Second Breaks

What is delight, really? Not just happiness, not quite joy, but something sparkier and more surprising. In this episode, I talk with writer and yoga therapist Alex Lovell, whose essay “Delight: A Radical Invitation” caught me at just the right time. We explore what makes delight feel different from other emotions, how we can (maybe?) invite more of it into our lives, and why it matters, especially when the world feels heavy.This is a conversation about delight, yes — but also about presence, burnout, bittersweet memories, emotional vocabulary, and squirrels. (Really.)ABOUT MY GUEST:Alex Lovell, Ph.D., is a Yoga Therapist, a Political Psychologist, and the Writer of the Substack publication, Life as I See It. Alex helps you reclaim that hidden space so that you can navigate life feeling anchored, renewed, and at peace.IN THIS EPISODE:- The difference between joy, happiness, and delight- Why slowing down might actually start with noticing- Presence as more than just “being in the moment”- Emotional memory and why your body sometimes cries before your brain knows why- The limits of control and the quiet power of choosing where our energy goes- Delight as an act of resistance — and a path back to ourselvesCheck out the full show notes for this episode here: https://loublaser.substack.com/p/236-alex-lovell• • • • •Subscribe to We're All Getting Older — it’s like sitting at the kitchen table with strong coffee and real good questions: https://loublaser.substack.comConnect with Lou Blaser on Substack: https://substack.com/@loublaserConnect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/ Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

Matthew Long, retired Navy officer and writer at Beyond the Bookshelf, joins me in this conversation about planning for a major life change.Too often, we drift into the next thing simply because it’s familiar. In this conversation, Matthew explains how he avoided this drift and planned his post-retirement life after a long career in the Navy. ABOUT MY GUEST:Matthew Long spent 24 years on active duty in the Navy before retiring in 2024. His civilian life is all about being a reader, a writer, and spending a lot of time with his dog, Lola. He resides in Tennessee with Jannette, his wife of 22 years, and their 17-year-old daughter, while their eldest son is off to college.IN THIS EPISODE:- The challenges of transitioning from a structured career to an open-ended future- How Matthew approached his retirement beyond just the financial side- The blueprint process he used to get clear on his next steps- Changes in family dynamics and household roles post-retirement- How Matthew is putting his blueprint into action—and what his next chapter looks likeCheck out the full show notes for this episode here: https://loublaser.substack.com/p/235-matthew-long• • • • •Subscribe to We're All Getting Older, a newsletter about living a vibrant & fulfilling life so we can die happy later: https://loublaser.substack.comConnect with Lou Blaser on Substack: https://substack.com/@loublaserConnect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/ Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

I am joined by Yvonne Marchese, whose boundless energy and fearless approach to trying new things always inspire me. In this lively conversation, Yvonne shares her secrets to staying energized, curious, and playful in midlife (and beyond).ABOUT MY GUEST:Yvonne Marchese is a former actress turned photographer, podcaster, author, age-agitator, and person who encourages us all to live and age playfully. On Instagram, you will often find her posting clips of her rollerskating or doing fun, playful things and just celebrating her midlife. IN THIS EPISODE:- How Yvonne’s “beginner’s mindset” keeps her excited about life- Her leap into photography, roller skating, and even writing a book- Overcoming fear, self-doubt, and the little voice that says, “You can’t”- Why surrounding yourself with inspiring people is a game-changer- And her plans to lean into playfulness in 2025Check out the full show notes for this episode here: https://loublaser.substack.com/p/234-yvonne-marchese• • • • •Subscribe to We're All Getting Older, a newsletter about how to live now so we can die happy later: https://loublaser.substack.comConnect with Lou Blaser on Substack: https://substack.com/@loublaserConnect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/ Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

I’m back! The podcast has been on hiatus since August, which has given me the time to plan the way forward.In this episode, I talk about rocks versus pebbles (you know that story, right?) and how that analogy has helped me define the future of this podcast. I also discuss how the podcast complements We’re All Getting Older (the main publication) and what you can expect from January onward.• • • • •Subscribe to We're All Getting Older, a newsletter about how to live now so we can die happy later: https://loublaser.substack.comConnect with Lou Blaser on Substack: https://substack.com/@loublaserConnect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/ Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

Some things are changing around here, and I wanted to share the thought process, where I'm coming from and what's next for the podcast. Please be sure to subscribe to We're All Getting Older, to hear about future releases. We're All Getting Older is a weekly publication that explores living a fulfilling and meaningful second half of our lives.FOOTNOTESSlowing Down Time------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/Subscribe to We're All Getting Older: https://loublaser.substack.com/Work With Lou Blaser: https://www.loublaser.com/bookacallSupport the Show: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/secondbreaksThank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

This episode is brought to you by We're All Getting Older, a publication and a community for midlifers who want to get better as they get older.I am joined by writing coach and bestselling author Jen Louden. In this episode, we chat about the aspirations many midlife individuals have to write a book. Jen emphasizes the importance of recognizing the desire to write, distinguishing it from the desire to master the craft. We discuss the benefits and challenges of writing groups, finding the right mentors, and the emotional vulnerability of sharing one's work. We also talked about how to find and work with book coaches. Jen offers practical advice for aspiring writers, encouraging them to embrace their creative journey and find joy in the process.GUEST LINKSJen Louden's webpage: https://jenniferlouden.com/Why Bother: Discover The Desire For What's NextJen Louden on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenlouden/Jen Louden on Substack: https://jenniferlouden.substack.com/FOOTNOTESAuthor Accelerator: https://www.authoraccelerator.com/matchmeCaroline Knapp memoirs: https://amzn.to/4fqtt0P and https://amzn.to/4frxmCYTara Westover memoir: https://amzn.to/3WoBStb------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/Subscribe to We're All Getting Older: https://loublaser.substack.com/Work With Lou Blaser: https://www.loublaser.com/bookacallSupport the Show: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/secondbreaksThank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

This episode is brought to you by We're All Getting Older, a publication and community for midlifers who want to get better as they get older.Grief is a universal experience, yet it is deeply personal and unique to each individual. In this episode, I continue the conversation about grief and explore the relationship and connection between grieving and liminal spaces, how our behavior about liminality applies to grieving, and the "tasks to be done" during this particular — often painful — liminal period.  Find the essay version of this episode on We're All Getting Older: https://loublaser.substack.com/FOOTNOTESEp 229: Can we talk about grief? With Charlene LamEp 226: The Purpose of Liminal Spaces------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/Subscribe to We're All Getting Older: https://loublaser.substack.com/Work With Lou Blaser: https://www.loublaser.com/bookacallSupport the Show: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/secondbreaksThank you. Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

This episode is brought to you by We're All Getting Older, a publication and a community for midlifers who want to get better as they get older.I am joined by Charlene Lam, grief coach, speaker, and founder of the Grief Gallery.This is a wide-ranging conversation about "processing" our grief after the death of a loved one. We talked about the common feelings that show up during the grieving process, like guilt and regret. We discussed the topic of "moving on," what that even means, and how to differentiate between "normal grieving",  situations when you may need help, and the spectrum of care. Charlene also shared her unique approach to dealing with the belongings of our loved ones and how to reclaim the narrative and the stories we would like to remember and tell about them. GUEST LINKSCharlene Lam's website: https://www.charlenelam.com/Charlene Lam on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/curating_grief/FOOTNOTESThe Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/Subscribe to We're All Getting Older: https://loublaser.substack.com/Work With Lou Blaser: https://www.loublaser.com/bookacallSupport the Show: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/secondbreaksThank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

This episode is brought to you by We're All Getting Older, a publication and a community for midlifers who want to get better as they get older.As a follow-up to the previous episode with Yvonne Marchese (Ep 228: Can we slow down time?), I'm sharing further thoughts about time — why it feels like it's moving too fast, where this sense of time urgency comes from, and the three areas that I'm going to address in an attempt to "slow down time". FOOTNOTESEp 228: Can we slow down time? A conversation with Yvonne Marchese------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/Subscribe to We're All Getting Older: https://loublaser.substack.com/Work With Lou Blaser: https://www.loublaser.com/bookacallSupport the Show: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/secondbreaksThank you. Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

This episode is brought to you by We're All Getting Older, a publication and a community for midlifers who want to get better as they get older.Do you feel like time's rushing by so fast? Do you wish you could slow it down, just a bit, so you can enjoy the days or even just catch your breath?In this episode, my good friend and author of In Full Bloom, Yvonne Marchese, joins me to explore how we can slow down time — if that's even possible, given our busy lives. Both Yvonne and I have done a great job culling out our activities, carefully and deliberately choosing what we put on our plates. So, we're exploring how we can pause more and enjoy these things that we've chosen to put on our plates! Neither Yvonne nor I have THE answers, but we definitely came up with a handful to try and incorporate into our day-to-day. GUEST LINKS:In Full Bloom: A Guide To Aging PlayfulyYvonne Marchese's Late Bloomer Living PodcastFollow Yvonne Marchese on Instagram------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/loublaser/Subscribe to We're All Getting Older: https://loublaser.substack.com/Work With Lou Blaser: https://www.loublaser.com/bookacallSupport the Show: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/secondbreaksThank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

This episode is brought to you by We're All Getting Older, a publication and a community for midlifers who want to get better as they get older. In this episode, we discuss the concept of midlife portals and the importance of liminal spaces during life transitions. Inspired by Jen Berlingo's book "Midlife Emergence," I explore the metaphor of doorways marking the passage into new life phases, particularly focusing on significant transitional periods. I share reflections from my personal journey when I left my corporate life and the lessons I learned about the value of liminal spaces. IN THIS EPISODEMidlife portals and the significance of the liminal space in life transitionsIntentionality and purpose behind approaching life transitionsChallenges and opportunities of liminal spacesMy lessons learned about the value of liminal spacesThe "jobs-to-be-done" in the liminal spaceFOOTNOTESMidlife Emergence, by Jen BerlingoEp 225: Finding Our Way Through Major Life Transitions with Jen Berlingo------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to We're All Getting Older, a weekly newsletter about growth in the second half of our lives.Work with Lou Blaser Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

I'm joined by Jen Berlingo, author of Midlife Emergence, to discuss the transformative journey of midlife. We explore the concept of emergence as a positive reframe of the midlife crisis, emphasizing the opportunity to unveil one's authentic self. Jen discusses the second individuation process, the challenges of embracing change while managing life's responsibilities, and the importance of authenticity. Our conversation reveals the complexities of midlife changes, the struggle with societal expectations, and the courage to pursue personal truth and growth.Jen Berlingo, MA, LPC, ATR (she/her) is a coach, a Licensed Professional Counselor, a Nationally Registered Art Therapist, and a master-level Reiki practitioner. After two decades of "midwifing" hundreds of women through life’s major transitions and experiencing her own passage through a fiery midlife portal where she more fully stepped into her queer identity, she was inspired to write Midlife Emergence to accompany other women in traversing their midlife journeys. Upon its publication, Midlife Emergence reached #1 in several Amazon categories, including midlife management, divorce, LGBTQ+ memoirs, LGBTQ+ parenting and families, adulthood and aging, and self-help. GUEST LINKS:Jen Berlingo's websiteJen's Substack: PrismJen's book: Midlife Emergence------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to We're All Getting Older, a weekly newsletter about growth in the second half of our lives.Work with Lou Blaser Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

"A lot of people get old because they think they're supposed to."Former award-winning television journalist and Emmy-Award-winning producer/writer/director Paul Long shares his midlife career transitions and his "new way forward" — one that is ideal for him, that takes advantage of the new realities of longevity and the new phase of life he calls "olderhood." In this episode, Paul and I have a wide-ranging conversation about what it means to get older today, what "olderhood" means (and why he considers this a better moniker for this phase in life), retirement, and the stories we tell ourselves as we get older.   GUEST LINKS:Paul Long's Newsletter: Launch YourselfPaul Long on YouTubeFollow Paul Long on LinkedIn------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to We're All Getting Older, a weekly newsletter about growth in the second half of our lives.Work with Lou BlaserSupport the Show. Thank you. Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

How do you prepare to leave a job or career that you love? Merle Saferstein is an educator, speaker, author, and a pioneer in legacy journaling. After twenty-six years as a Holocaust educator, where she worked with hundreds of Holocaust survivors, helping them to leave their legacy, she retired and created Living and Leaving Your Legacy®.In this episode, we talk about her previous role at the Holocaust Center, how she prepared to retire from a job that meant so much to her, and the questions she asked herself then.  GUEST LINKSMerle Saferstein's websiteLiving and Leaving My Legacy (Volumes 1 and 2) by Merle SafersteinFOOTNOTESEp. 214: Living Our Legacy with Merle Saferstein------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to We're All Getting Older, a weekly newsletter about growth in the second half of our lives.Work with Lou BlaserSupport the Show. Thank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

Vivek Chakrabortty, CEO and Founder of The Kavi Group, a crisis management and business continuity consulting firm, "worked on himself" for years, combining influences from Catholicism, Stoicism, Vedanta, Buddhism, and mindfulness, to come up with his own 3-step philosophy for managing and mastering himself.In this episode, he walks us through each step, and we explore various practical applications in our day-to-day lives. This is a mini-masterclass on managing ourselves. Sit back and grab a notepad. GUEST LINKS:Vivek on LinkedInThe Kavi GroupFOOTNOTESA Case Study in Personal Growth and Transformation with Vivek ChakraborttyThe Untethered Soul by Michael Singer------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to We're All Getting Older, a weekly newsletter about growth in the second half of our lives.Work with Lou BlaserSupport the Show. Thank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

A quick episode to share some big news in my world and riff on the topic of change — whether or not we actually hate change. (Spoiler alert: I don't think we do, actually.)FOOTNOTESWe're All Getting Older (and why I'm changing names)Hop on the WAGO wagon------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to We're All Getting Older, a weekly newsletter about growth in the second half of our lives.Work with Lou BlaserSupport the Show. Thank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

Do we stop being ambitious as we get older? What happens to the drive we've always had once we retire? In this episode of Second Breaks, I explore ambition with Kathy Oneto, the founder of Sustainable Ambition and host of The Sustainable Ambition podcast.  Kathy shares the results of her research and insights from numerous interviews on this topic. We explore the concept of maintaining ambition over time without self-sacrifice, the negative connotations of ambition, societal pressures, and the trap of ambition comparison. We talked about the application of ambition beyond a career and the shift from external to internal motivation. Kathy also shares her personal connection to the topic and insights from her upcoming book, offering advice for those transitioning careers or nearing retirement. The episode highlights the need for intentionality in ambition and finding joy in life's small moments.ABOUT MY GUESTKathy Oneto is a strategy executive and life-work coach who is passionate about helping people succeed on their terms at work and in life. Kathy champions being consciously ambitious and crafting fulfilling work from decade to decade without sacrificing your life or yourself.IN THIS EPISODE:Evolution of ambitionPerception of ambition and societal attitudes towards itUnhealthy striving and its impactBroader scope of ambition beyond career goalsAmbition in midlife and beyondStrategies for sustaining our drive and ambitionFOOTNOTESKathy Oneto's websiteThe Sustainable Ambition PodcastFollow Kathy Oneto on LinkedInBecoming by Michelle ObamaHow Yo-Yo Ma Sustains His Creative Energy (WorkLife with Adam Grant)------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to Midlife Cues, a weekly newsletter about intentional living and personal growth in midlife.Work with Lou BlaserSupport the Show. Thank you. Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

In this podcast episode, I am joined by Dr. Kathy Zhang, a physician specializing in hospice and palliative care. I follow Kathy on LinkedIn, where she regularly posts wisdom that she's gained from speaking with thousands of people in the last moments of their lives. One specific post caught my attention, and I thought the points she shared were brilliant reminders for us about what truly matters. The episode delves into the impact of fear on life choices, the illusion of abundant time, and the need to prioritize personal life alongside work. We also touch on the transient nature of material possessions, the unpredictability of life, and the importance of holistic wellness.You're going to want to listen to this a few times. 😉ABOUT MY GUESTDr. Luyi Kathy Zhang is a certified life coach and hypnotist, hospice/palliative care doctor, and host of The Purpose Filter podcast, the show that shares deathbed wisdom and actionable shortcuts to live a full life. Her mission is to share the lessons of the dying to help us focus on what’s truly important so we can create better, happier, and more meaningful lives while we still have time to enjoy them.IN THIS EPISODECommon regrets of the dyingRole of fear in regretsConcept of time in setting priorities and goalsVenting vs RuminatingPrioritizing holistic well-being for a fulfilling lifeFOOTNOTESDr. Kathy Zhang's websiteFollow Kathy on LinkedInThe Top Five Regrets of the Dying by Bronnie WareHow Our Definitions of Success Change as We Get Older------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to Midlife Cues, a weekly newsletter about intentional living and personal growth in midlife.Work with Lou BlaserSupport the Show. Thank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

Happy New Year, my dear listener friend!I'm more excited than ever to tackle my life and work goals this year. 2023 ended up being about clarifying direction and intentions — although I didn’t know that back in January 2023! As I welcome 2024, I can feel the difference. I have a better understanding of where I want to move toward and a clearer path forward.In this episode, I share my goals and plans for 2024. These are grouped in the following buckets:Health and Well-BeingWork, Impact, and RelevanceGrowth and LearningRelationshipsPlease leave a comment here if you’d like to share your goals, or if you have a question, and let’s keep each other accountable this year. FOOTNOTESMy Key Takeaways and Lessons Learned From 2023------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to Midlife Cues, a weekly newsletter about intentional living and personal growth in midlife.Work with Lou BlaserSupport the Show. Thank you! Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe

For the last three years, I've been capturing key takeaways from the year that's about to end. I only regret not starting this practice earlier; it's a powerful way to gain wisdom from our experiences.So, as we wrap up 2023, I'm excited to share with you some personal insights and lessons I've gathered this year.I would love to hear about your key takeaways from 2023. You can leave a comment here. IN THIS EPISODEImportance of reflecting on experiences to gain wisdomFour takeaways from the past yearMy decision about my careerFOOTNOTESEp 201: Gratitude During Periods of Uncertainty with Holly Bertone21 Questions I Ask at Year-end------------Connect with Lou Blaser on LinkedInSubscribe to Midlife Cues, a weekly newsletter about intentional living and personal growth in midlife.Work with Lou BlaserSupport the Show. Thank you. Get full access to We're All Getting Older at loublaser.substack.com/subscribe