Manager’s Tea Break

“This event is going to be a disaster!”That’s what my project lead said to me with a key conference just months away. It wasn’t just stress — tension had been brewing in the group for a number of weeks now. Despite having a skilled (and resourced) team, along with a solid plan, progress was slow and communication was breaking down.  Early in my leadership career, I thought success was all about getting the right people with the right skills into the right roles. That formula — matching tasks to the people with the technical expertise —had served me well. But, this time it wasn’t working.The project lead was a very organized person and he had created a detailed project plan for the event. But, he was struggling with the fact that the project was not going according to that plan, and he felt that he was the only one seriously worrying about it being behind schedule.A couple of other project members were currently focusing on a conference that was coming up earlier, and struggling to keep to the agreed timelines. While, on the other hand, a different team member felt the project was doing just fine, and that there was plenty of time ahead of the event to make things successful. He was just irritated that the project lead wanted to move (what he saw as) unnecessarily fast.I noticed that a few times after their project meeting, one or the other team members would go for a coffee with a team member who wasn’t on the project. I’d often see her sitting with different project members and could overhear her listening to their challenges and trying to smooth over some misunderstandings.When doing a check-in with the project lead, it was obvious he needed more support. Clearly, the group needed to talk through the issues brewing before they boiled over. He was already overwhelmed and as things were behind schedule, it wasn’t fair to expect him to become an expert in conflict management overnight.Rather than offering to jump in myself, which would not only undermine him, but take away a valuable learning opportunity, I suggested he could try bringing the other team member into the project. I’d seen from the informal coffee meetings that she had a natural gift for getting people to open up, and that seemed to be exactly what this team needed. That way, he could capitalize on her natural strengths — effective listening and facilitating discussion — to get the group to open up and start working together more effectively.Almost overnight, the group transformed. Her presence helped to create more discussion within the meetings, which meant the different team members could understand a bit better where everyone else was coming from. Communication started to flow more naturally and soon afterwards the team started to hit their stride.That experience taught me that it’s not just about the technical skills team members bring to the table, it’s also about how to best capitalize on their individual strengths.Full blog available on Medium.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Mapbox on UnsplashMusic credits:True Feelings: Relaxing Lofi by The Turquoise MoonRelaxing Lo Fi Chill by SondéSofa Sleeping by Jon Presstone This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

This summer, I flew back to the US to attend a family wedding. As a frequent traveller, I had prepared accordingly:iPad?✔️ Charged and readyNetflix?✔️ TV shows downloadedSpotify?✔️ Playlists available offlineYet, I made a mistake I’ve done already one too many times before: connecting the iPad to the airport Wi-Fi during my layover.After my connecting flight took off, when settling myself down with my iPad ready to watch a little TV, I realized my error.Most of the shows I had previously prepared had now disappeared. Those that remained displayed the error, “Download not available in this country.”I started mentally kicking myself.Fool — you should have kept it on airplane mode until arriving.Groaning and resigning myself to the airline's offering, I looked up at the seat console TV to browse the in-flight options. Then I noticed a little sticker on the back of the seat, reading “free high-speed in-flight Wi-Fi available”.Instantly my brain oscillated from “Hallelujah!” to complete skepticism.I bet it’s expensive and slow as hell.I tried connecting to the network and, as expected, I was met with…not much. After waiting a little while, an orange error message under the Wi-Fi network appeared that read “No internet connection.”I tried forgetting and reconnecting to the network a few times and eventually, I did manage to get a connection — and, incredibly, it seemed like it was indeed for free! (I had assumed there would be tiered plans.)But, I couldn’t get a single webpage to load, it was just continuously buffering.Now, the frustration I had with myself for connecting to the internet prematurely was displaced onto the airline.I felt it was a classic case of over-promise, under-deliver, and it left me feeling even more irritated than before.Full blog available on Medium.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Aerojet on UnsplashMusic credits:True Feelings: Relaxing Lofi by The Turquoise MoonRelaxing Lo Fi Chill by SondéSofa Sleeping by Jon Presstone This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

“I don’t know what you do.”Not the best way to kick off a feedback meeting.But there I sat, opposite the manager of my manager (my “skip-level manager”) who informed me bluntly.I’d set this meeting after collecting my first round of feedback for my 360-degree review. As part of the second round, I was openly sharing the results with everyone who had been asked to complete the survey, and using it to have a discussion for further insights.I thought it was going to be a great chance to finally have a one-on-one discussion with my skip-level manager and learn what he thought of the work I was doing.Alas, it rapidly dawned on me that he had no idea.“How can he be this ill-informed?”“What the heck is my manager sharing with him?”These thoughts and more were running through my head.Hastily abandoning the original meeting topic, I gave him the elevator pitch for the topics I was responsible for and the projects the team was working on.Several of the team’s recent launches had enjoyed great internal visibility, but it appeared the information hadn’t made it to him (or at very least he had forgotten). So, I asked what I could be doing to better support him. He immediately rattled off a couple of tasks — neither of which were within my domain and therefore something I could help with. It was frustrating not being able to say “yes” to help him with any of the tasks — but the responsibility was clearly within other teams, and in fact some of the things he wanted were already underway. He seemed not to be aware of this either.I felt at a loss. I resolved to try to better educate him on the work we were doing. If he didn’t know what we were doing, then obviously in his eyes the work was neither valuable nor making an impact.As he was C-level and without much availability, I offered a short (20-minute) monthly alignment meeting where I could go a bit more in-depth on a different project area each time to increase his awareness. He readily accepted. Although I left the meeting without actionable feedback for my 360-degree review, I still felt I had learned a valuable lesson. I made a commitment to focus on improving the relationship with my skip-level manager.Full blog MediumCredits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by LinkedIn Sales Solutions on UnsplashMusic credits:True Feelings: Relaxing Lofi by The Turquoise MoonRelaxing Lo Fi Chill by SondéSofa Sleeping by Jon Presstone This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

Back in 2018, I launched my first online course. I was full of excitement, nerves, and anticipation.How would my course be received?Would people like it?I had spent months and countless hours preparing the topic, scripting, filming, editing, and preparing everything to market after launch.Post-launch, I spent the first weeks maniacally refreshing the Udemy Instructor page to see if I had any new students or reviews.Much to my delight, the reviews were overwhelmingly positive. As a result of this social proof, the number of students in the course continued to grow and I gleefully started considering what my next course topic should be.Until I came across a 1-star review with the comment:“Not a great match. A little too basic…”A pretty vanilla comment.Not personal and clearly explaining the reason for the poor review.Seems pretty fair right?Yet, I felt it.I had spent so long working on this course — and someone didn’t like it!I was crushed.I immediately went into mental defense mode:Too basic? I said it was a beginner course.They should have read the course landing page better.I bet they didn’t even look through the course content outline.By this point, the course already had over a hundred reviews, typically 4 or 5 stars. Yet, this 1-star review is the one I remember.I don’t remember a quote from a positive review. Though I know there were many lovely ones because I can remember how I felt reading them. But, I can’t remember the comments themselves off the top of my head.Full blog available on Medium.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Kira auf der Heide on UnsplashMusic credits:True Feelings: Relaxing Lofi by The Turquoise MoonRelaxing Lo Fi Chill by SondéSofa Sleeping by Jon Presstone This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

It’s both exciting and stressful to hire new team members.On the one hand, you have excitement, thinking you can get some fresh energy into the team, and the hope that you can hire the perfect candidate who can deliver what you need.On the other, in the back of your mind, you might have a little anxiety thinking that if this person doesn’t work out, you risk wasting your time and having your judgment questioned — as you’re the one who hired them, right?HR teams are well aware of the cost of a bad hire, which can include lost productivity, lost time and costs associated with recruiting and training, damage to employee morale, and possible damage to a company’s reputation or client relationships.According to research by CareerBuilder, those costs add up to $17,000 on average for each bad hire.That’s why many companies implemented and now use the STAR method — to lower their risk of a bad hire.The method has been around for decades. Consulting firm DDI is credited with creating the STAR method back in the 1970s. Yet it continues to gain steam because having a structured interview process can increase a hiring manager’s objectivity and improve comparability between candidates.Full blog available on Medium.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Eric Prouzet on UnsplashMusic credits:True Feelings: Relaxing Lofi by The Turquoise MoonRelaxing Lo Fi Chill by SondéSofa Sleeping by Jon Presstone This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

When most marketers (or non-marketers) mention retargeting, they tend to be thinking of one particular combination: using website visits together with display ads.But, retargeting is so much more than just these two mediums.Any combination of the channels and mediums you have at your disposal can be used together. Not to forget often overlooked mediums like direct mail.I’m always interested in reading about ways others are using retargeting.It inspires me and helps me think about how I can be more creative when using retargeting in my own work. I’ve curated two of my favorite examples with an example from my own life to help provide you with food for thought about how to retarget using two mediums that aren’t just websites & online display ads.Full blog available on Medium.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Image created by author.Music credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

Although I’m a leader, I’m naturally more of an introvert.It’s true — I’m happy to get some quiet time to work in peace and think things through.Small talk and having to be “always on” in the office drains my energy.Unfortunately for me, it’s extroverts who are typically considered to be the most effective leaders. According to Harvard Business Review,65% of senior corporate executives viewing introversion as a barrier to leadership.Yet, introverted leaders have unique strengths, such as their ability to listen, think deeply, and build strong relationships with their team members.For me, building relationships at work has always been more of an active effort.I know developing bonds with my team is important, and I go out of my way to make opportunities where we can connect.Full blog available on Medium.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Omar BENSALAH on UnsplashMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

What comes to mind when someone mentions personal branding?Do you immediately think about your LinkedIn feed, consultants and other annoying people pitching you their services?For many, the term “personal branding” is starting to morph into more of a negative connotation. As if conscientiously working to build your brand puts too much emphasis on the sales aspect.An insight from a recent leadership peer group discussion I was in last month, really started to change my mindset on this topic with the question:How would it be if instead of calling it personal branding, we called it your leadership shadow?Full blog available on Medium.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Martino Pietropoli on UnsplashMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

A story about a bad example of feedback and how that taught me what not to do.Read the full blog.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Jon Tyson on UnsplashMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

Having a good level of self-awareness can benefit you both personally, and in your career, in many ways such as: better communication, better decision-making skills, better leadership skills, higher levels of happiness, more confidence and better job satisfaction.Sounds great in principle, but how can you actually develop this feeling/ understanding?Full blog available here.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Self Awareness Vectors by VecteezyMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

If you’re slightly anxious about giving performance reviews as a new manager, the first thing to know is that it’s completely normal.Evaluating team members, delivering constructive feedback, and addressing areas for improvement can be daunting. The potential impact of your feedback can further elevate the pressure you put on yourself.Read the full blog article.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Bethany Legg on UnsplashMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

I thoroughly believe that managers who work on honing their coaching skills earn one of the best tools to empower their teams.Read the full blog article.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Christina @ wocintechchat.com on UnsplashMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

Why should we even bother to look into the motivational theories? My view — there’s food for thought in each one. There’s no perfectly correct theory to choose from. (I wish there was, that would make our lives as managers much easier!)So, in my view it’s worth taking a look at both some of the classic, and more recent, motivational theories to improve our base understanding of motivation. It’s interesting to see how different theories have evolved over time, and, for many of us, by the end of our careers there will likely be better research around to draw from.Full blog available here.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by Magnet.me on UnsplashMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

There are a lot of misconceptions about coaching. What is it? Why should organizations and managers care? And, what’s the first step to even start?Read the full blog article.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by LinkedIn Sales Solutions on UnsplashMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com

Asking open-ended questions is an aspect of active listening that builds on the skills of paraphrasing and allows the listener to gather more information. This skill can be really helpful in supporting team members.Full blog article available here.Credits:Read aloud by the author.Image credits:Photo by airfocus on UnsplashMusic credits:Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0 Music promoted by Copyright Free Music - Background Music For Videos. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit nikkiparsons.substack.com