Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is Different

Jessica Frew is back with her book, 'Shove Your Shoulds,' focusing on the unique challenges faced by neurodivergent parents.Samantha, Lauren, and Jessica discuss the emotional struggles of navigating family dynamics and the societal expectations of parenting.Jessica introduces the concept of 'mini grief' and the importance of acknowledging and processing these emotions without guilt. Emphasizing the need to release unhelpful stories and pressures, she encourages parents to let relationships develop naturally and on their own terms, fostering a safe and empowering environment for their children.Jessica also highlights the significance of redefining success and happiness for both parents and children, breaking away from conditional programming and societal benchmarks. She reassures parents that they are doing enough and underscores the importance of grace, love, and acceptance, both for themselves and their children. 00:00 Introduction00:37 Extended Conversation with Jessica Fru00:51 Struggles of Neurodivergent Parents01:52 Understanding and Accepting Grief03:42 Releasing Expectations and Stories06:02 Real-Life Examples of Relationships08:10 Letting Relationships Blossom Naturally15:02 Final Thoughts and Encouragement Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membershipConnect with Jessica: https://www.instagram.com/heyjessicafrew/Get the book: https://shoveyourshoulds.com/freebook  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Dr. Temple Grandin is a renowned animal behaviorist, autism advocate, and professor of animal science at Colorado State University. Diagnosed with autism at a young age, she has used her unique perspective to revolutionize livestock handling systems, designing humane facilities that are used worldwide. Dr. Grandin is also a best-selling author and a leading voice in the neurodiversity movement, advocating for early interventions and supportive environments for individuals on the autism spectrum. Her groundbreaking work has earned her numerous accolades, including being named one of Time magazine’s 100 most influential people. A sought-after speaker, she inspires countless people with her story of turning what others saw as challenges into her greatest strengths. Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren continue their discussion on how to communicate positively with neurodivergent children, ensuring your child receives more positive than negative feedback.They explore various strategies such as praising effort over outcome, naming invisible skills like regulation and flexibility, and using descriptive feedback instead of generic praise to help neurodivergent kids feel understood and appreciated.Samantha and Lauren emphasize the importance of catching small, neutral moments and separating behavior from identity to avoid feelings of shame. They also discuss the significance of building positive feedback into daily routines and reflecting strengths during hard moments to establish a predictable, supportive environment.They wrap up by offering practical questions parents can ask themselves to evaluate their feedback practices and promoting resources available on their website for further support. 00:00 Introduction00:40 Recap of Last Week's Episode01:22 The Importance of Positive Feedback04:17 Strategies for Giving Positive Feedback04:51 Praising Effort Over Outcome07:18 Naming Invisible Skills09:37 Using Descriptive Feedback12:20 Catching Small Moments14:43 Separating Behavior from Identity18:59 Reflecting Strengths During Hard Moments19:30 Building Positive Feedback into Routines21:23 Recap and Final Thoughts Get the Questions for Self-Reflection: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/reflectionJoin the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Samantha and Lauren discuss the negative impact of constant corrective feedback and emphasize the importance of recognizing children's efforts rather than just their outcomes.They share personal experiences and research findings that show how neurodivergent kids often receive more negative feedback than their neurotypical peers. They highlight the importance of creating a supportive home environment that counterbalances the critical feedback children might receive from schools and other settings.The episode ends with a promise to provide practical tips on giving meaningful positive feedback in the next discussion. 00:00 Introduction00:39 New Year Resolutions and Positive Feedback02:05 The Impact of Negative Feedback on Neurodivergent Kids05:18 Effort vs. Outcome: Recognizing the Invisible Work06:50 Personal Stories and Examples10:25 The Role of Parents and Positive Reinforcement17:15 Conclusion and Next Week's Topic Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membershipNo, David Book: https://amzn.to/3LjsRzX  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this final episode of the year, Samantha and Lauren discuss the societal pressures of New Year's resolutions and advocate for a more realistic approach, especially for neurodivergent individuals and parents of neurodivergent children.They highlight the overwhelming nature of setting too many goals and emphasize the importance of focusing on one or two manageable objectives at a time to avoid burnout and shame.They also stress the importance of self-compassion and creating a supportive environment for personal growth and effective parenting. 00:00 Introduction00:51 New Year, No Pressure02:30 The Reality of New Year's Resolutions05:18 Understanding Burnout and Stress08:18 Setting Realistic Goals13:24 Reflection and Self-Compassion18:32 Final Thoughts and Community Support Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren talk about the importance of taking a break during the holiday season, particularly for families with neurodivergent members.They discuss the challenges that arise from the busy holiday schedules and emphasize the necessity of rest for mental health and overall well-being.Samantha and Lauren share personal experiences and provide insights on how to manage holiday stress, suggesting that prioritizing rest and downtime can mitigate meltdowns and enhance the holiday experience for both parents and children. They also touch upon the societal expectations to be constantly productive and how this goes against the natural cycles of rest observed in nature. 00:00 Introduction00:36 Hosts' Personal Updates and Reflections01:17 The Importance of Rest During Breaks02:22 Managing Holiday Stress and Expectations06:01 Adapting Family Traditions10:30 The Natural Cycle of Rest and Productivity14:51 Why Downtime is Essential for Neurodivergent Kids16:15 Parents' Need for Downtime and Managing Triggers19:28 Final Thoughts and Community Support Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Anneke (pronounced UH-nuh-kuh) is a coach with a background in both corporate and clinical settings, having worked as a clinical director, supervisor, and behavior analyst. Based in Pittsburgh, PA, she supports clients worldwide through phone and video conferencing. Anneke specializes in coaching professionals with ADHD, autism, and related neurodivergent experiences. She brings personal insight to her practice, as she has been diagnosed with ADHD, depression, anxiety, and PTSD. Website: www.Anneke-Elmhirst.comInstagram: www.instagram.com/allforlovecoaching Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren discuss strategies for effectively parenting children with Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA). They emphasize the importance of collaboration over direct demands to help children feel more in control and safe, which mitigates reactive behaviors.They explain how giving children choices and involving them in decision-making can prevent the activation of their parasympathetic nervous system, which is linked to anxiety and defensive behaviors.Practical examples like offering options instead of direct commands are given and the importance of flexibility and patience in parenting, particularly for neurodivergent families is discussed.Samantha and Lauren also highlight the significance of co-regulation and maintaining a calm demeanor to support a child's sense of autonomy and safety.A PDA cheat sheet with useful scripts and strategies is available for listeners. 00:00 Introduction00:39 Understanding Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)03:00 Collaborative Parenting Strategies06:08 Practical Examples and Scripts09:37 Managing Parental Expectations and Flexibility21:30 Maintaining a Regulated Nervous System24:30 Conclusion and Resources Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membershipGet the PDA Cheat Sheet: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/pda-cheat-sheet  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren engage in a compelling conversation with Jessica Frew, the author of 'Shove Your Shoulds,' a pivotal book aimed at helping ambitious women shed societal conditioning and make bold decisions without guilt or fear. Throughout the discussion, Jessica shares insights into the importance of setting personal boundaries, trusting one's intuition, and the role of parents in modeling behavior for their children.Jessica’s teachings are for everyone, particularly those raising neurodivergent children, advocating for a parenting approach free from societal 'shoulds'. She provides real-life examples of navigating difficult relationships, establishing firm boundaries, and making aligned decisions. 00:00 Introduction to Every Brand Is Different Podcast00:39 Meet Jessica Fru: Author and Bold Decision Coach01:36 The Concept of 'Shove Your Shoulds'02:17 Releasing the Shoulds and Trusting Your Gut06:32 Setting Boundaries and Silencing the Noise13:40 Building a Support System20:12 Raising Kids Without Shoulds26:20 Where to Find Jessica Fru and Her Book27:34 Jessica Fru's Fun and Family Life28:30 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Get the book: https://shoveyourshoulds.com/freebookConnect with Jessica: https://www.instagram.com/heyjessicafrew/ Join the Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren discuss autistic burnout, especially prevalent during the holiday season. They explain the difference between stress and burnout, and share personal experiences to illustrate the impact of prolonged masking and sensory overload on neurodivergent children.Samantha and Lauren provide detailed signs of burnout, including increased irritability, emotional outbursts, and physical symptoms, along with practical advice on how to support recovery through reduced demands, predictability, sensory rest, and encouraging autonomy.They emphasize the importance of parental regulation and offer strategies to prevent future burnout, such as prioritizing recovery time, practicing energy accounting, and teaching children to advocate for their needs. 00:00 Introduction00:39 Discussing Autistic Burnout During the Holidays02:58 Understanding Autistic Burnout09:22 Early Warning Signs of Burnout12:10 Common Triggers of Burnout14:59 Supporting Recovery from Burnout20:48 Preventing Future Burnout24:28 Conclusion and Community Support Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren dive talk about of gratitude. They share personal anecdotes and practical strategies for incorporating gratitude into daily life, especially for parents of neurodivergent children.The discussion covers how gratitude can serve as a tool for self-regulation, helping both parents and kids navigate challenging moments by shifting focus from problems to solutions.Additionally, they explore various sensory and creative methods to make gratitude a concrete and engaging practice for children, thereby fostering emotional well-being and resilience. 00:00 Introduction to Every Brain Is Different Podcast00:43 Today's Topic: The Power of Gratitude01:44 Real-Life Example: Halloween Gratitude Story04:21 The Science Behind Gratitude06:14 Practical Gratitude Tips for Parents13:20 Modeling Gratitude for Kids15:17 Sensory and Creative Gratitude Activities21:22 Conclusion and Support Resources Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren talk about the significant role that play has in children's development. They discuss how play is not only about having fun, but it actually changes brain structure and function, aiding in the learning process. They explain that play releases dopamine, helping with motivation, focus, and learning, especially for children with ADHD.Samantha and Lauren highlight the importance of engaging in play to teach social skills, problem-solving, emotional regulation, and cognitive flexibility. They also share personal anecdotes and professional experiences to emphasize the profound impact play has on building trust and connection with children. 00:00 Introduction00:39 The Importance of Play for Adults and Kids02:36 Neuroscience Behind Play04:49 Play and Emotional Regulation06:09 Building Trust and Perspective Through Play10:11 Connecting with Kids Through Play15:35 Effective Therapy Through Play20:15 Practical Tips for Incorporating Play22:49 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren interview Yana Kleyman, a functional medicine health consultant. Yana shares her personal journey from traditional healthcare as a pharmacist to discovering the transformative power of functional medicine.This transition was inspired by her own health crisis at age 33, which led her to explore root cause medicine. Today, Yana is dedicated to helping children with ADHD and other developmental disorders thrive naturally by challenging predetermined futures.Yana and the hosts discuss various approaches to functional medicine, emphasizing the importance of addressing root causes like gut health, genetics, and environmental factors rather than just treating symptoms with medication. 00:00 Introduction00:41 Meet Our Special Guest: Janna Klayman02:08 Yana's Personal Health Journey03:25 Understanding Functional Medicine05:27 The Role of Nutrition and Lifestyle14:35 Practical Tips for Parents20:36 Resources and Final Thoughts26:36 Conclusion and Highlights Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership Connect with Yana: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/atypically.awesomeFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61558184355910YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DrYanaKleymanLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/yana-kleyman-45a76a313/  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren discuss the positive impacts of spending time in nature on mental health. They explore how outdoor activities activate the parasympathetic nervous system, decreasing cortisol levels, lowering heart rates, and improving sensory integration and attention.Using personal anecdotes and scientific explanations, Samantha and Lauren highlight nature's ability to provide a gentle and predictable sensory input conducive to emotional and cognitive rejuvenation. They also discuss practical strategies for encouraging neurodivergent children to spend more time outdoors, emphasizing the importance of making such activities a part of daily routines. 00:00 Introduction00:52 Today's Topic: Touching Grass for Mental Health01:43 Personal Stories and Benefits of Nature04:59 The Neuroscience Behind Nature's Benefits15:37 Practical Outdoor Activities for Kids18:40 Overcoming Barriers to Outdoor Time19:52 Seasonal Outdoor Activities22:04 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Join the Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/podcastScavenger Hunt Cards: https://amzn.to/42Ul4hT  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren talk about Halloween and the sensory challenges that can come with it. They discuss the sensory overload issues related to costumes, decorations, loud noises, and changes in routine.To help parents navigate these challenges, they offer practical advice on practicing with costumes, managing trick-or-treating expectations, and choosing sensory-friendly environments.They also emphasize the importance of understanding that children's behavior is a form of communication and suggest strategies to support children before, during, and after Halloween events to prevent sensory overload and ensure a positive experience for both parents and their kids. 00:00 Introduction01:28 Homeschooling Decision and Mom Burnout04:51 Halloween Sensory Overwhelm11:57 Preparing for Halloween Night16:56 Managing Halloween Night18:12 Post-Halloween Tips and Reflection20:02 Conclusion and Resources Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: The Neurodivergent Parenting Community | Every Brain is DifferentHarkla: Harkla - Special Needs Products for Happier and Healthier Families  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren welcome Jason Heffler, author of 'Tongue Tied'. Jason shares his personal journey of growing up with a stutter and the challenges he faced, including bullying. His book is designed to help children with speech disorders gain confidence and understand that their speech does not define them.Jason discusses the importance of representation in literature and offers valuable tips for parents to support their children, like praising the effort rather than fluency and teaching empathy and resilience.The discussion touches on the power of acknowledgment, as Jason highlights how owning his stutter changed his life and career prospects.He elaborates on cognitive reframing strategies and the use of music as a therapeutic tool, sharing his own experiences as a DJ and writer in the music industry. 00:00 Intro00:41 Meet Jason Heffler: Author and Advocate01:27 Jason's Journey with Stuttering02:48 The Inspiration Behind 'Tongue Tied'04:00 Supporting Children with Speech Impediments09:58 The Power of Music in Overcoming Stuttering12:53 Advice for Parents on Bullying and Empathy15:18 Acknowledging and Embracing Neurodiversity19:35 Resources and Final Thoughts Connect with Samantha: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.comGet the Book: https://amzn.to/478a2H8Connect with Jason: https://rebrand.ly/tonguetied  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren interview Jennifer Celeste Briggs, a mother who shares her transformative experience with the Sunrise program. Jennifer talks about how the program, which she tailored for her daughter, significantly improved her language and social skills.We explore the importance of meeting children where they are, the collaborative effort between parents and professionals, and the impact of patient and targeted interaction on neurodivergent children.Jennifer also talks about her book, "Watching Sarah Rise," which documents their journey and offers recommendations for other parents navigating similar paths. 00:00 Introduction00:39 Meet Jennifer Celeste Briggs!02:18 The Sunrise Program03:50 Therapy Approaches and Parenting Insights05:27 Challenges and Successes in Therapy10:08 Collaborating with Professionals and Schools21:37 Jennifer's Book and Resources for Parents24:46 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Harkla: https://harkla.co/?rfsn=8804907.29f26d5Get the Book here! https://amzn.to/42SAUt7 Connect with Jennifer:Website: https://www.watchingsarahrise.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jennifercelestebriggsauthorInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/jennifercelestebriggsauthor/ Other Resources:Autism Treatment Center of America: https://autismtreatmentcenter.org/Autism Optimism International: https://www.autismoptimisminternational.com/Autistic Logistics Book: https://amzn.to/4gPNBeb  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren discuss the conclusion of their conversation on managing mom's mental load.They provide five practical strategies to help moms regulate stress and manage interruptions, including the one-minute reset, setting interruption boundaries, sensory swaps, a decision diet, and maintaining a daily white space block.Additionally, they discuss the importance of co-regulation and self-care, emphasizing that a well-supported mom is a better-regulated mom, which benefits the entire family. 00:00 Introduction to Every Brain Is Different Podcast00:47 Addressing Autism Causes and Concerns01:37 Mom's Mental Load: Recap and New Strategies02:25 Micro Regulation Techniques04:18 Interruption Boundaries06:20 Sensory Swap and Decision Diet09:31 Daily White Space Block15:47 Weekly Routine and Family Meetings22:13 Homework and Final Thoughts Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren continue their discussion on managing the mental load experienced by moms. They address the difficulties of delegating household responsibilities and provide practical steps to shift tasks to family members or others to alleviate stress.Samantha and Lauren emphasize the importance of accepting different methods of task completion, trusting the process, and providing clear instructions and ownership of tasks.They also offer valuable advice on involving children in household responsibilities in age-appropriate ways, all aimed at reducing burnout and creating a more balanced family dynamic. 00:00 Introduction00:43 Continuing the Conversation on Mental Load00:59 Shifting Responsibilities to Reduce Mental Load01:24 Overcoming Blocks in Delegation04:42 Steps to Effective Delegation16:35 Involving Kids in Household Responsibilities23:27 Scripts for Effective Communication Join the Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren discuss the mental load carried by moms, marking the beginning of a three-week series on the topic. They explore the often-overwhelming responsibilities that mothers juggle daily, from managing household chores to coordinating children's schedules.Samantha and Lauren emphasize the significance of self-care and provide practical advice on managing sensory input, making micro-decisions, and employing positive self-talk methods to alleviate stress and prevent burnout.A structured approach for recognizing and managing different stages of overwhelm is introduced. 00:00 Introduction to Every Brain Is Different Podcast00:43 The Mental Load of Moms01:51 Strategies for Offloading Responsibilities03:44 Understanding the Mental Load of Motherhood08:05 Stages of Overwhelm: Whisper, Talk, Shout13:32 Practical Tips for Managing Overwhelm14:49 Parenting Power Hour Invitation23:52 Daily Check-ins and Reset Strategies27:40 Recommended Self-Care App: Finch29:05 Conclusion and Support Resources Finch App: https://finchcare.com/ Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership  Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent