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The At Peace Parents Podcast is your source for all things related to understanding, supporting, accommodating, and advocating for your demand avoidant or PDA child. It will completely transform the way you think about your PDA child's brain, behavior, and parenting, and support you in finding your path to more peace and stability in the home. For more information see www.atpeaceparents.com
150 Episodes
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This is the first of three episodes about hygiene and Pathological Demand Avoidance. In this episode I focused on how to think about PDA and hygiene struggles, and understanding the root cause of struggles around:Teeth brushing Going to the dentistShowering and bathingHair washingHand washingNail clippingHair cuttingGetting dressedMore specifically, in this episode I talk through:The Deep Why behind hygiene strugglesSensory vs. Autonomy as a root cause of avoidanceThe cumulative nature of PDA and control coalescing around a basic need (in this case hygiene)Discernment - Asking yourself the right questions about burnout and whether hygiene is the "stickiest" basic need for your child or teen.Decision-making around boundaries before we worry about accommodationsI hope you find the show helpful. I'll release two more episodes on hygiene soon!xo,CaseyPS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.
In this episode I coach a mom of a 10-year-old PDAer who is in burnout (Pathological Demand Avoidance / Pervasive Drive for Autonomy). The child loves to cook and bake but has a meltdown if family members clean up after her while she’s in the kitchen. She also melts down if others pass by her bedroom on the way to their own, which her mom has to do if she’s going to clean the kitchen after her daughter leaves. We talked through if Obsessive Compulsive Disorder was also present, but decided to focus on working through the PDA lens. We then used our decision making framework to determine how the mother could manage their bedtime routine in a way that would be more pleasant for everyone. I hope you find the conversations helpful. It's from Parenting PDA Your Way, the show we stream live on our social media on Fridays at 1pm ET.xo,CaseyPS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.
In this episode I talk with our coach Donna Georgen - parent of PDA 28- and 21-year-olds - about her top tips for parenting PDA teens.This is the second of two episodes in which Donna and I discussed this topic. In the first episode we covered five of her tips, and in this episode we cover five more.Here they are:Reflect on successNormalize discomfort and fearLet go of future fearsPause social media as neededBreathe -- you're doing great!I hope you find our conversation helpful!PS - Want to work with Donna to move your family forward? She offers private coaching that you can learn all about here.
In this episode I talk with our coach Donna Georgen - parent of PDA 28- and 21-year-olds - about her top tips for parenting PDA teens. We cover five of her tips in this episode and will release another episode soon with five more. Here's the first five:Try to keep autonomy and equality at the forefrontShift from parent to mentor-friendBe vulnerable and transparentRelease the pressure to figure it all outRedefine regressionI hope you find our conversation helpful!PS - Want to work with Donna to move your family forward? She offers private coaching that you can learn all about here.
In this episode Clinical Psychologist Dr. Alex Klein and I discuss ten common misconceptions about Pathological Demand Avoidance or Pervasive Drive for Autonomy.Here are five from Dr. Klein:The parent of a PDAer is doing something wrong, especially if they've lowered demands.If a PDA child did something yesterday, they can do it again today.Accommodations won’t prepare PDA kids for the real world.Progress made by a PDA child is measured by what we see on the surface.Behaviorism (behavioral parenting) will be enough.And here are five from me, in strong collaboration with my PDA 11- and 7-year-olds:PDA kids are bad kids.How much freedom PDA kids need.It's not behavioral, it's stress.Why and when they can hide nervous system stress.Potatoes are green and they smell like poop :)I hope the episode is helpful to you!xo,CaseyPS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.
This episode is for parents who are interested in toilet training in a PDA-informed way.This the third episode in my three-part series on toileting and Pathological Demand Avoidance.In this episode I cover toilet/potty training with your PDA child or teen. Specifically, I cover the following:Is my child or teen in a good place for toilet training?Story of toilet training my older son before I knew of PDA, and why I think it still worked (spoiler - we intuitively did a lot of accommodating).10 tips for if and when you decide to toilet train your PDA child or teen.I hope this is helpful for you and your family.xoxo,CaseyPS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.
In this episode, I spoke to a grandmother raising her 8-year-old PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance / Pervasive Drive for Autonomy) Autistic grandson who she had been homeschooling for a year-and-a-half after school trauma in first grade.We discussed:- Helping her grandson attend an in-person appointment with the pediatrician, so he could get a refill of his medication.- The different approaches she could take to decide her actions in this tough situation.- The fear of losing trust and the progress they have made by forcing him to the doctor's office.- Experimenting with ideas for how to prepare her grandson for the doctor's visit with an indirect mode of communications, and how to leverage his special interest of elevators to support him accessing medical care.We hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did. It's from our live show "Parenting PDA Your Way" that I host on our social media at 1pm ET on Fridays.Warmly,CaseyPS - The grandma in this episode mentions our Paradigm Shift Program. Want to join the waitlist for the next cohort? Here's the link.
This is my second of three episodes about toileting and PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance or Pervasive Drive for Autonomy).This episode is focused on what to do if your child has challenges with:1 - Wiping2 - Accidents3 - Holding and constipation4 - Pooping outside the toilet5 - Peeing outside the toiletOf course, I'm talking through taking a PDA/nervous system approach to helping your child or teen with these challenges. If you want to take a deeper dive into understanding why your PDA child or teen has these challenges, please check out my previous podcast episode (Ep. 142).Also, in this episode I mention the decision making process I teach parents who are trying to decide when they should change their child or teen's diaper if doing so causes activation. If you want to learn more about making such decisions (or others), I teach how to do so in my free masterclass: School, Screens and Siblings, Oh My! Here's a link to where you can sign up for it for free:https://at-peace-parents-podcast.captivate.fm/sssohxo,Casey
This is my first of three episodes about toileting and PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance or Pervasive Drive for Autonomy).This episode is focused on how to think about toileting over the long term with your PDA child or teen. Specifically, I talk through:1 - Your questions in the following categories: wiping, holding and constipation, potty training, going outside the toilet, and accidents2 - Logic and root cause of toileting struggles through the PDA lens3 - What a stickiest basic need is and whether or not your child is in burnout4 - 5 things to try in your home now5 - Tracking progress so you can see clearly if this approach is helping your childI hope it’s a helpful episode for you.Xo,CaseyPS - New to PDA? You can take our free 6-minute quiz to learn how well your child or teen fits the profile.
In this episode I spoke with a mom of a 4-year-old PDAer (Pathological Demand Avoidant) and a 10-month-old baby living in an apartment in Scotland. She had just learned about PDA one month ago and had already made huge and brave changes in her home and parenting to support he son. We discussed:- How to start making a parenting paradigm shift if you are new to PDA. - The importance of an experimental mindset as you are trying out new ways of supporting and accommodating your PDA child.- How to pick your priorities for boundaries in the home. In this case we focused on safety around the baby, bedtime, and bathing once a week. - How nervous system activation is cumulative over time (months and years) for PDA children and teens, which means we don't have to be perfect with accommodations, just consistent. This episode is from the show we stream live on Fridays on our social media, "Parenting PDA Your Way." I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!With love,Casey
Sorcha Rice is an occupational therapist and the clinical manager of Neurodiversity Ireland, who I met at their 1st conference last year. She identifies as AuDHD and PDA and spoke with me about how she understands and experiences PDA, what her childhood and teen years were like before she was diagnosed, going through burnout and recovery, how she manages her nervous system now, and some of the practices she incorporates to support her PDA occupational therapy clients.It was wonderful to connect with Sorcha and hear her insights and so much of her story!I hope you enjoy it too.Xoxo,CaseyPS - You can find more about Sorcha on instagram at both @ot_sorcharice and @neurodiversityirelandAnd in our conversation she also recommended a resource for other OTs - Kim Barthel.
In this episode I speak with a mom of a six-year-old PDAer who wouldn't eat or drink and was extremely dysregulated during a holiday because of a loose tooth.We discussed:1 - how internal demands and losses of autonomy like losing a tooth matter as much as external demands.2 - the importance of understanding PDA as a fluctuating nervous system disability.3 - creative ideas for deepening accommodations the next time there is a loose tooth. I hope you find the episode helpful. It's from the show we stream live on our social media on Fridays, Parenting PDA Your Way.xo,Casey
Here's part 2 of my episode on the 10 hardest lessons I learned in 2025. They include:6 - Your PDA child can go into burnout even if you're fully accommodating them.7 - Burnout can feel like you are making no progress, especially with an internalizer.8 - Screens can be a wonderful thing.9 - Your kids will surprise you.10 - Spirituality sustained me.xoxo,Casey
Happy New Year! I'm kicking off 2026 by sharing the 10 hardest lessons I learned parenting my PDAers (often the hard way) in 2025. The first five are in this episode:1 - There are some things in life you can't outsource2 - The key to sanity is accepting constraints and finding agency within them3 - Doubt about PDA is the antidote to dogma4 - The importance of trusting yourself in the face of judgement5 - Burnout with trauma is different than burnout without traumaxo,Casey
In this episode I talk with a mom about her 7-year-old daughter - with PDA, ADHD and anxiety - about when she might help her build her frustration tolerance, and when she likely cannot.We also dive in on a specific challenge she was facing when her both her daughters need support at the same time.The conversation is from Parenting PDA Your Way, the show we stream live on our Facebook, Instagram and YouTube most Fridays at 1pm ET. I hope you find it helpful!xo,Casey
In this episode I speak with a mom of a PDA 14-year-old who regulates himself by wrestling his father after school each day, which causes Mom lots of anxiety. Together we use my cost-benefit decision making tool to weigh her options and she then decides a new strategy to try.We talked about the option of her leaving the house while the wrestling happens. And we talked through letting go of control of her husband's decision making around wrestling and care for his own back.I hope this episode is helpful for you. It's from Parenting PDA Your Way, the show we stream live on our Instagram, Facebook and YouTube most Fridays at 1pm ET.xo,Casey
In this episode I speak with a mother of a PDA teen about:Setting boundaries when other kids are involvedMaking decisions in public when you are being judgedHelping young siblings understand the PDA threat response.The episode is from Parenting PDA Your Way, the show we stream live most Fridays on our Instagram, Facebook, YouTube accounts.xoxo,Casey
In this episode I spoke with clinical psychologist Alex Klein about considerations when thinking about getting an evaluation for Autism or PDA as an adultmy own neurodivergencedoing therapy as a neurodivergent adultgetting an evaluation and therapy for your PDA child or teenI hope you find it helpful!xo,Casey
In this episode I speak with a mom about a time her daughter melted down and then wouldn't allow Mom to step away and take the pause she needed to regulate herself to be able to support her daughter. These situations are so tough - and sometimes there is nothing you can do but endure them - and so in this conversation we talked about how to find meaning in this parenting experience.This podcast episode is a recording of Parenting PDA Your Way, the show I host live on our YouTube and Facebook most Fridays at 1pm ET. I hope it's helpful to you!xo,Casey
In this episode I speak with a mom about her PDA daughter, who pinches and scratches Mom as she is falling asleep. It's a recording of Parenting PDA Your Way, the show I host live on our YouTube and Facebook most Fridays at 1pm ET. I hope it's helpful to you!xo,Casey
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For years we've tried to make sense of our son's behavior but none of the parenting books or classes ever worked for our situation. Casey's work with PDA has changed the trajectory of our family's life. Casey is constantly in my ear as I do errands, fold laundry, cook dinner, etc. I no longer feel crazy or wonder why parenting feels so hard. I am so thankful to have hope for our family's future! I 100% recommend this podcast & Paradigm Shift program!