Marriage Unhindered

Doug returns to the mailbag to tackle tough questions about emotionally abusive family relationships, including forgiveness, boundaries, and seeking counseling. The show closes with the Friday Rant. Listener questions and comments: Art – I’m going through a divorce. What type of counseling should I seek? (10:38) Lenea – I’m facing a situation like the man who doesn’t want a divorce. My daughter is close to divorce—are there lawyers who specialize in this type of case? (20:42) Carlos – My wife didn’t want to see a Catholic counselor, even though friends offered to help cover one. Here’s what I’ve learned from counseling. (23:20)   Resources:   Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   Happy Marriage for Life https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/   Catholic Therapists https://catholictherapists.com/

Dr. Mario Sacasa joins Doug for a discussion on therapy. When should you go to therapy, and how do you find a good therapist?   Listener questions and comments:   Don - Critical stress response debriefing: Is that actually helpful as therapy? (10:02) Nicholas - My wife is at home and I work. I am struggling to manage devotions as a new father. (19:11) Patsy - I feel like my husband needs his own therapy and he won’t go. (26:45) Amelia - Do you have any advice for my son who is getting into marriage therapy? He is in college. (30:47) Mary & Paul - I met your son, Father Joe! We received his blessing. (36:04) Martin - I was a police officer and 4 of my guys committed suicide. As a first responder we need to sit down on the outside of the agency to respond to people. (38:19)   Resources: Dr. Mario Sacasa https://www.drmariosacasa.com/   Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   Happy Marriage for Life https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/   Catholic Therapists https://catholictherapists.com/   Catholic Psychotherapy https://catholicpsychotherapy.org/

Doug goes to the mail bag. How do you deal with the suicide of a family member? If you or a loved one is struggling with suicidal thoughts, call or text 988 for help.   Listener question and comments: John - When someone dies by suicide, family should not blame themselves. There is always help, and the Chaplet of Divine Mercy is so powerful. (9:05) Amaris - My brother committed suicide on the 4th of this month and I would like to share my story. (13:34) Victor - My nephew took his life at 18. There were no signs leading up to it. He was a good student and it was so surprising. You never know what’s going on. (24:34) Lee - I just had a friend of 55 years involved in a murder/suicide. I don’t know how to get over something like this. (26:47) Andrew - I want to share a couple of resources I used. My dad committed suicide and I needed a lot of help. (33:27)   Resources:   If you or a loved one is struggling with suicidal thoughts, call or text 988 for help.   Post-traumatic Growth https://relevantradio.com/2026/01/post-traumatic-growth/

When you got married, how much time did you spend discerning God’s will for you? Today on Marriage Unhindered, Elizabeth Busby joins Doug to discuss marriage discernment.   Listener questions and comments: Bill - Do dating rules apply to all ages? (15:30) Julie - I have a son who is going to be 22 and he is going to be graduating. I am concerned he won’t be able to find a wife soon. (37:55)   Resources: Discerning Marriage https://www.discerningmarriage.com/

Doug explores how lying affects marriages, how to respond, and ways to foster honesty. Listeners share personal experiences, including insights from a recovered liar and the impact of dementia on a spouse’s truthfulness. Listener questions and comments: Junior – I am a reformed liar and want to share my perspective. Confession helped me realize you don’t have to lie. (35:37) Paulette – My husband died from dementia and began lying years ago when he couldn’t explain events. I now see his lying as a symptom of the disease. (45:23)   Resources:   Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   Rekindled Hearts Marriage Bundle https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle   Happy Marriage for Life https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/

Doug dives into the mailbag to address what to do when a husband is sexting another woman and how couples can navigate fear and conflict around having children. He also tackles communication breakdowns and how to help loved ones facing marital abuse. Listener questions and comments: Addison – We have been married nine years and feel unheard when we try to communicate. Our arguments now seem to come out of nowhere. (21:05) Kye – I became pregnant later in life and my husband felt unprepared at first. How can couples work through fear and still build a healthy family? (36:55) Susan – How can I help a family member whose marriage is marked by verbal abuse? My sister-in-law is struggling with my brother’s behavior. (38:46)   Resources:   Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   Rekindled Hearts Marriage Bundle https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle   Happy Marriage for Life https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/

Doug continues to unpack 13 things marriage therapists wish couples knew before they got married.   Listener questions and comments: Don - My wife has told me that I've become jaded because of the gross work I do as a paramedic. I feel like I can't share that stuff with my wife because she shouldn’t be subject to it. She feels alienated. (18:04) Richard - My wife left me for our marriage therapist. How do I find a good therapist in the future? (45:44)   Resources:   Catholic Therapists https://catholictherapists.com/   Catholic Psychotherapy https://catholicpsychotherapy.org/   Hold Me Tight https://www.amazon.com/Hold-Me-Tight-Conversations-Lifetime/dp/031611300X   Rebuilding Trust https://relevantradio.com/2026/01/rebuilding-trust/     Things therapists wish you knew Marriage isn’t a fix for a broken relationship Love isn’t all you need You’re marrying their family too Conflict is inevitable in every relationship Financial compatibility is critical Intimacy fades over time Your partner can’t fulfill all your needs Baggage doesn’t unpack itself You’re going to change and so will your partner Shared goals are essential Communication styles matter Routine can be a double-edged sword Marriage is not always 50/50

Doug shares the inspiring story of a couple who got back together after their annulment. He emphasizes the importance of seeking a profound encounter with God, as well as finding a skilled therapist. Reconciling takes courage, faith, and trust in God that He will make all things new.   Listener questions and comments: Theresa - My husband was running around with other women. Is that grounds for annulment? (18:56) Kelly - What should you do when you’re not happy in your marriage? My husband changed and doesn’t go to church. He put us in debt, and we are political opposites. (32:54) Adam - I am a Lutheran, and I went to Mass this week. I really liked it, and I want to encourage people to attend church. It was great to see so many people there. (44:59)   Resources:   Catholic Therapists https://catholictherapists.com/   Catholic Psychotherapy https://catholicpsychotherapy.org/   Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   Rekindled Hearts Marriage Bundle https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle   Happy Marriage for Life https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/  

Doug shares 5 things marriage therapists wish couples knew before they got married.   Listener questions and comments: Sarah - How do I build trust with my fiancé after we had something happen that broke it. (3:46)   Resources: Catholic Therapists https://catholictherapists.com/   Catholic Psychotherapy https://catholicpsychotherapy.org/   Hold Me Tight https://www.amazon.com/Hold-Me-Tight-Conversations-Lifetime/dp/031611300X   Things therapists wish you knew Marriage isn’t a fix for a broken relationship Love isn’t all you need You’re marrying their family too Conflict is inevitable in every relationship Financial compatibility is critical

Have you suffered a traumatic event in your life or more specifically your marriage? Today on Marriage Unhindered, Dr. Joyce Mikal-Flynn joins Doug to discuss growing through trauma.   Listener questions and comments: Mary - After suffering physical traumatic injuries how do you deal with doctors who trivialized and dismiss what happened to you? (23:53) Monica - How do I navigate coping together with my family who have all been affected by child abuse in the home? (35:59) Deedee - Are there studies on the influence of fathers on young women as far as trauma goes? (43:57)   Resources:   Dr. Joyce Mikal-Flynn https://www.metahab.com/    

Doug shares the importance of establishing a strong emotional connection in marriage. PLUS: The Friday rant!   Listener questions and comments: Mary - Contraception gets in between a husband and a wife. (8:36) Anita - Everything you are saying are things I've said to my husband. I feel like I've been so distant. (22:43) Lorraine - Would you agree that once the honeymoon is over that you should make an effort to think 'what would my life be without them?' Be grateful. My husband died and now I’m grateful for the time I had with him. (46:01)   Resources:   Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   Happy Marriage for Life https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/   The Gift of NaPro Technology https://relevantradio.com/2025/03/the-gift-of-napro-technology/   4 Strategies for rebuilding emotional intimacy Prioritize purposeful communication Reignite shared interests and activities Integrate rituals of connection into your daily routine Embrace the power of nonverbal communication

Why do break ups happen? How do you live with a hoarder? Can AI improve your marriage? Doug goes to the mailbag answering these questions and more.   Listener questions and comments: Christine - I want to give you a solution: A friend of mine said that they made a very small area and her husband could be messy there. (17:41) Mike - I am a hoarder and I would like to tell you how it is good. (28:56) Rita - I am a retired therapist and my suggestion is that for the things you feel you can’t throw away, taking pictures help. (30:51) Ken - I have a first communion garment that I don’t want to give to my nephew. Am I a hoarder for this? (35:00) Jason - I think AI is a good mediator. It’s like a father but doesn’t get mad. (37:00) Mike - It depends how you use the AI. If you put in negative prompts it will skew towards what it thinks you want. (37:50)   Resources:   Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   International OCD Foundation https://iocdf.org/   National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) https://www.nami.org/

Doug shares a case study from Impossible Marriages Redeemed by Leila Miller. When getting married, the wife’s backup plan was divorce. After years of arguing and the husband’s alcohol abuse, hope seemed grim.   Listener questions and comments: Ted - My wife filed for divorce about a month ago and I am wondering how to keep her here or if I need to let her go. (35:11) Angel - I was a military wife and my husband had a cheating and drug problem. He kept it from my children until right before he died. They are angry and hurt even though he’s dead. I want them to love their father after his death. (43:23)   Resources: Impossible Marriages Redeemed https://www.leilamiller.net/impossiblemarriagesredeemedpdf   The Forgiveness Institute https://internationalforgiveness.com/

Doug shares 6 New Year’s resolutions to help marriages thrive. He also gives rules for how to limit your teens social media use and screen time.   Listener questions and comments: Tracey - My daughter took my granddaughter’s car. They think she was drunk driving but she was not and now my granddaughter is angry and wants to come live with me. What should I do? (21:59)   Resources: The Anxious Generation https://www.amazon.com/Anxious-Generation-Rewiring-Childhood-Epidemic/dp/0593655036   6 New Year’s resolutions for your marriage I will use the daily pinpricks in married life to grow in virtue. Every day I will pray for, and about my spouse. I will give my spouse one compliment a day. I will use 'the formula' to talk with my spouse to let them know when they hurt me. I will use the words “I’m sorry” and “I forgive you” as many times as needed. I will limit my use of screens, especially when my spouse and I are together.

What are some ways you would like to strengthen your marriage? Today on Marriage Unhindered, Doug shares how to stay focused on God’s love in your marriage. He discusses the importance of growing in virtue as a couple.   Listener questions and comments: Maria - I am struggling because I don’t receive the love and gratitude for all that I do for my family. (19:14) Hugh - My thought on the quote from St. Francis De Sales: it's a call for married people to take every problem in their marriage and offer it up to God. (23:56) Tom - I once told my wife that I was her cross. It didn't go over well. She divorced me and we received a declaration of nullity. (26:04) Michelle - My marriage has been struggling since we got married. I started listening to your show just when I thought it was over.  I utilized what you're talking about.  I started seeing a Catholic therapist. I want my marriage to be holy and I want my husband to be more engaged in the Catholic faith. (40:08) John - I have been married for 5 years. In terms of finding a fault, I'm bad at time management and my spouse tells me to work on it. (45:58)

What does it mean to be joined together in matrimony? What is the difference between natural and sacramental marriage? Fr. Robert Altier joins Doug to tackle these questions and more.   Listener questions and comments: Robert - If the wife concealed the fact that she was infertile, is that grounds for an annulment? (12:45) Susie - We were married by a protestant minister as non-practicing Catholics. What is the status of our marriage? (23:30) Patrick - What does the Church think about prenuptials? Does the Church frown on that? (29:21) George - Two people are 70. Can they be married if they cannot consummate the marriage? They are open to adoption. (34:58) Richard - If mental illness is not diagnosed until after marriage, is the marriage valid? (38:23) Amy - Is it true that someone who cannot conceive won’t be married by a priest? (40:38)   Resources:   Marriage Bundle https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle   God’s Plan for Your Marriage https://godsplanforyourmarriagebook.com/

Monica Hinderer joins Doug to discuss tips for dealing with a grumpy teenager.   Listener questions and comments: Clara - How do you handle balancing your emotions and venting while dealing with teens? (22:38) Sarah - You both are super helpful. How do we speak to teens about helping around the house and being attentive to the needs of people and the household? (32:29) Len - There is a great story. Teens are aware of the growth they have experienced after the end of their teen years. (38:34)

Whose responsibility is it that you are in a good marriage? Doug continues to share common phrases that can help each spouse take responsibility in strengthening their marriage.   Listener questions and comments: Michelle - My husband is in recovery for drug and alcohol addiction right now, and he has taken on the addiction of working, and I want to navigate through this while he can’t fulfill my needs emotionally. (19:14) Chris - I struggle with telling my wife that I trust her. She will have an outburst and threaten me. How can I get better at trusting her? (32:53) Matt - What do I do if I’m in a marriage that makes me want to satisfy my wife and her children, but will force me to turn away from God? (38:33) Sylvia - I’m a recovering alcoholic. There is hope, and your family will come around. (46:54)   Resources: Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   Happy Marriage for Life https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/   Phrases to instantly strengthen your marriage I appreciate you. I am sorry. I believe in you. How can I help? You make me happy! I trust you. I’m proud of you. Let’s talk about it. I’m grateful for us. What do you think? I love you. I’m here for you. I admire you. Thank you for being you. We can do this.

Have you ever used ChatGPT to gain a deeper understanding of your spouse? Have you used AI to help you understand your spouse's emotions? Today, Doug discusses the harm ChatGPT is doing to marriages.   Listener questions and comments: John - My friend used ChatGPT to do therapy, but he kept it from his girlfriend. It led to the end of their relationship. (21:34) Angelica - I used AI to be playful with my husband. (35:55)   Resources:   Marriage Unhindered https://www.marriageunhindered.com/   Rekindled Hearts Marriage Bundle https://relevantradio.store/collections/books/products/marriage-bundle   Happy Marriage for Life https://www.happymarriageforlife.com/

Dr. Christine Bacon joins Doug to discuss her book, The Super Couple. PLUS: 6 faulty assumptions of a super marriage.   Listener questions and comments: Kimberly - My husband was in a substance abuse program, and I didn't know about it. I found out the hard way. How can I support him from a spouse's perspective? He's not Catholic, and he's adamant about divorcing me but also wants to be a better father. (18:07) Rosie - How can I mend the relationships in my family? (28:50) Colleen - During my marriage, I was abused, but we persevered and got help, and now we are better! (39:12)   Resources: Dr. Christine Bacon https://www.drchristinebacon.com/radio   The Super Couple: A Formula for Extreme Happiness in Marriage https://www.amazon.com/Super-Couple-Formula-Happiness-Marriage/dp/163393201X   6 Faulty Assumptions They got married "the right way." They learned "super" from their parents. They never endured any major struggles. They were never attracted to others besides their spouse. They couldn't possibly be married to pessimists. They were more alike than different.