What You Do

A Florida teen attacked his mother with a pork chop, plus I give you the top 5 most hated teams in sports. Most everything you need to know about the Super Bowl and Americans are fatter than we have ever been in our history; how great is that? We will all learn what “house hushing” is, plus a man drove his car for several miles, all while his car was literally on fire. Apparently, Armageddon has never been closer, and Chucky Cheese takes a plea deal. What’s a normal thing for most people that secretly freaks you out, and you won’t believe what a kid shoved up his nose. A Florida man had sex with his vacuum cleaner in full view of other people! So, what else is new? Hop aboard.

There was a food fight on an airplane, and shit got ugly. A lady is dating identical twins and they’re living together. Have you burped your home yet? I’ll explain that. We have the top 5 most promiscuous countries, and the US ain’t one of them. How much are SuperBowl tickets, and you’ll be surprised to hear that most of us live in a world of sticky notes. I know I do. In the event that you’re into it, I give you the strongest beer ever. Would you climb inside a remote-controlled rental car? I give you scientific breaking news, cows are learning how to use tools. There’s a rabbit hopping in cars with people just because he wants to, and a coyote swam all the way to Alcatraz… we don’t know why. What’s the dumbest house rule you and your spouse made, plus, what are the top trending hobbies currently? We sample a brand-new Def Leppard song, plus, a woman has been forced by the courts to apologize to her cheating husband and she doesn’t seem pleased. I give you the fun fact of the day. Truth is, you have nothing better to do, so hop on board.

A flock of sheep invade a grocery store looking for acorns, like most of us do, and speaking of critters, squirrels can always find their nuts, and I’ll let that statement speak for itself. A woman was stopped for speeding at 3am and she was completely butt-ass naked, plus, a man tried to rob a grocery store and HE was also completely naked; and those two stories are unrelated. What NFL fans are the drunkest at games, and is drinking wine good for you? Which US states are the most people moving away from, and where are they going? A woman set fire to her boyfriend’s clothes in her fireplace and burned down 13 apartments in the process, which is never good. Working out can become an addiction, and it’s another story of a guy who woke up from surgery speaking perfect Spanish, and he doesn’t speak Spanish. All fun stories of our goofy, yet interesting world.

Expensive weddings aren’t worth it; many of them end in divorce. If you’re going to cheat on your spouse, don’t go to a restaurant where they have surveillance cameras…DUH! A fortune teller couldn’t foresee his own arrest, and space junk is causing us problems in more ways than you know. Your thinking of plastic surgery? Guess where the filler they use comes from? You want to test the strength of your new relationship? Take a week-long trip together; it will show you things you will wish you hadn’t seen. The top 5 careers that will age you, and what is something you slowly stop caring about as you get older? Scrolling on your phone has become a bad habit, and we’ve got ways to help you ease back on that. A real live mermaid is now in jail thank God, and beware of the mail man, but you knew that.

Next time you see a piggy bank at a Goodwill store, buy it! Tara Reid’s claim that someone spiked her drink doesn’t make any sense. Pickleball has taken over America, and I give you the unhappiest workers in the country and where they live. What jobs are harder than most people think, and details on the latest concept is that a college degree simply isn’t worth the money or the time. An 86-year-old man got a ticket for spitting, plus the latest in airlines is they are thinking of putting seats in the wings of the plane, and I’m not kidding. If you steal a car and then abandon it, make sure to get all your shit out of it before you leave it. A man paid crazy money for the Ohtani home run ball, and a guy was sitting in the waiting area to board his plane when he caught on fire. A company was sending out end of the year bonuses when they accidentally sent one employee a check for $87,000 dollars, and the employee refuses to give it back. We share a list of all the items that were pulled out of people’s asses in 2025, which is a great way to END things. See what I did there? We take a look at what the year ahead of us might bring, plus a good round of songs I’m embarrassed to admit that I love, and we take a quick look at wildcard weekend. Don’t judge…I’m old!

Along with the usual Christmas show shenanigans, I also give you the top 5 movies of the year, and Time magazine has chosen the 2025 person of the year, and it’s not me. There’s a new piece of Star Wars memorabilia that sold for a record 3.875 million, and a woman gives birth in a driverless car. How many days should a guest stay in your house during the holidays before the place starts to smell, and we deal with Christmas songs that are controversial. An only fans lady may go to jail for having sex with most anyone in her bang bus, plus TSA announces you will be charged a fine if you don’t have the real ID. There is a new number one name for boys in America, and after this next story, you’ll think twice about ordering food delivered to your home. And we wrap up the year with a story you won’t believe, and it has to do with a woman’s ear. It’s time for me to tickle your mistletoe!

Parents are opting out of taking their kids to see Santa, and what’s up with Tara Reid? A California man discovered that a bear was living under his kitchen, and it wasn’t a rent share situation. I give you the best places to have a white Christmas, and one mother is charging each family member for their Christmas dinner, and I don’t think that announcement landed well. A raccoon now knows what a hangover is all about, and Christmas in New York isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Christmas bonuses are a thing of the past and you never know where your food has been when you order it delivered to your home. These women on only fans will do most anything for their paying customers, including going to jail. It’s so festive in here you can almost feel it, so let’s do it. NO, not that!

We move closer to Christmas with a good December show to get you in the mood. For example, a guy was arrested for showing his naughty bits to oncoming traffic. What are women thinking about while having sex? Turns out it’s not me. I give you a surefire way to improve your dating life, guaranteed! You may have heard, people find snakes in their bedroom quite often, but not one this big. Tips on how to survive traveling with your kids during the holidays, and things not to do while flying during the holidays. Apparently, we’re not supposed to forget the butter when holiday cooking, yet folks are reporting they’re spending much less for the holidays. Have you ever stolen anything from a hotel room? Plus, everything you need to know in order to survive your holiday hangover. Men are drifting away from dating all together, and I’ll tell you why. This may cause you concern because Robo taxies are on the freeways now. Plus, I give you the mother of all scams… literally! I’m inviting you to start your holidays with me, so let’s bring in December together.

Astronauts will soon be eating food made from their own urine, and I’m not kidding. Bob Ross original paintings have sold for big money, and good news if you’re bald, someone thinks they’ve figured it out. Have you tried the Scandinavian sleep method? Me either, but it seems to make sense. Why are there kangaroos in the road, and how did they get there. Have you ever cried at work? You may be surprised how many have. You ever been pissed off at the supermarket? Hopefully you didn’t do what this person did. Elton John threw another bitch fit in front of everybody back stage at a show, and is a forehead kiss the sign of a breakup? A woman was driving 107 mph because she had to get to the pizza place before they closed. It’s hard to believe what a guy will do to get out of going to the mall with his wife, but I support him. Plus, I give you tips on how to survive Thanksgiving. Join us and gobble it up.

It’s not against the law to throw a sandwich at someone, judge said, and some people are spending hours in their shower but experts are saying you shouldn’t do that. We venture into the world of Cool Stories In Music, and what is a rule society follows that makes no sense to you? And allow me to introduce you to the world’s longest married couple. Tom Brady had his long-lost favorite dog cloned by a company that he himself owns. Is that legal? I give you the top eight favorite sandwiches and that should make your day, plus, what’s something you wish your partner would do without you asking them to? Here’s a shocker; cash money is close to coming to an end. The divorce rate is at its all-time lowest and so is getting married. And my favorite, a superior court judge took a piss outside in full view of the public, and that judge is a female! The world can be a beautiful place.

A guy stood up a date so she set his house on fire, and a naked guy ran through Walmart and yes drugs were involved. How odd. Your local movie theater has never been in this bad of shape, and guess which city has the most rats? It ain’t New York. A Florida teacher showed up to class high on cocaine and it got worse from there, plus if you marry on a holiday, your marriage is cursed. Shit got weird at an Illinois McDonalds and gun play was involved, and even worse, a guy willingly paid alimony for his cats, and he was fine with it. A guy was eating a bag of Doritos and the cops were alerted, and that’s not a joke, plus a guy destroyed eighty pumpkins for no reason and yes, it was in Florida. 70-year-old Kelsey Grammer just had his 8th kid with his 4th wife, plus Kim Kardashian thinks the moon landing was a hoax. Cows apparently love jazz music and give more milk and finally, 21 monkeys are on the loose, so beware! Its amazing how shit gets stranger every week. How can that be?

Today, the scary is everywhere! A man threw his own funeral and he wasn’t dead, plus a blind man in Italy received state benefits for 50 years, problem for him is that he wasn’t actually blind. A restaurant in Washington has a strict no phones policy, and people are loving it. Something appears to be up with Britney Spears and it doesn’t seem good. Francis Ford Coppola is broke, as in no money, and AI could soon be assisting NFL refs. Early to bed and early to rise isn’t necessarily a good thing, and as odd as it may sound, people are being warned they shouldn’t lick the toads. Three women were arrested because their underwear had $650,000 worth of gold in them, and Valentine’s Day is not the loneliest day of the year for singles; Halloween is! Today is our Halloween Spooktacular and it’s a complete waste of your time. That I promise.

Cops brought an end to one man’s violence by serving him Dairy Queen, and celebrities are up in arms about a gas station dinosaur. Delivery people are stealing merch left and right, and Americans are feeling really good about marijuana. Nasa is planning to build livable quarters on the moon with material already found up there. What would you do if a workmate hugged you every time they see you? Heidi Klum has boob hair, and proud of it, and a gorilla slammed into a glass viewing wall and cracked it. What TV show never had a bad season, and young and old people are now renting homes together. I give you the latest on Halloween this season, and you’ll be pleasantly surprised how a former stripper is now making a living. Hey, we all have to make a living some way! Hop aboard.

The best man at a wedding was never told he shouldn’t shoot anyone, and be careful of chat GPT; it apparently remembers what you talk about. What’s a skill everybody should learn, and how much do you think you need to retire? You may be shocked. Would you like to skip heavy traffic? Can you say flying taxis? A cow showed up in the median of a busy freeway, and no one can figure out how he got there. People are no longer hooking up for sexy romps, and the reason is a clear sign of the times. The color of your car may be attracting birds to take a dump on it, plus learn how not to decorate your house for Halloween. Scientists have woken something up that’s been sleeping for forty thousand years. That doesn’t seem like the best idea, does it? Plus, an alligator walked into a bar, and yes, it was in Florida. We’re clearly busy today, so let’s get started.

The world’s largest great white shark breezed past swimmers in North Carolina, and a couple decides to divorce because their dog and cat couldn’t get along. I can clearly see that! JK Rowling is pissed off at Emma Watson, and lets her have it on social media, plus a guy was arrested doing 107 mph because he had to get to his barber appointment, which makes complete sense. You want to sell your fingernail clippings? Because China is buying, and I’m all in. Americans are cooling it on college saying it’s a waste of time and money, and Halloween is in trouble because Americans are saying it’s too expensive. I say pick one. And what are the best candies to hand out on Halloween? PETA is calling for a teacher to resign because of what she did to a new born kitten in front of her class, and that one is hard to hear. Florida comes through in a big way with a guy who presents a live alligator in court as his attorney. The crazies are clearly here, and that includes me.

Lots of good crap today. Example; A school administrator stole an ATM machine without his wife’s permission, and a mere skateboard sold at auction for millions. Cool Stories In Music pulls back the layers of Levi Stubbs career, and what would happen if you drove a tiny Barbie car in real traffic while drunk? This dude found out. The five activities that are banned in space, and a wannabe bride does a stupid thing, or did she? Marjorie is the latest hot craze name for your newborn child, and there’s a reason, plus I give you the top 10 one hit wonders. She did something because she thought it was really sweet. He didn’t! An Ohio school teacher was fired because he stole 14 lawnmowers, and you can now purchase the actual house from the Conjuring. Anybody? Push play so the haunting can begin!

A woman sued and won because her work mate kept rolling her eyes at her, and the new iPhone 17 has a bit of a problem. A single Pokémon card just sold for millions, and people are dropping their subscriptions to streaming services in droves. Prenups in marriage are very popular now, and they say the high divorce rate is a myth, and I say bullshit! An arriving plane couldn’t land because the traffic controller had fallen asleep, and what’s something you secretly judge someone for? Thinking about a do-it-yourself home project with your spouse? Don’t! What really stresses out most people at work? Hint, it’s not the job, and how would you like to see commercials on your refrigerator every morning? Why would someone send a package containing a pair of woman’s shoes to an island where only cows lived, and with that in mind; monkeys like to get drunk. Lastly, a car was pulled over and the woman in the car blamed the driving on her husband, but she was the only one in the car. Let’s light this candle!

Ellen DeGeneres is being sued and I’m not sure anyone cares. A guy owed a cruise ship a ton of money from gambling losses, so he jumped ship. Ladies, what did you not know about men until you started living with one? Men are more loyal to their barbers than their wives, and the cost of raising kids is out of control. Some states are taking control of your thermostat, which is scary, and did you know some airline pilots take naps during flights? I’m not kidding, and guess what the number one day of the year on which the most people are born, and there is a good reason for it. The top 5 happiest states in the US and I give you the most expensive Lego set ever put on sale. I share an easy way to get rid of anxiety, and I saved the best for last; she didn’t like her husband so she tried to kill him, twice. How can you not?

Guess what a Florida puppy store hired to attract customers? I give you the latest on Taylor Swift doing the Super Bowl, and are you a part of the foldable phone craze? More songs you’re embarrassed to admit that you love, and out of all generations, guess which one is the unhappiest? A Florida guy got arrested simply because he wanted to smell a woman’s feet, and what are scientists now saying about so-called astrologers? In what part of the country are the unhappiest couples found, and how would you feel if you were woken up in the middle of the night by a four-hundred-pound drunk guy who was completely naked and a stranger to you? And Darth Vader’s original light saber has sold at auction for crazy money. Details on this and more are yours, today, on What You Do!

You’ll never look at a cucumber the same way, and that’s a promise! Apparently, the Cincinnati Bengals are super cheap on every possible level, and would you give your pet to a local zoo to be fed to the lions and tigers? This lady did. I give you the top 3 most stolen cars, and did you know that AOL and its dial up internet still exists? A Florida man threatened a landscaper with a twelve-inch knife while wearing a jester outfit, plus, is there anything you have aged out of? Walmart is doing a great thing for you if you own an EV car, and Americans are sick of tipping. Plus, the butt sniffer is back, so be careful if you live in Burbank. Let’s light this candle.