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The Science of Dating

The Science of Dating
Author: Bryce Dunford
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© 1993 Bryce Dunford
Description
Brother Bryce Dunford is an Institute instructor for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This podcast contains his course: The Science of Dating. In this podcast, we will explore 10 pitfalls that many fall into during dating. It is our hope that helping young adults identify these pitfalls will also help them avoid them.
21 Episodes
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Pitfall #4 is when you are dating at one level (ie. on a date with a 1), but your focus and purpose is at another level (ie. you're looking for a match).
Pitfall #4 is when you are dating at one level (ie. on a date with a 1), but your focus and purpose is at another level (ie. you're looking for a match). In this class, we look at appropriate dating at levels 4, 5, and 6.
Pitfall #5 is not knowing the difference between 'Being in Love' (the thrill) and love (the choice, the committment).
Pitfall #10. Like the one who only received one talent, our human nature often causes us to be so afraid of failure that we do not try. This, the Lord rebuked in the parable. He wants a people that would rather fail than not try.
Heavenly Father's greatest priority is helping create eternal families.
Heavenly Father will help you find an eternal companion, but we must understand some of the rules of revelation the apply to dating.
Pitfall #1 is the tendancy to jump right to relationship dating. It is often awkward and uncomfortable. There is a better way: Friendship Dating.
Pitfall #2 is when you do not understand nor take full advantage of relationship dating. We are looking for a match; which is the absence of deal-breakers.
Pitfall #3 is when we let our hearts jump to marriage before we know if we are a match.
Inappropriate dating is when your actions do not match that is appropriate for the level. Inappropriate dating often results in missed opportunities or uncomfortable encounters.
Love is not an emotion. Love is a choice. Falling in love or being in love is an emotion. Many do not understand the difference and it may cost them dearly.
Many are looking for someone just like them. Perhaps the best match is someone who is strong where you are weak.
Putting a Preference on the Deal-breaker list means we narrow our pool and exclude some who might be a match. Putting a Deal-breaker on the preference list means a likely painful breakup later.
Expecting a future spouse to be free of mistakes, even big ones, might cause us to miss out on some wonderful, repentant people. Like God does to each of us, we should grant a probationary state
In balance to not granting repentance, we must also recognize when change is not occuring and deal-breakers are likely to remain deal-breakers.
Being that soul that would rather fail than live with the fact that you did not even try will not only help in finding an eternal companion, but will help in succeeding in the latter-days.
Now we turn our attention to divine helps in our persuit of an eternal companion. Knowing that our exaltation is Heavenly Father's highest priority, we should expect His help in finding an eternal companion.
No one finds an eternal companion like they found investigators in the mission field. The rules of revelation are different.
The Lord has give two requirement to make a marriage last eternally. Perhaps we have emphasized the wrong one and need to adjust our thinking.
In The Family; A Proclamation to the World, 15 prophets, seers, and revelators have proclaimed nine central principles that make marriage and family successful. Here we begin with Repentance.