The Angry Therapist Podcast

Do you find yourself giving more, waiting longer, explaining harder — just to keep love alive? In this episode, John Kim reflects on overgiving, emotional boundaries, and the quiet ways we abandon ourselves in relationships. Recorded in Costa Rica, he uses lessons from surfing to explore why love shouldn’t feel like anxiety, confusion, or constant effort. Inspired by the idea of “Let Them,” this episode offers a necessary reframe: there are some things you simply should not let people do. This is a reminder that protecting your heart isn’t selfish — it’s essential. Host Links: Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You didn’t marry the wrong person — you’re just in a stage of your relationship. In this episode, John Kim sits down with attachment expert Thais Gibson to break down the six stages of a relationship — and why so many couples get stuck thinking something is “wrong” when nothing is actually broken. We talk about: Why attachment styles are not labels, and how they can be rewired The difference between dating, honeymoon, and the power struggle stage Why most couples struggle after the honeymoon — and how to move forward How early conditioning shapes adult relationships What healthy long-term love actually looks like If relationships have ever felt confusing, discouraging, or overwhelming, this episode gives you language, context, and relief. 🔗 Guest Resources Learn more from Thais Gibson: YouTube: Personal Development School HERE Instagram: @thepersonaldevelopmentschool Courses & Relationship Stages Program HERE 🔗 Host Resources Learn more from John Kim: Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Some of the most important questions we carry are the ones we’re afraid to say out loud — even in therapy. In this episode, John answers real, vulnerable questions about self-worth, dating, anger, emotional safety, and long-term relationships. These are the thoughts people whisper to themselves at night, hesitate to bring into the room, or feel ashamed for having at all. This conversation isn’t about quick fixes. It’s about slowing down, telling the truth, and understanding what’s really happening beneath the surface. Host Links: Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A year ago, on January 7th, my house burned down. This solo episode is a reflection on what that loss revealed — not just about grief, but about meaning, identity, and the quiet permission to live differently in the second half of life. I talk about the difference between a house and a home, what it means to lose community, and why starting over isn’t always a failure — sometimes it’s prescribed. From standing in the ashes of my cul-de-sac to building a slower, more intentional life in Costa Rica, this episode explores how tragedy can become an act break instead of an ending.  This episode is for anyone who feels tired of grinding, restless in their current life, or quietly sensing that the second half deserves a rewrite. You don’t have to burn your life down to change it — but sometimes life lights the match for you. If you listen to this podcast, I’d love to hear from you. Email me your thoughts: theangrytherapist@gmail.com Host Links & Resources: Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this reflective, unscripted conversation, John Kim speaks with therapist and yoga teacher Daniel Stewart about consciousness, ego, and authentic living. Daniel shares how a life-altering experience reshaped his relationship with presence, stillness, and inner truth. Together, they explore ego death as a doorway to growth, why slowing down matters, and how conscious awareness transforms the way we live and create. A grounding episode for anyone seeking a more intentional, meaningful life. 🔗 GUEST LINKS Daniel Stewart Website: https://danielstewart.com Yoga Studio: Rising Lotus Yoga — https://risinglotusyoga.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/minstrelion 🎙️ HOST LINKS Surf, Sex & Pancakes - Join John Kim for a surf retreat in Costa Rica. Sign up HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Now that 2026 is here, John Kim shares 12 powerful questions to help you live with more honesty, alignment, and intention this year. This episode isn’t about fixing yourself — it’s about telling the truth. About what feels empty.What you’re tolerating. And what it means to build a life that actually feels honest. A grounding conversation to return to throughout the year. 🌊 Surf Camp + Wellness Retreat HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of the video course, we explore one of the most powerful concepts in personal transformation: unlocking your inner code. You’ll learn how your false beliefs, old stories, and disconnected parts of self quietly shape your life — and how to rebuild a stronger, safer inner container that allows you to grow instead of staying stuck. Through storytelling, real-life examples, and practical reflection prompts, John walks you through: What You'll Learn: How false beliefs form and how they silently run your life Why dissolving them requires experience, not just mindset How to reconnect with the parts of you you’ve abandoned over time Why growth is a lifelong reunion with your inner self How to create a life container that supports expansion, confidence, and purpose Reflection Questions What false beliefs are cracking your life container? How are these beliefs rippling into your relationships, work, and self-esteem? What new experience can you give your body to prove the belief wrong? What part of you have you disconnected from? What would it look like to reunite with that version of you? This Episode Is For You If… ✔ You want to break patterns ✔ You want to feel more alive ✔ You’re ready to meet yourself again ✔ You want to grow without self-judgment ✔ You’re doing the work and want deeper tools 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this lesson, we explore how to move from a life shaped by fear, dread, shame, and survival into a life built on joy, creativity, presence, gratitude, and alignment. You’ll learn how to pull yourself out of lower frequencies, design a safe life container, and step into an attracting state — where the right people, opportunities, and experiences naturally find you. This is how you stop forcing your life… and start receiving it. 🌟 What You’ll Learn: What “higher frequencies” actually mean How to pull yourself out of lower emotional states The difference between chasing and attracting Why joy and creativity are powerful frequency shifters How to design a daily environment that supports growth What a “life container” is and why it expands your potential How attraction energy rewrites your relationships and opportunities 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode is about the parts of ourselves we don’t easily name. In Part 2, we explore unspoken hurt, projection, scarcity, envy, anger, and intimacy — and how these experiences shape the way we show up in relationships and in our work. We talk honestly about using productivity and helping others as a shield, the lingering fear that success doesn’t erase, and the protective parts we built long ago that may no longer serve us. This is not about fixing yourself. It’s about recognizing what’s actually running the room. A conversation for anyone willing to sit with truth — even when it’s uncomfortable. Follow Lair Torrent on Instagram ⁠HERE⁠ Buy Lair's book The Practice of Love ⁠HERE⁠ Lair's Website ⁠HERE⁠ In Bloom Summit ⁠HERE⁠ 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode is about what happens when we slow down and ask the questions that don’t come with neat answers. In an honest and reflective conversation, we explore the inner world behind the therapist’s role — the places where healing is still unfolding, emotions are still complicated, and vulnerability still matters. We talk about being seen in relationship, struggling with sadness and anger, the pull between authenticity and edge, and how early experiences shape the way we show up in life, love, and work. This isn’t a lesson. It’s a conversation. A reminder that healing doesn’t require perfection — only presence, honesty, and a willingness to stay with what’s real. If you’re on your own journey of self-understanding, this episode meets you there. Follow Lair Torrent on Instagram HERE Buy Lair's book The Practice of Love HERE Lair's Website HERE In Bloom Summit HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Hard Things to Bring Up in Therapy, we sit down with the questions people are often too afraid to ask out loud — the ones about love, loss, sex, shame, attachment, boredom, longing, and the quiet fear that maybe something is wrong with us. From wondering why “healthy love” feels boring after toxicity… to grieving a breakup someone else moved on from too quickly… to asking how often long-term couples should be intimate… to questioning why we attract emotionally unavailable partners… to the messy, human moments around sex, desire, loneliness, and readiness. These are the things we carry alone. This episode sets them down in the open. Why This Episode Matters These aren't just questions — they’re emotional crossroads.Most people bring them into therapy last, if ever.But naming them is the beginning of healing, clarity, and choosing differently. Perfect For You If… You’re in a season of confusion about love or relationships You’re healing from a breakup You’re dating but frustrated by your patterns You want a healthier relationship with intimacy and connection You’re afraid to ask the questions that matter most Listen Now Every question in this episode is a doorway. Step through. 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this module, we explore why healthy love can feel unfamiliar — even uncomfortable — when your nervous system is used to chaos or stress. You’ll learn how your brain adapts to emotional environments, why joy can feel out of reach, and how tiny moments of safety can transform your entire relational world. What you’ll learn: Why calm love can initially feel “flat” How repetition compulsion shows up in attraction The neuroscience behind your default mode network Why joy can feel unsafe — and how to rebuild access to it How tiny daily joys create enormous emotional change The difference between excitement and emotional intensity How to build a relationship that feels grounded, stable, and deeply connected This module is all about expanding your capacity for joy, hope, and relational peace — one small moment at a time. If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available ⁠HERE⁠ Follow Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald on Instagram HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this module of the video course, we explore why we repeat the same relationship patterns — even when we know they’re not good for us — and how understanding your emotional wiring can shift everything. You’ll learn: Why familiar relationships feel magnetic (even when they hurt) How early belonging shapes adult attraction The difference between healthy excitement and chaos How to navigate triggers with someone instead of alone Why healing happens in relationship, not isolation How to rewire your patterns with compassion instead of shame This episode is a reminder that your patterns aren’t failures — they’re information. And once you understand them, you can create the relationships you’ve always deserved. Follow Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald on Instagram HERE The Secure Self course is available HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In Part Two of this powerful conversation, John Kim and Shaka Senghor go even deeper into healing, alignment, and the spiritual mechanics of change. Shaka opens up about: How alignment shapes everything you attract What manifestation really is — and what it’s not Moving from shame into self-respect How imagination kept him alive in solitary confinement Daily practices that cultivate grace, joy, and hope The mindset shift that frees you from a lifetime of emotional prisons Why abundance begins with noticing the smallest moments This episode is the invitation to your next chapter. A conversation about energy, intention, and the quiet decisions that build a new life. 📘 Get Shaka’s book ‘How to Be Free’ ⁠HERE⁠ 📲 Follow Shaka Senghor on Instagram ⁠HERE⁠ 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this uplifting and deeply human conversation, John Kim sits with bestselling author and speaker Shaka Senghor to explore healing, forgiveness, purpose, and the power of rewriting your story. Shaka shares: What it meant to write a letter to his mother after decades The journey from incarceration to inner transformation How forgiveness liberated him more than anger ever could What manifestation really means: alignment, intention, and showing up How shame, grief, and vulnerability shape our healing Why imagination is a life-saving tool The surprising gift of human connection — even in solitary confinement If you need inspiration, hope, or a reminder that change is possible, this episode is for you. 📘 Get Shaka’s book ‘How to Be Free’ HERE 📲 Follow Shaka Senghor on Instagram HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, we explore the questions people are often afraid to ask out loud — the confusing, intimate, and deeply human moments that shape our relationships. From wondering if you’ve ever truly been in love, to navigating sticky boundaries, to deciding whether to stay or leave… we’re going there. We grouped your questions into three core themes to make the conversation grounded, digestible, and honest. 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode is an excerpt from our video course module on understanding trauma and the nervous system. In it, we break down trauma in a way that finally makes sense. You’ll learn why trauma isn’t about the “big event,” but about unbearable emotional experiences without a relational home — and why your brain responds exactly the way it does. Follow Dr. MaryCatherine McDonald on Instagram HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode brings together members of John Kim’s Single on Purpose coaching team for an unfiltered, deeply human conversation about what happened when the SOP community was suddenly closed. These are therapists, coaches, and facilitators — doing therapy on each other — exploring the activation, the grief, the meaning, and the unexpected wounds that surfaced. You’ll hear them talk about: What SOP meant to them personally and professionally The abrupt ending and why it hit so hard Abandonment wounds, leadership, and rupture-repair The magic of the community they built together Why therapists are human, vulnerable, and messy too What they’re taking with them into the next chapter Whether you were part of SOP, or you’re experiencing your own ending, transition, or rupture — this conversation will land. CONNECT WITH THE COACHES: Sean Cardinalli Instagram: @seancardinalli https://www.instagram.com/seancardinalli/ Medium: https://seancardinalli.medium.com/ Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/profile/1388439 Linktree: https://campsite.to/seancardinalli Mikey Brackett Instagram: @mikey.brackett Email: mikeybrackett@me.com Therapy website: https://mikeybtherapy.com Coaching website: https://mikeybrackett.com Madeleine Downey IG (info/coaching/counselling): @madeleinedowney Substack: https://madeleinedowney.substack.com (It’s Giving Alchemy) Shadow Work Group – Inner Compass Collective: https://inner-compass-collective.circle.so/ Email: Madeleine@vanessabennett.com Amy Brown Website: AmyBrown.Online IG: CoachingWithAmyBrown Email: Amy@MINDmgt.com Taune Lyons Taunelyons.com - therapy & somatic experiencing  Comingtooursenses.substack.com  Coming to our senses podcast - Spotify & apple IG: Taunelyons  Inner compass academy for classes on depth and somatic inner parenting Taune@taunelyons.com If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here. https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this module of the video course, we explore what really happens inside relationships when two people are trying — and struggling — to grow. We talk about emotional language, repair, anger, shutdown, nervous-system responses, and what it means to feel safe with someone for the first time. Whether you’re navigating conflict, trying to understand your partner better, or learning how to show up with more emotional maturity… this episode will help you understand what’s underneath the reactions you keep getting stuck in. LINKS: 🔗 Secure Self Video Course — transform how you communicate, repair, and connect HERE 👉 Apply to Inner Compass Academy HERE 👉 Follow Vanessa on Instagram HERE 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this raw, unfiltered reflection, John shares the real story behind going rogue as a therapist — from coffee-shop sessions to walk-and-talks, to breaking every rule therapy school ever taught him. He explores the lifelong pattern of exchanging truth for membership, the fear of being seen, and the moment one client validated everything he was terrified to try. This episode dives into authenticity, boundaries, regret, responsibility, and what it really means to help people while staying human yourself. Key Themes & Takeaways: Why authenticity often feels like rebellion The moment validation becomes a catalyst The battle between honesty and belonging The emotional cost of doing therapy differently The blurry line between helping and harming The evolving role of therapists in a social media world Why growth is abstract, nonlinear, and deeply personal 📘 Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices