Cleave: The Podcast

What happens when faith—meant to heal, guide, and liberate—is used to control, silence, or shame?In this episode, we dive into the often misunderstood topic of spiritual abuse and spiritual manipulation. We talk honestly about how gospel principles can be misapplied in families, churches, marriages, and faith communities—sometimes unintentionally, sometimes generationally—and the emotional and spiritual toll that can take.This conversation isn’t about blaming or attacking people of faith. It’s about naming patterns that stop growth, distort truth, and disconnect us from our own agency—and from God. We explore how misuse of concepts like honor thy parents, turn the other cheek, and self-sacrifice can lead to anxiety, depression, resentment, and loss of self.We also discuss how to recognize the difference between Christlike love and control, why boundaries are not unfaithful, and how learning to listen to your own inner compass can actually bring you closer to the Savior—not farther away.This episode is for anyone who has felt confused, conflicted, or trapped in the name of “doing the right thing.” Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and know you’re not alone in the process of healing.If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠⁠ for more. Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

Welcome to Cleave — formerly The Living in Truth Project Podcast.In this reboot episode, Jon and Ashley introduce what Cleave is all about: honest, long-form conversations on marriage, family dynamics, boundaries, healing, faith, and emotional health.We share the story behind the name Cleave — what it means to leave what’s unhealthy and cleave to what’s true — and what you can expect from this new season, including topics like forgiveness, spiritual manipulation, triangulation, grief, and rebuilding your identity.If you’re trying to break cycles, strengthen your marriage, and build a healthier life with clarity and truth… you’re in the right place.🎧 New episodes weekly💬 Send us your questions — future episodes may be Q&A styleIf these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠ for more. Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

Understanding Epigenetics and Generational Trauma Through LDS Doctrine In today’s world, the intersection of religious beliefs and modern science offers profound insights into our understanding of human behavior and healing. This episode explores how trauma can be passed down through generations, the role of angels and ancestors in healing, and how LDS teachings can help us break these cycles and live in truth. The Science of Epigenetics Epigenetics examines how our behaviors and environment can cause changes in gene expression without altering the DNA sequence. These changes, though reversible, can be passed down through generations, influencing stress responses and mental health. Dr. Rachel Yehuda's research on Holocaust survivors and their descendants shows that trauma experienced by parents can affect their children's stress responses. Generational Trauma and Its Impact Generational trauma refers to the transmission of trauma's effects across generations. Research indicates that children of parents who experienced significant trauma are more likely to develop PTSD, anxiety, and depression. Dr. Gabor Maté explains that generational trauma affects both psychological symptoms and chronic physical illnesses, emphasizing the need to address these inherited struggles compassionately. LDS Doctrine on Generational Sin Scriptures such as Deuteronomy 5:9-10 and Doctrine and Covenants 98:47 highlight the generational impact of sin and behavior. These teachings align with epigenetic findings, suggesting that our actions affect future generations. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland emphasizes compassion and understanding towards human frailty, crucial for breaking negative cycles and promoting healing. The Role of Angels and Ancestors LDS doctrine teaches that ancestors and angels play an active role in our lives, assisting in healing family lines and breaking generational cycles. Temple work, including baptisms for the dead, connects the living with their ancestors, fostering mutual growth and healing. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland and Doctrine and Covenants 128:15 highlight the vital connection between generations, reinforcing the importance of family history work. The Power of the Temple Endowment The temple endowment provides spiritual blessings and insights, offering protection and strength against generational trauma. President Russell M. Nelson and Brigham Young emphasize the endowment's role in equipping individuals with the spiritual tools necessary for daily resilience. Breaking the Cycle Understanding family history and patterns is the first step in breaking generational trauma. Therapy, mindfulness, and spiritual practices like prayer offer tools for healing. Setting boundaries and seeking supportive communities are crucial for escaping toxic environments. Oprah Winfrey's insights on trauma emphasize transforming past experiences into sources of strength and resilience. Living in Truth Embracing both positive and negative aspects of our family history is essential for living in truth. Integrating LDS teachings with modern psychology provides a holistic approach to overcoming generational trauma. Doctrine and Covenants 121:45 and Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf's teachings encourage love, virtue, and perseverance in breaking negative cycles and promoting healing. Conclusion The past shapes us, but it doesn't define us. By understanding our history and seeking truth, we can create a brighter future for ourselves and future generations. The study of epigenetics and generational trauma, combined with LDS teachings, offers profound insights into our ability to heal and transform. With the support of our ancestors and heavenly beings, we can break negative cycles and live in truth, creating a legacy of healing and righteousness for future generations. Tune in to explore the intersection of epigenetics and LDS doctrine, and discover practical steps for breaking generational cycles and living a life of truth and healing.

In Episode 10 of the "Living and Truth Project" podcast, hosts Jon Lefrandt and Ashley Lefrandt recap the Saturday afternoon session of a recent general conference, focusing on powerful messages from Elder Garrett W. Gong, Brother Michael T. Nelson, and Elder Quinton L. Cook. The discussions revolve around key themes of personal trials, spiritual growth, and the profound impacts of Christ's atonement. Elder Gong’s talk, "All Things for Our Good," emphasizes how, despite living in a fallen world filled with trials and tribulations, all experiences can ultimately work for our good as we rely on Jesus Christ and His atonement. This message resonates with personal anecdotes shared by the hosts, reflecting on past hardships and the unexpected ways these experiences have fostered growth and provided opportunities to help others. Brother Nelson's address, "In Support of the Rising Generation," offers insights into empowering youth within the church and at home, advocating for giving them leadership opportunities and fostering their personal relationship with Christ. Lastly, Elder Cook’s discussion, "The One with Christ," highlights the importance of unity and oneness in Christ, illustrating how this principle is essential in overcoming worldly divisions and enhancing communal and individual spiritual journeys. Overall, the episode delves into how faith, trials, and service interconnect to enrich our lives and the lives of those around us, urging listeners to embrace challenges with faith and to support one another in spiritual growth. Connect with us on instagram @the_lit_project ! We would love to hear your thoughts on this episode! And if you like the work that we are doing, please like, comment, and share this episode with those you love. We also appreciate if you can Subscribe to our youtube channel! Thank you for your support and for your commitment to live in truth!

Episode 9: "Deepening Faith and Understanding in the Afternoon Session" In this engaging episode of "The Living Truth Project" podcast, hosts Jon Lefrandt and Ashley Lefrandt delve into the profound spiritual insights from four pivotal talks delivered during the Saturday afternoon session of the recent General Conference held in April 2024 by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. They provide a detailed exploration of each talk, emphasizing the recurring themes of faith, agency, and the sustaining power of Jesus Christ. 1. Elder David A. Bednar's Address: "Be Still and Know That I am God" Elder Bednar's discourse centers on finding peace and certainty in God's presence. The Lefrandts discuss how the repetition of key phrases in the talk underscores the importance of recognizing our relationship with God and Jesus Christ. They share personal reflections and experiences, highlighting how moments of stillness allow for deeper spiritual connections and insights. 2. Elder Massimo De Feo's Talk: "Rise, He Called Us" Focusing on overcoming personal trials and recognizing Jesus Christ as the Messiah, this talk resonated deeply with the Lefrandts. They recount Elder De Feo's emphasis on spiritual sight, which enables individuals to recognize truth despite physical or metaphorical blindness. They discuss their own experiences of gaining clarity and strength through their faith. 3. Elder Brent H. Nielsen's Address: "A Record of What I Have Both Seen and Heard" Elder Nielsen's talk celebrates the growth and vitality of the Church and its global membership. The Lefrandts reflect on the exponential increase in temples and the spread of the Church's influence, sharing their optimism and personal testimonies of the blessings associated with active and faithful church membership. 4. Elder Jose L. Alonzo's Discourse: "Jesus Christ at the Center of Our Lives" Jon and Ashley explore Elder Alonzo's focus on the central role of Jesus Christ in addressing life's most challenging questions and moments. They share personal stories of how embracing Christ's love and teachings has provided them with comfort and guidance during their most difficult times. Throughout the episode, Jon and Ashley weave their personal experiences and insights with the teachings from the talks, creating a compelling narrative that underscores the transformative power of living a Christ-centered life. They conclude with a heartfelt invitation to their listeners to revisit the talks and continue seeking spiritual growth through scripture and prayer.

In Episode 8, the hosts Jon Lefrandt and Ashley Lefrandt continue their engaging discussion on the recent General Conference from the Church of Jesus Christ, focusing on three impactful talks from the Saturday morning session. They delve into Elder Ulysses S. Soares talk on "Covenant Confidence," emphasizing the importance of temple worship in strengthening our connection with Jesus Christ and enhancing our spiritual resilience in a turbulent world. The episode also covers Elder Gerard's insights on "Integrity: A Christlike Attribute" highlighting how living with integrity not only strengthens personal faith but also influences and uplifts others. The hosts reflect on their personal challenges and growth, underscoring the necessity of aligning actions with beliefs to foster genuine relationships and community trust. And they finish the episode with President Eyring's discussion on temple covenants, with a powerful reminder of the peace and guidance available through regular temple attendance. The hosts share personal anecdotes that resonate with the messages from the talks, illustrating the real-world application of these spiritual principles. Throughout the episode, the hosts incorporate listener feedback and social media interactions, enriching the discussion with community insights and making the session relatable and grounded in everyday experiences.

In this episode, hosts Jon Lefrandt and Ashley Lefrandt discuss their personal experiences and insights from the first session of the April 2024 General Conference. They delve into Elder Holland's impactful talk, emphasizing his messages on covenant relationships and the importance of maintaining faith in challenging times. Elder Holland's recent personal struggles, including the loss of his wife and his own health battles, bring a poignant and human touch to his teachings on the resilience of faith and the urgency of living the gospel. The episode also explores Sister Dennis's discourse on the symbolic significance of temple garments in daily spiritual life, discussing how these garments act as a constant reminder of the covenant with God and the protective power of the Atonement. The hosts share personal anecdotes to illustrate how wearing the garment has influenced their spiritual journey and underscored the importance of daily reminders of one's faith. Additionally, Elder Dushku's talk about the impact of Joseph Smith's First Vision is covered, with a focus on how regular, small spiritual experiences can collectively strengthen one's testimony without the necessity of miraculous events. This episode encourages listeners to find the divine in the everyday and to appreciate the steady stream of spiritual communications that shape our faith and testimonies, urging an active engagement with the teachings of the gospel to face contemporary challenges.

In the episode titled "Christlike Boundaries" hosts Jon Lefrandt and Ashley Lefrandt (from @the_lit_project on instagram) lead a discussion that is centered around the importance of setting healthy boundaries, particularly within personal relationships and for self-growth. This episode features our awesome guest, Rachel Wood (@lifecoachrachel). Rachel has a passion for psychology and human development and behavior which is helpful as she learns through life as a mother 7 children; two adopted kids and five step kids. Rachel is a life coach for people dealing with difficult relationships and is currently in graduate school for mental health counseling to become a therapist. In this episode, she shares insights into her journey, including her transition into a life coach role following her divorce, and emphasizes the significance of boundaries in achieving self-understanding and improvement. The conversation explores the definition of boundaries, their necessity for teaching others how to treat us, and the distinction between boundaries and control. Through examples, such as personal anecdotes and scriptural references, the hosts and guest illustrate how boundaries are a sign of self-respect and an essential tool for healthy relationships. They debunk common misconceptions that boundaries are selfish or unkind, highlighting instead that true love and Christ-like behavior inherently involve boundaries. Moreover, the episode delves into the challenges of establishing and maintaining boundaries, including dealing with resistance from others and confronting internal fears of rejection or conflict. The guest and hosts discuss the role of personal revelation, therapy, and supportive relationships in overcoming these challenges and the transformative power of setting boundaries on personal well-being and relational dynamics. The discussion is grounded in a deep respect for spiritual principles, with references to scriptural stories and teachings that underscore the divine endorsement of boundaries. The episode concludes with an encouragement for listeners to reflect on their own lives, identify areas where boundaries may be lacking or violated, and take steps toward implementing them as a means of healing and growth. "Christlike Boundaries" offers a comprehensive, insightful, and spiritually informed perspective on the importance of boundaries, providing listeners with practical advice, encouragement, and a clear call to action for personal development and healthier relationships.

This episode of the podcast, titled "Beware of Pride," explores the concept of pride and its impact on personal growth and relationships. Living in Truth Project Podcast hosts, Jon Lefrandt and Ashley Lefrandt, discuss their personal experiences and insights into how pride manifests in various forms, including looking down on others and self-centeredness. They delve into the importance of humility, the dangers of pride in both spiritual and psychological contexts, and how pride can hinder one’s ability to learn, grow, and connect with others and God. The discussion includes references to scriptural teachings, the psychology of human behavior, and personal anecdotes to illustrate how pride can be a barrier to progress and happiness. The Lefrandts encourage listeners to reflect on their own lives, be open to learning, and work on identifying and overcoming pride to improve their relationships and personal growth. Join the discussion and LIT community on instagram at @the_lit_project !

Episode Three Summary: "The Blessings of Making and Keeping Covenants" features a deep and inspiring conversation between Jon and Ashley Lefrandt about the significance of keeping covenants with God. Inspired by Come Follow Me's scripture reading found in 2 Nephi 10-19, they explore the idea that covenants are not burdens but blessings that provide protection, power, and peace. They discuss how making and maintaining covenants impacts one's relationship with God, offering an extra measure of love, mercy, and opportunities for personal growth and repentance. Through personal anecdotes, scriptural insights, and teachings from religious leaders, they emphasize the joy and fulfillment found in living a covenant-keeping life. They also address the challenges and misunderstandings associated with covenants, aiming to clarify their true purpose and the blessings they bring. Introduction: Jon and Ashley express gratitude for the support they've received and mention the importance of their podcast as highlighted by conversations at a recent dinner with various generations. They emphasize the value of diverse perspectives, especially in the context of the "Come Follow Me" program and other podcasts they admire. Theme of Covenants:The focus of the episode is on understanding and applying covenants in daily life, not as a deep doctrinal discussion but as applicable insights for living in truth. Baptismal Covenants and Challenges:They discuss baptismal covenants and the commitments involved, such as joining the church, taking upon the name of Jesus Christ, serving God, and supporting others. They highlight the challenges and joys of living these covenants. Personal Insights and Experiences: Ashley shares a personal experience where she was prompted to lean into her covenants during a difficult decision involving Jon, which led to a positive outcome. Scriptural Insights:They explore scriptures from the Book of Mormon, particularly teachings from Jacob about the delight in proving the truth of Christ's coming and the importance of covenants. The Role of Covenants in Trials: The discussion moves to the protective power of covenants in times of distress and how Satan tries to obscure the truth, creating confusion and discouragement. Temple Covenants: Jon shares a transformative experience in the temple where he felt the power and mercy of God, helping him through a period of mourning after his father's death. Covenants as a Restoration Tool: They emphasize the restorative power of covenants, both for individuals and for God's people, reflecting on the ongoing Restoration of the Gospel and the gathering of Israel. Closing Thoughts: Jon and Ashley encourage listeners to seek truth and allow covenants to free them from the burdens of life. They invite listeners to engage in a continued dialogue on the topic through social media and in their personal lives.The podcast serves as a heartfelt discussion aimed at inspiring listeners to reflect on their spiritual commitments, the healing power of covenants, and the continuous effort to align with God's will and truth.

In this episode Jon and Ashley Lefrandt introduce the concept of the podcast and share some experiences in their life where they have learned how to Live in Truth and how it has deeply blessed their lives. 🎙️Welcome to the Living in Truth Project PODCAST! 🎙️ A space where faith meets life, and where we journey together through the truths of our time. I’m Jon Lefrandt, joined by my co-host and wife Ashley, and we’re here to explore the depths of our faith, uplift your spirit, and provide you with meaningful insights into everyday challenges. 🎙️ Today, like every day, we’re diving deep into the teachings of Jesus Christ and the wisdom of modern psychology. Whether you’re a devoted member of the Church, someone who’s questioning, or simply on a quest for understanding, this is the place for you. 🎙️ Expect heartfelt discussions, thought-provoking topics, and a community that’s ready to explore the great and important things of life and faith. So, wherever you are, whatever your journey, join us as we discover how these timeless truths can illuminate our paths and enrich our lives. 🎙️ Get ready to be inspired, enlightened, and embraced by a community of believers and seekers alike. This is the LIVING IN TRUTH PODCAST. Let’s start living... TODAY! 🎙️

Hello! I'm Jon Lefrandt. Husband to Ashley :) While Ashley is the brainchild for this project, I have been tasked to set up the podcast, the website, the social media channels etc. She is away at a cheer competition in Las Vegas with our daughter and I popped in for a few minutes to softly introduce what our mission is. There will be more coming... We hope you will follow along for more!

Forgiveness is one of the most misunderstood teachings in faith communities — and for many people, that misunderstanding has caused more harm than healing.In this Here’s the Lesson episode, we explore why forgiveness has so often been taught as immediate reconciliation, emotional closure, or spiritual maturity — and how that definition leaves survivors feeling confused, ashamed, and unsafe.If your body still reacts, if setting boundaries feels necessary, or if forgiveness feels impossible right now, this episode offers clarity without condemnation.We talk about:The difference between forgiveness and reconciliationWhy forgiveness is an internal process, not restored accessHow faith can be used to heal rather than controlWhy Jesus forgave freely and still set boundariesHow honoring what’s still healing can be an act of wisdom, not failureThis episode is for anyone navigating:spiritual abuse, emotional manipulation, family systems, boundaries, faith and healing, or the pressure to “forgive and move on” before it’s safe.Forgiveness can free you.Boundaries can protect you.You don’t have to choose one or the other.Note: If this episode resonates with you, we would love for you to follow our podcast, give us a rating, or follow us on social media so we can keep the dialogue going. Regardless of whether you do those things or not... know that we are grateful you are here with us. Hope you will join us again soon.

What happens when kindness comes with expectations?In this mini episode of Here’s the Lesson, we explore how giving—especially in families—can quietly turn into obligation, control, or resentment when it’s tied to unspoken expectations.This conversation isn’t about blame.It’s about honesty, boundaries, and learning the difference between love that’s freely given and love that’s conditional.If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠Click here⁠ for more. Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

“Don’t judge” is one of the most quoted — and most misunderstood — phrases in Christian culture.In this Here’s the Lesson mini episode, we unpack what Jesus actually taught about judgment, discernment, and accountability. Christ never asked us to abandon truth in the name of love. He warned against hypocrisy — not righteous judgment.We explore the difference between condemning people and discerning fruit, why “don’t judge” is often used to deflect accountability, and how truth spoken with humility is not unchristian — it’s loving.Here’s the lesson:Discernment isn’t judgment.Avoidance is.Take what’s good. Leave the rest.If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. Click here for more.

What did Jesus actually mean when He said, “turn the other cheek”?For many, this teaching has been misunderstood—and misused—to encourage silence, endurance, and even compliance in the face of harm. In this episode of Here’s the Lesson, we slow down and place Christ’s words back into their original context.This conversation explores the difference between refusing retaliation and refusing safety, how scripture can be weaponized to protect abuse, and why Jesus consistently modeled both love and wisdom.Boundaries are not a lack of faith.Peace is not passivity.And Christ never asks us to endure abuse to prove our righteousness.If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠Click here⁠ for more.

This isn’t a full episode — just a short reflection.In this Here’s the Lesson segment from Leave Then Cleave, Jon explores why boundaries are often mislabeled as betrayal, especially in families and faith-based relationships.Boundaries aren’t rejection.They’re clarity.If someone experiences your boundary as abandonment, it may be because they were used to access without accountability.This is a reminder that love doesn’t require self-abandonment — and choosing health is not unchristlike.Take what fits. Leave the rest.If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠ for more. Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

This isn’t a full episode — just a short reflection.In this Here’s the Lesson segment from Leave Then Cleave, Jon explores the difference between peace and avoidance, especially when silence is mistaken for righteousness.Forgiveness was never meant to erase truth.And love was never meant to require self-betrayal.This is a moment for anyone who’s been told that speaking up is unchristlike, that boundaries are prideful, or that naming harm means you lack faith.Take what fits. Leave the rest.If these conversations matter to you, we share a weekly note with deeper reflections on faith, boundaries, and truth. You’re welcome to join us. ⁠⁠Click here⁠⁠ for more. Also, A Favor to Ask: If this episode, or any of our others resonate with you... Please subscribe and rate this podcast! It will help us reach others that need this message too!

Wicked is not the story we all thought it was.In this episode of Cleave, I break down the emotional and psychological layers inside one of Broadway’s biggest hits — and why its message hits differently as an adult.We talk:• the Wizard’s manipulation• Glinda’s toxic charm• the recipe for creating a scapegoat• the cost of choosing integrity• and why Elphaba is one of the most important “heroes” we have todayI also share how this story mirrors real patterns my wife and I have lived through — and why so many of us find ourselves cast as villains the moment we stand up to dysfunction.If you’ve ever defied gravity in your own life, you’ll feel seen in this one.

What happens when the ideal of “eternal family” meets the reality of imperfection and grief? In this powerful episode, Jon Lefrandt reflects on the doctrine behind family, partnership, and divine order—through the lens of his own loss, love, and lived experience. A heartfelt look at what it means to cleave to one another, to God, and to the hope that no family is ever truly lost.