Autistic Licence

This conversation came out of a few messages we have received around the theme of disclosing our autistic identities. We discuss our experiences and notice there is often a distinction between our professional and personal lives.  We reflect and speculate on why this might be, with particular regard to long standing relationships. We reference the impact of ableism, recognising that unmasking is both a choice and a political move which unfortunately nowadays is not always safe, helpful or desirable. Yet. It doesn't stop us doing a podcast though!  We love to hear from you - please get in touch at autisticlicence@gmail.com if you would like to join the conversation. LINKS Our Facebook Our website Podcast home Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

Ok, so this episode may be a bit niche 😉 Leo has been searching for the perfect socks and he believes he has found them ... (time will tell). Somehow, Siana's autistic brain tendrils manage to link his fervour with evangelical Christian zeal and she goes down and round about that rabbit warren for a while. We speak about our own experiences of religion as autistic people and wind up reaching quite a profound moment towards the end when we consider the significance of autistic-to-autistic mirroring on actualisation (becoming truly ourselves). We considered not releasing this episode but we realised there was quite a lot of internalised NT perceptions driving our concern, namely that it could be seen as "dull" or "boring". So we have overridden that in the interests of authenticity and in the hope that some of you might relate. Enjoy (or skip!!!) ----more----LINKS Our Facebook Our website Podcast home Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

Leo (still) has Covid. Through this conversation we wind up exploring a drive he has to be useful, to serve. We notice how this shows up between us and reflect on how it may have developed. We also consider how it might change in the future so that it becomes less of a default and more of a mindful choice.  Along the way you can expect some typical autistic literalism and a discussion about the "Drama Triangle" (roles people play).   LINKS Karpman's Drama Triangle Our Facebook Our website Podcast home Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

Trigger warning for mention of life threatening scenarios and maternal birthing distress. If you have particular sensitivities around your own experiences of healthcare please consider carefully whether and / or when you might listen to this episode.  We speak about a wide range of our experiences related to being unwell and / or navigating our healthcare needs.  This ranges from planned hospital stays to emergency admissions, from managing familiar health needs to circumstances such as giving birth and receiving vaccines.   We notice common autistic idiosyncrasies related to our perceptions of pain and discomfort. We note that many times autistic people are misunderstood and misread, which can have traumatic and isolating effects. We also reflect on self sufficiency and its limitations. And, finally!, we savour the effects of some significant interactions where we have been seen and attended to in ways which felt meaningful and profound.   We weave in some therapeutic chat related to our own communication this week while Leo has been unwell with Covid. ----more----LINKS Our Facebook Our website Podcast home Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

Trigger warning This episode deals with the topics of loneliness and suicide. Please take care of yourself and think about the timing and where your support is if you decide to listen. We reflect on our experiences and relationships in the past, which led to loneliness, disconnection and feelings of life not being worth living. We also reflect on the distinctions between company, co-regulation and presence. We recognise that these topics are heavy and in need of careful and responsible handling. At the same time, they're extremely common among the autistic community and we feel it's important to shine light on them.   LINKS Our Facebook Our website Podcast home Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

In this episode we talk about sensitivities to physical and sensory stimuli. We focus on challenges around noise, food and physical (dis)comfort. We speak about the significance of autonomy. We also discuss interpersonal misunderstandings related to us not doing "what's good" for us.  We note the important distinction here between things being seen as preferences rather than (in)tolerances. Seasonal references provided intermittently as we experience in real time the 26 minute time difference between sunset in London and Carrickfergus. And basically reflect on how we might control time were we in charge. Sure, how else would two Autistic people make meaning out of Easter?! LINKS Our Facebook Our website Podcast home Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

This episode is a spontaneous Saturday chit chat.  There's a fair amount of "here and now" energy and interaction, interspersed with memories and reflections. Siana talks about her experience of ADHD when it fires in multiple directions at once - something which for her does not exclude hyperfocus "flow" states. Leo reflects on a range of experiences he is now reframing in light of autism, such as the after effects of exhilarating events and "talking to myself". We touch on concepts such as echolalia and synaptic pruning, applying these to our own experiences and challenging some common misconceptions. We conclude that as AuDHDers, while we absolutely face challenges around over stimulation, we also have tremendous capacity for sensory joy and pleasure. LINKS Synaptic Pruning Mint Aero bar BNL shoutout Echolalia Our Facebook Our website Podcast home Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

This episode is in many ways a reflection on elements of the last one. We speak about early narratives and experiences, and the lifelong meaning and impact of these. We apply this to therapeutic contexts and approaches, specifically Transactional Analysis and Internal Family Systems, and we relate this to therapy with autistic people. We also explore the concept of so called "rigid" thinking and the possible significance of this for us as autistic people growing up in a world where the template for living which is offered to us does not fit or deliver. Special guest contribution from Phoebe - Siana's cat - in this episode 😻   LINKS Relational Transactional Analysis The Drama Triangle Life Positions Drivers & Injunctions “Know all the theories, master all the techniques, but as you touch a human soul be just another human soul.” Carl Jung Our Facebook Our website Podcast home Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

In this episode we discuss how we, as autistic people, are seen and experienced by others. We then traverse some thorny territory relating to how we see ourselves and influence each other. These are sensitive ideas and topics, interspersed with distractions, brain glitches and spiralling reasoning which somehow loops together in the end.   LINKS Neuroqueer Heresies Facebook Podcast home Our website Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

In this episode we begin to circumambulate the intersectionality of autism and queerness. We begin with Siana's home interior decorating project and finish up discussing Leo's gender identity development. In between we wax lyrical around some relationship models, notably Siana's current QPR (queer platonic relationship). Comical interlude provided by Leo's beautifully curated ritual around a previous relationship. Topic to be continued - we listen to your feedback and suggestions 🧡💛 Keep them coming! Trigger warning : brief reference to suicide in relation to trauma towards the end of this episode LINKS Queer Platonic Relationships Intersectionality Facebook Podcast home Our website Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

This episode is another “in person” recording.  We reflect on our experiences of travelling with and without accommodations. We specifically speak about the profound benefits for us of wearing a Sunflower lanyard when travelling in busy and often overwhelming airports. We also talk about the significance of our sense of smell, in particular Leo’s awareness of this in new places. NOISE WARNING: towards the end of our chat we talk about the possibility of adding a noise warning to this episode. This is because of some loud noise from people working outside during the recording. The warning wasn't necessary in the end as we were able to filter it out in the edit. Clever us! LINKS What is the Hidden Disabilities Sunflower? (hdsunflower.com) Facebook Podcast home Our website Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

We recorded this episode while we were together in Siana’s house last weekend.  We explore co-regulation and bring in various ideas and theories from autistic, therapeutic and scientific communities to flavour our discussion. We end up specifically inviting the non autistic community to join and get to know us and, most importantly, the autistic people around them. LINKS Trauma and the nervous system: a polyvagal perspective (youtube.com) Resources | Rhythm of Regulation What is the double empathy problem? (smallstepps.com) The ‘double empathy problem’: Ten years on - Damian Milton, Emine Gurbuz, Beatriz López, 2022 (sagepub.com) Facebook Podcast home Our website Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

In this episode we explore the finite nature of personal energy and capacity. We refer to our own experiences and to wider "spoon theory". The pace of this conversation is slow and relaxed; it's basically two autistic people hanging out together. If that's your vibe, we'd love you to join us 🧡💛 On that note, our Facebook community is growing fast and you would be very welcome there too - see the links below... LINKS Facebook Spoon theory Siana's talk The Traitors Podcast home Our website Our other socials Contact us at: autisticlicence@gmail.com

Leo enquires about Jungian Sandplay, a therapeutic modality Siana offers in her therapy practice. We explore Siana's demand avoidance about the prospect of speaking about this and then eventually get there in a perfectly autistic way. This is a lovely illustration of "Takiwatanga" which we happened to post about on our Facebook feed this week. Takiwatanga is the Maori word for autism which translates as "in their own time and space". Join us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61555354942260   LINKS What is demand avoidance? – PDA Society The PDA Summit 2023 (thepdaspace.com) Autistic Demand Avoidance – an example – Riko's blog: PDA and more. (wordpress.com) Petition · National Autistic Society to remove harmfully biased PDA information from their website · Change.org   Contact us autisticlicence@gmail.com Facebook facebook.com/autisticlicencepodcast Podcast home autisticlicence.podbean.com Our website autisticlicence.com Our other socials linktr.ee/autisticlicence

In this episode we explore the centrality of the core value of justice for many autistic people. We discuss the impacts on us when things aren't "right" or fair, the tenacity needed to address these and the toll this takes on us. We then tentatively begin to explore some particular ways in which our social experiences correlate with theory around masking, fawning and appeasement. LINKS Trauma 101 with Linda Thai - Learning about trauma can be empowering and transformative. When Agreement is Not Consent - Appeasement is the trauma response no one is talking about - By Rae Johnson and Nkem Ndefo Appeasement: replacing Stockholm syndrome as a definition of a survival strategy Contact us autisticlicence@gmail.com Facebook facebook.com/autisticlicencepodcast Podcast home autisticlicence.podbean.com Our website autisticlicence.com Our other socials linktr.ee/autisticlicence

In today's episode we're gearing up for the new year in our therapy practices. We reflect on therapeutic relationships and processes, wondering about and exploring those facets which might just be unique to autistic or AuDHD lives.  And we talk about our hopes and dreams for the podcast in 2024 inviting you to connect with us as we build the Autistic Licence community together.   Contact us autisticlicence@gmail.com Our website autisticlicence.com Our socials linktr.ee/autisticlicence

You are very welcome to join us here for Christmas Part 2. Recorded on Boxing Day 2023, we reflect on our "festive" experiences this year. We then springboard off a seemingly inconsequential moment we shared recently, into a deeply satisfying autistic dive. We'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences, neurospicy and otherwise. Contact us autisticlicence@gmail.com Our website autisticlicence.com Our socials linktr.ee/autisticlicence

Join us as we explore and reflect on our experiences of Christmases past and the lead up to this year's "festivities". We sensitively unpack some specific challenges the season poses for us and our neurokin. We share some of our learning from over the years and recognise this is still a work in progress. In true autistic style this episode jumps around a fair bit and diverts left, right and centre ... yet wondrously (autistically ❤️) arcs right back to where it needs to be at the end. At the time of release we tentatively intend to record again during the coming week as we are intrigued to track the process. But, y'know, demand avoidance and all that means we need some grace on the timing of all that. Thank you so, so, so, so much for all your encouragement and support over the past couple of months! This project truly delights our hearts ❤️ Contact us autisticlicence@gmail.com Our website autisticlicence.com Our socials linktr.ee/autisticlicence

Here we talk about loss and retrieval - of a car, a voice and even of the land! We reflect on the line between being perceived as "annoying" verses being curious, further expanding the pitfalls and the benefits of being #actuallyautistic in social and therapeutic contexts. Join us for a mix of complexity and so-called "info dumping" within a warm, kind and therapeutic space. LINKS Linda Thai www.linda-thai.com Trauma Geek's blog post autietraumageek.medium.com/lost-in-translation-the-social-language-theory-of-neurodivergence-part-1-of-2-1963ba0073c5 Contact us autisticlicence@gmail.com Our website autisticlicence.com Our socials linktr.ee/autisticlicence

In this episode we share some autistic joy 🤗 Expect the usual winding tangents, several 'aha!' moments and a healthy smattering of play and frivolity.   Contact us autisticlicence@gmail.com Our website https://autisticlicence.com Our socials https://linktr.ee/autisticlicence