lovecats" A loving rant about Citric Dummies reviving Dr. Sam's faith in punk The Stray Cats (who aren't British, but fooled us all) Psychobilly hair, ska that doesn't suck, and why Jules Holland might secretly be a dog person A jazz track from 1931 that the BBC had to rename because it was "too rude" (spoiler: it wasn't about a cat, but we're pretending it was) Andrew's website gets cyber-attacked mid-show (presumably by a Japanese feline overlord), and we waste far too much time translating song titles through every Nordic and Baltic language available. We also discover the only way to pick a cat from a rehoming café is to let it slap you in the face. It's a mess. It's musical. It's got Matt Berry rubbing a snail on his face. It's Beat Motel at its most confusingly brilliant. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Citric Dummies - I Am Your Napkin #### Andrew's Riff - vildhjarta - + byta ut alla stjärnor på himlen mot plustecken + ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Spongebob - Gary's Song 2. Stray Cats - Stray Cat Strut 3. Queen - Cool Cat 4. Presidents of the United States of America - Kitty ### Andrew's track choices 1. The Cure - Love cats 2. Squeeze - Cool for cats 3. The Slackers - El Gato 4. Harry Roy & His Bat Club Boys - My girl's pussy Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

If you've ever wondered what a Finnish man in a bedroom with a broken keyboard sounds like, then you're weird. But also in the right place. This week, Dr. Sam joins Andrew for a dive headfirst into the murky swamp of obscure music genres, where rules don't matter and the cats are in charge. Expect tangents galore: from liturgical black metal to folk electronica via squee (yes, it's a thing), this episode is a chaotic tour of sounds you probably never asked for. There's also rants about Winamp, philosophical crises over Adam Buxton's new album, and an alarming amount of discussion about bodily functions—human and feline. Other highlights: Discover why Primus are their own genre. Chatpile vs. Nick Cave (don't @ us). The truth about the Super Mario cartoon theme. What happens when cats demand mid-podcast poo patrol. Childhood trauma via 70s UK sitcoms and cartoons. So, whether you're sickening for a new genre or just want to hear two middle-aged blokes descend into sonic madness, this episode will either enlighten or deeply confuse you. Either way, you'll come out the other end feeling like you've learned something. Probably. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Adam Buxton - Doing it Wrong (0.18) #### Andrew's Riff - Chatpile - Shame (2:24) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Primus - Restin' Bones (2.13) 2. Ana Lua Caiano - Ando Em Círculos (opening) 3. Thomas Ignatius - Sum qui sum (1.00) 4. Super Mario Rap (0.2) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Suicide - Ghost Rider (1:24) - No Wave 2. Eero Johannes - We Could Be Skweeeroes - Skweee 3. Batushka - Yekteniya I - Liturgical Black Metal 4. Phace - Hot Rock - Neurofunk Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

In this nostalgia-drenched episode of Beat Motel, Andrew Culture and voiceover man extraordinaire Martin Whiskin hurl themselves headfirst into the deep, murky swimming pool of school memories—and promptly slip on a Verucca sock. Expect less of a structured discussion and more of a chaotic ramble through: Drinking out of pickle jars, Nutella jars, and possibly things we shouldn't mention. Childhood trauma via public service announcements that were more "accidental snuff film" than "safety first." Rollerskating on dodgem floors, fights over tractors, and smoking on tractors. The weird tribal warfare between grunge kids and ravers (spoiler: bomber jackets were tactical gear). And yes, a deep dive into why the f**k "Funkytown" played on a school jukebox every single day. We also spin some musical back-to-school picks, featuring the Replacements, Pop Will Eat Itself, Ramones, Red Hot Chili Peppers (Martin is very sorry), Despond, and Ganja Kru. There's even a serious attempt to connect jungle music to GCSE coursework. God help us. Plus: We try to remember what Grange Hill was called, and forget everything else in the process. This one's for the misfits at the back of the classroom. Probably the only podcast episode where you'll hear the A-Team theme, tales of aristocratic mastering engineers, and the sentence: "Did your mum ever bring home 200 dead man's harmonicas?" #### Marf's Riff - Despondent - Confined #### Andrew's Riff - Blackbraid - And he become the burning stars ### Marf's track choices 1. Pop Will Eat Itself - Karmadrome 2. The A-Team TV Theme Tune 3. Red Hot Chili Peppers - They're Red Hot 4. Super Sharp Shooter - The Ganja Kru ### Andrew's track choices 1. The Replacements - Fuck School 2. Ski Sunday theme tune 3. The Ramones - Rock and roll high school 4. Lipps Inc. - Funkytown Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

Ever wondered what it's like to be whipped in the cobblers by a carbon fibre tent pole? No? Well, you're about to. In this episode, Andrew returns to the studio and brings along Dr. Sam for a high-brow chat about testicular trauma, Trev & Simon, and the absolute best music to make your hips involuntarily wiggle like an over-caffeinated toddler. The theme this week? Songs to swing your pants to. The result? A genre-skirting playlist filled with funkadelic basslines, ska-punk chaos, and whatever Clipping are doing (which might be witchcraft). From George Clinton's Moog-powered madness to the playful brilliance of Little Simz, from Missy Elliott in an inflatable suit to Dexys being much more than "Come On Eileen," this episode jumps between groin injuries, nostalgia, street crossings turned flags (ffs), and musical elitism that would make a vinyl collector blush. We also learn about ancient British tribes, the legitimacy of "potholes in lawns," and how you can use "in Minecraft" to legally dodge confessions. It's educational. Sort of. Mostly not. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Barren Path - The Insufferable Weight #### Andrew's Riff - Clipping - Dominator ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Thumpasaurus - Struttin' 2. Streetlight Manifesto - If and When We Rise 3. Dexy's Midnight Runners - Jackie Wilson Said 4. Little Richard - Keep A Knockin' ### Andrew's track choices 1. Everything Everything - Cough Cough 2. Missy Elliot - WTF (where you from) 3. Funkadelic - One Nation 4. Little Simz - 101fm Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com Elitists https://www.instagram.com/reel/DJwcMyToUUK/?igsh=MTR4dWFnOGR5anV5bw==

What is it about British summer holidays that brings out the absolute weirdest memories? Andrew Culture is joined by returning co-host and beard-stroking wordsmith Martin Whiskin for a full-tilt, memory-lane-meets-puke-stained-train episode about all things "Summer Holidays." We kick off with threats from Grotbags, traumatising pantos, and a deep dive into the bizarre puppetry obsession of '80s kids TV. From Bob Carolgees and Spit the Dog to the musical trauma inflicted by Orville, it's a warped nostalgia trip with the distinct smell of Dettol. Expect riffs of the week that range from children's YouTube bangers to industrial J-pop-metal chaos. Martin finds beauty in Down By Law's one-minute face-punch punk, Therapy?'s surprise chart invasion, and the unlikely Shed Seven resurgence. Andrew counters with a romantic tale of vomit at the Steamboat pub, a Double Deckers TV theme tribute, and a Queens of the Stone Age song that's basically just a shopping list of narcotics. Also covered: Why Cliff Richard was in a bus with The Shadows How band advances don't work Punk shows in Welsh working men's clubs Why you never want to eat a dry roll with one slice of iceberg lettuce The fine art of projectile vomiting into jacket sleeves If you've ever wanted a podcast episode that transitions seamlessly from 'Summer Holiday' by Cliff Richard to vomming on the tube while discussing Trash Theory's Therapy? documentary, this is it. Music, memories, mayhem. This is Beat Motel. ### Riffs of the week #### Marf's Riff - Danny Go - Gorilla Smash #### Andrew's Riff - BABYMETAL - from me to u feat. Poppy ### Marf's track choices 1. Blameless - Breathe a Little Deeper 2. Down by Law - Independence Day 3. Therapy? - Screamager 4. Shed Seven - Kissing California ### Andrew's track choices 1. Cliff Richard and The Shadows - Summer Holiday 2. Johnny Keating - Theme from the Double Deckers 3. The Jesus And Mary Chain - I Can't find The Time For Times 4. Queens of the Stone age - Feel good hit of the summer Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com Jesus and Mary Chain playlist https://tidal.com/playlist/5d9661ef-d473-477e-8e59-9c069d2b1267

Ever argued over who controls the aux cable on a long drive? In this episode of the Beat Motel Podcast, Andrew and Dr Sam dive into the tunes that keep them sane (or send them spiralling) on epic car journeys. From Queen's Greatest Hits to post-metal tantrums, and from Pete Seeger's calm reassurance to jazz-adjacent Icelandic loops, we dissect the soundtracks that power our road trips, intentional or accidental. Expect ridiculous stories involving bargain-bin CDs, iPad vomit catchers, and why you should never, ever start a circle pit with only 12 people in the venue. Plus, we ask the big questions like: why is Disney music turning up at protests? And is clapping during a gig actually a war crime? 📌 Don't miss a second, click play and take a long drive with us (from the safety of your headphones). ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Editrix - The Queen (opening) #### Andrew's Riff - GoGo Penguin - Umbra (1:30) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Harry Belafonte - Angelina (0.38) 2. Pete Seeger - Little Boxes (Live) (0.09) 3. Edvard Grieg - March of the Trolls, Op. 54 (2.18) 4. Queen - Somebody to Love (0.30) ### Andrew's track choices 1. Public Image Ltd - Careering (3:13) 2. Danger Man Theme Edwin Astley Orchestra (0:11) 3. Kiasmos - Looped (3:45) 4. Godspeed You Black Emperor - Like antennas to heaven (5:29) Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

In this special detour from our usual Beat Motel rambling, Andrew and Dr. Sam swap the studio for the chaos of Hellsinki Metal Festival (yes, with two Ls, because one L just isn't metal enough). We navigate Finnish beer, dodge suspicious wrestling moves, and try to work out why 8% lager is even legal in a place with mosh pits. Expect unfiltered commentary on bands like Kanonenfieber, Decapitated, and Fear Factory, plus on-the-ground insights into earplug economics, dungaree etiquette at metal gigs, and whether wrestling at a metal fest is meant to be taken seriously (spoiler: no). We also wonder why no other Brits seem to have worked out that Finnish festivals are cleaner, better run, and infinitely less likely to smell like a port-a-loo graveyard. It's loud, it's wet, it's metal, and it's gloriously daft — just the way we like it.

This episode of the Beat Motel Podcast drops you into the sweaty, glorious middle of a music fundraiser that brought Bury St Edmunds together in the loudest way possible. I hit the Hunter Club and the town's rehearsal rooms to catch a full day of DIY brilliance, chat with bands and scene-makers, and find out what happens when a town fights for its music spaces. Whether you're into punk, indie, or just stories of people doing something real, this one's for you. No fluff, no filler, just the kind of energy that keeps scenes alive and rehearsal rooms open. 📌 Featuring: Field recordings from the event Stories from bands and organisers Loud music and louder opinions Proof that local scenes still matter

Is it possible to judge an album by its cover? Absolutely. Especially when it's got skeleton hands, raging suns, or Geiger's flesh nightmares on it. In this episode of the Beat Motel podcast, Andrew and recurring co-host Martin Whiskin dive deep into the album art that shaped our musical tastes, plastered our pencil cases, and possibly got Dead Kennedys sued. From the raw power of Monster Magnet and Kyuss, to the delicate doodles of The Levellers, to Pink Floyd being accused of ripping off Blur 20 years early (or was it the other way round?), it's a deep, noisy, nostalgic ride. ▶ Featuring tales of crusty gigs, folk festivals, DIY patches, and massive, illegal sound systems. ▶ Not featuring: tasteful restraint, coherent structure, or Richard Ashcroft's blessing. ### Riffs of the week #### Martin Whiskin's Riff - Bellowhead - Rigs of The Time #### Andrew's Riff - Smote - Drommon Pt1 ### Martin Whiskin's track choices 1. Monster Magnet - Power Trip 2. Levellers - Levelling the Land 3. Ye Wiles - Soothing Away The Horrors of Indigestion 4. Kyuss - Welcome to Sky Valley ### Andrew's track choices 1. Pink Floyd - See Emily Play 2. Verve - She's a superstar 3. Led Zepplin - Gallows Pole 4. Dead Kennedys - MTV - Get Off the Air Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

Episode 140: Great Bands, Awful Names (feat. Dr Sam) Brace yourselves for a melodic mess as Andrew and the returning legend Dr Sam dive into the world of bands that slap sonically but utterly fumble the name game. From the majestic chaos of Defeated Sanity (yes, really) to the ultra-bland University, it's a wild ride of killer riffs and cringe monikers. Expect: Funkadelic basslines from Graham Central Station (who apparently named themselves after a sodding train station). Deep thoughts on Car Seat Headrest (sounds like IKEA flatpack instructions, but damn, they're good). A loving roast of Hanoi Rocks (plus a bit of Michael Monroe fanboying). Death metal that sounds like it was named by a teen with a Latin dictionary and a nosebleed. There's also the usual chaos: kebab regrets, biscuit philosophy, Monster Munch trauma, and why headless basses should be banished to the fiery pit. Grab a non-alcoholic beer, sit on your own car seat headrest, and prepare for an episode that's heavier than a Greggs bag after a night out. ### Riffs of the week #### Dr Sam's Riff - Between the Buried and Me - Things We Tell Ourselves in the Dark (0.30) #### Andrew's Riff - Prolapse - Cha Cha Cha 2000 (1:00) ### Dr Sam's track choices 1. Hanoi Rocks - Malibu Beach Nightmare (0.40) 2. Graham Central Station - Release Yourself (opening) 3. Viagra Boys - Man Made of Meat (0.45) 4. Defeated Sanity - Condemned to Vascular Famine (1.43) ### Andrew's track choices 1. The Nice - America (0:40) 2. Car Seat Headrest - Drunk Drivers/Killer Whales (4:21) 3. University - Notre Dame made out of flesh (4:28) 4. Agriculture - The glory of the ocean (6:12) Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

John Peel. The man, the myth, the reason you accidentally got into Bulgarian throat singing that one time. This episode of Beat Motel is a loving, ramshackle dive into the chaotic universe of Peel Sessions. Andrew Culture is joined by Mick Derrick from Prolapse, who proves that the road from crusty-sounding band names to DIY folklore is paved with weirdness, cassette tapes, and gigs no one came to. Expect tales of friendly old men who just happen to be in Mayhem, Welsh insults passed down to daughters, and the mystery of 500 unsellable t-shirts. This episode includes: Pen-palling with Datblygu Bridget St John vs. aggressive jazz drummers How to make an album that sounds like a pub quiz gone wrong Firehose and the miracle of Mike Watt in Maida Vale And an impromptu quiz on obscure Peel Session stats that nobody really wins Also, Prolapse has a new album. We mention that too, after slagging off ragtime, waxing lyrical about noise abatement, and trying not to get sued by the estate of John Martyn. A celebration of DIY music, Peel magic, and the joy of saying "I liked them before they had a second single." ### Riffs of the week #### Mick's Riff - Sharp Pins - Lorelei #### Andrew's Riff - University - Diamond Song ### Mick's track choices 1. Datblygu - Cristion Yn Y Kibbutz 2. Bridget St. John - Ask Me No Questions 3. Yeah Yeah Noh - Blood Soup 4. Quickspace - Happy Song ### Andrew's track choices 1. Ivor Cutler - Joe's Thick Coat (Peel Session) 2. The Auteurs - Happy birthday Buddha 3. Desperate Bicycles - The medium was tedium 4. fIREHOSE - She Paints Pictures (Peel Session) Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com John Peel photo by Duca di Spinaci https://www.flickr.com/photos/bhikku/1076455

If you've never been ready to square up in a Spoons car park over your favourite band, are you even a real music fan? In this unreasonably passionate episode, Andrew is joined by the charmingly volatile Martin Whiskin as they dive fists-first into the bands they'd get into an actual fight over. Expect tales of local legends, rag-tag riffs, posh ska punks, and very specific ball-based analogies. Featuring bands that should've made it, bands that did, and bands no one's heard of (but somehow still inspired violence), the duo unpack the emotional landmines hidden in guitar feedback. Andrew laments the trauma of his first kiss being ruined by Guns N' Roses, and Martin outs himself as the Medway scene's unofficial enforcer. Subhumans, Ruben, Waldo's Gift, Russian Circles, Inner Terrestrials, Lupen Crook and the Murderbirds, The Hold Steady... they're all here, along with a few others you'll pretend you always knew about. Come for the music chat, stay for the emotional damage. ### Riffs of the week #### Martin Whiskin's Riff - And So I Watch You From Afar - North Coast Megafauna #### Andrew's Riff - Waldo's Gift - Candifloss (LIVE) ### Martin Whiskin's track choices 1. Lupen Crook and The Murderbirds - Lest We Connect 2. Ruben - No One Wins The War 3. The Hold Steady - Your Little Hoodrat Friend 4. Hundred Reasons - I'll Find you ### Andrew's track choices 1. Subhumans - Apathy 2. Inner Terrestrials - Enter the dragon 3. Russian Circles - Fathom 4. Against Me - Those Anarcho Punks Are Mysterious Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com Frank Turner interview https://beatmotel.com/interviews/frank-turner-interview-beat-motel/

Ever looked at a band and thought, "Yeah, I'd ruin that with my presence"? Well, so have we. This week on Beat Motel, Andrew is joined once again by the mighty Oli as they dive headfirst into the chaotic world of bands they wish they'd been in. From the sleek, suited swagger of Interpol to the beer-soaked riff factories of Gentleman's Pistols, we ramble through a weird and wonderful landscape of musical desires. Expect tales of porn ties, Led Zeppelin's airborne fireplaces, and discovering why having a drum machine made from bits of a broken toaster is the height of musical cool. We also reflect on the importance of looking like a band, the magic of weird basslines, and why being in a band is just clinging to your mates while pretending it's not all a colossal waste of time. Plus, we settle the age-old debate: Would you rather play Glastonbury or the Steamboat in Ipswich? Buckle up. It's a trip. ### Riffs of the week #### Oli's Riff - Faraquet - Cut Self Not #### Andrew's Riff - Patristic - Catechesis ### Oli's track choices 1. Young Marble Giants - Eating Noddemix 2. Interpol - Heinrich Manevour 3. Led Zepellin - No Quarter 4. Beach Boys - Little Pad ### Andrew's track choices 1. Axes - Junior 2. Gentlemans Pistols-Comfortably Crazy 3. Prolapse - Headless in a beat motel 4. Blur - Won't do it Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com

In this ear-bleeding episode of Beat Motel, Andrew is joined once again by Dan Callis for a deep dive into the heavy, the noisy, and the downright daft corners of modern metal and punk. If you're here for thoughtful analysis, jog on. This is a celebration of volume, riffs, and the bands that make you question your own taste. Starting off with tech issues and a healthy dollop of despair at podcasting platforms, our lads quickly launch into a barrage of riffs. Callis brings the chaos with the likes of Big Ass Truck (yes, that's a real band and no, they're not subtle), while Andrew goes full nostalgic riff nerd with Pelican. They dish out praise (and some sass) for local legends Dude Smell, debate whether Babymetal is genius or Eurovision in disguise, and unleash rage at the fascist-flirting metalheads of yore. There's a surprise orchestral metal pick from Callis (are we feeling okay?), a hilarious tale involving Lamb of God's Randy Blythe getting locked out, and general beef with Google, Spotify, and algorithmic inshitification. Tracks from Teeth, Stray from the Path, The Haunted, and Ironstone also make an appearance in what is possibly the least coherent but most entertaining playlist you'll encounter this month. If you like your podcasts raw, sarcastic, and filled with two blokes yelling about blast beats and gig etiquette, you're in for a treat. ### Riffs of the week #### Callis's Riff - Bring me the horizon - Wonderwall #### Andrew's Riff - Dudesmell - Fatal Attraction ### Calliss track choices 1. Big Ass Truck - Big Ass Truck 2. Teeth - Blue and cold 3. Ironstone - Forgive me anew 4. Stray from the path - Fuck them all to hell ### Andrew's track choices 1. Pelican - Gulch 2. Sylosis/Heriot - The Path 3. The Haunted - Warhead 4. Purified in blood - Primal pulse thunder Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com